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1
00:00:03,742 --> 00:00:06,310
Ma, I've been married
six months now.
2
00:00:06,354 --> 00:00:10,053
Don't you think it's time
you start bonding
with your grandchildren?
3
00:00:10,097 --> 00:00:12,099
What do you mean,
"what grandchildren"?
4
00:00:12,142 --> 00:00:13,274
Kevin and Lindsey,
5
00:00:13,317 --> 00:00:14,927
the children
of the woman I married.
6
00:00:16,277 --> 00:00:17,321
Suzanne.
7
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,107
Kevin and Lindsey.
8
00:00:20,890 --> 00:00:22,631
Lindsey's the girl.
9
00:00:22,674 --> 00:00:26,113
Look, that's why you need
to spend more time with them.
10
00:00:26,156 --> 00:00:29,246
Besides, Suzanne is working,
I'm working.
11
00:00:29,290 --> 00:00:31,379
This way,
they'll be with family.
12
00:00:31,422 --> 00:00:33,337
You heard me. I said family.
13
00:00:34,469 --> 00:00:35,731
We'll see you tomorrow.
14
00:00:40,518 --> 00:00:42,303
Why do we have to
hang out with her?
15
00:00:44,435 --> 00:00:45,958
She hates us.
16
00:00:46,002 --> 00:00:47,786
She hardly even
knows you guys.
17
00:00:47,830 --> 00:00:49,092
She can't wait to see you.
18
00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:51,138
You didn't say
she doesn't hate us.
19
00:00:51,181 --> 00:00:53,792
She just needs a chance
to get to know you.
20
00:00:53,836 --> 00:00:56,230
She hasn't spent
a lot of time around kids.
21
00:00:56,273 --> 00:00:57,448
Didn't she raise you?
22
00:00:58,275 --> 00:00:59,494
Like I said,
23
00:00:59,537 --> 00:01:01,583
she hasn't spent
a lot of time around kids.
24
00:01:01,626 --> 00:01:03,367
Look, just do me a favor.
25
00:01:03,411 --> 00:01:05,717
Don't call her
"Grandma" or "Granny,"
26
00:01:05,761 --> 00:01:08,111
or "Mammy," "Nana,"
nothing like that.
27
00:01:08,155 --> 00:01:10,940
I'm just gonna call her
Mrs. Persons.
28
00:01:10,983 --> 00:01:12,333
Call her Marilyn.
29
00:01:12,376 --> 00:01:14,248
Once she gets to know you,
she's gonna love you.
30
00:01:14,291 --> 00:01:16,250
That's what they said
to Britney Spears' kids.
31
00:01:19,122 --> 00:01:20,123
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
32
00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:22,125
♪ Are we there yet?
33
00:01:22,169 --> 00:01:25,433
♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me
34
00:01:25,476 --> 00:01:27,304
♪ Tell me, are we there yet?
35
00:01:27,348 --> 00:01:29,089
♪ Are we there yet?
36
00:01:39,490 --> 00:01:41,449
Hey, baby. You okay?
37
00:01:41,797 --> 00:01:43,103
No.
38
00:01:43,146 --> 00:01:44,321
I've got a problem.
39
00:01:44,365 --> 00:01:45,888
What's up?
40
00:01:45,931 --> 00:01:48,760
I just found out
I have three paid sick days,
41
00:01:48,804 --> 00:01:51,154
and I have to take them now
or lose them.
42
00:01:51,198 --> 00:01:52,982
How is this a problem?
43
00:01:53,025 --> 00:01:55,245
I'm a professional
event planner.
44
00:01:55,289 --> 00:01:57,421
I don't do unplanned well.
45
00:01:57,465 --> 00:01:59,554
Why don't you just
plan on doing nothing?
46
00:01:59,597 --> 00:02:00,990
Why don't you
just file that under
47
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:02,296
"you don't know
what you're talking about?"
48
00:02:03,601 --> 00:02:04,689
Come here.
49
00:02:06,909 --> 00:02:08,128
Sit down right here.
50
00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:13,437
You could just do this
for three days.
51
00:02:13,481 --> 00:02:17,528
ESPN, ESPN2,
ESPN Classic,
ESPN Extreme.
52
00:02:17,572 --> 00:02:19,791
I'll just go in to work.
[EXHALES]
53
00:02:19,835 --> 00:02:21,576
Why?
54
00:02:21,619 --> 00:02:23,578
Look, you're the one
always complaining
55
00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:26,146
about how tired
and overworked you are.
56
00:02:27,059 --> 00:02:28,670
That was just last night.
57
00:02:30,715 --> 00:02:33,196
Okay, well, I suppose
it could be fun.
58
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,677
You and me, we could go
down to Pike's Place,
59
00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:38,070
grab some breakfast,
do some shopping.
60
00:02:38,114 --> 00:02:40,290
Oh, that sounds great, baby.
61
00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:41,509
Good. We'll do it.
62
00:02:41,552 --> 00:02:43,728
I can't. You're the one
with the three days.
63
00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:44,816
I got to work.
64
00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:47,689
Use this as your "me" time.
65
00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:50,605
[SIGHS]
66
00:02:50,648 --> 00:02:53,825
Okay, well, maybe I can spend
some time with the kids.
67
00:02:53,869 --> 00:02:56,959
Go down to Pike's Place,
grab some breakfast,
do some shopping.
68
00:02:57,002 --> 00:02:59,048
Oh, that sounds
nice, baby.
69
00:02:59,091 --> 00:03:00,615
Good.Not good.
70
00:03:00,658 --> 00:03:02,617
They're spending
the day with my mother.
71
00:03:02,660 --> 00:03:04,619
Why? She hates them.
72
00:03:04,662 --> 00:03:06,142
KEVIN AND LINDSEY: Told you!
73
00:03:11,278 --> 00:03:12,801
[EXASPERATED SIGH]
74
00:03:13,584 --> 00:03:14,933
[EXHALES]
75
00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:16,457
Okay, kids, remember,
76
00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:19,155
no touching anything
at Grandma's house.
77
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:21,026
Oh, they won't be going
anywhere near my house.
78
00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:22,550
I just laid white carpet.
79
00:03:22,593 --> 00:03:24,334
We are going to the mall.
80
00:03:24,378 --> 00:03:25,640
Go stand by the car.
81
00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:27,859
BOTH: Bye, Mom.
82
00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:29,165
Bye, sweethearts.
83
00:03:31,776 --> 00:03:33,648
Sounds like a lot of fun.Hmm.
84
00:03:33,691 --> 00:03:36,390
Uh, Marilyn, these are
just a few important numbers
85
00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:37,739
we think you should have.
86
00:03:37,782 --> 00:03:39,871
My cell, Nick's cell,
home phone, pediatrician...
87
00:03:39,915 --> 00:03:42,396
Did you not hear me say
we are going to the mall?
88
00:03:42,439 --> 00:03:46,617
I did, Marilyn,
but bad things
can happen there too.
89
00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:48,576
Um, for the kids,
90
00:03:48,619 --> 00:03:51,970
no sugars before 12:00 noon
or after 3:00.
91
00:03:52,014 --> 00:03:53,842
Look, little bitty woman,
92
00:03:53,885 --> 00:03:57,976
if your kids do not know
how to eat by now,
I am not teaching them.
93
00:03:58,020 --> 00:04:01,197
Please make sure
that they wash their hands
for a full 15 seconds...
94
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:04,374
You do realize I managed
to raise your husband, right?
95
00:04:04,983 --> 00:04:06,289
Barely.
96
00:04:06,333 --> 00:04:08,160
Nick told me that
when he was five,
97
00:04:08,204 --> 00:04:10,598
you put him up for collateral
in a poker game.
98
00:04:10,641 --> 00:04:12,382
I had a full house,
kings high.
99
00:04:12,426 --> 00:04:13,949
Where was the risk in that?
100
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,995
No, they did not
touch my horn.
101
00:04:18,562 --> 00:04:20,085
I got a number for you.
102
00:04:23,001 --> 00:04:24,133
911?
103
00:04:24,176 --> 00:04:26,004
Yep, because if
your kids go missing,
104
00:04:26,048 --> 00:04:27,484
I am not looking for 'em.
105
00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:41,193
Mm, that was good.
106
00:04:41,237 --> 00:04:42,717
I can't wait till you have
another day off.
107
00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:45,502
Want anything else?
108
00:04:45,546 --> 00:04:47,243
Mm, I'm good.
109
00:04:48,113 --> 00:04:50,420
Mm. I got to go to work.
110
00:04:50,464 --> 00:04:51,552
Have a good day, baby.
111
00:04:56,383 --> 00:04:57,732
[EXHALES]
112
00:05:04,608 --> 00:05:06,349
[SOOTHING MUSIC PLAYING]
113
00:05:12,137 --> 00:05:13,530
Crap!
114
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:15,315
[SOOTHING MUSIC PLAYING]
115
00:05:18,883 --> 00:05:21,451
[LAUGHS TRIUMPHANTLY]
116
00:05:21,495 --> 00:05:24,367
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, boy.
117
00:05:24,411 --> 00:05:26,456
Hah! Hah!
118
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:30,634
[SOOTHING MUSIC PLAYING]
119
00:05:37,598 --> 00:05:40,122
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
120
00:05:47,782 --> 00:05:49,349
[EXHALES]
121
00:05:49,392 --> 00:05:51,220
[BALL THUDDING
ACROSS COURT ON TV]
122
00:05:51,263 --> 00:05:52,308
Tennis.
123
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,701
[INDISTINCT COMMENTARY ON TV]
124
00:05:53,744 --> 00:05:55,311
[BALL THUDDING RAPIDLY]
125
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:56,443
Ping-pong.
126
00:05:57,966 --> 00:05:59,010
[REMOTE CONTROL BEEPS]
127
00:05:59,054 --> 00:06:01,535
[WHOOSHING]Skateboarding.
128
00:06:02,449 --> 00:06:04,712
[ELECTRONIC LIGHTSABER
ZIPPING]
129
00:06:04,755 --> 00:06:06,540
[HOLLOW RUMBLING ON TV]
130
00:06:13,285 --> 00:06:14,678
I thought you were working.
131
00:06:15,897 --> 00:06:18,029
I am working.
132
00:06:18,073 --> 00:06:20,292
No, you're not.
You're fighting Count Dooku.
133
00:06:21,903 --> 00:06:25,559
No, I'm calibrating
the motion sensors
on the Wii mod
134
00:06:27,038 --> 00:06:28,562
by fighting Count Dooku.
135
00:06:28,605 --> 00:06:30,520
[WEAPONS FIRING ON TV]
136
00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:32,914
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
137
00:06:32,957 --> 00:06:35,307
[INDISTINCT VIDEO GAME SOUNDS]
138
00:06:35,351 --> 00:06:36,352
So...
139
00:06:37,222 --> 00:06:40,138
Uh, enjoying
your vacation, baby?
140
00:06:40,704 --> 00:06:42,097
No.
141
00:06:42,140 --> 00:06:44,752
I can't just sit around
the house and do nothing.
142
00:06:44,795 --> 00:06:46,057
Why don't you call Gigi?
143
00:06:46,101 --> 00:06:47,407
She's at work.[LIGHTSABER ZIPPING]
144
00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,147
You just killed Count Dooku.
145
00:06:49,713 --> 00:06:51,106
Sorry.
146
00:06:51,149 --> 00:06:52,412
It's okay.
147
00:06:52,455 --> 00:06:54,588
At least I know
the motion sensor's working.
148
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:55,676
So you're finished?
149
00:06:55,719 --> 00:06:57,199
No, I've got
three more of these.
150
00:06:57,242 --> 00:06:58,330
Oh.
151
00:06:58,374 --> 00:06:59,941
Why don't you go
see a movie?
152
00:06:59,984 --> 00:07:01,551
Nick, the only thing
more depressing
153
00:07:01,595 --> 00:07:02,987
than sitting at home by myself
154
00:07:03,031 --> 00:07:04,902
is going to a matinee
by myself.
155
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:07,122
Look, baby, I don't know
what to tell you,
156
00:07:07,165 --> 00:07:08,602
but I've got to go to work.
157
00:07:08,645 --> 00:07:11,169
I promised my client
I'd have this fixed by tonight.
158
00:07:11,213 --> 00:07:13,476
What kind of client
can't wait a day
for their Wii?
159
00:07:14,303 --> 00:07:15,739
A mother with two kids.
160
00:07:17,132 --> 00:07:20,004
Fine. Play with Count Dooku.
161
00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:34,279
Okay, people, here's how
it's gonna work.
162
00:07:34,323 --> 00:07:36,020
I'm gonna be at that bar
over there,
163
00:07:36,064 --> 00:07:38,240
catching up with my friends
Jack and coke.
164
00:07:38,283 --> 00:07:40,024
These are for you.
165
00:07:40,068 --> 00:07:41,939
They're prepaid cards.
166
00:07:41,983 --> 00:07:44,115
Really? How much is on them?
167
00:07:44,159 --> 00:07:46,030
That's for me to know
and you to find out.
168
00:07:46,074 --> 00:07:49,164
And when they're maxed out,
so are you.
169
00:07:49,207 --> 00:07:50,644
Thanks, Grandma.
170
00:07:50,687 --> 00:07:53,124
Say it again and see
what happens to you.
171
00:07:53,168 --> 00:07:54,822
What am I gonna do?
172
00:07:54,865 --> 00:07:57,868
Well, you are going
to be in that arcade
right over there.
173
00:07:57,912 --> 00:08:00,523
So I can just play
in the arcade the whole time?
174
00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:02,307
And I can go wherever
I want to in the mall?
175
00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:04,658
Yes, just be
back here by 3:00,
176
00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:06,094
and be smart.
177
00:08:06,137 --> 00:08:07,878
Watch out for pickpockets.
178
00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:10,577
What about
"no talking to strangers"?
179
00:08:10,620 --> 00:08:12,100
Yeah, that too.
180
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:14,537
What if I meet a overly
friendly guy with a puppy?
181
00:08:15,712 --> 00:08:17,453
Are you gonna be
a problem?
182
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,282
No, I just don't want to
end up on that show
with Chris Hansen.
183
00:08:20,325 --> 00:08:22,284
He spends a lot of time
on the internet.
184
00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:23,720
Here.
185
00:08:24,591 --> 00:08:26,157
Thanks, Grandma.
186
00:08:27,550 --> 00:08:28,725
I told you,
187
00:08:28,769 --> 00:08:30,771
I am not your grandmother.
188
00:08:30,814 --> 00:08:34,209
If anything, I'm your
step-grandmother.
189
00:08:34,252 --> 00:08:35,863
Nobody has
a step-grandmother.
190
00:08:36,385 --> 00:08:37,647
Exactly.
191
00:08:37,691 --> 00:08:38,996
Goodbye.
192
00:08:41,608 --> 00:08:43,435
Well, if I sound bitchy,
193
00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:46,134
it's because
I need the massage.
194
00:08:46,177 --> 00:08:48,179
Next month
doesn't work for me.
195
00:08:48,223 --> 00:08:50,486
Ugh! Thank you. Bye.
196
00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:53,533
How come
you're not at work?
197
00:08:53,576 --> 00:08:55,491
Because when I got there,
you weren't there.
198
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,928
I assist you, nobody else.
199
00:08:57,972 --> 00:09:01,628
Well, since you're
not doing anything,
let's hang out.
200
00:09:01,671 --> 00:09:03,368
Who said I wasn't
doing anything?
201
00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:05,762
My plane for Cabo
leaves in two hours.
202
00:09:05,806 --> 00:09:07,590
I just came to borrow
your espadrilles.
203
00:09:07,634 --> 00:09:09,853
Wha... Hold on.
You found out
this morning
204
00:09:09,897 --> 00:09:11,551
that you have
three days off,
205
00:09:11,594 --> 00:09:13,509
and you've already booked
a trip to Mexico?
206
00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:15,032
Booked it, comped it,
207
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:18,427
and my name is on the VIP
list for the P. Diddy party.
208
00:09:18,470 --> 00:09:20,777
Holla! [LAUGHS]
209
00:09:20,821 --> 00:09:23,345
I couldn't even get
an appointment at Aqua Spa.
210
00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:27,001
Oh, girl, you've got
to plan ahead for Aqua Spa.
211
00:09:27,044 --> 00:09:30,395
I couldn't plan ahead,
because I didn't know I was
gonna have the time off.
212
00:09:30,439 --> 00:09:32,093
Why don't you come
to Mexico with me?
213
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:33,181
I have kids.
214
00:09:33,224 --> 00:09:34,356
So does Mexico.
215
00:09:35,096 --> 00:09:36,619
My kids have plans.
216
00:09:36,663 --> 00:09:37,925
I don't know
what the problem is.
217
00:09:37,968 --> 00:09:40,318
You have time off,
and you have a man.
218
00:09:40,362 --> 00:09:43,583
Why don't you spend time
with your man?
219
00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:44,714
I tried to.
220
00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:45,846
He blew me off.
221
00:09:46,847 --> 00:09:47,848
Blew you off?
222
00:09:48,805 --> 00:09:49,980
You wanted to?Yes.
223
00:09:50,024 --> 00:09:51,112
And he said...No.
224
00:09:51,155 --> 00:09:52,200
Question.What?
225
00:09:52,243 --> 00:09:54,071
What were you wearing?This.
226
00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:55,116
[EXCLAIMS]
227
00:09:59,424 --> 00:10:01,078
That's your problem.
228
00:10:01,122 --> 00:10:04,429
And I think
you know the solution.
229
00:10:04,473 --> 00:10:05,648
[LAUGHS]
230
00:10:05,692 --> 00:10:06,954
Vamanos!
231
00:10:06,997 --> 00:10:08,172
[LAUGHING]
232
00:10:10,871 --> 00:10:12,786
One, two...
233
00:10:12,829 --> 00:10:14,962
One, two, three.
234
00:10:15,005 --> 00:10:16,746
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
235
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:21,533
♪ When the funk
between my toes
236
00:10:21,577 --> 00:10:23,318
♪ Hits your nose
237
00:10:23,361 --> 00:10:24,754
♪ Makes you go
238
00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:29,106
♪ Ow, ow, ow, ow!
239
00:10:29,150 --> 00:10:31,326
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
240
00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:41,292
Dude, come on.
241
00:10:41,336 --> 00:10:43,077
I'm not paying you guys
ten bucks apiece
242
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:45,209
just because
I don't need 30 bucks.
243
00:10:45,253 --> 00:10:46,471
We got work to do.
244
00:10:49,344 --> 00:10:50,475
Nick.
245
00:10:51,868 --> 00:10:52,956
Oh!
246
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,479
Whoo, honey, slow down.
247
00:10:54,523 --> 00:10:56,743
[LAUGHING] I didn't think
it was gonna work that fast.
248
00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:58,005
Baby?Huh?
249
00:10:58,048 --> 00:11:00,094
You don't understand.Understand what?
250
00:11:01,138 --> 00:11:03,184
[SUZANNE SCREAMING LOUDLY]
251
00:11:15,239 --> 00:11:16,501
NICK: Hey, guys.
252
00:11:16,545 --> 00:11:17,981
BOTH: Hey, Nick.
253
00:11:18,025 --> 00:11:19,069
How was it?
254
00:11:19,113 --> 00:11:21,071
It was a little
scary at first,
255
00:11:21,115 --> 00:11:23,334
but then she gave us money
and let us wander around
the mall by ourselves.
256
00:11:23,378 --> 00:11:26,686
Yep, turns out, she doesn't
hate us after all.
257
00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:30,080
Okay. Go wash up.
Mom fixed dinner.
258
00:11:30,124 --> 00:11:32,126
Cool.All right.
259
00:11:32,169 --> 00:11:34,781
Looks like you had
a good time with the kids, Ma.
260
00:11:34,824 --> 00:11:37,609
Don't tell me
what kind of time I had.
261
00:11:37,653 --> 00:11:39,176
I need a glass of water,
262
00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:40,961
and by "water,"
I mean vodka.
263
00:11:42,876 --> 00:11:44,094
What's wrong with you?
264
00:11:45,095 --> 00:11:47,010
Suzanne's been mad
at me all day.
265
00:11:47,054 --> 00:11:49,752
[SCOFFS] Well, if she
worked anywhere near
as hard as I did,
266
00:11:49,796 --> 00:11:51,580
I'd be mad too.
267
00:11:51,623 --> 00:11:52,842
That's just it.
268
00:11:52,886 --> 00:11:55,932
She didn't go to work.
She had the day off.
269
00:11:55,976 --> 00:11:58,500
I don't know what kind
of sick game you're playing,
270
00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:00,937
but the next time
these kids are at home
and their mother is at home,
271
00:12:00,981 --> 00:12:03,287
you let them stay home.
She's their family too.
272
00:12:03,331 --> 00:12:05,159
I didn't want
to change your plans.
273
00:12:05,202 --> 00:12:07,465
What is wrong with you, man?
274
00:12:07,509 --> 00:12:09,424
I had plenty of things
I could've been doing
275
00:12:09,467 --> 00:12:11,469
besides babysitting
those kids at the mall.
276
00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:14,429
Now, if they were
my grandkids, [SCOFFS]
it'd be a different story.
277
00:12:14,472 --> 00:12:16,431
They are your grandkids.
278
00:12:16,474 --> 00:12:17,998
You know what I mean.
279
00:12:18,781 --> 00:12:20,348
Boy, where is my vodka?
280
00:12:20,391 --> 00:12:21,392
I...
281
00:12:31,576 --> 00:12:33,796
I'm sorry about
what happened earlier.
282
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:36,407
No, you're not.
I'm sorry.
283
00:12:36,451 --> 00:12:37,757
They saw me naked.
284
00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:40,629
You act like it's my fault.
285
00:12:40,672 --> 00:12:42,805
I would never come down
to your job in my drawers
286
00:12:42,849 --> 00:12:44,024
and pose in the doorway
287
00:12:44,067 --> 00:12:45,852
and then get mad
when everybody stared at me.
288
00:12:47,592 --> 00:12:49,638
It is not the same thing.
289
00:12:49,681 --> 00:12:51,466
I don't work in the garage.
290
00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:55,078
Just because
my office is at home
291
00:12:55,122 --> 00:12:56,688
doesn't mean
I'm not at work.
292
00:12:56,732 --> 00:12:58,168
You don't see Michelle Obama
293
00:12:58,212 --> 00:12:59,866
waltzing around
the Oval Office
in her panties.
294
00:13:02,738 --> 00:13:06,394
So, now you're the President
of the United States?
295
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:08,396
You just have to pretend
I'm not here.
296
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:13,270
Now, my workday is over.
297
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:17,100
Get off of me.
298
00:13:17,144 --> 00:13:19,581
I'm still pretending
you're not here.
299
00:13:19,624 --> 00:13:22,279
Kevin, Lindsey,
dinner is ready!
300
00:13:32,855 --> 00:13:34,248
How come you're not eating?
301
00:13:34,291 --> 00:13:35,945
I'm not hungry.Me neither.
302
00:13:35,989 --> 00:13:37,164
We ate.
303
00:13:37,207 --> 00:13:39,035
I specifically asked
your grandmother
304
00:13:39,079 --> 00:13:40,907
not to feed you
past 3 o'clock.
305
00:13:40,950 --> 00:13:42,343
She didn't.
306
00:13:42,386 --> 00:13:44,562
But we ate everything
we wanted from 2:30 to 2:59.
307
00:13:46,564 --> 00:13:48,479
Well, that's just great.
308
00:13:48,523 --> 00:13:50,917
I sat around this house
all day long
309
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,006
and couldn't figure out
a thing to do,
310
00:13:53,049 --> 00:13:54,877
and the one thing
I came up with
311
00:13:54,921 --> 00:13:57,140
was cooking a nice dinner
for my family.
312
00:13:57,184 --> 00:13:58,750
And what does your mama do?
313
00:13:58,794 --> 00:14:00,317
She takes the kids to the mall
314
00:14:00,361 --> 00:14:03,103
and lobs a corn dog
right in the middle
of my plan.
315
00:14:03,146 --> 00:14:05,148
Nick, if this is
how you're going to treat me
316
00:14:05,192 --> 00:14:06,323
when I'm at home,
317
00:14:06,367 --> 00:14:07,934
why didn't you just
let me go to work?
318
00:14:09,283 --> 00:14:10,850
'Cause I love
your mashed potatoes?
319
00:14:16,029 --> 00:14:17,378
I'm telling you, Chuck,
320
00:14:17,421 --> 00:14:19,641
sometimes you can't win
for losing.
321
00:14:19,684 --> 00:14:22,035
If anybody knows that,
it's you.
322
00:14:22,078 --> 00:14:24,515
If I knew she
wanted to do that,
I would've come in late.
323
00:14:31,348 --> 00:14:33,176
[BEEPING]
324
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:37,877
Hey, Ma.
325
00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:40,096
It's Nick.
326
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:43,099
Yeah, I need you to keep
the kids tomorrow.
327
00:14:44,013 --> 00:14:45,362
Kevin and Lindsey.
328
00:14:49,453 --> 00:14:50,454
[KNOCK AT DOOR]
329
00:14:53,631 --> 00:14:54,981
[SIGHS]
330
00:14:55,024 --> 00:14:56,156
BOTH: Hey, Marilyn!
331
00:15:03,119 --> 00:15:04,904
So, what are we
doing today?
332
00:15:04,947 --> 00:15:06,862
I don't know, but you're
coming home hungry,
I can tell you that.
333
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:08,429
Can we please
go back to the mall?
334
00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:12,215
Sure, as long as you promise
not to talk to me until...
335
00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:14,130
As long as you promise
not to talk to me.
336
00:15:15,175 --> 00:15:17,046
Hey, Ma, you want
a cup of coffee?
337
00:15:17,090 --> 00:15:18,308
You got six hours to fix
338
00:15:18,352 --> 00:15:20,310
whatever's going on
with you and your wife.
339
00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:21,355
Come on, people.
340
00:15:23,574 --> 00:15:24,749
Thanks, Ma.
341
00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:37,110
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]
342
00:15:59,436 --> 00:16:02,265
Hey, baby.SUZANNE: What?
343
00:16:02,309 --> 00:16:04,572
Brush your teeth
and come downstairs.
344
00:16:04,615 --> 00:16:05,965
I made breakfast.
345
00:16:06,008 --> 00:16:07,792
I'm not hungry.
346
00:16:07,836 --> 00:16:09,707
I know you're upset, baby.
347
00:16:09,751 --> 00:16:11,971
Just, please, just come
downstairs, please?
348
00:16:12,928 --> 00:16:13,929
Fine.
349
00:16:16,366 --> 00:16:18,673
[ROMANTIC MUSIC CONTINUES]
350
00:16:46,918 --> 00:16:48,181
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
351
00:16:51,967 --> 00:16:54,230
It's 9 o'clock.
352
00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:56,189
Don't you have to be
at work, Mr. President?
353
00:16:57,668 --> 00:17:00,323
[HUMMING
HAIL TO THE CHIEF]
354
00:17:03,283 --> 00:17:04,371
[ROMANTIC MUSIC STOPS]
355
00:17:10,855 --> 00:17:12,074
Mm.
356
00:17:12,118 --> 00:17:14,076
My compliments
to the chef.
357
00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:15,556
You sure
you don't want any?
358
00:17:15,599 --> 00:17:16,600
Nah.
359
00:17:18,907 --> 00:17:20,691
Problem solved.
360
00:17:20,735 --> 00:17:22,650
Why can't I do that
with Suzanne?
361
00:17:22,693 --> 00:17:25,653
You can. You just got to treat
your woman like a hard drive.
362
00:17:25,696 --> 00:17:27,176
Do you want
to explain that?
363
00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,961
See, women possess
all the information
a man needs.
364
00:17:30,005 --> 00:17:32,355
You just have to
access the data.
365
00:17:32,399 --> 00:17:34,488
Access the data.
366
00:17:34,531 --> 00:17:36,751
Dude, it's almost 10:00 a.m.
Why didn't you say something?
367
00:17:36,794 --> 00:17:38,231
Because you have a watch on.
368
00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:40,755
Dude, I got a date
with this really hot chick.
369
00:17:40,798 --> 00:17:42,757
A date? It's 10:00 a.m.
370
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:44,106
Yeah, see, she works
the night shift,
371
00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:45,412
so we hit up this coffeehouse.
372
00:17:45,455 --> 00:17:46,935
But I'm telling you, man,
373
00:17:46,978 --> 00:17:48,806
you get a couple
mimosas in her,
she's good to go.
374
00:17:48,850 --> 00:17:50,721
It's like happy hour.
375
00:17:50,765 --> 00:17:52,854
Never underestimate
what a woman will do
376
00:17:52,897 --> 00:17:54,116
when she is brunch drunk.
377
00:17:54,986 --> 00:17:56,075
Brunch drunk.
378
00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:57,119
Oh, yeah.
379
00:17:57,163 --> 00:17:58,686
This woman plainly stated
380
00:17:58,729 --> 00:18:01,123
that she can't
sleep with a guy
who can't be on time.
381
00:18:01,167 --> 00:18:03,212
See, when women
tell me things,
382
00:18:03,256 --> 00:18:05,736
I believe them.
383
00:18:05,780 --> 00:18:07,173
[EXCLAIMS]
384
00:18:07,216 --> 00:18:09,523
See, Suzanne told you she
doesn't do unplanned well.
385
00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:11,351
She said she'd rather
just go to work.
386
00:18:11,394 --> 00:18:13,614
Now, was she lying? No.
387
00:18:13,657 --> 00:18:15,355
She told you
the truth about herself,
388
00:18:15,398 --> 00:18:17,487
and you convinced her
to do something different.
389
00:18:17,531 --> 00:18:19,837
Sorry, buddy.
This one's on you.
390
00:18:19,881 --> 00:18:22,057
But if it's any consolation,
391
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,015
those were
some kick-ass waffles.
392
00:18:29,412 --> 00:18:30,848
[INDISTINCT CHATTER ON TV]
393
00:18:30,892 --> 00:18:32,720
MAN: [ON TV] We realized
a long time ago,
394
00:18:32,763 --> 00:18:34,504
that what you make people feel
395
00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:37,333
is just as important
as what you make...
396
00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:40,597
It's noon. How come
you're not at work?
397
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:42,382
Lunch.
398
00:18:42,425 --> 00:18:43,905
I give myself 50 minutes.
399
00:18:46,168 --> 00:18:47,648
I'm sorry.
400
00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:49,345
What are you sorry for?
401
00:18:49,389 --> 00:18:50,825
Whatever made you mad.
402
00:18:51,565 --> 00:18:53,219
You know, I do work hard,
403
00:18:53,262 --> 00:18:55,221
even though it may not
seem like it to you.
404
00:18:55,830 --> 00:18:57,179
No, no.
405
00:18:57,223 --> 00:18:58,963
Honey, I understand.
406
00:18:59,007 --> 00:19:02,097
Count Dooku is
a menace to society
and needs to be dealt with.
407
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:04,795
The Empire is not
gonna defeat itself.
408
00:19:08,234 --> 00:19:09,235
Honey,
409
00:19:10,888 --> 00:19:14,065
I'm glad that you have
a job that you love.
410
00:19:14,109 --> 00:19:16,546
I guess I just wanted
to feel more important.
411
00:19:17,373 --> 00:19:19,245
Of course you are.
412
00:19:19,288 --> 00:19:20,333
You know that.
413
00:19:23,684 --> 00:19:26,513
You never said what
you were sorry for.
414
00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:29,516
I tried to make you do
what I would do
if I had a few days off
415
00:19:29,559 --> 00:19:31,431
instead of listening to you.
416
00:19:31,474 --> 00:19:33,781
I want you to respect
the way I operate,
417
00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:35,826
so I should respect
the way you operate.
418
00:19:37,393 --> 00:19:38,568
I like that.
419
00:19:39,874 --> 00:19:41,267
And I love you.
420
00:19:41,310 --> 00:19:43,530
I love you too, baby.
421
00:19:43,573 --> 00:19:46,141
MARILYN: Anybody home?
Because these kids are.
422
00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:49,623
NICK: Damn.[SIGHS]
423
00:19:52,408 --> 00:19:55,411
What happened?
Why are you home so early?
424
00:19:55,455 --> 00:19:57,761
Because these are
your kids, not mine.
425
00:19:57,805 --> 00:19:59,502
But you said you'd
give me till 3:00.
426
00:19:59,546 --> 00:20:03,027
Well, my nerves
only gave me till now.
427
00:20:03,071 --> 00:20:06,509
Ma, I never asked you
for anything, right?
428
00:20:06,553 --> 00:20:08,990
Wrong. You asked me
to take care of your kids
429
00:20:09,033 --> 00:20:10,426
two days in a row.
430
00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:11,732
I meant before that.
431
00:20:11,775 --> 00:20:13,690
Wait, don't try
to guilt-trip me.
432
00:20:13,734 --> 00:20:15,257
Just tell me what you want.
433
00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:17,303
I need you to stay here
with the kids.What?
434
00:20:17,346 --> 00:20:19,348
I want to spend
some time with Suzanne.
435
00:20:19,392 --> 00:20:21,045
Boy, I thought
you had to work.
436
00:20:21,089 --> 00:20:22,264
Not today.
437
00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:23,483
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
438
00:20:24,266 --> 00:20:25,354
Where are you going?
439
00:20:25,398 --> 00:20:27,008
To spend some time
with the kids.
440
00:20:27,051 --> 00:20:29,097
I don't want to sit around
for another day and a half,
441
00:20:29,140 --> 00:20:31,099
and I don't want to bother you
while you're working.
442
00:20:31,142 --> 00:20:33,275
I'm not working today.
I'm taking the day off.
443
00:20:33,319 --> 00:20:34,929
Mom's gonna stay home
with the kids.
444
00:20:34,972 --> 00:20:36,626
BOTH: For real?
445
00:20:36,670 --> 00:20:39,194
Look, I don't mind
bonding with you,
446
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,327
but you have got to stop
trying to touch me.
447
00:20:42,153 --> 00:20:44,155
Okay, so...
448
00:20:45,331 --> 00:20:46,810
What are we gonna do?
449
00:20:46,854 --> 00:20:48,943
Well, I figure we could go
to Pike's Place...Mm-hmm.
450
00:20:48,986 --> 00:20:51,075
Grab a little
something to eat...Mm-hmm.
451
00:20:51,119 --> 00:20:52,860
Go shopping.Mm-hmm.
452
00:20:52,903 --> 00:20:55,602
And go somewhere
and finish what we
were talking about upstairs.
453
00:20:56,733 --> 00:20:57,865
KEVIN: For the record,
454
00:20:57,908 --> 00:20:59,649
we know what
you're talking about.
455
00:20:59,693 --> 00:21:01,695
[CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
31782
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