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(FILM REELING)
2
00:00:06,997 --> 00:00:10,497
(BOLD INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
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Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
4
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(DRAMATIC CLASSICAL MUSIC)
5
00:00:43,521 --> 00:00:45,521
(SIGHS)
6
00:00:50,201 --> 00:00:51,263
Got somethin' for ya'.
7
00:00:51,265 --> 00:00:52,512
Set in on the desk.
8
00:00:52,514 --> 00:00:55,388
I don't wanna catch your germs.
9
00:00:55,390 --> 00:00:57,612
At your service.
10
00:00:57,614 --> 00:00:59,643
A bit old for a bike messenger.
11
00:00:59,645 --> 00:01:01,012
I'm only 35.
12
00:01:01,014 --> 00:01:05,181
At 35, I was worth over
eight million dollars.
13
00:01:05,349 --> 00:01:07,466
I had seven large luxury buildings,
14
00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:09,519
and two massive boats.
15
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Messengering weren't my first choice.
16
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What were your first choice?
17
00:01:14,612 --> 00:01:16,001
Playin' ball.
18
00:01:16,003 --> 00:01:18,049
Let that be a lesson to you.
19
00:01:18,051 --> 00:01:20,493
You should've spent
less time shooting hoops
20
00:01:20,495 --> 00:01:22,076
and having your dick in the hole,
21
00:01:22,078 --> 00:01:24,478
and more time studying math.
22
00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:26,343
(SLAMMING)
23
00:01:26,345 --> 00:01:28,384
That'd be what my mother said,
24
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but she said it a little nicer.
25
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That's the problem with moms.
26
00:01:31,859 --> 00:01:33,726
They sugarcoat everything.
27
00:01:33,728 --> 00:01:37,645
Fathers, they lay out the
cold hard truth about life.
28
00:01:37,647 --> 00:01:39,748
Well, I ain't got a father.
29
00:01:39,750 --> 00:01:41,083
Lucky for you.
30
00:01:42,543 --> 00:01:44,210
Mine was an asshole.
31
00:01:47,591 --> 00:01:50,508
Envelope got more germs than pad.
32
00:01:53,653 --> 00:01:57,153
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
33
00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:01,869
Beware of the ides of March.
34
00:02:03,261 --> 00:02:05,011
It's a birthday card.
35
00:02:06,741 --> 00:02:09,575
They're gonna hold me a birthday party.
36
00:02:09,577 --> 00:02:12,327
I thought nobody knew or even cared.
37
00:02:12,329 --> 00:02:14,616
"The 40th anniversary
of the birth of the man
38
00:02:14,618 --> 00:02:16,535
"we most love to hate."
39
00:02:18,113 --> 00:02:18,946
Why?
40
00:02:19,928 --> 00:02:23,334
"We envy his success, power, and wealth."
41
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I knew it.
42
00:02:24,380 --> 00:02:27,297
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
43
00:02:48,122 --> 00:02:51,257
♫ It's the feeling you get when
everything is goin' your way
44
00:02:51,259 --> 00:02:52,825
♫ Smelling good lookin'
fresh I'm livin' it
45
00:02:52,827 --> 00:02:55,437
♫ To whistle for ladies to look my way
46
00:02:55,439 --> 00:02:59,358
♫ Something so phenomenal soon
as I walk through the doorway
47
00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:01,198
♫ Guess I got enough I'll
be there every second
48
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:03,195
♫ Every minute I could do this all day
49
00:03:03,197 --> 00:03:06,712
♫ Everything is movin'
flowin' singin' I got it
50
00:03:06,714 --> 00:03:08,686
♫ Feelin' like on top
of the world shoutin'
51
00:03:08,688 --> 00:03:10,878
♫ Sing I got it
♫ I got it
52
00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:12,212
♫ Sing it whoo
53
00:03:12,214 --> 00:03:14,564
♫ If you feel and know you got it
54
00:03:14,566 --> 00:03:16,528
♫ Let the whole world
know sing it out loud
55
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,157
♫ Say I got it
♫ I got it
56
00:03:19,159 --> 00:03:21,281
♫ Yeah on top of the world
57
00:03:21,283 --> 00:03:23,279
♫ On top of the world
58
00:03:23,281 --> 00:03:24,947
♫ On top of the world
59
00:03:24,949 --> 00:03:26,712
♫ It feels great if
you got it gotta get it
60
00:03:26,714 --> 00:03:29,034
♫ I'm ready let's go
♫ On top of the world
61
00:03:29,036 --> 00:03:32,733
♫ On top of the world
♫ On top of the world
62
00:03:32,735 --> 00:03:34,167
♫ It feels great if
you got it gotta get it
63
00:03:34,169 --> 00:03:35,308
♫ I'm ready let's go
64
00:03:35,310 --> 00:03:38,227
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
65
00:03:48,309 --> 00:03:50,563
♫ On top of the world
66
00:03:50,565 --> 00:03:52,317
♫ Yeah I'm on top top
67
00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:54,454
♫ See my life's been
good I won't flop flop
68
00:03:54,456 --> 00:03:56,394
♫ Yeah I'm movin' too
quick I can't stop stop
69
00:03:56,396 --> 00:03:58,431
♫ With my girls in the car drivin' drop
70
00:03:58,433 --> 00:04:01,019
(EERIE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
71
00:04:01,021 --> 00:04:03,188
(BARKING)
72
00:04:11,205 --> 00:04:12,961
(YELLING)
73
00:04:12,963 --> 00:04:16,700
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
74
00:04:16,702 --> 00:04:20,202
(BOLD INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
75
00:04:26,989 --> 00:04:30,906
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
76
00:04:32,831 --> 00:04:35,371
(BARKING)
77
00:04:35,373 --> 00:04:37,333
(YELLING)
78
00:04:37,335 --> 00:04:39,094
Yes, payday!
79
00:04:39,096 --> 00:04:42,014
(BARKING)
80
00:04:42,016 --> 00:04:43,415
"Your pay has been adjusted to reflect
81
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:46,493
"the occasions you were late."
82
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:47,929
Move it, Christine!
83
00:04:47,931 --> 00:04:51,147
My boss docks my pay if I'm
one second late, let's go.
84
00:04:51,149 --> 00:04:54,165
(BARKING)
Move it!
85
00:04:54,167 --> 00:04:58,250
(SUSPENSEFUL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
86
00:05:06,313 --> 00:05:08,230
I lost my shoe again.
87
00:05:10,624 --> 00:05:14,124
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
88
00:05:55,658 --> 00:05:57,825
You're late again, Mary.
89
00:06:01,828 --> 00:06:03,245
You too, Krystal!
90
00:06:12,288 --> 00:06:13,446
(KNOCKING)
91
00:06:13,448 --> 00:06:16,105
Yes, bank teller 0356.
92
00:06:16,107 --> 00:06:18,041
My condolences for your father, sir.
93
00:06:18,043 --> 00:06:18,874
I enjoyed working with...
94
00:06:18,876 --> 00:06:20,459
MAN: What is it?
95
00:06:22,030 --> 00:06:24,241
I live in a gang-infested neighborhood,
96
00:06:24,243 --> 00:06:25,549
and I've been tryin' to move out,
97
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:27,219
but I can't afford the
rent in the good areas.
98
00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:30,162
If I made a little bit more...
99
00:06:30,164 --> 00:06:34,331
Sir, I got hit by a stray
bullet on my way to work today.
100
00:06:36,531 --> 00:06:37,964
Exciting.
101
00:06:37,966 --> 00:06:40,294
Just like in the movies.
102
00:06:40,296 --> 00:06:41,417
Yeah.
103
00:06:41,419 --> 00:06:43,555
Yeah, the movies.
104
00:06:43,557 --> 00:06:45,170
But if not for the thick new set
105
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:46,971
of bank policies and
procedures you gave us to read,
106
00:06:46,973 --> 00:06:50,657
then I'd have a bullet
in my spine, you know.
107
00:06:50,659 --> 00:06:52,160
You're welcome.
108
00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:52,995
Huh?
109
00:06:54,275 --> 00:06:55,942
I saved your life.
110
00:06:57,075 --> 00:06:58,616
Yeah, you saved my life.
111
00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:02,785
So, hurry back to get your
cash drawer ready, #0356.
112
00:07:03,525 --> 00:07:05,692
(GUNFIRE)
113
00:07:19,308 --> 00:07:20,141
Natasha!
114
00:07:22,052 --> 00:07:24,584
Issue a press release stating
that my new bank policies
115
00:07:24,586 --> 00:07:26,706
are reducing gang violence.
116
00:07:26,708 --> 00:07:27,539
Yes, sir.
117
00:07:27,541 --> 00:07:28,374
Now!
118
00:07:34,061 --> 00:07:36,479
Cafe caramel, sugar-free, kosher soy,
119
00:07:36,481 --> 00:07:39,347
extra whip, extra shot, extra hot...
120
00:07:39,349 --> 00:07:41,450
Extra high maintenance.
121
00:07:41,452 --> 00:07:43,816
My name is Sid, not Kid.
122
00:07:43,818 --> 00:07:46,961
Sorry, sir, but it says Kid on the cup.
123
00:07:46,963 --> 00:07:51,130
But C-I-D would be Cid, as in cider.
124
00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:54,326
You're absolutely right.
125
00:07:54,328 --> 00:07:56,245
Drink is ready for Cid.
126
00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:02,679
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
127
00:08:06,438 --> 00:08:10,116
"Celebrate the 40th
anniversary of the man
128
00:08:10,118 --> 00:08:12,035
"we most love to hate."
129
00:08:13,259 --> 00:08:14,176
Thoughtful.
130
00:08:16,373 --> 00:08:17,206
I know...
131
00:08:18,593 --> 00:08:22,176
Every man of stature
needs a letter opener.
132
00:08:43,691 --> 00:08:45,082
Natasha!
133
00:08:45,084 --> 00:08:48,334
(ENERGETIC ROCK MUSIC)
134
00:09:08,508 --> 00:09:10,289
The cream was too cold!
135
00:09:10,291 --> 00:09:12,342
It must first sit out for five minutes
136
00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:14,917
after being removed from the refrigerator!
137
00:09:14,919 --> 00:09:17,582
I'm sorry, Mr. Hassole,
I'll remember next time.
138
00:09:17,584 --> 00:09:21,584
This is not the first
time you've made coffee!
139
00:09:22,730 --> 00:09:26,397
(PACING INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
140
00:09:31,244 --> 00:09:33,581
What have I told you about the dress code?
141
00:09:33,583 --> 00:09:36,275
Short skirts and shaved legs.
142
00:09:36,277 --> 00:09:37,110
Fix it!
143
00:09:39,273 --> 00:09:41,440
(YELLING)
144
00:09:50,127 --> 00:09:51,044
Actually...
145
00:09:52,143 --> 00:09:53,226
It's perfect.
146
00:09:54,178 --> 00:09:58,345
(CONTEMPLATIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
147
00:10:06,858 --> 00:10:09,512
I'll be your sponsor for
your work visa, Natasha.
148
00:10:09,514 --> 00:10:11,192
Oh, thank you!
149
00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:12,373
Thank you, sir!
150
00:10:12,375 --> 00:10:14,608
Under three conditions.
151
00:10:14,610 --> 00:10:17,121
Rule number one, I'm a leg man,
152
00:10:17,123 --> 00:10:20,332
so short skirts even during the winter.
153
00:10:20,334 --> 00:10:23,550
Rule number two, whenever
you feel the wind
154
00:10:23,552 --> 00:10:25,534
blow through your hair,
155
00:10:25,536 --> 00:10:28,517
it's time to shave your legs.
156
00:10:28,519 --> 00:10:31,436
And rule number three, stay single.
157
00:10:35,288 --> 00:10:38,141
You are not stuck working for him.
158
00:10:38,143 --> 00:10:41,726
Marry an American and
you become a citizen.
159
00:10:43,938 --> 00:10:46,652
And what will become of
my parents and two children,
160
00:10:46,654 --> 00:10:49,932
all of whom live with
me and that I support?
161
00:10:49,934 --> 00:10:51,934
No, marry me, Natasha.
162
00:10:52,853 --> 00:10:56,266
You'll be happy waking
up in my arms everyday.
163
00:10:56,268 --> 00:10:58,797
Rule number three...
164
00:10:58,799 --> 00:11:00,549
I must remain single.
165
00:11:06,013 --> 00:11:08,467
We'll see about that Julian.
166
00:11:08,469 --> 00:11:11,395
I know people in Washington.
167
00:11:11,397 --> 00:11:15,480
(SENTIMENTAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
168
00:11:16,669 --> 00:11:19,730
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
169
00:11:19,732 --> 00:11:22,732
My bucket list is almost complete.
170
00:11:25,330 --> 00:11:27,226
Birthday party.
171
00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:30,099
Being the envy of everyone I know.
172
00:11:30,101 --> 00:11:31,934
Now, to my to-do list.
173
00:11:33,775 --> 00:11:35,108
Nailing Natasha.
174
00:11:37,603 --> 00:11:38,865
The little people are working,
175
00:11:38,867 --> 00:11:40,990
and why you must ask?
176
00:11:40,992 --> 00:11:44,492
It's because they always wanna be like me.
177
00:11:53,125 --> 00:11:56,542
The people that I know in Washington...
178
00:11:58,867 --> 00:12:03,034
They work for the people
that he knows in Washington.
179
00:12:03,244 --> 00:12:04,758
(SENTIMENTAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
180
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:08,545
Slavery is not illegal if
you know what you're doing.
181
00:12:08,547 --> 00:12:09,880
And Julian does.
182
00:12:17,395 --> 00:12:20,184
Let that be a lesson to you.
183
00:12:20,186 --> 00:12:22,853
You have made your bed, Natasha.
184
00:12:25,506 --> 00:12:27,996
Return to your self-imposed hell,
185
00:12:27,998 --> 00:12:29,331
and sleep in it.
186
00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:40,554
JULIAN: Are you done?
187
00:12:40,556 --> 00:12:42,368
Almost, Julian.
188
00:12:42,370 --> 00:12:44,703
JULIAN: It's Mr. Hassole.
189
00:12:45,839 --> 00:12:47,938
Sorry, Mr. Hassle.
190
00:12:47,940 --> 00:12:49,523
JULIAN: Hassole.
191
00:12:51,537 --> 00:12:53,204
Sorry, Mr. Hassle.
192
00:12:54,743 --> 00:12:57,615
JULIAN: Not Hassle, Hassole.
193
00:12:57,617 --> 00:12:58,959
Hassholes.
194
00:12:58,961 --> 00:13:01,183
JULIAN: Asshole not Hassole!
195
00:13:01,185 --> 00:13:03,368
God dammit, you see what you made me do?
196
00:13:03,370 --> 00:13:05,025
Hassole!
197
00:13:05,027 --> 00:13:05,860
Hassle!
198
00:13:09,141 --> 00:13:10,397
JULIAN: Nevermind.
199
00:13:10,399 --> 00:13:13,316
Sorry, sorry, Mr. Hasshole, okay.
200
00:13:18,404 --> 00:13:22,321
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
201
00:13:46,660 --> 00:13:50,569
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
202
00:13:50,571 --> 00:13:51,404
Jim!
203
00:13:52,574 --> 00:13:54,128
MARY: I'm late!
204
00:13:54,130 --> 00:13:55,744
You can't blame me this time.
205
00:13:55,746 --> 00:13:57,355
Shut up.
206
00:13:57,357 --> 00:14:00,159
I'm sorry, it's just I'm nervous
207
00:14:00,161 --> 00:14:02,511
about my boss' birthday party.
208
00:14:02,513 --> 00:14:05,317
Yeah, okay, Mom, sure.
209
00:14:05,319 --> 00:14:08,319
I'll be back in a couple of hours.
210
00:14:12,947 --> 00:14:16,053
Party's in the hotel,
so I won't be far away.
211
00:14:16,055 --> 00:14:18,539
If you need me, just shoot me a text.
212
00:14:18,541 --> 00:14:20,374
Okay, Mom, have fun.
213
00:14:21,340 --> 00:14:22,590
See you soon.
214
00:14:24,794 --> 00:14:25,961
You stay here.
215
00:14:30,026 --> 00:14:34,193
(BARKING)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
216
00:14:40,342 --> 00:14:42,500
(YELLING)
217
00:14:42,502 --> 00:14:46,071
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(SCREAMING)
218
00:14:46,073 --> 00:14:48,990
(SOFT PIANO MUSIC)
219
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:53,362
My workers are throwin' me an envy party
220
00:14:53,364 --> 00:14:55,364
to celebrate my success.
221
00:14:56,603 --> 00:14:59,144
And my 40th birthday.
222
00:14:59,146 --> 00:15:00,748
Any tips for me, Senor?
223
00:15:00,750 --> 00:15:02,810
So, that I might find my success one day?
224
00:15:02,812 --> 00:15:05,443
Get into a time-machine,
225
00:15:05,445 --> 00:15:08,137
and go back 40 years...
226
00:15:08,139 --> 00:15:10,010
Be born white...
227
00:15:10,012 --> 00:15:12,290
And finish high school.
228
00:15:12,292 --> 00:15:14,320
Go to an Ivy League college,
229
00:15:14,322 --> 00:15:16,727
screw over everyone that you know,
230
00:15:16,729 --> 00:15:18,337
lie, cheat, and steal from everyone,
231
00:15:18,339 --> 00:15:20,348
including the government,
232
00:15:20,350 --> 00:15:21,767
and then maybe...
233
00:15:23,919 --> 00:15:26,002
Maybe you can be like me.
234
00:15:26,878 --> 00:15:29,128
That's a good tip, Senor.
235
00:15:31,562 --> 00:15:32,570
(GUNFIRE)
236
00:15:32,572 --> 00:15:34,739
(REVVING)
237
00:15:38,355 --> 00:15:40,683
Jesus was a freakin' hippie.
238
00:15:40,685 --> 00:15:44,675
Help the poor, the meek, and
those who hunger and thirst?
239
00:15:44,677 --> 00:15:46,008
Well, I hunger and thirsted too,
240
00:15:46,010 --> 00:15:48,717
and I went out and got
my own food and drink.
241
00:15:48,719 --> 00:15:50,741
Screw faith and love.
242
00:15:50,743 --> 00:15:53,408
Money, connections, power,
243
00:15:53,410 --> 00:15:56,104
it's the only way to
make it in this world.
244
00:15:56,106 --> 00:15:59,606
There's no time for birthday parties, son.
245
00:16:00,891 --> 00:16:02,687
So, what's our destination?
246
00:16:02,689 --> 00:16:04,031
I can't tell you, Senor.
247
00:16:04,033 --> 00:16:05,587
My specific instructions.
248
00:16:05,589 --> 00:16:08,407
Dang! I thought you
might slip up and tell me.
249
00:16:08,409 --> 00:16:11,909
(BOLD INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
250
00:16:26,499 --> 00:16:28,083
It's the same place I bring my workers
251
00:16:28,085 --> 00:16:30,000
for our bank Christmas parties.
252
00:16:30,002 --> 00:16:31,862
So, it's a good one, no?
253
00:16:31,864 --> 00:16:33,081
Good enough for them,
254
00:16:33,083 --> 00:16:36,750
- but I deserve better.
- Indeed you do, Senor.
255
00:16:38,590 --> 00:16:40,185
Let that be a lesson to you, homie.
256
00:16:40,187 --> 00:16:41,562
A self-made man like myself,
257
00:16:41,564 --> 00:16:44,814
we don't go around askin' for handouts.
258
00:16:45,710 --> 00:16:49,210
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
259
00:16:55,196 --> 00:16:57,361
Where's the meeting room?
260
00:16:57,363 --> 00:16:59,136
Across the lobby, down the hallway,
261
00:16:59,138 --> 00:17:01,742
last room on the left.
262
00:17:01,744 --> 00:17:02,847
How did you know?
263
00:17:02,849 --> 00:17:05,038
Mr. Hassole, you've
been hosting your bank
264
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:06,966
Christmas parties here
for the last 20 years,
265
00:17:06,968 --> 00:17:08,749
and I've worked with you every time.
266
00:17:08,751 --> 00:17:11,249
No, no, I would've remembered that face
267
00:17:11,251 --> 00:17:13,448
and that hideous hairdo.
268
00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:15,649
It looks like a glazed donut (LAUGHS).
269
00:17:15,651 --> 00:17:16,877
DOLORES: Thanks for the compliment.
270
00:17:16,879 --> 00:17:18,159
It wasn't.
271
00:17:18,161 --> 00:17:21,257
You truly are an
unforgettable individual.
272
00:17:21,259 --> 00:17:24,387
I'm someone people never ever forget.
273
00:17:24,389 --> 00:17:26,234
What I remember most about you
274
00:17:26,236 --> 00:17:28,385
was there was always
something drastically wrong,
275
00:17:28,387 --> 00:17:30,012
which caused you to withhold a tip,
276
00:17:30,014 --> 00:17:32,273
and got me bumped back down to a maid.
277
00:17:32,275 --> 00:17:36,008
Tipping is a reward for
exemplary service, not charity.
278
00:17:36,010 --> 00:17:38,257
I don't have the brain capacity to dwell
279
00:17:38,259 --> 00:17:40,389
on such tedious matters.
280
00:17:40,391 --> 00:17:44,268
You obviously have the
ample capacity to do so.
281
00:17:44,270 --> 00:17:48,437
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
(YELLING)
282
00:17:51,521 --> 00:17:53,087
Speaking of tipping,
283
00:17:53,089 --> 00:17:56,703
your father was always a great tipper.
284
00:17:56,705 --> 00:17:57,705
He's dead!
285
00:17:58,626 --> 00:18:00,669
Now, will you please do your job,
286
00:18:00,671 --> 00:18:02,697
and lead me to the meeting room.
287
00:18:02,699 --> 00:18:06,804
Over the years, you have
taught me so many lessons.
288
00:18:06,806 --> 00:18:08,090
Well, I'm just curious.
289
00:18:08,092 --> 00:18:10,375
Has anyone ever taught you a lesson?
290
00:18:10,377 --> 00:18:11,560
(LAUGHS)
291
00:18:11,562 --> 00:18:14,707
Excellent and interesting question,
292
00:18:14,709 --> 00:18:15,542
Dolores.
293
00:18:17,199 --> 00:18:19,496
But sadly, they have not.
294
00:18:19,498 --> 00:18:21,793
However, I always keep
my eyes and ears open
295
00:18:21,795 --> 00:18:24,413
because the lessons in life are many,
296
00:18:24,415 --> 00:18:26,462
and one must never stop learning.
297
00:18:26,464 --> 00:18:28,964
Indeed, Mr. Hassole, indeed.
298
00:18:29,814 --> 00:18:32,397
You are wise beyond your years.
299
00:18:34,350 --> 00:18:36,371
And so are...
300
00:18:36,373 --> 00:18:40,290
No, that's not true.
(LAUGHING)
301
00:18:43,066 --> 00:18:45,440
You still got the touch, Julian.
302
00:18:45,442 --> 00:18:48,275
(SLOW HARP MUSIC)
303
00:18:51,972 --> 00:18:54,070
You brought my dog, Brutus?
304
00:18:54,072 --> 00:18:55,905
Who's a good boy, hey!
305
00:18:57,272 --> 00:18:58,558
Do you work for me?
306
00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:01,010
Yes, sir, I'm Joseph.
307
00:19:01,012 --> 00:19:02,625
I brought your dog along for ya' special...
308
00:19:02,627 --> 00:19:06,044
Hey, buddy, he's a good one, yes he is.
309
00:19:08,212 --> 00:19:09,629
Everybody's here.
310
00:19:10,558 --> 00:19:12,141
This is so exciting.
311
00:19:12,143 --> 00:19:13,580
(LAUGHS)
312
00:19:13,582 --> 00:19:15,290
It's my first birthday party.
313
00:19:15,292 --> 00:19:17,209
Congratulations, sir.
314
00:19:19,716 --> 00:19:22,180
That's a very nice watch you have, sir.
315
00:19:22,182 --> 00:19:25,746
- It was my late dad's.
- May he rest in peace.
316
00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:29,165
More than likely he'll writhe in agony.
317
00:19:30,035 --> 00:19:32,284
It was always about you, wasn't it Dad?
318
00:19:32,286 --> 00:19:34,545
So, excuse me while I go and enjoy
319
00:19:34,547 --> 00:19:37,849
the birthday party that
I've always deserved!
320
00:19:37,851 --> 00:19:41,527
And you can't stop me because you're dead.
321
00:19:41,529 --> 00:19:42,545
Dead!
322
00:19:42,547 --> 00:19:45,087
Take a look at my office.
323
00:19:45,089 --> 00:19:46,089
You like it?
324
00:19:47,625 --> 00:19:50,586
What about my secretary
with the big, you know?
325
00:19:50,588 --> 00:19:53,253
I saw you checkin' her out.
326
00:19:53,255 --> 00:19:55,296
What about this watch?
327
00:19:55,298 --> 00:19:56,815
Dead.
328
00:19:56,817 --> 00:19:58,757
You like it?
329
00:19:58,759 --> 00:20:00,509
- Speak up.
- I like it.
330
00:20:01,455 --> 00:20:02,286
All this cool shit,
331
00:20:02,288 --> 00:20:04,561
I didn't get from havin' birthday parties.
332
00:20:04,563 --> 00:20:06,855
I got it from working hard.
333
00:20:06,857 --> 00:20:07,688
Dead!
334
00:20:07,690 --> 00:20:08,607
Dead, dead!
335
00:20:10,155 --> 00:20:10,988
Dead.
336
00:20:15,498 --> 00:20:18,165
You see, Dad, people do like me.
337
00:20:21,462 --> 00:20:24,545
(BOLD TRUMPET MUSIC)
338
00:20:44,082 --> 00:20:45,583
(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
339
00:20:45,585 --> 00:20:46,835
Absolutely not.
340
00:20:47,766 --> 00:20:50,273
(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
341
00:20:50,275 --> 00:20:53,598
He said, "We're carrying you, sir."
342
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,036
Oh, well, that's cool.
343
00:20:55,038 --> 00:20:58,055
I like people that know their place.
344
00:20:58,057 --> 00:20:59,557
You guys may lift.
345
00:21:02,532 --> 00:21:06,373
But if I spill my wine
on you, it's your fault.
346
00:21:06,375 --> 00:21:09,458
(BOLD TRUMPET MUSIC)
347
00:21:10,994 --> 00:21:12,823
If you guys are expecting a tip,
348
00:21:12,825 --> 00:21:14,634
you're gonna be waiting all night.
349
00:21:14,636 --> 00:21:15,615
Off with you now.
350
00:21:15,617 --> 00:21:16,924
(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
351
00:21:16,926 --> 00:21:19,593
Yeah, you do that, little thing.
352
00:21:23,030 --> 00:21:26,863
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
353
00:21:29,329 --> 00:21:32,161
I knew they were gay.
(GRUNTING)
354
00:21:32,163 --> 00:21:35,302
Make yourself useful and go officiate.
355
00:21:35,304 --> 00:21:37,554
(GRUNTING)
356
00:21:42,589 --> 00:21:46,344
The black one, of course,
they're better at everything.
357
00:21:46,346 --> 00:21:48,308
(LAUGHS)
358
00:21:48,310 --> 00:21:49,661
(LAUGHING)
359
00:21:49,663 --> 00:21:53,746
Better at everything that
doesn't require brains.
360
00:21:57,114 --> 00:22:00,781
(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
361
00:22:02,422 --> 00:22:05,505
(BOLD TRUMPET MUSIC)
362
00:22:09,666 --> 00:22:12,999
(MID-TEMPO WORLD MUSIC)
363
00:22:23,679 --> 00:22:25,637
Now, this is more like it.
364
00:22:25,639 --> 00:22:28,972
(MID-TEMPO WORLD MUSIC)
365
00:22:39,506 --> 00:22:42,423
Oh yeah.
(CHUCKLES)
366
00:22:55,046 --> 00:22:59,046
Don't be a tease, take
it all off, veiled bitch.
367
00:23:03,405 --> 00:23:05,444
(GAGGING)
368
00:23:05,446 --> 00:23:06,656
What the hell is that?
369
00:23:06,658 --> 00:23:08,885
They're called stretch marks.
370
00:23:08,887 --> 00:23:09,999
Put it back on.
371
00:23:10,001 --> 00:23:11,457
Something you get when
you bring a beautiful
372
00:23:11,459 --> 00:23:12,996
child into this world.
373
00:23:12,998 --> 00:23:14,868
No child is worth that.
374
00:23:14,870 --> 00:23:16,957
That sucked the beauty right off of you.
375
00:23:16,959 --> 00:23:18,459
You're an idiot.
376
00:23:19,514 --> 00:23:21,431
For a true emperor...
377
00:23:23,119 --> 00:23:26,009
We have exotic entertainers
from all over the world
378
00:23:26,011 --> 00:23:27,844
you are sure to enjoy.
379
00:23:30,816 --> 00:23:33,310
(LAUGHING)
380
00:23:33,312 --> 00:23:35,538
Sid! You two are dressed alike.
381
00:23:35,540 --> 00:23:36,858
Are you a couple?
382
00:23:36,860 --> 00:23:39,849
Don't look at me with those eyes.
383
00:23:39,851 --> 00:23:41,641
What's behind the tent?
384
00:23:41,643 --> 00:23:43,338
Let me guess.
385
00:23:43,340 --> 00:23:45,921
Boom!
(LAUGHING)
386
00:23:45,923 --> 00:23:48,103
WOMAN: Bombs are for
killing lots of people.
387
00:23:48,105 --> 00:23:52,272
But in this case, killing just
you would make it worth it.
388
00:23:52,393 --> 00:23:54,643
Touche, Arab bitch, touche.
389
00:23:58,812 --> 00:24:01,867
Enough with the small talk.
390
00:24:01,869 --> 00:24:04,286
Show me what's behind the curtain.
391
00:24:04,288 --> 00:24:06,119
WOMAN: No, it is forbidden.
392
00:24:06,121 --> 00:24:07,660
Forbidden my ass!
393
00:24:07,662 --> 00:24:10,883
Nobody says no to Julian C. Hassole!
394
00:24:10,885 --> 00:24:15,052
(HIGH-PITCHED SHRIEKING)
She's gonna blow!
395
00:24:27,095 --> 00:24:29,125
Guess I need a pallet cleanser.
396
00:24:29,127 --> 00:24:31,960
(SLOW HARP MUSIC)
397
00:24:33,259 --> 00:24:34,592
You may proceed.
398
00:24:35,724 --> 00:24:38,793
Than none was for a party,
399
00:24:38,795 --> 00:24:41,647
then all were for the state,
400
00:24:41,649 --> 00:24:44,390
then the great man helped the poor,
401
00:24:44,392 --> 00:24:47,002
and the poor man loved the great.
402
00:24:47,004 --> 00:24:48,903
The lands were fairly portioned,
403
00:24:48,905 --> 00:24:51,987
then spoils were fairly sold,
404
00:24:51,989 --> 00:24:56,156
the Romans were like brothers
in the brave days of old.
405
00:24:57,246 --> 00:25:01,413
Now, Roman is to Rome, and
more hateful than a foe.
406
00:25:02,441 --> 00:25:05,274
For the Tribunes beard the high...
407
00:25:06,836 --> 00:25:09,336
And the fathers grind the low.
408
00:25:11,764 --> 00:25:15,532
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
No! Great emperor!
409
00:25:15,534 --> 00:25:19,367
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
410
00:25:23,665 --> 00:25:26,665
That death nail was so well acted.
411
00:25:27,648 --> 00:25:28,481
Bravo!
412
00:25:33,918 --> 00:25:36,121
Oops.
(LAUGHING)
413
00:25:36,123 --> 00:25:40,290
(OFF-TUNE TRUMPETING)
(LAUGHING)
414
00:25:41,219 --> 00:25:44,179
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
415
00:25:44,181 --> 00:25:47,181
This is the greatest day of my life.
416
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:51,086
Maybe he can change.
417
00:25:51,088 --> 00:25:52,880
(LAUGHS)
418
00:25:52,882 --> 00:25:54,627
Speech, speech!
419
00:25:54,629 --> 00:25:55,843
(BOLD TRUMPET MUSIC)
420
00:25:55,845 --> 00:25:58,395
CROWD: Speech, speech!
421
00:25:58,397 --> 00:25:59,647
Speech, speech!
422
00:26:03,389 --> 00:26:05,389
(SIGHS)
423
00:26:06,334 --> 00:26:08,401
That's the purpose for a throne.
424
00:26:08,403 --> 00:26:12,570
So that Caesar can look
down upon his many subjects.
425
00:26:13,030 --> 00:26:14,498
And he's back.
426
00:26:14,500 --> 00:26:17,515
As I look down upon you all...
427
00:26:17,517 --> 00:26:21,684
I remember things that I
probably should have forgotten,
428
00:26:21,989 --> 00:26:23,322
like your names.
429
00:26:25,435 --> 00:26:27,935
But, there's Mary Come Lately.
430
00:26:29,529 --> 00:26:33,488
I call her that because
she always comes in late.
431
00:26:33,490 --> 00:26:35,399
Ly.
(LAUGHS)
432
00:26:35,401 --> 00:26:37,851
(DRUM ROLL)
433
00:26:37,853 --> 00:26:40,413
You may learn some day, Mary.
434
00:26:40,415 --> 00:26:42,821
Never more than five minutes late,
435
00:26:42,823 --> 00:26:44,384
and I always make up the time.
436
00:26:44,386 --> 00:26:46,026
So, what is it, like
thousands of dollars
437
00:26:46,028 --> 00:26:48,345
that you've lost for not being on time?
438
00:26:48,347 --> 00:26:51,458
It's my daughter,
she's afraid of the dog.
439
00:26:51,460 --> 00:26:52,963
How about instead of
bitching and moaning
440
00:26:52,965 --> 00:26:54,384
about it all the time,
441
00:26:54,386 --> 00:26:57,497
that you be apart of the solution?
442
00:26:57,499 --> 00:26:59,558
Place a blindfold over your daughter.
443
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:01,923
Put headphones on her with loud music.
444
00:27:01,925 --> 00:27:04,121
And then lead her to the car.
445
00:27:04,123 --> 00:27:05,456
Problem is solved.
446
00:27:05,458 --> 00:27:07,670
That sounds like a sensible solution.
447
00:27:07,672 --> 00:27:09,005
Who asked you?
448
00:27:10,661 --> 00:27:11,677
Sorry.
449
00:27:11,679 --> 00:27:13,811
I'll try his suggestion.
450
00:27:13,813 --> 00:27:17,063
God gave us a brain to use it, right?
451
00:27:18,448 --> 00:27:19,281
Right!
452
00:27:21,154 --> 00:27:22,711
Right.
453
00:27:22,713 --> 00:27:24,130
Jordan, my man!
454
00:27:25,136 --> 00:27:25,969
Wow.
455
00:27:26,941 --> 00:27:28,624
That's the first time he
actually referred to me
456
00:27:28,626 --> 00:27:31,247
by my name and not my teller number.
457
00:27:31,249 --> 00:27:32,372
He just calls you that because
458
00:27:32,374 --> 00:27:33,839
you remind him of Michael Jordan.
459
00:27:33,841 --> 00:27:36,738
What? No, that's crazy.
460
00:27:36,740 --> 00:27:37,911
Whoo!
461
00:27:37,913 --> 00:27:38,746
Swish!
462
00:27:40,851 --> 00:27:42,657
How's life in the hood?
463
00:27:42,659 --> 00:27:45,195
Must be dodgin' them bullets real good.
464
00:27:45,197 --> 00:27:48,084
No, one did get me, two weeks ago.
465
00:27:48,086 --> 00:27:49,654
That's why I had to
miss those days at work
466
00:27:49,656 --> 00:27:51,675
without pay, of course.
467
00:27:51,677 --> 00:27:52,654
Let that be a lesson to you...
468
00:27:52,656 --> 00:27:54,718
I know, you told me,
I gots to run faster.
469
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:58,282
That and don't live near black people.
470
00:27:58,284 --> 00:28:02,451
Indeed, so many tragic
moments in our lives...
471
00:28:02,750 --> 00:28:05,015
Or should I say your lives.
472
00:28:05,017 --> 00:28:07,143
Let me see if I can find someone
473
00:28:07,145 --> 00:28:10,228
with whom I can relate a happy story.
474
00:28:12,049 --> 00:28:13,378
Hmm.
475
00:28:13,380 --> 00:28:14,213
No luck.
476
00:28:15,779 --> 00:28:17,895
Of course, I have a tendency to dwell
477
00:28:17,897 --> 00:28:20,230
upon the bad things in life.
478
00:28:22,315 --> 00:28:23,565
Like you there.
479
00:28:25,099 --> 00:28:28,210
Um...
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
480
00:28:28,212 --> 00:28:29,264
Richard.
481
00:28:29,266 --> 00:28:30,406
That's it.
482
00:28:30,408 --> 00:28:32,260
We had a a business deal together, right?
483
00:28:32,262 --> 00:28:33,762
What was it again?
484
00:28:35,464 --> 00:28:39,214
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
485
00:28:45,957 --> 00:28:47,081
I was laid off.
486
00:28:47,083 --> 00:28:50,154
JULIAN: That was two years ago.
487
00:28:50,156 --> 00:28:53,940
But I can't seem to find another job.
488
00:28:53,942 --> 00:28:55,674
JULIAN: Interesting.
489
00:28:55,676 --> 00:28:58,343
Have you been reading the paper?
490
00:28:59,264 --> 00:29:03,347
Last Sunday, it contained
17,122 help wanted ads.
491
00:29:07,824 --> 00:29:09,982
(TAPPING)
492
00:29:09,984 --> 00:29:13,734
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
493
00:29:19,639 --> 00:29:21,129
I couldn't make my mortgage payment,
494
00:29:21,131 --> 00:29:24,750
- so you repossessed my house.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
495
00:29:24,752 --> 00:29:26,343
What you meant to say
was that the bank did.
496
00:29:26,345 --> 00:29:28,052
No, you did.
497
00:29:28,054 --> 00:29:30,156
Your underling advised
a reduction in payments,
498
00:29:30,158 --> 00:29:31,975
but you overruled him, saying, huh,
499
00:29:31,977 --> 00:29:33,949
"Let that be a lesson to you, Richard.
500
00:29:33,951 --> 00:29:37,367
"Don't bite off more than you can chew."
501
00:29:37,369 --> 00:29:39,452
What a valuable lesson.
502
00:29:40,946 --> 00:29:42,799
That's how we learn.
503
00:29:42,801 --> 00:29:43,718
By failing.
504
00:29:45,113 --> 00:29:46,928
No doubt you're in the better place now.
505
00:29:46,930 --> 00:29:50,847
My wife left me, and
now I live in a trailer!
506
00:29:52,121 --> 00:29:53,833
So, you're absolutely correct.
507
00:29:53,835 --> 00:29:57,721
If I want to go to a
better place, as you say,
508
00:29:57,723 --> 00:30:01,890
I just release the parking
brake and I go there.
509
00:30:02,285 --> 00:30:04,609
(DRUM ROLL)
(ASKEW TRUMPETING)
510
00:30:04,611 --> 00:30:05,499
(LAUGHS)
511
00:30:05,501 --> 00:30:07,332
You gave me my freedom.
512
00:30:07,334 --> 00:30:09,751
And no more ball and chain.
513
00:30:16,987 --> 00:30:19,102
I remember you quite well, Violet.
514
00:30:19,104 --> 00:30:21,876
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
515
00:30:21,878 --> 00:30:22,748
It's Fran.
516
00:30:22,750 --> 00:30:24,525
Eh, it's been a while.
517
00:30:24,527 --> 00:30:26,306
But the last time you were in my office,
518
00:30:26,308 --> 00:30:29,327
I was giving you a big fat bonus.
519
00:30:29,329 --> 00:30:31,163
Finally, an upbeat story.
520
00:30:31,165 --> 00:30:33,002
Close, Mr. Hasshole.
521
00:30:33,004 --> 00:30:35,254
JULIAN: I've got good news!
522
00:30:35,256 --> 00:30:38,421
The incentive bonus pool is
the highest it's ever been.
523
00:30:38,423 --> 00:30:41,599
Big money, big money, big money.
524
00:30:41,601 --> 00:30:43,064
Receiving one's bonus is contingent
525
00:30:43,066 --> 00:30:45,149
upon meeting one's goals.
526
00:30:47,712 --> 00:30:50,462
And you failed to meet your goal.
527
00:30:53,674 --> 00:30:55,507
Better luck next year.
528
00:30:56,357 --> 00:30:57,574
You took away my bonus,
529
00:30:57,576 --> 00:31:00,292
claiming I didn't meet my sales quota.
530
00:31:00,294 --> 00:31:01,540
Well, had you?
531
00:31:01,542 --> 00:31:03,146
I was on target to exceed my quota,
532
00:31:03,148 --> 00:31:05,705
- but my son became ill...
- Wait, wait, hold up now!
533
00:31:05,707 --> 00:31:07,036
Let me stop you right there?
534
00:31:07,038 --> 00:31:09,038
Did you meet your quota?
535
00:31:10,121 --> 00:31:12,121
I was 1% from it.
536
00:31:13,236 --> 00:31:15,605
A quota is a quota.
537
00:31:15,607 --> 00:31:17,061
No exceptions.
538
00:31:17,063 --> 00:31:20,563
What? Because you got yourself knocked up.
539
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:24,025
Let that be a lesson to you!
540
00:31:24,027 --> 00:31:27,257
Don't go makin' babies
unless you are 100% sure
541
00:31:27,259 --> 00:31:31,159
you can afford them without
government assistance.
542
00:31:31,161 --> 00:31:35,328
Come on, now, someone share
a nice Hallmark memory of me.
543
00:31:35,913 --> 00:31:37,896
Okay, well, then allow
me to share an example
544
00:31:37,898 --> 00:31:40,148
of how I helped all of you.
545
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:43,312
Cue some music, boys.
546
00:31:43,314 --> 00:31:45,564
This is gonna be heartfelt.
547
00:31:46,522 --> 00:31:49,226
(SENTIMENTAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
548
00:31:49,228 --> 00:31:53,395
September 15th, 2008, Lehman
Brothers filed for bankruptcy.
549
00:31:54,331 --> 00:31:57,749
That day employees hugged
colleagues traumatized,
550
00:31:57,751 --> 00:31:59,635
as they carried boxes of their belongings
551
00:31:59,637 --> 00:32:01,042
outside of their offices.
552
00:32:01,044 --> 00:32:04,418
You guys were terrified and nervous,
553
00:32:04,420 --> 00:32:07,011
expecting the same, of course, I wasn't.
554
00:32:07,013 --> 00:32:09,672
I had a two million dollar
golden parachute waiting on me.
555
00:32:09,674 --> 00:32:11,867
(LAUGHS)
556
00:32:11,869 --> 00:32:13,187
But what did I do?
557
00:32:13,189 --> 00:32:16,956
I took the bank's jet and
flew out to Washington.
558
00:32:16,958 --> 00:32:19,091
And I spoke to Congress,
and I told 'em, I said,
559
00:32:19,093 --> 00:32:20,474
"We're too big to fail.
560
00:32:20,476 --> 00:32:23,192
"Think about all the lives
that would be ruined."
561
00:32:23,194 --> 00:32:25,261
And those idiots in Congress bought it!
562
00:32:25,263 --> 00:32:27,910
And all of you kept your jobs!
563
00:32:27,912 --> 00:32:30,386
Of course, I was hopin'
to be without a job
564
00:32:30,388 --> 00:32:32,638
two million dollars richer.
565
00:32:33,513 --> 00:32:35,542
Okay, now it's your turn
to tell me a happy story
566
00:32:35,544 --> 00:32:38,044
about how I helped all of you.
567
00:32:39,753 --> 00:32:43,396
Well, I must say, you're
throwin' me this wonderful party.
568
00:32:43,398 --> 00:32:47,300
That's the nicest thing
anybody's ever done, thank you.
569
00:32:47,302 --> 00:32:48,293
CROWD: You're welcome.
570
00:32:48,295 --> 00:32:51,246
Speak up, share those touching moments!
571
00:32:51,248 --> 00:32:53,441
No need to wait until my
funeral to get up there
572
00:32:53,443 --> 00:32:56,223
and share your heart out.
573
00:32:56,225 --> 00:33:00,025
Now is the time to shed
your tears upon me.
574
00:33:00,027 --> 00:33:01,557
We have gifts for you.
575
00:33:01,559 --> 00:33:05,726
I think the presents will
speak for themselves.
576
00:33:05,780 --> 00:33:07,082
Right you are, old buddy.
577
00:33:07,084 --> 00:33:08,947
I'm happy to see that
you bare no ill feelings
578
00:33:08,949 --> 00:33:11,551
about the Board of Directors
replacing you with me.
579
00:33:11,553 --> 00:33:13,865
Now, give me those
presents you took your time
580
00:33:13,867 --> 00:33:16,617
and meager incomes to get for me.
581
00:33:21,051 --> 00:33:25,218
(BARKING AND GROWLING)
(YELLING)
582
00:33:28,531 --> 00:33:30,289
How much longer?
583
00:33:30,291 --> 00:33:31,374
I'm starving.
584
00:33:35,449 --> 00:33:38,463
(BARKING AND GROWLING)
(YELLING)
585
00:33:38,465 --> 00:33:39,715
It's been sent.
586
00:33:40,594 --> 00:33:44,761
(BARKING AND GROWLING)
(YELLING)
587
00:33:51,250 --> 00:33:53,326
I'm gonna go get some food.
588
00:33:53,328 --> 00:33:56,828
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
589
00:33:59,376 --> 00:34:02,543
(BOLD TRUMPET MUSIC)
590
00:34:11,012 --> 00:34:13,407
Take it down a notch!
591
00:34:13,409 --> 00:34:14,659
Mr. Hasshole.
592
00:34:16,324 --> 00:34:17,157
Hasshole?
593
00:34:19,363 --> 00:34:20,951
Hasshole?
594
00:34:20,953 --> 00:34:23,546
It's pronounced Hassole! Dammit!
595
00:34:23,548 --> 00:34:25,860
What is it, Chang?
596
00:34:25,862 --> 00:34:28,609
It's pronounced Xiang.
597
00:34:28,611 --> 00:34:29,681
Chang!
598
00:34:29,683 --> 00:34:30,562
Xiang.
599
00:34:30,564 --> 00:34:31,546
Chang!
600
00:34:31,548 --> 00:34:32,626
XIANG: Xiang.
601
00:34:32,628 --> 00:34:34,186
Chang!
602
00:34:34,188 --> 00:34:35,255
Xiang.
603
00:34:35,257 --> 00:34:36,119
Chang!
604
00:34:36,121 --> 00:34:37,130
- Xiang.
- Chang.
605
00:34:37,132 --> 00:34:38,263
Xiang.
606
00:34:38,265 --> 00:34:39,432
Chang!
607
00:34:39,434 --> 00:34:40,725
- Xiang.
- Chang.
608
00:34:40,727 --> 00:34:42,093
- Xiang.
- Chang.
609
00:34:42,095 --> 00:34:43,464
- Xiang.
- Chang.
610
00:34:43,466 --> 00:34:44,297
Xiang.
611
00:34:44,299 --> 00:34:47,613
Dammit, I cannot hear the difference!
612
00:34:47,615 --> 00:34:49,782
It means sweet smelling.
613
00:34:50,947 --> 00:34:54,127
Hmm, first time I ever
heard of garlic and onions
614
00:34:54,129 --> 00:34:56,629
referred to as sweet smelling.
615
00:34:57,881 --> 00:34:58,881
Me no likey.
616
00:35:02,662 --> 00:35:05,715
Me think you will likey this.
617
00:35:05,717 --> 00:35:09,462
Hmm, okay, if this is a gift certificate
618
00:35:09,464 --> 00:35:11,754
for me love you long time,
619
00:35:11,756 --> 00:35:14,335
I'm gonna have to decline.
620
00:35:14,337 --> 00:35:15,981
I adhere strictly to the bank's policies
621
00:35:15,983 --> 00:35:19,650
on non-discrimination
and sexual harassment.
622
00:35:23,188 --> 00:35:26,105
Every king must have his bodyguard.
623
00:35:28,534 --> 00:35:29,451
Allow me.
624
00:35:41,247 --> 00:35:42,576
Nice.
625
00:35:42,578 --> 00:35:45,147
That's some paperweight.
626
00:35:45,149 --> 00:35:48,049
It actually looks like it
could really hurt someone.
627
00:35:48,051 --> 00:35:48,882
(SNIFFING)
628
00:35:48,884 --> 00:35:51,634
Kind of like your breath, my God.
629
00:35:53,403 --> 00:35:54,236
Oops.
630
00:35:54,238 --> 00:35:56,136
(YELLING)
631
00:35:56,138 --> 00:35:57,055
So sorry.
632
00:35:58,248 --> 00:35:59,820
Get it off of me!
633
00:35:59,822 --> 00:36:01,800
(YELLING)
634
00:36:01,802 --> 00:36:03,419
Get it off of me!
635
00:36:03,421 --> 00:36:05,421
What's the magic word?
636
00:36:06,512 --> 00:36:08,537
Please, please remove your martial arts
637
00:36:08,539 --> 00:36:12,540
weapon from my foot!
(SHRIEKING)
638
00:36:12,542 --> 00:36:14,264
Muthafuckin' asian whore!
639
00:36:14,266 --> 00:36:15,514
(YELLING)
640
00:36:15,516 --> 00:36:19,349
(WEIGHTY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
641
00:36:20,563 --> 00:36:23,632
Let that be a lesson to you.
642
00:36:23,634 --> 00:36:25,051
We Chinese say...
643
00:36:26,292 --> 00:36:30,459
"One person's disaster is
another person's delight."
644
00:36:35,637 --> 00:36:39,804
(WEIGHTY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
645
00:36:40,149 --> 00:36:43,732
(EERIE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
646
00:36:44,917 --> 00:36:47,044
Fuckin' crazy bitch.
647
00:36:47,046 --> 00:36:49,789
Come Monday, you're out of here.
648
00:36:49,791 --> 00:36:53,208
Do your job, and keep those crazies away!
649
00:36:54,427 --> 00:36:55,344
Yes, sir.
650
00:36:57,036 --> 00:37:00,786
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
651
00:37:05,769 --> 00:37:08,769
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
652
00:37:14,341 --> 00:37:18,508
Natasha, I was hopin'
that you would be my gift.
653
00:37:19,675 --> 00:37:23,687
The thing you fantasize
about the most...
654
00:37:23,689 --> 00:37:25,772
Your own rule number one.
655
00:37:28,506 --> 00:37:29,506
Your legs.
656
00:37:31,274 --> 00:37:32,967
Aha.
(LAUGHS)
657
00:37:32,969 --> 00:37:34,386
Guys, help me up.
658
00:37:46,571 --> 00:37:48,941
Happy birthday, Julian.
659
00:37:48,943 --> 00:37:53,110
Here are my lovely legs around
your neck as you fantasize,
660
00:37:53,542 --> 00:37:55,848
- they're so soft!
- Ow!
661
00:37:55,850 --> 00:37:58,329
Ow! Rule number two!
662
00:37:58,331 --> 00:38:00,364
Shave your legs.
(YELLING)
663
00:38:00,366 --> 00:38:01,867
Russian razor burn!
664
00:38:01,869 --> 00:38:03,371
Russian razor burn!
665
00:38:03,373 --> 00:38:05,320
(YELLING)
666
00:38:05,322 --> 00:38:07,044
Make it stop!
667
00:38:07,046 --> 00:38:08,478
Make it stop!
668
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:12,480
Guys, set me down.
(SHRIEKING)
669
00:38:24,478 --> 00:38:26,444
Don't worry, I'll help.
670
00:38:26,446 --> 00:38:28,088
(YELLING)
671
00:38:28,090 --> 00:38:29,507
Shit! It's hot!
672
00:38:30,465 --> 00:38:31,879
What the hell are you doing?
673
00:38:31,881 --> 00:38:35,631
Someone would put
vodka on towel, so sorry.
674
00:38:36,545 --> 00:38:38,295
But it stop bleeding.
675
00:38:44,436 --> 00:38:45,853
Finally, a man.
676
00:38:47,034 --> 00:38:49,597
These bitches are crazy, right, John?
677
00:38:49,599 --> 00:38:52,583
- What bitches?
- I meant in general.
678
00:38:52,585 --> 00:38:54,799
What woman isn't though?
679
00:38:54,801 --> 00:38:56,951
Your mother was nice.
680
00:38:56,953 --> 00:38:59,149
She left my father and I.
681
00:38:59,151 --> 00:39:01,060
That sounds like a bitch to me.
682
00:39:01,062 --> 00:39:05,229
Julian, I knew your father
as a self-avowed prick,
683
00:39:05,348 --> 00:39:07,515
and you his prick protege.
684
00:39:08,848 --> 00:39:10,848
It was too much for her.
685
00:39:12,301 --> 00:39:15,037
You brought me a tennis racket.
686
00:39:15,039 --> 00:39:17,872
Yes, well, it was your father's.
687
00:39:20,801 --> 00:39:24,357
You and your father made
quite the doubles team.
688
00:39:24,359 --> 00:39:26,291
Although, you cheated a bit too much.
689
00:39:26,293 --> 00:39:28,100
I didn't think you noticed.
690
00:39:28,102 --> 00:39:30,526
Everyone notices how you cheat, Julian.
691
00:39:30,528 --> 00:39:34,072
Yet, I continue to get away with it.
692
00:39:34,074 --> 00:39:36,324
I'll tell you what, John...
693
00:39:38,035 --> 00:39:40,957
You can keep that tennis racket.
694
00:39:40,959 --> 00:39:43,673
He was your friend, not mine.
695
00:39:43,675 --> 00:39:45,577
I just came from the funeral home,
696
00:39:45,579 --> 00:39:47,412
said my final goodbye.
697
00:39:48,311 --> 00:39:50,132
There is still time if you wanna head over
698
00:39:50,134 --> 00:39:51,528
and view his cremation.
699
00:39:51,530 --> 00:39:55,045
And leave the only birthday
party of my entire life?
700
00:39:55,047 --> 00:39:58,390
Show your respect
for all he did for you.
701
00:39:58,392 --> 00:40:01,165
He asked you if you
wanted money and power,
702
00:40:01,167 --> 00:40:03,968
you said yes, and he helped you attain it.
703
00:40:03,970 --> 00:40:07,970
What the hell kind of
kid knows what he wants?
704
00:40:10,250 --> 00:40:12,333
I'll tell you what, John.
705
00:40:14,275 --> 00:40:17,025
If the party ends early enough...
706
00:40:19,718 --> 00:40:22,822
Maybe I'll go down to the cremation.
707
00:40:22,824 --> 00:40:24,671
That'd be nice, Julian.
708
00:40:24,673 --> 00:40:26,506
To light the burner.
709
00:40:30,395 --> 00:40:32,993
Happy 40th birthday, Julian.
710
00:40:32,995 --> 00:40:34,483
That was a great speech.
711
00:40:34,485 --> 00:40:38,323
You summed up what many of
us are feeling right now.
712
00:40:38,325 --> 00:40:39,242
I'm glad.
713
00:40:40,286 --> 00:40:43,810
You know, people hate to hear
about their own shortcomings.
714
00:40:43,812 --> 00:40:45,538
But it's dealing with your problems
715
00:40:45,540 --> 00:40:48,155
that is the first step
towards overcoming them.
716
00:40:48,157 --> 00:40:50,074
Well said, well said.
717
00:40:52,056 --> 00:40:54,723
You know I'm Jewish?
(LAUGHS)
718
00:40:54,725 --> 00:40:57,793
Like the yamaka and the
nose doesn't give it away?
719
00:40:57,795 --> 00:41:00,378
(LAUGHS)
Honk!
720
00:41:01,488 --> 00:41:03,537
I mean, come on, you celebrate
721
00:41:03,539 --> 00:41:06,187
all of the Christian
holidays like the rest of us,
722
00:41:06,189 --> 00:41:10,356
and then observe all
of the shalom ones too.
723
00:41:10,464 --> 00:41:12,736
It's a bit excessive.
724
00:41:12,738 --> 00:41:14,571
But who am I to judge?
725
00:41:17,162 --> 00:41:20,088
Between you and me it may have contributed
726
00:41:20,090 --> 00:41:22,143
towards your demotion.
727
00:41:22,145 --> 00:41:25,645
We're running a business, not a synagogue.
728
00:41:26,707 --> 00:41:29,790
You're absolutely right, as always.
729
00:41:31,864 --> 00:41:36,021
But I've learned my
lesson on that, thank you.
730
00:41:36,023 --> 00:41:38,856
I'm glad my advice has hit home.
731
00:41:40,363 --> 00:41:44,530
Right, at the synagogue
this morning, Rabbi Goldberg...
732
00:41:44,573 --> 00:41:46,656
(LAUGHS)
733
00:41:49,036 --> 00:41:51,002
Rabbi Goldberg?
734
00:41:51,004 --> 00:41:52,990
Can you get anymore Jewish than that?
735
00:41:52,992 --> 00:41:54,729
Rabbi Goldberg?
736
00:41:54,731 --> 00:41:57,809
At this point, I would like
to excuse the entertainment.
737
00:41:57,811 --> 00:41:58,937
Thank you very much for coming,
738
00:41:58,939 --> 00:42:02,390
but we want to spend some
quality alone time with Julian.
739
00:42:02,392 --> 00:42:06,559
I'm just kidding.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
740
00:42:13,108 --> 00:42:16,408
People are so overly sensitive these days.
741
00:42:16,410 --> 00:42:19,349
(SUSTAINED STRING MUSIC)
(SLAMMING)
742
00:42:19,351 --> 00:42:21,336
It's okay, it's okay.
743
00:42:21,338 --> 00:42:22,800
Carry on as you were.
744
00:42:22,802 --> 00:42:26,969
The Rabbi Whoopi Goldberg.
(LAUGHING)
745
00:42:26,980 --> 00:42:29,366
He asked the gathering
746
00:42:29,368 --> 00:42:32,096
the following hypothetical question:
747
00:42:32,098 --> 00:42:36,181
"Raise your hand if, upon
finding a time machine,
748
00:42:37,078 --> 00:42:41,245
"you would travel back to
Braunau am Inn, Austria-Hungary,
749
00:42:43,013 --> 00:42:44,513
"April 20, 1889...
750
00:42:46,730 --> 00:42:49,980
"and smother the newborn Adolf Hitler?"
751
00:42:51,153 --> 00:42:53,820
(SLOW DRUMMING)
752
00:42:55,561 --> 00:42:57,324
It took a few seconds for the first
753
00:42:57,326 --> 00:43:00,471
brave person to raise his hand,
754
00:43:00,473 --> 00:43:02,640
but soon, others followed.
755
00:43:04,018 --> 00:43:07,363
And eventually, the
entire synagogue agreed
756
00:43:07,365 --> 00:43:10,356
that the life of the newborn infant,
757
00:43:10,358 --> 00:43:13,692
no matter how innocent
it was at that point,
758
00:43:13,694 --> 00:43:17,237
must be ended to stop him from turning
759
00:43:17,239 --> 00:43:21,406
into the evil monster that
history will never forget.
760
00:43:24,687 --> 00:43:27,270
Even the Rabbi raised his hand.
761
00:43:33,694 --> 00:43:35,469
Are you done?
762
00:43:35,471 --> 00:43:37,627
What the hell was your point?
763
00:43:37,629 --> 00:43:38,712
You'll see.
764
00:43:39,855 --> 00:43:41,484
You'll see.
765
00:43:41,486 --> 00:43:45,236
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
766
00:43:47,601 --> 00:43:51,518
It's beautiful, I
actually need one of those.
767
00:43:52,593 --> 00:43:54,593
My sentiments exactly.
768
00:43:57,079 --> 00:43:59,996
Evil must be erased from the world.
769
00:44:05,636 --> 00:44:07,825
Happy birthday, Julian.
770
00:44:07,827 --> 00:44:11,994
(SHRIEKING)
(BOLD INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
771
00:44:12,693 --> 00:44:13,804
(YELLING)
772
00:44:13,806 --> 00:44:16,086
You're not here to
celebrate my birthday!
773
00:44:16,088 --> 00:44:18,233
That's right you arrogant prick.
774
00:44:18,235 --> 00:44:19,066
Dad!
775
00:44:19,068 --> 00:44:20,169
FATHER: Yes, son.
776
00:44:20,171 --> 00:44:21,842
You're right, Dad!
777
00:44:21,844 --> 00:44:23,615
They hate me!
778
00:44:23,617 --> 00:44:24,450
But why?
779
00:44:26,905 --> 00:44:28,513
FATHER: They're
envious of your success,
780
00:44:28,515 --> 00:44:30,963
and they think that they're punishing you.
781
00:44:30,965 --> 00:44:34,610
They believe that they
are teaching you a lesson.
782
00:44:34,612 --> 00:44:36,250
Idiots.
783
00:44:36,252 --> 00:44:37,919
Let them have their fun.
784
00:44:37,921 --> 00:44:39,884
Take your medicine.
785
00:44:39,886 --> 00:44:40,719
Even...
786
00:44:41,944 --> 00:44:42,777
Apologize.
787
00:44:44,227 --> 00:44:47,477
When this all blows over, destroy them.
788
00:44:48,531 --> 00:44:49,364
Wake up!
789
00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:51,641
Feel our hate.
790
00:44:51,643 --> 00:44:55,051
I lied for you in front of Congress.
791
00:44:55,053 --> 00:44:56,794
You all kept your jobs!
792
00:44:56,796 --> 00:44:57,694
Parties!
793
00:44:57,696 --> 00:44:59,313
Endless amounts of booze!
794
00:44:59,315 --> 00:45:01,487
Right here in this very room!
795
00:45:01,489 --> 00:45:02,489
Apologize.
796
00:45:06,670 --> 00:45:07,670
I'm sorry!
797
00:45:09,730 --> 00:45:10,980
I'm not Hitler!
798
00:45:13,737 --> 00:45:15,942
(EERIE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Help me, help me!
799
00:45:15,944 --> 00:45:19,172
Why? Because of the 20
tipless years of serving you?
800
00:45:19,174 --> 00:45:21,424
Paybacks a bitch, isn't it?
801
00:45:24,608 --> 00:45:27,811
(VACUUM MOTOR HUMMING)
802
00:45:27,813 --> 00:45:30,158
(EERIE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
803
00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:32,327
(YELLING)
804
00:45:35,736 --> 00:45:39,903
(EERIE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(YELLING)
805
00:45:40,383 --> 00:45:42,550
(RINGING)
806
00:45:45,282 --> 00:45:47,167
What is it, Christine?
807
00:45:47,169 --> 00:45:48,002
What?
808
00:45:51,551 --> 00:45:52,384
Mary!
809
00:45:55,252 --> 00:45:56,083
MARY: Food?
810
00:45:56,085 --> 00:45:57,324
Sure.
811
00:45:57,326 --> 00:45:58,793
Oh, no, please continue, it's not like
812
00:45:58,795 --> 00:46:01,818
we're in the middle of something here!
813
00:46:01,820 --> 00:46:02,835
Shut if off!
814
00:46:02,837 --> 00:46:04,992
(SLAPPING)
815
00:46:04,994 --> 00:46:08,744
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
816
00:46:13,439 --> 00:46:17,451
Do you want your daughter to be a witness?
817
00:46:17,453 --> 00:46:18,726
Get whatever you want.
818
00:46:18,728 --> 00:46:20,420
I've gotta go.
819
00:46:20,422 --> 00:46:21,589
Yes, I'm okay.
820
00:46:23,403 --> 00:46:24,236
I fell.
821
00:46:26,313 --> 00:46:30,480
Because I was distracted
by your stupid phone call!
822
00:46:33,136 --> 00:46:37,303
(CLICKING)
(GASPING)
823
00:46:44,777 --> 00:46:45,694
Find him.
824
00:46:47,850 --> 00:46:51,600
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
825
00:47:50,817 --> 00:47:54,317
(SOFT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
826
00:48:16,047 --> 00:48:17,908
(LEERY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
827
00:48:17,910 --> 00:48:20,160
(LAUGHING)
828
00:48:22,971 --> 00:48:24,009
I got him!
829
00:48:24,011 --> 00:48:26,273
I got the lesson douchebag!
830
00:48:26,275 --> 00:48:29,024
(SHRIEKING)
831
00:48:29,026 --> 00:48:30,038
Really, bro?
832
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:32,142
- You're both white, man.
- Can you pull it out, please?
833
00:48:32,144 --> 00:48:33,727
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
834
00:48:34,831 --> 00:48:37,688
(YELLING)
835
00:48:37,690 --> 00:48:41,607
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
836
00:48:44,017 --> 00:48:46,752
(GROWLING)
837
00:48:46,754 --> 00:48:48,821
Even you hate me, Brutus!
838
00:48:48,823 --> 00:48:51,073
(GROWLING)
839
00:48:57,387 --> 00:48:58,220
Help me!
840
00:49:01,571 --> 00:49:02,404
Help me!
841
00:49:03,307 --> 00:49:07,224
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
842
00:49:08,404 --> 00:49:10,654
(KNOCKING)
843
00:49:11,962 --> 00:49:13,208
Help me!
844
00:49:13,210 --> 00:49:14,460
What's wrong?
845
00:49:16,983 --> 00:49:18,120
I dont know you.
846
00:49:18,122 --> 00:49:20,162
Stay away from me.
847
00:49:20,164 --> 00:49:20,995
Oh, okay.
848
00:49:20,997 --> 00:49:22,927
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
849
00:49:22,929 --> 00:49:25,551
I'm backing off, alright.
850
00:49:25,553 --> 00:49:27,471
They won't harm me with this girl.
851
00:49:27,473 --> 00:49:30,306
Why are you wearing that outfit?
852
00:49:31,813 --> 00:49:33,313
It's my costume.
853
00:49:34,222 --> 00:49:38,389
I know, you're an emperor,
one of those Pizza Pizza guys.
854
00:49:40,419 --> 00:49:41,752
Little Caesar...
855
00:49:42,828 --> 00:49:44,124
From Greece.
856
00:49:44,126 --> 00:49:47,524
No, no, you haven't been
studying your history.
857
00:49:47,526 --> 00:49:50,066
Caesar's not from Greece, he's from Rome.
858
00:49:50,068 --> 00:49:54,235
No you're wrong, the
man said he was Greek.
859
00:49:54,302 --> 00:49:55,691
Not the guy who served you,
860
00:49:55,693 --> 00:49:57,276
the guy on the box.
861
00:49:58,750 --> 00:49:59,583
Huh?
862
00:50:01,820 --> 00:50:03,822
Children are our future.
863
00:50:03,824 --> 00:50:05,241
It's frightening.
864
00:50:06,852 --> 00:50:08,530
Help me, I'm hurting.
865
00:50:08,532 --> 00:50:10,839
No, you're mean like everybody else.
866
00:50:10,841 --> 00:50:12,752
Don't, don't, don't,
they're tryin' to...
867
00:50:12,754 --> 00:50:13,906
I'm not gonna...
868
00:50:13,908 --> 00:50:16,325
But they're tryin' to kill...
869
00:50:17,777 --> 00:50:18,928
Look.
870
00:50:18,930 --> 00:50:20,682
Doesn't it hurt?
871
00:50:20,684 --> 00:50:21,972
Yeah.
872
00:50:21,974 --> 00:50:23,333
Please help me.
873
00:50:23,335 --> 00:50:24,168
Why?
874
00:50:25,298 --> 00:50:29,007
Because I'm in pain,
you stupid little girl!
875
00:50:29,009 --> 00:50:29,842
I mean...
876
00:50:31,880 --> 00:50:33,297
Go get some help!
877
00:50:34,862 --> 00:50:36,279
Go get some help.
878
00:50:40,952 --> 00:50:44,452
(BOLD INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
879
00:51:08,633 --> 00:51:10,883
(GRUNTING)
880
00:51:14,741 --> 00:51:17,475
Let that be a lesson to you, Julian.
881
00:51:17,477 --> 00:51:18,894
Karma is a bitch.
882
00:51:19,787 --> 00:51:23,537
(PENSIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
883
00:52:04,420 --> 00:52:08,213
FATHER: He has to
learn sooner or later.
884
00:52:08,215 --> 00:52:11,345
If you want this, Julian,
you have to take it.
885
00:52:11,347 --> 00:52:14,726
Don't let anyone get in your way.
886
00:52:14,728 --> 00:52:17,952
I know, after I get this
money, connections, and power,
887
00:52:17,954 --> 00:52:20,446
I'll find some of those
faith, hope, and love stuff
888
00:52:20,448 --> 00:52:22,699
that you think is important.
889
00:52:22,701 --> 00:52:26,052
FATHER: That's good thinkin', son.
890
00:52:26,054 --> 00:52:28,412
Don't worry, Mom, there's
plenty of time in the world
891
00:52:28,414 --> 00:52:31,401
to find some of those touchy
felly things you like,
892
00:52:31,403 --> 00:52:32,632
right Dad?
893
00:52:32,634 --> 00:52:34,508
FATHER: All the time in the world.
894
00:52:34,510 --> 00:52:36,213
Now, come along, we
have a meeting to get to
895
00:52:36,215 --> 00:52:38,898
that cannot start without the chairman.
896
00:52:38,900 --> 00:52:42,962
Remember, son, the
greatest of these is power.
897
00:52:42,964 --> 00:52:47,047
(SENTIMENTAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
898
00:52:54,294 --> 00:52:58,127
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
899
00:53:05,785 --> 00:53:08,207
It ends here, Julian.
900
00:53:08,209 --> 00:53:12,042
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
901
00:53:20,043 --> 00:53:22,293
(CLAPPING)
902
00:53:26,663 --> 00:53:29,364
FATHER: You've learned
everything that I've taught you.
903
00:53:29,366 --> 00:53:33,533
I'm very proud of you, son.
(CLAPPING)
904
00:53:34,236 --> 00:53:37,486
Thanks, Dad.
(CLAPPING)
905
00:53:37,488 --> 00:53:41,321
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
906
00:53:52,906 --> 00:53:55,906
(SOFT CHORAL MUSIC)
907
00:53:57,214 --> 00:53:59,815
He looks dead to me.
908
00:53:59,817 --> 00:54:02,817
(SOFT CHORAL MUSIC)
909
00:54:06,708 --> 00:54:10,015
Great idea for a party, Sid.
910
00:54:10,017 --> 00:54:11,684
It wasn't my idea.
911
00:54:13,780 --> 00:54:16,522
Then who sent the invitations?
912
00:54:16,524 --> 00:54:18,191
I thought you did.
913
00:54:21,393 --> 00:54:24,643
(MID-TEMPO ROCK MUSIC)
914
00:54:41,607 --> 00:54:45,107
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
915
00:55:05,429 --> 00:55:06,758
Out!
916
00:55:06,760 --> 00:55:10,677
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
917
00:55:15,277 --> 00:55:16,600
Fault!
918
00:55:16,602 --> 00:55:20,519
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
919
00:55:22,242 --> 00:55:23,963
Double-fault.
920
00:55:23,965 --> 00:55:24,798
Huh!
921
00:55:25,769 --> 00:55:27,338
Dad, that didn't look out.
922
00:55:27,340 --> 00:55:29,673
Are you callin' me a liar?
923
00:55:30,592 --> 00:55:34,509
(MID-TEMPO INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
924
00:55:38,857 --> 00:55:40,607
I'm done with this.
925
00:55:41,572 --> 00:55:45,739
Quitting? Then you're the
loser and I'm the winner again.
926
00:55:45,939 --> 00:55:48,398
How am I supposed to win
against someone who cheats?
927
00:55:48,400 --> 00:55:49,733
Figure it out!
928
00:55:54,527 --> 00:55:55,855
Out.
929
00:55:55,857 --> 00:55:57,357
The hell it was!
930
00:56:02,300 --> 00:56:05,133
I meant, I'm done with the bank.
931
00:56:06,689 --> 00:56:08,356
Is that one out too?
932
00:56:15,249 --> 00:56:18,956
If I win this point, you
take over when I retire.
933
00:56:18,958 --> 00:56:21,868
If I win, I leave the bank,
934
00:56:21,870 --> 00:56:23,953
but I keep my trust fund.
935
00:56:42,280 --> 00:56:45,280
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
936
00:57:00,232 --> 00:57:03,732
So, what will you do as a worthless bum?
937
00:57:05,528 --> 00:57:07,326
Settle down.
938
00:57:07,328 --> 00:57:09,281
Live a normal life.
939
00:57:09,283 --> 00:57:11,253
Ha! Girls hate you now with money.
940
00:57:11,255 --> 00:57:14,246
You think they'll like you
more when you're broke?
941
00:57:14,248 --> 00:57:18,415
(SCOFFING)
Don't lie to a liar.
942
00:57:18,706 --> 00:57:20,523
I dont know, travel and see the world.
943
00:57:20,525 --> 00:57:21,487
You hate the world.
944
00:57:21,489 --> 00:57:22,965
Too full of foreigners.
945
00:57:22,967 --> 00:57:24,980
Face it, you're a Hassole.
946
00:57:24,982 --> 00:57:27,736
Five generations of rich inbred pricks.
947
00:57:27,738 --> 00:57:29,960
I don't wanna lie, cheat,
steal, and screw people over.
948
00:57:29,962 --> 00:57:31,755
Then you'll be the one
cheated, stolen from,
949
00:57:31,757 --> 00:57:35,424
lied to, and screwed
over by those in power.
950
00:57:39,265 --> 00:57:41,035
No!
(WEIGHTY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
951
00:57:41,037 --> 00:57:42,854
Remember what I taught you.
952
00:57:42,856 --> 00:57:45,023
Money, connections, power!
953
00:57:46,547 --> 00:57:47,925
(SHRIEKING)
954
00:57:47,927 --> 00:57:50,936
8 AM, Monday morning, got it?
955
00:57:50,938 --> 00:57:52,110
(YELLING)
956
00:57:52,112 --> 00:57:54,324
(SOBBING)
Got it?
957
00:57:54,326 --> 00:57:56,409
Got it! Got it! Got it!
958
00:57:57,374 --> 00:58:01,541
(SOBBING)
(WEIGHTY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
959
00:58:13,190 --> 00:58:17,357
- Julian, do you need...
- I don't need anybody's help.
960
00:58:21,424 --> 00:58:23,944
I don't need anybody's help.
961
00:58:23,946 --> 00:58:27,981
(WEIGHTY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
962
00:58:27,983 --> 00:58:31,829
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
963
00:58:31,831 --> 00:58:35,998
Well, Gaius, your last
wish has been fulfilled.
964
00:58:36,504 --> 00:58:40,250
You've given our son the one
thing he always wanted...
965
00:58:40,252 --> 00:58:41,669
A birthday party.
966
00:58:42,513 --> 00:58:44,846
Now you may rest peacefully.
967
00:58:48,996 --> 00:58:51,829
Extras, of your party invitations.
968
00:58:52,738 --> 00:58:54,870
Your writing was beautiful.
969
00:58:54,872 --> 00:58:56,705
Up until the very end.
970
00:59:00,689 --> 00:59:03,856
Oh, tell Julian happy birthday for me.
971
00:59:05,538 --> 00:59:08,621
(BOLD TRUMPET MUSIC)
972
00:59:53,119 --> 00:59:57,202
(SENTIMENTAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
973
01:00:31,688 --> 01:00:33,473
- Does it hurt?
- Yes!
974
01:00:33,475 --> 01:00:36,055
You know, I told you not
to call me at the party.
975
01:00:36,057 --> 01:00:39,392
It's your fault I fell and hurt myself.
976
01:00:39,394 --> 01:00:40,569
Don't you have to work today?
977
01:00:40,571 --> 01:00:41,525
No.
978
01:00:41,527 --> 01:00:43,777
My boss has gone missing.
979
01:00:45,921 --> 01:00:48,021
You don't seem too upset about it.
980
01:00:48,023 --> 01:00:52,079
Well, you know, it's just
it may take a little while,
981
01:00:52,081 --> 01:00:55,831
but people usually get
what's coming to them.
982
01:00:55,833 --> 01:00:57,207
Like the Bible says.
983
01:00:57,209 --> 01:00:59,937
- An eye for an eye.
- Exactly.
984
01:00:59,939 --> 01:01:01,606
So, to be hated...
985
01:01:03,865 --> 01:01:05,282
Or even murdered,
986
01:01:06,946 --> 01:01:09,333
if that's what happens,
987
01:01:09,335 --> 01:01:11,575
he must've done some pretty bad things.
988
01:01:11,577 --> 01:01:13,244
Yeah, he sure did.
989
01:01:14,497 --> 01:01:15,548
Did he kill somebody?
990
01:01:15,550 --> 01:01:17,944
- Oh, heavens no.
- Did he steal from you?
991
01:01:17,946 --> 01:01:19,389
No.
992
01:01:19,391 --> 01:01:21,061
Well, unless you count
the times he docked me
993
01:01:21,063 --> 01:01:23,148
an hour's pay for being late
994
01:01:23,150 --> 01:01:27,233
because you were afraid
of the little dog, Missy.
995
01:01:29,227 --> 01:01:30,644
I'm sorry, Mom.
996
01:01:33,356 --> 01:01:34,816
Did he break a law?
997
01:01:34,818 --> 01:01:37,549
Look, he bent many laws.
998
01:01:37,551 --> 01:01:38,384
Cheat?
999
01:01:39,585 --> 01:01:40,416
Maybe.
1000
01:01:40,418 --> 01:01:41,421
CHRISTINE: Lie.
1001
01:01:41,423 --> 01:01:42,256
I guess.
1002
01:01:43,162 --> 01:01:46,717
Then why are you so happy he's dead?
1003
01:01:46,719 --> 01:01:49,136
Because he was really mean!
1004
01:01:52,477 --> 01:01:54,729
Where are the bags?
1005
01:01:54,731 --> 01:01:56,290
Go and get 'em!
1006
01:01:56,292 --> 01:01:59,625
You don't have to be so mean about it!
1007
01:02:01,029 --> 01:02:04,529
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
1008
01:02:11,421 --> 01:02:13,524
(EVIL LAUGHING)
1009
01:02:13,526 --> 01:02:16,972
You made me late because
of that dog, Missy.
1010
01:02:16,974 --> 01:02:19,358
(YELLING)
(GROWLING)
1011
01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:21,662
Julian was a terrible boss.
1012
01:02:21,664 --> 01:02:23,247
He was really mean.
1013
01:02:24,227 --> 01:02:26,560
Let that be a lesson to you.
1014
01:02:27,824 --> 01:02:29,157
Karma's a bitch.
1015
01:02:30,643 --> 01:02:33,310
(EVIL LAUGHING)
1016
01:02:36,186 --> 01:02:38,769
People go missing all the time.
1017
01:02:39,740 --> 01:02:43,323
(EERIE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
1018
01:02:46,544 --> 01:02:49,461
Yeah, I don't feel too good, Mom.
1019
01:02:54,613 --> 01:02:56,196
You do feel warm.
1020
01:03:02,773 --> 01:03:06,022
Well, you better get to work.
1021
01:03:06,024 --> 01:03:08,431
You don't wanna be docked
another hour's pay.
1022
01:03:08,433 --> 01:03:10,933
No, I won't, Sid wouldn't...
1023
01:03:14,626 --> 01:03:18,459
You know, you're right,
Julian might be there.
1024
01:03:19,476 --> 01:03:21,577
But I don't wanna leave you alone.
1025
01:03:21,579 --> 01:03:24,830
Well, maybe at work I
can swing by in an hour
1026
01:03:24,832 --> 01:03:26,369
if I'm feeling better by then
1027
01:03:26,371 --> 01:03:29,189
so you can take me to school.
1028
01:03:29,191 --> 01:03:30,173
You sure?
1029
01:03:30,175 --> 01:03:33,151
Mom, I'll be right here...
1030
01:03:33,153 --> 01:03:33,986
Resting.
1031
01:03:34,924 --> 01:03:35,757
Okay.
1032
01:03:40,023 --> 01:03:42,190
I'm sorry about yesterday.
1033
01:03:47,418 --> 01:03:50,918
You know what you said about being mean?
1034
01:03:51,816 --> 01:03:54,149
I understand your boss is...
1035
01:03:56,887 --> 01:03:57,887
Or was mean.
1036
01:04:02,561 --> 01:04:06,644
But it rubs off, and it'll
get better now, right?
1037
01:04:09,110 --> 01:04:10,110
I hope so.
1038
01:04:26,519 --> 01:04:30,269
(WEIGHTY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
1039
01:04:51,969 --> 01:04:54,302
(VIBRATING)
1040
01:04:55,420 --> 01:04:56,713
Sid.
1041
01:04:56,715 --> 01:05:00,448
Probably telling us to take the day off.
1042
01:05:00,450 --> 01:05:02,775
"Until Mr. Hassole is found,
1043
01:05:02,777 --> 01:05:05,730
"HR and I think it's best to
keep his policies in place.
1044
01:05:05,732 --> 01:05:09,827
"Arrive by 8:30 or be docked
one hour's pay, chop chop."
1045
01:05:09,829 --> 01:05:10,662
Crap!
1046
01:05:22,520 --> 01:05:24,853
(WHISTLING)
1047
01:05:31,164 --> 01:05:33,581
(WHIMPERING)
1048
01:05:48,647 --> 01:05:51,483
Let that be a lesson to you, Mother.
1049
01:05:51,485 --> 01:05:52,902
Paybacks a bitch.
1050
01:05:58,514 --> 01:06:00,014
It certainly is.
1051
01:06:03,465 --> 01:06:06,550
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
1052
01:06:06,552 --> 01:06:07,801
I'm just goin' for a little stroll.
1053
01:06:07,803 --> 01:06:08,757
I'll be home soon.
1054
01:06:08,759 --> 01:06:10,362
The weather's been gorgeous.
1055
01:06:10,364 --> 01:06:12,714
What do you know, Dad, your ball girl.
1056
01:06:12,716 --> 01:06:15,825
- Milania.
- Still smokin' hot.
1057
01:06:15,827 --> 01:06:19,210
Damn right.
(CHUCKLES)
1058
01:06:19,212 --> 01:06:20,628
The weather's been gorgeous,
1059
01:06:20,630 --> 01:06:23,792
and just gonna go for a little stroll.
1060
01:06:23,794 --> 01:06:25,500
(LAUGHS)
1061
01:06:25,502 --> 01:06:28,085
Somebody just grabbed my pussy.
1062
01:06:29,110 --> 01:06:32,510
No, I don't know if he was cute.
1063
01:06:32,512 --> 01:06:34,262
No, I didn't like it.
1064
01:06:38,473 --> 01:06:39,973
President Asshole?
1065
01:06:44,059 --> 01:06:46,256
President Hassle?
1066
01:06:46,258 --> 01:06:47,091
Hassole!
1067
01:06:48,006 --> 01:06:51,673
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
1068
01:07:04,953 --> 01:07:07,870
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
1069
01:07:35,863 --> 01:07:40,863
Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
1070
01:09:07,702 --> 01:09:11,285
(ENERGETIC POP ROCK MUSIC)
72717
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