Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,155 --> 00:00:02,808
Psst! Fellas, fellas...
2
00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:05,522
What if I impractically-joke
David cross?
3
00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:07,012
Certainly. Yeah.
4
00:00:07,097 --> 00:00:08,325
I'm gonna do it.
Knock yourself out.
5
00:00:09,951 --> 00:00:11,024
Hey, guys.
6
00:00:11,109 --> 00:00:13,062
Hey. What's up, buddy?
7
00:00:13,147 --> 00:00:15,598
Let's get this thing started.
8
00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:17,400
Hey, oh,
this is some creative...
9
00:00:17,484 --> 00:00:19,844
Oh, you got a stain
on your shirt, bud.
10
00:00:19,929 --> 00:00:22,405
Yeah?
11
00:00:22,489 --> 00:00:24,108
What the **** Man?!
12
00:00:26,627 --> 00:00:28,877
S-sorry. No, he deserved it.
13
00:00:28,962 --> 00:00:30,480
You know what's
really messed up?
14
00:00:30,564 --> 00:00:32,683
David, you really do
have a stain on your shirt.
15
00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:33,884
Oh, where, where?
It's right there.
16
00:00:33,968 --> 00:00:34,885
It's right there. Boop!
17
00:00:37,638 --> 00:00:39,356
You got me, 'cause I thought
there was a stain.
18
00:00:41,794 --> 00:00:42,794
Stop!
19
00:00:56,857 --> 00:00:57,974
Let's just get this started.
20
00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,576
Are you **** Kidding me?
21
00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:00,911
Who's a good dog?
22
00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:11,854
With special guest
David cross!
23
00:01:11,938 --> 00:01:13,767
Use it!
24
00:01:15,451 --> 00:01:16,993
Today,
we're cleaning the garage.
25
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:19,462
And it's a huge job,
so we've hired someone to help.
26
00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:22,595
The thing is, we have no idea
what we're about to come across
27
00:01:22,680 --> 00:01:24,534
Because it's been put there
by the other guys.
28
00:01:24,618 --> 00:01:27,069
If you refuse to do
or say anything, you lose.
29
00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:29,655
Shut up!
30
00:01:33,159 --> 00:01:35,678
So, Q has no idea
what's inside his garage.
31
00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:37,480
When he pulls up the door, he'll
see what we planned for him.
32
00:01:37,564 --> 00:01:41,618
Oh, boys,
what mysteries await me?
33
00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:44,421
There's an old friend
in here from times past.
34
00:01:44,505 --> 00:01:47,023
From lonelier times.
35
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,625
Oh, what's your name?
36
00:01:48,709 --> 00:01:50,110
- Marie.
- I'm Brian.
37
00:01:50,195 --> 00:01:51,628
- Hi, Brian.
- So nice to meet you.
38
00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:53,630
Nice to meet you.
Just donating some stuff.
39
00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:55,643
Just giving it to charity.
It won't take that long.
40
00:01:55,727 --> 00:01:57,927
- Oh, here we go!
- Yeah.
41
00:01:59,653 --> 00:02:01,237
Yeah.
42
00:02:01,321 --> 00:02:03,774
Do you want to start with
the sex robot in front of you
43
00:02:03,858 --> 00:02:05,842
Or end with it?
44
00:02:05,926 --> 00:02:08,244
What stuff are you donating?
45
00:02:08,328 --> 00:02:11,114
Well, I was gonna donate
this... this here, um, uh...
46
00:02:11,198 --> 00:02:12,315
Sex robot.
47
00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:14,384
Yeah, just be gentle with her.
48
00:02:14,468 --> 00:02:16,252
She's been through a lot.
Do you need release?
49
00:02:16,336 --> 00:02:18,989
No, you're going...
50
00:02:19,073 --> 00:02:21,458
Robot, turn off.
51
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:23,193
Suck mode activated.
52
00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:25,128
Robot off.
53
00:02:25,212 --> 00:02:27,330
Oh, my god!
54
00:02:27,414 --> 00:02:29,332
Q there's an urn in there buddy.
Find the urn.
55
00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:32,402
Uh, that urn is uncle pep pep.
56
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:35,521
What's that?
This is uncle pep pep.
57
00:02:37,357 --> 00:02:38,541
Oh ****
58
00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:41,812
Q, freak out
that you got uncle pep on you.
59
00:02:41,896 --> 00:02:44,614
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no!
60
00:02:44,966 --> 00:02:47,757
No, no, no, no! Oh, no!
61
00:02:48,093 --> 00:02:50,278
Oh! My aunt's gonna have a cow.
62
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,222
Oh, my god.
63
00:02:55,993 --> 00:02:58,361
Just clean it
and clean yourself up.
64
00:02:58,445 --> 00:02:59,639
She makes so much sense.
65
00:02:59,724 --> 00:03:03,064
Marie is a woman of few words,
and they're all practical.
66
00:03:03,167 --> 00:03:05,168
Put that right there,
underneath.
67
00:03:05,252 --> 00:03:07,638
She is telling him
what to do with his own ****
68
00:03:07,722 --> 00:03:09,772
Can you drop
the ashes everywhere, buddy?
69
00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:11,441
Alright.
70
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:12,575
Are you gonna want this?
71
00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:13,710
Okay.
72
00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:16,579
- Oh, I'll go pick it up.
- The urn fell over.
73
00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:18,915
Oh, shit. It just fell.
74
00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:22,452
Oh, no!
75
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,521
Oh, my god!
What are we gonna do?!
76
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:26,456
I thought it was
a level surface!
77
00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:29,592
Wait a minute.
What? What do you got?
78
00:03:29,676 --> 00:03:32,795
I got it.
Oh, my god! She's amazing!
79
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:34,397
Don't panic.
80
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,199
Okay, okay.
81
00:03:36,283 --> 00:03:41,204
She's cleaning up the ashes
of uncle pep pep.
82
00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:42,338
Don't... wait a minute.
83
00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:43,606
I'm doing it gradually.
Okay, I'm sorry.
84
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:48,478
You want her on your side,
this woman.
85
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,613
Yeah. She's no nonsense.
86
00:03:50,697 --> 00:03:52,815
There's a stone in there.
Should I get that out?
87
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,218
Yeah, get it out. Okay.
88
00:03:55,302 --> 00:03:56,486
Q, your hand is caught
in the urn.
89
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,154
You can't get it out.
90
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,757
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
91
00:04:02,108 --> 00:04:03,360
No, no, no, no, no, no!
92
00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:05,295
Are you serious?
93
00:04:07,314 --> 00:04:08,899
Could you try pulling that?
94
00:04:08,983 --> 00:04:11,083
You know what's gonna happen?
95
00:04:13,654 --> 00:04:15,438
I just want to lube it up
a little bit.
96
00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:18,174
Lubing in 10... No, no, no.
97
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:19,910
...9, 8...
98
00:04:22,196 --> 00:04:24,314
Oh, my god!
99
00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:25,982
It is a bit of a mess.
100
00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:27,183
Yeah.
101
00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:29,319
Hey, Sal, take a look
at what you got in there, buddy.
102
00:04:29,403 --> 00:04:31,854
Kindly notice
the boxes and cases
103
00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:34,925
Of N95 masks and sanitizer.
104
00:04:35,009 --> 00:04:36,727
First, you know what
the biggest thing is
105
00:04:36,811 --> 00:04:38,261
That we have in this garage
seems to be
106
00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:42,865
The extreme, um, amount of ppe
and hand sanitizer.
107
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,867
Yeah.
108
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:46,295
I'll go on, like, the website
109
00:04:46,380 --> 00:04:48,204
And see where, like,
things are spiking.
110
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,473
Tell her that you sell it
at a huge profit.
111
00:04:52,359 --> 00:04:54,945
Then I'll try to sell it out of
like a trunk or something.
112
00:04:55,029 --> 00:04:56,608
At a healthy markup.
113
00:04:56,693 --> 00:04:58,681
Yeah, like, at a healthy markup.
114
00:04:58,765 --> 00:05:00,150
Yeah. I bet.
You have to do it. Yeah.
115
00:05:00,234 --> 00:05:01,752
Ka-ching! Yeah.
116
00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:07,424
Notice the picture you framed
there in the corner, behind you.
117
00:05:07,508 --> 00:05:09,826
Yeah. That should get out, too.
118
00:05:11,578 --> 00:05:13,430
Oh, god, yeah. This is...
119
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:15,165
This is **** Up.
120
00:05:15,249 --> 00:05:16,433
Don't want to lose this.
121
00:05:16,517 --> 00:05:20,503
This is, uh...
122
00:05:20,587 --> 00:05:22,305
You know,
this is Saddam Hussein.
123
00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:24,040
Oh, no kidding?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
124
00:05:24,124 --> 00:05:25,842
He meant a lot to me as a child.
125
00:05:25,926 --> 00:05:28,578
So, to me, um...
126
00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:31,047
To me, he's just good old
uncle Saddam.
127
00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:36,519
So, don't... what I say is,
don't judge a book by its cover.
128
00:05:36,603 --> 00:05:37,603
I'm sure, yeah.
129
00:05:39,073 --> 00:05:40,323
Yeah, exactly.
130
00:05:40,407 --> 00:05:42,581
Thank god you feel that way.
131
00:05:42,954 --> 00:05:45,996
Whoo, boy.
Find the box of vhs tapes.
132
00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:48,665
Oh, my god.
133
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:50,000
VHS.
134
00:05:50,084 --> 00:05:51,734
You've definitely used vhs,
right?
135
00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:53,003
Yeah, I have.
136
00:05:53,087 --> 00:05:54,737
Can you just take that for me?
137
00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:57,007
Oh, what's in the vhs box,
though, bud?
138
00:05:57,091 --> 00:05:58,408
What are those, anyway?
139
00:05:58,492 --> 00:06:00,743
Um, I think they just...
What titles are there?
140
00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:03,346
Like "man with goat,"
"man with horse."
141
00:06:04,699 --> 00:06:06,549
What other ones?
142
00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:07,950
What... what other ones?
143
00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:09,285
Um, I don't know.
144
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,087
Honestly, um, I think
I'm gonna go home.
145
00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:14,491
I'm a little confused.
146
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:17,494
Oh, my god, bud. Oh!
147
00:06:17,578 --> 00:06:19,896
What does that even mean?
148
00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:21,764
You lost.
Yeah, it means you lost.
149
00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:24,767
Give me a **** Break
with this turn.
150
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,436
"Man with horse"?
151
00:06:29,256 --> 00:06:30,507
Alright, here we go.
152
00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,641
Alright, here he goes.
153
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:32,642
Alright.
154
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,711
Oh, god. Oh.
155
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:37,914
Okay.
156
00:06:37,998 --> 00:06:40,583
There is zero negative
space in there.
157
00:06:40,667 --> 00:06:42,785
Burrow in there
like the ferret that you are.
158
00:06:42,869 --> 00:06:44,787
Yeah. Let me... give me...
159
00:06:44,871 --> 00:06:46,594
Give me your shoulder
to lean on.
160
00:06:46,679 --> 00:06:47,724
I'm gonna go in.
161
00:06:47,808 --> 00:06:49,059
- You got it?
- Yeah.
162
00:06:49,143 --> 00:06:50,260
You got it? Okay, here we go.
163
00:06:50,344 --> 00:06:51,662
Let's figure this out. Okay.
164
00:06:51,746 --> 00:06:53,930
Okay. Okay.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
165
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:56,599
Now leap. Now leap.
166
00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,288
Oh.
167
00:07:04,891 --> 00:07:06,543
Okay, hold on. Hold on, Pete.
You alright?
168
00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:09,612
I'm gonna do this.
169
00:07:09,696 --> 00:07:11,548
Come here.
Let's get these out of here.
170
00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:12,949
Okay.
171
00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:14,885
Take a breather and have
a little heart-to-heart chat.
172
00:07:14,969 --> 00:07:16,352
Have a seat.
Have a seat for a second.
173
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,888
Take a load of.
We're working hard, have a seat.
174
00:07:17,972 --> 00:07:20,223
You know, what happened
is my dad passed away.
175
00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:22,893
A week later,
my mom married my step dad.
176
00:07:22,977 --> 00:07:25,628
My dad passed away, right?
Yeah.
177
00:07:25,712 --> 00:07:29,700
A week later,
my mom marries my step dad.
178
00:07:29,784 --> 00:07:31,501
Pete, I don't like him at all.
179
00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:33,704
You know, it's just, you know,
he came in, he's not my father.
180
00:07:33,788 --> 00:07:36,038
He's got this huge,
old dong on him.
181
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:40,777
He's got... my step dad...
182
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:42,445
Has this...
183
00:07:42,529 --> 00:07:45,782
My step dad has this huge,
old dong on him.
184
00:07:45,866 --> 00:07:48,719
Oh, my god. ****
185
00:07:48,803 --> 00:07:52,055
My mother won't stop talking
about it.
186
00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:56,459
Oh, my god.
187
00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:57,928
Start throwing that dong around.
188
00:07:58,012 --> 00:07:59,996
Yeah, you know, I don't want him
189
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,798
To start throwing
the weight of that dong...
190
00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:06,803
You know,
'cause his dong is big, feet.
191
00:08:06,887 --> 00:08:08,338
Just a giant dong.
192
00:08:08,422 --> 00:08:10,540
Yeah, that dong's in there
floating around right now.
193
00:08:10,624 --> 00:08:11,942
Yeah, someone in the house...
194
00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:17,480
There's nothing in the house.
There's nothing.
195
00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:20,951
Too much dong talk.
196
00:08:21,035 --> 00:08:23,219
That was a refusal, but there's
something we have planned.
197
00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:24,554
Yeah, we cannot end this yet.
198
00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:26,423
Oh.
199
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:28,425
Move it. Oh!
200
00:08:28,509 --> 00:08:30,893
Look, it's your step dad.
It's step dad.
201
00:08:30,977 --> 00:08:32,511
Oh, no!
202
00:08:34,438 --> 00:08:36,967
There's something we have
planned. - Yeah, we cannot end this yet.
203
00:08:37,051 --> 00:08:38,584
Oh.
204
00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:43,840
Oh, no, Murr!
Look, it's your step dad!
205
00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:47,243
Pete, Pete, Pete, Pete!
It's my step dad.
206
00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:49,779
Uh-oh, step dad.
Put him over your knee.
207
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:52,115
No, no, no, no, no.
208
00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:53,116
- Come here. Come over here.
- Okay.
209
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:54,384
You're getting spanked.
210
00:08:54,468 --> 00:08:56,052
Didn't I tell you
not to touch my stuff?
211
00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:57,721
- No, I'm sorry.
- Huh? Huh?
212
00:08:57,805 --> 00:09:00,456
Come on, boy. Bad, bad boy.
213
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,859
- I'm sorry, step dad.
- Step dad.
214
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,394
Pete,
how are you ignoring this?
215
00:09:04,612 --> 00:09:06,612
Pete, how are you ignoring this?
216
00:09:09,274 --> 00:09:10,191
Murr, bad news, by the way.
217
00:09:10,284 --> 00:09:11,735
You refused before, so you lost,
218
00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:13,603
So that whole step dad thing
was for nothing.
219
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:17,807
I'm gonna head inside and serve
your mother up some dong.
220
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,412
Murr and Sal
couldn't clean up their act,
221
00:09:25,507 --> 00:09:28,609
Making them first up
on the loser board.
222
00:09:28,694 --> 00:09:30,302
So, we know
you've got a potty mouth,
223
00:09:30,387 --> 00:09:31,955
So you know what you can
and cannot say, right,
224
00:09:32,039 --> 00:09:33,623
On television without bleeping?
225
00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:38,094
So, I mean, am I at some point
able to go like...
226
00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:41,497
"you mother****
Piece of **** Mother****"?
227
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:42,766
You know,
somebody's bothering me.
228
00:09:42,850 --> 00:09:44,679
We could ask. Okay.
229
00:09:44,764 --> 00:09:46,770
You know, normally, you can't
say **** ****
230
00:09:46,854 --> 00:09:51,174
**** ****
**** ****
231
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:52,376
So, like, for example,
if you said,
232
00:09:52,460 --> 00:09:54,644
"**** Horse ****"
mm-hmm.
233
00:09:54,728 --> 00:09:56,846
Some words would be bleeped,
others not.
234
00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:58,514
Because it's about the context,
right?
235
00:09:58,598 --> 00:09:59,783
Yes. Context. Yes.
236
00:09:59,867 --> 00:10:01,385
Alright. Well, thank you.
237
00:10:01,469 --> 00:10:03,387
Today, we're teaming up
at Jay suites,
238
00:10:03,471 --> 00:10:05,989
Work shopping a presentation
on ghouls and ghosts
239
00:10:06,073 --> 00:10:07,657
To focus-group participants.
240
00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:11,327
The scary part is our
presentations have been created
241
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:12,796
by the other guys.
242
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:14,530
At the end,
we'll ask the participants
243
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,466
To raise their hands
244
00:10:16,550 --> 00:10:19,735
If they think our presentation
is good to go.
245
00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:23,422
The team with the fewest hands
raised loses.
246
00:10:27,161 --> 00:10:30,546
So, guys,
this is something new today.
247
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:32,282
You may be asking who
248
00:10:32,366 --> 00:10:34,017
This handsome gentleman is
to my right.
249
00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:36,820
Max is my dear, dear friend.
He is our barber.
250
00:10:36,904 --> 00:10:39,089
But, I mean, now
we've been friends for a decade.
251
00:10:39,173 --> 00:10:40,890
He cuts my hair, Q's hair.
252
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:44,027
I never feel as pretty as I do
when I leave Max's shop.
253
00:10:44,111 --> 00:10:45,695
Thank you. Thank you so much.
254
00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,697
Alright, Max. Here we go.
255
00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:50,166
We are in the world
of the paranormal.
256
00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:51,567
Let's take you through it.
Max, you want to start off?
257
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,904
Yeah.
"The real life babadook:
258
00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:58,508
The wicked haunting
of colts neck, New Jersey."
259
00:10:58,592 --> 00:11:00,510
Alright,
here we go, here we go.
260
00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:02,446
Signs you got a 'dook.
261
00:11:03,731 --> 00:11:05,649
Door slams on their own.
262
00:11:05,733 --> 00:11:08,184
You've heard these common ones,
right?
263
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:10,520
Walls bleed sometimes.
You've seen it in movies.
264
00:11:10,604 --> 00:11:11,721
It's happened in real life.
265
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:13,657
But never blood. Sometimes...
266
00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:19,796
Sometimes smegma. Smegma.
267
00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,532
Uh, smegma.
268
00:11:22,616 --> 00:11:24,067
Moving on.
269
00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:28,538
The time the babadook
possessed my soul.
270
00:11:28,622 --> 00:11:31,675
I entered the szeluga house.
271
00:11:31,759 --> 00:11:37,481
The "dook," in turn, entered me
via my mouth.
272
00:11:37,565 --> 00:11:39,816
I felt myself die.
273
00:11:39,900 --> 00:11:42,018
I was possessed.
I was possessed.
274
00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:44,888
It came in right in my mouth.
I have a babadook in my mouth.
275
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:49,625
Hit.
276
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:53,897
Oil extract from a babadook
wards off evil spirits.
277
00:11:53,981 --> 00:11:55,031
Yep.
278
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:58,768
Hands stimulation
is the best procedure
279
00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:01,305
To extract the most 'dook oil.
280
00:12:01,389 --> 00:12:02,972
The best.
281
00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:05,308
You see where this is going?
I do.
282
00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,043
Gent...
283
00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:10,514
Gently...
284
00:12:10,598 --> 00:12:12,382
Look at Max.
Can't get it out.
285
00:12:12,466 --> 00:12:16,520
Gently massage that 'dook.
Get that oil.
286
00:12:16,604 --> 00:12:20,056
I will now rub
actual babadook oil
287
00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:24,260
On my partner's face
to protect his soul.
288
00:12:27,281 --> 00:12:28,665
I'm gonna get the 'dook
all over his face.
289
00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:31,000
Wait, wait.
290
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:34,003
Oh. Oh, my god.
291
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,139
Fresh from the 'dook.
292
00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:38,408
Oh, my god.
Now you got a dookie face.
293
00:12:38,492 --> 00:12:41,411
I jerked off a 'dook for that.
294
00:12:41,495 --> 00:12:43,413
No, no, no, no, no, no!
295
00:12:47,435 --> 00:12:49,285
I jerked... jerked...
296
00:12:52,372 --> 00:12:53,690
Look at these guys' face!
297
00:12:55,509 --> 00:12:56,826
Just by show of hands,
298
00:12:56,910 --> 00:12:58,494
Do any of you think
that the presentation
299
00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:01,431
Is ready to go right now,
by show of hands?
300
00:13:01,515 --> 00:13:03,233
- Okay.
- Oh!
301
00:13:03,317 --> 00:13:04,368
Yeah, yeah.
Don't worry about it.
302
00:13:04,452 --> 00:13:05,835
You did good. Thank you so much.
303
00:13:08,255 --> 00:13:09,839
How you doing, guys?
Welcome, welcome.
304
00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:12,576
We are paranormal enthusiasts.
305
00:13:12,660 --> 00:13:13,910
Alright.
306
00:13:13,994 --> 00:13:17,447
So, first,
"ghosts, goblins, and ghouls:
307
00:13:17,531 --> 00:13:20,516
Our experience
with paranormal beings."
308
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,986
Okay, types of spirits.
Here we go.
309
00:13:23,070 --> 00:13:25,855
Number one, ghost...
Female spirit.
310
00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:28,124
Number two.
Ghoul... male spirits.
311
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:30,594
Yes. Number three is...
312
00:13:30,678 --> 00:13:33,529
Gabaghoul...
Italian male spirit.
313
00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:35,131
The gabaghoul.
314
00:13:35,215 --> 00:13:36,866
Number four is...
315
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:40,203
A Ghoulmah. Yeah, a...
A Ghoulmah.
316
00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:44,941
A Ghoulmah is, of course,
an extramarital spirit.
317
00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:48,412
Okay.
318
00:13:48,496 --> 00:13:53,750
So, the question is,
are spirits in this room?
319
00:13:53,834 --> 00:13:55,351
In the top drawer,
we have something for you.
320
00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:56,420
Pull that out, Q.
321
00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:05,395
In top drawer.
We have something for you.
322
00:14:05,479 --> 00:14:07,864
Pull that out, Q.
323
00:14:11,552 --> 00:14:14,737
Okay. So this is what we call
a spirit finder.
324
00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:17,140
Really a stud finder,
so use it on the wall.
325
00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:18,475
Oh!
326
00:14:18,559 --> 00:14:19,810
You guys hearing that?
327
00:14:19,894 --> 00:14:24,080
- Pretty good?
- Oh!
328
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,817
That is a ghost for sure!
329
00:14:28,569 --> 00:14:29,702
Moving on.
330
00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:34,224
If you don't mind.
331
00:14:34,308 --> 00:14:36,893
I can't believe
they are still sitting there.
332
00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,961
If they oblige this...
333
00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:40,497
I'll collect them.
334
00:14:40,581 --> 00:14:42,833
Great, and...
Oh, wow.
335
00:14:42,917 --> 00:14:44,100
Here we go.
336
00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:45,636
They're actually getting them
to take their shoes off.
337
00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:49,239
Dude, that's crazy! I did
not think that would happen.
338
00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:52,108
Okay, thank you.
339
00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:54,044
Just by show of hands alone,
340
00:14:54,128 --> 00:14:56,379
If you think that
this presentation is ready
341
00:14:56,463 --> 00:14:58,781
To take out to the public,
342
00:14:58,865 --> 00:15:00,366
Please raise your hands
right now.
343
00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:05,388
Nah. Sorry, guys.
344
00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:06,656
I hear the spirits.
345
00:15:09,009 --> 00:15:11,461
Murr and Q got spooked
during this challenge,
346
00:15:11,545 --> 00:15:14,331
Making Murr tonight's big loser.
347
00:15:14,415 --> 00:15:16,933
Murr is our big loser.
And today, buddy,
348
00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:20,136
We have set up for you
a very special acting class
349
00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:22,472
Taught by the very special
David cross.
350
00:15:22,556 --> 00:15:24,140
- Okay.
- That's right. Now, James...
351
00:15:24,224 --> 00:15:28,144
Are you familiar with the
sense memory acting technique?
352
00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:29,746
- Sense?
- No.
353
00:15:29,830 --> 00:15:30,813
It's the acting technique
354
00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:33,349
Of experience
something firsthand for real
355
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,686
So that you can recall it later
in an actual scene.
356
00:15:35,770 --> 00:15:36,953
Okay. Yeah.
357
00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:41,091
And I got some rather advanced
acting experiences.
358
00:15:41,175 --> 00:15:42,559
This is way too vague.
359
00:15:42,643 --> 00:15:44,026
What do you think's
gonna happen?
360
00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:46,363
I feel like something's going
inside me at some point.
361
00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:49,232
Alright, so,
David's about to go in there
362
00:15:49,316 --> 00:15:51,501
And teach a class
on sense memory.
363
00:15:51,585 --> 00:15:54,170
Hi. I'm David cross,
and I'm gonna be teaching.
364
00:15:54,254 --> 00:15:56,306
What we're gonna utilize
is sense memory.
365
00:15:56,390 --> 00:15:58,975
Okay. Let's do a scene.
366
00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,911
We dug coal together.
367
00:16:00,995 --> 00:16:01,978
Murr... throw your hand up
right now, Murr.
368
00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:02,979
Throw your hand up right now.
369
00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:04,781
Murr, this is you, buddy.
370
00:16:04,865 --> 00:16:06,717
It's all about sense memory,
baby.
371
00:16:06,801 --> 00:16:08,919
You've got black lung, okay?
372
00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:13,924
So, this one
is a spoonful of cinnamon.
373
00:16:14,008 --> 00:16:16,259
Boyd succumbs
to his black lung
374
00:16:16,343 --> 00:16:18,929
And must say farewell
to his best friend.
375
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:21,932
I just put it on my tongue?
376
00:16:22,016 --> 00:16:24,267
Yeah. And just talk with it
in the scene.
377
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:27,069
This is what it's like
to have black lung.
378
00:16:27,153 --> 00:16:28,871
How do I not breathe
when I'm talking?
379
00:16:28,955 --> 00:16:31,007
Well, that's on you. Okay.
380
00:16:34,961 --> 00:16:36,279
There you go, Murr.
381
00:16:37,832 --> 00:16:39,631
Murr... look at Murr.
382
00:16:41,836 --> 00:16:43,153
Okay, great.
383
00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:48,891
Okay, here we go.
384
00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:50,560
Right, so that's... use it.
385
00:16:50,644 --> 00:16:53,363
Use it, use it, use it.
386
00:16:53,447 --> 00:16:55,698
Don't you give up on me now,
Boyd.
387
00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:58,635
You've been digging coal to...
388
00:16:58,719 --> 00:17:00,236
You're gonna do it again!
389
00:17:02,656 --> 00:17:04,441
Slow down.
390
00:17:04,525 --> 00:17:06,042
Do his voice!
391
00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:07,710
You got to enunciate, though.
I know...
392
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:09,179
I'm trying, Dave cross!
393
00:17:11,398 --> 00:17:14,117
I definitely have
black lung, buddy.
394
00:17:14,201 --> 00:17:15,918
So much black lung.
395
00:17:16,002 --> 00:17:16,987
Whoa, that looks awful.
396
00:17:17,071 --> 00:17:19,189
Okay, great. Very good.
397
00:17:19,273 --> 00:17:20,457
Wow.
398
00:17:20,541 --> 00:17:23,259
So, the next sense memory
we got lined up,
399
00:17:23,343 --> 00:17:25,996
This is a little bit
more advanced.
400
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:27,263
Murr... throw your hand up
right now, Murr.
401
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:28,665
It's basically...
402
00:17:28,749 --> 00:17:30,601
Yeah?
I'll do it.
403
00:17:30,685 --> 00:17:32,335
You said advanced. I'm in.
404
00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:34,270
Okay. Come on up, James.
405
00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:36,006
And I need two more.
406
00:17:36,090 --> 00:17:37,940
Bridget and Tina.
407
00:17:38,024 --> 00:17:40,410
So that's Bridget and Tina.
They're with us.
408
00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:41,944
This is called
"the trail."
409
00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:44,547
First scene, it's cannibalism.
410
00:17:45,766 --> 00:17:48,418
You're going to be
portraying somebody
411
00:17:48,502 --> 00:17:51,154
That has to eat
another human being.
412
00:17:51,238 --> 00:17:55,758
So, this one is bull testicle,
and...
413
00:17:57,711 --> 00:17:59,578
This is a bull testicle.
414
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:03,500
In the rockies
during the harsh winter,
415
00:18:03,584 --> 00:18:05,702
The settlers turned
to cannibalism to survive.
416
00:18:05,786 --> 00:18:09,239
Alright, James, you're the one
who wanted the advanced, okay?
417
00:18:09,323 --> 00:18:10,640
Yeah. Alright.
418
00:18:10,724 --> 00:18:13,309
Just shove those bull balls
into your mouth, babe.
419
00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:15,045
Okay. There you go. Great.
420
00:18:15,129 --> 00:18:17,714
I know it seems gross. Use that.
421
00:18:17,798 --> 00:18:20,250
That is not a bull testicle.
That is...
422
00:18:20,334 --> 00:18:23,520
A real testicle.
That's a real testicle.
423
00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:27,590
Alright? Like a human.
424
00:18:27,674 --> 00:18:29,726
That's what you got to use.
Okay?
425
00:18:29,810 --> 00:18:31,127
Okay. Here we go.
426
00:18:31,211 --> 00:18:33,530
Oh!
427
00:18:33,614 --> 00:18:34,998
Action.
428
00:18:35,082 --> 00:18:37,534
You need strength.
429
00:18:37,618 --> 00:18:39,802
We will not consume
the flesh of another.
430
00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:42,004
It's against god.
Then you're already dead.
431
00:18:42,088 --> 00:18:44,541
John chomps down
the piece of flesh defiantly.
432
00:18:44,625 --> 00:18:47,544
Defiantly.
433
00:18:47,628 --> 00:18:50,080
Oh, here we go.
And bite that nut.
434
00:18:50,164 --> 00:18:52,815
Bite that nut. Bite.
435
00:18:52,899 --> 00:18:55,017
Bite that nut.
436
00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:56,368
Bite that nut.
437
00:18:57,904 --> 00:18:59,155
Eat it, Murr. Eat it!
438
00:19:01,375 --> 00:19:02,492
Oh.
439
00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:06,897
Oh! Oh, my god!
440
00:19:06,981 --> 00:19:08,699
You got to rip it off.
This is visceral.
441
00:19:08,783 --> 00:19:11,501
This is... use it. Come on, now.
442
00:19:11,585 --> 00:19:13,103
Let's go.
443
00:19:13,187 --> 00:19:15,187
- I got...
- Alright.
444
00:19:16,457 --> 00:19:20,043
If you don't...
445
00:19:20,127 --> 00:19:22,112
Oh, my god, it's disgusting.
It's stringy.
446
00:19:22,196 --> 00:19:23,780
Well, that was...
It was... okay.
447
00:19:23,864 --> 00:19:25,115
Since he didn't eat that one,
448
00:19:25,199 --> 00:19:26,316
Maybe you keep him onstage,
David.
449
00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,985
James, I'm gonna have you stay.
450
00:19:29,069 --> 00:19:32,522
"Crimson fields"...
This is also advanced.
451
00:19:32,606 --> 00:19:33,990
This is where
it turns up a notch.
452
00:19:34,074 --> 00:19:35,525
Yeah.
This is turning it up a notch.
453
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:36,927
This is gonna be a ghost pepper.
454
00:19:37,011 --> 00:19:38,461
James, put this glove on.
455
00:19:38,545 --> 00:19:40,931
What is... what is ghost pepper?
456
00:19:41,015 --> 00:19:42,399
It's, like,
one of the hottest peppers.
457
00:19:42,483 --> 00:19:43,600
Yeah, it's a very hot pepper.
458
00:19:43,684 --> 00:19:45,067
He doesn't know what's coming.
459
00:19:45,151 --> 00:19:46,202
Oh, no.
460
00:19:46,286 --> 00:19:48,004
Only touch it
with the gloved hand, okay?
461
00:19:48,088 --> 00:19:51,141
Do you understand?
This is serious, okay?
462
00:19:51,225 --> 00:19:54,277
And you need to eat this.
463
00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:55,412
Take a bite out of it?
464
00:19:55,496 --> 00:19:57,680
Like, eat the pepper. Yeah.
465
00:19:57,764 --> 00:20:01,217
This is about as sense memory
as it gets, okay?
466
00:20:01,301 --> 00:20:04,220
Is this dangerous?
It's up there.
467
00:20:07,174 --> 00:20:08,759
You're gonna be fine.
We got some water.
468
00:20:08,843 --> 00:20:10,293
Can we get some water for him?
469
00:20:10,377 --> 00:20:12,028
So when do I do this?
470
00:20:12,112 --> 00:20:13,363
Right now, at the beginning. Oh.
471
00:20:13,447 --> 00:20:14,831
And then we'll start the scene.
Okay.
472
00:20:14,915 --> 00:20:17,434
Okay, ready?
473
00:20:17,518 --> 00:20:20,570
Lord rodanthe realizes
he's been mortally poisoned.
474
00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:21,638
Here we go!
475
00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:23,774
Oh, god. Are we ready?
476
00:20:23,858 --> 00:20:25,976
This one is gonna be
extra lethal.
477
00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:29,495
- Oh!
- Oh, my god. Oh, my god.
478
00:20:31,264 --> 00:20:32,515
This is gonna be
a ghost pepper.
479
00:20:32,599 --> 00:20:33,850
Here we go.
480
00:20:33,934 --> 00:20:35,786
Oh, god. Are we ready?
481
00:20:35,870 --> 00:20:37,854
This one is gonna be
extra lethal.
482
00:20:37,938 --> 00:20:39,656
Okay, you've been poisoned.
483
00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:41,391
Oh, trust me,
you're never gonna forget this.
484
00:20:45,079 --> 00:20:46,729
Again, James, you volunteered.
485
00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:50,733
Oh! Alright, great.
486
00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:52,602
Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Mm!
487
00:20:52,686 --> 00:20:54,404
Oh, my god. Okay.
488
00:20:54,488 --> 00:20:57,073
Oh! Here we go.
489
00:20:57,157 --> 00:20:58,809
My dear...
490
00:20:58,893 --> 00:20:59,810
...You must not leave me here
491
00:20:59,894 --> 00:21:01,478
To fend for myself
amongst the crows.
492
00:21:01,562 --> 00:21:04,614
Curse that viper,
lord red stone.
493
00:21:04,698 --> 00:21:06,617
I spit on his name. Ooh!
494
00:21:06,701 --> 00:21:10,620
And I-I fear it was my...
495
00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:14,290
Use it, use it.
You've been poisoned.
496
00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:16,559
- I fear...
- Oh, my god. I can't.
497
00:21:16,643 --> 00:21:18,228
I fear it was, my darling,
498
00:21:18,312 --> 00:21:20,363
That blackguard
robed in men's dress.
499
00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:21,631
Oh, my god.
500
00:21:21,715 --> 00:21:23,099
Is he gonna die?
501
00:21:23,183 --> 00:21:24,767
He does look poisoned.
502
00:21:30,056 --> 00:21:33,109
I fear not, my love.
503
00:21:37,664 --> 00:21:39,982
I wish for your...
504
00:21:40,066 --> 00:21:41,384
Okay. Don't use it all at once.
505
00:21:41,468 --> 00:21:42,519
Oh, my god. Pace it out.
506
00:21:45,940 --> 00:21:48,791
Grieve not, my darling,
507
00:21:48,875 --> 00:21:52,863
For I leave this realm
without fear of pain.
508
00:21:56,016 --> 00:21:58,801
Seasonal... season...
509
00:21:58,885 --> 00:22:00,403
That was awesome. Wow!
510
00:22:00,487 --> 00:22:03,473
Am I killing it or what?
511
00:22:03,557 --> 00:22:05,475
Murray. Murray, you're a god!
512
00:22:05,559 --> 00:22:08,010
I was the best of the class.
513
00:22:09,696 --> 00:22:10,681
This is the last one.
514
00:22:10,765 --> 00:22:13,550
David, when the student
is ready, the master appears.
515
00:22:13,634 --> 00:22:15,285
Here you go to be in scenes.
516
00:22:15,369 --> 00:22:18,955
We're gonna elevate this.
So, you do this.
517
00:22:19,039 --> 00:22:20,156
What's that?
518
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:22,559
We're gonna superglue
both fingers together.
519
00:22:22,643 --> 00:22:23,826
What's that?
520
00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:27,230
I'm just gonna krazy glue
my fingers
521
00:22:27,314 --> 00:22:28,831
Interlocking right now?
522
00:22:28,915 --> 00:22:30,100
What's the words?
What do we say?
523
00:22:30,184 --> 00:22:32,703
- Use it. Use it.
- Use it.
524
00:22:32,787 --> 00:22:35,505
Look at Murr. He's starting
to get real beat down, man.
525
00:22:35,589 --> 00:22:36,773
Dave can't find his wallet
526
00:22:36,857 --> 00:22:40,176
While out to dinner
with his fianceé.
527
00:22:40,260 --> 00:22:41,378
Are your hands stuck together,
bitch?
528
00:22:42,929 --> 00:22:45,448
This is how we send Murray home
packing right now.
529
00:22:45,532 --> 00:22:46,917
- Is this your wallet?
- Yes, sir.
530
00:22:47,001 --> 00:22:49,635
Okay. We take this and...
531
00:22:50,805 --> 00:22:51,922
No, no.
532
00:22:52,006 --> 00:22:55,258
Oh, my god! Oh, my god!
533
00:22:55,342 --> 00:22:58,595
Oh, my god!
534
00:22:58,679 --> 00:22:59,529
You can't pay.
That sucks, right?
535
00:22:59,613 --> 00:23:01,732
I can't use it now.
536
00:23:01,816 --> 00:23:04,334
You just cut
my real credit cards.
537
00:23:04,418 --> 00:23:05,602
I know. Sit. Let's use it.
538
00:23:05,686 --> 00:23:07,203
Feel it, feel it, feel it.
Ready?
539
00:23:07,287 --> 00:23:09,139
- Yes.
- I can't believe what just happened.
540
00:23:09,223 --> 00:23:11,874
Dave reaches for his wallet,
pats his pants, shirt pocket,
541
00:23:11,958 --> 00:23:12,943
Can't find nothing but lint.
542
00:23:13,027 --> 00:23:13,944
Shoot! What?
543
00:23:14,028 --> 00:23:17,147
I don't have my wallet. Again?
544
00:23:17,231 --> 00:23:19,082
This is all my fault!
545
00:23:19,166 --> 00:23:20,951
Of course it's your fault.
Who else's fault would it be?
546
00:23:21,035 --> 00:23:22,552
Let's see what we got.
547
00:23:25,039 --> 00:23:26,356
Look at the... look at them.
548
00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:28,474
You have to use this.
You cannot cut...
549
00:23:28,559 --> 00:23:30,093
I know. I get it.
Okay, but we can cut that one.
550
00:23:30,177 --> 00:23:32,095
No, no, no, no, no!
That's my debit.
551
00:23:33,647 --> 00:23:35,298
We didn't even tell him
to do it.
552
00:23:35,382 --> 00:23:36,366
Dave's going rogue.
553
00:23:36,450 --> 00:23:38,568
You can't pay. Let's go.
Let's do the scene.
554
00:23:38,652 --> 00:23:39,770
Yes, let's do it!
555
00:23:39,854 --> 00:23:41,638
Oh, shoot! What?
556
00:23:41,722 --> 00:23:43,306
I don't have my wallet!
557
00:23:43,390 --> 00:23:44,736
What's wrong with your hands?
558
00:23:47,928 --> 00:23:49,512
Yes!
559
00:23:49,596 --> 00:23:52,115
And scene.
560
00:23:52,199 --> 00:23:55,786
- Oh, my god.
- Jesus Christ, that was awesome.
561
00:23:55,870 --> 00:23:57,654
Thank you.
562
00:23:57,738 --> 00:23:59,389
Alright, David.
Great job, buddy.
563
00:23:59,473 --> 00:24:01,858
Now take your seat, James.
Take your seat.
564
00:24:01,942 --> 00:24:02,942
Nailed it.
39571
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.