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1
00:00:02,416 --> 00:00:04,106
A wise man once said,
2
00:00:04,107 --> 00:00:06,453
"A little
friendly competition
never hurt anyone."
3
00:00:06,454 --> 00:00:08,110
You need any help
organizing my money?
4
00:00:08,111 --> 00:00:10,147
I wonder if he was
talking about this bunch?
5
00:00:10,148 --> 00:00:11,838
Who needs?
6
00:00:11,839 --> 00:00:14,565
So you guys all still down
for the games decathlon
this weekend?
7
00:00:14,566 --> 00:00:15,635
Is that
the board game thing?
8
00:00:15,636 --> 00:00:17,740
Oh, yeah!
Yeah!
9
00:00:17,741 --> 00:00:20,019
Ten games, three nights,
the losers buy booze
for the winning team
10
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:21,537
for one whole month.
11
00:00:21,538 --> 00:00:25,058
Finally. It's a chance
to avenge our loss
to these two.
12
00:00:25,059 --> 00:00:26,680
Yeah!
Yeah!
13
00:00:26,681 --> 00:00:27,923
We didn't lose. We tied.
14
00:00:27,924 --> 00:00:31,133
Tying Mike is a loss,
so we lost.
15
00:00:31,134 --> 00:00:34,585
Yes! Victory is ours!
Eat it!
16
00:00:34,586 --> 00:00:36,518
Good one, Weird Al.
So not scared.
17
00:00:36,519 --> 00:00:39,072
You better be,
'cause Kenny and I are
gonna be all over you
18
00:00:39,073 --> 00:00:40,694
like a pair of wool pajamas.
19
00:00:40,695 --> 00:00:42,627
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Kenny is my partner.
20
00:00:42,628 --> 00:00:43,732
Your partner?
21
00:00:43,733 --> 00:00:45,251
Yeah, don't you remember?
22
00:00:45,252 --> 00:00:46,459
You were just
sitting in for me.
23
00:00:46,460 --> 00:00:48,323
I couldn't make
the last decathlon.
24
00:00:48,324 --> 00:00:51,395
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
You were off
dating that rich guy.
25
00:00:51,396 --> 00:00:52,672
Vince.
Mitch.
26
00:00:52,673 --> 00:00:54,363
Hank.
No, I think it was Mitch.
27
00:00:54,364 --> 00:00:57,125
Mitch. Vince.
Hank. Whatever, man.
That dude sucked.
28
00:00:57,126 --> 00:00:59,196
All the guys you date suck.
29
00:00:59,197 --> 00:01:00,852
I kind of like
the new one.
30
00:01:00,853 --> 00:01:02,751
Hmm. Bobby,
you must suck
in some way.
31
00:01:02,752 --> 00:01:04,373
We just haven't
figured it out yet.
32
00:01:04,374 --> 00:01:09,241
You hurt my sister,
I'll have another scotch.
33
00:01:11,174 --> 00:01:14,280
Anyway, the point is,
the team is me and Kenny,
34
00:01:14,281 --> 00:01:19,008
it always has been,
and we're three and one
against you, suckers!
35
00:01:19,009 --> 00:01:20,217
Uh-uh!
36
00:01:20,218 --> 00:01:21,425
Three and two.
37
00:01:21,426 --> 00:01:23,461
Okay, but it's
still my team.
38
00:01:23,462 --> 00:01:25,498
That I'm not on.
I want to play.
39
00:01:25,499 --> 00:01:27,501
Okay. We pick Bobby.
Bobby!
40
00:01:28,536 --> 00:01:29,847
Wait. We're picking
up new players now?
41
00:01:29,848 --> 00:01:31,642
You can't do that.
This is not happening.
42
00:01:31,643 --> 00:01:34,748
Look, losers pick first,
and we pick Bobby.
43
00:01:34,749 --> 00:01:36,612
Now it's your turn.
We're not
picking new players.
44
00:01:36,613 --> 00:01:38,062
What are you talking about?
It's three against three.
45
00:01:38,063 --> 00:01:39,167
This will not stand!
46
00:01:39,168 --> 00:01:41,652
Oh. It will stand.
It will stand tall.
47
00:01:41,653 --> 00:01:42,998
And then it will
do a river dance.
48
00:01:42,999 --> 00:01:44,724
You know what?
That's cool.
That's cool.
49
00:01:44,725 --> 00:01:47,036
They want to be lame,
that's fine.
We'll pick... Um...
50
00:01:47,037 --> 00:01:48,417
Wait a minute.
51
00:01:50,075 --> 00:01:51,179
I think he moved.
52
00:01:51,180 --> 00:01:53,285
There's only
one person left.
53
00:01:54,044 --> 00:01:55,252
Dude.
54
00:01:55,253 --> 00:01:56,598
It's all right.
I've been picked last before,
55
00:01:56,599 --> 00:01:59,671
but I'm a lawyer now,
and I make $800,000 a year.
56
00:02:00,810 --> 00:02:02,569
Really?
No.
57
00:02:02,570 --> 00:02:04,468
But it made you
want to be my friend,
didn't it?
58
00:02:06,022 --> 00:02:08,679
Okay, it's settled.
You schmucks are going down.
59
00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:10,612
Dude, not a chance.
60
00:02:10,613 --> 00:02:14,719
Us, The Dream Team.
You, Angola.
61
00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:17,929
Us, Cheez-Its.
You, Cheese Nips.
62
00:02:17,930 --> 00:02:21,105
Us, The Godfather.
You, Godfather III.
63
00:02:21,106 --> 00:02:23,866
Us, Radiohead.
Y'all, Coldplay.
64
00:02:23,867 --> 00:02:25,005
What's wrong with Coldplay?
65
00:02:25,006 --> 00:02:27,767
Oh, dude,
if you even need to ask...
66
00:02:27,768 --> 00:02:29,356
Who's Coldplay?
67
00:02:40,539 --> 00:02:43,403
All right, all their
songs sound the same,
the guy's a douche,
68
00:02:43,404 --> 00:02:44,887
and he named
his kid Apple.
69
00:02:44,888 --> 00:02:47,028
Okay. Now,
who's Radiohead?
70
00:02:48,098 --> 00:02:49,340
Hey, all!
71
00:02:49,341 --> 00:02:50,652
Hey.
72
00:02:50,653 --> 00:02:52,343
Steph, it's poker night.
What's your deal?
73
00:02:52,344 --> 00:02:55,001
Well, I just got
a really cool freelance gig.
74
00:02:55,002 --> 00:02:57,348
I'm writing
an article for Cosmo.
75
00:02:57,349 --> 00:03:00,593
It's called,
"What He's Really Like
When You're Not Around."
76
00:03:00,594 --> 00:03:02,250
When you're not around?
Happier.
77
00:03:02,251 --> 00:03:04,355
So, I need your help.
You're beyond help.
78
00:03:04,356 --> 00:03:06,495
Wow.
Two jokes in a row, Kenny.
You want to go for three?
79
00:03:06,496 --> 00:03:07,703
What did the rug
say to the floor?
80
00:03:07,704 --> 00:03:08,877
I've got you covered.
81
00:03:08,878 --> 00:03:10,775
So I would love
to watch you guys
82
00:03:10,776 --> 00:03:12,881
for a couple of days
just being yourselves.
83
00:03:12,882 --> 00:03:16,091
You know, like...
You know, like a window
into a frat house.
84
00:03:16,092 --> 00:03:19,094
I want to see how
you behave when you
don't have to behave.
85
00:03:19,095 --> 00:03:20,958
Oh, I'm sorry. Did you think
they're behaving right now?
86
00:03:20,959 --> 00:03:24,410
'Cause I guarantee
one of them has
their pants unbuttoned.
87
00:03:24,411 --> 00:03:26,343
That's how I roll.
Why would we
want to help you?
88
00:03:26,344 --> 00:03:27,930
We all got burned
by your last book.
89
00:03:27,931 --> 00:03:29,622
Yeah, you made everyone
look like a jerk.
90
00:03:29,623 --> 00:03:31,658
Well, not everyone.
91
00:03:31,659 --> 00:03:32,901
I mean, what's
in it for us?
92
00:03:32,902 --> 00:03:34,558
I'll buy you lunch.
93
00:03:34,559 --> 00:03:36,698
Come on, guys.
Free lunch.
94
00:03:36,699 --> 00:03:38,665
Any restaurant in the city?
Sure.
95
00:03:38,666 --> 00:03:40,080
Does it include
a beverage or not?
96
00:03:40,081 --> 00:03:43,567
If that's what it takes, yes.
Do we have a deal?
97
00:03:43,568 --> 00:03:45,914
I'll have a steak burrito
and a large orange drink.
98
00:03:45,915 --> 00:03:47,812
Anywhere in the city!
99
00:03:47,813 --> 00:03:49,435
I said steak.
100
00:03:49,436 --> 00:03:51,299
With a burrito I can
save half for dinner.
101
00:03:51,300 --> 00:03:54,060
Great! I am so excited!
102
00:03:54,061 --> 00:03:56,476
I'll be like Dian Fossey.
103
00:03:57,685 --> 00:04:00,239
That's funny.
104
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:04,450
Dian Fossey was
a woman who watched
what apes do for a living.
105
00:04:04,451 --> 00:04:06,210
What did they do?
Who?
106
00:04:06,211 --> 00:04:07,970
The apes.
They were apes.
107
00:04:07,971 --> 00:04:09,386
But did they make stuff?
No.
108
00:04:09,387 --> 00:04:11,422
So what did they
do for a living?
109
00:04:11,423 --> 00:04:13,218
Mike, go lie down.
110
00:04:17,705 --> 00:04:19,189
Sweep! Sweep!
111
00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:24,159
Guys, come on, please.
Give me something.
112
00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:27,474
You haven't said
a word to each other
in 45 minutes.
113
00:04:28,751 --> 00:04:30,441
Uh...
114
00:04:30,442 --> 00:04:32,133
I'm Mike.
Kenny.
115
00:04:33,031 --> 00:04:34,134
Oh, come on!
116
00:04:34,135 --> 00:04:35,653
What?
This is what we do.
117
00:04:35,654 --> 00:04:37,379
What do you want
us to talk about?
118
00:04:37,380 --> 00:04:41,107
You know, whatever.
Stuff that you guys
normally talk about, okay?
119
00:04:41,108 --> 00:04:42,799
Okay. Okay. Um...
120
00:04:45,975 --> 00:04:48,045
Hey, did you know
that lobsters
have clear blood?
121
00:04:48,046 --> 00:04:49,149
I didn't know
they had blood.
122
00:04:49,150 --> 00:04:51,117
They do.
And it's clear.
Hmm.
123
00:04:51,118 --> 00:04:52,498
I've learned
something new today.
124
00:04:52,499 --> 00:04:53,982
You're welcome.
125
00:04:53,983 --> 00:04:56,364
Guys, now you're
just being ridiculous.
126
00:04:56,365 --> 00:04:58,158
No, it's true. It's clear.
That's pretty crazy, right?
127
00:04:58,159 --> 00:05:00,160
No, no. Not that.
You guys. Come on.
128
00:05:00,161 --> 00:05:03,026
I need you to be more,
you know, guy-y.
129
00:05:03,544 --> 00:05:04,925
Guy-y?
130
00:05:06,236 --> 00:05:08,065
I don't even know
what that means.
131
00:05:08,066 --> 00:05:10,310
Hey, I know.
Where's my burrito?
132
00:05:11,207 --> 00:05:14,866
Fine. Forget it. Boys.
133
00:05:17,731 --> 00:05:20,491
♪ And the home
134
00:05:20,492 --> 00:05:25,325
♪ Of the brave
135
00:05:26,464 --> 00:05:28,085
Play Ker Plunk!
136
00:05:28,086 --> 00:05:31,433
...gonna go low.
That's it.
Careful, careful, careful.
137
00:05:31,434 --> 00:05:32,538
All right, it's all right.
138
00:05:32,539 --> 00:05:35,368
Go high! Go high! Go...
And...
139
00:05:37,164 --> 00:05:38,613
Yes!
Damn it!
140
00:05:38,614 --> 00:05:42,169
Like I said, gentlemen,
us, the Dream Team,
you guys, Angola.
141
00:05:44,792 --> 00:05:48,450
That means eat it in Angola.
I learned it just for this.
142
00:05:48,451 --> 00:05:49,556
Boom.
143
00:05:56,735 --> 00:05:57,702
Set up!
144
00:06:04,260 --> 00:06:06,123
Thank you, sir.
145
00:06:06,124 --> 00:06:08,125
Dr. Brendo!
Paging Dr. Brendo!
146
00:06:08,126 --> 00:06:11,093
Dr. Brendo is now on call.
147
00:06:11,094 --> 00:06:12,267
Scalpel.
148
00:06:12,268 --> 00:06:13,717
Grab the bread-basket.
149
00:06:13,718 --> 00:06:14,959
Yes.
150
00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:16,168
Just dab.
151
00:06:20,518 --> 00:06:24,349
Look at that.
Harvard Medical School,
people. And suction!
152
00:06:24,970 --> 00:06:26,833
All right. Okay.
153
00:06:26,834 --> 00:06:28,352
All right, babe,
take it away.
154
00:06:28,353 --> 00:06:31,390
I am going to remove
this man's wishbone.
155
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,564
No, no, no.
Do the spareribs,
not the wishbone.
156
00:06:33,565 --> 00:06:35,394
Uh...
157
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,568
No, not the writer's cramp.
It rolls under the lip.
158
00:06:37,569 --> 00:06:38,880
Peej, I know what I'm doing.
159
00:06:38,881 --> 00:06:41,262
Okay, sorry. I'm sorry.
160
00:06:43,886 --> 00:06:45,990
Just remove the spareribs.
161
00:06:45,991 --> 00:06:48,165
Well, I'm pretty sure
we all know what
you've had removed.
162
00:06:51,756 --> 00:06:54,447
But you gotta
get the tip of it.
163
00:06:58,141 --> 00:06:59,177
No!
164
00:07:01,593 --> 00:07:02,593
Good work, doctors.
165
00:07:02,594 --> 00:07:04,284
Yes, very steady hands, gentlemen.
166
00:07:04,285 --> 00:07:06,390
Learned it from
a colleague of mine,
Johnnie Walker.
167
00:07:06,391 --> 00:07:07,495
Have you two met?
168
00:07:07,496 --> 00:07:09,359
Perhaps he's at the bar!
169
00:07:09,877 --> 00:07:10,877
Who needs?
170
00:07:10,878 --> 00:07:12,017
Yes, please.
171
00:07:14,261 --> 00:07:15,986
I know it says
ages six and up,
172
00:07:15,987 --> 00:07:18,575
but really, it's
tougher than that.
173
00:07:18,576 --> 00:07:20,749
I know, I know.
It's just...
174
00:07:20,750 --> 00:07:24,891
You don't have to tell me.
I can pick my own pieces,
you know.
175
00:07:24,892 --> 00:07:27,135
Okay. It's just
one game, though.
176
00:07:27,136 --> 00:07:28,826
And we're still
up two to one.
177
00:07:28,827 --> 00:07:30,656
Right, right.
I'm just saying,
you know,
178
00:07:30,657 --> 00:07:32,105
they're just
stupid board games,
179
00:07:32,106 --> 00:07:34,246
so, you know, relax.
180
00:07:35,558 --> 00:07:38,008
Relax? I'm relaxed.
181
00:07:38,009 --> 00:07:41,770
Yeah, but sometimes you get
a little too competitive.
182
00:07:41,771 --> 00:07:44,290
What do you mean?
I'm just as competitive
as everybody else.
183
00:07:44,291 --> 00:07:46,844
Peej, you're
uber-competitive.
184
00:07:46,845 --> 00:07:49,122
You are just as
competitive as I am.
No way.
185
00:07:49,123 --> 00:07:50,986
Oh, my God. You are.
That's so not true.
186
00:07:50,987 --> 00:07:52,401
Yes it is!
Is not.
187
00:07:52,402 --> 00:07:54,093
You're trying to win
this ridiculous argument.
188
00:07:54,094 --> 00:07:55,440
I am not!
189
00:07:56,821 --> 00:07:58,407
Probably.
You see?
190
00:07:58,408 --> 00:08:00,375
You care about winning
just as much as I do.
191
00:08:00,376 --> 00:08:03,343
No, I do not.
I am just trying
to give you
192
00:08:03,344 --> 00:08:05,276
a bit of
constructive criticism,
193
00:08:05,277 --> 00:08:06,485
and if you don't
want to hear it,
194
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,279
that is totally fine.
195
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:09,867
Wow.
And, by the way,
196
00:08:09,868 --> 00:08:12,837
the spareribs are way
harder than they look.
197
00:08:13,423 --> 00:08:14,770
Oh, really?
198
00:08:17,220 --> 00:08:19,256
Yeah, that was really...
199
00:08:19,257 --> 00:08:22,847
What did that wise man say
about friendly
competition again?
200
00:08:25,539 --> 00:08:27,920
So, we kind of
had our first fight.
201
00:08:27,921 --> 00:08:29,749
Bobby thinks I'm
too competitive.
202
00:08:29,750 --> 00:08:32,787
You? No! He's crazy.
203
00:08:32,788 --> 00:08:35,134
No, but he would've
never said anything
if we weren't dating.
204
00:08:35,135 --> 00:08:37,101
I mean, what is it
about guys that when
you start dating them,
205
00:08:37,102 --> 00:08:39,000
they feel free to
have opinions about you?
206
00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:42,521
Well, they're measuring you
against the idea
of their dream girl,
207
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,350
and they've all got one.
Yeah?
208
00:08:44,351 --> 00:08:46,732
Jessica Alba, Heidi Klum,
209
00:08:46,733 --> 00:08:50,667
people not known
for their trash-talking,
or saying, "In your face."
210
00:08:50,668 --> 00:08:52,703
It's so irritating.
211
00:08:52,704 --> 00:08:54,394
The male ego is fragile.
212
00:08:54,395 --> 00:08:57,052
That's why I never
play games
with guys I date.
213
00:08:57,053 --> 00:08:59,710
It always gets weird.
They can never
just play to have fun.
214
00:08:59,711 --> 00:09:01,574
Well, but I'm not a guy.
Not always.
215
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:05,889
And I can totally play
to have fun. He'll see.
Not always?
216
00:09:05,890 --> 00:09:07,235
You look cute today.
217
00:09:07,236 --> 00:09:09,686
Don't. Oh, how's
your article coming?
218
00:09:09,687 --> 00:09:12,481
I don't know.
I don't know what to do.
219
00:09:12,482 --> 00:09:16,624
I've learned nothing
so far. Except
lobsters have clear blood.
220
00:09:16,625 --> 00:09:19,316
That's not really
a Cosmo article.
221
00:09:19,317 --> 00:09:21,974
Oh! But I'm going
to your apartment
to watch Brendo, though.
222
00:09:21,975 --> 00:09:26,012
That should work out for me.
He leads a much sexier life.
223
00:09:29,707 --> 00:09:31,604
So, this is what you
do on your day off?
224
00:09:31,605 --> 00:09:34,677
I'm getting stuff done
around the house.
225
00:09:36,230 --> 00:09:37,265
Cleaning.
226
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,407
Yeah!
227
00:09:41,408 --> 00:09:44,030
Tara wants to go ice skating
at Millennium Park.
228
00:09:44,031 --> 00:09:45,514
Tara! Who is she?
229
00:09:45,515 --> 00:09:47,758
A waitress at the club.
230
00:09:47,759 --> 00:09:52,107
Okay. Waitress,
I like it. I like it.
All right, so what now, huh?
231
00:09:52,108 --> 00:09:53,730
Dude, I can't.
I'm way too busy.
232
00:09:53,731 --> 00:09:55,904
Brendan, you're
doing absolutely nothing.
233
00:09:55,905 --> 00:09:57,837
Bob Fossey didn't
judge those monkeys.
234
00:09:57,838 --> 00:10:01,738
Okay, first of all,
it wasn't Bob,
and secondly...
235
00:10:01,739 --> 00:10:03,222
Never mind.
236
00:10:04,742 --> 00:10:06,708
Hey! I've got an hour,
bud. You ready?
237
00:10:06,709 --> 00:10:07,951
Yeah! Let's do this.
238
00:10:07,952 --> 00:10:09,366
Weird. What's
she doing here?
239
00:10:09,367 --> 00:10:11,195
Watch a couple of monkeys
play Madden '09.
240
00:10:11,196 --> 00:10:12,403
Yeah!
241
00:10:15,338 --> 00:10:16,754
Uh... Uh... Uh...
242
00:10:17,927 --> 00:10:19,307
Beaker!
A vase.
243
00:10:19,308 --> 00:10:20,446
A glass.
244
00:10:20,447 --> 00:10:22,897
Martini! I'd know
that drink anywhere.
245
00:10:22,898 --> 00:10:26,003
Yes! Yes!
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Okay, okay.
246
00:10:26,004 --> 00:10:27,799
Okay, this one is...
247
00:10:29,352 --> 00:10:30,870
Candy Land. Platypus.
248
00:10:30,871 --> 00:10:32,803
Devil! Devil! Devil!
249
00:10:32,804 --> 00:10:33,908
A pig. Uh...
250
00:10:33,909 --> 00:10:35,357
A rooster, you guys.
It's a rooster.
251
00:10:35,358 --> 00:10:36,808
A hairy pig?
252
00:10:37,706 --> 00:10:39,741
Times up!
No!
253
00:10:39,742 --> 00:10:41,087
It's a dragon.
254
00:10:41,088 --> 00:10:41,985
How the hell is
that a dragon, man?
255
00:10:41,986 --> 00:10:44,125
Dragons have wings.
256
00:10:44,126 --> 00:10:46,886
Oh, sorry. I forgot that
dragons have wings,
Iron Maiden guy. Jeez.
257
00:10:46,887 --> 00:10:49,164
Hey, we got two. We got two.
We're in good shape.
258
00:10:49,165 --> 00:10:50,649
It's our turn.
We need three to win.
Good.
259
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,547
Three to win.
260
00:10:52,548 --> 00:10:55,551
Good game, you guys.
That was crazy.
Congratulations.
261
00:10:57,380 --> 00:10:58,380
Your time begins now!
262
00:10:58,381 --> 00:10:59,520
Okay. Uh...
263
00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:02,764
Okay, that is
a bunch of squiggly lines.
264
00:11:02,765 --> 00:11:05,215
Okay. Squiggly
lines under the water!
Squiggly lines in the pool!
265
00:11:05,216 --> 00:11:08,252
Squiggly lines in the ocean!
Eels! It's gotta be eels.
266
00:11:08,253 --> 00:11:11,497
Oh, my gosh, school of fish!
Stingrays! Eels! Seaweed!
267
00:11:11,498 --> 00:11:13,568
Yes! Yes! Right! Right!
268
00:11:13,569 --> 00:11:16,053
Oh, my God. Good call.
I would've never
guessed that one.
269
00:11:16,054 --> 00:11:17,468
Okay... Uh...
270
00:11:17,469 --> 00:11:18,953
This is something
long like a log.
271
00:11:18,954 --> 00:11:20,368
It's got tubes.
Some kind of log tube.
272
00:11:20,369 --> 00:11:22,197
A pole.
A pole?
273
00:11:22,198 --> 00:11:25,269
It's a hot dog!
It's a hot dog, right? Okay.
It's a hot dog with legs.
274
00:11:25,270 --> 00:11:26,374
It's a running hot dog!
275
00:11:26,375 --> 00:11:28,169
A running hot dog.
276
00:11:28,170 --> 00:11:29,653
All right,
he's drawing something new.
What the hell is that?
277
00:11:29,654 --> 00:11:31,275
It's a space ship!
It's a sandwich!
278
00:11:31,276 --> 00:11:33,174
It's a hamburger!
It's a hamburger, right?
279
00:11:33,175 --> 00:11:36,867
Okay, and it's
a hamburger with legs.
And it's a hamburger running!
280
00:11:36,868 --> 00:11:38,869
Where's it going?
It's going to McDonald's,
281
00:11:38,870 --> 00:11:41,423
'cause it's Mayor McCheese.
It's the Hamburglar.
282
00:11:41,424 --> 00:11:42,562
What is it?
What the hell is it?
283
00:11:42,563 --> 00:11:44,393
Time's up!
284
00:11:46,498 --> 00:11:48,983
It's fast food.
285
00:11:51,849 --> 00:11:53,815
Boom goes the dynamite!
286
00:11:53,816 --> 00:11:56,819
"Fast food." Of course.
That's a good drawing.
287
00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:01,202
Why are you high-fiving me?
288
00:12:01,203 --> 00:12:02,859
I don't know.
It was a good game.
289
00:12:02,860 --> 00:12:04,999
That's not how it works.
You're the enemy.
Don't high-five me.
290
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:06,552
There you go.
That's what I'm talking about!
291
00:12:06,553 --> 00:12:09,936
Ooh. It's just
stupid games, right?
We're just having fun.
292
00:12:14,112 --> 00:12:15,354
Hey, what's up?
293
00:12:15,355 --> 00:12:18,426
Hey, does your brother live
north or south of Webster?
294
00:12:18,427 --> 00:12:20,946
South.
South. Got it.
295
00:12:20,947 --> 00:12:24,121
Oh. How's the decathlon going?
Are you being a good sport?
296
00:12:24,122 --> 00:12:28,229
I'm just playing to have fun.
We're losing. It's horrible.
297
00:12:28,230 --> 00:12:30,610
But, hey, I'm gonna prove
that I'm the better man.
298
00:12:30,611 --> 00:12:32,267
Woman. Girl.
299
00:12:32,268 --> 00:12:33,406
Whatever.
300
00:12:33,407 --> 00:12:34,960
Hey, how are the dudes?
301
00:12:34,961 --> 00:12:36,444
Really boring.
302
00:12:36,445 --> 00:12:39,861
As dull as I
thought they were,
they get duller.
303
00:12:39,862 --> 00:12:40,966
Really?
304
00:12:40,967 --> 00:12:43,382
Having said that,
I have high hopes for Andy.
305
00:12:43,383 --> 00:12:44,901
He's got a family
and a full life.
306
00:12:44,902 --> 00:12:46,626
He's going to need
to blow off some steam.
307
00:12:46,627 --> 00:12:48,628
Honey, are you sure
you don't want
to come to the zoo
308
00:12:48,629 --> 00:12:49,802
with me and the kids?
309
00:12:49,803 --> 00:12:52,011
There's absolutely
nothing I'd rather do,
310
00:12:52,012 --> 00:12:56,153
but it's the perfect day
to get on the roof and
clean out those gutters.
311
00:12:56,154 --> 00:12:59,639
Okay. Just be
careful on the ladder.
312
00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:02,056
You know me.
Mayor of Safetyville,
313
00:13:02,057 --> 00:13:06,646
where I
recently passed a bill
demanding more safety.
314
00:13:06,647 --> 00:13:09,166
Savannah, honey?
Where did you put the baby?
315
00:13:09,167 --> 00:13:12,100
Oh, God.
Love you! Savannah...
316
00:13:13,378 --> 00:13:15,897
Remember, I'm a ghost.
Just pretend I'm not here.
317
00:13:15,898 --> 00:13:17,141
Got it.
318
00:13:21,455 --> 00:13:22,732
Okay.
319
00:13:49,932 --> 00:13:54,247
Which letter is just to
the left of the letter C
on a computer keyboard?
320
00:13:56,594 --> 00:13:57,766
Z.
Nope.
321
00:13:57,767 --> 00:13:58,838
Damn it.
322
00:14:00,046 --> 00:14:01,254
X.
Yes.
323
00:14:02,911 --> 00:14:05,533
Who is the Norse
god of thunder?
324
00:14:05,534 --> 00:14:06,706
Ooh!
325
00:14:06,707 --> 00:14:07,880
My main man Thor!
326
00:14:07,881 --> 00:14:09,226
Nerd.
327
00:14:09,227 --> 00:14:10,952
P.J., focus, please.
328
00:14:10,953 --> 00:14:14,543
What alloy is formed
when you combine
tin with lead?
329
00:14:15,371 --> 00:14:17,787
Tin! No, wait. Oh!
330
00:14:19,686 --> 00:14:21,549
Pewter.
Yes!
331
00:14:21,550 --> 00:14:22,757
Tin and lead
makes pewter?
332
00:14:22,758 --> 00:14:23,896
Peej!
333
00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:25,035
Sorry.
I didn't know that.
334
00:14:25,036 --> 00:14:26,934
And, finally,
what was the name
335
00:14:26,935 --> 00:14:30,559
of the robot girl
on the '80s sitcom
Small Wonder?
336
00:14:33,182 --> 00:14:34,976
Vicki. It's Vicki.
337
00:14:34,977 --> 00:14:36,115
That's correct.
338
00:14:36,116 --> 00:14:37,565
It's the best show ever.
339
00:14:37,566 --> 00:14:39,153
Okay, that's it.
340
00:14:39,154 --> 00:14:46,161
And with a final
score of 18 to 17,
this round goes to...
341
00:14:48,715 --> 00:14:50,750
The Angolans!
342
00:14:50,751 --> 00:14:52,787
What a comeback!
What a comeback!
343
00:14:52,788 --> 00:14:54,030
It's like the 49ers!
344
00:14:54,031 --> 00:14:55,203
Nicely done.
345
00:14:55,204 --> 00:14:56,342
I can't believe this.
346
00:14:56,343 --> 00:14:58,793
Which means
the decathlon is tied.
347
00:14:58,794 --> 00:15:02,176
Now, according to
the new rules of the game,
348
00:15:02,177 --> 00:15:04,695
you are going to
play a tiebreaker.
349
00:15:04,696 --> 00:15:08,492
The team that writes down
the most correct answers
in two minutes
350
00:15:08,493 --> 00:15:13,946
wins the championship.
And your time begins now!
351
00:15:13,947 --> 00:15:16,604
Which male tennis star
has the most
grand slam titles?
352
00:15:16,605 --> 00:15:21,505
Okay. Okay.
Well, Ivan Lendl,
Bjorn Borg, Boris Becker?
353
00:15:21,506 --> 00:15:22,610
Rod Laver?
354
00:15:22,611 --> 00:15:23,749
Well, actually,
I was gonna say...
355
00:15:23,750 --> 00:15:24,992
Oh! It's Federer!
356
00:15:24,993 --> 00:15:26,476
You sure?
'Cause I was going
to go Pete Sampras.
357
00:15:26,477 --> 00:15:27,960
No, no, no.
It's Federer.
I'm positive.
358
00:15:27,961 --> 00:15:29,444
Stan Smith.
Okay.
359
00:15:29,445 --> 00:15:32,620
Kenny, I love you,
but stop naming
your tennis shoes!
360
00:15:32,621 --> 00:15:36,589
In the song
My Darling Clementine,
how did Clementine die?
361
00:15:36,590 --> 00:15:37,866
She was hit by a bus.
362
00:15:37,867 --> 00:15:39,972
Dude, they didn't even
have buses back then.
363
00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:41,422
She was swallowed by a horse.
364
00:15:41,423 --> 00:15:42,526
What are you
talking about?
365
00:15:42,527 --> 00:15:43,700
Come on, I know this.
366
00:15:43,701 --> 00:15:45,426
She sat on a muffin.
It's a muffet.
367
00:15:45,427 --> 00:15:47,290
It's a tuffet.
It's the wrong
nursery rhyme.
368
00:15:47,291 --> 00:15:48,498
You're reading
too many Golden Books.
369
00:15:48,499 --> 00:15:50,638
Just hold on a second,
all right?
370
00:15:53,711 --> 00:15:55,712
Guys, we should go Federer.
Okay. Let's do that.
371
00:15:55,713 --> 00:15:57,369
Okay, wait, though.
You thought it was Sampras.
372
00:15:57,370 --> 00:15:58,853
No, but if Bobby's sure,
let's write that down.
373
00:15:58,854 --> 00:16:00,303
But do you really
think it's Sampras?
374
00:16:00,304 --> 00:16:02,167
It doesn't matter.
Let's go with
your answer, hon.
375
00:16:02,168 --> 00:16:04,307
P.J., you gotta
stop doing this.
Doing what?
376
00:16:04,308 --> 00:16:06,447
It's like you're
not even trying.
I'm totally trying.
377
00:16:06,448 --> 00:16:08,207
No, you're not.
Why aren't you trying?
378
00:16:08,208 --> 00:16:11,072
I'm totally trying.
I'm being a team player.
I'm being nice.
379
00:16:11,073 --> 00:16:12,971
Why are you being nice
in the middle
of the decathlon?
380
00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:14,903
Because he told me
I'm too competitive.
381
00:16:14,904 --> 00:16:16,664
Why would you tell her
she's too competitive
382
00:16:16,665 --> 00:16:18,148
in the middle
of the decathlon?
383
00:16:18,149 --> 00:16:19,667
No, I didn't say that.
384
00:16:19,668 --> 00:16:20,909
Uh, you did.
385
00:16:20,910 --> 00:16:22,842
Okay, we don't have
time for this!
386
00:16:22,843 --> 00:16:24,844
You told me to relax.
387
00:16:24,845 --> 00:16:26,985
What is wrong with you?
Why would you
tell her to relax?
388
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,677
No, but dude,
it's 'cause she was,
like, all over me,
389
00:16:29,678 --> 00:16:31,817
and she was making
me pick the spareribs,
390
00:16:31,818 --> 00:16:35,683
but I was like,
"I know how to
play Operation."
391
00:16:35,684 --> 00:16:36,960
Oh, my God!
I'm gonna write
down Rod Laver.
392
00:16:36,961 --> 00:16:38,168
No! No! No!
It's not Rod Laver!
393
00:16:38,169 --> 00:16:39,790
How's it coming?
394
00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:42,034
I'm stuck at the part
where the guy's the miner,
but he's...
395
00:16:42,035 --> 00:16:45,624
Wait! Wait, I got it.
Dude, she drowned.
She totally drowned!
396
00:16:45,625 --> 00:16:47,350
She drowned?
That's excellent!
397
00:16:47,351 --> 00:16:49,110
Write it down.
398
00:16:49,111 --> 00:16:52,631
Is that what this is about?
Because I told you
to pick the spareribs?
399
00:16:52,632 --> 00:16:55,737
Well,
when you put it like that,
it makes it sound silly.
400
00:16:55,738 --> 00:16:57,946
In Bobby's defense,
a guy doesn't want
to be told
401
00:16:57,947 --> 00:16:59,120
what to do in front
of his buddies.
402
00:16:59,121 --> 00:17:00,949
It makes him seem
a little bit like a wuss.
403
00:17:00,950 --> 00:17:04,574
But Bobby's not like that.
He's not, like, a "guy guy."
404
00:17:04,575 --> 00:17:07,887
See, that also makes
me sound like a wuss.
Am I right, Kenny?
405
00:17:07,888 --> 00:17:10,994
A little bit.
But in P.J.'s defense,
you told her to relax
406
00:17:10,995 --> 00:17:12,306
in the middle
of the decathlon.
407
00:17:12,307 --> 00:17:14,273
Speaking of which,
is it Sampras or Federer?
408
00:17:14,274 --> 00:17:16,689
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to
boss you around.
409
00:17:16,690 --> 00:17:19,002
No, it's okay.
It's okay.
I overreacted.
410
00:17:19,003 --> 00:17:21,280
I'm sorry that I
told you to relax.
411
00:17:21,281 --> 00:17:23,213
And I don't think
you're too competitive.
Really?
412
00:17:23,214 --> 00:17:25,871
No. You're not
too competitive.
You know who is? Sampras.
413
00:17:25,872 --> 00:17:27,700
Or is it Federer?
Time's up!
414
00:17:27,701 --> 00:17:29,288
Pencils down.
Turn in your answers. What?
415
00:17:29,289 --> 00:17:31,083
Okay, I know it's
Sampras. I know it.
416
00:17:31,084 --> 00:17:32,257
Wait, we just have
to write it down.
417
00:17:32,258 --> 00:17:34,605
Sorry. Too late.
418
00:17:35,502 --> 00:17:40,024
Okay, now,
this team got one.
419
00:17:41,646 --> 00:17:45,511
And this team got...
None.
420
00:17:45,512 --> 00:17:47,479
How is that possible?
421
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:48,928
None?
422
00:17:48,929 --> 00:17:51,655
None? That's
one less than one!
423
00:17:51,656 --> 00:17:54,313
Which means we won!
424
00:17:54,314 --> 00:17:57,317
We won! We won!
425
00:17:58,939 --> 00:18:01,838
Free booze for a month!
And you know what?
426
00:18:01,839 --> 00:18:04,634
Daddy's thirsty now,
so pay up, bitches!
427
00:18:04,635 --> 00:18:06,705
It was fun, huh?
428
00:18:06,706 --> 00:18:08,603
I'm gonna get
so much expensive liquor
even if I don't like it!
429
00:18:13,609 --> 00:18:14,989
Ah!
430
00:18:14,990 --> 00:18:18,200
Pete Sampras.
It's Pete Sampras.
431
00:18:19,719 --> 00:18:22,687
Why do I have
to be on the team
with a couple?
432
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,070
Wow.
433
00:18:28,728 --> 00:18:31,109
God, that's really
kind of weird.
434
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:34,388
I think I'm just
getting used to the fact
that we're, like, a couple.
435
00:18:34,389 --> 00:18:38,599
Yeah. Yeah, me, too.
I mean, maybe that's
kind of part of it.
436
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:41,360
When you told me
what to do before
we were a couple,
437
00:18:41,361 --> 00:18:44,052
I always had
the option of
ignoring you.
438
00:18:44,053 --> 00:18:46,883
Well, I mean,
you can still do that.
439
00:18:46,884 --> 00:18:48,437
Can I? Really?
440
00:18:49,542 --> 00:18:51,612
Well, choose wisely.
441
00:18:51,613 --> 00:18:52,854
Clearly.
442
00:18:52,855 --> 00:18:56,893
Boom! Oh!
And the streak continues!
443
00:18:56,894 --> 00:19:00,517
Ah! I just took your money,
Dream Teamer.
Mmm-hmm.
444
00:19:00,518 --> 00:19:01,967
That's good.
Keep going with it.
445
00:19:01,968 --> 00:19:03,624
Oh, I intend to.
446
00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:05,867
Bong! Hello!
447
00:19:05,868 --> 00:19:08,076
All right. Can we
please get a moratorium
on the high fives?
448
00:19:08,077 --> 00:19:09,768
There have been
way too many
of them lately.
449
00:19:09,769 --> 00:19:11,356
I would second that.
Totally agree with that.
450
00:19:11,357 --> 00:19:14,600
Okay, okay,
but I think we
should do one more.
451
00:19:14,601 --> 00:19:17,914
Two, three, four, five.
Oh! Hello.
452
00:19:17,915 --> 00:19:21,505
Bang it! Come on!
Don't leave me hanging!
453
00:19:22,230 --> 00:19:23,231
Okay, no more. I'm up.
454
00:19:24,784 --> 00:19:25,956
Hey, you guys.
455
00:19:25,957 --> 00:19:27,579
Hey!
456
00:19:27,580 --> 00:19:31,479
So, I turned in
my article today and
I brought a copy
457
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:34,689
so that there would
be no surprises.
458
00:19:34,690 --> 00:19:37,347
Burrito. Orange drink.
459
00:19:37,348 --> 00:19:40,143
All right,
"What He's Really Like
When You're Not Around."
460
00:19:40,144 --> 00:19:42,525
What are we like?
Totally awesome, right?
461
00:19:42,526 --> 00:19:44,803
"Sorry, ladies.
They're complete duds."
462
00:19:44,804 --> 00:19:45,838
What? What?
463
00:19:45,839 --> 00:19:47,392
Come on! Really?
464
00:19:47,393 --> 00:19:49,394
Come on, that's so lame!
Here we go.
465
00:19:49,395 --> 00:19:52,120
Okay, "When we're not around,
they just shut down.
466
00:19:52,121 --> 00:19:54,709
"They power
down like robots."
467
00:19:54,710 --> 00:19:57,056
Robots?
Like good robots
or evil robots?
468
00:19:57,057 --> 00:19:59,507
Well, I mean,
all robots start off good,
but, you know...
469
00:19:59,508 --> 00:20:04,305
No, no, no, no, no.
Here is the thing.
You guys are onto something.
470
00:20:04,306 --> 00:20:06,134
"So I decided
to give it a try.
471
00:20:06,135 --> 00:20:10,277
"I spent an entire day
on the couch in my sweats,
watching old movies."
472
00:20:10,278 --> 00:20:11,899
Sounds like
a pretty good day.
Yeah.
473
00:20:11,900 --> 00:20:14,419
I'm telling you,
my skin has never
felt better.
474
00:20:14,420 --> 00:20:15,558
Right?
475
00:20:15,559 --> 00:20:17,284
"We spend so much
time trying to achieve
476
00:20:17,285 --> 00:20:20,114
"that we've
forgotten the benefits
of powering down.
477
00:20:20,115 --> 00:20:26,224
"I encourage you ladies
to take some time each day
just to do nothing."
478
00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:28,950
It's completely Zen.
That's all I'm saying.
479
00:20:28,951 --> 00:20:33,127
I'm totally confused.
Are we totally lame
or are we totally kickass?
480
00:20:33,128 --> 00:20:34,784
You're everything
all at once.
481
00:20:34,785 --> 00:20:36,648
Wow, we're deep.
482
00:20:36,649 --> 00:20:38,719
Powering down's
a beautiful thing.
483
00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,376
I can't wait till
my son's old enough
484
00:20:40,377 --> 00:20:42,654
and I can teach him
how to power down properly.
485
00:20:42,655 --> 00:20:44,276
Well, you are the master.
486
00:20:44,277 --> 00:20:46,486
I can power down
in milliseconds.
487
00:20:47,729 --> 00:20:50,766
Just did it. And again.
488
00:20:53,597 --> 00:20:54,597
That was a double one.
489
00:20:54,598 --> 00:20:55,943
How's that burrito?
490
00:20:55,944 --> 00:20:58,533
This is gonna put me
totally to sleep.
36717
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