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1
00:00:21,711 --> 00:00:23,712
At some point,
just like athletes,
2
00:00:23,713 --> 00:00:25,852
we all have to deal
with being released.
3
00:00:25,853 --> 00:00:28,027
Released from a job,
a relationship.
4
00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:30,615
The question becomes,
how do we respond?
5
00:00:30,616 --> 00:00:32,169
Hey, you know what?
6
00:00:32,170 --> 00:00:34,309
I have an announcement
to make.
7
00:00:34,310 --> 00:00:35,862
On the heels of my
breakup with Wendy,
8
00:00:35,863 --> 00:00:37,622
I've decided that for
the foreseeable future,
9
00:00:37,623 --> 00:00:40,143
I will no longer be
consuming any alcohol.
10
00:00:41,524 --> 00:00:42,696
I don't understand.
11
00:00:42,697 --> 00:00:43,766
Must not have
heard him right.
12
00:00:43,767 --> 00:00:45,113
It is loud in here,
isn't it?
13
00:00:45,114 --> 00:00:48,116
Yeah, he used
a lot of big words.
14
00:00:48,117 --> 00:00:49,634
Talk normal.
15
00:00:49,635 --> 00:00:51,360
Look, every time I've
broken up with Wendy
in the past,
16
00:00:51,361 --> 00:00:53,190
I always go on
some crazy bender,
17
00:00:53,191 --> 00:00:55,019
and it just makes me
more depressed.
18
00:00:55,020 --> 00:00:57,884
So this time, I figured,
"Lay off the booze,
see what happens."
19
00:00:57,885 --> 00:00:59,886
I think I know
what'll happen.
20
00:00:59,887 --> 00:01:01,853
You'll want booze.
Yeah.
21
00:01:01,854 --> 00:01:05,271
Hey. Mike,
Bobby, Brendan.
22
00:01:05,272 --> 00:01:06,720
Kenny.
Uh-huh.
23
00:01:06,721 --> 00:01:07,997
Okay, I'm gonna
go get a drink.
24
00:01:07,998 --> 00:01:09,792
I'll come with.
All right.
25
00:01:09,793 --> 00:01:11,518
Complete waste
of a breakup.
26
00:01:11,519 --> 00:01:14,073
It's borderline
un-American.
27
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,558
Oh, my God.
Look away.
Look away.
28
00:01:16,559 --> 00:01:18,801
I just made eye
contact with Keith Luger.
29
00:01:18,802 --> 00:01:20,113
Keith Luger
from Northwestern?
30
00:01:20,114 --> 00:01:21,356
And I think
he saw me.
31
00:01:21,357 --> 00:01:22,874
Oh, my God.
Is he coming
over here?
32
00:01:22,875 --> 00:01:24,186
'Cause I think he's
coming over here.
33
00:01:24,187 --> 00:01:25,739
Calm down.
34
00:01:25,740 --> 00:01:27,051
The guy is
harmless, okay?
35
00:01:27,052 --> 00:01:29,674
He ran black and white
movie night, for God's sake.
36
00:01:29,675 --> 00:01:31,262
Hey! Hey!
37
00:01:31,263 --> 00:01:32,401
Keith.
38
00:01:32,402 --> 00:01:33,782
Fancy meeting
you two here.
39
00:01:33,783 --> 00:01:36,509
Keith Luger.
Wow.
40
00:01:36,510 --> 00:01:38,304
This is just like being
back in college, right?
41
00:01:38,305 --> 00:01:41,859
Yeah, except you're
not wearing your bright
orange suspenders.
42
00:01:41,860 --> 00:01:43,516
Oh, guess again.
43
00:01:44,725 --> 00:01:45,828
That's amazing.
44
00:01:45,829 --> 00:01:47,865
So what brings
you gals here?
45
00:01:47,866 --> 00:01:49,246
You know,
we actually
live right nearby.
46
00:01:49,247 --> 00:01:50,385
You're kidding.
Me, too.
47
00:01:50,386 --> 00:01:52,628
Not me,
for much longer,
48
00:01:52,629 --> 00:01:56,564
because my company
has transferred me
to the Orient.
49
00:01:57,082 --> 00:01:59,083
The Orient.
50
00:01:59,084 --> 00:02:01,948
Just got transferred
to town. I'm in computers.
Information technology.
51
00:02:01,949 --> 00:02:03,467
Really?
That's shocking.
52
00:02:03,468 --> 00:02:06,263
Yeah. I'm an I.T. guy.
Guess that makes me "it."
53
00:02:07,541 --> 00:02:08,610
I.T. It.
54
00:02:08,611 --> 00:02:10,059
Yeah. Nice.
55
00:02:10,060 --> 00:02:11,440
Oh, Keith.
56
00:02:11,441 --> 00:02:12,924
It was nice
seeing you.
57
00:02:12,925 --> 00:02:14,133
Oh, wait.
Let me grab
you gals a drink.
58
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:15,755
Oh, no.
59
00:02:15,756 --> 00:02:18,344
Oh, no, no.
That would actually
be really sweet.
60
00:02:18,345 --> 00:02:20,415
Thank you.
61
00:02:20,416 --> 00:02:23,003
Oh, I'll have
a Scotch on the rocks.
She'll have a chardonnay.
62
00:02:23,004 --> 00:02:25,040
Great. Okay, great.
Be right back.
Okay, great. Bye.
63
00:02:25,041 --> 00:02:27,663
That's just
so sweet.
64
00:02:27,664 --> 00:02:30,010
What is wrong with you?
Why do you have to
be so nice to people?
65
00:02:30,011 --> 00:02:31,805
What do you want me to do,
kick him in the neck?
66
00:02:31,806 --> 00:02:33,462
You know,
you're kind
of a snob.
67
00:02:33,463 --> 00:02:34,670
He's a perfectly
nice guy.
68
00:02:34,671 --> 00:02:35,844
He's annoying.
69
00:02:35,845 --> 00:02:37,673
He's a little annoying.
70
00:02:37,674 --> 00:02:39,744
Look, he means well.
He's new in town.
71
00:02:39,745 --> 00:02:41,332
He probably doesn't
have a lot of friends.
72
00:02:41,333 --> 00:02:43,955
I don't think that's
because he's new in town.
73
00:02:43,956 --> 00:02:46,269
How about now?
Are you drinking now?
74
00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:48,064
Nope.
75
00:02:49,859 --> 00:02:51,170
How about now?
76
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:53,724
As fascinating as this is,
I'm going to the bathroom.
77
00:02:53,725 --> 00:02:55,415
Ah, good.
I'll come with you.
78
00:02:55,416 --> 00:02:56,692
I don't want you
to go with me.
79
00:02:56,693 --> 00:02:58,073
I need to go
to the bathroom.
80
00:02:58,074 --> 00:02:59,385
Come on.
It'll be fun.
81
00:02:59,386 --> 00:03:01,181
This is disturbing
on many levels.
82
00:03:04,045 --> 00:03:07,600
All right,
say we're all out ordering
brandied apples. Are you in?
83
00:03:07,601 --> 00:03:10,637
Hey, look. I...
84
00:03:10,638 --> 00:03:13,433
I couldn't say
anything in front of Mike,
but I need your advice.
85
00:03:13,434 --> 00:03:16,816
Oh. I'm not good
with that kind
of responsibility.
86
00:03:16,817 --> 00:03:18,266
Why don't you
ask P.J.?
87
00:03:18,267 --> 00:03:20,440
No, no. I can't.
It involves
a professional source.
88
00:03:20,441 --> 00:03:22,339
P.J.'s a
rival reporter.
89
00:03:22,340 --> 00:03:24,306
Come on, please.
90
00:03:24,307 --> 00:03:25,514
All right.
91
00:03:25,515 --> 00:03:27,309
Okay, so I just
found out
92
00:03:27,310 --> 00:03:30,485
there's gonna be a
shake-up in the Cubs'
front office this week.
93
00:03:30,486 --> 00:03:31,589
Mike's getting fired.
94
00:03:31,590 --> 00:03:32,797
Ouch.
95
00:03:32,798 --> 00:03:35,110
So the question
is do we tell him
96
00:03:35,111 --> 00:03:37,526
or should we let him
find out on his own?
97
00:03:37,527 --> 00:03:39,390
Oh, see?
98
00:03:39,391 --> 00:03:41,081
This is why I don't
like responsibility.
99
00:03:41,082 --> 00:03:43,049
I'm getting all sweaty.
100
00:03:43,050 --> 00:03:46,190
Calm down.
Look, you know Mike
as well as anyone, okay?
101
00:03:46,191 --> 00:03:48,228
What do you think
he would want?
102
00:03:50,264 --> 00:03:51,920
I say no.
He's got way
too much pride.
103
00:03:51,921 --> 00:03:53,266
He'd want to tell us
on his own terms.
104
00:03:53,267 --> 00:03:54,957
You gotta leave
the man his dignity.
105
00:03:54,958 --> 00:03:58,478
Drinky, drinky.
Yum, yum, yum.
Who's a nummy nummy?
106
00:03:58,479 --> 00:04:01,274
I like you.
107
00:04:01,275 --> 00:04:04,588
Yes, he's an inspiration
to children everywhere.
108
00:04:04,589 --> 00:04:07,487
Okay, here we go.
109
00:04:07,488 --> 00:04:08,833
Drinks for the sweet.
110
00:04:08,834 --> 00:04:10,697
That is really
nice of you.
111
00:04:10,698 --> 00:04:12,975
But we actually
have to get back
to our friends now.
112
00:04:12,976 --> 00:04:14,632
Oh, yeah.
Me, too.
113
00:04:14,633 --> 00:04:16,427
I'll let you go,
but great seeing
you guys.
114
00:04:16,428 --> 00:04:17,739
Yeah, it was
great seeing you.
115
00:04:17,740 --> 00:04:19,361
Okay. Bye.
All right.
116
00:04:19,362 --> 00:04:20,569
Yeah.
117
00:04:20,570 --> 00:04:22,261
See?
Totally painless.
118
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:23,779
P.J.?
Yeah?
119
00:04:23,780 --> 00:04:25,678
Uh...
120
00:04:25,679 --> 00:04:27,507
I was just wondering if maybe
you want to grab dinner some
night this week.
121
00:04:27,508 --> 00:04:30,683
Oh, sure. I'd love to
have dinner with you.
122
00:04:30,684 --> 00:04:33,858
Hang on.
Let me
give you my card.
123
00:04:33,859 --> 00:04:35,998
You should give me a call.
I will. Thanks.
All right, bye.
124
00:04:35,999 --> 00:04:37,379
I'll call you. Bye.
125
00:04:37,380 --> 00:04:38,691
Bye.
126
00:04:38,692 --> 00:04:40,382
You see what
being nice gets you?
127
00:04:40,383 --> 00:04:43,212
What? It's one dinner.
128
00:04:43,213 --> 00:04:46,146
Some of us were raised
to be kind to those in need.
129
00:04:46,147 --> 00:04:47,216
Hey, Peej,
grab me a beer,
will you?
130
00:04:47,217 --> 00:04:49,288
Get your own.
131
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,256
What? You got two legs.
You're closer.
132
00:04:52,878 --> 00:04:54,154
Boat.
133
00:04:54,155 --> 00:04:55,467
Come on.
134
00:04:57,089 --> 00:04:58,469
Sorry, guys.
135
00:04:58,470 --> 00:04:59,781
That's like six hands
in a row he's won.
136
00:04:59,782 --> 00:05:01,403
Yeah, what is
up with that?
137
00:05:01,404 --> 00:05:03,474
I'm telling you,
I think it's this
whole not-drinking thing.
138
00:05:03,475 --> 00:05:05,200
I mean, this week
has been amazing.
139
00:05:05,201 --> 00:05:08,237
Things taste different.
They smell different.
I'm dreaming again.
140
00:05:08,238 --> 00:05:10,032
Adults don't dream.
141
00:05:10,033 --> 00:05:12,828
I'm telling you,
I never knew my brain could
function at this capacity.
142
00:05:12,829 --> 00:05:16,280
Wait. Are you telling
me you can do
complex math problems?
143
00:05:16,281 --> 00:05:17,385
I guess.
144
00:05:17,386 --> 00:05:19,284
What's nine
times seven?
Sixty-three.
145
00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:21,561
Wow.
146
00:05:21,562 --> 00:05:24,668
Hey, Peej,
how'd that mercy date go
with your old college buddy?
147
00:05:24,669 --> 00:05:26,325
Come on.
It wasn't a mercy date.
148
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,567
It was a mercy date.
149
00:05:27,568 --> 00:05:29,224
Hell, I have a
mercy marriage.
150
00:05:29,225 --> 00:05:30,743
All right, it was a little
bit of a mercy date,
but it was fine.
151
00:05:30,744 --> 00:05:32,400
He was
a perfect gentleman.
152
00:05:32,401 --> 00:05:33,849
Now when he calls,
I'll let him down easy,
153
00:05:33,850 --> 00:05:35,817
and, you know,
we'll all live
happily ever after.
154
00:05:35,818 --> 00:05:37,784
Wait. You went out
with him Sunday?
155
00:05:37,785 --> 00:05:38,923
Yep.
156
00:05:38,924 --> 00:05:42,617
That's four days ago.
157
00:05:42,618 --> 00:05:44,791
What, are you gonna pull
the four-day rule on me?
158
00:05:44,792 --> 00:05:46,966
What, I'm sure he had
a busy week at work.
159
00:05:46,967 --> 00:05:48,692
Sure,
he was busy.
160
00:05:48,693 --> 00:05:50,590
Well, I mean,
he's new there.
161
00:05:50,591 --> 00:05:52,212
All right, look on
the bright side.
162
00:05:52,213 --> 00:05:53,662
Now you don't have to
deal with the guy, right?
163
00:05:53,663 --> 00:05:56,803
Yeah, I guess.
164
00:05:56,804 --> 00:06:00,497
The most difficult kind
of release is the one
you are not expecting.
165
00:06:00,498 --> 00:06:02,878
In its own weird way,
it's like a mini
death of sorts,
166
00:06:02,879 --> 00:06:05,950
complete with
all the different
stages of grieving.
167
00:06:05,951 --> 00:06:07,331
No messages.
168
00:06:07,332 --> 00:06:09,022
Denial, for instance.
169
00:06:09,023 --> 00:06:11,300
You know, I am sure
he's gonna call.
170
00:06:11,301 --> 00:06:14,718
I would love it if he
didn't, but you know,
he's gonna call.
171
00:06:14,719 --> 00:06:16,133
Yeah.
Sure.
172
00:06:16,134 --> 00:06:17,514
Sure, dude.
Totally. Makes sense.
173
00:06:17,515 --> 00:06:19,032
Hey. Sorry I'm late.
174
00:06:19,033 --> 00:06:20,275
Hey. What's up?
Hey.
175
00:06:20,276 --> 00:06:21,622
I had a really
rough day.
176
00:06:22,761 --> 00:06:25,038
I'm a little off.
177
00:06:25,039 --> 00:06:26,523
What the hell.
I got fired.
178
00:06:26,524 --> 00:06:27,903
Oh, man.
179
00:06:27,904 --> 00:06:29,215
Oh, God.
180
00:06:29,216 --> 00:06:31,943
People can also
respond with despair.
181
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:33,702
Yeah.
182
00:06:33,703 --> 00:06:35,773
I don't believe it.
183
00:06:35,774 --> 00:06:37,430
They fired a bunch of us.
184
00:06:37,431 --> 00:06:39,052
Apparently it's
been in the works
for a while.
185
00:06:39,053 --> 00:06:42,193
Yeah, I actually
heard something
a couple days ago.
186
00:06:42,194 --> 00:06:43,850
I'm really sorry, buddy.
187
00:06:43,851 --> 00:06:45,542
You did?
Who told you?
188
00:06:45,543 --> 00:06:46,853
Sorry.
It's confidential.
189
00:06:46,854 --> 00:06:48,199
Oh, bite me.
190
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,615
Wait a minute.
I'm sorry.
191
00:06:49,616 --> 00:06:51,686
Did you say you
heard something about
me a couple days ago,
192
00:06:51,687 --> 00:06:52,894
and you didn't
tell me about it?
193
00:06:52,895 --> 00:06:56,311
Yeah, because I thought...
194
00:06:56,312 --> 00:06:58,417
No, man.
No, you didn't.
195
00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,557
You couldn't have
just thought,
196
00:07:00,558 --> 00:07:02,179
because if you'd thought
for just one sec,
you would have told me.
197
00:07:02,180 --> 00:07:04,146
Dude, come on.
What good would
that have done?
198
00:07:04,147 --> 00:07:05,631
Oh, I don't know.
I would have been
prepared for it,
199
00:07:05,632 --> 00:07:07,702
done something
to save my job.
200
00:07:07,703 --> 00:07:10,221
You know, at least
I could have quit
and kept my self-respect.
201
00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:12,327
Mike...
202
00:07:12,328 --> 00:07:14,329
And then, of course,
there's the old standby.
Anger.
203
00:07:14,330 --> 00:07:15,882
You know what, man?
I'm going home.
204
00:07:15,883 --> 00:07:17,919
It's nice to know
who my friends are.
205
00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,335
Mike.
Mike.
206
00:07:30,070 --> 00:07:31,967
Keith Luger hasn't
called you yet?
207
00:07:31,968 --> 00:07:33,935
Well, he's probably
just having
a busy week at work.
208
00:07:33,936 --> 00:07:35,799
That's what I said.
209
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,352
You really think so, right?
210
00:07:37,353 --> 00:07:38,664
Sure. How many
days has it been?
211
00:07:38,665 --> 00:07:40,183
Five.
Oh.
212
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:45,325
Well, I don't
understand why you care.
You don't even like him.
213
00:07:45,326 --> 00:07:48,156
No, I know that.
That's not the point,
you know?
214
00:07:48,157 --> 00:07:50,676
I mean, even when
you're not interested
in somebody, you call them.
215
00:07:50,677 --> 00:07:52,367
You tell them
what a nice time you had,
216
00:07:52,368 --> 00:07:54,403
and then you say
you're gonna be busy
for a few weeks.
217
00:07:54,404 --> 00:07:57,234
You lie.
It's common
courtesy, Steph.
218
00:07:57,235 --> 00:07:59,581
Yeah, and you were
doing him a favor.
219
00:07:59,582 --> 00:08:03,483
Exactly. And how does
he repay that kindness?
With rudeness.
220
00:08:05,243 --> 00:08:07,037
You know what?
221
00:08:07,038 --> 00:08:09,073
I'm gonna take
the high road.
222
00:08:09,074 --> 00:08:14,009
I am gonna call him
and tell him what
a nice time I had.
223
00:08:14,010 --> 00:08:17,497
Teach him a little thing
or two about manners,
you know what I'm saying?
224
00:08:18,359 --> 00:08:20,464
Hi, Keith.
It's P.J.
225
00:08:20,465 --> 00:08:22,604
Yeah, well...
226
00:08:22,605 --> 00:08:25,815
Oh, okay, well, I guess
I just beat you to it then,
didn't I?
227
00:08:26,713 --> 00:08:27,747
Uh-huh.
228
00:08:27,748 --> 00:08:31,371
Okay. Great. Bye.
229
00:08:31,372 --> 00:08:32,994
We're going out
on Saturday night.
230
00:08:32,995 --> 00:08:34,168
What?
231
00:08:36,274 --> 00:08:37,792
Wait, wait, wait.
232
00:08:37,793 --> 00:08:39,932
This is a guy you're not
remotely interested in,
233
00:08:39,933 --> 00:08:44,006
yet somehow you
ended up calling him
and agreed to a second date.
234
00:08:44,903 --> 00:08:45,972
Pretty much.
235
00:08:45,973 --> 00:08:47,318
Wow. This guy's good.
236
00:08:47,319 --> 00:08:49,667
Meredith was good.
Now look at me.
237
00:08:50,564 --> 00:08:52,116
Get out.
238
00:08:52,117 --> 00:08:54,049
You know what?
On your next date,
239
00:08:54,050 --> 00:08:55,844
don't reveal too much
about yourself,
all right?
240
00:08:55,845 --> 00:08:57,916
That's what I did
with Wendy, and...
241
00:09:00,470 --> 00:09:01,541
Yeah.
242
00:09:02,956 --> 00:09:04,853
Still not drinking?
243
00:09:04,854 --> 00:09:06,337
Still not drinking.
244
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:08,513
I'll get another pitcher
just in case.
245
00:09:09,721 --> 00:09:11,101
Hey, guys.
Hey.
246
00:09:11,102 --> 00:09:13,206
Wow. Silent Bob.
247
00:09:13,207 --> 00:09:14,518
Anything you don't
want to tell me?
248
00:09:14,519 --> 00:09:16,520
Like have you
talked to my doctor?
249
00:09:16,521 --> 00:09:19,040
'Cause if I have ball cancer,
don't tell me.
Just let me figure it out.
250
00:09:19,041 --> 00:09:21,939
Come on, dude.
The guy's apologized,
like, a million times.
251
00:09:21,940 --> 00:09:24,355
And didn't we agree
that nobody was allowed
to say ball cancer?
252
00:09:24,356 --> 00:09:25,875
I've stuck
by that rule.
253
00:09:28,084 --> 00:09:29,810
I'm going to
throw some darts.
254
00:09:31,778 --> 00:09:33,917
Try throwing them
up in the air,
and see what happens.
255
00:09:33,918 --> 00:09:37,058
Look, we'll talk to him, okay?
We'll make him forgive you.
256
00:09:37,059 --> 00:09:39,405
I don't want him
to forgive me.
I didn't do anything wrong.
257
00:09:39,406 --> 00:09:42,650
Boy, how many times did
those words come out
of my mouth to Wendy?
258
00:09:42,651 --> 00:09:43,755
Now?
259
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,101
Happy as a clam, man.
260
00:09:46,102 --> 00:09:48,656
Do you know
the suicide rate
among clams?
261
00:09:53,316 --> 00:09:55,214
You can't stay mad
at the guy forever.
262
00:09:55,215 --> 00:09:56,422
Sure, I can.
263
00:09:56,423 --> 00:09:57,768
He's dead
to me now.
264
00:09:57,769 --> 00:10:00,012
You know who he is?
He's Fredo.
265
00:10:00,013 --> 00:10:01,289
He broke my heart.
266
00:10:01,290 --> 00:10:02,290
Maybe he was just trying to
protect your pride.
267
00:10:02,291 --> 00:10:03,912
Did you ever think of that?
268
00:10:03,913 --> 00:10:06,915
No. Anybody who knows
me knows I would
have wanted to know.
269
00:10:06,916 --> 00:10:08,330
It's as simple as that.
270
00:10:08,331 --> 00:10:10,470
True, but he feels
really bad about it.
271
00:10:10,471 --> 00:10:12,645
You know, I don't care
how Bobby feels
right now, okay?
272
00:10:12,646 --> 00:10:15,338
I'm a little more concerned
about myself at the moment.
273
00:10:17,133 --> 00:10:19,342
Mike, look...
274
00:10:23,484 --> 00:10:25,969
You gotta know
it's gonna be okay.
275
00:10:25,970 --> 00:10:27,798
How? How am I supposed
to know that, okay?
276
00:10:27,799 --> 00:10:30,490
I've never been
fired before.
277
00:10:30,491 --> 00:10:32,596
Yeah, that's right, okay?
I don't have a job,
278
00:10:32,597 --> 00:10:34,978
and I don't have
the slightest clue
what to do about it.
279
00:10:34,979 --> 00:10:39,016
Mike, look, I know this sucks,
but I promise you,
you're gonna get another job.
280
00:10:39,017 --> 00:10:41,260
I have to, and soon.
281
00:10:41,261 --> 00:10:43,643
How else am I supposed
to maintain this lifestyle?
282
00:10:45,783 --> 00:10:48,578
Yeah, I can see
where that
might be a concern.
283
00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,516
Hey, so where are you going
on your big date tonight?
284
00:10:56,517 --> 00:10:58,829
I don't know.
Hopefully somewhere cheap.
285
00:10:58,830 --> 00:11:02,558
You know, so I don't feel
guilty when I tell him I
never want to see him again.
286
00:11:03,248 --> 00:11:04,490
Does this look good?
287
00:11:04,491 --> 00:11:05,767
Really good.
288
00:11:05,768 --> 00:11:07,080
Oh, crap.
289
00:11:08,875 --> 00:11:11,393
Hey, so did you
talk to Mike yet?
290
00:11:11,394 --> 00:11:14,362
Uh... Oh, yes.
291
00:11:14,363 --> 00:11:16,398
Yes, I did.
292
00:11:16,399 --> 00:11:18,780
Good. So then you
explained to him
293
00:11:18,781 --> 00:11:20,540
that I talked to you
about it first
294
00:11:20,541 --> 00:11:23,198
and that we're both
really, really sorry.
295
00:11:23,199 --> 00:11:27,825
Yes, that is exactly
what I said to him
when I spoke to him.
296
00:11:29,412 --> 00:11:31,172
You're not even
trying to lie.
297
00:11:31,173 --> 00:11:32,760
Yes, I am.
298
00:11:32,761 --> 00:11:36,453
Come on, man.
You're really hanging
me out to dry here.
299
00:11:36,454 --> 00:11:39,490
It doesn't serve anybody
for Mike to be
pissed at both of us.
300
00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:41,872
It's much better if I can
act as a go-between.
301
00:11:41,873 --> 00:11:43,218
Better? For who?
302
00:11:43,219 --> 00:11:45,324
It's paid off already.
303
00:11:45,325 --> 00:11:48,154
Now that I've talked to him,
I totally understand
what's going on.
304
00:11:48,155 --> 00:11:49,293
Yeah? What?
305
00:11:49,294 --> 00:11:52,020
It's simple. Mike feels
worthless right now.
306
00:11:52,021 --> 00:11:54,436
I mean,
he's never been fired.
He doesn't know what to do.
307
00:11:54,437 --> 00:11:55,748
Let's get him
a job interview.
308
00:11:55,749 --> 00:11:57,508
I mean, you know people
in other front offices, right?
309
00:11:57,509 --> 00:11:58,682
Well, yeah.
Of course.
310
00:11:58,683 --> 00:12:00,304
Great. Make some calls.
311
00:12:00,305 --> 00:12:02,997
Doesn't even
matter what sport.
Just get him an interview.
312
00:12:02,998 --> 00:12:05,516
Seriously, it will
boost his spirits.
313
00:12:05,517 --> 00:12:08,003
Yeah. I'll see
what I can do.
314
00:12:08,935 --> 00:12:10,314
Still too hot?
315
00:12:10,315 --> 00:12:12,075
Kind of smokin'.
Smokin'.
316
00:12:12,076 --> 00:12:13,939
Damn.
317
00:12:13,940 --> 00:12:17,045
Try a turtleneck.
Or some scuba gear.
318
00:12:20,394 --> 00:12:22,602
As painful as
it is to be released,
319
00:12:22,603 --> 00:12:26,468
it is no picnic being the one
doing the releasing, either.
320
00:12:26,469 --> 00:12:29,851
The trick is to try and do it
as gently as possible.
321
00:12:29,852 --> 00:12:32,647
It was really good
seeing you again.
322
00:12:32,648 --> 00:12:34,442
And I had a
really fun time.
323
00:12:34,443 --> 00:12:36,306
I know.
324
00:12:36,307 --> 00:12:38,170
I just wish I weren't going
to be so busy with work
the next few weeks.
325
00:12:38,171 --> 00:12:39,309
Huh?
326
00:12:39,310 --> 00:12:43,278
Yeah, I'm just
gonna be really busy.
327
00:12:43,279 --> 00:12:46,626
Look, P.J.,
the thing is,
you and I...
328
00:12:46,627 --> 00:12:49,319
Unless you realize
someone's about to release
you first.
329
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:50,423
I don't know.
I just think...
330
00:12:50,424 --> 00:12:53,392
We're not the right
people for each other.
331
00:12:53,393 --> 00:12:55,843
I couldn't
agree more.
332
00:12:55,844 --> 00:12:57,811
That's not what I was
going to say at all.
333
00:12:58,639 --> 00:13:00,468
I was gonna say
334
00:13:00,469 --> 00:13:03,022
I thought we had this
incredible connection
that could surmount anything.
335
00:13:03,023 --> 00:13:04,714
Oh. Well...
336
00:13:06,302 --> 00:13:07,406
That's different.
337
00:13:07,407 --> 00:13:09,546
I thought things
were going so well.
338
00:13:09,547 --> 00:13:10,616
Uh...
339
00:13:11,721 --> 00:13:14,309
Oh, my...
Oh, Keith...
340
00:13:14,310 --> 00:13:15,932
Hey.
341
00:13:15,933 --> 00:13:17,934
Look, you know,
these things can be really
342
00:13:19,039 --> 00:13:20,868
tricky sometimes,
you know?
343
00:13:20,869 --> 00:13:24,423
I mean, you can't
take them personally,
you know? I mean...
344
00:13:24,424 --> 00:13:25,631
I know. I know.
345
00:13:25,632 --> 00:13:27,426
Okay. Okay.
346
00:13:27,427 --> 00:13:29,221
I'll just...
I'll just go
inside then.
347
00:13:29,222 --> 00:13:30,912
Yeah, okay. Yeah.
348
00:13:32,156 --> 00:13:33,191
Um...
349
00:13:36,229 --> 00:13:37,988
Oh, come here.
Yeah.
350
00:13:37,989 --> 00:13:39,370
Yeah.
Yeah.
351
00:13:41,234 --> 00:13:43,062
Yeah.
352
00:13:43,063 --> 00:13:44,099
Um...
353
00:13:45,031 --> 00:13:46,686
Sure.
354
00:13:48,310 --> 00:13:50,345
Yeah.
355
00:13:50,346 --> 00:13:54,419
Oh, God.
What has a girl got to do
to get released around here?
356
00:13:58,941 --> 00:14:00,804
All right,
let me get this straight.
357
00:14:00,805 --> 00:14:03,324
This time,
you were in the middle
of breaking up with him,
358
00:14:03,325 --> 00:14:06,121
and then all of a sudden,
you were making out with him?
359
00:14:06,915 --> 00:14:08,018
Pretty much.
360
00:14:08,019 --> 00:14:10,020
Wow. This guy's working
at a whole other level.
361
00:14:10,021 --> 00:14:11,608
Yeah. Let me
get this down.
362
00:14:11,609 --> 00:14:13,058
What's the first thing
he said to you?
363
00:14:13,059 --> 00:14:15,923
Oh, would you guys stop?
He's not playing me,
all right?
364
00:14:15,924 --> 00:14:17,476
But clearly I could
use some advice.
365
00:14:17,477 --> 00:14:20,824
I mean, what is the best way
to break up with this guy?
366
00:14:20,825 --> 00:14:23,585
I'll tell you the worst way
to break up with someone.
367
00:14:23,586 --> 00:14:27,658
You go out with that
person on and off for, oh,
I don't know, seven years.
368
00:14:27,659 --> 00:14:29,764
You buy the person a ring.
You start planning a wedding.
369
00:14:29,765 --> 00:14:32,353
Then you find out all of
a sudden they're not exactly
who they say they were.
370
00:14:32,354 --> 00:14:34,149
Still not drinking?
371
00:14:34,839 --> 00:14:36,564
Still not drinking.
372
00:14:36,565 --> 00:14:38,497
You could just
ignore his phone calls.
373
00:14:38,498 --> 00:14:40,430
Oh, I can't do that.
374
00:14:40,431 --> 00:14:42,397
You know, I've been
out with him twice.
375
00:14:42,398 --> 00:14:45,435
We went to college
together, you know?
376
00:14:45,436 --> 00:14:47,471
I kind of got to
do it in person.
377
00:14:47,472 --> 00:14:50,233
What, are you crazy?
You can't see this guy again.
You'll sleep with him.
378
00:14:50,234 --> 00:14:51,786
No, I won't.
379
00:14:51,787 --> 00:14:52,891
What? It's true.
380
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,134
I know,
but still. Just...
381
00:14:55,135 --> 00:14:57,826
Face it, P.J.
You're dating
a hypnotist.
382
00:14:57,827 --> 00:15:00,553
You want my advice?
Don't go out with him.
383
00:15:00,554 --> 00:15:03,625
But since you didn't
listen to that, go with,
"It's not you, it's me."
384
00:15:03,626 --> 00:15:05,869
'Cause it's
an oldie but a goodie,
and it works like a charm.
385
00:15:05,870 --> 00:15:07,422
No, no, no.
This guy's a pro.
386
00:15:07,423 --> 00:15:09,390
You're gonna have
to get a lot more
creative than that.
387
00:15:09,391 --> 00:15:12,462
I've always found
insulting someone
to be very effective.
388
00:15:12,463 --> 00:15:15,672
For example, if you tell
someone that their face
is too smushed,
389
00:15:15,673 --> 00:15:18,054
generally they
don't want to hang out
with you anymore.
390
00:15:18,055 --> 00:15:20,263
Have you ever broken up
with anyone before?
391
00:15:20,264 --> 00:15:23,611
No, but I've been involved
in many breakups.
392
00:15:23,612 --> 00:15:25,854
You want to know the best way
to break up with someone?
393
00:15:25,855 --> 00:15:30,825
Marry them, have a kid,
live in a house for 40 years
and eventually die.
394
00:15:30,826 --> 00:15:32,378
Boom. You're free and clear.
395
00:15:32,379 --> 00:15:33,862
Almost happened to me.
396
00:15:33,863 --> 00:15:35,692
Don't worry.
I'm sure it will.
397
00:15:35,693 --> 00:15:38,177
All right, you want
my tried and true method?
398
00:15:38,178 --> 00:15:39,316
Yes.
399
00:15:39,317 --> 00:15:40,593
You turn it
around on them.
400
00:15:40,594 --> 00:15:43,182
You chase after them.
401
00:15:43,183 --> 00:15:46,634
You go from
stalkee to stalker,
and they run like hell.
402
00:15:46,635 --> 00:15:48,256
That's the dumbest thing
I've ever heard.
403
00:15:48,257 --> 00:15:50,224
That would not
work on this guy.
404
00:15:50,225 --> 00:15:51,950
Trust me.
It works on everyone.
405
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,054
Stalking someone?
406
00:15:53,055 --> 00:15:56,230
Are you kidding me?
You know nothing.
407
00:15:56,231 --> 00:15:57,369
Hi, guys.
408
00:15:57,370 --> 00:15:58,473
Hey, Bobby!
409
00:15:58,474 --> 00:16:00,889
Wow, he speaks.
410
00:16:00,890 --> 00:16:03,409
Two words is
a lot for Silent Bob.
411
00:16:03,410 --> 00:16:07,034
Look, Mike,
I got you a job interview.
It's with the Blackhawks.
412
00:16:07,035 --> 00:16:10,451
I know you hate hockey,
but it's the best I could do.
413
00:16:10,452 --> 00:16:12,211
No, man, I don't hate it.
It's just...
414
00:16:12,212 --> 00:16:13,557
I mean, I think it's stupid.
415
00:16:13,558 --> 00:16:15,421
It's soccer on ice
with a stick.
416
00:16:15,422 --> 00:16:18,114
Might not want
to lead with that
in your interview.
417
00:16:18,115 --> 00:16:22,359
Hey, a job interview.
How about that?
418
00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:24,085
Hey, man,
thanks for setting that up.
419
00:16:24,086 --> 00:16:27,330
And I'm sorry
about overreacting.
I was a dick.
420
00:16:27,331 --> 00:16:30,505
I'm sorry I didn't
say anything.
I should have.
421
00:16:30,506 --> 00:16:33,232
You know what?
I should have
said something.
422
00:16:33,233 --> 00:16:35,200
I should have told Wendy
the first time
something happened,
423
00:16:35,201 --> 00:16:36,478
I knew...
424
00:16:42,104 --> 00:16:43,140
Wow.
425
00:16:49,629 --> 00:16:50,732
Hey, guys.
426
00:16:50,733 --> 00:16:52,148
Welcome home.
427
00:16:52,149 --> 00:16:53,391
Brendo!
428
00:17:02,055 --> 00:17:03,573
I'm the luckiest man
in the world.
429
00:17:03,574 --> 00:17:05,713
Why's that?
430
00:17:05,714 --> 00:17:07,301
Because I have you.
431
00:17:07,302 --> 00:17:09,751
Yeah.
432
00:17:09,752 --> 00:17:14,066
Like, about that, Keith.
You're a great guy.
433
00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:18,139
But I don't know
if things are gonna
work out between us.
434
00:17:18,140 --> 00:17:20,141
Well, there's no way to know.
See, that's the beauty
of life.
435
00:17:20,142 --> 00:17:23,248
You just kind of have
to let things happen.
436
00:17:23,249 --> 00:17:26,630
See, I don't know that
there's room in my life
437
00:17:26,631 --> 00:17:30,634
for a relationship right now,
but it is not you, it's me.
438
00:17:30,635 --> 00:17:35,398
P.J., I would never stand
in the way of you exploring
who you are. Never.
439
00:17:35,399 --> 00:17:38,263
Has anyone ever told you
your face is a little mushed?
440
00:17:38,264 --> 00:17:39,402
Excuse me?
441
00:17:39,403 --> 00:17:40,611
Nothing.
442
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:46,133
It's just...
Bottom line.
443
00:17:46,134 --> 00:17:49,550
Whatever it is
you're supposed to feel
for a certain person,
444
00:17:49,551 --> 00:17:53,381
I don't have those
feelings for you, Keith.
445
00:17:53,382 --> 00:17:57,421
And I do think it would
be best that we didn't
see each other anymore.
446
00:17:59,457 --> 00:18:00,596
I see.
447
00:18:04,186 --> 00:18:06,947
Oh, God, Keith.
Don't... Please don't cry.
448
00:18:08,466 --> 00:18:10,122
Keith... Something's
caught in his throat.
449
00:18:10,123 --> 00:18:11,468
When it comes
to being released,
450
00:18:11,469 --> 00:18:13,643
often it just
comes down to pride.
451
00:18:13,644 --> 00:18:17,129
So if you're willing
to forgo yours to preserve
someone else's,
452
00:18:17,130 --> 00:18:18,475
anything's possible.
453
00:18:18,476 --> 00:18:19,994
All right, I can't
do this anymore.
454
00:18:19,995 --> 00:18:25,068
I can't lie to you
or to myself anymore.
455
00:18:25,069 --> 00:18:29,729
The truth is, I'm actually
scared of how real
the connection between us is.
456
00:18:30,557 --> 00:18:31,661
You are?
457
00:18:31,662 --> 00:18:34,320
Yes. I mean,
can't you feel it?
458
00:18:35,010 --> 00:18:36,942
I can.
459
00:18:36,943 --> 00:18:39,738
Ever since I first
laid eyes on you
back at Northwestern.
460
00:18:39,739 --> 00:18:46,193
Your bright orange
suspenders signaling to me
like beacons from your heart.
461
00:18:46,194 --> 00:18:49,955
Keith,
let's elope right now.
462
00:18:49,956 --> 00:18:51,715
I love you.
Come again?
463
00:18:51,716 --> 00:18:53,993
Let's hop into
a car right now
and go to Vegas.
464
00:18:53,994 --> 00:18:55,857
I want to get
married tonight.
465
00:18:55,858 --> 00:18:57,342
All right.
That's a little sudden,
don't you think?
466
00:18:57,343 --> 00:19:00,311
Mrs. Keith Luger.
Mrs. P.J. Luger.
467
00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:06,109
So Mike's method
really works, huh?
468
00:19:06,110 --> 00:19:10,009
Oh, what can I say?
The man is a genius.
469
00:19:10,010 --> 00:19:12,150
Hey, he had his interview
with the Blackhawks today, right?
470
00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:14,428
He did, yeah.
He didn't get it.
471
00:19:14,429 --> 00:19:17,085
I talked to my buddy
already.
472
00:19:17,086 --> 00:19:20,400
Apparently he hadn't heard
that Wayne Gretzky retired.
473
00:19:21,608 --> 00:19:22,746
Oh.
474
00:19:22,747 --> 00:19:24,334
So I should
tell him, right?
475
00:19:24,335 --> 00:19:26,129
Of course.
Are you kidding me?
476
00:19:26,130 --> 00:19:27,579
Yeah. I think we all
learned that lesson.
477
00:19:27,580 --> 00:19:29,443
Okay. Just making sure.
478
00:19:29,444 --> 00:19:30,962
Okay, Franklin.
479
00:19:31,722 --> 00:19:33,205
I call.
480
00:19:33,206 --> 00:19:34,897
Queens and fours.
481
00:19:35,829 --> 00:19:37,072
I got a straight.
482
00:19:38,625 --> 00:19:39,832
You only had four cards.
483
00:19:39,833 --> 00:19:42,007
What?
484
00:19:42,008 --> 00:19:44,009
How about another
beer for Brendan?
485
00:19:45,287 --> 00:19:47,702
I am back
in the saddle again.
486
00:19:47,703 --> 00:19:50,636
Feast your eyes on
the next assistant
public relations director
487
00:19:50,637 --> 00:19:54,122
for the Chicago Blackhawks.
I was on fire!
488
00:19:54,123 --> 00:19:56,401
Thinking about signing
Gretzky as my first deal.
489
00:19:56,402 --> 00:19:58,989
It was amazing, man.
I got in there.
490
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:01,509
He asked, I answered.
He thrusted, I parried.
491
00:20:01,510 --> 00:20:03,373
You didn't get it.
492
00:20:03,374 --> 00:20:07,343
You didn't get the job.
I talked to my friend already.
You did not get it.
493
00:20:07,344 --> 00:20:10,311
What the hell, man.
You can't let me enjoy
myself for just one night?
494
00:20:10,312 --> 00:20:12,486
You said
if I heard anything.
495
00:20:12,487 --> 00:20:14,695
I know what I said,
but you seem to just relish
496
00:20:14,696 --> 00:20:16,490
taking the wind
out of my sails.
497
00:20:16,491 --> 00:20:17,801
No, I don't!
498
00:20:17,802 --> 00:20:19,389
Oh, I definitely
sense some relish.
499
00:20:19,390 --> 00:20:21,943
It's funny.
Once you recognize
this whole pride thing,
500
00:20:21,944 --> 00:20:23,462
it all becomes
really clear.
501
00:20:23,463 --> 00:20:25,602
Just a second!
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
502
00:20:25,603 --> 00:20:27,570
Dude, you are lucky
you didn't get that job.
503
00:20:27,571 --> 00:20:29,951
You're completely
overqualified for it.
504
00:20:29,952 --> 00:20:31,298
You know
who I spoke to today?
505
00:20:31,299 --> 00:20:32,989
The guy who
works at the Bears.
506
00:20:32,990 --> 00:20:35,094
He says they're gonna
be looking for somebody
in about a month.
507
00:20:35,095 --> 00:20:36,406
Seriously?
Yeah.
508
00:20:36,407 --> 00:20:38,374
Come on.
Take a seat.
509
00:20:38,375 --> 00:20:40,997
That would
be amazing.
510
00:20:40,998 --> 00:20:43,033
Thank you so much
for doing that, man.
511
00:20:43,034 --> 00:20:44,621
No worries.
512
00:20:44,622 --> 00:20:47,175
And, hey, you know what?
I'm sorry.
513
00:20:47,176 --> 00:20:48,349
I can't help it.
I'm a dick.
514
00:20:48,350 --> 00:20:49,626
Don't worry
about it, buddy.
515
00:20:49,627 --> 00:20:51,421
You're a good friend.
You're a good friend, too.
516
00:20:51,422 --> 00:20:53,389
You're a really good friend.
You're a really...
517
00:20:53,390 --> 00:20:54,769
All right, before you
two start making out,
518
00:20:54,770 --> 00:20:56,737
can we please get
back to the game?
519
00:20:56,738 --> 00:20:59,222
This has been my
favorite episode
of Gilmore Girls.
520
00:20:59,223 --> 00:21:00,603
All right!
521
00:21:00,604 --> 00:21:02,087
You guys were
mad at each other,
522
00:21:02,088 --> 00:21:04,089
and then you
got back together.
523
00:21:04,090 --> 00:21:06,609
Oh, the mom on
that show's so hot.
And the daughter...
524
00:21:06,610 --> 00:21:09,957
So in the end,
while it sucks
to get released,
525
00:21:09,958 --> 00:21:12,580
ultimately,
there's acceptance.
526
00:21:12,581 --> 00:21:15,307
And if you're really lucky,
you've got friends around
527
00:21:15,308 --> 00:21:16,929
to help you
pick up the pieces.
528
00:21:16,930 --> 00:21:19,691
You know, I might be an ass,
but I'm a sensitive man.
529
00:21:19,692 --> 00:21:21,313
See? That's why
I was right
530
00:21:21,314 --> 00:21:23,039
not to tell him
about getting fired
in the first place.
531
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:25,213
Who knows what he would
have done if we'd been
the ones to tell him.
532
00:21:25,214 --> 00:21:26,939
That's right.
533
00:21:26,940 --> 00:21:29,148
Wait a minute.
You knew?
534
00:21:29,149 --> 00:21:31,428
Oh, you are in
so much trouble.
535
00:21:33,602 --> 00:21:34,983
Nice slide.
40192
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