Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:05,973
[thunder crashes]
2
00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:08,809
[laughs evilly]
3
00:00:08,876 --> 00:00:10,978
[ sawing ]
4
00:00:16,083 --> 00:00:18,019
[ electricity crackles ]
5
00:00:18,085 --> 00:00:19,887
It's alive!
6
00:00:27,294 --> 00:00:28,396
[thunder crashes]
7
00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:32,400
[laughs evilly]
8
00:00:32,466 --> 00:00:34,402
[ smooch! ]
9
00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:35,870
[laughs evilly]
10
00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:39,907
Welcome back to
"America's Best Dance Crow."
11
00:00:39,974 --> 00:00:41,409
I'm Mario Crowpez.
12
00:00:41,475 --> 00:00:44,545
And now performing to
"Get Crow," by Crow Rida,
13
00:00:44,612 --> 00:00:46,614
here's Four-and-20 Blackbirds!
14
00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,050
♪ Hey! Crow hit the glass ♪
15
00:00:49,116 --> 00:00:50,518
♪ Fell hard on his ass ♪
16
00:00:50,584 --> 00:00:54,755
♪ And he got crow, crow,
crow, crow, crow ♪
17
00:00:54,822 --> 00:00:56,257
One more push, woman!
18
00:00:56,323 --> 00:00:57,691
[grunting ]
19
00:00:57,758 --> 00:00:58,592
[ Cries ]
20
00:00:58,659 --> 00:01:00,661
It is a fine son!
21
00:01:59,487 --> 00:02:01,856
♪ [soft music plays] ♪
22
00:02:09,130 --> 00:02:11,298
[suckling]
23
00:02:14,101 --> 00:02:15,769
You know,
when we were kids,
24
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:18,606
there were only 150 Pokemon.
25
00:02:18,672 --> 00:02:23,711
Actually, there were
151 Pokemon from the start.
26
00:02:23,777 --> 00:02:25,679
N-e-e-e-e-e-r-r-d!
27
00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:27,148
[gasps]
28
00:02:27,214 --> 00:02:28,215
Aah!
29
00:02:28,282 --> 00:02:32,086
Oh.
That's how he wanted to go.
30
00:02:32,153 --> 00:02:35,489
And now back to "An American
Werewolf in London."
31
00:02:35,556 --> 00:02:36,857
[camera shutter clicks]
32
00:02:36,924 --> 00:02:39,126
- [ Excited chatter]
- Frickin' foreigners!
33
00:02:39,193 --> 00:02:41,595
So, is there a McDonald's
in this country or what?
34
00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:44,899
We all just thought
he would keep going
35
00:02:44,965 --> 00:02:46,901
[sniffles]
and going and going --
36
00:02:46,967 --> 00:02:50,638
You can stop shilling, mom!
He's dead!
37
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:53,541
We had a good run, people --
four seasons of "Airwolf"!
38
00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,442
Put that on your résumés!
39
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:56,510
As "Mash."
40
00:02:56,577 --> 00:02:58,579
So, uh, what's gonna happen to
the helicopter? Air shows?
41
00:02:58,646 --> 00:03:00,648
Nobody cares about this turd
of a series, you idiot.
42
00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:01,982
We'll sell it.
43
00:03:02,049 --> 00:03:03,851
You're off to Germany,
old girl.
44
00:03:03,918 --> 00:03:06,420
You pretended to save lives
each week on TV,
45
00:03:06,487 --> 00:03:09,190
but now you'll save
lives for real --
46
00:03:09,256 --> 00:03:11,659
as an air ambulance.
47
00:03:11,725 --> 00:03:14,395
I talk and talk,
but they never answer back.
48
00:03:14,461 --> 00:03:16,463
[German accent]
Do not worry, fraulein!
49
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,333
We shall deliver you
to hospital at top speed!
50
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:21,902
This used to be
the famous Airwolf!
51
00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:25,839
For the first time,
I have hope.
52
00:03:25,906 --> 00:03:27,908
♪ [rock music plays] ♪
53
00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:31,912
Tune in next week
when we share the story
54
00:03:31,979 --> 00:03:33,781
of the "Mighty Morphin
Power Rangers" actor
55
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:35,849
who tied an elderly couple
to a yacht anchor
56
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:36,784
and drowned them.
57
00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:37,918
I was sentenced to death
58
00:03:37,985 --> 00:03:42,256
and tried to cut off my own
penis in prison.
59
00:03:42,323 --> 00:03:43,757
Hi, sad clown!
60
00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:45,392
Why are you so sad?
61
00:03:45,459 --> 00:03:47,628
My wife died!
62
00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:49,463
Uh, that wasn't
in the script.
63
00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:51,532
I know!
64
00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:54,702
[ sobbing ]
65
00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:57,605
Yeah, Johnny, get him
a body bag!
66
00:03:57,671 --> 00:03:59,473
Hey, what's up with this?
67
00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:01,542
You gonna do some special
surprise moves?
68
00:04:01,609 --> 00:04:03,611
Surprise move?
That's... crazy.
69
00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:06,213
A body bag, Johnny!
That's what you should get him!
70
00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:07,848
You're not gonna do some
insane face kick
71
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:09,450
or something,
are you?
72
00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:11,552
'Cause this gorilla thing looks
really suspicious.
73
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:13,287
It's a crane!
I mean, nothing.
74
00:04:13,354 --> 00:04:14,521
It's not anything!
75
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:16,457
Johnny! Amazon has great
deals on body bags
76
00:04:16,523 --> 00:04:18,225
if you want to get him
a body bag!
77
00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:19,793
I mean, it'd be pretty stupid
78
00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:21,328
if I just walked my face
into your foot
79
00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:23,397
after you telegraph
some big trick move.
80
00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:25,466
Okay, guys, I took some initiative
and hit up the body-bag district!
81
00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:27,101
Body bags come
in lots of colors!
82
00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:28,936
You can even get fancy leather
body bags, depending on
83
00:04:29,003 --> 00:04:30,738
what kind of body bag
you want to get him!
84
00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:32,373
I have no idea
what you're talking about.
85
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:34,241
Well... okay.
86
00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:36,310
Let's do this, then!
[ bell dings]
87
00:04:36,377 --> 00:04:38,712
- Hadouken!
- Aah!
88
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,614
I'll take...
one of those...
89
00:04:40,681 --> 00:04:42,449
body bags.
90
00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:44,985
Oh, man, this is my first
time at Coachella!
91
00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:46,854
I can't wait!
- Coachella?
92
00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:48,989
This is just
some guy's lawn, dude!
93
00:04:49,056 --> 00:04:49,990
[ motor whirring ]
94
00:04:50,057 --> 00:04:51,258
Aah!
95
00:04:51,325 --> 00:04:55,829
♪ Missamo la Cuchetta ♪
96
00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:59,566
♪ Bambino solo notte ♪
97
00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:02,036
[gasps]
Gondola-jack!
98
00:05:04,505 --> 00:05:07,074
♪ Brattzo L'amore ♪
99
00:05:07,141 --> 00:05:10,110
And now back to "An American
Werewolf in London."
100
00:05:10,177 --> 00:05:11,312
Yeah, well,
where I come from,
101
00:05:11,378 --> 00:05:12,946
any sport where
you can't use your hands
102
00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:16,417
is for pussies!
103
00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:19,186
[indistinct shouting]
104
00:05:19,253 --> 00:05:21,522
Yep. Other networks may have
"Shark Week,"
105
00:05:21,588 --> 00:05:23,590
but that's expensive and scary
106
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,993
and way too sharky
for a webcam show.
107
00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:29,463
So this week on "iCarly,"
it's "Duck Week."
108
00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:31,732
MAN:
Carly, you're gonna be late for school!
109
00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:33,767
Oh, crap.
Look at the time.
110
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:37,538
We'll be back later with more
"iCarly: Duck week."
111
00:05:37,604 --> 00:05:38,972
Bye!
112
00:05:39,039 --> 00:05:42,009
Okay, and off.
113
00:05:42,076 --> 00:05:45,512
Oh, man, I wonder what the world
record for a shower is.
114
00:05:45,579 --> 00:05:47,981
Oh, God, it's cold!
115
00:05:48,048 --> 00:05:49,550
Ooh, wow!
116
00:05:49,616 --> 00:05:52,052
I didn't know the iCarly iNipples
got that hard.
117
00:05:52,119 --> 00:05:53,954
Wow, those are some
glass cutters!
118
00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:55,756
MAN:
Carly, move it!
119
00:05:55,823 --> 00:05:58,258
Here's the "Duck Week" promo.
Hey, where's Freddie?
120
00:05:58,325 --> 00:05:59,993
He said I could do it
this time.
121
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,129
Oh, Gibby, you're so sweet.
122
00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:03,564
You're like a water balloon
123
00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:05,599
filled with high-fructose
corn syrup.
124
00:06:05,666 --> 00:06:07,201
[ laugh track plays ]
125
00:06:07,267 --> 00:06:10,237
I'm gonna get
juvenile diabetes.
126
00:06:10,304 --> 00:06:11,805
Gibby!
127
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:15,376
Time to do some uploading.
Better get comfortable.
128
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:17,878
Oh, God, it's cold!
129
00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:18,979
Ooh, wow!
130
00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:22,416
I didn't know the iCarly iNipples
got that hard.
131
00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:24,651
Colonel Shay, isn't it time
for your daughter's webcast?
132
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,120
Why, so it is.
133
00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:27,187
Thank you, ensign.
134
00:06:27,254 --> 00:06:28,455
I love Carly's show!
135
00:06:28,522 --> 00:06:30,124
It's the best part
of the week!
136
00:06:30,190 --> 00:06:31,225
Ooh, wow!
137
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:33,460
I didn't know the iCarly iNipples
got that hard.
138
00:06:33,527 --> 00:06:37,531
Wow, those are some
glass cutters!
139
00:06:37,598 --> 00:06:40,701
I've failed as a father
and as a man.
140
00:06:40,768 --> 00:06:42,770
I'm resigning my commission.
- You can't, sir.
141
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,304
They'll court-martial you.
142
00:06:44,371 --> 00:06:47,040
I might as well do something
worth court-martialing.
143
00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:49,109
Set a course
for the Arabian sea!
144
00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:52,646
Let's do what President Obama
never had the balls to do!
145
00:06:52,713 --> 00:06:54,314
[ all cheering ]
Let's do it!
146
00:06:54,381 --> 00:06:55,883
Should've voted for Ron Paul,
guys.
147
00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:57,184
Shut up, Larry!
148
00:06:57,251 --> 00:06:59,119
Wow, those are some
glass cutters!
149
00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:02,089
My life is over!
150
00:07:02,156 --> 00:07:03,624
Did you see the news?
151
00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:06,226
Carly, I think Dad
just nuked Iran!
152
00:07:06,293 --> 00:07:07,461
What?!
153
00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:09,430
Al-qaeda strike teams
will hunt us
154
00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:10,898
for the rest of our
lives!
155
00:07:10,964 --> 00:07:14,101
We gotta go off the grid!
[ sobbing ]
156
00:07:14,168 --> 00:07:15,235
Ow!
157
00:07:15,302 --> 00:07:16,970
Stop poking me
with your nipples!
158
00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:18,539
[ laugh track plays]
159
00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:19,440
[ bell dings]
160
00:07:19,506 --> 00:07:22,376
And those will be our
gingerbread muffins, folks.
161
00:07:22,443 --> 00:07:24,678
Now, if you remembered
to grease the pan --
162
00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:26,847
Yeah, Hansel and Gretel
style, bitch!
163
00:07:26,914 --> 00:07:28,715
Unh! Smack your witch ass!
164
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,451
Kapow!
Whooooo!
165
00:07:30,517 --> 00:07:33,787
Curb smashin'!
- Yeah, home invasion, girl!
166
00:07:36,490 --> 00:07:37,991
This is the big day, baby.
167
00:07:38,058 --> 00:07:39,493
Now fly!
168
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,562
[ chick chirping, flapping ]
169
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,697
[ splat! ]
170
00:07:43,764 --> 00:07:44,865
Medic!
171
00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:46,767
Crypty, it's been a great
seven years,
172
00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:48,702
but we are canceling
"Tales From The Crypt,"
173
00:07:48,769 --> 00:07:50,971
so thanks for all you've
done for the network.
174
00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:53,040
You're "hell-come"!
175
00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:55,876
[laughs evilly]
176
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:57,578
Yes, well, you can go now.
177
00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,847
You can't just sit
around here all day.
178
00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:01,215
You're driving me crazy.
179
00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:04,351
Guess I'll take a look at the
"help 'haunted"' ads!
180
00:08:04,418 --> 00:08:06,987
[laughs evilly]
181
00:08:08,789 --> 00:08:10,090
I'm looking.
182
00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:11,191
So, tell me, Mr. Keeper,
183
00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:13,293
what do you think you can bring
to this company?
184
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:16,697
Well, I've always been a real
"scream" player!
185
00:08:16,763 --> 00:08:19,266
[laughs evilly]
186
00:08:21,535 --> 00:08:23,937
O-O-O-kay.
187
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:25,772
Well, thank you
for coming in.
188
00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:29,009
How many job interviews can
one person mess up?
189
00:08:29,076 --> 00:08:30,410
Get a job.
190
00:08:30,477 --> 00:08:34,081
But, sweetie, you know this
economy is "terror-ible."
191
00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:37,217
[laughs evilly]
192
00:08:37,284 --> 00:08:39,586
Start lookin', ya bum!
193
00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:42,256
Hey, Skeletor, you gonna work
or just sit there jerkin' off?
194
00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:44,157
This is some serious
boo-shit.
195
00:08:44,224 --> 00:08:45,626
What did you just say?
196
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:48,228
Fired?!
My mother was right.
197
00:08:48,295 --> 00:08:51,498
I should never have married
a screw-up like you!
198
00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:54,735
Get off my case,
you fucking bitch!
199
00:08:54,801 --> 00:08:56,336
Wait. That wasn't a pun.
200
00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:57,804
[tires screeching ]
201
00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:00,641
My whole life has been
a grave mistake.
202
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:05,412
[laughs evilly, sobbing]
203
00:09:05,479 --> 00:09:07,214
Looks like I won't be...
204
00:09:07,281 --> 00:09:09,283
hanging around.
205
00:09:09,349 --> 00:09:10,350
Hunh!
206
00:09:10,417 --> 00:09:11,552
[ Body thuds]
207
00:09:11,618 --> 00:09:13,086
And now we shall hear
the eulogy,
208
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:15,689
or should I say
"ghoul-ogy," huh?
209
00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:17,591
[ laughs ]
210
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:18,926
Inappropriate?
211
00:09:18,992 --> 00:09:20,394
And launch!
212
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:23,163
[ Rockets firing ]
213
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:29,136
[Squeaking ]
214
00:09:29,202 --> 00:09:32,472
And now back to "An American
Werewolf in London."
215
00:09:32,539 --> 00:09:35,542
So you guys aren't allowed to
talk or smile or anything, huh?
216
00:09:35,609 --> 00:09:37,978
How about if I do this?
Raaarr!
217
00:09:38,045 --> 00:09:40,047
[ laughs ]
Honey, check it out!
218
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:41,848
Now, now, be nice.
219
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,850
These guys really don't
move at all!
220
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,119
[growling]
221
00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:47,821
[ laughs ]
222
00:09:47,888 --> 00:09:51,391
♪ [ hip-hop music plays] ♪
223
00:09:51,458 --> 00:09:52,926
♪ I'm Dr. Noonien Soong ♪
224
00:09:52,993 --> 00:09:54,361
♪ This is a Noonien song ♪
225
00:09:54,428 --> 00:09:56,830
♪ Your science is weak
but my science is strong ♪
226
00:09:56,897 --> 00:09:59,132
♪ My station is creation ♪
♪ Here's Data, I made him ♪
227
00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:01,768
♪ But this treat is not complete
without a big robotic dong ♪
228
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:03,236
♪ Data had a penis
in the show ♪
229
00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:05,772
I made a robot
with a dick, yo!
230
00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:07,674
Top secret!
231
00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:08,809
No, no!
232
00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:10,711
No way!
233
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:11,878
That happened!
234
00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:13,413
♪ Why'd you do it,
Dr. Soong? ♪
235
00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:15,582
♪ His ish had to be real ♪
236
00:10:15,649 --> 00:10:17,818
♪ He had to learn to feel ♪
237
00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:19,853
♪ He has a positronic brain ♪
238
00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:22,689
♪ Poon's positively
gettin' slain ♪
239
00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:25,759
I made a robot with a Wang!
240
00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:28,462
Bull's-eye!
Straight A's!
241
00:10:28,528 --> 00:10:31,398
♪ But don't ever, never flip
the switch labeled "turbo" ♪
242
00:10:31,465 --> 00:10:34,401
Wait! I thought
I disconnected that part!
243
00:10:34,468 --> 00:10:37,771
[ crashing ]
244
00:10:37,904 --> 00:10:40,140
♪ Hey! Crow hit the glass ♪
245
00:10:40,207 --> 00:10:41,642
♪ Fell hard on his ass ♪
246
00:10:41,708 --> 00:10:45,812
♪ And he got crow, crow,
crow, crow, crow ♪
247
00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:51,118
♪ Crow, crow, crow ♪
crow, crow, crow ♪
248
00:10:51,184 --> 00:10:53,286
Hey!
249
00:10:53,353 --> 00:10:54,855
♪ Crow ♪
17353
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof