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1
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OK. Thank you, Lady B.
2
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Right, for me, it's a nice day,
3
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so I would go for my tracky Bs, my tracky T and my white Hi-Tecs.
4
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Ooh! Trendy.
5
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Robin? Eh...
6
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..Apollo A7L spacesuit.
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You've got liquid cooling, portable life-support system,
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locking cuff, go, "Kshhh..."
9
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Spaceman. Yeah, really cool.
10
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It is cool. Julian?
11
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Trousers. Right, any sort of...?
12
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No, any kind of trousers.
13
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It's funny, you don't miss them till they're gone.
14
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No. Kitty?
15
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Blue jeans... and a green jumper.
16
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Like Alison?
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Oh, gosh. Yes!
18
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We'd be like twins. Captain?
19
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This.
20
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You're kidding. No. We're saying you get up in the morning
21
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and you can wear whatever you like.
22
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Thomas is wearing double denim with aviators!
23
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So...? And Mary
24
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is wearing a dress made out of seashells.
25
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With a simple lobster hat.
26
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Still wouldn't change a thing. All right.
27
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Well, that's it for "What I Would Wear If I Could Today"... today.
28
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Don't forget, later, Julian will be giving a speech
29
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at 6pm sharp, on the art of spin.
30
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Is that off spin or leg spin? Because...
31
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No, no. Different kind of spin. It's a political tactic, coined in the...
32
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's save it for later.
33
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Yeah, OK, yeah, OK. Cool, cool.
34
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Look at all these bits I found out there. Could be valuable.
35
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Ooh... That's interesting. That might be worth something.
36
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Is that Queen Victoria? Oh, that's Elizabeth II.
37
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Which one's that?
38
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Our one. Oh, I despair!
39
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Hmm. There might be something else worth something.
40
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There's an old pipe and whatever this is.
41
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Ah, looks like a musket ball.
42
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Yes, I think it is. They think it's a musket ball.
43
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It is.
44
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Thomas, you don't think that it's the one that...?
45
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I know it.
46
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Oh, God.
47
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Oh, God, it burns!
48
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Mock me no more, cruel world!
49
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It is a musket ball.
50
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Are you sure you want me to come?
51
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Everyone's bringing partners. Yeah, but it's your reunion.
52
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I didn't even go to your school. I'll just be like a lemon.
53
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Obi's going to be there. You can talk to him.
54
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Is that Kevin guy going?
55
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Kevin McMahan?
56
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You know who I'm talking about.
57
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The one you dumped when you met me.
58
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I don't know. Maybe.
59
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Is his partner going to be there? I don't know.
60
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I don't know if he has one.
61
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Right. OK.
62
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Yeah, cool. Are you OK? Yep. Cool.
63
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OK. Cool.
64
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Cool, cool, cool. I am cool.
65
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Thomas.
66
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I wanted to apologise for my outburst earlier today.
67
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Which one? You are kind to make light of it.
68
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It must've been a shock to see me so ruled by my emotions.
69
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Erm... You see, I was overcome with the memory of it all.
70
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Come in. 'Tis not a pleasant thing to contemplate, as you can imagine.
71
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Hmm.
72
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Perhaps I can give you account of the unhappy events
73
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of that fateful day.
74
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Oh, you don't have to.
75
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October 10th, 1824.
76
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OK. A crisp, autumnal afternoon.
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My cousin and I had accepted invitation
78
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to a gathering at Higham House,
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as it was then known.
80
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What a place. Imagine inheriting this!
81
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It's pleasant enough to visit.
82
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I wouldn't want to live here!
83
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The day's proceedings were to feature recitals
84
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of both music and poetry.
85
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Try not to embarrass me, cousin.
86
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I looked forward to unveiling my new work, but most of all,
87
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I looked forward to seeing once again Lord Higham's daughter...
88
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..my beloved Isabelle.
89
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Oh, my heart is aflutter, cousin.
90
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She is fine indeed.
91
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Shall we speak to the girl?
92
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Nay! Nay, nay, nay, nay.
93
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She is with her father.
94
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He does not know we have an attachment we cannot speak openly.
95
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Though I long to know that her feelings are unchanged.
96
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Write her a note, then.
97
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I will deliver it. I will be your Cupid.
98
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I penned a note, thanked my cousin...
99
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Thank you, Cousin.
100
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..and waited, breath bated, for the...
101
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Oh, where is that thing?
102
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I am listening.
103
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Carry on.
104
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Snickers? Yes.
105
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What's wrong with Marathon?
106
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Snickers just sounds like, "It's knickers".
107
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'S'knickers. 'S'knickers.
108
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Well, is that a bad thing?
109
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Well, no, I suppose not, but what does it mean? I mean, the word.
110
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It doesn't make any bloody sense, does it?
111
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Am I early? As usual!
112
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You and Lady B are always the first.
113
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What?
114
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I was just saying, you're always the first.
115
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You could set a clock by you two.
116
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Well, there's nothing wrong with being punctual.
117
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Anyway, it's not six yet, so...
118
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..let's talk amongst ourselves, shall we?
119
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So. your cousin gave her your letter?
120
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Yes. Oh, my...!
121
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In the meantime, the day's entertainments had begun...
122
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Oh.
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And soon it came my turn to enthral.
124
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And now, esteemed guests,
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we are honoured by a recital from our greatest living poet,
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Thomas Thorne.
127
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Summer hath aroused
128
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the twilight of life in the hay
129
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Shadows long and dark
130
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Time has passed since the honeymoon of May
131
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And held aloft by rosy buds
132
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Whose nectar sweet forbade...
133
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How I longed to read her words.
134
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But Hermione And Roger is an epic poem,
135
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and I could not cheat my rapt audience.
136
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Upon the banks of the rushing Ouse
137
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Sits there a poor man...
138
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Oh, welcome, Death...
139
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Two hours later, I finally reached the climax of the piece.
140
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On this Earth, we are but lodger
141
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For she was his Hermione
142
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And he... always...
143
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..her Roger!
144
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Bravo! Bravo!
145
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The man's a genius!
146
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Oh, God!
147
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Oh, thank you.
148
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Pray silence for Lady Isabelle.
149
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Her letter, cousin.
150
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"Dear Mr Thorne.
151
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"I'm sorry, but I do not love you.
152
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"Perhaps you misinterpreted my words or actions when last we met."
153
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Might you have done?
154
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I mean, you do maybe have the tendency to, you know,
155
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get the wrong idea.
156
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Are you saying what I think you're saying?
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Almost definitely not.
158
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And again, not. No.
159
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Hmm.
160
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Mm.
161
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Nah, bruv.
162
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I was just thinking the other day...
163
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There you go.
164
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They're late.
165
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Always the same ones. Well...
166
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Well, what else have they got to do? I know.
167
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Not stuck in traffic, are they? Or washing their hair.
168
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Let's play a game to pass the time.
169
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How about Grandma Went To The Shops And Bought An Apple?
170
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Oh, not this! Sake!
171
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As my sweetheart played on, I was racked with confusion.
172
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I cannot fathom it.
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Her affections were so clear before.
174
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Poor cousin.
175
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Perhaps her father has discovered us and forbidden the match.
176
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I must know.
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Let her tell me to my face, at least. Have a care, cousin.
178
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I wouldn't want you further hurt in this.
179
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Shall we take our leave? Stand aside, cousin. Excuse me.
180
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Excuse me. Excuse me.
181
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Isabelle Higham?
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Ha! The girl's unbearable.
183
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Ugly and untalented.
184
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Unbearable, you say?!
185
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Untalented, you say?!
186
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Damn your eyes, I say!
187
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Damn your head, shoulders, knees and toes, sir!
188
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And what concern is it of yours?
189
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I happen to love that woman of whom you speak.
190
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And I demand satisfaction.
191
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If her father thought me unworthy before,
192
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he certainly thought me worthy now.
193
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Very well.
194
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Good luck, cousin.
195
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The evening air was cold.
196
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Those of steady stomach came to witness my bravery.
197
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Now count your paces.
198
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Four, five, six...
199
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..11, 12...
200
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Good God.
201
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Thomas! Cousin!
202
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We didn't get to 20.
203
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I am shot.
204
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He cheated, the coward!
205
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I am done for.
206
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May God welcome me to the heavens.
207
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My beloved!
208
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My darling!
209
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Oh, how foolish was I to believe Papa would not approve.
210
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You are the best of men.
211
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Kiss me...
212
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..as the French do.
213
00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:22,560
Oh. Oh!
214
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,400
That didn't happen.
215
00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,720
What? It didn't happen!
216
00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:30,240
I was there.
217
00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:35,040
Of course you were!
218
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Well, that's how I remembered it.
219
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Go on, Robin. I remember that day.
220
00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:43,360
Great! Are we really going to...? Let's hear it.
221
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:45,920
He come on horsey with pasty friend.
222
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It big, nice house.
223
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Nice to come. Me not want live here.
224
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Oh, blast!
225
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After he clean poo from his lady shoes, he come inside.
226
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Oh, what you got there?
227
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Ta-da!
228
00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:08,120
Look that.
229
00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:11,360
What so good?
230
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No!
231
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No, do it again. Do it again!
232
00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:21,360
And now, man called Thomas do poem.
233
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Something 'bout flowers, or wine or girls, or something.
234
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It was big boring, but outside, something happened.
235
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Blink one for yes, two for no.
236
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No!
237
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Really?
238
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Where?
239
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Something was in grounds.
240
00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:48,400
Ooh! There!
241
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I have sixth sense, so I follow.
242
00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:07,600
And then I see baby deer dead.
243
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What beast did this?
244
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Robin?
245
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:12,360
What creature...? Robin?
246
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What demon...? Robin! Robin.
247
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It's a bit off topic. But it just getting to a good bit.
248
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It's got nothing to do with how I died.
249
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Eh... Oh, I remembers that!
250
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Oh, yes! Not you two as well.
251
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This is amazing.
252
00:13:27,520 --> 00:13:30,840
OK, you're sure? Is he definitely going tonight?
253
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:34,160
Well, I mean, the event page says he is.
254
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:36,720
Grandma went to the shops and bought an apple,
255
00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:38,480
a packet of Monster Crunch...
256
00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:40,120
Munch. Munch,
257
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:42,280
a bottle of sherry...
258
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:43,520
..Playboy magazine...
259
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..and...
260
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An Enfield No.2 standard-issue revolver. Yes, that.
261
00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:52,240
You know he's a boxer now? Yeah, he got into that in prison.
262
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Prison?
263
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..a swingball, and a... ..big tank of a man.
264
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Oh, ah...
265
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Well, it's your go. It can be anything.
266
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Come on, Fanny. ..a-a-a lace brassiere!
267
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Ooh, saucy!
268
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What are you worried about anyway? Alison dumped him when she met me.
269
00:14:10,640 --> 00:14:12,480
Oh. Did she?
270
00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:13,920
It was ages ago, wasn't it?
271
00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:16,120
So, he'd be over it by now, wouldn't he?
272
00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:18,760
Hmm, probably, yeah, yeah.
273
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:20,360
Mm...
274
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,600
Mary, you must remember what happened.
275
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:23,680
Oh, yeah.
276
00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:25,520
I remembers it well.
277
00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:31,960
The room was full of dandies and wenches,
278
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:35,480
talking and all floating about the place.
279
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:39,920
They had wine coming out of their ears.
280
00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:44,080
It happens all the time. The people all laughed and danced.
281
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:51,240
When Thomas came in, Lady Isabelle did look at him.
282
00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:53,200
Said I to Annie...
283
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,600
Is he the man of which she spoke?
284
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:59,520
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Annie? Who's Annie?
285
00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:01,560
ALL MUMBLE IN SURPRISE
286
00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:01,560
Oh, did we never tell you?
287
00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:05,640
Oh, yeah, yeah, Annie ghosted here for 100 year or more.
288
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,160
A true friend to me.
289
00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:08,440
I see.
290
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:10,160
Till she got sucked off.
291
00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:11,400
I'm sorry?
292
00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:16,800
Ah, like, moved on? Oh, yeah. There's many that's been sucked off
293
00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:19,240
in this house. Moved on. I used to dream of the day
294
00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:21,240
that I would be sucked off. Moved on.
295
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:23,720
But I've long since given up hope of ever being sucked off.
296
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:25,520
Moving on. Anyways...
297
00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:29,880
..Annie and I did watch, and Thomas said his poem...
298
00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:34,440
Summer hath aroused the twilights of lifes in the haze...
299
00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:36,960
..and the people all turned to statues.
300
00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:41,080
Honestly, I think they died of boredoms.
301
00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:43,680
Oh, come, now. This is a nonsense!
302
00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:45,680
I says it as I remembers I sees it, mate.
303
00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:48,560
Kitty, you must have been there, too. Yes.
304
00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:49,800
And me!
305
00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:53,040
Good God, how long have you been there?! Oh, the whole time.
306
00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:56,400
Yeah, I remember it. So many beautiful shoes.
307
00:15:56,400 --> 00:16:00,680
Some heeled, some flat, one pair of boots with lovely buckles.
308
00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:02,520
Wait, did you just see shoes?
309
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:03,680
Pretty much, yeah.
310
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:06,200
Hmm. Kitty, what did you see?
311
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:07,920
Oh, I don't know if I should say.
312
00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:10,440
Aren't you meant to be going out with Michael this evening?
313
00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,320
We've already detained you long enough.
314
00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:16,000
No, but I want to hear what Kitty saw. Mike, I'll be five minutes.
315
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,800
Take your time.
316
00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,520
Great.
317
00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:22,240
Perfect. Fantastic.
318
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:23,600
Go on, Kitty. All right.
319
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:26,760
Well, to start with, it was so exciting.
320
00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:31,120
All sorts of interesting people coming to the house,
321
00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:33,160
food laid out on a table.
322
00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:36,080
What kind of food?
323
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,040
No, come one, come all!
324
00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:42,000
The more, the merrier. We're only talking about my death!
325
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,680
We were supposed to muster at 1800 hours in the common room
326
00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:47,800
for Julian's talk. Postpone it. You've literally got forever.
327
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:50,120
Carry on, Kitty.
328
00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:52,560
Where was I? You were talking about a spread.
329
00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:54,960
Now, was it like a buffet sort of thing?
330
00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:56,680
You know, cheese and pineapple?
331
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:58,120
Pineapple?!
332
00:16:58,120 --> 00:17:01,160
Goodness, no. They were wealthy, but they weren't royalty.
333
00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:07,000
I remember Thomas arriving, so in love with Lady Isabelle.
334
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:09,360
Is he the man of which she spoke?
335
00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:10,840
Looks a silly arse.
336
00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:15,080
I remember his poem. Welcome, Death!
337
00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:16,800
Oh, sweetest sleep...
338
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:19,920
I don't understand poetry very well, but it must have been funny
339
00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:22,000
because people were giggling.
340
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,360
And he always...
341
00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:27,360
..her Roger!
342
00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:28,760
HE SNORTS
343
00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:32,080
The man's a penis.
344
00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:36,760
And I remember the argument Thomas didn't like something he heard.
345
00:17:36,760 --> 00:17:39,440
What do you think of this Shelley woman I keep hearing about?
346
00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:40,920
Oh, she's unbearable.
347
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:43,480
Ugly and untalented.
348
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:44,720
Shelley?
349
00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:47,120
No, that can't be right. You've got that wrong.
350
00:17:47,120 --> 00:17:50,200
That's what I heard Mary Shelley, the writer.
351
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:52,520
Unbearable, you say?
352
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:55,040
Untalented, you say?
353
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,640
Damn your eyes, I say!
354
00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:59,960
Damn your head...
355
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:04,120
..shoulders, knees and toes, sir.
356
00:18:04,120 --> 00:18:07,040
And what concern is it of yours?
357
00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:10,440
I happen to love that woman of whom you speak.
358
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,320
And I...
359
00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:14,560
Sorry, does anybody have a glove?
360
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:16,080
Can I borrow your glove?
361
00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:18,000
No. Fine.
362
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,560
Imagine the glove.
363
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:21,600
I demand satisfaction.
364
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:26,080
Very well. Really?
365
00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:27,400
Yes.
366
00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:29,840
God... Good.
367
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:31,320
Good God.
368
00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:34,000
Lady Isabelle didn't see what Thomas had done.
369
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:36,760
Why are they duelling? Over Mary Shelley.
370
00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:38,880
Apparently, the poet is in love with her.
371
00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:44,080
Seven, eight, nine, ten...
372
00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,040
Ah!
373
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:57,640
Do you mind?!
374
00:18:57,640 --> 00:18:59,440
Kitty was telling the story!
375
00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,120
You weren't even there!
376
00:19:01,120 --> 00:19:02,760
Well, it's what I would have done.
377
00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:05,360
Close-quarter battle...
378
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,120
Excuse me, but what shoes was he...?
379
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:09,600
I don't know why that's relevant. All I wanted to do was...
380
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:12,000
..they're a low-model rifle.
381
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:13,840
Alison.
382
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:17,720
I just want to hear what... Alison. Yeah, hi. Hi, sorry. I'm going to be down in, like, one second.
383
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,360
Just... Shh! You don't even know her!
384
00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:23,640
Shh-shh-shh! Just... It looks like you've got something to deal with here. Maybe second thoughts about
385
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:26,120
the reunion? That's cool. We don't have to go. No problem.
386
00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:27,960
What? I can just... go back to... No, no.
387
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:31,400
We're still going to go. I just need to finish something real quick.
388
00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:34,640
Yeah, it's just that I actually... Just really quickly.
389
00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:37,200
Everyone, just let Kitty finish.
390
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:40,800
OK. They marched away from each other.
391
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:42,520
I could hardly bear to watch.
392
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:43,840
Oh...
393
00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:47,680
Five, six...
394
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:51,960
..nine, ten...
395
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:53,720
..11, 12.
396
00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:03,000
Oh! Good God!
397
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:06,120
Sorry.
398
00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:10,760
Cousin!
399
00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:12,520
We didn't get to 20.
400
00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:14,880
I am shot!
401
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,800
He cheated, the coward!
402
00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:25,760
I know she doesn't love me but, please, fetch Isabelle,
403
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:27,560
that I might say goodbye to her.
404
00:20:29,120 --> 00:20:30,800
Of course.
405
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:39,240
He waited...
406
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:41,880
..and waited...
407
00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,800
..but she never came.
408
00:21:08,360 --> 00:21:10,400
You OK?
409
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:12,520
Fine, yeah. Just... something in my eye.
410
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:15,600
So now you know.
411
00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:20,000
I wanted you to believe better of me, but the truth is...
412
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,720
..I was a fool.
413
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:25,720
A fool who died alone and unloved.
414
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:28,880
Hang on. Your cousin, he wasn't wearing boots
415
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,800
with bronze buckles, was he?
416
00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:33,240
We've finished now, Humphrey.
417
00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:35,080
Yes. Why?
418
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,560
Well, who was he writing letters to?
419
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:38,920
What?
420
00:21:38,920 --> 00:21:41,160
Well, he wrote two letters.
421
00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:43,200
On the stairs, where I was.
422
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:47,440
Why would he...?
423
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:50,720
Please, fetch Isabelle, that I might say goodbye.
424
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:53,680
Of course.
425
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:57,640
No!
426
00:21:57,640 --> 00:21:59,280
What a place.
427
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:01,720
Imagine inheriting this.
428
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:04,120
My heart is aflutter, cousin.
429
00:22:04,120 --> 00:22:05,520
She is fine indeed.
430
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:08,640
Write her a note, then. I will deliver it.
431
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:10,680
I will be your Cupid.
432
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,520
Thank you, cousin.
433
00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,160
"Please understand,
434
00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:25,520
"I do not love you.
435
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:27,480
"Thomas Thorne."
436
00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:31,400
And held aloft by rosy buds.
437
00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:34,400
But how could his feelings have cooled so quickly?
438
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:37,640
You deserve better. My cousin... How can I say this?
439
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:39,880
..has many fancies.
440
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,320
A typical poet.
441
00:22:44,120 --> 00:22:46,000
Nectar sweet forbade...
442
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:52,280
"Dear Mr Thorne, I'm sorry, but I do not love you."
443
00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:54,000
I must know!
444
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:55,440
Let her tell me to my face, please.
445
00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:57,520
Have a care, cousin.
446
00:22:57,520 --> 00:22:59,760
I would not want you further hurt in this.
447
00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:03,560
Come to think of it, it was Francis who told me about the officer.
448
00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:05,320
Excuse me.
449
00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:08,200
Say, what do you think of this Shelley woman I keep hearing about?
450
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:09,640
Oh, she's unbearable.
451
00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:11,560
Ugly and untalented.
452
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:17,320
He called Isabelle unbearable and untalented.
453
00:23:17,320 --> 00:23:19,760
Damn your eyes, I say!
454
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:22,120
Very well.
455
00:23:22,120 --> 00:23:23,880
20 paces, cousin.
456
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:25,320
20?
457
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:30,120
11, 12...
458
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:37,320
We didn't get to 20!
459
00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:39,040
Thomas! Cousin!
460
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:41,280
I am shot!
461
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,160
He cheated, the coward!
462
00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:46,560
Please, fetch Isabelle, that I might say goodbye.
463
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:47,800
Of course.
464
00:23:57,640 --> 00:23:59,320
Mm.
465
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:01,600
But he didn't fetch her.
466
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,560
He was taken too soon!
467
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,320
He is gone. He is gone, and there's nothing we can do.
468
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:09,520
Oh, God, Thomas! Oh, you poor thing.
469
00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:12,320
Oh, what he's put you through, it is not fair.
470
00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:15,840
Let me lend you some comfort. Oh, you are kind.
471
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:17,520
Forgive me. I...
472
00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:19,320
..I don't even know your name.
473
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:21,560
Button. Francis Button.
474
00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:24,720
Button?!
475
00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:26,400
Yes. They got married.
476
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,440
It was their son who returned here to live.
477
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:31,320
My George's grandfather.
478
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:33,240
This letter...
479
00:24:33,240 --> 00:24:34,520
..is a lie.
480
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:36,720
I thought it was not her usual hand.
481
00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:39,400
And her name is misspelt. I just thought
482
00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,000
she'd written it in a hurry.
483
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,280
Mm. All those years
484
00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:46,720
I thought I'd been spurned when, really...
485
00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:48,760
..she did love me.
486
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:50,520
Does that make you feel any better?
487
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:53,560
No, it's worse!
488
00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:55,160
Mm.
489
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:57,240
Wait, hold on. Button? So...
490
00:24:57,240 --> 00:24:59,760
..that means we're related. Yes!
491
00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:01,520
Yeah. No.
492
00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:04,600
I mean, very distantly related. Our children would be fine.
493
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:07,840
We're probably all related, if you go back far enough.
494
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:09,640
Yeah, you all come from me.
495
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:11,080
And my sister.
496
00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:12,440
Mm?
497
00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:16,560
Heh-heh, joking!
498
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:18,960
Right, that's quite enough of this nonsense.
499
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:21,680
Shall we go and listen to Julian's talk? It's only 43 minutes late.
500
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:22,920
What be it about?
501
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:24,960
The art of spin -
502
00:25:24,960 --> 00:25:28,600
how the same fact or story can be told in different ways to, you know,
503
00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:30,560
promote a particular bias.
504
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:32,040
Well, I think we've covered that.
505
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:34,160
Well done, Humphrey.
506
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:35,920
Not just a pretty face.
507
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:39,000
Well, I am. Yes, I suppose you are.
508
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:47,360
Right, shall we hit the road?
509
00:25:47,360 --> 00:25:49,360
I don't want to go.
510
00:25:49,360 --> 00:25:51,040
What? I don't want to go,
511
00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:53,080
because Kevin, right, you dumped him for me,
512
00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:54,840
and I looked him up, and he's a boxer.
513
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,800
He fights people. And Obi says he's done time, so if he's not over you,
514
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:00,920
I don't want to go because... He dumped me.
515
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:03,840
What?
516
00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:05,960
He dumped me.
517
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:08,680
I told you that I dumped him because
518
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:10,720
I thought it made it sound better.
519
00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:13,240
And I wanted to make you think that I was choosing you.
520
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:14,800
Which I... which I was. So...
521
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:16,600
No, I was choosing you. So I was a rebound?
522
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:18,400
No!
523
00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:21,600
Well, kind of. At first.
524
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:25,480
Look, he's not going to be angry at you, because he dumped me.
525
00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:28,240
And I'm glad he did.
526
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:35,480
Come on, then. Let's go.
527
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:39,040
Of course, I don't know what you're worried about,
528
00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:41,320
because you're a black belt in taekwondo.
529
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:43,120
Yeah...
530
00:26:43,120 --> 00:26:44,720
..I did say that.
531
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:14,760
Fie!
37028
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