Original subtitles

"The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet," starring

the entire Nelson family.

Here's Ozzie.

Here's Harriet.

Here's David.

Here's Rick.

And also starring in tonight's episode, here's Chris.

Do you want to sit in a booth?

Yeah, we might as well.

- Hiya, folks. - Hi, Wally.

Hi, Wally.

What happened, Jack catch you sneaking out

without paying the bill? No, nothing like that.

I've got a legitimate job here.

I tried to make a deal with them.

No salary, just all I could eat. But he chickened out.

He was afraid he'd go bankrupt.

He knows you pretty well, doesn't he?

I guess he does. What will you have?

Chris?

I think I'll have a chocolate malt.

- Yeah, same here. - Yes, sir, two chocolate malts.

And shall I check the oil in the battery?

No, that was my last job.

Jack, two chocolate malts here, please.

Uh, excuse me, Chris.

Listen, before Jack gets here, I'd like a little advice.

Yeah, go ahead.

Well, you've been working at the law office for over a year

now.

How do you go about asking for a raise?

You mean you're going to ask him for a raise?

Well, sure, a guy's got to ask for a raise sooner or later.

How long have you been working here?

I started Monday morning, early Monday morning.

- This is only Wednesday. - Well, that's two days.

That's twice as long as I worked at the gas station.

Besides, I'm doing a pretty good job here if I do say so myself.

Hi, Rick. Chris.

- Hi. - Hi, Jack.

Did you call in an order?

Oh, yeah, two chocolate malts.

Hey, you better make it three, and an order of French fries.

Oh, sorry, Jack-- boss, sir.

He is really a great guy, though.

Give them that old smile, Jack.

Wally, do you mind?

Oh,. Right away, sir.

You do that.

Uh, better not make anything about the raise.

I want to pick just the right moment, but this may not be it.

You could be right.

Sometimes I can't believe that guy.

I'll tell you this much, he's got more nerve

than anybody else I know.

Do you really think he's going to ask for a raise?

Who knows?

Here, I've been working at the law office for over a year,

and I've never asked for one.

Well, do you think you should be getting more money?

I don't know.

To be honest with you, I haven't thought about it much.

Has it really been a year since you

started working there?

Well, yeah, at least that.

You know, come to think of it, maybe I should ask for a raise.

Why not if you think you deserve it?

Well, they seem to be satisfied with my work.

I do everything I'm supposed to and a lot more.

And we sure could use the money.

The only thing is I feel a little funny about asking

my own brother for a raise.

Oh, that's easy.

You call your father, he tells your mother, she calls Dave,

and you've got your raise.

I've been thinking it's just something I've got to do

on my own, strictly on an employer-employee basis.

When are you going to ask him?

Wait a second now. Don't rush me.

I'm not sure I'm going to ask him yet.

I thought you said you deserved one.

Well, I said, I think I do.

Besides, you don't go in and ask for a raise any old time.

You got to pick the right moment.

A raise?

You're asking for a raise?

Now, Jack, maybe remember your blood pressure.

Well, you can't blame a guy for trying.

See what I mean?

You know, we sure could use a new rug in the living room.

Let's get a new television set first.

Then you are going to ask for a raise?

Well, I don't know.

I'm still thinking it over.

Well, why don't you practice on me?

Pretend I'm David, and you've just

come in to ask for a raise.

That's the oldest routine in show business.

You know that, don't you?

OK, it's an old routine.

Now I'm David, and I've just hung up the phone.

Well, who have you been talking to?

Uh, Judge Whiffletree.

Willoughby.

Are you asking me or telling me?

OK, you've just been talking to Judge Whiffletree.

Did you win the case or lose it?

What difference does that make?

Well, I just want to know what kind of mood you're in.

OK, I'm in an average mood.

Now I'm David, and you've just come in through the door.

OK, just a second.

Good morning, Dave.

Good morning, Rick.

What's on your mind?

Well, Chris and I were having a little talk last night.

Oh, you're going to make me the heavy in this.

Well, thanks a lot.

Well, I'm just trying to find some way

to get into the conversation.

Can't you do it without dragging me into it?

OK, I'll try another approach.

Have I ever told you what beautiful eyes you have?

You're going to say that to Dave?

Oh, of course not.

I'm going to say that to Ms. Edwards, his secretary.

I figure if I can get her on my side, the rest is easy.

Yeah, I see what you mean.

What are you doing?

Oh, I thought I might phone Dave and talk

to him about the raise.

I thought you were going to talk to him at the office.

Well, I got to thinking it's usually pretty busy there.

And it might not be a good idea to bring it up

while he's got his mind on a lot of other things.

Well, yeah, maybe you're right.

Yeah, I figured this might be a good time.

He's probably finished dinner, and he's just

sitting there relaxing, maybe having a second cup of coffee

or watching television.

Well, then hurry up before he falls asleep on the couch.

Here it goes.

Hello?

Oh, hi, Rick.

Oh, I'm not disturbing you, am I?

No, I was just sitting here reading.

How's June?

Not so good.

She's got a real bad cold.

Gee, that's a shame.

I think she'll be all right, though.

I made her get right into bed.

In fact, I just finished doing the dishes.

Oh, well, this has been a pretty long day for you, huh?

Boy, you're not kidding, which reminds me,

where did you get that hamburger you brought me for lunch?

Well, the usual place. Why?

It must have been loaded with garlic or onions or something.

No kidding, I told them just ketchup.

I was getting those residuals all afternoon.

- Gee, I'm sorry. - That's OK.

It was just one of those days when

everything seemed to go wrong.

Oh, before I forget, I hate to sound like I'm picking on you,

but separately is spelled with an A, S-E-P-A-R-A-T-E-L-Y.

You keep spelling it with an E.

Oh, gee, I'll have to watch that.

You made some pencil notations on the Halsey contract,

and old Judge McCormick was reading over my shoulder

and happened to catch it.

Well, I'm sorry, Dave.

That's OK.

Just gave me a little lecture on the importance of spelling.

Did you call me about anything special?

Oh, well, nothing that can't wait till tomorrow.

OK.

Well, I'll see you at the office.

How's Chris? Oh, she's fine.

Thanks.

Tell June we were asking for her.

I'm sorry that she's not feeling too well.

Oh, I'm sure she'll be OK in a day or two.

I'll see you tomorrow then. OK.

Good night, Dave.

Struck out, huh?

Not exactly.

Let's say I didn't come to bat.

Do you have your briefcase?

Yeah, it's right here.

What's this?

Your lunch.

Well, I always buy my lunch downtown.

I know it.

I just thought it might look better if you

brought your lunch with you.

You know, you're so busy and conscientious,

you don't have time to go out to lunch.

Besides, it's more economical.

Well, whatever you say.

Hey, you've got on one of your new shirts.

Well, sure.

Well, you could have at least found one with a frayed collar.

I suppose so.

I could have worn my socks with the holes in them, too.

What holes?

I'm only kidding.

Relax, will you?

It's my own brother I'm going to be talking to.

I know, and I'm sure everything will turn out fine.

Good luck. Thank you.

And I promise to mend them right away.

Mend what?

Your socks with the holes in them.

I'll tell you what.

When I get the raise, I'll buy some new ones.

Oh, hi, Rick.

Good morning.

Hey, you're a little early this morning, aren't you?

Yeah, I just wanted to make sure I wouldn't be late.

Well, good for you.

- Hey, where's Dave? - He didn't come in yet.

Anything I can help you with?

Yeah, how about a raise?

Hey, yeah.

I think I'm about due for one.

Should I ask him as soon as he comes in?

Oh, no, you don't.

That was my idea.

- Good morning. - Good morning, Dave.

Good morning.

I'm glad to see the office staff is in a happy mood.

Nobody's getting any work done, but at least everybody's happy.

Any calls for me?

No, no calls, but don't forget you

have an appointment with Mr. Andrews,

and then you have the meeting in Judge Willoughby's office.

Oh, and a special delivery just arrived from Mr. Kelly.

Oh, thanks.

Hey, Dave, can I talk to you for a second?

Yeah, come on in.

Oh.

Have a seat.

Thanks.

Yes?

Oh, uh, just a second.

Gee, it's Mr. Andrews.

He's a little early. Oh, that's OK.

This can wait. I'll talk to you later.

Oh, are you sure now?

Yeah, that's OK.

Uh, would you have him come in, please?

Thanks.

Hi, Mr. Andrews. Hello, Dave.

- This is my brother, Rick. - Hi, Mr. Andrews.

- How are you doing? - Come on and sit down.

Thanks.

How long have they been in there?

About 25 minutes.

It seems like an hour and 25 minutes.

I know what you mean.

I'll get back to you in about two or three days, then.

That'll be fine. Thanks a lot, Dave.

- OK. - Goodbye.

- Bye. - Goodbye.

Bye.

Bye.

Oh, glad to see you're still happy out here.

Oh, we didn't get to finish what we were talking about, did we?

- Well, we never got started. - Oh, come on in.

Look, I know you're busy, so I'll get right to the point.

Sure, just a sec.

I was wondering if there's any chance of my getting a raise.

Dave?

Oh, yeah.

Well, not right now.

Well, hold on a second, honey.

Uh, it's June, Rick. I'm sorry.

I'll be right with you.

She said to say hello.

Oh, thanks.

Gee, I don't care.

Well, why don't you make the reservations?

OK.

Yeah, that'd be fine.

You sure you feel all right now?

Oh, OK.

Bye-bye.

Uh, if June doesn't call back by about 5 o'clock,

could you phone her and find out where

we're having dinner tonight?

- OK. - Mr. Nelson?

Oh, hi, Ed. Come on in.

You wanted to see me about something?

Uh, yeah, there must be a loose connection

in the floor plug in my office.

I tried a new bulb, but it still doesn't work.

Oh, let me take a look at it.

Oh, I'll be with you in a second.

It's this one over here.

Dobson and Kelly.

Oh, sure, he's right here. For you, Rick.

Chris, line 2. Oh, thanks.

Hi.

No, I haven't had a chance to talk to him yet.

I just haven't had a chance.

Will it take very long?

No, just a couple of minutes, Mr. Nelson.

I'll be right back.

Look, I got to go now.

Dave, you're going to be late.

I didn't realize what time it was.

I'll phone him and tell him you're on your way.

OK, thanks.

Oh, uh, Rick, I'm sorry.

I'm late for an appointment.

I'll talk to you as soon as I get back.

Is there anything more to be done on this?

No, that can be filed.

Well, that takes care of everything, doesn't it?

Unless there's something I don't know about,

he's all yours. What about phone calls?

I'll hold them.

Well, do you think June might call again?

No, I don't think so. She's at the beauty shop.

What about Chris?

No, she's under strict orders.

Do not call again today.

I don't know what you're so worried about anyway.

After all, he's your own brother.

Well, that just makes it easier for him to put me off.

You saw what happened this morning.

- Hi. - Hi, Dave.

Hi, Dave.

How'd it go with Judge Willoughby?

Well, you won't believe this, but we settled the Miller case

out of court. Hey, that's great.

Hey, that's wonderful news.

Oh, by the way, you did a good job on those briefs.

Oh, thanks.

Of course, you misspelled a few words here and there.

Well, that figures.

- How was my typing? - Perfect.

Thank you.

You know, I was thinking on the way

up here, when a guy works hard and puts in a lot of time

and does a good job, he deserves a little extra recognition.

A little reward.

Don't you think so?

Gee, it's funny you should say that.

Mr. Nelson.

Oh, yeah.

Would you bring it in here, please?

What's this?

That's the little reward I was telling you about.

I bought myself a chair.

You bought this for yourself?

Yeah, for my office.

Uh, right in there, fellas.

Gee, it's beautiful, Dave.

It's kind of a thinking chair where

I can stretch out and relax.

It was a little extravagant.

So if you two could cut down on the office expenses,

I'd sure appreciate it.

Let's see.

Why don't we try it over here by the window?

How about over there?

It's not so drafty.

Yeah, that's a good idea.

When the boss gets through playing with his new toy,

would you give him a message? You mean about the raise?

Forget the raise.

Tell him I quit.

You're kidding!

No, I really mean it.

I quit the job.

Oh, I thought you were just going to ask for a raise.

Well, that was the original idea.

And he turned you down?

Well, I didn't get a chance to talk to him about that.

Well, how can you quit if you didn't

get a chance to talk to him?

I told Ms. Edwards to tell him.

Oh, well, then you've got nothing to worry about.

It's not official. It's only hearsay.

I know a little bit about law myself.

No, that's got nothing to do with it.

Besides, I went back later and told him myself.

You two didn't have a fight, did you?

Oh, no, it was all very pleasant.

In fact, he didn't even ask me why.

That's funny.

I thought so, too, at first, but while I was driving home,

it all became clear to me. What do you mean?

Well, the reason he's never given me a raise

was because he was hoping I'd quit.

I find that hard to believe.

Well, put yourself in David's shoes.

Your brother's working for you, and you're not

satisfied with his work.

You think somebody else can do the job better.

How can you fire your own brother?

What exactly did you say to each other?

Well, let me think.

I'm not sure of the exact words, but it was something like this.

I hope you understand there's nothing personal about this.

It's just that I think it'd be better if I quit.

As I say, it's nothing personal.

Oh, sure.

I understand.

Naturally, I hate to see you go, but I certainly

don't want to stand in the way of you getting a better job.

When do you want to leave?

Well, there's no big rush.

I'll stick around until you can find somebody else.

I'll start looking around then.

Well, there, you see?

He said I hate to see you go.

Well, what else can he say? You know Dave.

He doesn't like to hurt anybody's feelings.

Do you have any other job in mind?

Are you kidding?

I wouldn't know where to begin to look.

What are we having for dinner?

Beef stew, OK?

Yeah, fine.

Oh, and I baked a cake.

A cake?

Yeah, a great big one.

What for?

Well, it had to be big to hold the inscription.

What inscription?

It was supposed to be kind of a joke.

But I don't think it's very funny now.

Well, is this it?

Yeah, but I don't think you should read it.

Why not?

Congratulations on your raise.

Hey, that is funny.

Then how come you're not laughing?

Well, it may not be funny to us, but it is funny.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Uh, my name is Nelson.

I have an appointment with Dean Hopkins.

Yes.

Mr. Nelson's here.

Yes, sir.

Just go right in, Mr. Nelson.

OK, thank you.

Well, good morning, David.

This is a pleasant surprise. Oh, thank you.

I certainly appreciate your seeing me.

I realize this is rather short notice.

Not at all, it's a pleasure. Sit down.

Thank you.

Well, I understand you're doing real well over there

with Dobson and Kelly.

Oh, thank you.

Actually, Mr. Dobson isn't very active anymore.

And Mr. Kelly is out of town quite a bit.

So it leaves me with quite a lot of responsibility.

And I understand you're handling it very well.

Oh, well, thank you.

How's Rick doing over there?

Well, actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.

He's been doing remarkably well.

Even though he only works part-time,

he's been handling so many details for me

that he's made himself practically indispensable.

Well, I'm glad to hear it.

He's a fine boy.

In fact, I wrote Mr. Kelly suggesting

a substantial raise for him, and I just

got the OK yesterday morning.

Oh, that's great.

Well, unfortunately, it didn't work out so well.

June and I were going to take him and Chris out to dinner

and surprise him with the news, but he surprised me instead.

Well, what do you mean?

Well, he was very pleasant about it,

but he told me he wanted to quit.

Did he give any reason?

No, but you know Rick.

He doesn't like to hurt anybody's feelings.

I guess he just felt that he wasn't getting anywhere

and that he'd have a better opportunity in a bigger office.

I can't say that I blame him.

After all, it isn't much fun working for your own brother.

Well, do you want me to have a little talk with him

and see what I can do about it?

Well, that was my first inclination,

but I'm afraid that'd be a little too selfish on my part.

He said he'd stay on until I got somebody to take his place.

So I thought you could keep your eye open.

I'll be glad to help out in any way you suggest.

Well, if you do think of a bright young law student

who'd like to work part-time as a clerk at a rather meager

salary in a small law firm with a limited future,

just give me a ring.

You make it sound so tempting, I may apply for the job myself.

As a matter of fact, I do have a young man in mind.

It's just a hunch, but I'll check it out and let you know.

Well, thank you.

I'd sure appreciate anything you can do.

- It's a pleasure. - Bye.

Goodbye.

Oh, you're kidding.

No, I really mean it.

He's quitting his job.

Well, I can't understand that.

How did it happen?

Well, I really don't know.

All I know is that Rick is convinced

that David wanted him to quit, so he

figured he'd save him the embarrassment

of firing his own brother.

That's a shame, but after all, they're big boys now.

And I think it's up to them to work out

their differences without any interference

from their parents.

Oh, I think you're absolutely right.

Of course, I don't think it'd be considered interfering

if I happened to run into the boys

and casually ask them about the situation, do you?

Oh, no, of course not.

Like maybe tomorrow?

I was thinking of this afternoon.

That's even better.

Don't tell it around the campus,

but I'm thinking about quitting myself.

Well, don't let me influence you.

Hey, wait a minute. Here's an idea.

Why don't we switch jobs?

Are you kidding?

No, I could break you into this job in a couple of hours.

You've got a real feel for ice cream, I could tell.

I could have you making the best banana splits

in town in no time.

The secret's all in the way you slice the bananas.

I'm not talking about that.

Besides, you'd be crazy to quit this job.

It suits you and your stomach.

Can you imagine how much you'd miss

the smell of those sizzling hamburgers and chili and beans?

Well, maybe you're right. Let's not talk about it anymore.

You're making me hungry.

If anybody's got a problem, it's me.

I have a hunch I could go to work for Judge Willoughby,

but I'd probably have to change my school schedule all around.

And most of the other law offices

are so far downtown, I'd spend all my time commuting.

They'd probably all expect me to wear a business suit just

to lick stamps and mail letters.

Well, you've got a point there.

Hey, there's Ginger. I want to talk to her.

Finish this for me, will you? What do you want me to do?

Oh, just put some chocolate syrup

on it, some whipped cream, some nuts, and a cherry on top.

It goes in the second booth. I'll be right back.

- Hi. - Hi.

- You got a job here? - Sure.

Why not?

It's a nice, respectable job.

Pleasant atmosphere.

Tips are good.

Plenty of food here.

Things get tough, we can always eat.

You're kidding.

Yeah, I've just taken over for Wally.

He'll be right back. Well, I was wondering.

In fact, I was kind of surprised to see you here at all.

I thought you had a class this period.

Hey, that's right.

Take over for me, will you?

Hey, what do I do?

Just put some whipped cream and a cherry on top.

It goes to the second booth down there.

Oh, boy, thanks a lot.

Well, Chris, what are you doing here?

Oh, hi, Mom. I'm just helping Rick out.

He's helping Wally. Oh.

- Oh, my gosh. - What's the matter?

He forgot his books. Finish this for me, will you?

Well, what do I do?

Well, just put a cherry on top and deliver it

to the second booth. Thanks a lot.

Oh, hi.

How long have you been working here?

Oh, about 10 seconds.

I've been helping Wally out, indirectly.

- Oh. - What are you doing here?

Uh, well, I heard the news about the boy,

so I stopped in for a minute, and I noticed Rick come in.

So I asked Wally not to tell him I was here

so he wouldn't think I came down to snoop around.

Oh, why did you come down?

Uh, to snoop around.

To snoop around.

What did you find out?

Uh, well, there's one thing I know for sure.

Rick is sorry he's quitting.

Well, I know for sure David doesn't want him to quit.

Every time I see him, he tells me

what a great job Rick's doing.

In other words, they're both just being stubborn.

It's a shame they didn't inherit more of your good qualities.

Never mind that.

What do we do about it?

Well, frankly, I think this calls for some good,

old-fashioned parental interference.

Let's go up to the law office and straighten those guys out

before it's too late. I'm with you.

Let's go. Oh.

Just as soon as I finish this ice cream.

What are you going to say?

Well, we're just going to try and get the family together

and have a little conference.

We used to be able to settle things that way.

- Hi, Mom, Pop. - Oh, hi.

I thought you had a class.

Well, I did, but they let me out a little early.

I had a message from Dean Hopkins.

Oh, anything important?

Well, it could be.

He just left word that he had an excellent job lined up for me.

With a law firm?

Yeah.

And for more money than I'm getting here, too.

Oh, well, that sounds great, doesn't it?

Well, I suppose so.

I'd rather be working for Dave.

Well, then, why don't you tell him?

I'm sure he wants you to stay.

No, he really doesn't, Mom.

- Oh, Rick. - Oh, hi.

- Hi, hun. - Hi, Mrs. Nelson.

Hi, Mr. Nelson.

Excuse me, Rick, but Dave is looking for you.

He wants to see you right away in his office.

Oh, OK.

See, what did I tell you?

He's probably going to lower the boom.

He's found somebody else to take my place.

Well, maybe not.

We'll see.

Oh, hi.

Oh, hi.

What are you doing down here?

Dean Hopkins asked me if I'd deliver this letter to David.

- Is it about Ricky? - I don't know.

I don't think I should read it.

After all, it's not addressed to me.

Besides, it's sealed.

Let me see.

It's sealed, all right.

I thought you said you wanted to see me.

Oh, yeah, come on in.

Sit down.

Thanks.

Are you familiar with Harris versus Tyree?

Yeah, it has to do with oral contracts, doesn't it?

Yeah that's right.

Except for certain specific statutory exceptions,

an oral contract is just as binding and enforceable in law

as a written contract.

What are you driving at?

Well, I refer to our oral agreement

whereby you stated that you would

continue to work here until I had

found a suitable replacement.

Yeah, that's right.

I said that.

But I didn't agree to look for a suitable replacement.

I'm sorry, old boy, but it looks like you'll be working here

for at least 20 years--

at a raise in salary, of course.

Do you mean that?

Oh, excuse me.

I'm sorry to interrupt, but I have

an important letter for you, Dave, from Dean Hopkins.

Oh, thanks.

- And you have some visitors. - Hi, Dave.

- Hi, Mom. - Hi, Dave.

Hi, Pop. Sit down.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, would you excuse me a second?

Go ahead.

Does it have anything to do with me?

Oh, well, yeah, indirectly.

Well, look, Dave, before you get excited,

Dean Hawkins left a message that he had a job for me

with an excellent law firm.

But I'm going to turn it down if that's what that's all about.

Yeah, well, not exactly.

Would you mind reading it?

Yeah, I think we'd all kind of like to hear it.

Oh, OK.

Dear Dave, I have carefully considered the qualifications

of the many applicants for the job of clerk in your office.

Although there are several outstanding young men

among them, I sincerely believe that the man best suited

for the job is Roy Rehtorb.

Roy Rehtorb?

- What kind of name is that? - Who is he?

I've never heard of him.

How do you like that?

I thought Dean Hopkins was a friend of mine.

And the irony of it, he has my wife deliver the letter.

Roy Rehtorb has had a year's experience

with one of the outstanding law firms in the city.

He's an excellent student, reliable, personable,

enthusiastic, and industrious.

And he has a logical mind and is extremely articulate.

Well, so is Rick.

Everything he said about that guy could apply to Rick.

There's more.

Roy Rehtorb's only shortcoming is that he is a lousy speller.

The dean said that?

Now that really sounds like me.

However, many brilliant men are poor spellers.

In fact, I was always backward in spelling myself.

Wait a minute.

Hold everything.

Did he say backward in spelling?

Yeah, that's right.

Roy Rehtorb is "yor brother" spelled backwards.

Let me see that.

I sincerely believe that the man best suited for the job

is your brother.

Yor, Y-O-R?

OK, I admit it.

I'm a lousy speller.

Your brother has had a year's experience

with one of the outstanding law firms in the city.

He is an excellent student, reliable, personable,

enthusiastic, and industrious.

He plays the guitar and sings.

Tonight's "Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet"

was brought to you by your gas company.

Which helps you live modern for less with gas.

That's what we Nelsons do.