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00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:04,003
[ Whirring ]
2
00:00:04,070 --> 00:00:06,039
[ Theme music plays ]
3
00:00:08,541 --> 00:00:10,477
[ Whirring ]
4
00:00:10,543 --> 00:00:17,316
♪♪
5
00:00:17,383 --> 00:00:18,752
Man: It's alive!
6
00:00:18,819 --> 00:00:25,819
♪♪
7
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:27,928
[ Thunder rumbles ]
8
00:00:27,994 --> 00:00:34,994
♪♪
9
00:00:37,403 --> 00:00:39,372
[ Giggles ]
You do it!
10
00:00:39,438 --> 00:00:40,873
No, you do it!
11
00:00:40,940 --> 00:00:43,076
Okay, okay, shh.
12
00:00:43,143 --> 00:00:45,645
Oh, my God! [ Laughs ]
Oh, my God!
13
00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:47,748
We are so bad!
14
00:00:48,181 --> 00:00:49,282
♪♪
15
00:00:49,349 --> 00:00:52,285
[ Squeaky video game-style
speech ]
16
00:00:52,351 --> 00:00:59,351
♪♪
17
00:01:00,327 --> 00:01:07,327
♪♪
18
00:01:08,302 --> 00:01:11,171
♪♪
19
00:01:11,238 --> 00:01:17,110
♪♪
20
00:01:17,177 --> 00:01:23,049
♪♪
21
00:01:23,116 --> 00:01:25,886
[ Whirring ]
22
00:01:25,953 --> 00:01:27,754
[ Warble! ]
23
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:29,189
[ Zap! ]
24
00:01:29,255 --> 00:01:30,958
[ Whoosh! ]
25
00:01:32,225 --> 00:01:34,394
Announcer: Three, two, one...
26
00:01:34,461 --> 00:01:35,762
Go!
27
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:42,829
♪♪
28
00:01:44,370 --> 00:01:46,973
Eat my hot Italian sausage!
29
00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:49,476
-[ Roars ]
-Now that's a spicy burn!
30
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,443
[ Warble! ]
31
00:01:51,510 --> 00:01:54,381
What the fuck
are we doing here?
32
00:01:58,218 --> 00:02:00,087
-Get her!
-It's not fair!
33
00:02:02,355 --> 00:02:04,324
[ Indistinct shouting ]
34
00:02:04,391 --> 00:02:07,227
[ Tires screech ]
-Wah! Hop on kid!
35
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,096
[ Engine revs ]
36
00:02:10,463 --> 00:02:13,834
Don't thank Wario yet!
Wah!
37
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:19,639
Daniel,
meet King Friday's niece.
38
00:02:19,706 --> 00:02:21,741
I'm Tina,
and I'm 6 years old.
39
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,409
Tina, if you're my age,
40
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:26,179
why do you look like
a grown-up woman lady?
41
00:02:26,246 --> 00:02:27,847
I started developing
when I was 4.
42
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:29,348
Well,
that's how old I am.
43
00:02:29,415 --> 00:02:31,484
How come I don't
have lady balloons?
44
00:02:31,551 --> 00:02:33,753
Well, Daniel, Tina has
something called
45
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,554
precocious puberty.
46
00:02:35,621 --> 00:02:38,657
♪ Everybody's gonna grow,
that's a fact that we all know ♪
47
00:02:38,724 --> 00:02:41,460
♪ There's no shame in letting
nature have its way ♪
48
00:02:41,527 --> 00:02:42,962
♪ Hormones in us
cause these surges ♪
49
00:02:43,029 --> 00:02:44,363
♪ We get pubes, we get urges
50
00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:47,200
♪ And it's beautiful,
no matter what they say ♪
51
00:02:47,267 --> 00:02:48,601
♪ Most are changing 'round 13
52
00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:49,902
♪ That's the average
and the mean ♪
53
00:02:49,969 --> 00:02:52,804
♪ Unless you've got
precocious puberty ♪
54
00:02:52,871 --> 00:02:54,874
Okay but --
♪ Could be hormones
in our food ♪
55
00:02:54,941 --> 00:02:56,242
♪ Could be nature being rude
56
00:02:56,309 --> 00:02:59,078
♪ No one knows what
causes this calamity ♪
57
00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:02,015
♪ Yes, Tina's got
precocious puberty ♪
58
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:03,348
♪ Boys and girls as young as 4
59
00:03:03,415 --> 00:03:04,384
♪ Growing breasts
and shaggy floors ♪ --
60
00:03:04,451 --> 00:03:05,685
Got it dude.
61
00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:09,455
Am I gonna get
"precosis prububerty"?
62
00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:11,523
Well, it's very rare
in tigers, son.
63
00:03:11,590 --> 00:03:14,426
Wait, aren't tigers usually
fully grown at Daniel's age?
64
00:03:14,493 --> 00:03:17,229
Yes, that's true,
but Daniel's got...
65
00:03:17,296 --> 00:03:20,066
♪ Dwarfism, dwarfism
66
00:03:20,133 --> 00:03:21,568
Wha...
67
00:03:22,001 --> 00:03:24,170
The new iPhone is better
than ever and available now
68
00:03:24,237 --> 00:03:25,972
on the America's
largest digital network.
69
00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:27,172
Bitch Puddin': Damn!
[ Record scratches ]
70
00:03:27,239 --> 00:03:29,309
Who put a blue shirt
on a big pile of shit?
71
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:31,410
Oh, no,
that's just Lily.
72
00:03:31,477 --> 00:03:33,446
Um, who are you?
73
00:03:33,513 --> 00:03:35,080
Didn't I
introduce myself?
74
00:03:35,147 --> 00:03:38,484
Mother fucking Bitch mother
fucking Puddin', y'all!
75
00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:39,618
[ Farts ]
76
00:03:39,685 --> 00:03:42,088
Oh, my gosh.
Please leave the store.
77
00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:43,790
Fuck nah
cum chugger.
78
00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:45,658
Let me explain this shiz.
79
00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:48,227
"Robot Chicken"
is owned by Adult Swim,
80
00:03:48,294 --> 00:03:49,996
which is owned by Time Warner,
81
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,497
which is now owned by,
82
00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:54,067
dun-da-na-na,
your company.
83
00:03:54,134 --> 00:03:56,069
Which makes you and me
co-workers cum face.
84
00:03:56,136 --> 00:03:57,503
Blam!
85
00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:59,638
If that's true, you're making
a terrible first impression
86
00:03:59,705 --> 00:04:01,174
on the people
who sign your paychecks.
87
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:02,709
I never thought about it
that way.
88
00:04:02,776 --> 00:04:05,178
You're right cum face.
89
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,980
-Now, with our new data plan --
-Blam!
90
00:04:08,047 --> 00:04:09,950
I never learn shit! Ho.
91
00:04:10,516 --> 00:04:12,918
It's my job
to freeze you.
92
00:04:12,985 --> 00:04:14,287
Okay, that's your job,
93
00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:16,389
but what's your passion?
94
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:18,291
To dance!
95
00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:21,528
[ Laughs ]
96
00:04:22,127 --> 00:04:24,630
Paul and Sarah, ready to go
inside the video game
97
00:04:24,697 --> 00:04:26,465
and battle Zomax
in the wizard level?
98
00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:30,437
Inside the video game?
The technology does exist!
99
00:04:30,504 --> 00:04:31,938
[ Laughs ]
100
00:04:32,005 --> 00:04:33,406
Hands on buzzers.
101
00:04:33,473 --> 00:04:34,406
What was the video game
that --
102
00:04:34,473 --> 00:04:35,508
Yoshi's Island.
[ Ding! ]
103
00:04:35,575 --> 00:04:36,610
This early Atari --
104
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:37,644
Pong.
[ Ding! ]
105
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:38,911
She was the titular
character --
106
00:04:38,978 --> 00:04:40,045
Mayim Bialik.
[ Ding! ]
107
00:04:40,112 --> 00:04:41,514
He's not even letting me
hear the questions.
108
00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:43,882
Good Burger. Alf.
The Challenger explosion.
109
00:04:43,949 --> 00:04:45,584
Fuck this.
-You know what that means.
110
00:04:45,651 --> 00:04:48,989
Red Team, you're going
into the video game!
111
00:04:49,056 --> 00:04:50,956
Oh fuck yes! I win!
112
00:04:51,023 --> 00:04:53,293
What the hell is this?
113
00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:55,628
Digitize me.
I want to meet Sonic!
114
00:04:55,695 --> 00:04:57,529
Uh-oh,
here come the snakes!
115
00:04:57,596 --> 00:05:00,266
Uh, what snakes?
This is just a green room.
116
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:01,667
Fireballs! Watch out!
117
00:05:01,734 --> 00:05:04,537
What?
There's no f-- Ow! Ow!
118
00:05:04,604 --> 00:05:06,206
Ow!
Why is this like this?
119
00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:07,473
Time's almost up.
120
00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:09,942
Better climb up that ladder
and vanquish Zomax.
121
00:05:10,009 --> 00:05:11,945
Hey, Zomax.
You're going down!
122
00:05:12,012 --> 00:05:13,346
Push him
off that platform!
123
00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:15,815
Uh, no.
124
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:17,383
Destroy Zomax and win!
125
00:05:17,450 --> 00:05:18,585
[ Laughs ]
126
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:19,819
I don't want --
I don't want to --
127
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,687
Okay, I'm sorry!
128
00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:25,492
[ Hoots ]
129
00:05:25,559 --> 00:05:32,197
♪♪
130
00:05:32,264 --> 00:05:34,634
You won a free dinner
at Ponderosa Steakhouse!
131
00:05:34,701 --> 00:05:36,102
-Wow!
-No sides.
132
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,137
Aw.
133
00:05:37,570 --> 00:05:39,772
Madame, have no fear.
134
00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:42,576
I shall solve
your husband's murder.
135
00:05:44,043 --> 00:05:45,578
I think I figured it out.
136
00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:47,881
'Twas a sex game gone wrong!
137
00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:49,482
[ Dramatic sting plays ]
138
00:05:49,549 --> 00:05:51,584
Yeah! Don't tell my wife.
139
00:05:51,651 --> 00:05:53,319
Choke me, baby!
Harder.
140
00:05:53,386 --> 00:05:55,755
Yeah!
Let's get dangerous!
141
00:05:55,822 --> 00:05:56,956
Ha-ha!
142
00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:58,725
Careful, baby,
one wrong move and --
143
00:05:58,792 --> 00:06:04,230
♪♪
144
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:05,498
Elementary, my dear.
145
00:06:05,565 --> 00:06:06,966
Thank you, kind sir.
146
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:08,533
Now I know the truth,
147
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:12,104
but I'm afraid I have no money
to pay you for your services.
148
00:06:12,171 --> 00:06:14,473
Well, I'm sure
we can work something out.
149
00:06:14,540 --> 00:06:16,108
Yes, yes,
oh, just like that.
150
00:06:16,175 --> 00:06:17,577
Oh, the danger
makes it so --
151
00:06:17,644 --> 00:06:19,245
Eh, yeah, okay.
152
00:06:19,679 --> 00:06:22,081
♪ Harp seal with a harpsichord
153
00:06:22,148 --> 00:06:24,483
♪ It's a Harp seal
with a harpsichord ♪
154
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:28,688
♪ It's a Harp seal
with a harpsichord ♪
155
00:06:29,121 --> 00:06:31,857
Announcer: Karen wanted to
grow up a little too fast.
156
00:06:31,924 --> 00:06:34,126
I hate being 13!
157
00:06:34,193 --> 00:06:37,130
Announcer: Until she wished on
an old Civil War coin...
158
00:06:37,197 --> 00:06:39,266
Let me be a grown-up already.
159
00:06:40,366 --> 00:06:42,535
Announcer: ...And woke up
30 years later.
160
00:06:42,602 --> 00:06:44,770
Oh, my God. I have boobs.
I have a house.
161
00:06:44,837 --> 00:06:46,505
I have a bestie!
162
00:06:46,572 --> 00:06:48,340
Mom, I'm gonna be
late for school!
163
00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:50,109
Announcer:
But she's about to find out
164
00:06:50,176 --> 00:06:52,745
life as a grown-up isn't
all it's cracked up to be...
165
00:06:52,812 --> 00:06:54,580
I miss being a kid.
166
00:06:54,647 --> 00:06:56,682
Announcer: ...and get a second
chance to be young.
167
00:06:56,749 --> 00:06:59,051
You have no idea
what it's like to be a kid!
168
00:06:59,118 --> 00:07:00,820
That's all I know,
you idiot!
169
00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:02,689
I'd give anything
to be your age again.
170
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,656
[ Sparkle! ]
171
00:07:04,723 --> 00:07:06,792
But what if the thing
you really wanted...
172
00:07:06,859 --> 00:07:09,962
[ Both groaning ]
173
00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:12,498
...was the thing you got the
first time you made a wish...
174
00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:15,567
Oh, hell yes!
I'm in my daughter's body.
175
00:07:15,634 --> 00:07:17,570
Announcer: ...And then traded it
away with your second wish...
176
00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:20,906
I just woke up spooned
by Dad's half-chub!
177
00:07:20,973 --> 00:07:23,009
Give me back my body,
you succubus bitch!
178
00:07:23,076 --> 00:07:25,844
Go to hell, cutter.
I'm gonna live forever!
179
00:07:25,911 --> 00:07:28,547
...But wished for again
the third time around, and --
180
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:31,518
Holy shit!
This is fucking confusing, guys.
181
00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:33,786
Karen: I wish I were big
182
00:07:33,853 --> 00:07:36,790
enough to beat up
my dickhead goth daughter.
183
00:07:40,093 --> 00:07:43,330
What am I?
184
00:07:45,931 --> 00:07:48,167
Announcer: From the network
that brought you "The Wiz Live"
185
00:07:48,234 --> 00:07:50,636
and something vaguely
resembling "Peter Pan"
186
00:07:50,703 --> 00:07:53,773
comes another live
Broadway on TV experience.
187
00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:56,475
Yes, it's the sights,
sounds, and smells of
188
00:07:56,542 --> 00:08:00,079
Andrew Lloyd Webber's "Cats"
in your home!
189
00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,147
On broadcast night,
thousands of performers
190
00:08:02,214 --> 00:08:04,183
will be disbursed
through the sewers,
191
00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:07,621
climb up through your pipes,
and into your hearts!
192
00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:10,256
♪ It's midnight
193
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:14,094
♪ I am dying at midnight
194
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,495
♪ I'm old Deuteronomy
195
00:08:16,562 --> 00:08:19,532
♪ I dump with econom--
Oh, God, my eyes!
196
00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:22,135
♪ I'm the Rum Tum Tugger,
what you think about ♪ --
197
00:08:22,202 --> 00:08:23,269
Ah!
198
00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:24,536
Good news and bad news.
199
00:08:24,603 --> 00:08:27,006
"Cats Live" got the biggest
ratings in history,
200
00:08:27,073 --> 00:08:29,075
however,
we've got over 273,000
201
00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:30,910
dead and maimed
"Cats" performers.
202
00:08:30,977 --> 00:08:33,714
That's almost everyone who's
ever performed in that musical.
203
00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:36,650
What's the bad news?
204
00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:42,455
My hedges!
205
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:45,726
Shoo! Shoo!
You get away from my hedges!
206
00:08:46,159 --> 00:08:48,827
♪♪
207
00:08:48,894 --> 00:08:51,530
Sorry, guys.
I'm just not feeling it today.
208
00:08:51,597 --> 00:08:52,831
Wow, Jabberjaw.
209
00:08:52,898 --> 00:08:55,267
Maybe all our late-night gigs
are getting to you.
210
00:08:55,334 --> 00:08:57,336
What you need
is a vacation.
211
00:08:57,403 --> 00:09:00,640
But what about the band?
We got gigs!
212
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:02,107
Don't worry, buddy.
213
00:09:02,174 --> 00:09:05,411
Take a few days,
find a nice resort, and chill.
214
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:06,746
You aren't using this
as an excuse
215
00:09:06,813 --> 00:09:08,381
to find another drummer,
are you?
216
00:09:08,447 --> 00:09:13,886
[ Laughter ]
217
00:09:13,953 --> 00:09:17,356
Oh, boy!
Relaxation, here I come!
218
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:18,424
Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.
219
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,093
Hey, friend, can you tell me --
220
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,961
Hey! Not even a sharkly hello?
221
00:09:22,027 --> 00:09:23,931
No respect, no respect at all!
222
00:09:24,764 --> 00:09:27,833
Ooh, free chum!
Don't mind if I do.
223
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:29,803
Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.
224
00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:32,237
Hello. A go-go dancer in a cage!
225
00:09:32,304 --> 00:09:34,208
Good thing I brought
plenty of singles!
226
00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:37,277
Oh, no, he's trapped!
227
00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:39,680
Never fear, Jabberjaw is here!
228
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:44,818
Not even a thank you?
229
00:09:44,884 --> 00:09:46,653
I tell you, I get no respect.
230
00:09:46,719 --> 00:09:49,489
[ Screams ]
231
00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:51,124
That's a 20-footer.
232
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:52,425
25!
233
00:09:52,491 --> 00:09:53,692
3 tons of --
234
00:09:53,759 --> 00:09:55,962
No, wait, he appears to be
15 feet at best.
235
00:09:56,029 --> 00:09:57,062
My mistake.
236
00:09:57,129 --> 00:09:59,733
Hey, what's the big idea
shooting barrels at --
237
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:00,833
Oh, no, look out!
238
00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:03,235
[ Screams ]
Shark BJ!
239
00:10:03,302 --> 00:10:06,273
[ Laughs ]
No way! I'm straight.
240
00:10:06,340 --> 00:10:07,774
Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.
241
00:10:07,841 --> 00:10:09,909
Oh, dear.
He's not moving, is he?
242
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:12,445
Ohhhhhh, yikes.
243
00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:15,248
Oh, I'll get the chair
for this for sure!
244
00:10:15,315 --> 00:10:16,417
Unless...
245
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:20,720
No witnesses!
246
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:24,225
Smile you son of a...
247
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:31,866
That shark left
a shit-ton of singles!
248
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:35,534
It's weird how Jabberjaw
never came back.
249
00:10:35,601 --> 00:10:36,736
Should we look for him?
250
00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:39,606
What? No. He was a crappy
drummer anyway.
251
00:10:39,673 --> 00:10:40,907
Count us off, Bruce!
252
00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:44,644
[ Growling ]
253
00:10:44,711 --> 00:10:48,914
♪♪
254
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:49,949
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk
255
00:10:50,016 --> 00:10:51,284
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk
256
00:10:51,351 --> 00:10:53,285
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
257
00:10:53,352 --> 00:10:54,453
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk
258
00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:55,788
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk
259
00:10:55,855 --> 00:10:57,623
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
260
00:10:57,690 --> 00:10:58,624
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk
261
00:10:58,691 --> 00:10:59,959
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk
262
00:11:00,026 --> 00:11:01,961
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
263
00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:04,131
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
18061
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