All language subtitles for Beavis and Butthead S04E26 Teen Talk

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:16,620 --> 00:00:21,500 Captain Dick Jackman live with a very special event here at Highland High. 2 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:24,640 Principal McVicar, tell us what we're about to see. 3 00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:28,780 To promote this year's food drive. 4 00:00:29,310 --> 00:00:34,890 Our National Honor Society has glued together some canned goods to spell the 5 00:00:34,890 --> 00:00:38,130 word cares right under the Highland High name. 6 00:00:38,510 --> 00:00:39,930 Highland High cares. 7 00:00:40,130 --> 00:00:41,130 Isn't that wonderful? 8 00:00:41,970 --> 00:00:43,510 Let's take a look, Principal. 9 00:00:46,830 --> 00:00:52,370 What the... Well, back to you, Britney. 10 00:00:53,990 --> 00:00:58,870 I would like nothing more than to kill you both. 11 00:00:59,260 --> 00:01:00,640 with my bare hands. 12 00:01:01,660 --> 00:01:05,040 But I'm forced to give you a choice. 13 00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:10,620 Either you stay after school for a week, removing asbestos from the cafeteria, 14 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:15,660 or you go on Teen Talk with Captain Dick Jackman and confess. 15 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:17,680 Whoa. 16 00:01:18,420 --> 00:01:20,280 Is that, like, on TV? 17 00:01:21,130 --> 00:01:26,870 Yeah, he makes all the parents in town feel better about their own kids by 18 00:01:26,870 --> 00:01:30,750 publicly humiliating losers like you. We're going to be on TV. 19 00:01:31,010 --> 00:01:32,190 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 20 00:01:32,850 --> 00:01:34,630 This is going to be cool. 21 00:01:39,010 --> 00:01:42,730 Whoa. They turned that dude into, like, a guitar or something. 22 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:47,190 If I could turn myself into an instrument, I'd be an M -80. 23 00:01:48,630 --> 00:01:50,210 That's not an instrument, Vita. 24 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:51,760 No way, butthead. 25 00:01:52,020 --> 00:01:54,360 My music teacher told me you can make an instrument out of anything. 26 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,620 So I'd be like, you know, an M -80 or a chainsaw. 27 00:01:57,880 --> 00:01:59,680 Uh, okay, Viva. 28 00:02:04,260 --> 00:02:05,440 Whoa. Whoa. 29 00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:07,200 I'm clear. 30 00:02:07,860 --> 00:02:08,860 Whoa. 31 00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:18,000 Some of the guys in this band, it's like they just look like 32 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:18,939 regular guys. 33 00:02:18,940 --> 00:02:19,940 Yeah. 34 00:02:20,420 --> 00:02:21,420 And they're old. 35 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,340 Like, if you saw that drummer, like, in the grocery store, you'd just, like, 36 00:02:26,360 --> 00:02:27,920 probably just walk right past him. 37 00:02:28,980 --> 00:02:32,820 Or you'd say, like, the light beer is over an aisle 14 -8. 38 00:02:33,780 --> 00:02:34,780 Yeah. 39 00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:38,020 And then he'd say, thank you, young man. 40 00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:49,820 I bet when that drummer dude is, like, drinking beer with his friends, he, 41 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:51,100 Bogart's all the beer. 42 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:52,840 Yeah. 43 00:02:52,940 --> 00:02:56,820 And they're like, don't Bogart it, dude. He's like, no way. No way. I'm gonna 44 00:02:56,820 --> 00:02:58,940 keep drinking. I'll drink all the beer I want. Get out of here. 45 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:01,620 He's pretty cool. 46 00:03:02,820 --> 00:03:03,820 Yeah. 47 00:03:04,460 --> 00:03:06,800 I might knock back a beer beer later. 48 00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:09,960 You've never had a beer, dumbass? 49 00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:14,040 I mean, later, like, you know, two years. 50 00:03:21,629 --> 00:03:23,430 All right, listen up. 51 00:03:23,910 --> 00:03:28,690 If you're here to wise off on TV for your dropout friends watching at home, 52 00:03:28,790 --> 00:03:32,750 remember that you signed a piece of paper giving me legal right to kick your 53 00:03:32,750 --> 00:03:34,510 asses and sue you in court. 54 00:03:35,230 --> 00:03:37,510 Now everybody smile and lots of energy, okay? 55 00:03:39,550 --> 00:03:43,830 Hi, I'm Lolita, and this here's Tank Ray. 56 00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:51,180 Check this out. 57 00:03:52,260 --> 00:03:53,260 Hey, baby. 58 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:55,580 You're pretty hot. 59 00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:59,220 You should, like, be on a video or something. 60 00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:02,560 I am on a video. 61 00:04:03,260 --> 00:04:06,860 Like I wouldn't be here if my principal hadn't rented it. 62 00:04:09,930 --> 00:04:14,590 From the home of the Channel 4 News Center, it's Teen Talk with Captain Dick 63 00:04:14,590 --> 00:04:15,590 Jackman. 64 00:04:16,630 --> 00:04:22,310 Hey, kids. Welcome aboard Teen Talk. I'm Captain Dick Jackman. And as always, at 65 00:04:22,310 --> 00:04:27,550 6 .30 Sunday morning, I trade in my weathercasting gear to rap with young 66 00:04:27,550 --> 00:04:30,510 about what's going down in their world. 67 00:04:34,150 --> 00:04:37,990 You're cute, Sugar Britches. Let's talk about parents. 68 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:42,180 Any of you guys ever gotten real, real bad at your folks? 69 00:04:42,860 --> 00:04:45,000 It's okay to admit feelings of anger. 70 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,740 Well, Captain Dick, I guess we never got along too good. 71 00:04:49,020 --> 00:04:52,260 My dad beat me up a lot. My mom, like, ran off. How about you? 72 00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:56,360 What do your parents do that makes you really, really mad? 73 00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:01,260 This is boring. 74 00:05:01,980 --> 00:05:05,840 Y 'all want to go down behind the risers and make out or something? 75 00:05:16,260 --> 00:05:21,340 Stay tuned as Butthead discovers a mysterious growth in his pants. Coming 76 00:05:21,340 --> 00:05:22,340 next. 77 00:05:24,080 --> 00:05:28,380 I don't care if they're preschoolers. They can kiss my ass if they think I'm 78 00:05:28,380 --> 00:05:29,640 going to wear an Easter Bunny suit. 79 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:36,480 Hey, Captain Dick Jackman here, hanging with my home persons on Teen Talk. 80 00:05:36,970 --> 00:05:40,090 Today, we're going to rap about vandalism. 81 00:05:40,410 --> 00:05:44,770 Hey, y 'all, hurry up before we stop being horny. 82 00:05:45,870 --> 00:05:48,610 Hey, Viva, I think we're really going to get pumped. 83 00:05:49,050 --> 00:05:50,410 Yeah, on TV. 84 00:05:51,130 --> 00:05:55,750 Hey, guys, no talking without sharing. Let me ask you, have you ever wanted to 85 00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:56,990 just break something? 86 00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:58,990 Yeah, yeah, I like to break stuff. 87 00:05:59,810 --> 00:06:02,230 Uh, no, sir. Can we go? 88 00:06:02,590 --> 00:06:04,570 Hey, not so fast, young man. 89 00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:07,720 I just want all our young friends here to listen up. 90 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:11,100 You've had destructive impulses, right? 91 00:06:11,460 --> 00:06:12,460 Uh, no. 92 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:14,740 Yeah, no, no. 93 00:06:14,980 --> 00:06:16,000 We're gonna score. 94 00:06:16,300 --> 00:06:21,460 Hear that, kids? These young folks are saying down with destruction and up with 95 00:06:21,460 --> 00:06:22,460 cooperation. 96 00:06:22,740 --> 00:06:24,060 Right on, guys. 97 00:06:25,460 --> 00:06:28,100 Hey, butthead. Someone like stole our women. 98 00:06:28,500 --> 00:06:30,240 Hey, uh, my man. 99 00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:33,740 Don't you want to be cool and positive like these guys? 100 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:36,320 That sucks. 101 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:41,220 Yeah, it doesn't just suck, butthead. It really sucks. 102 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:44,580 If we never score, we're going to be wussies forever. 103 00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:45,840 It's going to suck. 104 00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:51,240 Settle down, Beavis. No, no, butthead. No, I can't settle down. It's not fair. 105 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:52,440 We're not going to score. 106 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:57,740 It's like we'll get cars and we'll have a job and we'll have to go mow lines and 107 00:06:57,740 --> 00:07:01,380 scrub the grill, and we're not going to score ever. Hey, hey, hey! 108 00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:03,400 I warned you about that. 109 00:07:03,770 --> 00:07:05,850 Don't make me come up there. Shut up, asswipe. 110 00:07:06,170 --> 00:07:07,170 You probably score. 111 00:07:07,730 --> 00:07:08,730 And you're a dork. 112 00:07:09,990 --> 00:07:11,130 I'm never going to score. 113 00:07:11,790 --> 00:07:12,790 Whoa. 114 00:07:16,850 --> 00:07:17,850 Cool. 115 00:07:20,070 --> 00:07:21,610 I feel like such an ass. 116 00:07:22,050 --> 00:07:24,210 Yeah, I feel like an ass, too. 117 00:07:24,590 --> 00:07:27,030 Beavis, go out and get me an ass, please. 118 00:07:27,650 --> 00:07:29,530 Okay, would you like some boobs to go with that? 119 00:07:29,770 --> 00:07:30,770 Yeah. 120 00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:32,440 What was that? 121 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:36,820 What's going on? That was just a chick screaming. 122 00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:41,260 I didn't like morning, so I didn't do that crap. 123 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:43,080 Damn it. 124 00:07:44,220 --> 00:07:47,940 You say that's your boyfriend, you say I'm out of line. Funny, he said I could 125 00:07:47,940 --> 00:07:48,940 call him up anytime. 126 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:53,940 Whoa. I ain't right, but if that's your boyfriend, he wasn't mad. This song's 127 00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:56,760 about, like, this chick doing it with some other chick's boyfriend. 128 00:07:58,320 --> 00:07:59,320 Yeah. 129 00:07:59,740 --> 00:08:00,740 That's pretty harsh. 130 00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:02,280 Yeah. 131 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:07,580 So, like, this chick will, like, only do you if you already have a girlfriend? 132 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:11,100 Yeah, yeah. A lot of chicks are like that. They don't want to go out with you 133 00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:12,100 you already have a girlfriend. 134 00:08:12,620 --> 00:08:14,900 You can't get a girlfriend because, like, you don't have a girlfriend. It's 135 00:08:14,900 --> 00:08:17,780 like, it's like, trust Brady. 136 00:08:20,900 --> 00:08:22,440 Damn it, what's going on here? 137 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:24,200 Taking the talk. 138 00:08:24,860 --> 00:08:27,160 Is this a commercial or a video? What is it? 139 00:08:27,860 --> 00:08:31,860 Viva, just shut up and, like, free your mind or something. 140 00:08:33,050 --> 00:08:35,990 I want to know what it is. I can't pay attention to that. 141 00:08:36,250 --> 00:08:38,909 Damn it, Beavis. Can't you just, like, roll out and listen? 142 00:08:39,270 --> 00:08:42,090 Damn it, butthead. What kind of crap were you talking? You sound like a damn 143 00:08:42,090 --> 00:08:45,130 hippie. Beavis, I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that. 144 00:08:45,950 --> 00:08:47,490 I'm not going to smack you today. 145 00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:53,490 Damn it, 146 00:08:56,710 --> 00:08:57,710 Beavis. 147 00:08:58,210 --> 00:09:00,490 I'm sick and tired of never getting any. 148 00:09:01,530 --> 00:09:04,870 Yeah. Me too. Hey, Beavis. 149 00:09:05,850 --> 00:09:08,690 I bet we're going to score now because we were, like, on TV. 150 00:09:10,290 --> 00:09:11,290 Oh, yeah. 151 00:09:11,670 --> 00:09:12,670 Hey, 152 00:09:14,930 --> 00:09:15,930 Beavis. 153 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:33,760 It's about a bad boner, isn't it? 154 00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:37,780 There's no such thing as a bad boner, Beavis. 155 00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:39,760 Oh, yeah, yeah. 156 00:09:40,660 --> 00:09:43,520 Now, wait a minute, buddy. I had a bad boner once. 157 00:09:44,540 --> 00:09:47,280 That's when I had the chicken pox and I had my hands duct taped. 158 00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:50,040 That's fucked. 159 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:52,600 Oh, yeah. 160 00:09:53,300 --> 00:09:55,220 I'm sorry. I stand corrected. 161 00:10:00,540 --> 00:10:06,900 Hey, but sometimes when I play pool, like when nobody's looking, I like to 162 00:10:06,900 --> 00:10:11,980 that blue chalk and like chalk up the end of my wiener. 163 00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:16,300 It's pretty cool. 164 00:10:18,460 --> 00:10:21,020 Yeah, that's cool. 165 00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:24,040 Doesn't that like hurt though? 166 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:28,040 Yeah, but you know, no pain, no gain. 167 00:10:31,479 --> 00:10:33,840 Hey, check it out. It's one of those magic eight balls. 168 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:37,060 Oh, yeah, yeah. You, like, ask one of those things a question, then you shake 169 00:10:37,060 --> 00:10:38,060 up and it tells you the answer? 170 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:39,440 Yeah. 171 00:10:39,820 --> 00:10:42,480 We should ask it, does this video suck? 172 00:10:44,120 --> 00:10:45,120 Yeah. 173 00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:46,500 Find the point to yes. 12713

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