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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:18,099 --> 00:00:19,420 On our watch. 2 00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:21,520 This is gonna be cool. 3 00:00:22,240 --> 00:00:23,240 Yeah. 4 00:00:24,260 --> 00:00:25,340 Morning wood. 5 00:00:26,700 --> 00:00:28,720 I saw a dog with morning wood once. 6 00:00:30,300 --> 00:00:34,840 So, like, when you say you saw a dog with morning wood, do you mean, like, 7 00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:36,340 had a wood drill or the dog did? 8 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:40,280 Um, we both did, I think. 9 00:00:42,180 --> 00:00:45,460 Check this out. Uh, do you have any horses? 10 00:00:46,620 --> 00:00:48,740 No, we only have wild animals here. 11 00:00:49,340 --> 00:00:52,740 Uh, how about, like, really big dogs? 12 00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:59,080 Wild animals only. 13 00:00:59,820 --> 00:01:02,940 So, like, do you have any, uh, woodpecker? 14 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:09,480 Woodpecker. Why don't you kids go annoy the animals or something? 15 00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:23,500 Is that the elephant chain? 16 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:24,900 Uh, yeah. 17 00:01:25,140 --> 00:01:27,060 Wow. Boy, they sure look different. 18 00:01:27,940 --> 00:01:32,120 Uh... Maybe it's because I had to, like, you know, clean themselves up, you 19 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:33,240 know, because it's a slow song. 20 00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:35,380 Yeah, I'll buy that. 21 00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:43,440 You remember that time we went to the circus and we saw that clown? 22 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:46,300 And then I, like, pulled down my pants. 23 00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:48,460 Whoa, check it out. I just saw a nipple, but I didn't look. 24 00:01:48,660 --> 00:01:49,660 Where? 25 00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:54,300 It was, like, right at the end of a boob. See, that's just a puppet nipple. 26 00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:58,400 No, it wasn't. What do you mean? 27 00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,460 That's just like a chick made out of clay, Beavis. 28 00:02:01,860 --> 00:02:02,860 Oh. 29 00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:05,320 Yeah, but you got a nipple on it. 30 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:10,780 Beavis, I could go get some clay now and make a boob with a nipple on it. So 31 00:02:10,780 --> 00:02:13,720 what? Wait a minute. Do you have some clay? 32 00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:16,960 No. 33 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:24,700 Next time they have a clay project in school, I'm going to make a big boob. 34 00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:27,600 Maybe a butt, too. 35 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:28,760 Yeah. 36 00:02:29,540 --> 00:02:31,560 Last time you just made an ashtray. 37 00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:33,920 It's fucked. 38 00:02:35,700 --> 00:02:36,700 Well, 39 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:38,600 you made a baseball. 40 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:40,000 Oh, yeah. 41 00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:43,860 Then the teacher called me a lazy turd. 42 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:46,000 So then you made that. 43 00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:47,900 Yeah. 44 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:49,760 But not out of clay. 45 00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:58,590 Which is so long that the elephant uses it to feed himself. 46 00:02:59,950 --> 00:03:01,530 That would be cool. 47 00:03:01,950 --> 00:03:02,950 Yeah. 48 00:03:03,390 --> 00:03:05,350 But I don't see it. Where is it? 49 00:03:05,590 --> 00:03:06,590 Where? 50 00:03:06,790 --> 00:03:09,650 His nose is, like, in the way. 51 00:03:10,450 --> 00:03:12,270 Are there any questions back there? 52 00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:15,890 Yeah, yeah. 53 00:03:16,750 --> 00:03:20,410 Who has the biggest, you know, thingies? 54 00:03:21,530 --> 00:03:22,990 What do you mean? 55 00:03:23,310 --> 00:03:26,300 He means, like... Which animals have the biggest thingies? 56 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:28,680 Well, 57 00:03:30,540 --> 00:03:33,640 I suppose it depends on what you mean by thingies. 58 00:03:34,020 --> 00:03:35,980 Giraffes do have very long necks. 59 00:03:36,540 --> 00:03:39,560 Unfortunately, our giraffe is laid up with a pulled groin muscle. 60 00:03:44,180 --> 00:03:45,180 Well, 61 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:48,720 next on our tour is a gorilla. 62 00:03:50,410 --> 00:03:54,970 This animal's natural habitat is the jungles of Central Africa, and his diet 63 00:03:54,970 --> 00:04:00,150 includes... Uh, when he's bad or something, do you ever, like, have to 64 00:04:00,150 --> 00:04:01,150 your monkey? 65 00:04:02,690 --> 00:04:06,810 No, we don't permit any violence towards any of our animals. 66 00:04:07,390 --> 00:04:11,470 As I was saying, the gorilla's diet includes... Uh, because Beavis would be 67 00:04:11,470 --> 00:04:12,950 happy to spank his monkey. 68 00:04:13,530 --> 00:04:14,650 Shut up, Dillweed! 69 00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:18,190 What, why? 70 00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:22,980 Gentlemen, if you can't behave yourselves, I'll have to ask you to 71 00:04:22,980 --> 00:04:26,000 tour. Uh, okay. Yeah, okay. 72 00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:28,120 No problem. 73 00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:35,460 The female zebra's reluctance to mate is difficult to comprehend, since the male 74 00:04:35,460 --> 00:04:39,580 of the species is extremely well -endowed, as you can see. 75 00:04:39,820 --> 00:04:40,820 Whoa. 76 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:43,000 Tours suck. 77 00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:44,160 Yeah. 78 00:04:44,540 --> 00:04:46,620 They never talk about anything cool. 79 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:55,100 All these animals must have been, like, sprayed or something. Yeah, yeah. Then 80 00:04:55,100 --> 00:04:58,220 someone, like, cut their wieners off. And their dads, too. 81 00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:01,180 This zoo sucks. 82 00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:03,860 Let's get out of here. 83 00:05:04,540 --> 00:05:05,560 Yeah, really. 84 00:05:08,660 --> 00:05:09,660 Whoa. 85 00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:12,240 Snakes. 86 00:05:13,020 --> 00:05:14,060 Yeah, cool. 87 00:05:20,750 --> 00:05:21,750 Are they going to show a movie? 88 00:05:22,290 --> 00:05:24,470 We're in the snake home, fart knocker. 89 00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,670 They have to keep it dark because of the snakes. 90 00:05:28,730 --> 00:05:31,530 It, like, makes them scarier or something. Oh, yeah. 91 00:05:33,890 --> 00:05:34,890 Cool. 92 00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:36,910 There's, like, snakes everywhere. 93 00:05:38,690 --> 00:05:44,010 Yeah. You know, I bet, like, lots of chicks get real excited in this place. 94 00:05:45,310 --> 00:05:49,230 Especially if a snake, like, escapes from its cage or something. 95 00:05:51,150 --> 00:05:53,810 Yeah. Yeah. They get all excited and go, Snake! 96 00:05:54,210 --> 00:05:55,210 Snake! Snake! 97 00:05:55,390 --> 00:05:57,370 Did he say a snake escaped? Yeah. 98 00:05:57,990 --> 00:05:59,890 Escaped snake. Oh, my God. Where? Help! 99 00:06:21,710 --> 00:06:23,830 Old dude gets a pretty good sound out of that banjo. 100 00:06:24,570 --> 00:06:25,570 You rock. 101 00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:28,370 Uh, 102 00:06:29,690 --> 00:06:30,910 is this Skinner? 103 00:06:31,830 --> 00:06:35,010 No, wait. Hey, buddy, that's that guy from that Ozzy video. 104 00:06:35,570 --> 00:06:37,830 Uh, what Ozzy video? 105 00:06:38,690 --> 00:06:40,390 Is that Ozzy video with that chick? 106 00:06:40,650 --> 00:06:41,650 Oh, yeah. 107 00:06:42,250 --> 00:06:45,890 That one. You know that one, um, the one with that chick, like, that's, like, 108 00:06:45,890 --> 00:06:47,510 drowning in all those, uh, tears? 109 00:06:47,770 --> 00:06:50,550 Mm -hmm. And they're like, you know, like, he's got that guitar and he 110 00:06:56,620 --> 00:06:57,359 Oh, yeah. 111 00:06:57,360 --> 00:06:58,720 That was cool. 112 00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:10,820 That old dude should start his own band. 113 00:07:11,260 --> 00:07:14,980 Yeah, yeah. It's like they could rock out, and it's like they could go 114 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:16,440 Yeah. 115 00:07:17,580 --> 00:07:18,700 Fishing is cool. 116 00:07:19,260 --> 00:07:20,260 Yeah, yeah. 117 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:22,880 I like going fishing with worms. 118 00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:27,030 Because it's like you take the worm and you put that worm blower in it and it'll 119 00:07:27,030 --> 00:07:28,030 blow up its butt. 120 00:07:28,210 --> 00:07:29,690 What are you talking about, Viva? 121 00:07:29,970 --> 00:07:32,470 You know, yeah, like a little pump and you stick them in the worm's butt. You 122 00:07:32,470 --> 00:07:33,269 know what I'm talking about. 123 00:07:33,270 --> 00:07:35,690 Uh, no, I don't, Viva. 124 00:07:36,130 --> 00:07:37,930 Yeah, yeah, it's like it makes them float or something. 125 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:04,080 Let go, Beavis. 126 00:08:04,540 --> 00:08:05,640 Yeah, yeah, I got him good. 127 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:07,680 He's not that big. 128 00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:09,240 Yeah. 129 00:08:09,460 --> 00:08:10,800 He's a pretty small snake. 130 00:08:12,340 --> 00:08:13,340 Help! 131 00:08:13,780 --> 00:08:14,780 Snake! 132 00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:16,520 Hit the lights! 133 00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:18,140 Quick, turn on the lights! 134 00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:20,700 What the hell? 135 00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:24,500 I thought you had him, dumbass. 136 00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:26,040 You think you had him, butthole? 137 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:29,820 Uh, I think he, like, escaped or something. 138 00:08:30,060 --> 00:08:31,240 Yeah, yeah, he got away. 139 00:08:31,460 --> 00:08:32,460 We had him, though. 140 00:08:45,390 --> 00:08:47,570 Uh, meet the Flintstones. 141 00:08:49,390 --> 00:08:52,730 Pleased to make your acquaintance. Please say hello to my butt. 142 00:08:53,370 --> 00:08:54,370 Yeah. 143 00:08:54,830 --> 00:08:56,290 My butt rock. 144 00:08:57,110 --> 00:08:58,390 My rock butt. 145 00:09:03,980 --> 00:09:04,980 This is a Flintstone. 146 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:06,960 This is Roseanne. Oh, yeah, yeah. 147 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:08,640 Yeah, there's Roseanne, see? 148 00:09:08,920 --> 00:09:10,420 That was Butt -San. 149 00:09:11,620 --> 00:09:12,620 Oh, yeah. 150 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,520 Hey, Butt -It, was this what the Stone Age was really like? 151 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:19,580 No, it was more like Jurassic Park. 152 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:23,100 Yeah, special effects were better back then. 153 00:09:23,900 --> 00:09:28,980 This is like intact, in -catch, in -catch, in -catch, in -act, in -catcher. 154 00:09:33,119 --> 00:09:34,119 Yeah. 155 00:09:34,580 --> 00:09:39,140 If these were real cavemen, they'd, like, have long hair and beards and 156 00:09:39,140 --> 00:09:42,580 be, like, sniffing each other's butts and, like, beating each other up with 157 00:09:42,580 --> 00:09:44,980 rocks and, like, pulling women around by their hair. 158 00:09:45,360 --> 00:09:50,020 Really? Hey, buddy, I bet my Uncle Louie's a caveman. Oh, yeah. 159 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:53,760 Do cavemen, like, have cars up on blocks in their front lawn? 160 00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:56,140 Uh, I think so. 161 00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:58,480 Yeah, yeah, that's him. He's a caveman. Yeah. 162 00:09:58,880 --> 00:09:59,880 You know that. 11004