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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,116 --> 00:00:03,882 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:06,161 --> 00:00:09,417 ♪ I'm gonna buy a paper doll ♪ 3 00:00:09,418 --> 00:00:13,254 ♪ That I can call my own ♪ 4 00:00:13,626 --> 00:00:18,731 ♪ A doll that other fellows cannot steal ♪ 5 00:00:19,444 --> 00:00:22,247 ♪ And then the flirty, flirty guys ♪ 6 00:00:22,248 --> 00:00:24,422 - Good morning, Dottie. - Good morning, Sue Anne. 7 00:00:24,423 --> 00:00:26,860 ♪ Flirty, flirty eyes ♪ 8 00:00:26,861 --> 00:00:31,638 ♪ Will have to flirt with dollies that are real ♪ 9 00:00:33,448 --> 00:00:39,232 ♪ When I come home at night she will be waiting ♪ 10 00:00:40,037 --> 00:00:44,218 ♪ She'll be the truest doll in all this world ♪ 11 00:00:44,219 --> 00:00:46,007 - All right, thank you. - Not a problem. 12 00:00:46,008 --> 00:00:49,969 ♪ I'd rather have a paper doll ♪ 13 00:00:50,290 --> 00:00:52,821 ♪ To call my own ♪ 14 00:00:52,846 --> 00:00:57,874 ♪ Than have a fickle-minded real live girl ♪ 15 00:00:57,899 --> 00:01:03,049 ♪ ♪ 16 00:01:09,147 --> 00:01:10,147 DUCKETT: Doctor. 17 00:01:28,316 --> 00:01:30,134 INVESTIGATOR: Can you tell us precisely what your fight 18 00:01:30,158 --> 00:01:32,236 with McWatt on the tarmac was about? 19 00:01:32,970 --> 00:01:33,970 Happiness. 20 00:01:34,949 --> 00:01:37,150 INVESTIGATOR: Happiness? Your fight was about happiness? 21 00:01:37,361 --> 00:01:39,142 That was one of the themes, yes. 22 00:01:39,982 --> 00:01:41,712 That's where it ended up, anyway. 23 00:01:43,923 --> 00:01:47,056 INVESTIGATOR: Would you say that McWatt was disturbed? 24 00:01:48,050 --> 00:01:49,050 Yes. 25 00:01:50,064 --> 00:01:54,407 INVESTIGATOR: And would you say he was mentally unwell? 26 00:01:55,661 --> 00:01:58,032 Sure, yeah. Yeah, why not? 27 00:01:58,809 --> 00:02:00,409 INVESTIGATOR: Would you call him insane? 28 00:02:01,176 --> 00:02:02,176 Aren't we all? 29 00:02:06,259 --> 00:02:09,423 And would you say McWatt's insanity led to the death of Kid Sampson? 30 00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,029 Yes. 31 00:02:13,868 --> 00:02:15,636 INVESTIGATOR: And would you agree the United States 32 00:02:15,637 --> 00:02:17,866 military is in no way responsible 33 00:02:17,867 --> 00:02:21,615 for McWatt's insanity that led to the death of Kid Sampson? 34 00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:24,444 I would say the United States military is entirely 35 00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:28,227 responsible for McWatt's insanity that led to the death of Kid Sampson. 36 00:02:28,369 --> 00:02:30,274 KORN: Answer the question. 37 00:02:30,436 --> 00:02:31,436 I just did. 38 00:02:49,313 --> 00:02:51,224 INVESTIGATOR: Can you positively identify these 39 00:02:51,225 --> 00:02:54,782 to be the bodies of Lieutenants Sampson and McWatt? 40 00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:56,508 Positively? 41 00:02:57,001 --> 00:02:58,795 INVESTIGATOR: Simply yes or no will suffice. 42 00:03:00,818 --> 00:03:02,838 Well, I can't really give you a simple yes or no. 43 00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:05,434 I'm... 44 00:03:07,459 --> 00:03:10,529 20% positive that's Kid Sampson, and I'm... 45 00:03:11,565 --> 00:03:12,565 I don't know... 46 00:03:14,390 --> 00:03:15,959 10% on McWatt. 47 00:03:18,259 --> 00:03:19,780 INVESTIGATOR: I'll take that as a yes. 48 00:03:23,114 --> 00:03:26,077 [TRUCK ENGINE RUMBLING] 49 00:03:26,857 --> 00:03:28,577 - DUCKETT: Thank you, bye. - YOSSARIAN: Oh. 50 00:03:29,043 --> 00:03:30,803 Hi, hi. 51 00:03:31,264 --> 00:03:32,507 Uh, can I talk to you? 52 00:03:32,508 --> 00:03:33,928 Hi, sure. 53 00:03:34,396 --> 00:03:38,021 So, I think maybe you and I are the only two sane people on this base. 54 00:03:38,501 --> 00:03:40,665 Sane person? Here? Okay. 55 00:03:41,431 --> 00:03:42,931 I can't take this anymore. 56 00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:45,199 And I think I've figured out a way to get out of here, 57 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:46,827 and I just wanna see how it registers 58 00:03:46,828 --> 00:03:48,563 on a sane person's face. 59 00:03:48,874 --> 00:03:50,751 Wow, I'm... I'm almost flattered. 60 00:03:51,298 --> 00:03:54,602 So, as it stands, I still have 11 missions left to fly. 61 00:03:55,011 --> 00:03:58,268 Cathcart'll raise the missions, clearly. It's a behavioral pattern. 62 00:03:58,476 --> 00:04:01,147 But I'm gonna do those 11 so fast in secret, 63 00:04:01,148 --> 00:04:02,300 he won't even know. 64 00:04:02,389 --> 00:04:04,042 And I won't log them on the day. 65 00:04:04,198 --> 00:04:06,846 I'll log them all at once after I've flown them, 66 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:10,151 and then I'm gone before he even knows what happened. 67 00:04:11,823 --> 00:04:15,467 So, just to get this straight, your... your plan to get out 68 00:04:15,468 --> 00:04:19,249 of here is to fly all of the missions you're required to fly anyway? 69 00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:20,553 Yeah, that's my plan. 70 00:04:21,272 --> 00:04:23,475 Just, really fast. 71 00:04:24,178 --> 00:04:26,824 [ANITA O'DAY'S "MASSACHUSETTS"] 72 00:04:26,825 --> 00:04:30,584 ♪ ♪ 73 00:04:36,803 --> 00:04:38,013 - Heya, fella. - Hey. 74 00:04:38,038 --> 00:04:39,599 What say I fly this one for you? 75 00:04:39,881 --> 00:04:40,935 - BOMBARDIER: Why? - I don't know. 76 00:04:40,936 --> 00:04:42,154 I'm just itching to get up there. 77 00:04:42,439 --> 00:04:44,400 BOMBARDIER: All right. I'm gonna go swimming, then. 78 00:04:44,401 --> 00:04:45,404 Appreciate it. 79 00:04:45,654 --> 00:04:47,041 Take that to work. 80 00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:50,979 ♪ ♪ 81 00:04:51,788 --> 00:04:53,251 All right. 82 00:04:53,276 --> 00:04:56,030 ♪ ♪ 83 00:04:56,628 --> 00:04:57,781 And... 84 00:04:57,970 --> 00:05:00,767 ♪ ♪ 85 00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:03,674 ♪ When the porter yells Massachusetts ♪ 86 00:05:03,916 --> 00:05:07,361 Bombs away. All right, that's it. We're done. Pull up. 87 00:05:07,386 --> 00:05:09,445 ♪ Homesick as can be, Massachusetts ♪ 88 00:05:09,470 --> 00:05:10,962 YOSSARIAN: Pull up harder, please. 89 00:05:12,658 --> 00:05:13,936 Hey, uh, what's your name, again? 90 00:05:14,525 --> 00:05:16,715 BOBBY: Munster. Bobby Munster. 91 00:05:17,103 --> 00:05:18,454 Nice job, Bobby Munster. 92 00:05:19,275 --> 00:05:22,184 ♪ How my heart will knock Massachusetts ♪ 93 00:05:22,185 --> 00:05:25,190 ♪ To see Plymouth Rock Massachusetts ♪ 94 00:05:25,191 --> 00:05:28,280 ♪ Want to roam around Massachusetts ♪ 95 00:05:28,281 --> 00:05:31,579 ♪ In Nantucket town Massachusetts ♪ 96 00:05:35,588 --> 00:05:37,549 ♪ ♪ 97 00:05:37,550 --> 00:05:40,731 ♪ You can't guess how much it means for me to be... ♪ 98 00:05:40,756 --> 00:05:42,660 - YOSSARIAN: Bombs away. - [CANNONS BOOMING] 99 00:05:42,685 --> 00:05:44,542 [BOMBS SHRIEKING] 100 00:05:45,732 --> 00:05:47,986 Hey, there he is, the king of the clouds. 101 00:05:47,987 --> 00:05:49,280 YOSSARIAN: Hey, fellas. 102 00:05:49,281 --> 00:05:51,324 New Kid Sampson, New McWatt. 103 00:05:52,433 --> 00:05:55,237 John Yossarian. John Yossarian. 104 00:05:56,034 --> 00:05:58,096 ♪ Just like Jack and Jill... ♪ 105 00:05:58,121 --> 00:05:59,477 Come on, you fuck. 106 00:06:00,017 --> 00:06:02,322 - Release. - Okay, take us out! 107 00:06:02,347 --> 00:06:03,827 ♪ Spread the news around ♪ 108 00:06:03,852 --> 00:06:07,358 ♪ I'm Massachusetts bound ♪ 109 00:06:07,359 --> 00:06:11,625 ♪ ♪ 110 00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:18,923 YOSSARIAN: Heya, boys. Let's do it. 111 00:06:45,307 --> 00:06:46,374 Release. 112 00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:56,790 [PLANE ENGINE DRONING] 113 00:06:57,135 --> 00:06:58,978 ♪ As you walk to Lexing... ♪ 114 00:06:59,003 --> 00:07:00,590 [SWITCH CLICKS, MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY] 115 00:07:01,161 --> 00:07:03,596 [INHALES DEEPLY] 116 00:07:05,386 --> 00:07:08,421 [EERIE SILENCE] 117 00:07:12,698 --> 00:07:15,452 [INSTRUMENTS CLICKING] 118 00:07:15,453 --> 00:07:18,667 [EERIE SILENCE] 119 00:07:18,668 --> 00:07:20,964 [INSTRUMENTS CLICKING] 120 00:07:34,893 --> 00:07:36,010 [EXHALES] 121 00:07:37,330 --> 00:07:38,331 [METALLIC CREAK] 122 00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,586 [EXHALES DEEPLY] 123 00:07:40,587 --> 00:07:41,630 [LEVER CLICKS] 124 00:07:41,631 --> 00:07:44,637 [EERIE SILENCE] 125 00:07:48,604 --> 00:07:50,300 [BOOMING] 126 00:07:50,879 --> 00:07:52,573 [GLENN MILLER'S "IN THE MOOD"] 127 00:07:52,598 --> 00:07:55,383 Yes, that's it! That's it for me! 128 00:07:55,408 --> 00:07:57,452 I'm going home, fellas! 129 00:07:57,453 --> 00:07:59,039 ♪ ♪ 130 00:07:59,129 --> 00:08:00,520 You hear that? 131 00:08:01,588 --> 00:08:03,549 [GROANS] I'm going home. 132 00:08:03,550 --> 00:08:05,260 - What's your name, again? - JOSEPH: Joseph, sir. 133 00:08:05,261 --> 00:08:07,807 I'm going home, Joseph. I won. 134 00:08:07,808 --> 00:08:09,185 I won! 135 00:08:09,186 --> 00:08:11,899 ♪ ♪ 136 00:08:11,900 --> 00:08:14,314 - I hear someone's going home. - Oh, you hear right. 137 00:08:14,947 --> 00:08:16,742 - SMOKER: Go get 'em, Yo-Yo. - I will. 138 00:08:16,743 --> 00:08:19,873 ♪ ♪ 139 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:23,255 [WHISTLING] 140 00:08:28,657 --> 00:08:29,657 Hi. 141 00:08:29,797 --> 00:08:31,055 CLERK: Haven't seen you in a while. 142 00:08:31,134 --> 00:08:33,107 - YOSSARIAN: Yeah. - Been in the hospital again? 143 00:08:33,108 --> 00:08:35,195 I have not. I have not, no. 144 00:08:35,196 --> 00:08:37,951 I have been flying. 145 00:08:43,322 --> 00:08:44,322 For your signing. 146 00:08:48,861 --> 00:08:51,006 - You're giving me these all at once? - All at once. 147 00:08:52,187 --> 00:08:53,733 There's 11 missions there. 148 00:09:00,947 --> 00:09:02,936 - Count 'em. - CLERK: Interesting way of doing it. 149 00:09:03,904 --> 00:09:05,545 11 in a row. 150 00:09:05,570 --> 00:09:08,139 I figure I'd save you a whole lot of work if, you know, 151 00:09:08,164 --> 00:09:09,398 I gave them to you all at once. 152 00:09:10,850 --> 00:09:11,866 How thoughtful. 153 00:09:16,278 --> 00:09:18,282 [YOSSARIAN WHISTLING] 154 00:09:25,505 --> 00:09:27,421 YOSSARIAN: A good day to you, Colonel. 155 00:09:28,019 --> 00:09:29,773 This makes 50 missions, sir. 156 00:09:31,058 --> 00:09:34,265 - Wait, you've flown... - YOSSARIAN: 11 missions. 157 00:09:34,714 --> 00:09:36,878 - 11 missions? - That's right, sir. 158 00:09:36,903 --> 00:09:38,190 In six days. 159 00:09:38,847 --> 00:09:40,292 KORN: That's not even possible. 160 00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:42,491 That's 11 missions, sir. 161 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,418 YOSSARIAN: They're... they're all stamped, sir. 162 00:09:46,059 --> 00:09:47,120 Who gave you permission? 163 00:09:47,145 --> 00:09:49,385 I've just been making myself available, sir. 164 00:09:49,386 --> 00:09:51,347 There's always somebody with the stomach bug 165 00:09:51,348 --> 00:09:53,301 or a headache or a hangover. 166 00:09:53,506 --> 00:09:55,379 And I'm just doing what I can to help. 167 00:09:56,379 --> 00:09:57,449 Just doing my bit. 168 00:09:58,543 --> 00:09:59,961 This is highly irregular. 169 00:10:00,032 --> 00:10:01,035 Yes, sir. 170 00:10:01,703 --> 00:10:04,710 And when can I expect to receive my discharge papers, sir? 171 00:10:04,874 --> 00:10:07,003 Well, as soon as I've stamped your paperwork. 172 00:10:07,028 --> 00:10:08,028 YOSSARIAN: Yes, sir. 173 00:10:09,832 --> 00:10:10,951 Should I wait here? 174 00:10:14,394 --> 00:10:17,274 There's a process that proceeds the actual stamping 175 00:10:17,275 --> 00:10:18,651 - of the stamp. - Yes, sir. 176 00:10:18,676 --> 00:10:20,799 KORN: We'll notify you once that process 177 00:10:20,824 --> 00:10:21,878 - is complete. - Thank you, sir. 178 00:10:21,903 --> 00:10:24,020 - Is that sufficient? - YOSSARIAN: Thank you very much, sir. 179 00:10:24,045 --> 00:10:25,088 You're welcome. 180 00:10:28,991 --> 00:10:29,991 Uh-huh. 181 00:10:31,474 --> 00:10:34,242 [GLENN MILLER'S "IN THE MOOD"] 182 00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:37,787 ♪ ♪ 183 00:10:45,441 --> 00:10:46,967 YOSSARIAN: Yes! 184 00:11:09,132 --> 00:11:10,741 Hey, Yo-Yo! 185 00:11:11,553 --> 00:11:12,615 YOSSARIAN: What are you doing? 186 00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:15,241 We went down. I was on a training run with these fellas. 187 00:11:15,242 --> 00:11:18,015 Fellas, this is Yossarian. Jump on, Yo-Yo. 188 00:11:21,571 --> 00:11:25,742 We were... we were looping out past Sardinia in the new B-25. 189 00:11:25,829 --> 00:11:28,834 It's got a new Holley carburetor which cruises lean 190 00:11:28,835 --> 00:11:31,213 but the bypass valve is diaphragm-operated, 191 00:11:31,214 --> 00:11:32,649 which I did not know. 192 00:11:32,799 --> 00:11:35,532 The old ones have a baffle in the air-mixing chamber 193 00:11:35,557 --> 00:11:37,563 and that's the one I'm used to, obviously. 194 00:11:38,145 --> 00:11:41,066 But now there's this self-sealing CCU 195 00:11:41,067 --> 00:11:44,114 strapped on to the bomb bay, and the fuel gets transferred 196 00:11:44,115 --> 00:11:45,868 by an electric centrifuge pump. 197 00:11:45,869 --> 00:11:47,538 And if you did not know that... [MIMICS FARTING NOISE] 198 00:11:47,804 --> 00:11:49,806 You're not gonna prime it. So... 199 00:11:51,421 --> 00:11:53,173 Perfect belly landing. 200 00:11:54,228 --> 00:11:56,399 And I learned something new for next time. 201 00:11:59,103 --> 00:12:01,065 Well, I didn't know you'd gone. 202 00:12:01,066 --> 00:12:02,318 But welcome back. 203 00:12:04,284 --> 00:12:07,452 ♪ Oh give me land lots of land ♪ 204 00:12:07,453 --> 00:12:10,249 ♪ Under starry skies above ♪ 205 00:12:10,250 --> 00:12:13,715 ♪ Don't fence me in ♪ 206 00:12:13,885 --> 00:12:18,751 ♪ Let me ride through the wide open country that I love ♪ 207 00:12:18,776 --> 00:12:22,190 ♪ Don't fence me in ♪ 208 00:12:22,191 --> 00:12:27,158 ♪ Let me be by myself in the evening breeze ♪ 209 00:12:27,159 --> 00:12:31,458 ♪ Listen to the murmur of the cottonwood trees ♪ 210 00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:35,926 ♪ Send me off forever but I ask you please ♪ 211 00:12:35,927 --> 00:12:38,431 ♪ Don't fence me in ♪ 212 00:12:38,432 --> 00:12:40,602 ♪ Just turn me loose ♪ 213 00:12:40,603 --> 00:12:46,740 ♪ Let me straddle my old saddle underneath the western skies ♪ 214 00:12:46,741 --> 00:12:51,415 ♪ On my Cayuse let me wander over yonder ♪ 215 00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:55,175 ♪ Till I see the mountains rise ♪ 216 00:12:55,752 --> 00:13:01,579 ♪ I want to ride to the ridge where the west commences ♪ 217 00:13:01,784 --> 00:13:05,944 ♪ Gaze at the moon till I lose my senses ♪ 218 00:13:06,096 --> 00:13:09,409 ♪ Can't look at hobbles and I can't stand... ♪ 219 00:13:09,487 --> 00:13:11,581 Knock, knock. How you doing, Yo-Yo? 220 00:13:11,606 --> 00:13:13,574 - Stupendous. - Heard you went down yesterday. 221 00:13:13,742 --> 00:13:15,621 - Sure did. - Good for you. 222 00:13:15,902 --> 00:13:16,949 I need to call in my favor. 223 00:13:18,350 --> 00:13:19,350 What is it? 224 00:13:19,383 --> 00:13:21,226 MILO: I'm gonna go buy some things. I need you to come with me. 225 00:13:21,287 --> 00:13:22,594 - Where? - MILO: Everywhere. 226 00:13:22,684 --> 00:13:23,992 - YOSSARIAN: When? - MILO: Gotta leave in an hour. 227 00:13:24,017 --> 00:13:25,516 I can't. I'm going home. 228 00:13:25,862 --> 00:13:26,972 You're going home? 229 00:13:26,997 --> 00:13:28,963 I'm just waiting on a stamp, but... 230 00:13:29,884 --> 00:13:31,830 - But, why do you need me? - MILO: Come on, it'll be fun. 231 00:13:31,855 --> 00:13:32,932 It'll be like a vacation. 232 00:13:33,940 --> 00:13:35,979 You won't have to lift anything heavy. I promise. 233 00:13:39,604 --> 00:13:40,604 Can I come? 234 00:13:41,174 --> 00:13:44,262 [PLANE ENGINES RUMBLING] 235 00:13:44,287 --> 00:13:45,873 MILO: Yeah, she handles nice, right? 236 00:13:46,311 --> 00:13:48,824 - ORR: I'm impressed. - MILO: It's outstanding craftsmanship. 237 00:13:48,849 --> 00:13:50,405 That's the Germans for you, though. 238 00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:53,114 Every little detail. Hey, look at this stitching. 239 00:13:53,139 --> 00:13:55,444 Here. Huh? This is high-quality leather. 240 00:13:55,469 --> 00:13:56,762 You see this, Yossarian? 241 00:13:56,849 --> 00:13:58,155 Very high quality. 242 00:13:58,372 --> 00:14:00,950 LORENZO: Milo Minderbinder, Milo Minderbinder, me ascolta? 243 00:14:01,017 --> 00:14:03,229 Hello, this is Milo Minderbinder. 244 00:14:03,254 --> 00:14:04,588 LUCA: [RAMBLES IN ITALIAN] 245 00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:06,591 Ah, Luca. How are you, my friend? 246 00:14:07,919 --> 00:14:10,309 Wait, slow down, Luca. Slow down. 247 00:14:10,334 --> 00:14:12,438 - LUCA: Sto parlando con le... - Uh-huh. 248 00:14:12,604 --> 00:14:14,889 - LUCA: Cinquecento animali! - Uh-huh. 249 00:14:14,914 --> 00:14:16,103 LUCA: Queste la ferme. 250 00:14:16,546 --> 00:14:19,217 Well, that was the agreement we had. 500 goats. 251 00:14:19,242 --> 00:14:20,787 LUCA: Ha già iniziato a uccidere. 252 00:14:20,788 --> 00:14:23,006 Tell him to hold his horses. I'm actually... 253 00:14:23,209 --> 00:14:25,412 I'm in the neighborhood. I'll drop in. 254 00:14:26,459 --> 00:14:29,342 No, just tell him not to slaughter. 255 00:14:29,471 --> 00:14:32,084 No slaughter. Don't kill the goats. 256 00:14:32,250 --> 00:14:34,144 ♪ Tu vuo' fa' ll'americano ♪ 257 00:14:34,231 --> 00:14:36,496 ♪ Mericano, mericano ♪ 258 00:14:37,354 --> 00:14:40,104 ♪ Sient'a mme chi t' 'o ffa fa' ♪ 259 00:14:40,284 --> 00:14:44,861 ♪ Tu vuoi vivere alla moda Ma se bevi whisky and soda ♪ 260 00:14:45,419 --> 00:14:46,887 ♪ Po' te siente 'e disturba' ♪ 261 00:14:47,215 --> 00:14:50,178 [GOATS BLEATING] 262 00:14:50,341 --> 00:14:52,129 Mr. Milo. 263 00:14:52,409 --> 00:14:54,329 It's so wonderful to have you back. 264 00:14:54,354 --> 00:14:56,733 Ciao Alessandro, che piacere vederti. 265 00:14:56,780 --> 00:14:57,780 ALESSANDRO: [GRUNTS] 266 00:14:57,892 --> 00:15:00,017 Alessandro, I want you to meet two very, 267 00:15:00,042 --> 00:15:02,378 very good friends of mine. This is John Yossarian. 268 00:15:02,403 --> 00:15:03,406 - Hiya. - ALESSANDRO: Hi. 269 00:15:03,431 --> 00:15:04,447 And Ivor Orr. 270 00:15:04,653 --> 00:15:07,907 My friends. My friends. 271 00:15:08,092 --> 00:15:09,468 [LAUGHS] 272 00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:11,650 Alessandro, we had an agreement. 273 00:15:12,256 --> 00:15:14,047 Yes, yes. 274 00:15:14,767 --> 00:15:16,751 But you said some goats. 275 00:15:17,813 --> 00:15:19,816 You didn't say 500 goats. 276 00:15:19,864 --> 00:15:21,783 500 goats is good, no? 277 00:15:21,784 --> 00:15:22,931 You can milk them. 278 00:15:23,083 --> 00:15:25,921 No, no, Mr. Milo. We cannot feed them. 279 00:15:26,032 --> 00:15:27,408 MILO: Don't they just eat grass? 280 00:15:27,503 --> 00:15:28,923 Let them eat the grass. 281 00:15:28,924 --> 00:15:31,486 Oh, you don't understand goats. [LAUGHS] 282 00:15:32,263 --> 00:15:35,400 ALESSANDRO: The grass is already gone. And now they eat everything. 283 00:15:35,669 --> 00:15:38,001 They eat things that are not even food. 284 00:15:38,392 --> 00:15:40,738 Let me assure you, we are so thankful 285 00:15:40,739 --> 00:15:42,784 for everything you have done for us. 286 00:15:42,785 --> 00:15:45,580 And this town has most surely been blessed 287 00:15:45,581 --> 00:15:46,876 by your generosity. 288 00:15:46,901 --> 00:15:47,901 Very welcome. 289 00:15:48,823 --> 00:15:53,853 But 500 goats, it's just too many goats. 290 00:15:54,613 --> 00:15:57,190 [GOATS BLEATING] 291 00:16:00,096 --> 00:16:01,738 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 292 00:16:01,739 --> 00:16:03,408 MILO: It's amazing the demand you can create 293 00:16:03,409 --> 00:16:04,885 just by moving things around. 294 00:16:05,112 --> 00:16:06,746 That's what I do with the eggs. 295 00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:09,545 Now... now, I don't understand what you do with the eggs. 296 00:16:09,546 --> 00:16:11,967 You buy them for seven cents apiece in Malta 297 00:16:11,968 --> 00:16:13,511 then you sell them for five cents? 298 00:16:13,512 --> 00:16:15,390 I do it to make a profit. 299 00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:17,185 Well, why do people come to Malta for eggs 300 00:16:17,186 --> 00:16:18,321 when they're so expensive, there? 301 00:16:18,346 --> 00:16:19,973 Because they've always done it that way. 302 00:16:19,998 --> 00:16:22,130 Why don't they go look for eggs in Sicily? 303 00:16:22,155 --> 00:16:24,241 Because they've never done it that way. 304 00:16:24,242 --> 00:16:26,078 Now I really don't understand. 305 00:16:26,079 --> 00:16:27,915 Why... why don't you sell your mess hall's eggs 306 00:16:27,916 --> 00:16:30,211 for seven cents apiece instead of five cents apiece? 307 00:16:30,212 --> 00:16:32,507 Because my mess halls would have no need for me then. 308 00:16:32,508 --> 00:16:35,649 Anyone can buy seven cents apiece eggs for seven cents apiece. 309 00:16:35,674 --> 00:16:38,900 And at least this way I can make a bid for myself as a middle man. 310 00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,412 What? So you do make a profit. 311 00:16:40,437 --> 00:16:42,654 Ah, the syndicate benefits when I benefit 312 00:16:42,679 --> 00:16:44,347 because everybody has a share. 313 00:16:44,407 --> 00:16:46,459 You'll see when we get to Palermo. 314 00:16:46,889 --> 00:16:48,381 I thought you said we were going to Malta. 315 00:16:48,406 --> 00:16:50,332 - Ah, Palermo first. - [KNOCKING] 316 00:16:50,793 --> 00:16:52,012 You hear that, Orr? 317 00:16:52,037 --> 00:16:53,581 ♪ ♪ 318 00:16:53,843 --> 00:16:55,846 ♪ Tu vuo' fa' ll'americano ♪ 319 00:16:55,847 --> 00:16:58,545 ♪ Mericano, mericano ♪ 320 00:16:58,978 --> 00:17:00,626 ♪ Sient'a mme chi t' 'o ffa fa' ♪ 321 00:17:01,775 --> 00:17:03,528 ♪ Tu vuoi vivere alla moda ♪ 322 00:17:03,720 --> 00:17:04,823 Come on, fellas. Let's go, guys. 323 00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:06,423 ♪ Whisky and soda ♪ 324 00:17:06,994 --> 00:17:08,664 ♪ Po' te siente 'e disturba' ♪ 325 00:17:08,665 --> 00:17:09,790 [GOATS BLEATING] 326 00:17:09,815 --> 00:17:11,985 ♪ Tu abball' o' rocchenroll ♪ 327 00:17:12,392 --> 00:17:14,923 ♪ Tu giochi a baisiboll ♪ 328 00:17:14,948 --> 00:17:17,306 ♪ Ma e solde p' e' Ccamel ♪ 329 00:17:17,331 --> 00:17:19,918 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 330 00:17:19,943 --> 00:17:20,907 ♪ ♪ 331 00:17:20,932 --> 00:17:24,480 ♪ Mericano, mericano ♪ 332 00:17:25,489 --> 00:17:27,158 ♪ Ma si' nato in Italy ♪ 333 00:17:27,579 --> 00:17:30,206 ♪ Sient' a mme, nun ce sta niente 'a fa' ♪ 334 00:17:30,207 --> 00:17:32,252 ♪ Ok, napulitan ♪ 335 00:17:32,253 --> 00:17:33,463 ♪ Tu vuo' fa' ll'american ♪ 336 00:17:33,464 --> 00:17:34,883 ♪ Tu vuo' fa' ll'american ♪ 337 00:17:34,884 --> 00:17:37,470 ♪ ♪ 338 00:17:40,510 --> 00:17:41,884 What's sindaco? 339 00:17:42,306 --> 00:17:44,461 Sindaco. It means mayor. 340 00:17:44,486 --> 00:17:45,954 I'm the mayor of Palermo. 341 00:17:46,257 --> 00:17:47,257 YOSSARIAN: How? 342 00:17:47,862 --> 00:17:49,837 'Cause I brought Scotch to Italy. 343 00:17:50,767 --> 00:17:53,087 Well, since when do the Italians drink Scotch? 344 00:17:53,112 --> 00:17:55,566 They don't. Scotch is very expensive. 345 00:17:55,591 --> 00:17:57,665 These people are very poor. 346 00:17:58,459 --> 00:18:00,671 Well, why are you importing it if nobody drinks it? 347 00:18:00,696 --> 00:18:02,009 To inflate the price. 348 00:18:02,227 --> 00:18:04,483 MILO: Sicily's now the third largest exporter 349 00:18:04,484 --> 00:18:05,778 of Scotch in the world. 350 00:18:06,024 --> 00:18:07,735 That's why they elected me mayor. 351 00:18:08,575 --> 00:18:10,036 That's why they elected him mayor. 352 00:18:10,037 --> 00:18:11,790 ORR: Good for you, Milo. 353 00:18:11,791 --> 00:18:14,796 [BRASS BAND PLAYING] 354 00:18:14,797 --> 00:18:17,259 ♪ ♪ 355 00:18:17,260 --> 00:18:19,848 Oh, bello, bello. Perfetto! 356 00:18:19,849 --> 00:18:21,416 ♪ ♪ 357 00:18:21,441 --> 00:18:22,441 Grazie. 358 00:18:22,466 --> 00:18:25,472 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 359 00:18:35,045 --> 00:18:38,142 Signor Minderbinder. Signor Minderbinder. 360 00:18:38,217 --> 00:18:39,419 Ah, Giuseppe. 361 00:18:39,779 --> 00:18:40,779 Telefono. 362 00:18:41,934 --> 00:18:44,363 This is M&M Enterprises. This is Milo Minderbinder. 363 00:18:44,364 --> 00:18:46,871 - Milo, ¿cómo estás? ¿Todo bien? - Uh-huh, Fernando. 364 00:18:46,896 --> 00:18:48,987 FERNANDO: Eh, mi hermano. Mira, tengo 200 cajas 365 00:18:49,012 --> 00:18:50,016 - de alcachofas. - Okay. 366 00:18:50,017 --> 00:18:51,860 FERNANDO: Si las quiere, pero ya tengo otro persona que las 367 00:18:51,885 --> 00:18:52,995 - quiere comprar. - Yeah, we should. 368 00:18:53,020 --> 00:18:54,574 FERNANDO: Así que si no me lo puedes decir ahora... 369 00:18:54,599 --> 00:18:55,702 We should absolutely do that. 370 00:18:55,727 --> 00:18:57,148 FERNANDO: ... tengo que vendérselo a otra persona, no puedo dejar... 371 00:18:57,173 --> 00:19:00,069 Okay, all right. Give me, uh, four hours. 372 00:19:00,174 --> 00:19:01,318 FERNANDO: Cuatro horas. ¿Seguro? 373 00:19:01,352 --> 00:19:04,124 Yeah, send my love to Marge and the kids, okay? 374 00:19:04,183 --> 00:19:05,210 FERNANDO: Está bien, se lo digo. 375 00:19:05,591 --> 00:19:08,801 Artichokes. Insane prices. I have to act fast. 376 00:19:09,413 --> 00:19:10,413 [GRUNTS] 377 00:19:12,413 --> 00:19:14,090 I'll be back. Don't wait up for me. 378 00:19:20,944 --> 00:19:23,950 [PLANE ENGINES APPROACHING] 379 00:19:30,881 --> 00:19:32,395 YOSSARIAN: About fucking time. 380 00:19:55,177 --> 00:19:58,349 MILO: Hi, fellas! I'm so sorry! 381 00:19:58,420 --> 00:20:00,423 I had to meet the artichoke king. 382 00:20:00,424 --> 00:20:02,510 He's in Gibraltar. It's quite the hike. 383 00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:05,198 Oh, we slept on goddamn deck chairs. 384 00:20:05,331 --> 00:20:07,878 I can organize a massage in Malta. 385 00:20:08,106 --> 00:20:10,026 Milo, what am I doing here? 386 00:20:10,027 --> 00:20:11,905 We gotta chop-chop now, boys! 387 00:20:12,163 --> 00:20:14,911 [GLEN MILLER'S "BEGIN THE BEGUINE"] 388 00:20:14,912 --> 00:20:19,148 ♪ ♪ 389 00:20:25,384 --> 00:20:27,562 Ladies and gentlemen, thank you. 390 00:20:27,843 --> 00:20:30,525 And, uh, we, um, welcome tonight 391 00:20:30,773 --> 00:20:35,023 a very special guest. A very special friend. 392 00:20:35,327 --> 00:20:39,042 And the first American in over 120 years 393 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:43,490 to ever hold the title of Assistant Governor General of Malta. 394 00:20:43,934 --> 00:20:46,022 Ladies and gentlemen, I give you 395 00:20:46,344 --> 00:20:49,319 Major Sir Milo Minderbinder. 396 00:20:49,694 --> 00:20:52,778 [APPLAUSE] 397 00:20:52,779 --> 00:20:53,842 Hear! 398 00:20:54,638 --> 00:20:56,302 Thank you, Governor General. 399 00:20:56,327 --> 00:20:59,076 And ladies and gentlemen, it is an absolute honor to be here tonight. 400 00:20:59,250 --> 00:21:02,255 [APPLAUSE] 401 00:21:02,256 --> 00:21:04,342 ♪ ♪ 402 00:21:04,343 --> 00:21:06,662 MILO: These are a gift for the Caliph of Oran. 403 00:21:06,982 --> 00:21:08,318 YOSSARIAN: What is Oran? 404 00:21:08,545 --> 00:21:10,522 MILO: It's a city in Algeria. 405 00:21:10,666 --> 00:21:12,711 It was founded by the Moors in the 10th century. 406 00:21:12,736 --> 00:21:15,603 ORR: Why are you giving the Caliph of Oran a plane full of parrots? 407 00:21:15,926 --> 00:21:18,305 MILO: Because it's customary for the Pasha of Oran 408 00:21:18,330 --> 00:21:19,821 to give gifts to the Caliph. 409 00:21:20,415 --> 00:21:22,086 YOSSARIAN: And you're the Pasha of Oran? 410 00:21:22,087 --> 00:21:24,368 MILO: Oh, it's an honorary title. You know how these things go. 411 00:21:24,393 --> 00:21:25,954 It doesn't actually mean anything. 412 00:21:35,097 --> 00:21:37,095 MILO: Ah, they're beautiful, aren't they? 413 00:21:37,744 --> 00:21:39,056 YOSSARIAN: What are you doing with them? 414 00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:42,100 Well, Oran is where I call in my favor. 415 00:21:42,125 --> 00:21:43,961 Oran means one thing to me. 416 00:21:44,090 --> 00:21:45,842 And that thing is dates. 417 00:21:46,023 --> 00:21:47,692 Well, two things. 418 00:21:47,717 --> 00:21:49,584 I'm thinking of taking out some oil leases, too. 419 00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:51,506 But today it's all about dates. 420 00:21:51,531 --> 00:21:53,034 - What dates? - MILO: Date dates. 421 00:21:53,108 --> 00:21:55,696 The dates you eat. They're a palm fruit. 422 00:21:55,697 --> 00:21:57,992 Algerian dates are the best in the world, 423 00:21:58,017 --> 00:22:00,085 and this guy that we're going to see, the Caliph... 424 00:22:00,247 --> 00:22:03,638 he has a lot of them. And I mean a lot of them. 425 00:22:03,663 --> 00:22:04,663 Okay. 426 00:22:04,688 --> 00:22:07,782 Now, the thing with this guy is he's nervous. 427 00:22:07,889 --> 00:22:09,423 Maybe it's an Arab thing. 428 00:22:09,526 --> 00:22:11,529 Maybe he just wants a little show of respect. 429 00:22:11,554 --> 00:22:13,599 The Arabs are an ancient people. 430 00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:16,946 Ancient families doing business with other ancient families. 431 00:22:16,947 --> 00:22:18,365 Things move slow. 432 00:22:18,366 --> 00:22:21,490 I think the speed of American enterprise gives him the willies. 433 00:22:21,782 --> 00:22:24,353 And I'm guessing he just wants to know that he's getting 434 00:22:24,378 --> 00:22:26,298 into business with some serious people. 435 00:22:26,299 --> 00:22:28,529 So I told him I was bringing my friend with me today. 436 00:22:28,822 --> 00:22:31,803 My friend being a wealthy American industrialist. 437 00:22:31,846 --> 00:22:35,522 That wealthy American industrialist being you. 438 00:22:36,695 --> 00:22:38,389 [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC] 439 00:22:40,358 --> 00:22:46,715 ♪ ♪ 440 00:22:55,116 --> 00:22:57,990 MILO: Most high Caliph, it is so wonderful to see you again. 441 00:22:58,015 --> 00:22:59,934 CALIPH: And you, too, good Milo. 442 00:23:00,092 --> 00:23:03,287 You are always welcome in my house. 443 00:23:03,453 --> 00:23:04,881 You have journeyed well. 444 00:23:05,319 --> 00:23:08,319 - You look very good. - I feel radiant, Your Majesty. 445 00:23:08,344 --> 00:23:11,577 Perhaps it is the fragrant air of your magical country. 446 00:23:12,022 --> 00:23:13,756 Perhaps it is, good Milo. 447 00:23:14,281 --> 00:23:17,350 Perhaps you should find a way of bottling it 448 00:23:17,375 --> 00:23:19,139 to take home with you to America. 449 00:23:19,164 --> 00:23:21,898 Indeed we should. It would make my people very happy. 450 00:23:22,287 --> 00:23:23,593 Your Highness, if you will, 451 00:23:23,626 --> 00:23:25,616 allow me to introduce you to a dear, dear friend. 452 00:23:25,813 --> 00:23:27,835 Your Greatness, it's my pleasure to introduce 453 00:23:27,860 --> 00:23:31,062 to you a fantastically wealthy American industrialist 454 00:23:31,087 --> 00:23:33,382 from an ancient American family. 455 00:23:33,793 --> 00:23:35,755 Mr. Nelson D. Rockefeller. 456 00:23:38,202 --> 00:23:42,709 Mr. Rockefeller, it is such a great honor. 457 00:23:43,529 --> 00:23:45,358 I have heard so much about you. 458 00:23:45,965 --> 00:23:48,561 And I you, great man. 459 00:23:49,873 --> 00:23:51,000 Ah... 460 00:23:53,437 --> 00:23:55,819 CALIPH: It is wonderful that you are here today. 461 00:23:56,197 --> 00:23:57,248 Come. 462 00:23:57,822 --> 00:23:59,283 MILO: Thank you, your greatness. 463 00:24:04,196 --> 00:24:07,326 CALIPH: This war is a terrible nuisance, is it not? 464 00:24:07,429 --> 00:24:09,561 MILO: Oh, terrible. Terrible nuisance. 465 00:24:09,691 --> 00:24:10,944 - YOSSARIAN: It's terrible. - ORR: Terrible. 466 00:24:11,812 --> 00:24:13,268 Mr. Rockefeller, 467 00:24:14,401 --> 00:24:18,362 your negotiations in the Mesopotamian Oil Agreement 468 00:24:18,387 --> 00:24:22,682 of 1938, I was most impressed. 469 00:24:23,172 --> 00:24:25,635 - You're very tough. - Yes, I am, Your Highness. 470 00:24:26,185 --> 00:24:27,185 But fair. 471 00:24:28,190 --> 00:24:31,776 The Sultan of Assur is a difficult man. 472 00:24:32,519 --> 00:24:35,237 Your powers of persuasion must be formidable. 473 00:24:35,483 --> 00:24:39,709 He was a tricky customer, but we got there eventually. 474 00:24:39,930 --> 00:24:42,820 I think you'll find the Caliph to be not nearly so difficult. 475 00:24:42,931 --> 00:24:45,367 But I am a skilled negotiator. 476 00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:49,501 - I must warn you. - As am I, Your Grace. As am I. 477 00:24:50,761 --> 00:24:53,098 CALIPH: Well, then, and what do you think 478 00:24:53,123 --> 00:24:56,017 the prospects of exploration in my country might be? 479 00:24:57,527 --> 00:24:59,360 Good. Mm-hmm. 480 00:24:59,492 --> 00:25:00,813 I think they'd be very good. 481 00:25:01,180 --> 00:25:03,743 The Saharan Desert presents its problems. 482 00:25:04,229 --> 00:25:07,712 Oh, Sahara. God forbid, so hot. 483 00:25:08,007 --> 00:25:10,798 My concern would be not so much the heat 484 00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:16,412 as the possibility of igneous layers over the shale deposits. 485 00:25:16,701 --> 00:25:18,826 They're a problem, those igneous layers. 486 00:25:19,754 --> 00:25:21,005 And how would you approach that? 487 00:25:21,623 --> 00:25:22,623 [INHALES] 488 00:25:22,750 --> 00:25:23,918 Technology. 489 00:25:24,325 --> 00:25:25,935 And what technology? 490 00:25:26,696 --> 00:25:28,076 The latest technology. 491 00:25:28,187 --> 00:25:31,294 CALIPH: And what, pray tell, is the latest technology? 492 00:25:31,531 --> 00:25:34,154 I don't know, Your Honor. I'm a businessman. 493 00:25:34,179 --> 00:25:35,755 I'm not an engineer. [LAUGHS] 494 00:25:36,076 --> 00:25:37,843 CALIPH: You're an oil man, aren't you? 495 00:25:38,110 --> 00:25:41,218 Surely you know how your oil is extracted. 496 00:25:41,607 --> 00:25:43,952 I don't... I don't really... 497 00:25:43,977 --> 00:25:46,864 Our most recent experiences with the igneous rock 498 00:25:46,889 --> 00:25:49,142 were more than adequately handled with the new 499 00:25:49,167 --> 00:25:51,922 diaphragm-operated bypass valve drill bit. 500 00:25:52,220 --> 00:25:54,692 The regular drill bits have a baffle 501 00:25:54,717 --> 00:25:56,218 in the air-mixing chamber. 502 00:25:56,243 --> 00:25:58,732 But the new ones have a self-sealing CCU 503 00:25:58,757 --> 00:26:00,935 strapped onto the electric centrifuge pump. 504 00:26:01,220 --> 00:26:04,016 [RELAXING MUSIC PLAYING] 505 00:26:04,041 --> 00:26:05,752 ♪ ♪ 506 00:26:05,777 --> 00:26:07,333 My geologist. Kid's a genius. 507 00:26:15,242 --> 00:26:18,763 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 508 00:26:23,285 --> 00:26:26,232 MILO: I'm happy for you. You flew your missions. 509 00:26:26,257 --> 00:26:27,513 You did your part. 510 00:26:28,672 --> 00:26:30,224 When do you get to go home? 511 00:26:30,590 --> 00:26:32,184 I'm not really gonna get to go home 512 00:26:32,217 --> 00:26:33,575 until this thing's done and dusted. 513 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:35,408 I mean, I'm not gonna go home the normal way. 514 00:26:35,466 --> 00:26:36,622 The normal way? 515 00:26:36,877 --> 00:26:39,013 MILO: Well, I'm never gonna catch up to my mission quota. 516 00:26:39,038 --> 00:26:40,114 Not at this rate. 517 00:26:40,514 --> 00:26:41,766 You have a mission quota? 518 00:26:41,837 --> 00:26:43,513 Yeah, we all do, don't we? 519 00:26:44,168 --> 00:26:46,325 - Where's it at now? - 50. 520 00:26:46,414 --> 00:26:47,750 How many have you flown? 521 00:26:47,915 --> 00:26:50,739 Six, five. Five or six. 522 00:26:51,234 --> 00:26:52,234 Wow. 523 00:26:53,856 --> 00:26:55,341 When this is all over, 524 00:26:55,888 --> 00:26:57,742 we should go into business together. 525 00:26:57,876 --> 00:26:59,870 - Well, back home? - Yeah, sure. 526 00:26:59,911 --> 00:27:01,496 Back home, everywhere. 527 00:27:01,521 --> 00:27:04,359 - And do what? - Buy things, sell things. 528 00:27:04,384 --> 00:27:07,563 What, sell amphibious vehicles to the fishermen of Minnesota? 529 00:27:07,588 --> 00:27:09,782 Sell everything to everyone. 530 00:27:11,119 --> 00:27:13,039 ♪ Tu vuo' fa' ll'americano ♪ 531 00:27:13,064 --> 00:27:15,392 ♪ Mericano, mericano ♪ 532 00:27:16,299 --> 00:27:19,054 ♪ Sient'a mme chi t' 'o ffa fa' ♪ 533 00:27:19,102 --> 00:27:23,681 ♪ Tu vuoi vivere alla moda Ma se bevi whisky and soda ♪ 534 00:27:24,196 --> 00:27:27,075 ♪ Po' te siente 'e disturba' Tu vuo' fa' ll'american ♪ 535 00:27:27,076 --> 00:27:28,368 ♪ Tu vuo' fa' ll'american ♪ 536 00:27:28,725 --> 00:27:33,532 ♪ Whisky and soda e rocchenroll Whisky and soda e rocchenroll ♪ 537 00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:36,126 ♪ Whisky and soda e rocchenroll ♪ 538 00:27:36,386 --> 00:27:39,434 [RENATO CAROSONE'S "TU VUO' FA' L'AMERICANO"] 539 00:27:51,897 --> 00:27:53,126 YOSSARIAN: Colonel Korn, sir. 540 00:27:54,005 --> 00:27:55,243 KORN: What can I do for you? 541 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,192 YOSSARIAN: I was just checking in, sir, 542 00:27:57,217 --> 00:27:58,822 about my, uh... my discharge papers. 543 00:27:59,033 --> 00:28:01,328 Ah, yes. It was, uh... 544 00:28:01,353 --> 00:28:03,641 It was almost the next thing I was getting to. 545 00:28:03,666 --> 00:28:05,938 - Oh, that's great, sir. - This was... 546 00:28:06,154 --> 00:28:08,916 Remind me, you were... you were at 50 missions, huh? 547 00:28:08,941 --> 00:28:10,005 Correct, sir. 548 00:28:10,247 --> 00:28:11,247 Oh. 549 00:28:11,929 --> 00:28:14,685 Oh, that could be a problem. Hmm. 550 00:28:15,496 --> 00:28:16,966 Why would that be a problem, sir? 551 00:28:17,089 --> 00:28:18,943 Well, the missions were raised last night. 552 00:28:18,968 --> 00:28:20,095 Didn't you hear? 553 00:28:22,187 --> 00:28:23,187 No. 554 00:28:23,642 --> 00:28:25,425 Uh, sir, I was in Algeria, sir. 555 00:28:25,450 --> 00:28:27,403 But... but this was already... these were already put... 556 00:28:27,428 --> 00:28:29,306 Yeah, but the paperwork hasn't been processed yet, 557 00:28:29,331 --> 00:28:31,627 as apparently is the case in this instance. 558 00:28:31,782 --> 00:28:32,957 My apologies. 559 00:28:33,130 --> 00:28:35,676 And technically speaking, you haven't been discharged. 560 00:28:36,131 --> 00:28:37,723 And if you haven't been discharged, 561 00:28:37,748 --> 00:28:40,465 then technically speaking, you're still on active duty. 562 00:28:40,849 --> 00:28:42,543 And if you're still on active duty, 563 00:28:42,568 --> 00:28:46,114 then technically speaking, you still have to fly 564 00:28:46,139 --> 00:28:48,059 the number of missions required of you 565 00:28:48,084 --> 00:28:49,795 before you can be discharged. 566 00:28:49,973 --> 00:28:53,762 And as of yesterday, that number is 55, my friend. 567 00:28:53,787 --> 00:28:55,153 But I did everything right. 568 00:28:55,746 --> 00:28:57,567 KORN: It's been such a busy week. 569 00:28:57,888 --> 00:29:01,575 That really is terrible timing. And, you know what? I sympathize. 570 00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:02,755 I do. But you know what? 571 00:29:03,318 --> 00:29:05,169 Think about it this way, right? 572 00:29:05,925 --> 00:29:07,598 Only five more to go. 573 00:29:07,820 --> 00:29:10,551 [LAUGHS] Yeah. 574 00:29:18,934 --> 00:29:21,739 DUCKETT: What is it you're pretending is wrong this time? Hmm? 575 00:29:21,936 --> 00:29:24,544 I don't know. Uh, nothing. 576 00:29:26,771 --> 00:29:29,013 Well, did you manage to secretly fly all those missions? 577 00:29:29,534 --> 00:29:31,161 Yeah, actually, I did. 578 00:29:31,771 --> 00:29:32,935 And then they raised them again. 579 00:29:34,054 --> 00:29:37,091 [DUCKETT CHUCKLES] 580 00:29:37,594 --> 00:29:40,630 Well, you knew they would. 581 00:29:43,515 --> 00:29:45,130 You expend a lot of energy, don't you? 582 00:29:45,574 --> 00:29:46,574 Apparently so. 583 00:29:47,062 --> 00:29:49,859 Seems to me that you expend a lot of energy 584 00:29:49,884 --> 00:29:52,075 railing against things that you can't control. 585 00:29:52,398 --> 00:29:54,130 And who says I can't control 'em? 586 00:29:55,735 --> 00:29:56,958 This is war. 587 00:29:58,102 --> 00:30:01,357 It's a law of nature that war concentrates power in the hands 588 00:30:01,382 --> 00:30:03,185 of those most likely to abuse it. 589 00:30:03,606 --> 00:30:05,708 Can't overcome that power while the war's still on. 590 00:30:06,021 --> 00:30:07,314 You just gotta hope for it to end. 591 00:30:07,729 --> 00:30:08,903 Oh, it's gonna end. 592 00:30:09,773 --> 00:30:11,708 I just still wanna be alive when it does. 593 00:30:14,295 --> 00:30:18,724 Or, maybe rather than simply hoping for it to end, 594 00:30:20,062 --> 00:30:21,974 you could just fly your missions. 595 00:30:23,185 --> 00:30:24,772 Do whatever you can to end it yourself. 596 00:30:27,423 --> 00:30:28,591 Maybe. 597 00:30:30,191 --> 00:30:31,896 Or maybe you can mind your own business. 598 00:30:33,752 --> 00:30:35,701 [LAUGHS] 599 00:30:38,618 --> 00:30:40,079 [CHUCKLES] 600 00:30:47,216 --> 00:30:50,222 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 601 00:30:50,486 --> 00:30:51,486 Yo-Yo. 602 00:30:52,970 --> 00:30:55,139 - I wanted to ask you something. - Oh, yeah? 603 00:30:55,296 --> 00:30:56,296 What's that? 604 00:30:57,032 --> 00:30:58,704 I'm gonna ask Clara to marry me. 605 00:30:59,701 --> 00:31:01,287 - Nately... - Well, what do you think? 606 00:31:02,357 --> 00:31:05,349 I think you're 24 years old, and she's a prostitute. 607 00:31:05,907 --> 00:31:07,993 Yeah, so? I love her. 608 00:31:08,018 --> 00:31:09,146 Doesn't that mean something? 609 00:31:09,458 --> 00:31:11,099 It means you're not thinking straight. 610 00:31:11,790 --> 00:31:13,239 I've never felt clearer. 611 00:31:14,499 --> 00:31:16,349 So you're gonna marry an Italian whore, 612 00:31:16,956 --> 00:31:18,490 you're gonna make a straight woman of her, 613 00:31:18,515 --> 00:31:19,998 and you're gonna drag her home to Connecticut? 614 00:31:20,794 --> 00:31:21,794 Connecticut? 615 00:31:22,184 --> 00:31:23,935 What the hell is the matter with you? 616 00:31:24,287 --> 00:31:26,896 No, this is all amazing. Here. 617 00:31:27,074 --> 00:31:29,193 The life is amazing. Sex is amazing. 618 00:31:29,289 --> 00:31:31,779 Italy is the greatest. We're gonna win the war. 619 00:31:31,961 --> 00:31:34,060 And then I'm gonna use the GI Bill to stay here, 620 00:31:34,085 --> 00:31:35,935 marry Clara, and open a restaurant. 621 00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:37,545 You know how this works, don't you? 622 00:31:37,753 --> 00:31:40,216 You pay her money, and she doesn't love you. 623 00:31:43,493 --> 00:31:46,115 Well, you weren't there. What would you know? 624 00:31:46,533 --> 00:31:48,130 YOSSARIAN: Nothing. Nothing. 625 00:31:48,247 --> 00:31:49,396 NATELY: Oh, fuck, buddy. 626 00:31:49,586 --> 00:31:51,756 You know, I was gonna ask you to be my best man and all. 627 00:31:51,781 --> 00:31:52,881 Look at this thing. 628 00:31:55,867 --> 00:31:57,765 You're 24. She's a prostitute. 629 00:31:57,790 --> 00:31:59,296 But she's a prostitute now. 630 00:31:59,321 --> 00:32:01,116 She won't be once I've married her. 631 00:32:02,773 --> 00:32:05,278 Dang, buddy, I am telling you something big here. 632 00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:12,240 You're right. 633 00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:14,804 This is great. 634 00:32:15,435 --> 00:32:16,679 I'll be your best man. 635 00:32:16,855 --> 00:32:17,874 I'm sorry. 636 00:32:18,027 --> 00:32:19,028 I'm very happy for you. 637 00:32:23,396 --> 00:32:24,690 Thank you. 638 00:32:29,281 --> 00:32:32,287 [BOOMING] 639 00:32:39,700 --> 00:32:41,052 NEW MCWATT: How are we looking? 640 00:32:41,077 --> 00:32:42,747 - AARFY: Holding. - NEW KID SAMPSON: Copy that. 641 00:32:42,772 --> 00:32:44,014 NEW MCWATT: That's what you said a minute ago. 642 00:32:44,039 --> 00:32:45,709 AARFY: Nothing's changed. We're holding. 643 00:32:45,734 --> 00:32:46,985 Hey, that's the river, though, right? 644 00:32:47,010 --> 00:32:48,386 Yeah, that's the river. 645 00:32:48,428 --> 00:32:49,570 YOSSARIAN: So, is that the bridge? 646 00:32:49,602 --> 00:32:50,974 No, different bridge. 647 00:32:51,162 --> 00:32:53,120 Well, how do you know we're talking about the same bridge? 648 00:32:53,145 --> 00:32:54,939 I'm talking about that bridge. 649 00:32:54,940 --> 00:32:56,316 AARFY: I don't know what bridge you're talking about, 650 00:32:56,317 --> 00:32:57,687 but it's not the bridge I mean. 651 00:32:57,712 --> 00:32:59,005 YOSSARIAN: But this is the river, right? 652 00:32:59,030 --> 00:33:00,300 I can't see any other bridges. 653 00:33:00,325 --> 00:33:02,707 - 'Cause we're not there yet. - YOSSARIAN: How far are we, goddamn it? 654 00:33:02,732 --> 00:33:03,858 - Close. - YOSSARIAN: What? 655 00:33:03,883 --> 00:33:04,926 I said we're close. 656 00:33:04,951 --> 00:33:07,159 Close to what? The river or the bridge? 657 00:33:07,184 --> 00:33:08,746 I'm seeing the river down there. 658 00:33:08,771 --> 00:33:10,857 Come on, guys. Keep it together up there. 659 00:33:10,882 --> 00:33:12,258 Come again, Bouncin' Betty, over. 660 00:33:12,283 --> 00:33:14,703 I'm seeing the river down there. 661 00:33:14,728 --> 00:33:16,189 He ain't talking to you, Yo-Yo. 662 00:33:16,232 --> 00:33:19,196 7344, approaching target, over. 663 00:33:19,197 --> 00:33:21,220 YOSSARIAN: What's going on? Bouncin' Betty, do you read me? 664 00:33:21,245 --> 00:33:23,540 This is 7344 approaching target. 665 00:33:23,565 --> 00:33:25,179 What's going on with Bouncin' Betty? 666 00:33:25,204 --> 00:33:27,110 NEW MCWATT: Bouncin' Betty's been hit! She's going down! 667 00:33:27,135 --> 00:33:28,813 Bouncin' Betty, that's Orr's plane, isn't it? 668 00:33:28,838 --> 00:33:31,189 Hey... hey, Aarfy, Bouncin' Betty is Orr's plane. 669 00:33:31,214 --> 00:33:32,846 Yossarian, are you on a steady heading? 670 00:33:32,871 --> 00:33:35,237 - We're approaching. - Yes, I'm on a steady heading. 671 00:33:35,557 --> 00:33:36,761 Um, is that the bridge? 672 00:33:36,786 --> 00:33:38,253 What's... what's Orr saying? 673 00:33:38,278 --> 00:33:40,239 - NEW MCWATT: Who's Orr? - The Bouncin' Betty pilot. 674 00:33:40,272 --> 00:33:43,043 He says both engines are out. He's taking it over the water. 675 00:33:43,068 --> 00:33:45,092 AARFY: Yossarian, what's your drift angle? 676 00:33:45,117 --> 00:33:46,117 Uh... 677 00:33:46,853 --> 00:33:48,146 Uh, 12 degrees. 678 00:33:48,171 --> 00:33:50,522 - You gonna correct that? - Yes, I'm gonna correct that. 679 00:33:50,547 --> 00:33:52,476 - Affirmative. - NEW MCWATT: That's affirmative. 680 00:33:53,032 --> 00:33:54,117 What's affirmative? 681 00:33:54,142 --> 00:33:56,868 - He ain't talking to you, Yo-Yo! - I was talking to Bouncin' Betty. 682 00:33:56,893 --> 00:33:57,970 They're gonna ditch. 683 00:33:58,005 --> 00:33:59,094 Shit. 684 00:34:00,445 --> 00:34:02,718 AARFY: Yossarian, that's the bridge. Are you releasing? 685 00:34:03,249 --> 00:34:04,687 What? That's the bridge? 686 00:34:04,712 --> 00:34:07,038 AARFY: Yeah, that's the bridge. That's the fucking bridge. 687 00:34:07,531 --> 00:34:08,531 Fuck! 688 00:34:08,556 --> 00:34:10,373 - NEW KID SAMPSON: What happened? - He didn't drop the bombs. 689 00:34:11,178 --> 00:34:12,959 He didn't drop the fucking bombs. 690 00:34:13,746 --> 00:34:15,881 Yankee Doodle, did you miss your target and drop? 691 00:34:15,906 --> 00:34:18,331 PILOT: Yes, yes, drop. God damn it. 692 00:34:18,356 --> 00:34:20,090 - MAN: God, son of a bitch. - PILOT: God damn it. 693 00:34:20,115 --> 00:34:23,121 [BOOMING] 694 00:34:32,273 --> 00:34:33,512 Hey, did they hit the bridge? 695 00:34:33,537 --> 00:34:34,746 AARFY: Let's take a look. 696 00:34:36,256 --> 00:34:39,262 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 697 00:34:44,429 --> 00:34:46,304 AARFY: They were following your lead, Yossarian. 698 00:34:46,329 --> 00:34:47,330 They released too late. 699 00:34:47,370 --> 00:34:48,370 Shit. 700 00:34:48,483 --> 00:34:50,710 AARFY: Stunning work, Yossarian. Stunning work. 701 00:34:50,735 --> 00:34:52,819 Cathcart'll have us straight back up here tomorrow. 702 00:34:53,176 --> 00:34:56,182 [PLANE ENGINES ROARING] 703 00:34:57,544 --> 00:34:58,544 Fuck. 704 00:34:59,386 --> 00:35:01,186 - Turn us around. - AARFY: What? 705 00:35:01,211 --> 00:35:02,967 YOSSARIAN: Turn us around. We're going back. 706 00:35:02,992 --> 00:35:05,242 - Oh, you gotta be kidding me, guys! - Back where? 707 00:35:05,268 --> 00:35:06,386 YOSSARIAN: Back to the target. 708 00:35:06,411 --> 00:35:07,537 But what for? 709 00:35:07,538 --> 00:35:08,539 YOSSARIAN: To drop the bombs. 710 00:35:08,540 --> 00:35:09,598 Are you serious? 711 00:35:09,623 --> 00:35:11,584 Look, I didn't release, and they all missed. 712 00:35:12,056 --> 00:35:13,292 I'm really sorry, fellas. 713 00:35:13,326 --> 00:35:15,324 Let's just blow the Christ out of this fucking bridge 714 00:35:15,349 --> 00:35:17,227 - and go home. - Why don't we just go home? 715 00:35:17,252 --> 00:35:19,653 Because I'm not coming back up here tomorrow, all right? 716 00:35:20,749 --> 00:35:21,939 Motherfucker. 717 00:35:22,507 --> 00:35:25,513 [PLANE ENGINES RUMBLING] 718 00:35:26,842 --> 00:35:30,569 This is Yankee Doodle. We are, uh... we're turning back to target 719 00:35:30,594 --> 00:35:32,592 and we'll catch up with you. 720 00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:34,381 MAN: Roger that, Yankee Doodle. 721 00:35:34,461 --> 00:35:35,608 Fly safe. 722 00:35:35,633 --> 00:35:38,639 [PLANE ENGINES RUMBLING] 723 00:35:48,435 --> 00:35:51,441 [BOOMING] 724 00:35:51,466 --> 00:35:54,471 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 725 00:35:55,467 --> 00:35:56,467 Christ. 726 00:35:56,846 --> 00:36:01,498 ♪ ♪ 727 00:36:01,523 --> 00:36:02,639 God damn it. 728 00:36:02,664 --> 00:36:04,639 AARFY: All right, holding at 4200. 729 00:36:04,664 --> 00:36:07,389 Yossarian approaching quickly. You got that? 730 00:36:07,414 --> 00:36:08,459 YOSSARIAN: I got it. 731 00:36:08,484 --> 00:36:10,612 [CANNONS BOOMING] 732 00:36:10,637 --> 00:36:11,637 All right. 733 00:36:11,662 --> 00:36:14,124 AARFY: Holding steady, 266. 734 00:36:14,149 --> 00:36:16,904 Okay, holding steady. Holding course. 735 00:36:17,034 --> 00:36:18,118 Holy shit. 736 00:36:18,143 --> 00:36:19,748 AARFY: 30 seconds to target. 737 00:36:20,479 --> 00:36:21,479 YOSSARIAN: Holding. 738 00:36:23,053 --> 00:36:24,071 Hold. 739 00:36:24,693 --> 00:36:25,802 AARFY: Come on, Yo-Yo! 740 00:36:25,827 --> 00:36:28,280 Blast that bridge so we can get the fuck out of this shit! 741 00:36:28,305 --> 00:36:30,600 ♪ ♪ 742 00:36:30,625 --> 00:36:31,627 YOSSARIAN: Hold. 743 00:36:31,652 --> 00:36:33,739 ♪ ♪ 744 00:36:33,764 --> 00:36:34,905 Hold. 745 00:36:34,930 --> 00:36:36,473 ♪ ♪ 746 00:36:37,310 --> 00:36:38,592 Hold still, you fuck. 747 00:36:38,617 --> 00:36:41,622 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 748 00:36:41,647 --> 00:36:42,648 ♪ ♪ 749 00:36:42,673 --> 00:36:43,756 And... 750 00:36:43,781 --> 00:36:46,911 ♪ ♪ 751 00:36:46,936 --> 00:36:48,062 Release. 752 00:36:48,087 --> 00:36:51,719 [BOOMING] 753 00:36:51,931 --> 00:36:53,307 And we're off. 754 00:36:53,449 --> 00:36:54,951 All right, get us out of here. 755 00:36:54,976 --> 00:36:57,981 [BOOMING] 756 00:36:58,006 --> 00:37:02,709 ♪ ♪ 757 00:37:04,618 --> 00:37:07,694 [BOOMING] 758 00:37:11,787 --> 00:37:12,803 [NATELY SCREAMING] 759 00:37:12,828 --> 00:37:15,833 AARFY: Jesus Christ, what the fuck was that? 760 00:37:15,858 --> 00:37:18,112 - NATELY: Yo-Yo! - Nately! 761 00:37:18,137 --> 00:37:20,348 - [NATELY SCREAMS] - Nately, are you okay? 762 00:37:20,373 --> 00:37:22,522 NATELY: Yo-Yo! No! 763 00:37:22,775 --> 00:37:23,803 [NATELY SCREAMING] 764 00:37:23,828 --> 00:37:28,351 ♪ ♪ 765 00:37:30,684 --> 00:37:32,382 [YOSSARIAN GRUNTING] 766 00:37:33,236 --> 00:37:36,158 ♪ ♪ 767 00:37:37,432 --> 00:37:38,933 Oh, fuck. 768 00:37:39,309 --> 00:37:41,390 NATELY: Yo-Yo! Yo-Yo, throw me something! 769 00:37:41,582 --> 00:37:43,117 Oh! Nately! 770 00:37:44,673 --> 00:37:45,757 Hang on! 771 00:37:46,921 --> 00:37:47,968 Nately! 772 00:37:49,212 --> 00:37:50,445 Nately, hold on! 773 00:37:51,420 --> 00:37:53,609 Come on! Give me your hand! 774 00:37:53,634 --> 00:37:55,679 NATELY: Come on, I'm stuck! Yo-Yo, please! 775 00:37:55,704 --> 00:37:57,331 - Come on! - YOSSARIAN: God damn it! 776 00:37:57,356 --> 00:37:58,672 Yo-Yo, please! 777 00:37:59,148 --> 00:38:00,783 Hey, get me a rope! 778 00:38:00,808 --> 00:38:03,688 [RUMBLING] 779 00:38:03,713 --> 00:38:08,281 ♪ ♪ 780 00:38:13,396 --> 00:38:15,187 [GROANING] 781 00:38:16,708 --> 00:38:17,867 [SCREAMING] 782 00:38:17,892 --> 00:38:20,939 [WIND HOWLING] 783 00:38:27,487 --> 00:38:30,492 [WOMAN SINGING IN ITALIAN] 784 00:38:30,517 --> 00:38:34,438 ♪ ♪ 785 00:39:31,895 --> 00:39:35,295 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 57187

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