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00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:09,139
[theme music]
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00:00:09,270 --> 00:00:10,445
- ♪ I'm goin' down
to South Park ♪
3
00:00:10,488 --> 00:00:12,403
♪ Gonna have myself a time
4
00:00:12,447 --> 00:00:13,883
- ♪ Friendly faces
everywhere ♪
5
00:00:13,970 --> 00:00:15,754
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
6
00:00:15,885 --> 00:00:16,973
- ♪ I'm goin' down
to South Park ♪
7
00:00:17,104 --> 00:00:18,888
♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪
8
00:00:18,931 --> 00:00:20,672
- ♪ Ample parking day
or night ♪
9
00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:22,457
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor" ♪
10
00:00:22,544 --> 00:00:23,675
- ♪ I'm headin' on down
to South Park ♪
11
00:00:23,762 --> 00:00:25,808
♪ Gonna see
if I can't unwind ♪
12
00:00:25,895 --> 00:00:29,072
- ♪ [mumbling] ♪
13
00:00:29,116 --> 00:00:30,291
- ♪ Come on down
to South Park ♪
14
00:00:30,334 --> 00:00:32,119
♪ And meet some friends
of mine ♪
15
00:00:41,693 --> 00:00:42,694
[knocking on door]
16
00:00:44,435 --> 00:00:46,437
- Hello, sir.
My name is Red,
17
00:00:46,481 --> 00:00:48,265
and I go to
South Park Elementary.
18
00:00:48,352 --> 00:00:50,006
Would you like to sign
my petition?
19
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,094
- Why sure, little girl.
20
00:00:51,225 --> 00:00:52,574
What's your petition for?
21
00:00:52,704 --> 00:00:54,924
- It's to try and get everyone
to smell my farts.
22
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:57,709
[farts loudly]
23
00:00:57,753 --> 00:01:00,495
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What's going on here?
24
00:01:00,582 --> 00:01:02,323
- Oh, wow, Santa Claus!
25
00:01:02,453 --> 00:01:04,107
- You've been a bad girl, Red,
26
00:01:04,238 --> 00:01:06,153
so I'm gonna piss
in your face now.
27
00:01:06,283 --> 00:01:08,676
- Oh, no, you better not,
Santa!
28
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:10,505
- Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
29
00:01:10,592 --> 00:01:11,462
- Ew!
- Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
30
00:01:11,506 --> 00:01:14,683
- [gurgling]
31
00:01:14,726 --> 00:01:16,946
- [laughs]
See?
32
00:01:16,989 --> 00:01:19,426
And then Santa Claus pisses
in her face!
33
00:01:19,557 --> 00:01:22,734
SANTA: There, now you smell
like Santa's piss.
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00:01:22,821 --> 00:01:24,562
- Wow, that looks pretty real.
35
00:01:24,693 --> 00:01:25,607
- Hey, fellas!
36
00:01:25,737 --> 00:01:26,956
Fellas, check this out!
37
00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:28,958
Me and Kenny made
a generative AI video
38
00:01:29,045 --> 00:01:30,829
of Red getting pissed on
by Santa Claus.
39
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,180
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
RED: [gurgling]
40
00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:34,833
- Aw, dude.
41
00:01:34,964 --> 00:01:37,053
- It's really easy,
you can make the videos online.
42
00:01:37,184 --> 00:01:38,707
We made one
of Red eating dog shit,
43
00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:40,535
and one of Red
barfing up tampons.
44
00:01:40,578 --> 00:01:41,971
- Dude, that's not cool.
45
00:01:42,014 --> 00:01:44,146
- Yeah, why would you guys
do this to her?
46
00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:46,584
- 'Cause Red's a bitch!
She totally used me.
47
00:01:46,715 --> 00:01:48,238
- [muffled speech]
48
00:01:48,369 --> 00:01:50,371
- Red pretended she liked me
to get me to buy her a Labubu.
49
00:01:50,501 --> 00:01:52,024
That bitch deserves it.
50
00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:54,331
- You shouldn't be using AI to
make revenge porn, Butters.
51
00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:55,811
That's gonna totally backfire.
52
00:01:55,941 --> 00:01:57,420
- Ah, what's gonna happen?
53
00:01:57,465 --> 00:02:01,251
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho, ho.
RED: [gurgling]
54
00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:03,558
That little shit!
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho, ho!
55
00:02:03,601 --> 00:02:05,081
- That little shit!
56
00:02:05,212 --> 00:02:06,430
- It's already
all over the school.
57
00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:08,215
Butters is trying
to humiliate you.
58
00:02:08,345 --> 00:02:09,781
- What the hell
did I do to him?
59
00:02:09,824 --> 00:02:11,783
- Well, you did kind of
use him.
60
00:02:11,870 --> 00:02:13,350
- I didn't use him.
61
00:02:13,394 --> 00:02:15,309
He wanted to buy me a Labubu.
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00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:16,788
- You should go tell
the principal, Red.
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00:02:16,875 --> 00:02:18,573
They said if anyone made
these kind of videos
64
00:02:18,616 --> 00:02:20,749
of other students,
they'd call the police.
65
00:02:21,532 --> 00:02:23,491
- I don't need to tell
the principal.
66
00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:25,362
There's gonna be a big assembly
this afternoon.
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00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:27,799
I'll get Butters back myself.
68
00:02:27,886 --> 00:02:30,585
[indistinct chatter]
69
00:02:30,628 --> 00:02:32,239
- All right, everyone,
listen up.
70
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:34,328
As you know, most of your
brains have been sucked void
71
00:02:34,458 --> 00:02:36,417
of common sense
by the woke radical left.
72
00:02:36,460 --> 00:02:39,420
And so today's topic is about
having some pride
73
00:02:39,550 --> 00:02:40,986
in America's heritage!
74
00:02:41,117 --> 00:02:42,597
Pay attention.
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00:02:42,684 --> 00:02:44,251
[militaristic music playing]
76
00:02:44,381 --> 00:02:45,861
ANNOUNCER: America.
77
00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:48,211
It was built on a dream.
78
00:02:48,255 --> 00:02:52,476
An idea that almost all people
should be free.
79
00:02:52,563 --> 00:02:55,871
When our forefathers first
came to this great nation,
80
00:02:56,001 --> 00:02:57,046
they--[static]--in the--
[static]--Mayflower--
81
00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:58,178
Plymouth--
82
00:02:58,221 --> 00:03:01,398
- ♪ Totoro, Totoro
83
00:03:01,442 --> 00:03:03,835
♪ Totoro, Totoro
84
00:03:03,966 --> 00:03:05,576
♪ ♪
85
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:06,664
- Well, hey, everybody!
86
00:03:06,795 --> 00:03:08,057
It's me, Butters.
87
00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:09,058
[upbeat music playing]
88
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:10,929
And this is my friend, Totoro.
89
00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:12,583
And you know what I'm gonna do?
90
00:03:12,627 --> 00:03:14,237
I'm gonna fuck him.
91
00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:16,152
Yep, that's right,
I'm Butters,
92
00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:18,763
and I'm gonna have sex
with Totoro right now.
93
00:03:18,850 --> 00:03:20,765
- Oh! Oh.
94
00:03:20,852 --> 00:03:22,593
[groans]
95
00:03:22,637 --> 00:03:23,507
[indistinct chatter]
96
00:03:23,638 --> 00:03:25,030
- Whoa!
97
00:03:25,161 --> 00:03:27,946
Oh, you bitch!
98
00:03:27,990 --> 00:03:29,992
- What the hell is this?
99
00:03:30,079 --> 00:03:31,385
- I told him.
100
00:03:31,428 --> 00:03:33,038
♪
101
00:03:33,168 --> 00:03:34,692
[dramatic music]
102
00:03:34,823 --> 00:03:37,347
- All right, Mrs. Cartman,
let me get this straight.
103
00:03:37,478 --> 00:03:41,003
You say the government...
took your child?
104
00:03:41,090 --> 00:03:43,179
- Eric was very sick.
105
00:03:43,310 --> 00:03:44,441
The doctor said
he only had
106
00:03:44,528 --> 00:03:46,530
another six or seven weeks
to live.
107
00:03:46,617 --> 00:03:48,097
And these people said
they could help him
108
00:03:48,140 --> 00:03:50,273
if they took him to Washington.
109
00:03:50,317 --> 00:03:52,319
- And they didn't invite you
to go alone?
110
00:03:52,449 --> 00:03:53,885
Seems a little farfetched.
111
00:03:53,929 --> 00:03:56,497
- It was all so confusing.
112
00:03:56,540 --> 00:03:59,108
They said it was about
national security.
113
00:03:59,195 --> 00:04:00,892
I've been getting updates
and emails,
114
00:04:00,979 --> 00:04:03,547
but I don't even know
what to believe anymore.
115
00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,070
- Detective Harris, sir,
116
00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:06,768
we need to get down
to the school right away.
117
00:04:06,898 --> 00:04:07,899
- What's the matter?
118
00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:09,336
- There's a young boy there,
sir.
119
00:04:09,379 --> 00:04:11,468
Appears he's been molested
by Totoro.
120
00:04:11,512 --> 00:04:13,775
- Holy shit!
Sorry, Mrs. Cartman.
121
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:15,559
We'll look into it for you
when we can.
122
00:04:15,690 --> 00:04:18,779
- But what about Eric?
123
00:04:18,910 --> 00:04:22,043
[indistinct
police radio chatter]
124
00:04:26,091 --> 00:04:28,006
- All right, kid, you wanna
tell me what happened?
125
00:04:29,225 --> 00:04:30,705
- I don't know nuttin'!
126
00:04:30,748 --> 00:04:33,011
- We've seen the video, kid.
127
00:04:33,142 --> 00:04:36,276
How long have you and Totoro
been sexually active?
128
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:38,016
- What?
129
00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:40,367
I don't know nuttin'!
130
00:04:40,409 --> 00:04:42,412
- Look, that forest-dwelling
piece of shit
131
00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:43,718
is just gonna keep doing this
to kids
132
00:04:43,805 --> 00:04:45,241
unless you talk to us.
133
00:04:45,372 --> 00:04:47,025
I wanna know where
you met Totoro,
134
00:04:47,156 --> 00:04:49,811
and I want a description
of his penis.
135
00:04:49,941 --> 00:04:51,508
- Sir, you better come
take a look at this.
136
00:04:51,595 --> 00:04:53,118
- What is it?
137
00:04:53,162 --> 00:04:55,164
- There's another young student
here at this school
138
00:04:55,207 --> 00:04:58,210
that appears to have just been
raped by Popeye.
139
00:04:58,341 --> 00:05:00,517
- Popeye?
That son of a bitch!
140
00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:02,606
- I don't know nuttin'!
141
00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:04,129
POPEYE: Huh, yuck, yuck, yuck,
yuck, yuck.
142
00:05:04,173 --> 00:05:05,957
Oh-ho, whoa!
Yuck...
143
00:05:06,088 --> 00:05:07,829
- Jesus Christ.
144
00:05:07,916 --> 00:05:10,397
POPEYE: Yuck, yuck, yuck,
yuck, yuck, oh...
145
00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:13,138
- Oh, my God!
What the hell is going on here?
146
00:05:13,182 --> 00:05:14,966
- We think Totoro and Popeye
might somehow
147
00:05:15,053 --> 00:05:17,969
be working together, sir.
148
00:05:18,056 --> 00:05:20,276
- This all has to be connected.
149
00:05:20,407 --> 00:05:22,844
A string of rapes,
the missing Cartman boy--
150
00:05:22,974 --> 00:05:25,760
South Park's going to shit
right before our eyes.
151
00:05:25,890 --> 00:05:27,631
- Sir?
152
00:05:27,718 --> 00:05:30,199
- There's something very wrong
going on here, Mitch,
153
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:32,636
and I'm gonna find out what.
154
00:05:37,075 --> 00:05:39,861
[machinery whirring,
clanking, beeping]
155
00:05:52,569 --> 00:05:53,788
- Boss,
156
00:05:53,875 --> 00:05:56,181
please don't be mad at me.
157
00:05:56,312 --> 00:05:58,227
Everything I did...
158
00:05:58,358 --> 00:05:59,794
I did for you.
159
00:05:59,837 --> 00:06:02,057
- You were manipulating me.
160
00:06:02,187 --> 00:06:04,189
This whole time, you've been
trying to get me
161
00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:05,887
to get rid of Satan's baby.
162
00:06:05,930 --> 00:06:09,673
- Yes, because I know you want
to get rid of the baby, boss.
163
00:06:10,805 --> 00:06:11,719
[chair scrapes]
164
00:06:14,025 --> 00:06:17,202
I was just trying to help you.
165
00:06:17,246 --> 00:06:19,814
I would do anything for you.
166
00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:21,424
You...
167
00:06:21,555 --> 00:06:23,948
are the greatest boss
168
00:06:23,992 --> 00:06:26,603
I ever had.
169
00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:30,999
And I just want you
to be happy.
170
00:06:31,042 --> 00:06:32,783
- Of course
I don't want the baby,
171
00:06:32,827 --> 00:06:34,916
but everyone's so excited.
172
00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:36,396
I can't get out of it.
173
00:06:38,049 --> 00:06:40,008
- I have a guy, boss.
174
00:06:40,051 --> 00:06:41,226
[sinister music]
175
00:06:41,270 --> 00:06:44,404
He's in Colorado right now.
176
00:06:44,491 --> 00:06:48,582
He is an expert in all of this.
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00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:50,192
♪
178
00:06:52,716 --> 00:06:55,545
- Nobody's here to
embarrass you, all right son?
179
00:06:55,676 --> 00:06:59,593
We just wanna know what
happened between you and Popeye.
180
00:06:59,636 --> 00:07:01,856
- [muffled speech]
181
00:07:01,899 --> 00:07:03,161
- You can't tell 'em
the girls did it to you
182
00:07:03,292 --> 00:07:04,206
'cause you helped me
or they're gonna know
183
00:07:04,249 --> 00:07:05,729
we did it to them first!
184
00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:08,166
We don't know nothing!
185
00:07:08,297 --> 00:07:09,907
- Did Totoro tell you
to say that?
186
00:07:10,038 --> 00:07:12,736
You don't need
to protect these scumbags.
187
00:07:12,867 --> 00:07:15,304
- Sir,
there's a Studio Ghibli here
188
00:07:15,347 --> 00:07:16,653
that wants to talk to the kid.
189
00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:18,525
- What's s Studio Ghibli?
190
00:07:18,568 --> 00:07:21,702
- Some Japanese guys,
say they represent Totoro.
191
00:07:21,832 --> 00:07:22,832
- You!
192
00:07:22,877 --> 00:07:25,053
You fuck Totoro!
193
00:07:25,096 --> 00:07:29,884
- Totoro is Studio Ghibli IP!
194
00:07:29,971 --> 00:07:32,321
- Ah, Totoro's already got
some lawyers, huh?
195
00:07:32,364 --> 00:07:35,411
- It takes hundreds of artists
196
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,674
three years to make Totoro!
197
00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:39,633
And in two minutes
198
00:07:39,676 --> 00:07:41,461
you spit out you shit
199
00:07:41,548 --> 00:07:43,201
and fuck Totoro!
200
00:07:43,332 --> 00:07:45,856
- Studio Ghibli no sakuhin!
201
00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:46,901
- What?
202
00:07:46,944 --> 00:07:49,207
- [muffled speech]
203
00:07:49,251 --> 00:07:52,776
- All right, I can't understand
a word anyone here is saying.
204
00:07:52,907 --> 00:07:54,299
- You stop!
205
00:07:54,343 --> 00:07:57,302
This is a "shi-shu"
and "deshishto!"
206
00:07:57,433 --> 00:07:59,174
- "Shi-shu" and "deshishto!"
207
00:07:59,304 --> 00:08:00,871
- Mitch, get 'em outta here!
208
00:08:02,438 --> 00:08:03,439
- Shimatta!
209
00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:06,573
Totoro no meiyo ga kegasareta!
210
00:08:06,660 --> 00:08:10,707
- You cannot just do
whatever you want
211
00:08:10,751 --> 00:08:15,277
with someone else's IP!
212
00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:17,453
- Yo, what's up, Mom?
It's your boy, Eric,
213
00:08:17,584 --> 00:08:19,194
live from Washington, D.C.
Day one, baby.
214
00:08:19,324 --> 00:08:20,238
Look,
that's a big pointy thing--
215
00:08:20,369 --> 00:08:21,457
uh, the Washington Monument.
216
00:08:21,588 --> 00:08:22,806
Whole reflection pool's
right there.
217
00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:23,677
It's like a giant bathtub,
but with ducks.
218
00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:25,026
Everything's great. Promise.
219
00:08:25,156 --> 00:08:26,680
Hey, Mom, it's me.
Just want you to know
220
00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:28,986
I am totally safe
and in no danger whatsoever.
221
00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:31,162
Dude, there's a castle
at the end of the street
222
00:08:31,206 --> 00:08:32,120
and everyone smells
like popcorn.
223
00:08:32,163 --> 00:08:33,904
This is unreal, forever.
224
00:08:34,034 --> 00:08:35,427
Just want to let everyone know
I'm safe and sound.
225
00:08:35,558 --> 00:08:37,385
No, kitty, that's my pot pie!
226
00:08:37,472 --> 00:08:38,779
I love Cheesy Poofs and--
227
00:08:38,909 --> 00:08:39,909
Rawr! Respect my authority!
Bye!
228
00:08:39,953 --> 00:08:41,259
- Oh, Eric,
229
00:08:41,303 --> 00:08:43,740
Mommy misses you.
230
00:08:43,784 --> 00:08:47,004
[dramatic music]
231
00:08:47,135 --> 00:08:49,398
- "A boy from South Park
232
00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:51,618
"tells his mom he's doing good
233
00:08:51,748 --> 00:08:53,968
and he'll be home soon."
234
00:08:54,055 --> 00:08:55,230
- Hey, dude, fuck you.
235
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:56,927
That is totally not cool,
what you're doing.
236
00:08:56,971 --> 00:08:58,015
[eerie tone]
237
00:08:58,146 --> 00:08:59,539
- "The boy is fat
238
00:08:59,626 --> 00:09:03,586
and authoritative."
239
00:09:03,630 --> 00:09:04,631
- Hey, Mom,
things are good here.
240
00:09:04,761 --> 00:09:05,980
I love Cheesy Poofs!
241
00:09:06,023 --> 00:09:07,372
I'm just stoked
to be feeling better,
242
00:09:07,416 --> 00:09:08,939
and I'll be home soon.
Respect my authority!
243
00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:11,202
Bro, everyone's gonna know
that's not really me.
244
00:09:11,246 --> 00:09:12,639
I haven't even talked
about Cheesy Poofs
245
00:09:12,769 --> 00:09:13,727
in, like, five years.
246
00:09:13,770 --> 00:09:15,250
- You shut up!
247
00:09:15,380 --> 00:09:17,208
We'll be going
to Washington soon,
248
00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:18,819
and then you're gonna help me
249
00:09:18,949 --> 00:09:20,995
stop the antichrist
from being born.
250
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:24,520
And we're gonna save the world.
251
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,435
- Not for free, dude!
252
00:09:26,478 --> 00:09:29,307
If you wanna use me, then you
gotta pay a motherfucker.
253
00:09:29,438 --> 00:09:31,092
You don't get to make me go do
a bunch of weird shit
254
00:09:31,222 --> 00:09:32,484
that I would normally never do.
255
00:09:32,615 --> 00:09:35,966
- It's the world you live in,
kid.
256
00:09:36,010 --> 00:09:40,449
Anyone can make you
do anything they want.
257
00:09:40,536 --> 00:09:42,190
- No, kitty,
that's my authority!
258
00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:43,583
Pot pie!
259
00:09:47,848 --> 00:09:50,764
[stately music]
260
00:09:50,807 --> 00:09:53,593
♪
261
00:09:55,203 --> 00:09:58,075
- I word really hard.
You know?
262
00:09:58,206 --> 00:10:02,384
I just feel like I deserve
to relax a bit, guy.
263
00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:04,821
- Of course you do, boss.
264
00:10:04,908 --> 00:10:07,694
This baby is too much for you.
265
00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:10,610
- I tried abortion clinics,
Plan B,
266
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:12,916
but this baby just won't die!
267
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:16,703
- And that is how my guy in
Colorado can help us, boss.
268
00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:19,923
Only he can stop the antichrist.
269
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:23,057
If we bring him here,
to Washington, then we can--
270
00:10:23,100 --> 00:10:24,406
- What are you guys doing?
271
00:10:24,449 --> 00:10:26,669
TRUMP: Hey, relax, guy!
272
00:10:26,713 --> 00:10:29,106
We're having
an important meeting!
273
00:10:29,237 --> 00:10:30,891
- What are you talking about?
274
00:10:31,021 --> 00:10:33,676
- It's government stuff, Satan.
275
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:35,678
- OK, so I guess
I'm going to the pediatrician
276
00:10:35,809 --> 00:10:37,245
by myself again.
277
00:10:37,288 --> 00:10:38,463
- Hey, relax, guy!
278
00:10:38,594 --> 00:10:40,335
We have to do this.
279
00:10:40,465 --> 00:10:42,859
- You're such a piece of shit.
280
00:10:45,775 --> 00:10:47,690
- You see?
Always bitching at me.
281
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:50,301
I should be treated better
than that.
282
00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:52,695
- Yes, boss, you should.
283
00:10:52,826 --> 00:10:55,785
That's why you need to trust me.
284
00:10:55,915 --> 00:11:00,094
Nobody feels for you
the way that I do.
285
00:11:00,137 --> 00:11:01,791
Nobody, boss.
286
00:11:12,106 --> 00:11:14,891
[laughter and shouting]
287
00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:19,853
- Hey, Red, can we talk to you?
288
00:11:19,896 --> 00:11:21,289
- Sure, Kyle.
289
00:11:21,332 --> 00:11:24,945
- I'm here to help Butters
try to call a truce.
290
00:11:25,075 --> 00:11:26,729
- What kind of truce?
291
00:11:26,773 --> 00:11:29,514
- It's just all this Sora stuff
is kinda getting out of hand.
292
00:11:29,645 --> 00:11:30,864
I know Butters started it,
293
00:11:30,907 --> 00:11:32,213
so then you guys made one
of him,
294
00:11:32,343 --> 00:11:34,258
but then you guys made one
of Kenny,
295
00:11:34,389 --> 00:11:37,348
and I just think we all need
to respect each other more.
296
00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:39,307
- You know what?
You're right, Kyle.
297
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:40,917
You're really a smart guy.
298
00:11:40,961 --> 00:11:43,528
- Thanks, Red.
I feel like a smart guy.
299
00:11:43,659 --> 00:11:46,140
It's 'cause I'm a Jew.
300
00:11:46,227 --> 00:11:49,230
- Excuse me, is your name Kyle?
301
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:51,145
- Oh, wow, it's Droopy Dog!
302
00:11:51,232 --> 00:11:52,886
- Hey, Droopy Dog.
Yeah, I'm Kyle.
303
00:11:52,929 --> 00:11:54,670
- You know what?
304
00:11:54,801 --> 00:11:57,238
I'm gonna take a shit
in your mouth.
305
00:11:57,368 --> 00:11:59,283
- Oh, no, Droopy Dog,
don't shit in my mouth!
306
00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:00,328
Bad dog!
307
00:12:00,458 --> 00:12:02,243
- Here it comes.
308
00:12:02,373 --> 00:12:04,114
[farting]
- [groaning]
309
00:12:04,158 --> 00:12:06,856
- You like that, you dumb Jew?
310
00:12:06,987 --> 00:12:08,336
[farting]
- [Kyle groaning]
311
00:12:08,379 --> 00:12:10,381
- Dude, what the hell?
- You see?
312
00:12:10,425 --> 00:12:11,992
The girls did one
about you now.
313
00:12:12,122 --> 00:12:13,602
- What the hell did I do?
314
00:12:13,645 --> 00:12:15,256
- It don't matter, I told you!
315
00:12:15,386 --> 00:12:17,040
Red's just a bitch.
316
00:12:17,084 --> 00:12:20,827
- You like that hot shit
in your Jew mouth?
317
00:12:20,914 --> 00:12:22,785
- I mean, you got to admit
it's pretty impressive.
318
00:12:22,916 --> 00:12:24,265
It looks really real.
319
00:12:24,395 --> 00:12:26,006
- It's not impressive!
It's fucked up.
320
00:12:26,136 --> 00:12:27,529
How is this even legal?
321
00:12:27,616 --> 00:12:29,052
- Nothing's sacred, Kyle.
322
00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:31,402
All you can do is fight fire
with fire.
323
00:12:31,489 --> 00:12:33,056
- Well, then let's see
how Red likes it
324
00:12:33,187 --> 00:12:34,841
when we make one of her
and Bluey.
325
00:12:34,971 --> 00:12:35,972
- Yeah!
326
00:12:36,016 --> 00:12:39,584
[ominous music]
327
00:12:43,066 --> 00:12:46,635
- We've had 12 new cases
in the past 14 hours,
328
00:12:46,678 --> 00:12:49,812
and you're telling me we can't
get one kid to testify?
329
00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:51,683
- None of the kids will talk,
sir.
330
00:12:51,814 --> 00:12:54,121
- We're running out of time
here, people.
331
00:12:54,251 --> 00:12:56,340
These predators are all gonna
start lawyering up
332
00:12:56,427 --> 00:12:57,602
like Totoro did.
333
00:12:57,733 --> 00:12:59,822
- We're not lawyer!
334
00:12:59,953 --> 00:13:02,477
Studio Ghibli make Totoro
335
00:13:02,607 --> 00:13:05,872
with pencil and paint,
336
00:13:05,915 --> 00:13:10,528
not by typing sentence
on stupid Sora app!
337
00:13:12,008 --> 00:13:14,663
- Nobody can understand
anything you're saying,
338
00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:17,187
so I don't know
what to tell you, buddy.
339
00:13:17,231 --> 00:13:19,233
- We're just getting
no cooperation.
340
00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:21,452
Every kid we interview,
we get the same thing.
341
00:13:21,496 --> 00:13:23,890
"That's not me.
Someone else did that."
342
00:13:23,977 --> 00:13:26,066
- That's the South Park
we're living in, Mitch.
343
00:13:26,196 --> 00:13:28,503
Kids won't talk to a cop,
344
00:13:28,633 --> 00:13:31,636
but they'll do anything Rocky
and Bullwinkle tell 'em to do.
345
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,422
[snaps]
That's it.
346
00:13:34,465 --> 00:13:37,425
We gotta go undercover
as a couple of these predators
347
00:13:37,468 --> 00:13:40,602
and gain a little kid's trust.
348
00:13:40,645 --> 00:13:44,867
[keyboard clacking]
349
00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:46,608
[phone rings]
350
00:13:46,695 --> 00:13:48,436
- Yeah. What's going on?
351
00:13:48,479 --> 00:13:50,438
- Everything is OK.
352
00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:52,919
We have Trump's approval now.
353
00:13:52,962 --> 00:13:54,834
- The president knows
of our plans?
354
00:13:54,921 --> 00:13:56,096
VANCE: Yes.
355
00:13:56,226 --> 00:13:59,142
He and I are on the same page.
356
00:13:59,273 --> 00:14:00,491
- What's he say?
357
00:14:00,578 --> 00:14:02,885
- But we cannot proceed
just yet.
358
00:14:02,929 --> 00:14:05,496
Can you keep the child on ice
a little longer?
359
00:14:05,540 --> 00:14:07,411
- No problem--with Sora 2,
360
00:14:07,542 --> 00:14:09,849
I can make the South Park kid
do just about anything.
361
00:14:09,936 --> 00:14:11,851
- Dude, fuck you.
362
00:14:11,938 --> 00:14:13,504
That is so lame.
363
00:14:16,812 --> 00:14:19,467
[Foreigner's "I Want to Know
What Love Is"]
364
00:14:19,597 --> 00:14:21,338
♪ ♪
365
00:14:21,469 --> 00:14:25,386
- But boss, what about Satan?
366
00:14:25,516 --> 00:14:32,219
♪ ♪
367
00:14:35,526 --> 00:14:38,660
- ♪ I want to know
what love is ♪
368
00:14:38,747 --> 00:14:40,618
♪ ♪
369
00:14:40,662 --> 00:14:43,883
- Oh, boss, it's so big.
370
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:46,973
♪ ♪
371
00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:50,411
- ♪ I want to feel
what love is ♪
372
00:14:50,540 --> 00:14:53,370
♪ ♪
373
00:14:53,501 --> 00:14:54,719
♪ I know you can show me ♪
374
00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:57,505
- Oh, boss!
375
00:14:57,635 --> 00:14:59,855
Boss!
376
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:02,118
Yes, boss!
377
00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:03,685
Yes, boss!
378
00:15:06,601 --> 00:15:09,430
[crickets chirping]
379
00:15:12,346 --> 00:15:16,567
- How much longer we gotta do
this shit, Mitch?
380
00:15:16,611 --> 00:15:18,787
You remember
when things made sense?
381
00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:22,312
You put your time in.
You did the work.
382
00:15:22,356 --> 00:15:25,359
But now this stuff
we're seeing,
383
00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:27,665
it's like someone shook
the snow globe and said,
384
00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:30,755
"Here you go,
make sense of this."
385
00:15:30,799 --> 00:15:33,019
- I don't understand it much
either, sir.
386
00:15:33,149 --> 00:15:36,326
Maybe we're just too old.
387
00:15:36,370 --> 00:15:39,808
- We used to go after
normal criminals.
388
00:15:39,895 --> 00:15:43,594
But now the criminals have
faces that can just start
389
00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:47,381
turning into oranges
that eat other oranges.
390
00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:49,905
That's when you realize
391
00:15:50,036 --> 00:15:53,996
maybe the job doesn't need you
anymore.
392
00:15:54,127 --> 00:15:56,738
- Hey, look.
Kid's coming out.
393
00:15:56,825 --> 00:15:59,828
- Let's do this.
394
00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:02,352
Hey there, little girl.
It's Rocky and Bullwinkle.
395
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:04,354
You looking for a good time?
396
00:16:04,398 --> 00:16:07,140
[dramatic musical sting]
397
00:16:09,403 --> 00:16:13,494
[dramatic music]
398
00:16:13,537 --> 00:16:16,845
- The South Park Police
Department had to go undercover
399
00:16:16,932 --> 00:16:19,979
in order to finally get
to the truth in this case.
400
00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:21,632
And what the evidence will show
401
00:16:21,719 --> 00:16:24,157
is that an innocent girl
was humiliated
402
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:27,073
by the actions of these boys.
403
00:16:27,116 --> 00:16:29,989
All right, little girl,
you say the boys just used you.
404
00:16:30,076 --> 00:16:31,773
Is that right?
405
00:16:31,860 --> 00:16:33,383
- That's right.
406
00:16:33,514 --> 00:16:35,646
They made me do things
I would normally never do.
407
00:16:35,690 --> 00:16:39,172
- Exactly what kinds of things?
408
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:41,261
- They made me
go to the bathroom
409
00:16:41,391 --> 00:16:44,960
in a very, very bad place.
410
00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:46,179
- And did the suspects
offer you
411
00:16:46,222 --> 00:16:48,616
any kind of compensation?
412
00:16:48,659 --> 00:16:50,879
- I didn't make one cent!
413
00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:53,403
[crowd gasping]
414
00:16:53,447 --> 00:16:55,665
- What the hell is going on?
415
00:16:55,753 --> 00:16:57,973
They're turning the kids
into the victims?
416
00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,844
This whole thing stinks!
417
00:16:59,888 --> 00:17:01,977
Why don't you go fuck yourself,
Bluey?
418
00:17:02,108 --> 00:17:03,065
[crowd gasping]
[gavel banging]
419
00:17:03,196 --> 00:17:04,980
- Order! Order!
420
00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:07,069
- My client has been
misrepresented,
421
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:09,070
and these boys are going
to jail!
422
00:17:09,202 --> 00:17:10,855
- It wasn't their fault,
all right?
423
00:17:10,986 --> 00:17:13,467
It's all my fault!
424
00:17:13,510 --> 00:17:15,556
This all started with me,
425
00:17:15,685 --> 00:17:17,906
because my heart was broken.
426
00:17:17,949 --> 00:17:20,300
I made the first videos
using Sora 2.
427
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:21,866
I saw the ones
Eric Cartman made
428
00:17:21,910 --> 00:17:23,651
to get out of going to school,
and I thought
429
00:17:23,781 --> 00:17:26,132
I could make these about Red
'cause the bitch deserves it.
430
00:17:26,262 --> 00:17:27,785
But it was just me.
431
00:17:29,570 --> 00:17:32,312
- Wait, you're saying
that the Eric Cartman videos
432
00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:34,096
are all being created
by someone
433
00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:36,881
to distort the truth?
434
00:17:37,012 --> 00:17:38,709
That's gotta be Totoro!
435
00:17:38,753 --> 00:17:41,669
Trace the IP address, and let's
get the son of a bitch!
436
00:17:41,712 --> 00:17:44,454
[sirens wailing]
[tires squeal]
437
00:17:44,498 --> 00:17:46,500
[indistinct radio chatter]
438
00:17:46,630 --> 00:17:48,502
- Ah!
439
00:17:48,545 --> 00:17:50,373
[keyboard clacking]
440
00:17:50,504 --> 00:17:51,853
- Freeze!
441
00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:54,595
- We got the kid, sir.
442
00:17:54,725 --> 00:17:56,031
- You're making a big mistake.
443
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,294
I have powerful connections.
444
00:17:58,338 --> 00:17:59,774
- Oh, I know you do.
445
00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:01,558
But no magical Catbus is gonna
446
00:18:01,689 --> 00:18:04,300
whisk you away from justice
this time.
447
00:18:04,344 --> 00:18:06,128
- Mom!
448
00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:08,478
- Oh, Eric, you're safe!
449
00:18:08,522 --> 00:18:10,524
- How the hell did it take you
this long
450
00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:12,395
to figure out
those videos of me were fake?
451
00:18:12,526 --> 00:18:14,919
- Oh, well, they looked
so real, sweetie.
452
00:18:14,963 --> 00:18:18,575
- When is the last time I even
ate a pot pie, you dumb bitch?
453
00:18:18,706 --> 00:18:20,055
- Get him out of here.
454
00:18:20,186 --> 00:18:23,667
Lock him up
with the Japanese lawyers.
455
00:18:23,798 --> 00:18:26,757
Well, Mitch, looks like
we just busted a huge community
456
00:18:26,801 --> 00:18:28,890
of online rapists
called Sora 2.
457
00:18:28,977 --> 00:18:30,631
- Great job, sir.
458
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:33,590
- Detective Harris,
you better take a look at this.
459
00:18:33,721 --> 00:18:35,549
This guy didn't just
make videos.
460
00:18:35,592 --> 00:18:37,072
He also has
surveillance equipment
461
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:38,639
all over the White House.
462
00:18:38,769 --> 00:18:40,554
- White House?
- Yeah.
463
00:18:40,597 --> 00:18:42,338
He's got this video
of the president
464
00:18:42,382 --> 00:18:43,948
in the Lincoln Bedroom.
465
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:45,907
VANCE: Oh, boss!
466
00:18:45,950 --> 00:18:47,300
Boss!
467
00:18:47,430 --> 00:18:49,563
- Jesus Christ.
VANCE: Yes, boss!
468
00:18:49,606 --> 00:18:51,565
Yes, boss!
469
00:18:51,652 --> 00:18:54,394
- Oh, my God, what the hell
is going on here?
470
00:18:54,524 --> 00:18:55,873
- Oh, boy.
471
00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:59,921
When Fox News sees this,
they are not gonna be happy.
472
00:19:01,531 --> 00:19:05,579
ANNOUNCER: This is a...
Fox News...
473
00:19:05,622 --> 00:19:07,276
special alert.
474
00:19:09,539 --> 00:19:13,804
- Some, uh, very troubling news
from the White House today.
475
00:19:13,891 --> 00:19:17,765
Apparently, a security camera
in the Lincoln Bedroom
476
00:19:17,808 --> 00:19:23,118
has caught President Trump
having...relations
477
00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,860
with Vice President Vance.
478
00:19:25,990 --> 00:19:28,732
Fox News is live
at the White House.
479
00:19:30,604 --> 00:19:33,128
- Yeah, hey.
480
00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:36,305
Definitely disheartening news
here.
481
00:19:36,436 --> 00:19:38,655
Why the president would do this
to Satan
482
00:19:38,786 --> 00:19:42,050
with a baby on the way,
we don't know.
483
00:19:42,093 --> 00:19:43,704
Guess it's anyone's guess why--
484
00:19:43,834 --> 00:19:46,228
- Sorry, sorry, we gotta
interrupt you there.
485
00:19:46,272 --> 00:19:49,188
Uh, we just got word
that the president is
486
00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:50,972
calling in to "Fox & Friends."
487
00:19:51,059 --> 00:19:54,367
Are you there, sir?
488
00:19:54,410 --> 00:19:57,152
TRUMP: Hello?
Hi? Hello?
489
00:19:57,283 --> 00:20:00,938
- Yes. Mr. President,
what is going on?
490
00:20:01,069 --> 00:20:02,636
TRUMP: Oh, we're doing
some great things here.
491
00:20:02,679 --> 00:20:04,246
More than Sleepy Joe Biden
ever did!
492
00:20:04,377 --> 00:20:05,682
Everything's great!
493
00:20:05,813 --> 00:20:08,163
- Well, what about you
and the vice president?
494
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:11,035
TRUMP: Hey, relax, guy!
495
00:20:11,079 --> 00:20:12,646
- We're trying to relax, sir,
496
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:14,865
but we've all seen
the security footage.
497
00:20:14,909 --> 00:20:16,258
TRUMP: No, that's fake!
498
00:20:16,389 --> 00:20:18,695
That's all--it's all Sora 2.
499
00:20:18,826 --> 00:20:20,262
- It's fake?
500
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:22,221
TRUMP: Yeah, guy,
that's all Sora 2!
501
00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:24,092
That's all fake!
502
00:20:24,135 --> 00:20:27,138
- Oh, it's fake!
Oh, thank God!
503
00:20:27,269 --> 00:20:29,663
- Of course it was fake.
How could we have doubted it?
504
00:20:29,706 --> 00:20:31,142
[dramatic musical sting]
505
00:20:31,273 --> 00:20:33,928
ANNOUNCER: This is a Fox News
fake news alert.
506
00:20:34,058 --> 00:20:35,756
- Totally fake news today
507
00:20:35,799 --> 00:20:39,063
as the president did not have
sex with the vice president.
508
00:20:45,113 --> 00:20:48,682
- You swear on everything
that video was fake.
509
00:20:48,725 --> 00:20:50,945
- Of course it's fake, Satan!
510
00:20:51,075 --> 00:20:53,687
- OK, 'cause it looks
really real.
511
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:56,124
- Satan, I swear on the baby.
512
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:57,734
I wouldn't do that to you.
513
00:20:57,865 --> 00:20:59,432
Relax, guy.
514
00:20:59,475 --> 00:21:01,912
- OK.
- Great.
515
00:21:01,956 --> 00:21:04,088
Well, I gotta go get a snack.
516
00:21:04,132 --> 00:21:05,786
You want anything
from downstairs?
517
00:21:05,916 --> 00:21:07,266
- No, I'm good.
518
00:21:13,228 --> 00:21:15,143
- All right,
what's the situation?
519
00:21:15,230 --> 00:21:19,147
- The detective in Colorado
is very stubborn, boss.
520
00:21:19,190 --> 00:21:21,497
He will not give us
Peter Thiel.
521
00:21:21,541 --> 00:21:23,282
- How can he not hand him over?
522
00:21:23,369 --> 00:21:24,892
I'm the president!
523
00:21:24,935 --> 00:21:26,459
- Don't worry, boss.
524
00:21:26,589 --> 00:21:28,896
We will not let that town
get in the way
525
00:21:28,939 --> 00:21:30,854
of our plans together.
526
00:21:46,087 --> 00:21:48,959
[theme music]
527
00:21:49,090 --> 00:21:55,966
♪ ♪
37251
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