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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:21,500 --> 00:00:22,500 Nachos rule. 2 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:23,880 They rule. 3 00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:25,160 Yeah. 4 00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:36,670 Whoa, check it out. 5 00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:41,910 Stupid dog. 6 00:00:46,270 --> 00:00:50,870 I heard that if you, like, don't act scared, they won't attack you. 7 00:00:52,850 --> 00:00:53,850 How do you do that? 8 00:01:21,130 --> 00:01:22,130 Do I care? 9 00:01:23,450 --> 00:01:24,450 No. 10 00:01:25,430 --> 00:01:31,030 I don't care. No, I just don't care. Hey, buddy. 11 00:01:38,550 --> 00:01:39,550 Whoa. 12 00:01:42,550 --> 00:01:43,550 Penguin. 13 00:01:44,590 --> 00:01:49,190 You know it sounds funny, but I just can't stand the pain. 14 00:01:50,030 --> 00:01:51,150 That doesn't sound funny. 15 00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:55,570 Girl, I'm leaving you tomorrow. That's pretty hot. 16 00:01:56,150 --> 00:01:57,150 Yeah. 17 00:01:57,410 --> 00:01:58,410 Wow. 18 00:01:59,330 --> 00:02:02,270 They must have just did it, and now she's, like, fixing herself up. 19 00:02:02,670 --> 00:02:03,670 Yeah. 20 00:02:03,810 --> 00:02:06,550 After I do it, I like to, you know, comb my hair, and then, like, you know, 21 00:02:06,550 --> 00:02:08,250 then, like, flush the toilet and stuff. 22 00:02:16,110 --> 00:02:17,590 You monkey spank. 23 00:02:27,290 --> 00:02:29,190 What's so great about Sunday morning? 24 00:02:30,330 --> 00:02:31,330 Yeah, yeah. 25 00:02:31,370 --> 00:02:32,630 Sunday morning sucks. 26 00:02:33,330 --> 00:02:34,330 Yeah. 27 00:02:35,410 --> 00:02:37,090 Afternoon is no picnic either. 28 00:02:37,770 --> 00:02:38,930 You know what really sucks? 29 00:02:39,210 --> 00:02:40,210 It's like evening. 30 00:02:40,810 --> 00:02:41,810 Yeah. 31 00:02:42,110 --> 00:02:43,870 In fact, the whole day sucks. 32 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:47,000 Every single day sucks. 33 00:02:48,540 --> 00:02:54,440 I was just thinking about those penguins. 34 00:02:55,660 --> 00:02:56,660 Oh, yeah? 35 00:02:57,140 --> 00:02:58,140 So? 36 00:02:58,660 --> 00:03:00,420 I don't know. I was just thinking about them. 37 00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:12,940 Do you want to touch his bone? 38 00:03:15,310 --> 00:03:16,310 Touch it. 39 00:03:20,410 --> 00:03:22,950 Cool. Can you film at the mouth? 40 00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:25,090 Check this out. 41 00:03:34,750 --> 00:03:36,750 Eason, is it contagious? 42 00:03:37,370 --> 00:03:39,290 No, I disinfected it. 43 00:03:45,390 --> 00:03:46,870 Sports drinks have nutrients. 44 00:03:50,690 --> 00:03:52,430 Listen up, morons. 45 00:03:52,790 --> 00:03:58,330 Some short -sighted federal appeals judge says I can't use this on you. But 46 00:03:58,330 --> 00:04:04,270 remember this. In this classroom, I am the judge, the jury, and the jailer. 47 00:04:05,890 --> 00:04:07,490 Does it hurt when I do this? 48 00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:13,250 That was cool. 49 00:04:15,340 --> 00:04:16,440 gentlemen have a problem? 50 00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:22,180 Do you wish to enlighten the class as to what is festering on your leg, Beavis? 51 00:04:22,860 --> 00:04:23,860 Dog bite. 52 00:04:25,420 --> 00:04:28,440 Well, I thought you looked rabid, boy. 53 00:04:28,700 --> 00:04:29,980 Now listen close. 54 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:34,760 Get the hell out of my classroom before you infect anyone else with your 55 00:04:34,760 --> 00:04:37,220 sickness. You stink of death. 56 00:04:38,120 --> 00:04:41,780 Butthead, this man requires immediate medical attention. 57 00:04:42,180 --> 00:04:46,400 Uh... Hospital butthead! Head on the double! Yes! 58 00:04:49,020 --> 00:04:51,800 The chances are very, very good that this is a repeat. 59 00:04:52,220 --> 00:04:53,240 Stick around anyway. 60 00:04:54,140 --> 00:04:55,900 Beavis and the brown -haired guy will be right back. 61 00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:08,100 Can I help you? 62 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,600 Uh, he's got, like, rabies or something. 63 00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:15,680 I see. 64 00:05:16,260 --> 00:05:17,480 What's your name? 65 00:05:17,940 --> 00:05:19,840 Uh, last name is Munch. 66 00:05:21,060 --> 00:05:22,780 First name is Rodney. 67 00:05:23,980 --> 00:05:26,520 Rod Munch. 68 00:05:29,420 --> 00:05:30,800 Rod Munch. 69 00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:39,480 Now, 70 00:05:39,980 --> 00:05:42,040 which one of you fellas is Rod Munch? 71 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:44,830 Uh. He is. 72 00:05:45,650 --> 00:05:46,650 He's Rod. 73 00:05:50,430 --> 00:05:55,330 So, Rod, I understand you got bit by a dog. 74 00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:59,930 Well, don't be scared, because look, a dog bit my thumb off once too, Rod. 75 00:06:02,610 --> 00:06:03,610 You're stupid. 76 00:06:04,890 --> 00:06:10,150 Now, Rod, I don't suppose you brought the animal with you? 77 00:06:10,550 --> 00:06:13,690 Uh, he wasn't, like, very friendly. 78 00:06:14,790 --> 00:06:16,570 Yeah, he doesn't like me. 79 00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:19,510 Well, we'll have to find him anyway. 80 00:06:19,870 --> 00:06:23,490 In a suspected case of rabies, the animal has to be destroyed, of course. 81 00:06:23,790 --> 00:06:27,650 And to check for presence of the disease, we cut off the head and dissect 82 00:06:27,650 --> 00:06:30,730 brain. Whoa, that's cool. 83 00:06:32,690 --> 00:06:33,690 Actually, yes. 84 00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:34,950 It is kind of cool. 85 00:06:35,510 --> 00:06:38,270 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, butthead, let's go find that dog. 86 00:06:40,250 --> 00:06:41,870 Not so fast, Rod. 87 00:06:42,380 --> 00:06:43,940 Let's talk about your symptoms first. 88 00:06:44,220 --> 00:06:47,520 Any dizziness, nausea, fever, any convulsions? 89 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:48,880 Yeah, yeah. 90 00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:50,880 No more than usual, though. 91 00:06:51,780 --> 00:06:54,540 Hmm. So far, nothing checks out. 92 00:06:55,060 --> 00:06:56,180 Maybe you were lucky. 93 00:06:56,540 --> 00:06:58,840 Uh, you mean like no decrepitation? 94 00:07:03,060 --> 00:07:04,640 I've got rabies. 95 00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,060 Okay. 96 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:10,620 I'll call the police about the dog. 97 00:07:11,050 --> 00:07:12,710 But first, we'd better start treatment. 98 00:07:12,970 --> 00:07:14,110 Do they have to get a shot? 99 00:07:16,850 --> 00:07:17,850 No. 100 00:07:18,250 --> 00:07:19,250 Cool. 101 00:07:19,670 --> 00:07:21,610 You have to get 18 of them, Rod. 102 00:07:21,890 --> 00:07:22,890 Yes. 103 00:07:23,470 --> 00:07:24,810 In the stomach. 104 00:07:25,150 --> 00:07:26,150 Cool. 105 00:07:31,830 --> 00:07:32,830 This sucks. 106 00:08:02,700 --> 00:08:04,460 First, it causes your hair to turn red. 107 00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:06,360 Then your butt falls off. 108 00:08:09,940 --> 00:08:10,980 Hey, Beaver. 109 00:08:11,460 --> 00:08:12,840 Have you ever had an operation? 110 00:08:13,380 --> 00:08:17,400 Yeah. I had my tonsils removed once. 111 00:08:18,700 --> 00:08:19,700 Whoa. 112 00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:22,080 That means you were neutered, dude. 113 00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:23,960 No way. 114 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:27,280 Really? Dude, that's what they do when they remove your testicles. 115 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:29,920 Cool. 116 00:08:30,430 --> 00:08:33,510 I was thinking of having my mucus membranes removed. 117 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,450 That way you, like, never get a runny nose. 118 00:08:37,830 --> 00:08:38,830 Yeah. 119 00:08:39,929 --> 00:08:43,870 The mucus membranes are the part of your brain that makes you, like, remember 120 00:08:43,870 --> 00:08:44,870 mucus. 121 00:08:45,370 --> 00:08:49,230 So, like, if you have them removed, you'll just forget to blow your nose all 122 00:08:49,230 --> 00:08:50,230 time. 123 00:08:50,350 --> 00:08:52,370 That would be pretty cool. 124 00:08:54,410 --> 00:08:57,390 Let's go get the pliers and remove our mucus membranes. 125 00:09:01,270 --> 00:09:05,630 The good news about rabies is that treating it no longer means a series of 126 00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:08,250 painful injections into the solar plexus. 127 00:09:08,470 --> 00:09:12,590 New vaccines require only five simple shots in the arm. 128 00:09:14,570 --> 00:09:15,710 Hey, Beaver. 129 00:09:16,170 --> 00:09:18,650 How come that stupid doctor didn't know that? 130 00:09:20,150 --> 00:09:22,330 Maybe he doesn't watch TV. 131 00:09:28,310 --> 00:09:29,310 Rod Munch, huh? 132 00:09:31,970 --> 00:09:32,970 Whoa, that's cool. 133 00:09:33,890 --> 00:09:34,890 I can do that. 134 00:09:36,990 --> 00:09:38,650 Come on, buddy, you do that all the time. 135 00:09:41,030 --> 00:09:42,030 Pizza, 136 00:09:42,130 --> 00:09:48,690 pizza? That's what he said, buddy. He said pizza, pizza. 137 00:09:49,350 --> 00:09:50,470 Oh, yeah. 138 00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:05,340 These guys are cool because they're, like, pissed off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 139 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:07,820 They're cool because they're, like, pissed off. 140 00:10:08,180 --> 00:10:11,560 Damn it, Beavis. How come you always repeat everything I say? 141 00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:14,260 Why do you do that? 142 00:10:14,540 --> 00:10:15,740 Yeah, hey, why do you do that? 143 00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:20,160 Beavis, do you repeat what I say one more time or I'm going to kick your ass. 144 00:10:21,100 --> 00:10:22,200 I'm going to kick your ass. 145 00:10:22,560 --> 00:10:25,740 You did it again, Beavis. You did it again, Beavis. 146 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:32,000 I 147 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:47,760 like 148 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:48,760 band grease. 149 00:10:50,170 --> 00:10:51,230 Creaming is cool. 150 00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:52,550 Yeah, yeah. 151 00:10:57,230 --> 00:10:58,650 Rock on, Viva. 9698