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1
00:00:07,139 --> 00:00:09,675
[ Theme music playing ]
2
00:00:09,742 --> 00:00:16,082
♪♪
3
00:00:16,149 --> 00:00:22,489
♪♪
4
00:00:22,556 --> 00:00:24,390
It's alive!
5
00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:31,457
♪♪
6
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:40,600
♪♪
7
00:00:42,742 --> 00:00:46,579
Who watches the Watchmen?
8
00:00:46,646 --> 00:00:48,681
Heh...
Ah, shit, they're onto us!
9
00:00:48,748 --> 00:00:49,782
[ Rustles ]
10
00:00:49,849 --> 00:00:53,453
[ Pop music playing ]
11
00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:55,588
♪ If you're goin' to be
our lice host ♪
12
00:00:55,655 --> 00:00:57,456
♪ We're going to latch
onto your head ♪
13
00:00:57,523 --> 00:00:59,725
♪ This one belongs to Jessica ♪
14
00:00:59,792 --> 00:01:02,028
♪ And she just turned ten ♪
15
00:01:02,095 --> 00:01:04,497
♪ Lice breed
in close proximity ♪
16
00:01:04,563 --> 00:01:06,465
♪ We multiply with ease ♪
17
00:01:06,532 --> 00:01:08,668
♪ She picked us up
in the ball pit ♪
18
00:01:08,734 --> 00:01:10,936
♪ At a local Chuck E. Cheese ♪
19
00:01:11,003 --> 00:01:13,672
♪ So, here's the deal
on parasites, baby ♪
20
00:01:13,739 --> 00:01:15,641
♪ It's really hard to get rid of
her and her and me ♪
21
00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:17,543
♪ Got nits on the root,
laying eggs to boot ♪
22
00:01:17,609 --> 00:01:19,845
♪ Got bugs in your rug from
a dirty fella's nugs ♪
23
00:01:19,912 --> 00:01:21,613
♪ Use shampoo,
you better rinse, repeat ♪
24
00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:23,649
♪ Look at me, ha-ha,
I'm in the laundry ♪
25
00:01:23,716 --> 00:01:24,984
-Lice Girls!
-You are never going to
26
00:01:25,051 --> 00:01:26,986
Chuck E. Cheese ever again.
27
00:01:27,052 --> 00:01:30,089
What do you think we abducted
this time, Zandar?
28
00:01:30,156 --> 00:01:32,892
I dunno, Zortex, probably
another cow or farmer.
29
00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:36,063
Whatever it is,
get ready for probes city!
30
00:01:37,363 --> 00:01:38,998
[ Roaring ]
31
00:01:39,065 --> 00:01:40,767
Oh, fuck!
Oh, fuck!
32
00:01:40,834 --> 00:01:42,835
Aah!
33
00:01:42,902 --> 00:01:44,637
[ Screaming ]
34
00:01:44,704 --> 00:01:46,672
[ Splat ]
35
00:01:46,739 --> 00:01:48,808
I regret everything!
36
00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:53,846
[ Roaring ]
37
00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:54,914
[ Beeping ]
38
00:01:54,981 --> 00:01:57,517
[ Warbling ]
39
00:01:57,584 --> 00:02:00,153
Courage sure looks relaxed.
40
00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:01,387
Ahh.
41
00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:03,457
Oh, how many Prozac
did you give him?
42
00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:05,158
Enough.
43
00:02:05,225 --> 00:02:07,159
Oh!
[ Roaring ]
44
00:02:07,226 --> 00:02:09,396
Stupid dog!
Help us!
45
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,564
He can't! The Prozac!
46
00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:13,166
That's gonna leave a mark!
47
00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:14,300
Oh, my!
48
00:02:14,367 --> 00:02:16,702
Ah!
Stupid Prozac!
49
00:02:16,769 --> 00:02:19,271
[ Courage sighs contentedly ]
50
00:02:19,338 --> 00:02:21,842
♪ I've been a bad, bad dog ♪
51
00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:23,809
♪ Bad dog ♪
52
00:02:23,876 --> 00:02:27,313
♪ I've been a careless
man's best friend ♪
53
00:02:27,380 --> 00:02:29,715
-♪ Woof ♪
-♪ Oh ♪
54
00:02:29,782 --> 00:02:31,984
So I said we should all pitch in
on a coffee maker,
55
00:02:32,051 --> 00:02:34,220
since we all enjoy coffee.
Coffee maker?
56
00:02:34,287 --> 00:02:35,755
That's what I said.
[ Squeaking ]
57
00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:36,755
It's General Leia!
58
00:02:36,822 --> 00:02:38,124
She's right outside
the window!
59
00:02:38,191 --> 00:02:40,426
Move the ship!
We need to help her inside!
60
00:02:40,493 --> 00:02:42,061
I hear we might
get a coffee maker.
61
00:02:42,128 --> 00:02:44,564
Well, it makes sense.
We all enjoy coffee.
62
00:02:44,631 --> 00:02:45,998
[ Thud ]
Oh, my God!
63
00:02:46,065 --> 00:02:47,767
Man: Damn it,
we got to catch up to her!
64
00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:48,935
Man: Pull up alongside her,
65
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,335
we can pull her through
the side door.
66
00:02:50,402 --> 00:02:52,037
Man: Yeah, let's open
the door to space!
67
00:02:52,104 --> 00:02:54,340
That should have
no consequences.
68
00:02:54,407 --> 00:02:57,042
I can't reach her.
Turn the ship.
69
00:02:57,109 --> 00:02:58,945
Aah, no,
that was too fast!
70
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:00,613
[ Thudding ]
71
00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,482
She's coming back!
Turn the ship again!
72
00:03:02,549 --> 00:03:05,017
♪♪
73
00:03:05,084 --> 00:03:09,288
Come on, come on,
almost there, come on.
74
00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,457
Yay!
Excited cheering!
75
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:13,159
What did I miss?
76
00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:15,061
We're getting a coffee maker!
77
00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:16,428
[ Shopkeeper's bell rings ]
78
00:03:16,495 --> 00:03:19,398
Ah, Squall Leonhart,
I heard you were coming to town,
79
00:03:19,465 --> 00:03:22,601
but I didn't dare dream
you'd walk into my humble store!
80
00:03:22,668 --> 00:03:25,170
I am always looking for new
and unusual weapons.
81
00:03:25,237 --> 00:03:28,575
For you see, I'm the master
of...zapow!
82
00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:30,643
The gun blade!
83
00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:32,879
Cuts like a sword,
and when I pull the trigger,
84
00:03:32,946 --> 00:03:35,481
it vibrates extra hard --
bzzt!
85
00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:39,151
Inflicting super mega damage
on my foes!
86
00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:42,154
I doubt you have anything
for sale as cool as this.
87
00:03:42,221 --> 00:03:43,422
Ah, don't be so sure --
88
00:03:43,489 --> 00:03:44,924
[ Crash, roaring ]
89
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:47,193
Aah! Aah!
Fuckin' bear!
90
00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:49,729
Oh, Goddamnit, ahh!
[ Vibrating ]
91
00:03:49,796 --> 00:03:51,964
[ Munch, squelches ]
92
00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:54,200
[ Roars, hatch squeaks
and thuds ]
93
00:03:54,267 --> 00:03:56,001
[ Whooshing ]
94
00:03:56,068 --> 00:03:59,239
Ugh, all right, Neo, you can
make your one phone call.
95
00:03:59,306 --> 00:04:00,706
Thank you.
96
00:04:00,773 --> 00:04:04,443
Connection, disappearing.
Hey!
97
00:04:04,510 --> 00:04:08,114
♪ I'm only a bill,
yes, simply a bill ♪
98
00:04:08,181 --> 00:04:09,648
Whoa!
Wow.
99
00:04:09,715 --> 00:04:11,083
Stealing the Declaration
of Independence
100
00:04:11,150 --> 00:04:12,718
was easier than I thought.
101
00:04:12,785 --> 00:04:15,588
It's inside, you idiot!
102
00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:18,024
Now, where did that
little anthropomorphic
103
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,759
rolled up piece of paper go?
104
00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:23,295
Wait, was it never here?
Am I having an acid flashback?
105
00:04:23,362 --> 00:04:26,533
Oh, my God, I'm freaking out!
This stupid Prozac!
106
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:30,236
[ Screaming ]
107
00:04:30,303 --> 00:04:31,371
[ Blade rings, bear roars ]
108
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:32,906
[ Sword vibrating,
man screaming ]
109
00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,340
[ Roar, munch ]
110
00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:37,243
[ Grunting, sword vibrating ]
111
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:42,281
[ Cartoony sound effects ]
112
00:04:42,348 --> 00:04:44,550
I am the terror that
quack in the night!
113
00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:47,019
I am the poison ivy rash
on the nuts
114
00:04:47,086 --> 00:04:48,921
that ruined your hunting trip!
115
00:04:48,988 --> 00:04:50,723
Now that Darkwing Duck
is here --
116
00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:52,658
[ Gunshot ]
Jesus! Gah, what the --
117
00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:56,028
[ Groaning ]
118
00:04:56,095 --> 00:04:57,597
[ Gunshot ]
119
00:04:57,664 --> 00:04:59,599
Flapping ineffectively --
I'm a duck!
120
00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:01,267
Why the hell can't I
get out of here?!
121
00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:03,969
Gah, shoulder hit!
Highly survivable.
122
00:05:04,036 --> 00:05:06,105
Okay, D.W.,
ready to hit the road?
123
00:05:06,172 --> 00:05:07,340
[ Gunshot ]
Aah!
124
00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:09,341
Launchpad, is that you?
125
00:05:09,408 --> 00:05:10,844
[ Gunshot ]
Oh, God, why?!
126
00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,512
Uncle Scrooge?
Aah!
127
00:05:12,579 --> 00:05:14,013
Dewey!
[ Gunshot ]
128
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:18,184
♪♪
129
00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:20,286
Greetings, viewers!
130
00:05:20,353 --> 00:05:22,289
You may call me the Lookie-Loo,
131
00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:24,256
for that is my name.
132
00:05:24,323 --> 00:05:27,694
I have transported you
to my battle dome
133
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:30,997
on the planet Iowyo.
134
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:34,167
[ Roaring, flames roar ]
135
00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:36,835
This is Fang Banger!
136
00:05:36,902 --> 00:05:38,937
He will soon destroy
your planet.
137
00:05:39,004 --> 00:05:43,008
Only Earth's strongest
can hope to stop him.
138
00:05:43,075 --> 00:05:46,679
But who is your
mightiest super team?
139
00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:51,917
Let the Secret Infinity Contest
of Crisis Champions begin!
140
00:05:51,984 --> 00:05:56,722
♪ Secret Infinity Contest of
Motherfuckin' Crisis Champions ♪
141
00:05:56,789 --> 00:05:59,792
♪ Cha-cha-cha Cheese League,
Cheese League, baby! ♪
142
00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:02,628
Colby!
The leader and the brain!
143
00:06:02,695 --> 00:06:05,297
Cheddar!
He's straight up making it rain!
144
00:06:05,364 --> 00:06:08,067
Brie! Sexy mama
with a Southern sass!
145
00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:11,037
Muenster! Buff and handsome,
bustin' ass!
146
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,672
And don't forget about
Baby Swiss!
147
00:06:13,739 --> 00:06:17,343
♪ Baby! Cha-cha-cha-cha-cha
Cheese League! ♪
148
00:06:17,410 --> 00:06:19,878
♪ Squatch Squad, Squatch Squad ♪
149
00:06:19,945 --> 00:06:22,749
♪ come get your crotch gnawed
by the Squatch Squad ♪
150
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:23,883
Bigfoot!
151
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,519
Peace on Earth is his goal!
152
00:06:25,586 --> 00:06:26,686
Spacesquatch!
153
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:28,120
He's comin' for
your black hole!
154
00:06:28,187 --> 00:06:29,355
Batsquatch!
155
00:06:29,422 --> 00:06:30,957
Echolocates with sonar!
156
00:06:31,024 --> 00:06:33,560
-Skunk Ape!
-He's got a stinky faux-nar!
157
00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:34,728
Sheep Squatch!
158
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,262
Don't you call him a lamb!
159
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,698
-Blurryfoot!
-Never caught on cam!
160
00:06:38,765 --> 00:06:42,034
♪ Squatch Squad, baby,
Squatch Squad! ♪
161
00:06:42,101 --> 00:06:45,571
♪ Road Hawgs, grab a cheese log
and roll these dawgs ♪
162
00:06:45,638 --> 00:06:47,240
♪ They're the Road Hawgs ♪
163
00:06:47,307 --> 00:06:49,442
-Man Pig!
-More man than pig!
164
00:06:49,509 --> 00:06:51,978
-Pig Man!
-Favorite Newton fig!
165
00:06:52,045 --> 00:06:54,146
-Flank!
-Favorite Campbell knee!
166
00:06:54,213 --> 00:06:56,148
And don't forget about Steve!
167
00:06:56,215 --> 00:06:59,885
♪ Road Hawgs, up your fucking
ass with Road Hawgs! ♪
168
00:06:59,952 --> 00:07:03,589
♪ Hang on to your ass, here
comes Bigfoot in Bigfoot! ♪
169
00:07:03,656 --> 00:07:05,791
♪ One's a beast
and one's a truck ♪
170
00:07:05,858 --> 00:07:09,829
♪ Yes, we know you already saw
Bigfoot on that other team ♪
171
00:07:09,896 --> 00:07:11,431
♪ But this one's different! ♪
172
00:07:11,498 --> 00:07:13,499
♪ Bigfoot in Bigfoot! ♪
173
00:07:13,566 --> 00:07:16,135
♪ You won't get chiseled by
the Marble Mob ♪
174
00:07:16,202 --> 00:07:18,838
♪ Gettin' their rocks off
on the job ♪
175
00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:21,607
♪ Marble Mob, Marble Mob ♪
176
00:07:21,674 --> 00:07:23,676
-David!
-A straight-up masterpiece!
177
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:25,211
-Venus de Milo!
-Don't need arms
178
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,712
to bitch-slap your niece!
179
00:07:26,779 --> 00:07:29,047
-The Thinker.
-He's gonna blow your mind!
180
00:07:29,114 --> 00:07:31,817
-Manneken Pis!
-His pee will make you blind!
181
00:07:31,884 --> 00:07:34,820
-Abe Lincoln!
-He invented basketball?
182
00:07:34,887 --> 00:07:36,622
♪ Marble Mob,
don't be a slob ♪
183
00:07:36,689 --> 00:07:41,561
♪ You idiotic knob-job, get down
with the Marble Mob! ♪
184
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,962
Now then,
185
00:07:44,029 --> 00:07:46,365
the tournament grid
will be divided thusly.
186
00:07:46,432 --> 00:07:50,003
Warning, warning, oxygen levels
approaching fatal minimums.
187
00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:51,638
[ Grunts ]
188
00:07:51,705 --> 00:07:54,907
[ Alarm blaring ]
189
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:56,276
Baa!
[ Gunshot ]
190
00:07:56,343 --> 00:07:58,811
[ Alarm blaring ]
191
00:07:58,878 --> 00:08:01,114
Sorry, the Fang Banger will
definitely eat
192
00:08:01,181 --> 00:08:02,281
the entire earth now.
193
00:08:02,348 --> 00:08:03,983
We gave it
the old college try, though.
194
00:08:04,050 --> 00:08:05,485
That's what's important.
195
00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:06,819
Peace out, yo!
196
00:08:06,886 --> 00:08:08,554
[ Beeping ]
197
00:08:08,621 --> 00:08:09,889
Fuckin' bear!
198
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:13,225
[ Roaring ]
199
00:08:13,292 --> 00:08:16,428
Bored with the same old Easter?
Yeah!
200
00:08:16,495 --> 00:08:19,266
Resurrection of Christ
not holding their attention?
201
00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:20,867
It sure isn't!
202
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:23,803
Now Easter can really
get hoppin'!
203
00:08:23,870 --> 00:08:25,938
God sacrificed his only son,
204
00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:28,775
so you won't have
to sacrifice the fun.
205
00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,509
Mom and Dad love to hop,
206
00:08:30,576 --> 00:08:32,779
even Grandma just can't stop!
207
00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:36,949
The Jesus Pogo Sticks
commercial aired to
208
00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:39,117
a world wide
Super Bowl audience.
209
00:08:39,184 --> 00:08:42,355
And at that precise moment,
the rapture began.
210
00:08:42,422 --> 00:08:45,392
God could take no more.
211
00:08:45,892 --> 00:08:48,894
[ Adventure music ]
212
00:08:48,961 --> 00:08:50,396
Mind control tigers?
213
00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:52,998
You're usually more of
a snake guy.
214
00:08:53,065 --> 00:08:57,870
I know, but my exotic animal guy
had a deal on tigers
215
00:08:57,937 --> 00:09:00,007
I couldn't pass-ss up.
216
00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:04,577
We can't go hand-to-hand
with tigers, Duke!
217
00:09:04,644 --> 00:09:05,978
We're not trained
to deal with them!
218
00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:07,713
Luckily, we have someone
who is --
219
00:09:07,780 --> 00:09:10,383
I'd like to introduce our newest
recruit -- everyone, meet
220
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:13,619
Joe-e-e Exotic!
221
00:09:13,686 --> 00:09:15,621
Howdy, Joes, y'all,
we're looking for someone
222
00:09:15,688 --> 00:09:18,657
who knows how to handle tigers
and gaslight two meth addicted
223
00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:20,527
husbands,
you've got a bull's eye.
224
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:22,328
Okay, let's get to
that machine
225
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,731
and destroy it
before it's too late.
226
00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:27,466
Yo, Joe!
227
00:09:27,533 --> 00:09:28,969
Here we go, attack, hut, hut!
228
00:09:29,036 --> 00:09:30,036
We're under attack!
229
00:09:30,103 --> 00:09:32,238
Mind control button push!
230
00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:34,174
[ Sinister laugh ]
231
00:09:34,241 --> 00:09:37,477
Tigers, kill all the Joes!
232
00:09:37,544 --> 00:09:39,379
[ Roaring ]
233
00:09:39,446 --> 00:09:40,947
The tigers are coming!
234
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:43,149
Aah!
My arm!
235
00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:45,017
Go, go, go.
Flank 'em to the right!
236
00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:47,153
Flank 'em to the left!
Oh!
237
00:09:47,220 --> 00:09:49,622
You gotta --
you gotta do something!
238
00:09:49,689 --> 00:09:51,023
[ Playing Country tune ]
239
00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:53,092
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
240
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:57,063
♪ Fuckin' papa's
gonna sing you a song ♪
241
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:58,798
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
242
00:09:58,865 --> 00:10:03,102
♪ Can't we all just get along? ♪
243
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:05,772
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
-Aah! Cobra kitties!
244
00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:08,207
♪ It's time to let Cobra go ♪
245
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:11,678
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
246
00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:15,381
♪ It's time to be a G.I. Joe ♪
247
00:10:15,447 --> 00:10:18,551
Way to go, Exotic -- now it's
you who controls the tigers!
248
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,453
Girl, I've always controlled
these tigers.
249
00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:22,955
Kill that fucking Cobra asshole!
250
00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:24,723
Oh! Run away!
251
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:28,661
Somebody stop
these stupid cats!
252
00:10:28,728 --> 00:10:30,864
Oh! Oh! Run away!
253
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:32,464
Way to go, Joe!
254
00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:35,968
How do you get that tight
outfit on and can I watch?
255
00:10:36,035 --> 00:10:39,806
Look here, Carol, this machine
you sold me doesn't work.
256
00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:42,307
What happened
to the Baskin guarantee?
257
00:10:42,374 --> 00:10:45,978
Well, cats and kittens,
it worked on my husband.
258
00:10:46,045 --> 00:10:48,515
It should work just fine.
259
00:10:48,582 --> 00:10:50,349
Oh, my God.
She admitted it.
260
00:10:50,416 --> 00:10:51,384
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
261
00:10:51,451 --> 00:10:52,718
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
262
00:10:52,785 --> 00:10:54,620
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
263
00:10:54,687 --> 00:10:55,788
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
264
00:10:55,855 --> 00:10:57,122
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
265
00:10:57,189 --> 00:10:58,958
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
266
00:10:59,025 --> 00:10:59,959
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
267
00:11:00,026 --> 00:11:01,293
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
268
00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:03,296
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
269
00:11:03,362 --> 00:11:05,499
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
270
00:11:08,201 --> 00:11:09,503
Stoopid Monkey.
19128
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