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1
00:00:03,525 --> 00:00:05,179
I got the afternoon free.
2
00:00:05,222 --> 00:00:06,441
You wanna watch
some of that doubleheader?
3
00:00:07,616 --> 00:00:08,965
Actually, I'd love to,
4
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,923
but I'm going downtown
to watch it with the guys.
5
00:00:14,449 --> 00:00:16,059
Why wasn't I invited?
6
00:00:16,103 --> 00:00:18,496
For the same reason we didn't
invite Bernie Madoff...
7
00:00:18,540 --> 00:00:20,716
Because we knew
you were unavailable.
8
00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:22,587
Listen, man,
you just got married.
9
00:00:22,631 --> 00:00:24,067
The other guys have been
married for years,
10
00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:26,330
and they still have to lie
about where they're going.
11
00:00:26,374 --> 00:00:28,332
Oh, yeah? Well, I can go
if I want to,
12
00:00:28,376 --> 00:00:30,726
and I don't have
to lie about it.
13
00:00:30,769 --> 00:00:32,206
So, you're gonna
tell Suzanne
14
00:00:32,249 --> 00:00:35,470
that you're gonna spend
six hours on a Sunday in a bar,
15
00:00:35,513 --> 00:00:39,082
drinking beer and watching
baseball with a bunch of dudes?
16
00:00:39,126 --> 00:00:41,998
Fifty dollars says that's
exactly what I'm gonna say.
17
00:00:42,912 --> 00:00:44,087
Exactly?
18
00:00:44,131 --> 00:00:45,654
Exactly, exactly.
19
00:00:46,959 --> 00:00:48,918
C'mon, Mom!
That isn't fair!
20
00:00:48,961 --> 00:00:52,095
That's like TI going to jail
for killing Patrick Swayze!
21
00:00:52,139 --> 00:00:53,879
Lindsey, that makes no sense!
22
00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:55,011
Exactly!
23
00:00:56,752 --> 00:00:58,188
What's going on?
24
00:00:58,232 --> 00:01:01,061
Oh, well, the kids
are asking me about
their allowance,
25
00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:03,585
but they haven't done
any work around the house
all week.
26
00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:06,370
Now, I pay you guys
an allowance to be nice,
27
00:01:06,414 --> 00:01:09,417
I'm not gonna pay y'all
just to live here anymore.
28
00:01:09,460 --> 00:01:11,810
C'mon, your mother is right.
29
00:01:11,854 --> 00:01:13,986
You kids know an allowance
is payment for work.
30
00:01:14,030 --> 00:01:15,423
Just like a job.
31
00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:17,381
And if you don't do your job,
you don't get paid.
32
00:01:17,425 --> 00:01:19,079
Thank you, Nick.
33
00:01:19,122 --> 00:01:22,473
We promise to do
more work this week.Yeah. We promise.
34
00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:25,824
And I promise to pay you
when you do the work.
35
00:01:25,868 --> 00:01:27,913
What about this week?
36
00:01:27,957 --> 00:01:30,307
You should've thought about
this week last week.
37
00:01:30,351 --> 00:01:32,744
If you don't start thinking
about next week this week,
38
00:01:32,788 --> 00:01:34,703
you're gonna have
the same problem next week
39
00:01:34,746 --> 00:01:37,575
that you're having this week,
when you could've solved it
last week.
40
00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:40,796
So, we're not gonna get
our money from last week
until next week?
41
00:01:40,839 --> 00:01:41,927
What about
this week?
42
00:01:41,971 --> 00:01:43,886
There is no this week.
43
00:01:43,929 --> 00:01:45,670
Now, I don't understand
what you're worried about.
44
00:01:45,714 --> 00:01:47,150
You have everything you need.
45
00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:49,805
But it's summer.
We need disposable income.
46
00:01:49,848 --> 00:01:53,548
Well, by being lazy,
you threw away
last week's allowance.
47
00:01:53,591 --> 00:01:56,507
So, I suggest,
unless you want to dispose
48
00:01:56,551 --> 00:01:58,379
of this week's allowance,
you get to work.
49
00:01:58,422 --> 00:02:00,207
Got it?BOTH: Got it.
50
00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:06,256
Oh, hello, Martin.Hi, Suzanne.
51
00:02:06,300 --> 00:02:08,258
What are you
guys up to today?
52
00:02:08,302 --> 00:02:10,913
Hmm. What are we
up to, Nick?
53
00:02:10,956 --> 00:02:13,220
Today, I am going
to a sports bar,
54
00:02:13,263 --> 00:02:14,699
on a Sunday, for six hours,
55
00:02:14,743 --> 00:02:17,659
to drink beer and watch
baseball with a bunch of dudes.
56
00:02:17,702 --> 00:02:19,269
Great.
Good for you.
57
00:02:21,315 --> 00:02:22,838
See?
58
00:02:22,881 --> 00:02:25,101
A real man doesn't have to
lie to his wife. Now, pay up.
59
00:02:26,189 --> 00:02:27,364
Next week.
60
00:02:29,888 --> 00:02:30,933
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
61
00:02:30,976 --> 00:02:32,064
♪ Are we there yet?
62
00:02:33,109 --> 00:02:36,243
♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me
63
00:02:36,286 --> 00:02:38,070
♪ Tell me, are we there yet?
64
00:02:38,114 --> 00:02:40,029
♪ Are we there yet?
65
00:02:44,729 --> 00:02:45,904
MARTIN: Hi.
66
00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:50,213
[SIGHS]
67
00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,084
Hi, there.
Welcome to Booty.
68
00:02:52,128 --> 00:02:53,912
Hello.
69
00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:56,350
Man, I thought we were going
to a regular sports bar.
70
00:02:56,393 --> 00:02:58,352
You didn't tell me we were
going to Booty.
71
00:02:58,395 --> 00:03:01,006
What's wrong with Booty?
It's a pirate-themed sports bar.
72
00:03:01,050 --> 00:03:03,357
Hence the name "Booty."
Like treasure.
73
00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:04,793
WAITRESS: Hi, guys.
74
00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:06,751
That's Treasure.
75
00:03:06,795 --> 00:03:09,928
Man, I gotta get out of here.
How am I gonna explain this
to Suzanne?
76
00:03:09,972 --> 00:03:13,193
Oh, aren't you the real man
who doesn't have to lie to
his wife?
77
00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:15,020
We're doing exactly what you
said we were gonna do.
78
00:03:15,064 --> 00:03:17,501
We're at the bar, drinking beer,
watching the game.
79
00:03:17,545 --> 00:03:20,635
Yeah, but she's gonna want
to know why I had to watch
the game here.
80
00:03:20,678 --> 00:03:23,377
Because Booty
has such amazing...
81
00:03:23,420 --> 00:03:24,943
Wings.
82
00:03:25,901 --> 00:03:27,032
Ah. There are the guys.
83
00:03:28,295 --> 00:03:29,687
Ahoy, mateys!
84
00:03:29,731 --> 00:03:32,734
[GROWLING LIKE PIRATES]
85
00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:38,087
These wings are disgusting.
86
00:03:38,130 --> 00:03:39,784
What's the score of the game?
87
00:03:39,828 --> 00:03:43,919
Thirty-six to 24 to 40.
88
00:03:43,962 --> 00:03:46,835
Wow, this is
a high-scoring game.
89
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,318
So, what did you tell Suzanne
to get out of the house?
90
00:03:51,361 --> 00:03:53,407
I told her I was coming
to watch the game.
91
00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:56,366
I didn't. I told my wife I was
going to the grocery store.
92
00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:59,195
And on my home,
I'll be sure to stop
at the grocery store.
93
00:04:01,066 --> 00:04:03,808
Yeah, I told my wife
I was going to a strip club,
94
00:04:03,852 --> 00:04:05,854
but instead I came here.
95
00:04:07,290 --> 00:04:09,205
What is wrong with you, man?
96
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:10,641
I got an idea.
97
00:04:10,685 --> 00:04:12,687
Let's tell Treasure
that it's Nick's birthday
98
00:04:12,730 --> 00:04:15,951
and we'll get them to give him
one of their special birthday
celebrations.
99
00:04:15,994 --> 00:04:17,213
Love that.
100
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,433
What special birthday
celebration?
101
00:04:19,476 --> 00:04:22,000
Come on, man!
You never had a Booty birthday?
102
00:04:22,044 --> 00:04:24,133
No, and I don't want
a Booty birthday.
103
00:04:24,176 --> 00:04:25,482
I didn't know it was
your birthday, Nick.
104
00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:26,570
How old are you?
105
00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:28,355
Dude, I'm not...Oh, Treasure!
106
00:04:28,398 --> 00:04:30,574
This scallywag be having
a birthday.
107
00:04:31,183 --> 00:04:32,707
Come on. Guys, no.
108
00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:34,491
Someone has a birthday?
Ladies.No.
109
00:04:34,535 --> 00:04:36,232
Come on over here,
we got a birthday.
110
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:38,495
Happy birthday.Are you ready?
111
00:04:38,539 --> 00:04:41,150
No, I'm not.
It's not my birthday.
112
00:04:41,193 --> 00:04:43,370
[BOOTY MUSIC PLAYING]
113
00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:47,330
♪ Chicken wings, birthday cake
Let me see that booty shake
114
00:04:47,374 --> 00:04:50,942
♪ Chicken wings, birthday cake
Let me see that booty shake
115
00:04:50,986 --> 00:04:54,294
♪ Chicken wings, birthday cake
Let me see that booty shake
116
00:04:54,337 --> 00:04:56,208
♪ Booty birthday
Booty birthday
117
00:04:56,252 --> 00:04:57,906
♪ Booty birthday
Booty birthday
118
00:04:57,949 --> 00:05:01,866
♪ Booty birthday
Booty birthday
Booty birthday
119
00:05:01,910 --> 00:05:04,173
♪ Drop it, drop it
Drop it, drop it ♪
120
00:05:14,270 --> 00:05:16,838
Okay, Mom.
We finished all our chores.
121
00:05:16,881 --> 00:05:19,971
I cleaned up my room
and I took all the clothes
out of my hamper.
122
00:05:20,015 --> 00:05:23,932
Yep, and I made my bed
and unclogged the toilet.
123
00:05:23,975 --> 00:05:26,238
Kevin, aren't you the one
who clogged the toilet?
124
00:05:26,282 --> 00:05:27,762
Yeah, it was a good one!
125
00:05:29,677 --> 00:05:33,376
So, do we get
our allowances, now?
126
00:05:33,420 --> 00:05:37,511
Guys, I'm really proud of you
for doing those things, but no.
127
00:05:37,554 --> 00:05:40,383
So, I unclogged the toilet
for nothing?
128
00:05:40,427 --> 00:05:43,517
No, you unclogged the toilet
'cause that's nasty.
129
00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:46,737
So, what exactly do we
need to do to get
our allowance?
130
00:05:46,781 --> 00:05:48,435
You need to show
some initiative,
131
00:05:48,478 --> 00:05:50,088
and I'll pay you
for what it's worth.
132
00:05:50,132 --> 00:05:51,742
We are showing initiative.
133
00:05:51,786 --> 00:05:53,048
How?
134
00:05:53,091 --> 00:05:54,179
By trying to convince you
to give us money.
135
00:06:07,149 --> 00:06:09,934
I'm so glad you had
a good time today
with your friends.
136
00:06:09,978 --> 00:06:12,372
Where'd you guys
go anyway? No Hitter?
137
00:06:13,677 --> 00:06:16,463
No, I don't think so.
It was some other place.
138
00:06:17,725 --> 00:06:19,204
Was it The Scoreboard?
139
00:06:20,554 --> 00:06:22,686
No, I don't think so.
140
00:06:22,730 --> 00:06:25,385
Well, there's only
a few sports bars.
141
00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:26,821
You guys
were downtown,
right?
142
00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:29,476
Yeah, I think so.
143
00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:33,305
You think so?
144
00:06:33,349 --> 00:06:34,872
Were you or weren't you?
145
00:06:37,048 --> 00:06:39,181
I don't know.
Martin was driving.
146
00:06:39,224 --> 00:06:41,313
I was just out
having a good time.
147
00:06:43,011 --> 00:06:44,404
Nick.
148
00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:47,145
Were you or weren't you
downtown at a sports bar,
149
00:06:47,189 --> 00:06:48,625
watching the baseball game?
150
00:06:50,453 --> 00:06:51,672
I was.
151
00:06:53,325 --> 00:06:54,675
Well...
152
00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:58,592
You weren't at The Scoreboard.
153
00:06:58,635 --> 00:07:00,507
You weren't at No Hitter.
154
00:07:00,550 --> 00:07:01,725
So, where were you?
155
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:06,077
Dang. I don't remember
the name of it.
156
00:07:06,121 --> 00:07:10,473
Well, the only other place
that's open on Sundays
is Booty,
157
00:07:10,517 --> 00:07:12,388
and I know
you weren't at Booty.
158
00:07:16,218 --> 00:07:18,350
Which one
was that again?
159
00:07:18,394 --> 00:07:21,528
The one with all the girls
with the big booties
160
00:07:21,571 --> 00:07:23,617
dressed in pirate outfits.
161
00:07:28,143 --> 00:07:30,406
Come to think of it,
162
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,974
yeah, I think that's
where we were.
163
00:07:33,017 --> 00:07:38,109
You spent
six hours drinking,
164
00:07:38,153 --> 00:07:41,199
watching the game
with your friends at Booty?
165
00:07:41,243 --> 00:07:43,158
Baby, you told me to go out
and have a good time.
166
00:07:43,201 --> 00:07:44,725
Not when it's at Booty!
167
00:07:44,768 --> 00:07:46,596
Baby, it's not what you think.
168
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,424
Look, they just have
the most TVs,
169
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,513
the cheapest beer,
and the best wings.
170
00:07:50,557 --> 00:07:52,907
You lied to me!No, I didn't!
171
00:07:52,950 --> 00:07:54,865
Look, baby, I didn't even know
that's where we were going
172
00:07:54,909 --> 00:07:56,867
until we got there.
173
00:07:56,911 --> 00:08:00,392
Okay, so why didn't you
tell me that's where
you were when you got home?
174
00:08:00,436 --> 00:08:03,526
Because it didn't come up.
And when it did, I told you.
175
00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:05,485
So, what's the problem?
176
00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:08,226
You really don't know
what the problem is?
177
00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:09,489
No, I don't.
178
00:08:10,838 --> 00:08:13,841
Well, you are about
to find out.
179
00:08:30,597 --> 00:08:32,555
Here's some more
orange juice
for you, Mom.
180
00:08:32,599 --> 00:08:34,514
Thank you, Lindsey.
181
00:08:34,557 --> 00:08:36,559
Let me get that
for you, Mom.
182
00:08:36,603 --> 00:08:38,039
Thank you, Kevin.
183
00:08:38,082 --> 00:08:40,432
And we also got up extra early
and washed your car
184
00:08:40,476 --> 00:08:42,086
and swept up the front yard.
185
00:08:42,130 --> 00:08:44,175
So, can we have
our allowances now?
186
00:08:44,654 --> 00:08:45,916
No.
187
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,701
What?How come?
188
00:08:47,744 --> 00:08:50,181
Well, because I noticed
that your beds aren't made,
189
00:08:50,225 --> 00:08:52,096
and Lindsey, you have
clothes all over the floor,
190
00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:54,403
and Kevin,
the toilet is backed up again.
191
00:08:55,926 --> 00:08:57,537
Just because you wake up early
192
00:08:57,580 --> 00:08:59,669
and wash my car
and clean the front yard
193
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:03,107
doesn't mean you get to
neglect your everyday chores.
194
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:05,066
So, I washed your car
for nothing?
195
00:09:05,109 --> 00:09:07,329
You didn't wash my car
for nothing.
196
00:09:07,372 --> 00:09:10,245
Now, both of you go upstairs
and clean your rooms.
197
00:09:10,288 --> 00:09:11,725
LINDSEY: Hi, Nick.Hey.
198
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:16,338
Where's my breakfast?
199
00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:22,126
Why don't you
eat at Booty, since you
love their food so much.
200
00:09:24,172 --> 00:09:26,174
Where's your breakfast?
[SCOFFS]
201
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:28,916
That's ridiculous.
202
00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:30,482
They don't even
serve breakfast.
203
00:09:40,667 --> 00:09:43,278
Let me ask you something, Gigi.
204
00:09:43,321 --> 00:09:44,932
What do you do
when you find out
205
00:09:44,975 --> 00:09:47,674
a man's been withholding
information from you?
206
00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:52,330
Well, it depends
on two things...
207
00:09:52,374 --> 00:09:55,333
The kind of information,
and how I found out.
208
00:09:55,377 --> 00:09:58,554
Like this one time
I found out not only
was this guy cheating on me,
209
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,251
but he was lying
about his money.
210
00:10:00,295 --> 00:10:03,254
How'd you find out?The other woman told me.
211
00:10:03,298 --> 00:10:05,430
He and I had
just come back
from Aruba,
212
00:10:05,474 --> 00:10:08,433
and she said he had
just taken her to Aruba.
213
00:10:08,477 --> 00:10:11,045
And I was gonna stay
with him,
until I found out
214
00:10:11,088 --> 00:10:12,655
where he was getting
his money from.
215
00:10:12,699 --> 00:10:14,526
Where?From her.
216
00:10:14,570 --> 00:10:16,616
If I'd known that,
I would have gone
to Aruba with her
217
00:10:16,659 --> 00:10:19,009
and we both could have
got a man.
218
00:10:19,053 --> 00:10:20,663
Does that help?
219
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:21,969
Not really.Oh.
220
00:10:24,014 --> 00:10:25,668
Is Nick
hiding something
from you?
221
00:10:26,887 --> 00:10:28,976
Well, yesterday, he went
to watch baseball
222
00:10:29,019 --> 00:10:31,195
for six hours
with his friends
at Booty.
223
00:10:31,239 --> 00:10:33,676
Booty? I love Booty!
224
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,374
You do?I do! It's so much fun.
225
00:10:36,418 --> 00:10:37,854
How'd you find out?
226
00:10:37,898 --> 00:10:39,726
I asked him,
and he admitted he went.
227
00:10:42,380 --> 00:10:45,296
You asked him a question,
and he could've lied,
228
00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:47,690
but he told you the truth,
and now you're mad at him?
229
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:49,083
Yes.
230
00:10:49,126 --> 00:10:50,693
I can see that.
231
00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:53,609
[BOOTY MUSIC PLAYING]
232
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,480
♪ Hit it, hit it,
Hit it, hit it
233
00:10:57,004 --> 00:10:58,658
♪ Chicken wings, birthday cake
234
00:10:58,701 --> 00:11:00,616
♪ Do that booty
birthday shake ♪
235
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:01,661
[MUSIC STOPS]
236
00:11:05,621 --> 00:11:07,884
We need to
talk about Booty.
237
00:11:07,928 --> 00:11:11,061
Suzanne, I still don't know
what the big deal is.
238
00:11:11,105 --> 00:11:14,325
Look, it's just a fun place
where guys go to watch games.
239
00:11:14,369 --> 00:11:15,718
SUZANNE: Mmm-hmm.
240
00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:17,415
So, who won the game?
241
00:11:17,459 --> 00:11:19,504
The, um...
242
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,856
And that's why
it's a big deal.
243
00:11:22,899 --> 00:11:26,294
Oh, so now, I got to tell you
about every place I go
to do everything I do?
244
00:11:26,337 --> 00:11:27,687
When you go grocery shopping,
245
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,558
I don't know exactly
where you go.
246
00:11:29,601 --> 00:11:31,865
Because the guys
bagging my groceries
247
00:11:31,908 --> 00:11:33,736
aren't walking around
with oily pecs,
248
00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:36,260
in jock straps,
talking about paper or plastic.
249
00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:40,656
"Helicopter,
helicopter, hey."
250
00:11:45,226 --> 00:11:46,444
Are you done?
251
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,100
Look, Suzanne,
it's not like that.
252
00:11:50,144 --> 00:11:51,449
Okay, you're overreacting.
253
00:11:51,493 --> 00:11:53,887
I told you, they have
the best wings.
254
00:11:53,930 --> 00:11:56,193
All right,
all kinds of people go there.
255
00:11:56,237 --> 00:11:57,847
Families, everybody.Really?
256
00:11:58,239 --> 00:11:59,283
Really.
257
00:11:59,327 --> 00:12:00,981
Okay, fine.
I believe you.
258
00:12:01,546 --> 00:12:03,157
Thank you.
259
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:04,767
So, tonight, you, me
and the kids are gonna
eat at Booty.
260
00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:07,378
Excuse me?
261
00:12:07,422 --> 00:12:08,684
We're gonna order the wings.
262
00:12:09,859 --> 00:12:11,426
And you can turn
your music back on.
263
00:12:19,826 --> 00:12:21,523
So, you sure
you wanna do this?
264
00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:24,831
Yep, I really wanna
taste those wings.
265
00:12:29,574 --> 00:12:31,315
I can't believe we're really
gonna eat there.
266
00:12:31,359 --> 00:12:34,405
Me neither. This is awesome!
I've always wanted to go there.
267
00:12:34,449 --> 00:12:35,798
For what?
268
00:12:35,842 --> 00:12:37,104
It's food served by pirates!
269
00:12:38,279 --> 00:12:40,934
Yeah. In booty shorts.
270
00:12:52,728 --> 00:12:54,948
Well, here we are.
Just like you wanted.
271
00:12:56,384 --> 00:12:58,255
Whoa. Look at
the size of those jugs!
272
00:12:58,299 --> 00:13:01,171
Kevin, that is no way
to talk about a woman.
273
00:13:01,215 --> 00:13:02,999
He's talking about
the pitchers of beer.
274
00:13:03,521 --> 00:13:05,567
SUZANNE: Oh.
275
00:13:05,610 --> 00:13:07,874
Whoa! Look how big
that booty is!
276
00:13:09,397 --> 00:13:11,834
He's talking about
the treasure chest
by the door.
277
00:13:11,878 --> 00:13:13,314
No, I'm not.
278
00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:16,317
This place is tacky.
Are we really gonna eat here?
279
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:17,622
Yes, we are.
280
00:13:17,666 --> 00:13:19,973
I'm doing this to prove
a point to your father.
281
00:13:20,016 --> 00:13:23,977
What point? That he has
no taste in food?
282
00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:27,632
Hey, Nick! How you doin'?
How's it goin'?Hey. Treasure?
283
00:13:27,676 --> 00:13:29,547
Yes.I'm Suzanne. I'm Nick's wife.
284
00:13:29,591 --> 00:13:31,549
Oh, Suzanne.
Beautiful.
285
00:13:31,593 --> 00:13:32,855
Thank you.I didn't know
you were married, Nick.
286
00:13:32,899 --> 00:13:34,465
That's great.
287
00:13:34,509 --> 00:13:36,772
Well, you have
your beautiful kids with you.Thank you.
288
00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:38,165
Okay, so what can I
get you to order?
289
00:13:38,208 --> 00:13:41,472
We have heard so much
about those wings.
290
00:13:41,516 --> 00:13:43,866
Those wings. So, how about
I bring you some over?
291
00:13:43,910 --> 00:13:46,129
Great.All right, birthday boy.
I'll be right back.
292
00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:49,132
Birthday boy?
293
00:13:50,177 --> 00:13:52,875
Oh, I almost forgot.
294
00:13:52,919 --> 00:13:54,746
Martin and the guys
thought it'd be funny
295
00:13:54,790 --> 00:13:57,227
if they told the waitresses
it was my birthday.
296
00:13:57,271 --> 00:14:00,448
Oh, and what type of
celebration do they do?
297
00:14:01,057 --> 00:14:02,667
Oh...
298
00:14:02,711 --> 00:14:04,887
You just get some free wings
and they sing "Happy Birthday."
299
00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:06,584
It's no big deal.
300
00:14:06,628 --> 00:14:09,805
All right, ladies. Listen up!
We got another birthday.
301
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:11,894
Booty birthday, come on.
302
00:14:11,938 --> 00:14:13,243
[BOOTY MUSIC PLAYING]
303
00:14:13,287 --> 00:14:15,506
♪ Hit it, hit it
Hit it, hit it
304
00:14:15,550 --> 00:14:20,337
♪ Chicken wings, birthday cake
Do that booty birthday shake ♪
305
00:14:23,297 --> 00:14:24,646
Kevin, eyes front.
306
00:14:36,266 --> 00:14:37,877
[VIDEO GAME PLAYING]
307
00:14:39,617 --> 00:14:41,793
Sorry, buddy.
You got yourself
into this one.
308
00:14:42,794 --> 00:14:44,187
What are you talking about?
309
00:14:44,231 --> 00:14:45,972
You're the one that dragged
me down there!
310
00:14:46,015 --> 00:14:48,931
Yeah, but I didn't
tell you to turn it into
a family field trip.
311
00:14:48,975 --> 00:14:52,282
It doesn't matter.
She would've gotten
mad, anyway.
312
00:14:52,326 --> 00:14:55,372
Yes, but if you had told her,
she would've gotten mad
ahead of time,
313
00:14:55,416 --> 00:14:56,939
which is a lot better.
314
00:14:56,983 --> 00:14:58,462
None of this wouldn't
have happened
315
00:14:58,506 --> 00:15:00,595
if she hadn't seen
that stupid birthday
celebration.
316
00:15:02,379 --> 00:15:05,687
Nick, please tell me
she did not witness
a Booty birthday.
317
00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:08,559
She witnessed a Booty birthday.
318
00:15:09,386 --> 00:15:11,475
Oh, come on, man!
319
00:15:11,519 --> 00:15:13,434
Listen, you say
you want my help,
320
00:15:13,477 --> 00:15:15,827
but then you won't even tell me
everything that happened.
321
00:15:15,871 --> 00:15:19,831
You're like Keyser Soze,
just doling out little
pieces of information,
322
00:15:19,875 --> 00:15:21,007
hoping that I'll figure it out
323
00:15:21,050 --> 00:15:22,617
like I'm The Closer
or something.
324
00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:25,446
Do I look like
Kyra Sedgwick to you?
325
00:15:25,489 --> 00:15:27,665
You want my advice?
Here it is.
326
00:15:27,709 --> 00:15:29,058
Be Nick. Okay?
327
00:15:29,102 --> 00:15:30,886
Don't be some
phony acting Nick
328
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,888
who thinks he can do
whatever he wants,
even though he's married.
329
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,890
Because if your wife
is mad at you,
330
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,370
and you were with me,
331
00:15:36,413 --> 00:15:38,763
it's only a matter of time
before I start catching heat.
332
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:40,722
And if I wanted some wife
to be mad at me,
333
00:15:40,765 --> 00:15:42,811
I'd go to Russia
and I'd buy one of my own.
334
00:15:53,039 --> 00:15:55,345
Okay, Mom,
we finished everything.
335
00:15:55,389 --> 00:15:57,521
So, can we have
our allowances now?
336
00:15:57,565 --> 00:15:59,262
Well, I guess
you guys have earned it.
337
00:15:59,306 --> 00:16:01,003
Yes!Yes!
338
00:16:01,047 --> 00:16:03,049
All right, Kevin, go get
my purse, please.
339
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:10,143
Thank you.
340
00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:12,145
KEVIN: Fifty dollars.
341
00:16:12,188 --> 00:16:14,321
Okay, here you go.
Five dollars each.
342
00:16:15,931 --> 00:16:17,019
Five dollars?
343
00:16:17,063 --> 00:16:18,629
That's it?
344
00:16:18,673 --> 00:16:21,023
If we'd known
we were only gonna
get paid five dollars,
345
00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:22,807
we would've never did
any of this stuff.
346
00:16:22,851 --> 00:16:26,550
Which is exactly why
I didn't tell you I was
giving you $5.
347
00:16:26,594 --> 00:16:28,552
Okay. I'm going to
go back upstairs,
348
00:16:28,596 --> 00:16:30,163
take all my clothes
out of my hamper
349
00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:31,686
and throw them back down
on the floor.
350
00:16:31,729 --> 00:16:33,253
I'm gonna go re-clog
the toilet.
351
00:16:34,036 --> 00:16:36,125
Freeze!
352
00:16:36,169 --> 00:16:39,215
So, just because
I don't give in
to your demands,
353
00:16:39,259 --> 00:16:41,739
you're gonna go
destroy my house?
354
00:16:41,783 --> 00:16:43,219
Who are you, the Taliban?
355
00:16:43,263 --> 00:16:45,221
I do not negotiate
with terrorists.
356
00:16:45,265 --> 00:16:46,570
So, here is the deal.
357
00:16:46,614 --> 00:16:49,312
You're either going to
take the $5,
358
00:16:49,356 --> 00:16:51,097
or you're going to
take nothing.
359
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:53,186
We'll take it.
360
00:16:53,229 --> 00:16:54,535
And you'll be
happy about it.
361
00:16:55,753 --> 00:16:57,059
Thank you.
362
00:17:01,890 --> 00:17:03,631
Ya'll better
not mess up
my house.
363
00:17:11,595 --> 00:17:13,467
[BOOTY SONG PLAYING]
364
00:17:13,510 --> 00:17:17,514
♪ Chicken wings, birthday cake
Do that booty birthday shake
365
00:17:19,255 --> 00:17:22,954
♪ Yeah, baby, yeah
Yeah, baby, yeah
366
00:17:22,998 --> 00:17:26,001
♪ Yeah, baby, yeah
Yeah, baby, yeah ♪
367
00:17:30,832 --> 00:17:32,312
[MUSIC STOPS]
368
00:17:34,183 --> 00:17:36,664
Nick. Can we have,
like, 20 bucks each?
369
00:17:36,707 --> 00:17:38,013
Like, no.
370
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,623
Didn't your mother
give you
your allowance?
371
00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:41,277
Yeah, but it was
only five bucks.
372
00:17:41,321 --> 00:17:43,758
And a full day at the mall's
gonna cost me at least a 20.
373
00:17:43,801 --> 00:17:45,194
Well, why don't you
take that five bucks
374
00:17:45,238 --> 00:17:46,761
and spend a quarter day
at the mall?
375
00:17:46,804 --> 00:17:48,850
Or you can save
that five bucks
and keep doing work
376
00:17:48,893 --> 00:17:50,417
until you have the money
you need.
377
00:17:50,460 --> 00:17:52,288
That's the lesson your mom's
trying to teach you.
378
00:17:52,332 --> 00:17:55,639
We don't want lessons.
We want money.
379
00:17:55,683 --> 00:17:57,076
Do you want to
live to spend it?
380
00:17:57,728 --> 00:17:58,990
Sorry.
381
00:17:59,034 --> 00:18:00,122
What do you need the money for?
382
00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:01,297
I don't know.
383
00:18:01,341 --> 00:18:03,473
Stuff.Stuff?
384
00:18:03,517 --> 00:18:05,606
You guys are pulling
your hair out because
you want money,
385
00:18:05,649 --> 00:18:07,129
and you don't even know
what you want it for?
386
00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:08,609
We want mad money.
387
00:18:08,652 --> 00:18:10,045
I'm not giving you guys money
388
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:12,134
just so
you can have it.
I'm sorry.
389
00:18:12,178 --> 00:18:13,222
We forgive you.
390
00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:15,703
Now, can we have some money?
391
00:18:15,746 --> 00:18:17,966
No. Do some work.
392
00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:20,664
Fine. Maybe I'll get
a job at Booty.
393
00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:34,374
Suzanne,
what are you
afraid of?
394
00:18:34,417 --> 00:18:38,160
That he's gonna leave you
for a girl with a big booty
and a bucket of wings?
395
00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:39,727
I don't know.
396
00:18:39,770 --> 00:18:43,731
Let me tell you this.
Big booty is unavoidable.
397
00:18:43,774 --> 00:18:45,472
It's at the park.
398
00:18:45,515 --> 00:18:48,866
It's at the grocery store.
It's even at church.
399
00:18:48,910 --> 00:18:51,695
You can't hide from big booty.
400
00:18:51,739 --> 00:18:54,394
Big booty, it's everywhere.
401
00:18:55,351 --> 00:18:57,658
I know that booty
is everywhere.
402
00:18:57,701 --> 00:18:59,703
I don't need him
to pretend it's not.
403
00:18:59,747 --> 00:19:01,183
But if he's gonna go there,
404
00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:03,577
I just want to
know about it.
That's all.
405
00:19:03,620 --> 00:19:05,361
Well, have you tried
telling him that?
406
00:19:07,450 --> 00:19:09,060
I mean, come on.You're good.
407
00:19:09,104 --> 00:19:10,453
Thank you.
408
00:19:20,246 --> 00:19:22,552
Man, I don't know how you do it.
409
00:19:22,596 --> 00:19:24,511
I wish I was more like you.
410
00:19:24,554 --> 00:19:27,166
Every time you get in trouble,
you just blurt out the truth.
411
00:19:28,471 --> 00:19:30,821
They always say the cover-up
is worse than the crime.
412
00:19:34,042 --> 00:19:35,435
Hey, baby.SUZANNE: Hey.
413
00:19:36,262 --> 00:19:38,786
I just ran into the kids.
414
00:19:38,829 --> 00:19:41,092
Thank you
for backing me up.
415
00:19:41,136 --> 00:19:44,226
Well, you're right.
You're teaching them
a valuable lesson.
416
00:19:44,270 --> 00:19:46,272
I'm trying to.
417
00:19:46,315 --> 00:19:49,405
You know,
you could've just told me
you were at Booty.
418
00:19:49,449 --> 00:19:51,320
I was afraid
you would have
gotten mad.
419
00:19:51,364 --> 00:19:52,843
That's right.
I would have.
420
00:19:52,887 --> 00:19:54,410
Then, what am I
supposed to do?
421
00:19:54,454 --> 00:19:56,847
You're supposed to get used
to me getting mad at things.
422
00:19:56,891 --> 00:19:59,502
Great.No, but I would've
gotten over it.
423
00:19:59,546 --> 00:20:02,070
I don't understand
why you even want to go there.
424
00:20:02,113 --> 00:20:03,332
Okay, I understand.
425
00:20:03,376 --> 00:20:05,943
Look, it's not even that
I want to go to Booty.
426
00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:07,771
It's just that
I don't like knowing
427
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:10,644
there are places
I might want to go
and can't.
428
00:20:10,687 --> 00:20:12,472
Nick, I don't care
where you go.
429
00:20:12,515 --> 00:20:14,082
I just care about
what you do.
430
00:20:14,691 --> 00:20:16,302
I'll tell you what.
431
00:20:16,345 --> 00:20:18,565
You tell me beforehand,
and you can go to Booty
432
00:20:18,608 --> 00:20:20,262
anytime you want.
433
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:22,830
Except your actual birthday.
434
00:20:22,873 --> 00:20:25,093
Why? What do you think
I might do?
435
00:20:25,136 --> 00:20:26,573
End up in the hospital,
436
00:20:26,616 --> 00:20:29,271
if I even think you did
something besides eat wings.
437
00:20:31,186 --> 00:20:35,277
I have all the wings
I need right here.
438
00:20:35,321 --> 00:20:37,932
Oh. I forgot.
I got you something.
439
00:20:37,975 --> 00:20:40,326
You got me something?Yeah.
440
00:20:40,369 --> 00:20:43,851
It's for me.
But it's mostly for you.
441
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:47,289
Oh.
442
00:20:48,638 --> 00:20:50,466
Well, first we'll dive
into these
443
00:20:50,510 --> 00:20:53,034
and then we'll dive
into those.
444
00:20:53,077 --> 00:20:54,209
[SINGING BOOTY SONG]
445
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:55,602
♪ Don't stop
446
00:20:55,645 --> 00:20:57,647
[BOTH VOCALIZING]
447
00:20:57,691 --> 00:20:59,954
♪ Booty, booty, ooh, ooh
448
00:21:02,086 --> 00:21:04,088
[CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
33569
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