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1
00:00:03,637 --> 00:00:06,240
Crutch is filmed in front
of a live studio audience.
2
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,276
Jake! We're out of dryer sheets.
3
00:00:08,376 --> 00:00:09,927
I know you're putting
three in there.
4
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:12,546
That's way too much freshness.
5
00:00:13,447 --> 00:00:14,632
Jake!
6
00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:15,683
-Jake!
-Oh.
7
00:00:15,783 --> 00:00:17,135
Oh, my bad. My bad, Dad.
8
00:00:17,218 --> 00:00:18,769
I'm front row
at the Travis Scott concert.
9
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:21,889
How you gonna be at a concert
you in my living room?
10
00:00:21,989 --> 00:00:23,557
Well, it's virtual reality.
11
00:00:23,657 --> 00:00:25,726
That is not a concert.
That's laziness.
12
00:00:25,826 --> 00:00:27,695
The fun of going to a concert is
13
00:00:27,795 --> 00:00:30,264
all the stuff you got to
go through just to get there.
14
00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:34,119
Do you mind telling me
how my generation sucks later?
15
00:00:34,202 --> 00:00:35,969
He's about to do
"Butterfly Effect."
16
00:00:37,271 --> 00:00:39,707
Dad, I was thinking about, uh...
17
00:00:39,807 --> 00:00:41,126
About what, dryer sheets?
18
00:00:41,209 --> 00:00:44,078
'Cause you kids are running
right through 'em.
19
00:00:44,212 --> 00:00:46,631
No, I was thinking
about the business.
20
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,149
Okay.
21
00:00:48,249 --> 00:00:49,417
What you got?
22
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,585
Well, I was hoping
for a better title.
23
00:00:51,685 --> 00:00:54,088
That's not about the business.
That's about you.
24
00:00:54,188 --> 00:00:55,840
Well, I just feel like
25
00:00:55,923 --> 00:00:58,809
"social media manager" is
a little narrow, you know.
26
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,345
And-and it's a clunky acronym.
27
00:01:00,428 --> 00:01:03,397
You know, "SMM" just doesn't
flow off the tongue.
28
00:01:03,497 --> 00:01:04,932
How about "J-O-B"?
29
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,600
How does that flow?
30
00:01:07,835 --> 00:01:09,237
What is it with you kids?
31
00:01:09,370 --> 00:01:10,988
He wants to be at
pretend concerts,
32
00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,606
and you want a pretend title.
33
00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:14,408
I don't want a pretend title.
34
00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:15,876
I want it to mean something.
35
00:01:15,976 --> 00:01:18,363
Well, if you want a title, baby,
you got to earn it.
36
00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:19,713
Okay.
37
00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:21,115
Okay. Yeah.
38
00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:22,975
Let's, uh... let's circle back
to that later.
39
00:01:24,185 --> 00:01:26,454
Dad, Dad, you really
got to try this.
40
00:01:26,554 --> 00:01:27,821
That was so intense.
41
00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:29,223
I'm not putting that on my head.
42
00:01:29,323 --> 00:01:32,126
Fine, suit yourself.
I got to go shower.
43
00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:35,729
Excuse me.
44
00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:39,133
What you talking about
put this on my head?
45
00:01:40,334 --> 00:01:43,371
He must be out of
his rabbit-ass mind.
46
00:01:43,471 --> 00:01:44,938
Kids today.
47
00:01:45,072 --> 00:01:46,507
Okay.
48
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,442
Oh, damn.
49
00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:51,145
Jake! Where's the concert?
50
00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:52,946
Oh, man, here we go.
51
00:01:53,045 --> 00:01:55,616
Oh, uh-oh.
I'm on a snowy mountain.
52
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:59,387
Black man on a snowy mountain.
We in trouble.
53
00:01:59,487 --> 00:02:01,655
Oh, I'm skiing now. Here we go.
54
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,665
Yeah!
55
00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:14,368
Who says Black men can't ski?
56
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,471
♪ Tells it like it is ♪
57
00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:19,507
♪ Crutch is here ♪
58
00:02:19,607 --> 00:02:21,975
-♪ For friends, family, kids ♪
-CRUTCH: Yo, it's Francois!
59
00:02:22,109 --> 00:02:24,378
-♪ Crutch is Crutchfield ♪
-♪ Crutch. ♪
60
00:02:28,949 --> 00:02:30,818
Check it out.
Chess is like life.
61
00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:32,403
It teaches you strategy,
62
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:35,723
and it teaches you how to get
into your opponent's head.
63
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:38,459
Chess is not like life at all.
64
00:02:38,559 --> 00:02:41,161
That's why you suck at it, Jake.
65
00:02:42,129 --> 00:02:44,232
No, seriously.
66
00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:45,750
In chess, everyone starts off
67
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:48,168
with the same pieces
on a level playing field,
68
00:02:48,302 --> 00:02:50,838
and that is not like life.
69
00:02:50,938 --> 00:02:52,406
Not like life?
70
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:53,674
Nope.
71
00:02:53,774 --> 00:02:55,343
Then how come
the white pieces go first?
72
00:02:55,442 --> 00:02:58,546
That's 'cause chess is
more like America.
73
00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:00,881
I'll get it.
74
00:03:00,981 --> 00:03:02,550
Don't listen to your uncle.
75
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:05,219
You just remember
to protect your king.
76
00:03:05,353 --> 00:03:07,855
Sounds like a patriarchy to me.
77
00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:09,823
Can I help you?
78
00:03:09,923 --> 00:03:11,525
What's going on, man?
79
00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:13,861
-It's Teddy Grams.
-Oh.
80
00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:15,613
We spoke on the phone
about a legal situation.
81
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:17,030
Right, right, but, uh, I thought
82
00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:18,966
we were going to meet later
at my office.
83
00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:20,534
Ah, something came up.
84
00:03:20,634 --> 00:03:21,769
Okay.
85
00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:23,504
How you know where I live?
86
00:03:24,305 --> 00:03:26,374
You're not a hard guy to find.
87
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:30,043
Okay. How can I help you?
88
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:33,113
I got a lot of revenue streams
that need protecting.
89
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,748
I can do that. Sure.
90
00:03:34,848 --> 00:03:36,216
Uh, what type
of revenue, though?
91
00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:38,335
Property?
Incorporating a business?
92
00:03:38,418 --> 00:03:40,688
Ah, something like that.
93
00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:45,125
Look, bro, I'm-a go ahead
and put you on retainer.
94
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:46,527
Yes, sir.
95
00:03:46,627 --> 00:03:49,228
Well, I didn't agree
to take you on as a client.
96
00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:51,816
-Mm-hmm.
-Um...
97
00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:54,067
I can't accept this.
98
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:55,303
Accept what?
99
00:03:55,403 --> 00:03:58,305
This is a bag full of money.
100
00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:00,341
What money?
101
00:04:01,475 --> 00:04:04,177
You a wild boy.
102
00:04:06,414 --> 00:04:07,915
Checkmate.
103
00:04:08,015 --> 00:04:10,584
Down goes the patriarchy.
104
00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:14,121
I must be a really good teacher.
105
00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:17,208
Like you said,
chess is about strategy.
106
00:04:17,291 --> 00:04:21,295
My strategy was to not tell you
I'm in Chess Club.
107
00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:24,515
But that's lying.
108
00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:27,401
Now I'm in my opponent's head.
109
00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:30,137
Wait! Get out of my head!
110
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:33,441
♪ ♪
111
00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:36,026
Do you know
who Teddy Grams' peoples are?
112
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,111
His uncle is Caleb Washington.
113
00:04:38,211 --> 00:04:40,481
-Oh, that is not good.
-Wait, uh,
114
00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:42,182
-who are y'all talking about?
-Yeah.
115
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,784
Caleb Washington.
116
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:45,870
He was the meanest kid
in Harlem.
117
00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,872
He once set a fire truck on fire
118
00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:51,525
just to see if a fire truck
would come put the fire out.
119
00:04:52,926 --> 00:04:55,663
He was so confident,
when he robbed bodegas,
120
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,965
he would feed the cat
on the way out.
121
00:04:59,099 --> 00:05:01,218
Jake, what are you doing
bringing this man's nephew
122
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,437
into our house,
where my kids live?
123
00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:04,638
I didn't bring him.
124
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,073
He just showed up.
125
00:05:06,173 --> 00:05:07,541
With a stack of cash?
126
00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:09,093
We all know what that means.
127
00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:11,945
Any legitimate client
would not be carrying around
128
00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:14,682
a stack of cash in a paper bag.
129
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:15,983
I know that, Auntie.
130
00:05:16,082 --> 00:05:17,451
That's why I went
to law school...
131
00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:19,119
to handle situations like this.
132
00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:22,356
Let me tell you something,
homey pastromey.
133
00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:26,760
This is real life.
134
00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:28,161
You might know the law,
135
00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:30,831
but you do not know
the law of the jungle.
136
00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:33,233
You is not Mufasa.
137
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:37,571
I grew up in Harlem, too, Dad.
138
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:40,240
Yeah, but you was in
Pokey-man Club.
139
00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:43,844
First of all, it's Pokémon.
140
00:05:43,977 --> 00:05:45,979
Secondly, it's Anime Club.
141
00:05:46,079 --> 00:05:49,282
And have you ever seen
One Piece? It's gangsta.
142
00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:52,586
Yeah, you're proving
his point, nephew.
143
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,321
You get involved like this,
144
00:05:54,422 --> 00:05:56,056
it just keeps going
deeper and deeper.
145
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,558
But we don't even know
146
00:05:57,658 --> 00:05:59,243
if this has anything to do
with Caleb, though.
147
00:05:59,326 --> 00:06:01,595
Well, if Caleb's nephew
got money back on the streets,
148
00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:03,113
Caleb know about it.
149
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,566
So, where is this
Caleb Washington?
150
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:08,035
He's doing 25 to life
in Gardnersville.
151
00:06:08,135 --> 00:06:10,037
I do shifts up there sometimes.
152
00:06:10,137 --> 00:06:12,372
You know what?
I'm gonna give Teddy a call,
153
00:06:12,473 --> 00:06:15,208
give him his money back,
and this will all go away.
154
00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:18,178
No. 'Cause if he's working
for his uncle,
155
00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:21,014
you got to go to the top
of the food chain,
156
00:06:21,114 --> 00:06:22,716
and the top is Caleb.
157
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,251
Okay, then I'll make
an appointment
158
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:25,953
at Gardnersville to see Caleb.
159
00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,888
Yeah, well,
then I'm going with you.
160
00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:29,474
I-I can't bring you, Dad.
161
00:06:29,557 --> 00:06:30,641
You're a civilian.
162
00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:32,593
Well, tell them I'm your father.
163
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:33,927
They're going to say,
164
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:36,530
"Tell your father
to wait in the car."
165
00:06:36,630 --> 00:06:38,649
Jake is right... the only person
166
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:40,985
who can go inside with him
is his paralegal.
167
00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,603
I'm your paralegal.
168
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,507
You are not going
to let this go, are you?
169
00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:47,492
No.
170
00:06:47,575 --> 00:06:49,142
'Cause if you can't handle me,
171
00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:53,163
I know you can't deal with
an old-school guy like Caleb.
172
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:54,815
Dad,
173
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:57,751
I talk to incarcerated people
all the time.
174
00:06:57,851 --> 00:06:59,520
It is a part of my job.
175
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:01,506
Yeah, but you've never talked
to Caleb.
176
00:07:01,589 --> 00:07:04,792
Plus, I'm not gonna shut up
until you agree to take me.
177
00:07:07,695 --> 00:07:09,129
Ah, fine.
178
00:07:09,229 --> 00:07:11,264
Fine, you can be my paralegal.
179
00:07:11,364 --> 00:07:12,633
Are you happy?
180
00:07:13,801 --> 00:07:16,103
Grab me a cup of coffee, Frank.
181
00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:18,672
No.
182
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,024
I'm off the clock right now.
183
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:21,809
I don't start till tomorrow.
184
00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:24,978
Plus, my legs are beat up
from skiing.
185
00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:28,281
I took gold.
186
00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:31,985
♪ ♪
187
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:37,057
Good morning, Flaco.
188
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:39,376
Good morning.
189
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,294
Look who's all dressed up.
190
00:07:41,428 --> 00:07:42,996
Not necessary.
191
00:07:43,997 --> 00:07:47,568
Well, I believe you've got to
dress for the title you want.
192
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:51,204
Oh, I get it... you're doing
that manifesting thing again.
193
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,040
Yeah, good luck with that.
194
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:55,876
What's with the box?
195
00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:59,312
Oh, I just thought I'd add some
of my personality to the office.
196
00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:03,734
And, um, some calming oils
to lift the mood.
197
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,553
Freshen the air.
198
00:08:05,653 --> 00:08:07,154
It'll make the store
more inviting.
199
00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:08,355
Yeah.
200
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:11,358
Calming oils really agitate me.
201
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:13,911
Well, you know, I was thinking.
202
00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:17,197
Why don't we, like,
expand our clientele?
203
00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:20,433
You know, after my success
with the rugs, I...
204
00:08:20,534 --> 00:08:21,769
You mean our success?
205
00:08:21,869 --> 00:08:23,136
Well, yes, of course.
206
00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:25,773
Um, I mean,
I already have my first...
207
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:31,178
Our first appointment coming in.
208
00:08:31,278 --> 00:08:33,358
They found us through
our new company Instagram page.
209
00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:36,216
Look, I know
I make it look easy,
210
00:08:36,316 --> 00:08:38,451
but it's
a very complicated business.
211
00:08:38,552 --> 00:08:41,889
Oh, well, sales are just sales,
Flaco.
212
00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:44,324
I thought you were trying
to get the bag.
213
00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:47,527
-We're here.
-Yo.
214
00:08:47,628 --> 00:08:49,730
-Are you "Ja-my-lah"?
-It's "Ja-mill-ah."
215
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,665
Oh, hey, Jamilah.
216
00:08:51,765 --> 00:08:53,117
-How are you?
-Good.
217
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:55,603
And you must be Aiden,
and you must be Madison.
218
00:08:55,703 --> 00:08:57,154
-Yes.
-You can just call us Aidison.
219
00:08:57,237 --> 00:08:58,205
Oh.
220
00:08:58,305 --> 00:09:00,340
Oh, I get it.
221
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:02,042
"Aidison."
222
00:09:02,142 --> 00:09:03,577
Yes.
223
00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:06,246
Why don't we all just
take a seat
224
00:09:06,346 --> 00:09:07,514
-at the table...
-Thank you.
225
00:09:07,615 --> 00:09:09,783
...and we can see
what you're looking for.
226
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,720
Hey, folks, are you guys
looking for throw rugs?
227
00:09:12,853 --> 00:09:14,221
Oh. Throw rugs.
228
00:09:14,321 --> 00:09:16,256
Um, those gross me out.
229
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:19,259
They're like zoos for germs.
230
00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:22,596
Well, here's the zookeeper,
Jamilah.
231
00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:24,598
She does throw rugs.
232
00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:29,136
I'm the expert
on hardwood and tiles.
233
00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:32,139
Oh, well, then you're the one
that we want to talk to.
234
00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:34,474
I'm the one
they want to talk to.
235
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:37,978
♪
236
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:41,849
I really don't get it.
237
00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:44,017
I don't understand
why they took my belt
238
00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:46,286
and let you keep yours.
239
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:47,855
'Cause I'm an attorney
240
00:09:47,955 --> 00:09:49,840
and I have a different
security clearance than you.
241
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:53,560
Yeah, well, paralegals
need to unionize.
242
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:59,366
You know, I worked my whole life
243
00:09:59,466 --> 00:10:01,935
for me and you
to avoid places like this.
244
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:05,438
Now look, we're locked up
all because of you.
245
00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:07,607
This next part
is called a mantrap.
246
00:10:07,708 --> 00:10:09,293
It's kind of like
entering a jewelry store
247
00:10:09,376 --> 00:10:11,478
but they take
all your valuables.
248
00:10:11,578 --> 00:10:13,346
Oh, that's not that bad.
249
00:10:14,815 --> 00:10:16,449
Yo! Yo!
250
00:10:16,549 --> 00:10:17,818
Get me out of here!
251
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,420
Hey, hey, you need
to calm down, Frank.
252
00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:21,655
Sorry, guys.
253
00:10:21,755 --> 00:10:23,590
It's his first time
in a mantrap.
254
00:10:23,691 --> 00:10:25,759
More crowded than
the A Train up here.
255
00:10:25,859 --> 00:10:27,560
Get your hand out of my pocket!
256
00:10:31,331 --> 00:10:33,466
Jake, good to see you again.
Welcome back.
257
00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:36,036
Hello, Clarice.
258
00:10:38,005 --> 00:10:39,807
Is this your paralegal?
259
00:10:39,907 --> 00:10:41,425
This is Frank.
260
00:10:41,508 --> 00:10:44,144
He a little wet behind the ears,
but he'll get the hang of it.
261
00:10:44,244 --> 00:10:46,747
He looks incompetent to me.
262
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:51,251
Shoot, I thought
you was an inmate.
263
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:55,823
Listen, I'm stationed
right there
264
00:10:55,923 --> 00:10:57,624
outside the glass,
and I can communicate
265
00:10:57,725 --> 00:10:58,992
with you through the intercom.
266
00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:00,527
You cannot touch him.
267
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,579
He cannot touch you.
268
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,632
And don't make any sudden moves.
269
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,208
Hello.
I'm attorney Jake Crutch...
270
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:16,977
You ain't my lawyer.
271
00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:18,879
What, you with the DA?
272
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:21,014
FBI? Literary agent?
273
00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:24,351
'Cause, uh, got my manuscript
back in my cell if you...
274
00:11:25,218 --> 00:11:26,353
No, actually.
275
00:11:26,453 --> 00:11:30,223
No, uh, we have
a few questions for you.
276
00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:33,526
I don't know you, and I don't
care about your questions,
277
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:35,963
and I ain't talking
to some kid lawyer.
278
00:11:36,063 --> 00:11:39,466
You're sure saying a lot
for a guy who ain't talking.
279
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:42,535
You look real familiar to me.
280
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:43,971
Where I know you from, huh?
281
00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:47,140
This is, uh, my paralegal,
Frankie.
282
00:11:47,908 --> 00:11:49,877
You look kind of old
to be a paralegal.
283
00:11:49,977 --> 00:11:52,412
Career transition, you know?
284
00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:55,883
Never too late for you
to follow your dreams.
285
00:11:56,784 --> 00:11:59,887
Why are y'all wasting my time?
286
00:12:00,020 --> 00:12:03,223
What? You got a hot date?
287
00:12:05,092 --> 00:12:08,628
Sit your ass down, inmate.
288
00:12:10,764 --> 00:12:14,902
I knew I recognized
that smart mouth from somewhere,
289
00:12:15,002 --> 00:12:17,337
Francois Crutchfield.
290
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,407
Jake, the jig is up.
291
00:12:20,507 --> 00:12:22,409
What's up, Caleb?
292
00:12:23,643 --> 00:12:24,995
Been a minute.
293
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,480
Wait, wait, wait.
294
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:28,700
You-you two know each other?
295
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,952
What's that siren mean?
296
00:12:32,052 --> 00:12:35,122
It don't mean lunch,
that's for sure.
297
00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:37,024
Son, we gotta get out of here.
298
00:12:37,124 --> 00:12:38,091
Son?
299
00:12:38,191 --> 00:12:40,227
We having
a small prison emergency.
300
00:12:40,327 --> 00:12:42,930
You guys'll be safe in here.
The door will be locked.
301
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:51,604
Well, look like I do got
a hot date after all, huh?
302
00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:57,744
♪ ♪
303
00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,212
Hmm, interesting.
304
00:12:59,312 --> 00:13:01,281
So, you're saying
none of these options could work
305
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:02,666
for postmodern minimalism
306
00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:05,052
or Renaissance meets revolution?
307
00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:07,620
Don't point at me when you say
Renaissance meets revolution.
308
00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:09,289
I'm the postmodern minimalist.
309
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:10,423
Come on.
310
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:12,292
Okay, why does everything
311
00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:13,927
have to be white and plain?
312
00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,996
I'm searching for a vibe.
313
00:13:16,096 --> 00:13:19,166
Yes, you said that 12 times.
314
00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:20,934
Now 13.
315
00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:22,853
Whoa. This...
316
00:13:22,936 --> 00:13:24,972
this energy
is not very productive.
317
00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:27,274
Well, maybe there's a way
to combine both styles.
318
00:13:28,876 --> 00:13:30,410
Excuse me, Flaco.
319
00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:32,112
Allow me to bail you out.
320
00:13:32,212 --> 00:13:33,397
What if we combine
321
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,448
this white base molding
322
00:13:35,582 --> 00:13:37,201
with this marble flooring?
323
00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:40,587
Oh, now, this
is an interesting vibe. Okay.
324
00:13:40,687 --> 00:13:43,190
-I love the sapphire veins.
-Oh, yeah.
325
00:13:43,290 --> 00:13:46,543
Score one for
"throw rug girl." Ow.
326
00:13:46,626 --> 00:13:48,261
I have sapphire shooting
through my veins
327
00:13:48,361 --> 00:13:49,997
right now.
328
00:13:50,097 --> 00:13:52,082
Can you tell me
where the marble was sourced?
329
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:53,266
Um, well...
330
00:13:53,366 --> 00:13:54,968
...let me see.
331
00:13:55,068 --> 00:13:56,220
Uh, I would like
to get that for you.
332
00:13:56,303 --> 00:13:57,737
I just need to, uh...
333
00:13:57,837 --> 00:14:00,257
Learn the difference between
marble and quartzite.
334
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:02,375
Stick to rugs.
335
00:14:04,311 --> 00:14:06,513
This is quartzite.
It's very durable,
336
00:14:06,613 --> 00:14:09,816
and this type
is manufactured, not sourced.
337
00:14:09,917 --> 00:14:11,068
Ooh, I love that.
338
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:12,585
That'll reduce
our carbon footprint.
339
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,854
Manufactured quartzite?
340
00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:17,157
I don't even know
who you are anymore.
341
00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:19,826
These two, am I right?
342
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,111
If you would have
let me handle it,
343
00:14:21,194 --> 00:14:22,729
I would've had this in the bag.
344
00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:24,331
What are you talking about?
345
00:14:24,431 --> 00:14:26,483
You couldn't answer any of
their most basic questions
346
00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:27,867
about these materials.
347
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:30,203
Well, at least I read
a recent style magazine.
348
00:14:30,337 --> 00:14:32,705
You couldn't find their vibe
in the middle of Coachella.
349
00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:35,842
This energy is not productive.
350
00:14:36,776 --> 00:14:39,179
♪ ♪
351
00:14:41,281 --> 00:14:42,549
Dad, how do you know Caleb?
352
00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:44,717
Yeah, Dad,
353
00:14:44,851 --> 00:14:46,586
tell him how you know me.
354
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,189
We grew up
in the same neighborhood
355
00:14:49,289 --> 00:14:51,358
at the same time,
had the same paper route.
356
00:14:51,491 --> 00:14:54,311
Same paper route, huh?
357
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,981
Nah, it's a little bit
more than that.
358
00:14:57,064 --> 00:14:59,099
What's he talking about?
359
00:14:59,199 --> 00:15:02,035
Back then, the neighborhood
was a lot smaller.
360
00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:03,736
Everybody knew each other.
361
00:15:03,870 --> 00:15:05,605
Put it to you like this:
362
00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:08,875
We had a guard on
the inside of the bank on 147th.
363
00:15:08,976 --> 00:15:11,711
We was gonna hit
all the safety deposit boxes.
364
00:15:11,811 --> 00:15:13,630
Job went perfect,
365
00:15:13,713 --> 00:15:16,049
but our ride didn't show up.
366
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:18,085
Do you know how hard it is
367
00:15:18,185 --> 00:15:20,971
to lug 80 pounds
of cash and jewelry
368
00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:23,256
on the A train?
369
00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:26,259
Why didn't you take a cab?
370
00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:29,096
I think about that every day.
371
00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:31,764
And after you beat that case,
372
00:15:31,864 --> 00:15:33,233
you didn't learn your lesson.
373
00:15:33,333 --> 00:15:36,303
You turned around
and ran a big drug empire.
374
00:15:36,403 --> 00:15:39,239
I think about that
every day, too.
375
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,326
How am I just
finding out about this?
376
00:15:42,409 --> 00:15:43,810
'Cause it was
before you was born.
377
00:15:43,910 --> 00:15:45,262
I can't believe you were
part of a bank robbery.
378
00:15:45,345 --> 00:15:47,780
No, no, no, he wasn't.
379
00:15:47,914 --> 00:15:50,250
He was supposed to be,
380
00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:52,352
and his ass didn't show up.
381
00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:53,620
I was a kid,
382
00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:55,122
just got my learner's permit
383
00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:58,725
and I wasn't allowed
to drive without an adult.
384
00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:01,694
Nah, man.
385
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,430
You ain't show up
'cause you soft.
386
00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:06,633
Soft?
387
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:08,468
Okay.
388
00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:10,370
Well, you know something,
389
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,722
I looked at your file,
Caleb Washington.
390
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,058
And, uh,
391
00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:15,875
it says here you helped
392
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:17,777
20 inmates get their GED.
393
00:16:17,910 --> 00:16:20,480
-Yeah, they struggle with vowels.
-Yeah, and
394
00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:21,932
you lead Bible study
on Wednesdays.
395
00:16:22,015 --> 00:16:24,034
I'm one of God's vessels.
396
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:26,453
And you bake for the guards?
397
00:16:26,553 --> 00:16:28,205
Uh, all that's in my file?
398
00:16:28,288 --> 00:16:30,090
Yes, you got blueberry muffins
399
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,958
on your permanent record.
400
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,495
So, you see something,
401
00:16:35,595 --> 00:16:38,098
joining gangs
and committing crimes is easy,
402
00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:39,883
but you know what's hard?
403
00:16:39,966 --> 00:16:42,402
Raising two kids in Harlem,
404
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,304
looking out for your community,
405
00:16:44,404 --> 00:16:46,673
and running
your own legit business.
406
00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:49,709
There's nothing soft about that.
407
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:52,712
Kid got some stones, Crutch.
408
00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:55,348
But look, your nephew Teddy
409
00:16:55,448 --> 00:16:58,851
dropped off a bag of cash
to try to get me on retainer.
410
00:16:58,951 --> 00:17:00,187
That's why you here?
411
00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:02,689
Mm-hmm.
I'm not that type of lawyer,
412
00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:05,023
so you got to tell him
to take it back.
413
00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:08,895
Well, I don't put cash on
the street like that no more.
414
00:17:08,994 --> 00:17:10,347
And I don't know
what Teddy's into.
415
00:17:10,430 --> 00:17:12,531
I thought he was straight,
but if you saying
416
00:17:12,632 --> 00:17:14,767
he got cash
on the street, then...
417
00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:16,703
I don't know.
418
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,939
You don't kn...
419
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,441
Wait.
420
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:24,711
So, you're not
the top of the food chain?
421
00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:27,764
And I could have just
talked to Teddy
422
00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:29,549
like I wanted to
in the first place?
423
00:17:30,317 --> 00:17:33,019
That's what I would have did.
424
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:35,122
Uh-uh. Uh.
425
00:17:35,222 --> 00:17:38,458
Your blueberry muffin ass
ain't gonna do nothing.
426
00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:39,726
'Cause you locked up.
427
00:17:39,859 --> 00:17:41,928
I'm gonna do something
you can't do.
428
00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:44,564
I'm-a go home.
429
00:17:50,837 --> 00:17:52,805
That'd have been fly
if the door wasn't locked.
430
00:17:54,307 --> 00:17:56,743
♪ ♪
431
00:17:56,876 --> 00:17:58,978
Take a look at
this Brazilian mahogany.
432
00:17:59,078 --> 00:18:01,914
Oh, yeah, let's just
destroy the rainforest. Great.
433
00:18:02,715 --> 00:18:05,418
What about vinyl, huh?
Easy to clean,
434
00:18:05,518 --> 00:18:06,553
never goes out of style.
435
00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:08,338
Well, it's never in style.
436
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:10,223
Sorry, I do not do vinyl.
437
00:18:10,323 --> 00:18:11,791
Well, you sure have
a lot of records
438
00:18:11,891 --> 00:18:13,110
for someone
who doesn't do vinyl.
439
00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:14,093
This is not working.
440
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:15,428
Of course it isn't working.
441
00:18:15,528 --> 00:18:16,680
You won't let me do my job.
442
00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:18,731
-You're right.
-I am?
443
00:18:18,831 --> 00:18:20,833
Flaco, we need to be allies.
444
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:23,570
No, I think it's better
we just team up.
445
00:18:25,004 --> 00:18:26,939
♪ ♪
446
00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:28,675
Is that order ready yet, Flaco?
447
00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:30,910
-They're on their way to pick it up.
-Sure thing.
448
00:18:31,010 --> 00:18:32,279
Hey, what's on the cart?
449
00:18:32,379 --> 00:18:33,530
Oh, that's for another customer.
450
00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:34,881
They're having their house
451
00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:37,016
remodeled for
Architectural Digest.
452
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,486
Architectural Digest,
453
00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:41,588
the holy grail
of hipster aesthetic?
454
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:42,706
I want to see.
455
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:43,956
With these big customers,
456
00:18:44,056 --> 00:18:45,858
we sign privacy agreements.
457
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,960
But maybe you can
give them a little peek?
458
00:18:48,094 --> 00:18:49,213
Mmm.
459
00:18:49,296 --> 00:18:50,863
30 years in the business,
460
00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,799
I've never given anyone a peek.
461
00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:56,102
Well, come on, Flac Flac.
It's "Aidison."
462
00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:59,972
Yeah. Come on... Flac Flac.
463
00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:03,576
All right,
but this did not happen.
464
00:19:07,447 --> 00:19:10,049
The style of this job
is Harlem Authentic.
465
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,702
Um, yeah.
We want Harlem Authentic.
466
00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:16,022
Yeah, there's nothing more
authentically Harlem than us.
467
00:19:17,257 --> 00:19:19,992
How much is the other
customer paying for it?
468
00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:22,028
'Cause we could pay double.
469
00:19:22,128 --> 00:19:24,214
I just have to call my dad.
470
00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:25,798
Well, you do that,
471
00:19:25,898 --> 00:19:27,551
and we'll give you five minutes
to give us an offer.
472
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:29,336
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
473
00:19:29,436 --> 00:19:31,588
Good job, partner.
474
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,706
There's a lot of gold
in these weirdos.
475
00:19:33,806 --> 00:19:35,559
You know, Flaco,
I finally figured out
476
00:19:35,642 --> 00:19:37,277
what I think my title should be.
477
00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:40,063
-Partners?
-Aw, that's very sweet, Flaco.
478
00:19:40,146 --> 00:19:43,283
But what I was gonna actually
say was "Queen of Vibes."
479
00:19:43,383 --> 00:19:45,485
I like that.
480
00:19:45,585 --> 00:19:47,737
The notorious Q.O.V.
481
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:49,406
Uh...
482
00:19:49,489 --> 00:19:51,291
♪ ♪
483
00:19:52,058 --> 00:19:54,694
All right, listen,
when Teddy gets in here,
484
00:19:54,827 --> 00:19:56,563
do not say anything.
485
00:19:56,663 --> 00:19:58,164
Let me handle this.
486
00:19:58,265 --> 00:19:59,966
-It's all on you, son.
-All right.
487
00:20:00,066 --> 00:20:01,701
But as your paralegal,
488
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:04,837
I'm in charge of your backup.
489
00:20:04,937 --> 00:20:06,339
And you ain't gonna hear
490
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:07,574
nothing from me.
491
00:20:07,674 --> 00:20:10,209
I let my taser
do all the talking.
492
00:20:10,343 --> 00:20:12,379
We should stretch
before the event begins.
493
00:20:12,512 --> 00:20:14,747
Ow.
494
00:20:17,149 --> 00:20:18,318
-Teddy...
-What?
495
00:20:18,418 --> 00:20:20,270
-We need to talk.
-Yeah, yeah, we do.
496
00:20:20,353 --> 00:20:21,921
There's been a misunderstanding.
497
00:20:22,021 --> 00:20:23,055
There sure has.
498
00:20:23,189 --> 00:20:24,857
My uncle Caleb called my house
499
00:20:24,957 --> 00:20:27,427
and told my momma that
you visited him in prison.
500
00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:31,197
She came to my room and
yelled at me for five minutes.
501
00:20:32,299 --> 00:20:34,100
Yeah, I still
stay with my momma.
502
00:20:35,335 --> 00:20:36,903
There's no judgment, man.
503
00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:38,822
Look, I don't know what
y'all think is going on.
504
00:20:38,905 --> 00:20:41,408
I just want a lawyer to help me
with some VC I got coming in.
505
00:20:41,508 --> 00:20:44,243
VC? I don't know that gang,
506
00:20:44,377 --> 00:20:46,746
but if they want smoke,
they can get it, too.
507
00:20:46,879 --> 00:20:48,515
Wait, wait. Hold on, Pop.
508
00:20:48,615 --> 00:20:50,483
VC?
509
00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,502
Like, venture capital?
510
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:53,586
Yes.
511
00:20:53,686 --> 00:20:55,288
Yes. The reason I need a lawyer
512
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:57,790
is because I got some guys
who want to partner with me
513
00:20:57,890 --> 00:21:00,727
for a new app
that I've developed.
514
00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:01,894
But, wait-wait.
515
00:21:02,028 --> 00:21:03,262
When you came to my house,
516
00:21:03,363 --> 00:21:06,098
you were acting
so mysterious and dodgy.
517
00:21:06,198 --> 00:21:07,684
Yeah, that's because
the old heads in my family
518
00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:09,287
told me that's how
you retain a lawyer.
519
00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:10,687
Drop by their house
and don't show 'em
520
00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,405
who you truly are
until you trust them.
521
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:14,491
So you were just acting?
522
00:21:14,574 --> 00:21:15,659
Yeah.
523
00:21:15,742 --> 00:21:17,243
Do you know how scary it was
524
00:21:17,344 --> 00:21:19,363
carrying around all that cash
when I could have just
525
00:21:19,446 --> 00:21:21,514
sent it to you online?
526
00:21:21,614 --> 00:21:22,882
Oh, man.
527
00:21:22,982 --> 00:21:24,417
I feel you on that.
528
00:21:24,551 --> 00:21:25,652
I also got issues
529
00:21:25,752 --> 00:21:27,587
with an old head not trusting me
530
00:21:27,687 --> 00:21:29,756
to do things on my own.
531
00:21:29,856 --> 00:21:32,992
I guess we should have just
trusted our instincts.
532
00:21:34,193 --> 00:21:36,363
So, wait, hold on. Why'd y'all
come in deep like this?
533
00:21:36,463 --> 00:21:39,031
Oh, well, this is Pepper.
He's my software engineer.
534
00:21:39,131 --> 00:21:40,584
-He helped me develop the app.
-Nice to meet you.
535
00:21:40,667 --> 00:21:42,352
This is Julian.
He's the project manager.
536
00:21:42,435 --> 00:21:43,936
And this right here,
537
00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:45,304
this is my best friend, Chris.
538
00:21:45,405 --> 00:21:46,706
-I'm very supportive.
-Oh.
539
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:48,575
He's very supportive.
540
00:21:48,675 --> 00:21:49,959
Wait, but hold up, man.
I thought you were doing
541
00:21:50,042 --> 00:21:50,943
all things under the radar.
542
00:21:51,043 --> 00:21:52,111
What made you think that?
543
00:21:52,211 --> 00:21:54,313
I mean,
we're meeting in a closed
544
00:21:54,414 --> 00:21:55,699
flooring store after hours,
545
00:21:55,782 --> 00:21:58,050
and your security
won't stop mean mugging me.
546
00:21:58,150 --> 00:22:00,119
Oh, uh, she can't help herself.
547
00:22:00,219 --> 00:22:01,488
I'm Aunt Toni, baby.
548
00:22:01,588 --> 00:22:03,239
It's nice to meet you.
549
00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:04,882
And congratulations on
all your success.
550
00:22:05,625 --> 00:22:08,294
I'm Flaco.
I'm the Chris of this group.
551
00:22:10,296 --> 00:22:11,715
If you're not
pushing all that weight,
552
00:22:11,798 --> 00:22:13,633
why is your name Teddy Grams?
553
00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:15,251
Oh, they used to call me that
at computer camp
554
00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,637
because I was always
disabling the cookies.
555
00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:21,474
Damn, Crutch, you pretty tough.
556
00:22:21,574 --> 00:22:24,511
You almost beat up
The Big Bang Theory.
557
00:22:25,612 --> 00:22:27,814
♪
558
00:22:32,819 --> 00:22:35,187
♪ ♪
559
00:22:35,287 --> 00:22:37,089
Look at us,
560
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:38,425
two attorneys sitting here,
561
00:22:38,558 --> 00:22:41,928
basking in the glow of justice.
562
00:22:42,028 --> 00:22:44,147
Except you're not an attorney.
563
00:22:44,230 --> 00:22:47,333
You're a paraleg...
You're not even a paralegal.
564
00:22:48,267 --> 00:22:50,369
Well, I was today,
and I killed it.
565
00:22:51,170 --> 00:22:53,205
Yeah, yeah, you did.
566
00:22:53,305 --> 00:22:55,625
But I am still going to have
to let you go as my paralegal.
567
00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:57,827
Consider this
your exit interview.
568
00:22:57,910 --> 00:22:59,496
Hmm. You can keep this job.
569
00:22:59,579 --> 00:23:01,814
I'm gonna stick to linoleum.
570
00:23:02,682 --> 00:23:03,850
Did I just hear
571
00:23:03,950 --> 00:23:06,118
that there's a job
for a paralegal?
572
00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:08,672
You know, my résumé is fire.
573
00:23:08,755 --> 00:23:11,007
But I'm gonna need Thursdays off
574
00:23:11,090 --> 00:23:14,260
and Harriet Tubman's birthday.
575
00:23:16,195 --> 00:23:17,764
What day is that?
576
00:23:17,864 --> 00:23:19,716
I don't know.
577
00:23:19,799 --> 00:23:23,836
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
578
00:23:26,673 --> 00:23:29,275
♪ Sometimes life can deal you ♪
579
00:23:29,375 --> 00:23:32,044
♪ A messed-up hand ♪
580
00:23:33,846 --> 00:23:36,816
-♪ But when it hits the fan ♪
-♪ Hits the ♪
581
00:23:36,916 --> 00:23:38,150
♪ Never fear ♪
582
00:23:38,284 --> 00:23:40,553
♪ The Crutch is here ♪
583
00:23:43,089 --> 00:23:46,926
♪ Crutchfield, Crutchfield ♪
584
00:23:47,026 --> 00:23:49,228
♪ He keeps it real ♪
585
00:23:49,328 --> 00:23:53,566
-♪ Crutchfield, whoa! ♪
-♪ Whoa! ♪
586
00:23:54,366 --> 00:23:56,636
What's that, bro bro?
41220
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