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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:20,400 Whoa! 2 00:00:22,340 --> 00:00:24,460 Think of the things we could do with this! 3 00:00:29,769 --> 00:00:33,710 Boys, I can give you a real good deal on that there bushwhacker. 4 00:00:37,830 --> 00:00:38,830 Bushwhackers. 5 00:00:42,070 --> 00:00:43,670 Just a second, boys. 6 00:00:47,310 --> 00:00:48,950 Hello. Speaking. 7 00:00:49,790 --> 00:00:51,350 Hey, Tom, this is Bill. 8 00:00:51,590 --> 00:00:56,630 I need a favor. The wife's colon is kicking up again, and I got to take her 9 00:00:56,630 --> 00:00:57,569 the hospital. 10 00:00:57,570 --> 00:00:58,670 Can you come down? 11 00:01:01,169 --> 00:01:05,810 Well, Bill, I wish I could, but you see, I got this here yard sale going on. 12 00:01:05,970 --> 00:01:10,510 Well, I guess 13 00:01:10,510 --> 00:01:16,510 I could do it. 14 00:01:19,670 --> 00:01:23,410 Say, boys, could I get you to watch my yard sale for a while? 15 00:01:23,930 --> 00:01:27,470 One of you could be selling while the other one starts moving things inside. 16 00:01:28,690 --> 00:01:29,690 Uh... No. 17 00:01:31,820 --> 00:01:33,120 Well, I'll tell you what. 18 00:01:33,460 --> 00:01:36,980 I'll give you 10 % of what you sell, and I'll even throw in that there 19 00:01:36,980 --> 00:01:39,500 bushwhacker. Uh, okay. 20 00:01:40,860 --> 00:01:41,860 Cool. 21 00:01:46,700 --> 00:01:49,100 Hey, that chick just spat, butthead. Yeah. 22 00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:51,860 That rules. 23 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:56,940 Yeah, it's pretty cool, but I don't know if I'd want a chick to spit, you know? 24 00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:58,810 Kind of disgusting on a chick. 25 00:01:59,010 --> 00:02:02,310 What do you think happens when you make out with a chick, Viva? 26 00:02:02,690 --> 00:02:05,390 It's like you get all her spit in your mouth and stuff. 27 00:02:06,130 --> 00:02:07,130 Oh, really? 28 00:02:08,910 --> 00:02:09,910 That's sickening. 29 00:02:10,350 --> 00:02:11,550 You dumbass. 30 00:02:13,830 --> 00:02:14,830 Whoa. 31 00:02:15,410 --> 00:02:18,350 This chick, like, kind of gives me a special feeling. 32 00:02:20,090 --> 00:02:23,090 I'd do it with her. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, I know. So would I. 33 00:02:24,170 --> 00:02:26,170 I'd do it with a lot of chicks on TV. So what? 34 00:02:27,180 --> 00:02:30,000 This is never going to happen, and I keep seeing them. They're making me 35 00:02:30,580 --> 00:02:31,740 Settle down, Beva. 36 00:02:32,380 --> 00:02:33,380 Damn it. 37 00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:38,280 Ooh, she's kind of hot. Yeah, yeah, I know. So what? So what? 38 00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:41,880 Ooh, she looks good there. 39 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:43,019 Yeah, yeah. 40 00:02:43,020 --> 00:02:44,780 See? Damn it. 41 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:49,960 I see him, I get a boner, and then nothing happens. 42 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:54,800 You need to settle down, Beaver. I know. See, see, there, there. Whoa, look, 43 00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:55,840 she's naked. 44 00:02:57,220 --> 00:02:58,700 She's fuck naked. 45 00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:02,000 Yeah. And she looks pretty good naked. 46 00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:03,360 Yeah. 47 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,220 Yeah. Yeah, now we're getting some more. 48 00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,840 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 49 00:03:09,180 --> 00:03:10,180 Ooh. Yeah. 50 00:03:10,580 --> 00:03:11,580 Yeah. 51 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:13,320 Ugh. 52 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:14,760 That's got to hurt. 53 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:22,040 Remember that time you got all sunburned and then your skin peeled and you, 54 00:03:22,060 --> 00:03:24,700 like, pulled it off and brought it to school and showed everybody? 55 00:03:25,020 --> 00:03:26,020 Oh, yeah. 56 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:29,560 That kind of reminds me of the time I was, like, trying to warm up my nads in 57 00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:30,560 the microwave. 58 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:35,860 So, like, how do you just put your nads in the microwave and not your schlong? 59 00:03:36,020 --> 00:03:39,460 Well, here, I'll show you. You kind of, like, stand up like this. 60 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:44,860 Sit down, Beavis. I don't want to see how you did it. Well, you ask. 61 00:03:50,540 --> 00:03:53,820 Uh, are you gonna buy something or just touch everything? 62 00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:59,380 Well, I'm looking for a gift for our church rectory. 63 00:03:59,660 --> 00:04:02,180 Uh, did you say rectum? 64 00:04:03,940 --> 00:04:06,660 Oh, what a precious manger. 65 00:04:07,020 --> 00:04:09,020 The pastor will love this. 66 00:04:09,740 --> 00:04:11,640 But where's the baby Jesus? 67 00:04:12,100 --> 00:04:15,200 Uh, he's like ten bucks extra. 68 00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:17,839 Charging money for the baby Jesus. 69 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:19,640 That's sacrilege. 70 00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:21,680 He's naked. 71 00:04:21,860 --> 00:04:25,020 You can tell Tom Anderson he's going to hell for this. 72 00:04:25,260 --> 00:04:26,260 Whoa. 73 00:04:27,020 --> 00:04:28,140 Okay, I'll tell him. 74 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:30,920 Hey, 75 00:04:31,180 --> 00:04:32,179 buddy, check it out. 76 00:04:32,180 --> 00:04:33,920 He's got, like, cooler stuff inside. 77 00:04:39,160 --> 00:04:41,640 Yeah. It even gets porno. 78 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:43,760 No extra charge, sir. 79 00:04:44,500 --> 00:04:45,760 How much did you say you wanted? 80 00:04:46,820 --> 00:04:49,180 Uh, how much do you want to spend? 81 00:04:50,280 --> 00:04:53,860 Well, I've only got $8 on me, but I could write you a check. 82 00:04:54,100 --> 00:05:00,020 Uh, we only take cash, but, uh, it just happens to be $8. 83 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:06,320 Whoa. 84 00:05:10,340 --> 00:05:11,460 Did you see that? 85 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,040 I took all of the money. 86 00:05:14,140 --> 00:05:15,740 What a dumbass. 87 00:05:17,020 --> 00:05:18,020 Yeah. 88 00:05:18,740 --> 00:05:19,740 Dumbass. 89 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,220 How you doing, ma 'am? 90 00:05:26,740 --> 00:05:28,060 Excuse me, young man. 91 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:30,640 Um, what's the price on these dishes? 92 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:32,840 Um, five bucks. 93 00:05:33,140 --> 00:05:34,660 Yeah, five bucks. 94 00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:36,820 But this looks like fine china. 95 00:05:37,140 --> 00:05:39,180 Um, five bucks. Take it or leave it. 96 00:05:39,980 --> 00:05:40,980 Uh. 97 00:05:41,370 --> 00:05:43,130 This table is like $20. 98 00:05:43,950 --> 00:05:45,590 Hey, what about the four chairs? 99 00:05:46,350 --> 00:05:47,350 They're eight. 100 00:05:47,970 --> 00:05:49,270 How much for the set? 101 00:05:52,470 --> 00:05:53,770 Fifteen. Here you go. 102 00:05:55,270 --> 00:05:56,370 Hey, Beavis. 103 00:05:56,610 --> 00:05:58,890 I'm like ripping these people off. 104 00:05:59,190 --> 00:06:00,310 Yeah, me too. 105 00:06:01,990 --> 00:06:07,390 They told me I'd be in the VA hospital for a week. Hell. 106 00:06:07,900 --> 00:06:09,700 I was there for nearly nine months. 107 00:06:10,020 --> 00:06:14,380 They took up my intestines, my bladder, my kidney, and part of my organ. 108 00:06:14,680 --> 00:06:19,960 Oh, you should have seen it. Well, that's some tough luck, Sarge. I wish 109 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:23,840 was something I could do. Well, how about pouring me a shot of whiskey? I 110 00:06:23,840 --> 00:06:25,980 the pain, you know? I just want to numb the pain. 111 00:06:26,340 --> 00:06:27,340 All right. 112 00:06:28,780 --> 00:06:31,600 Well, that'll be two big ones. I'll put it on my tab. 113 00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:33,480 I'm good for it, you know. 114 00:06:33,940 --> 00:06:35,300 Sorry, buddy. No can do. 115 00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:38,440 We got something around here called a code of honor. 116 00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:40,540 Huh, a Purple Heart from Korea. 117 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:42,620 You gotta be wounded to get one of these. 118 00:06:43,140 --> 00:06:44,200 Oh, yeah, yeah. 119 00:06:44,460 --> 00:06:46,060 I was shot in the butt. 120 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,000 Five bucks. 121 00:06:51,520 --> 00:06:53,100 I've seen this video before. 122 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:54,520 It's fucked. 123 00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:59,180 Wow. Now I'm just thinking the same thing and then you said it. You must, 124 00:06:59,220 --> 00:07:00,480 read minds or something. 125 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:03,680 Yeah, I can do that. 126 00:07:04,740 --> 00:07:08,060 Have like a E -S -P -N. 127 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:10,080 Whoa, really? 128 00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:11,700 That's cool. 129 00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:13,400 Yeah. 130 00:07:13,980 --> 00:07:17,760 I knew you were going to say that. What am I going to say next? 131 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,460 You're going to say, yeah. 132 00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:23,840 Yeah. 133 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:25,660 Wow, you did it again. 134 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:27,240 That's cool. 135 00:07:27,700 --> 00:07:29,440 I knew you were going to say that, too. 136 00:07:32,140 --> 00:07:33,560 Okay, let's try it one more time. 137 00:07:34,220 --> 00:07:35,220 Okay, I'm gonna think about this. 138 00:07:36,260 --> 00:07:37,420 Uh, okay. 139 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:41,700 Um... Damn it, Beavis! 140 00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:46,320 Don't ever think about that again. 141 00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:50,020 Wow, this is really cool. Okay, let me do it now. 142 00:07:50,260 --> 00:07:51,520 Can you think of something? 143 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:53,660 Uh, okay. 144 00:07:56,880 --> 00:08:00,020 I'm thinking about... Is it some flies? 145 00:08:00,900 --> 00:08:01,900 No. 146 00:08:03,950 --> 00:08:05,410 Is it a suitcase of some kind? 147 00:08:06,410 --> 00:08:07,730 Uh, no. 148 00:08:08,950 --> 00:08:10,590 Let me think. You're thinking of me. 149 00:08:10,810 --> 00:08:12,490 Are you thinking you're going to smack me? 150 00:08:13,450 --> 00:08:15,370 No, but that's not a bad idea. 151 00:08:18,190 --> 00:08:19,190 Boys, 152 00:08:21,630 --> 00:08:24,070 you did one hell of a job cleaning this junk out. 153 00:08:24,590 --> 00:08:26,870 You must have been selling like real pros. 154 00:08:27,270 --> 00:08:29,890 Yeah, we ripped people off. 155 00:08:30,930 --> 00:08:32,850 Well, you can have that bushwhacker. 156 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:39,440 And I guess I owe you 10%. Let's see, that would be $6. 157 00:08:39,659 --> 00:08:43,020 Uh, weren't we supposed to get, like, $10? 158 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:47,340 Yeah. Well, maybe you boys need to brush up on your business sense. 159 00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:51,500 Now, a deal is a deal, and I expect you to honor it. 160 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,080 What a ripoff. 161 00:08:54,340 --> 00:08:57,900 Yeah, he really screwed us. Yeah, and now he's rich. 162 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:00,340 What in the hell? 163 00:09:17,550 --> 00:09:18,890 Bombastic. Yeah, yeah. 164 00:09:19,650 --> 00:09:21,350 Bombastic. Yeah, here it is. 165 00:09:24,490 --> 00:09:27,670 Mr. Romantic. Mr. Bombastic. 166 00:09:28,550 --> 00:09:29,550 Mr. 167 00:09:32,570 --> 00:09:33,750 Romantic. Mr. 168 00:09:34,150 --> 00:09:35,170 Bombastic. Mr. 169 00:09:38,350 --> 00:09:39,350 Bombastic. 170 00:09:39,930 --> 00:09:40,930 Mr. 171 00:09:42,830 --> 00:09:43,830 Bombastic. 172 00:09:44,940 --> 00:09:46,940 What does bombastic mean anyway? 173 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:53,440 Well, it's like bombastic is like even better than fantastic. 174 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:59,900 You know, like if you were scoring, you'd be like, this is bombastic. 175 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:03,560 Really? 176 00:10:03,880 --> 00:10:08,000 I always imagine, you know, like if I was ever going to score, you know, I'd 177 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,000 like going. 178 00:10:15,599 --> 00:10:16,680 Stuff like that. 179 00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:22,440 Really? If I ever score, I'm going to be going, this is fantastic, Mr. 180 00:10:22,820 --> 00:10:23,820 Bombastic. 181 00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:30,240 What is this accent he's talking? 182 00:10:31,580 --> 00:10:32,820 Dumbass, it's foreign. 183 00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:34,500 Oh, yeah, yeah. 184 00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:42,180 Damn it, Beavis, cut that out. 12193