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1
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On our watch.
2
00:00:08,340 --> 00:00:09,440
This is going to be cool.
3
00:00:10,300 --> 00:00:11,300
Yeah.
4
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Morning wood.
5
00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:16,680
I saw a dog with morning wood once.
6
00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:22,800
So, like, when you say you saw a dog
with morning wood, do you mean, like,
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had a wood drill or the dog did?
8
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We both did, I think.
9
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Check this out.
10
00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:33,400
Do you have any horses?
11
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No, we only have wild animals here.
12
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How about, like, really big dog?
13
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Wild animals only.
14
00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,860
So, like, do you have any woodpecker?
15
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Woodpecker. Why don't you kids go annoy
the animals or something?
16
00:01:10,890 --> 00:01:11,669
Paladin chain?
17
00:01:11,670 --> 00:01:12,790
Uh, yeah.
18
00:01:13,130 --> 00:01:15,010
Wow. Boy, they sure look different.
19
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Uh, maybe it's because I had to, like,
you know, clean themselves up, you know,
20
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because it's a slow song.
21
00:01:22,090 --> 00:01:23,330
Yeah, I'll buy that.
22
00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:31,410
You remember that time we went to the
circus and we saw that clown?
23
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And then I, like, pulled down my pants.
Whoa, check it out. I just saw a nipple,
24
00:01:35,910 --> 00:01:36,910
but it looked... Where?
25
00:01:37,810 --> 00:01:40,050
It was like right at the end of a boob.
26
00:01:40,250 --> 00:01:42,190
Beavis, that's just a puppet nipple.
27
00:01:43,970 --> 00:01:46,330
No, it wasn't. What do you mean?
28
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That's just like a chick made out of
clay, Beavis.
29
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Yeah,
30
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but she had a nipple on it.
31
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Beavis, I could go get some clay now and
make a boob with a nipple on it. So
32
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what?
33
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Wait a minute. Do you have some clay?
34
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No.
35
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Next time they have those clay projects
in school, I'm going to make a big boo.
36
00:02:14,350 --> 00:02:15,510
Maybe a butt, too.
37
00:02:15,770 --> 00:02:16,770
Yeah.
38
00:02:17,510 --> 00:02:19,470
Last time you just made an ashtray.
39
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It's fucked.
40
00:02:22,610 --> 00:02:23,610
Oh, yeah.
41
00:02:24,950 --> 00:02:26,530
Well, you made a baseball.
42
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Oh, yeah.
43
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Then the teacher called me a lazy turd.
44
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So then you made that.
45
00:02:34,850 --> 00:02:35,850
Yeah.
46
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But not out of clay.
47
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Which is so long that the elephant uses
it to feed himself.
48
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That would be cool.
49
00:02:49,870 --> 00:02:50,870
Yeah.
50
00:02:51,330 --> 00:02:53,290
But I don't see it. Where is it?
51
00:02:53,530 --> 00:02:54,530
Where?
52
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His nose is, like, in the way.
53
00:02:58,390 --> 00:03:00,190
Are there any questions back there?
54
00:03:02,450 --> 00:03:03,490
Yeah, yeah.
55
00:03:05,900 --> 00:03:08,380
Who has the biggest, uh, you know,
thingies?
56
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:10,920
Uh, what do you mean?
57
00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:14,280
He means, like, which animals have the
biggest thingies?
58
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Oh, yeah, that too.
59
00:03:17,740 --> 00:03:21,560
Well, I suppose it depends on what you
mean by thingies.
60
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:23,880
Giraffes do have very long necks.
61
00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:27,480
Unfortunately, our giraffe is laid up
with a pulled groin muscle.
62
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She's a little long.
63
00:03:33,799 --> 00:03:36,680
Well, next on our tour is a gorilla.
64
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This animal's natural habitat is the
jungles of Central Africa, and his diet
65
00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:48,260
includes... When he's bad or something,
do you ever, like, have to spank your
66
00:03:48,260 --> 00:03:49,260
monkey?
67
00:03:50,500 --> 00:03:54,720
No, we don't permit any violence towards
any of our animals.
68
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As I was saying, the gorilla's diet
includes... Because Beavis would be
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00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:00,840
spank his monkey.
70
00:04:01,790 --> 00:04:02,790
Shut up, Dillweed.
71
00:04:06,890 --> 00:04:10,910
Gentlemen, if you can't behave
yourselves, I'll have to ask you to
72
00:04:10,910 --> 00:04:13,930
tour. Uh, okay. Yeah, okay.
73
00:04:15,030 --> 00:04:16,029
No problem.
74
00:04:18,730 --> 00:04:23,390
The female zebra's reluctance to mate is
difficult to comprehend, since the male
75
00:04:23,390 --> 00:04:27,490
of the species is extremely well
endowed, as you can see.
76
00:04:27,770 --> 00:04:28,770
Whoa.
77
00:04:29,890 --> 00:04:30,890
Tours suck.
78
00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:32,200
Yeah.
79
00:04:32,460 --> 00:04:34,580
They never talk about anything cool.
80
00:04:36,980 --> 00:04:41,000
Coming up next, Butthead helps an old
lady across Snake River Canyon.
81
00:04:42,780 --> 00:04:43,780
Stay tuned.
82
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:49,100
All these animals must have been, like,
sprayed or something.
83
00:04:49,420 --> 00:04:53,680
Yeah, yeah. And someone, like, cut their
wieners off. And their dads, too.
84
00:04:55,140 --> 00:04:56,660
This move sucks.
85
00:04:58,140 --> 00:04:59,280
Let's get out of here.
86
00:05:00,230 --> 00:05:01,230
Yeah, really.
87
00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:05,250
Whoa.
88
00:05:06,870 --> 00:05:07,870
Snakes.
89
00:05:08,610 --> 00:05:09,610
Yeah, cool.
90
00:05:15,250 --> 00:05:16,930
Whoa, are they going to show a movie?
91
00:05:17,710 --> 00:05:19,890
We're in the snake home, fart knocker.
92
00:05:20,890 --> 00:05:23,070
They have to keep it dark because of the
snakes.
93
00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:26,950
It, like, makes them scarier or
something. Oh, yeah.
94
00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:32,330
Cool. There's, like, snakes everywhere.
95
00:05:33,770 --> 00:05:34,770
Yeah.
96
00:05:35,110 --> 00:05:39,450
You know, I bet, like, lots of chicks
get real, uh, excited in this place.
97
00:05:40,630 --> 00:05:44,650
Especially if a snake, like, escapes
from its cage or something.
98
00:05:46,050 --> 00:05:50,470
Yeah. They get all excited and go,
snake, snake, snake!
99
00:05:50,830 --> 00:05:52,310
Did he say snake? Escape.
100
00:05:52,930 --> 00:05:56,270
Escape, snake. Oh, my God. Where? Help!
Help! Snake!
101
00:06:10,180 --> 00:06:11,640
We're gonna die.
102
00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:15,540
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
103
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:19,280
That old dude gets a pretty good sound
out of that banjo.
104
00:06:19,820 --> 00:06:20,860
You rock.
105
00:06:21,580 --> 00:06:22,580
Uh,
106
00:06:25,100 --> 00:06:26,340
is this Skinner?
107
00:06:27,580 --> 00:06:28,580
No, wait.
108
00:06:28,860 --> 00:06:30,460
Hey, buddy, that's that guy from that
Ozzy video.
109
00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:33,280
Uh, what Ozzy video?
110
00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:35,840
Uh, it's that Ozzy video with that
chick.
111
00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:37,080
Oh, yeah.
112
00:06:37,700 --> 00:06:41,320
That one. You know, that one, um, the
one with that chick, like, that's, like,
113
00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:42,940
drowning in all those, uh, tears?
114
00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:47,940
Mm -hmm. And, like, you know, he's got
that guitar and he goes... Remember
115
00:06:47,940 --> 00:06:50,700
that?
116
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:52,960
Oh, yeah.
117
00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:54,040
That was cool.
118
00:07:04,030 --> 00:07:06,250
That old dude should start his own band.
119
00:07:06,710 --> 00:07:10,410
Yeah, yeah. It's like they could rock
out, and it's like they could go
120
00:07:11,090 --> 00:07:12,090
Yeah.
121
00:07:13,230 --> 00:07:14,230
Fishing is cool.
122
00:07:14,910 --> 00:07:15,910
Yeah, yeah.
123
00:07:16,450 --> 00:07:18,370
I like going fishing with worms.
124
00:07:18,590 --> 00:07:22,650
It's like you take the worm, and you put
that worm blower in it, and it'll blow
125
00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:23,650
up its butt.
126
00:07:23,670 --> 00:07:25,110
What are you talking about, Viva?
127
00:07:25,350 --> 00:07:27,930
You know, you got like a little pump,
and you stick them up the worm's butt.
128
00:07:27,930 --> 00:07:28,930
know what I'm talking about.
129
00:07:30,270 --> 00:07:31,270
No, I don't, Beaver.
130
00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:33,350
Yeah, like, it makes them float or
something.
131
00:07:34,990 --> 00:07:36,530
Oh, yeah!
132
00:07:37,350 --> 00:07:38,350
Yeah, yeah!
133
00:07:38,510 --> 00:07:40,130
What was in your mind?
134
00:07:41,270 --> 00:07:44,770
Uh... There's a snake! There's a snake!
There's a snake! We're gonna die!
135
00:07:45,610 --> 00:07:46,990
We're gonna die!
136
00:07:47,650 --> 00:07:53,130
I got him!
137
00:07:54,150 --> 00:07:55,390
Yeah, yeah, yeah, me too.
138
00:07:55,830 --> 00:07:57,270
I got him! I got him!
139
00:07:57,970 --> 00:07:59,070
Don't let go, Beaver.
140
00:07:59,940 --> 00:08:01,080
Yeah, yeah, I got him good.
141
00:08:01,860 --> 00:08:03,120
He's not that big.
142
00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:04,600
Yeah.
143
00:08:04,860 --> 00:08:06,260
He's a pretty small snake.
144
00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:08,680
Help!
145
00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:10,080
Snake!
146
00:08:10,840 --> 00:08:11,960
Hit the lights!
147
00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:13,580
Quick, turn on the lights!
148
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,120
What the hell?
149
00:08:18,420 --> 00:08:19,940
I thought you had him, dumbass.
150
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:21,160
You said you had him.
151
00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:22,640
Uh,
152
00:08:22,940 --> 00:08:25,280
I think he, like, escaped or something.
153
00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:27,800
Yeah, yeah, he got away. We had him,
though.
154
00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:43,250
It's a Flintstone.
155
00:08:44,990 --> 00:08:48,130
Pleased to make your acquaintance.
Please say hello to my butt.
156
00:08:48,910 --> 00:08:49,910
Yeah.
157
00:08:50,410 --> 00:08:51,790
My butt rocks.
158
00:08:52,650 --> 00:08:53,770
My rock butt.
159
00:08:58,610 --> 00:09:00,110
This isn't a Flintstone.
160
00:09:00,410 --> 00:09:05,750
This is Roseanne. Oh, yeah. Yeah,
there's Roseanne. That was Buttfan.
161
00:09:06,930 --> 00:09:07,930
Oh, yeah.
162
00:09:08,950 --> 00:09:11,930
Hey, Buttit. Is this what the Stone Age
was really like?
163
00:09:12,819 --> 00:09:15,020
No, it was more like Jurassic Park.
164
00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,540
Yeah, the special effects were better
back then.
165
00:09:19,220 --> 00:09:24,180
It was like intact, intact, intact,
intact, intact, intact.
166
00:09:24,820 --> 00:09:25,820
Yeah.
167
00:09:26,180 --> 00:09:27,720
Fuck, that's what I'm trying to say.
168
00:09:28,560 --> 00:09:29,560
Yeah.
169
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:34,560
If these were real cavemen, they'd,
like, have long hair and beards and
170
00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:38,020
be, like, sniffing each other's butts
and, like, beating each other up with
171
00:09:38,020 --> 00:09:40,420
rocks and, like, pulling women around by
their hair.
172
00:09:40,660 --> 00:09:41,660
Really?
173
00:09:42,170 --> 00:09:45,450
Hey, buddy, I bet my Uncle Louie's a
caveman. Oh, yeah.
174
00:09:46,210 --> 00:09:49,190
Do cavemen, like, have cars up on blocks
on their front lawn?
175
00:09:49,490 --> 00:09:51,570
Uh, I think so.
176
00:09:51,930 --> 00:09:55,150
Yeah, yeah, that's him. He's a caveman.
Yeah, I know that.
11827
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