Original subtitles

Thank you, Giovanni.

You know what the problem is, Dorinda? I'm not listening to you lecture me

tonight. Congratulations, my darling.

Thumbs up.

Don't throw your jealous energy at me.

See you, Dorinda. I can't wait to see what the future holds. I'm so excited.

I did it. I did it.

Obviously, we are missing somebody today. Did she come to this decision

Was there an intervention?

Do you know?

I mean, I would say that she did not come to this decision entirely on her

There were a few people there, and it was the right thing to do. I mean, I've

been speaking to her for the last month because I connected her with Dennis so

we could help her with her legal situation.

By the way, what's going on with you and Dennis?

I love him. It's kind of what you said about Scott, actually. You love him, and

he's great, and he's smart, but you want to... See if you can have an everyday

life. Everyone wants us to define what it is. It's not definable. We love each

other. I'm okay with it being totally gray.

Can you talk about Dennis?

Oh, my gosh.

So my baby's in there?

This is crazy.

This is like the biggest truck I've seen before.

Dad, the car just got delivered from Chicago.

God was so sweet to let me have this car here. Oh, my God, I'm so excited. I

know. Now I just have to learn how to drive.

Great job. Thank you. Now can you take it up to the parking garage?

All right.

You want to go potty?

You want to go potty?

Go potty?

Go potty.

He has to run to make the poop come out.

Good boy.

All right, that's it.

If I see poop on the rug, I'm going to kill you.

Victoria?

Yeah? Hi, my love.

Hey. I had a great idea. You know I have my cabaret show on Monday in the city.

And you know what I've added to the show?

What? The Girl Code song.

Would you come up on stage and sing it with me?

Yeah. That's awesome.

You guys look amazing.

Keep calm and we'll all be cool.

And then maybe they'll let us jump in the pool after.

I read it.

I've debated it to sell it, and then I like it so much I really don't want to

leave. So how do you differentiate this apartment from all of the other

inventory that's out there?

Don't ask me. That's where we throw in a little showbiz razzle -dazzle. Well,

you can razzle me with your eyes. Are you sure you're dead?

I'm pretty sure.

You have really gorgeous eyes. I'm married to him.

Damn.

Well, well, well. Well, look who it's here.

Look who is here.

Only you would be in the park with your glasses on.

How are you?

Well, you know. Is it hot enough for you?

You ready? I want to melt off some inches today.

Like a real walk. You're looking good.

Do you see a difference?

Yeah, you've lost a lot of weight. So you know what? You kind of inspired me

because you were doing that boot camp and then Carol.

As I said, if Carol can do it, I can do it.

I'm back in the city. I spent most of the summer as I normally do in the

Berkshires. And I really decided to spend a lot of time just doing me. So my

life has really been just exercising, thinking healthy, being healthy.

What was it that started you? I just realized nothing good happens when you

a couple drinks. And I don't handle alcohol well.

But have you always been like that if you drink?

I don't care if you were the biggest heroin addict.

I would never shave you. I would invite you to my house and say, what the f***

is going on?

Who would know? I was drinking.

No, I didn't know if other people had said before, oh, you know, you can turn

you get nasty or something that maybe set you off.

That was a Luannism.

I'm not starting. Don't say that. You should start.

That was her loaded question.

Deflecting from herself.

Yeah. I mean... Well, she's not really one to talk right now, is she?

Let's think about it. In a year and a half, in a year and a half, let's go

through it.

These are her erratic decisions.

Married.

Divorced. I felt like...

The water was just tumbling in, and I couldn't keep my head above the water. I

was drowning.

Arrested. Don't touch me.

Don't touch me. I'm going to kill you.

Assaulted a police officer.

That's crazy.

Some people don't even do that in a lifetime. Went to rehab.

How are you feeling?

I'm good. I'm good. I'm on my way home.

How do you feel?

I feel really, really good.

Came out of rehab.

Was still drinking the whole time.

Went back into rehab.

Luann could not be here with us. It's our understanding that she is seeking

treatment. I mean, I wish her well.

It's not healthy for her and I to be around each other for different reasons.

had a very long relationship with Luann. We've been through a lot. For God's

sakes, I was her bridesmaid. Do you know, at this moment, we're just in a

where we need a minute.

Oh, look who's coming by, baby.

Uh -oh, uh -oh, uh -oh. Work,

work.

Oh.

I'm not sure about that top knot. Are you?

It could look good. It could look good. I love it at night.

Grab his ponytail the next time around.

Gina here.

I'm here, baby.

Hi. Hi.

Who's hungry?

You know, I'm a little hungry.

And I brought you shishito.

No, shishito is a makeup.

Shishito.

Maybe we should, like, mix in these vegetables, too.

I don't know what else. I got a lot of stuff.

I'm hungry, too.

Good. Oh, you didn't eat. Hi.

Oh, just leather shorts on Tumbleweed Tuesday. It's 850 degrees out. I promise

you, I put them on, I knew you were going to say something.

No, well, women, it's supposed to wear them fall, winter.

Yeah. Are you sad about the end of the summer?

He's a little sad.

Time flies, right?

Yeah. Well, we've been, you know, tag -teaming, making sure you're okay.

You guys have been amazing. I'm going to start crying, so I don't want to say

it.

Dennis passed away three weeks ago in his apartment.

Tyler, his daughter, called me, hysterically crying, and she said, my

this morning.

And I started screaming into the phone.

The Brynn element was another sucker punch.

She said, Mom, does Dennis still have a phone number or a phone?

So I said, yeah, because I texted him after he passed away, just like, it's so

weird to do something like that. Like, I just wrote him a letter, which was

like, I love you, Dennis, and I always will. You're the most loving, beautiful

man in the whole world, and I'm sorry you're in so much pain now you can't

really sleep.

So she goes, I want to text him.

So she texted under that, hi, with the hand.

Dennis, how are you doing today? We miss you.

Kissy face. I and Biggie Smalls miss you too from Brynn. And then yesterday

morning she goes, do you think Dennis got my text?

That breaks my heart. I know, me too.

She said, I miss you. I wish you were here today.

I know.

I'm so sad.

Oh, I've never in my life experienced this, like, moment, this feeling, this

hysteria. You know, someone told me that he fell the day before on a boat, and

then did he take something because he was in pain?

But it doesn't matter. He's dead. Like, it doesn't matter. Let's figure out what

happened. Let me put the pieces of the puzzle together. Somebody tell me how

they feel. His daughter, his son, he was doing this last week. He wrote me 50

texts. He wanted to marry me. I have a ring on my finger.

He's dead. It doesn't matter. He's gone. There's nothing to say.

I mean, how long is this supposed to be until you start to feel normal?

It's going to take a while to shake it out. Last year.

But you had their friend who died.

Yeah, two friends died last year. And how long does it last? It was a year,

know. What was the beginning trauma? Like I'm feeling like hysteria, like

bad? Yeah, it was bad.

You know, you have good days and bad days.

And then when I talked about it, I don't think they'd want me that way.

Yeah, I thought of that too. Right.

Time is healing the wounds a little more than I thought. It's going faster.

And then I feel guilty.

Like, how could you be having fun when Dennis is dead? But I'm trying to do

he would want me to do.

Well, you were doing great this summer with him, without him. You were like on

nice little wave. And then you got thrown for, you know, life can be sad.

guess the bottom line is enjoy it.

So cheers to that.

I guess living every day like it's our last. All right, so we're taking our

off and we're having an orgy.

It's our last day on Earth.

Again. I'm waiting.

Again? Did you say again? Mm -hmm. Again.

Coming up.

I can't tell you how, um... And I... What?

My kids.

calm down. We have no food.

I can't move in here. I'm bruised. My closets were bigger than this.

I feel

so

much lighter not living the day -to -day bustle at the townhouse. I love the

simplicity of the smaller apartment.

Each day I get up, I feel really fresh.

I'm in the park every morning and...

I have a really deep connection with the poodle now.

Well, wait till I tell you this.

The kid wants pink, and I kept saying, no pink.

Pink where? What do you mean pink? She wants to paint this room pink. No.

not pink. No. No.

No. I forbid it. So the guy came yesterday. We picked out all different

and we're going to do paint samples. I'll have you come back and look at the

pink. No, gross.

She wants black lacquer doors. With pink walls?

Yeah.

It's going to look disgusting.

Pink walls with lacquer, navy, or black doors?

No. I'd get a headache visiting her there. I don't think I can come back and

visit if it's like that.

Does it feel liberating not to be living there anymore? I mean, how does it

feel? Because you look really happy. I mean, you have this glow on your face.

Your eyes are bright and sparkly. You too.

Actually, I'm glad to see that you look so happy because, you know, my

apartment's going on the market, and I'm really nervous.

I knew it.

I knew it. I was going to judge the way I would feel by you, so I'm feeling like

you're good. Oh, you'll feel so much lighter. And I need something new and

fresh. You know, I'm ready.

That's nice.

You're coming out to the Hamptons next weekend, right? I'm coming out with

Tinsley. She called me up and said, let's ride out together, which is fun.

Oh, I'm so happy.

Honestly, I have a little twinge of guilt because I don't want Bethany to be

alone. But I had also said to be, maybe you should be.

with your darling, you know, Brynn, and just go through all these emotions, and

I'll just be right there if you need me. I'm just a stone throw away.

Death is just very difficult to deal with. It's a reflection, a mirror image

how, like, your time is limited here on Earth. You know, it makes us, sometimes

we think we're just infallible, we're going to live forever.

So it's very difficult.

It's very difficult.

When I heard the news about Dennis, I sent Bethany a text to say I'm so sorry.

feel bad that Bethany lost her friend Dennis. She doesn't.

I have that many close friends, and I know she relied on him in a lot of ways,

so I feel badly.

It's more like an outside or inside dog. I always forget.

He likes it out in the park. That's sort of double -edged. So now every day he

looks at me like, Mom, let's go!

And he wants to go three, four times a day. He has his friends now.

Actually, they say people can meet, you know, do you meet any nice men with

dogs? That could be a way to meet a nice guy.

No, I have to meet a guy through friends of mine, not through friends of his.

Okay.

Because he goes by Sniff.

Well, I've seen you sniff a few times.

It's true. I do like the way men smell. That's for sure.

He starts from the butt, though. I start from the back of the neck.

Ashton, we're lucky that did not collapse.

Wow.

Hi, my love. Hi.

I'm just charging my Vespas. Oh, my God. You know what? I have to go to the

village. You want to take a ride?

Yes. I just got back from - Do you know how to ride a Vespa?

Yes, of course. I know how to ride a motorcycle.

What, are you kidding?

You do? I know how to change a tire. I know how to change - Well, I know you're

Miss DYI. Come on.

Barbara Kay and I met about 15 years ago.

I had just moved from Switzerland, and I didn't really have any friends.

Both of our sons went to summer camp together, so I met her while the

were playing in the sand pit.

That's for you to take home.

That's all yours, Bam Bam. And the vase and everything?

That's your gift for your house.

Oh, and I have an espresso machine for you.

Oh, my God. Are you going to teach me how to use it? I'm spoiling you. You

why? Because you're Sugar Lou.

That too.

You saved me, I tell you. And I would do it again. I needed to go back.

You know, this whole thing with the kids really was upsetting.

Yeah. It was too overwhelming, and I didn't have the tools that I needed from

the first time around, so I'm glad I went back. Before the summer, I felt

really needed a change in my life, so I fell in love with upstate, fell in love

with the house, but I really couldn't get a bank loan enough to buy the house

upstate, so I wanted to sell my property in the Hamptons. but the children

didn't like that very much. The lawsuit alleges that she was supposed to set up

a trust for the kids when she sold the original house.

Is that right? I mean, listen, yes.

They stopped me with their father by putting a hold on it legally. That

was upsetting to me, and so that kind of threw me off the rails, and I had to

relapse and had to go back to rehab.

But when the hit the fan for me, and it literally did, you came to my rescue

with Bethany.

And I will never forget it. Oh, I love you.

When Luann had her intervention, I was there with Bethany and Anne.

We were part of the Charlie's Angels team to help Luann. She wasn't of sound

mind and body. She was a mess.

I did watch the mistake she made with Tom.

I was not about to watch Luann make a detrimental mistake to her

life. And it was the right time to go back to rehab.

I'm 52 days sober today.

No, 53.

Give me a high five. 53. I lost count.

But I have my meetings out here. I love it. Do you go every day? I go every day.

Right. And I can't tell you how... And I... What?

For my kids.

Aw, what are you... Aw.

I feel again.

My kids.

And that they see me sober is so great.

Yeah. And you're such a good model right now for Victoria and Noel. My daughter

is... I know.

I can't sleep again.

You won't. You won't. You won't. You won't. I promise.

Going back to rehab for the second time, I was not proud of myself.

I failed. It's not easy to keep that promise to yourself and live a sober

I take it day by day, and it's a struggle.

Now let's go have lunch. I'm starving. Yeah, me too. Can we take the Vespas?

Let's take the Vespas.

All right, here we go.

Coming up.

No, actually, I've got to reverse it.

Oh, my gosh.

I'm, like, really nervous. It's in reverse, right?

Mm -hmm. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.

Thank you. Cheers.

Cheers.

Oh,

are you here? Are you here? You're pink and your hair is so pretty. I love it.

I'm good. How are you? You're finally back from your tour.

How is Scott?

He's great. He's great. You know, last year we traveled a lot. We did go to

Europe a little bit this summer, which was so fun.

But then this year, just to be in Chicago and be settled, and for me, too,

in one place. You could play house. I know. Dinner, normal dinner. I know. We

had a party that he had for his employees. I got to, like, play hostess,

felt, like, so happy. I was, like, got, like, food and different things. I know.

I think people are, like, oh, thank you for having me to your house. I'm, like,

oh, you're so welcome. Thanks for coming.

I'm an optimist.

And I believe that now my relationship with God is just a lot different and

better.

We've always talked about marriage and babies. And he knows what shape of ring

want and what size.

I mean, so we're on that same page.

Did you cook?

You don't cook? I helped organize the caterers, and I helped to go to the

grocery store and buy some extra things that we needed. I'm going to give you a

little secret. We do need to do that. There's been many nights, John doesn't

even know it to this day, where I have ordered in, plated it, and put it in the

oven, pulled it out as if I made it. I can't.

He's like, I didn't know you knew how to cook, blah, blah, blah, blah. I know.

It's all about the presentation.

What he doesn't know doesn't hurt him.

I'm so into this cordovan color. Are you guys looking for anything in

particular?

Hamptons. But you know what? It is supposed to be a little cooler this

Oh, really? These are cute.

Oh, that looks like your style.

Yeah.

Luann wears a lot of this stuff.

Have you talked to Luann?

Nope. No.

I don't know all the facts of what's going on with Luann and Dorinda. I feel

like now it's a few big egos and this is like not working out.

You haven't spoken to Bethany?

No. Oh, my God. No, I mean, I reached out, of course, when that happened. I

can't imagine.

I reached out to her. You know, it's a funny thing, having not to bring it up,

but having gone through it. In these times, she needs people that are super

close around her. And when she wants to have a chat about something, I have it.

If she doesn't, then I won't.

We've all been through things like this, and you've got to let... People do

things at their own pace.

There's really nothing you can say besides, I'm sorry if you need me, call.

Because it just is such a personal journey.

Hey, Tinsley, I think I like this.

I think I might like these, too, but I can't. Oh, cute.

I love it. You're tan, too.

I'm tan. Well, you know I get very tan. Well, I found out from that Ancestry

thing I have a little bit of Moroccan in me.

Oh, how exciting. How exciting. I love it.

Are you making a little different person? Polish, Italian.

That's a good album. How do you think I've kept that Armenian happy all these

years? Food.

Exactly.

What is Taylor doing?

Toast. Made with love, I guess.

Come in.

Taylor?

Sorry. I'm like, what is all that noise? It's taking so long. I'm like, what are

you making today? Is it the oatmeal or the toast?

Toast. Oh, I like the toast. Peanut butter and honey. I like the toast

get the honey in there.

And the... Let me take that.

You have the shoe folder?

Yes, I have the shoe folder. I'll grab it.

We have to make sure they're being shipped out on time. Okay. I feel now

the two fashion collections and the shoes and things to come, I'm so super

So Taylor's just a breath of fresh air. The light is coming in so much now.

We got to put the towel back up. When I called these blind guys, Leo's like,

we're not putting the blinds in until we measure and you paint. Yeah.

Are you doing pink in your room too? I wanted yellow, but people said yellow's

not flattering.

Reminds me of like an older lady.

Yellow.

Which you're not.

I feel so great in my new apartment. Would I have liked things to have been

painted faster and have the blinds up right away so I wouldn't be so sleep

-deprived? Yes. When you don't sleep, you get the cortisol value. You get that

blubber coming back. I don't need that.

Mr. Netflix and chill guy's coming over, so I want to have this up.

So you got this? Okay, you got tape. Towel tape, towel tape. No, it's this

because you see the restaurant?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, they have whole tables of people looking in. I had motorized

curtains that were Pashmina at the townhouse, and now I'm putting up

duct -taped towels.

I don't want this to fall down in the middle of something good.

Should we get the sides?

Can you imagine I'm about to come, and then this thing falls down? I'll be

I'll kill you. It's not that great.

Hopefully you wouldn't notice. It's so...

I'll notice.

Listen, I'm not a desperate housewife. Let's calm down.

I'm just being a woman.

All right, this looks better. At least I want my monogram because that's classy.

Coming up.

Now it's true.

I have to kick weight. Weight, beautiful.

Me like it. Can you feel it? I'm feeling it. I'm feeling it in the air. I feel a

lot of different things.

I'm not feeding you yet. Sorry.

It's not dinner time.

Oh, this is cute.

Hi. Hello, Ramon. Hi. Come on in.

I'm Boris.

Nice to meet you.

I don't know why I just did that. I'm a little nervous, to tell you the truth.

Really? Yeah, I am. I know, because water always makes us nervous.

No, well, I'm not a good swimmer.

I was talking to my girlfriend, Tina, saying I really need to learn how to

This is, like, ridiculous. I can't swim. I always sink.

And she said, oh, my God, I have the best guy.

He's, like, expensive but excellent, and he's so personable and handsome and

good at what he does. I'm like, sign me up. And the reason why I'm having you

here today was because I was away on vacation with some girlfriends, and we

on this boat, and we weren't sure if everyone was going to capsize, and I

realized I don't swim.

No! I can't swim.

Like if I went out in the ocean, I would die.

Right.

Well, don't smile. It's not funny. I know. Well, you're laughing.

I'm not. I'm smiling.

You're smiling.

You're not supposed to smile. I could be dead.

No, but like kind of hysterical smile.

Okay, fine.

All right, so should we just go outside? Absolutely.

All right, Coco, we'll see you in a bit, baby cake. But I don't know if I'll be

able to concentrate on the swimming because you're very cute.

Interesting.

We are kind of learning most of time as a copycats and the easiest way to do by

watching somebody and doing like after the matter of fact old Technological

progress including like Olympian.

Yeah swim for the summer I'm just gonna go with you in the water

and so Breaststroke it's a stroke when you can see with the face above the

Exactly.

Flirting, I got down pat.

Floating, I need a little help with.

I'm distracting you. I can only do the breaststroke. I have good breath.

That's fine.

I say so myself.

You see, you're pretty flexible, which is excellent. Yes, I'm very flexible.

Beautiful. Me like this. Can you feel it? I'm feeling it. I'm feeling it in

air. I feel a lot of different things.

Good. I definitely need Boris for another lesson, don't you think?

I mean, I think I could, like, use something more than just swim lessons.

Which color would you like?

Like an yellow, like an yellow.

All girls choose a yellow.

Oh,

cool. Okay.

Okay.

It's up here.

Are you ready? Not really.

I know. Well, I mean, I need some of that Diet Coke. I need to perk myself up

because I'm driving.

Oh. What?

Wait, I've got to figure out. What?

My car.

Well, Scott's car, but, you know. I was going to say, where did we get this?

The Bentley's sort of like we're inching closer to the ring, right? Because

that's a statement.

Oh, my God. We're going in style.

Yes. Well, hopefully I can drive it.

Sending the car to New York. She's been going to Chicago.

These are all good signs.

But don't tell Dale.

We don't want to get her hopes up.

This car's expensive.

I feel for you. All right, Sonya, hold on. Mm -hmm.

Okay, that's drive.

Are you kissing me? You know what? Actually, I got to reverse it.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

You might want to reverse just to have a little room.

Oh, my God. I'm, like, really nervous. It's in reverse, right?

Mm -hmm. Oh, my God. I have not driven in over five years.

Okay, guys. But I was always a good driver before, so I think I'll still be

now.

Ah!

I can drive.

I mean, yeah. Let's touch you brakes.

I'm very nervous.

People know. No, I am a good driver, but I am a control freak.

Super touchy. Okay. Marley, don't worry. Okay, don't worry about it. I should

have given Marley a Xanax. Don't worry.

We're on our way, Marley. I want to stay alert.

I like to take the bus.

But I'm going to let Tinsley drive me because she's excited, and it's time

spent with my friend.

White -knuckled, of course.

Oh, no.

Am I supposed to go right now?

Yep, turn left.

Did you put your blinker on? I am, I am, but... I know how to drive. I mean,

I've driven for years, but I don't think if you wanted to give me a driving test

again that I'd maybe be able to pass it. I mean, I don't know. You're doing

great. Blinking yellow?

What does that even mean?

That's like something new. It means go slowly left. Okay. But you're doing

great. I also don't even really know how to get to the Hamptons and the city

and, like, Midtown Tunnel versus... I don't even know where...

Triborough Bridge. I don't even know.

Oh, my God. Get away from me. Oh, they'll scare me. Yeah.

Motorcycle men. I know.

So it's great. At least he's wearing a helmet.

Sorry. Hold on.

I'm getting over. I'm sorry. You can go now. You can go now. You can go now.

That guy was trying to slow down. Sorry. You can trust me when I say go. Lou

says just go, and it's like, it's not okay to go. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

you. But when I say go, it's true, because I don't want to die.

Lou, she's just like, ah, just go.

Coming up.

I was bringing the next candle, and I brought it in this beautiful Lou and

I don't want it. No, it goes. We'll give it. We'll give it to George. I don't

want to touch it. Bad luck.

Can I bring anything inside yet?

No, because it's, like, so humid that when they walk in, I'll just throw

everything out, but I appreciate it.

I haven't had people over, you know, in a real, like, putting out a fish platter

and having, like, a little luncheon. I haven't done that for a while, and so I

decided that it would be a good idea for Luann and Barbara to come over,

especially since I haven't seen either of these women since Luann's house on

intervention weekend.

And the going gets rough. Wait, I have to leave. I have to go get flowers.

I can't come. No, I can't come empty -handed.

Wait, wait, wait. No, no. I got a better one.

You always need a pie and a tool kit. Can you imagine if I came empty -handed?

Yeah. What the hell is wrong with me? That's a perfect gift. Thank God I

have one in the car.

I have a line of tools out there called Diva by Barbara Kay.

You're my D -Y -I guru.

D -I -Y. Oh, D -I -Y. So that's why I always have a spare toolkit in my car.

Come in.

Hello. Hi.

Hi. How are you? Good. How are you doing?

Hi, Bea.

How are you? Good. How are you doing? I'm good. Hi. Good to see you.

I haven't seen you for a minute. I haven't seen you for a while. You know

the going gets rough, chocolate mousse pie. Put it behind your face. I like it.

Put it behind your face.

I like it.

Hi. I'm okay. How are you?

So good to see you.

That was really nice. Thank you for the text.

I didn't bring flowers, but I brought you one of my new tool kits in black.

Oh, amazing.

No, I have the pink. Right. I like that it's in black. Thank you so much. You

can move the black to your apartment in New York.

Exactly. That's great.

Exactly. Yeah.

I've known Barbara peripherally for years.

Barbara and Luann's relationship has always been a little bit of an enigma to

me, but they both live in the Hamptons.

Hamptons people tend to gravitate to each other. Are you guys hungry?

I actually am. I'm hungry. I came from yoga, so I'm hungry. You want me to

this out?

Yes. I just had a weird, right before you came, I was like all okay, and then

just had like a weird text.

Okay. Dennis' daughter just sent me a picture of him. It's the cutest picture.

When he was happy, he was so happy.

I'm okay. I'm totally fine. I just got a little thrown off, so I was like not.

You walked in. I had just been like crying. I'm fine.

I'm totally fine, but I just had a weird. I'm not going to hug you now. I

you. If I hug you, you'll make it fun. But I just am acting weird, and so I

to explain it. So I'm fine.

Right. But.

Well, listen.

It's your right to be fine, not to be fine. Okay. I know. I like need

to do.

What do I do? I take a hammer when I don't feel good, and I start pounding

something. Like it's really therapeutic to use tools.

You like to pound things, but you know.

Oh, yeah. Ha, ha, ha. That's very funny.

Come on. If we can't laugh.

Stop tossing the salad.

Let's put the oven on maybe 200 so we can keep this warm in the oven.

And I think we have to take the tops off and cover it.

Here we are.

Did I have tomatoes?

Maybe I should put out some guacamole for when they come.

What do you think? Salt the guac. Which one?

I'll do the guac.

Save this also for later.

Hello?

Who's there?

Who do you think? Who's always the first to arrive?

Da Linda.

It's my Da Linda.

You got a package at your door.

Hi. How you doing? You look pretty. Thank you. I want to look better.

Okay, do you need some help?

Okay, you know I always bring you the next candle.

But I love it. You know I always bring it, so I sent it. And I brought it in

this beautiful Lou and Tom.

Oh, they gave it for the wedding?

Now you can have it. No, I don't want it. It's bad luck. I don't want it.

We'll give it to Georgia. I don't want to touch it. It's bad luck. Georgia, can

you hold this?

I'll just take what's inside.

So what happened with Sonia? Did you invite her for lunch or for dinner

We know she's over at Ramona's, which is... Is she over there now?

I don't know. She said she was staying with Ramona.

We've been texting. I said she could stay with me.

For one night, but I feel like she felt... Ramona always guilts her into

in. Yeah, and I'm like, fine, don't say it. It's all good.

Dorinda was supposed to come with us today, but then she wants to drive out

herself. Really?

She must listen to those audio books. She's worried about seeing Luann.

I wouldn't be nervous about Luann.

Dorinda should say to herself, it's not about me, it's about Luann. She's hurt.

I thought about the whole Luann thing, and that's why I wanted to drive out by

myself. You have to be unemotional for a second. She's in a very bad place.

She may look superficially like she's good. Oh, I have my cabaret, darling.

performing here, darling. But inside, she's really a broken girl right now.

She's broken, and she's trying to cover it up, and she's not acting rashly.

Because you went to rehab for 30 days and then 15 days doesn't make you, you

know, an expert on everyone's life. Part of that whole healing is just to be.

Like I said, humble.

The wind's never been humble. It's cold space. Well, it's so funny because

remember you'd always say that to me and I'd say, I don't know that side of her

because I never saw that. Yeah, no. She's in a bad place.

Ramona is such a liar.

Right. She made up this story of me at this party at Chris Birch's house. It

didn't happen. I know that. I thought I was there. She was with me. She was with

me. Did all of you suspect that she was drinking again?

She was at Chris Birch's party recently. She was asked to leave.

You go to me, I want to leave. I'm done.

Too many people drinking, I don't want to stay. Yeah, so we left. You and I

drove away in the car, and that was it. Why would she make that up? Oh, my God,

because she loves spreading lies. You know this woman who is awful. You know

her?

Ramona?

Look at her face. Yes, I know her.

Luann and I were at Harlow. Remember when they used to have reggae night?

Luann and I were dancing, and she was right there kind of dancing along with

And she looked at Luann. She goes, why is she here?

I swear to God. And Luann goes, because she's my friend.

She said that about Berber.

Why? Why does she give a shit who's there? Who knows? That's what I'm

That's how I know Ramona. Wow. That's the last time you saw her?

No, I've run into her places, and she acts like she doesn't know me or she's

never met me before. Everyone says about her. Same thing. Does to everybody.

I mean, I've probably met Ramona, I don't know, 15 times over the years, and

would meet her again, and she would have no recollection of who I am. And I have

kind of like a distinctive face. I mean, like, I don't think I'm so forgettable,

but apparently she does.

Listen, Ramona has always been a thorn in my side, or let's call it the

stinger is always in there. Right.

But my real issue is Dorinda and how I'm going to deal with that. Because, you

know, she has so much anger and resentment towards me. And it's really

herself, if you really think about it. What's her general gripe about? Was it

that she's counting? Because she's like, I was there for her. I was there. How

was she there for me? Maybe she was. Maybe she wasn't. But what's the

She spoke to me a lot when I was in Florida when I went to rehab there. Oh,

she's supposed to. That's fine. Don't even mention it. But that's my friend.

why are you saying I was there for you? Because she uses it as an excuse.

This is two people that are both. in a standoff. I know from personal

that the small things build up and then it becomes big things and it's a loose

horse. I think, you know, there's a lot of hatred going on within herself

somehow. That's how I feel about when I see her face. I feel like it's not the

Dorinda that I know.

Coming up.

Here's the thing. I'm definitely really hurt by it. I've been playing like it's

okay. Oh my God, don't cry.

You think Dorinda tries to reach out to me? Say, hey, Lou, let's get together.

No. She is in the Hamptons. So are you.

Yes. But it's your town. She doesn't live here. She lives in the Berkshires.

Lou. She's here. She's staying with Ramona.

Right. If she doesn't reach out and say, hey, Lou, I'd like to see you. If she

did, what would you say? Guess what? She hasn't done that.

You know, I haven't seen her since March.

Right. I haven't either. I haven't spoken to her since March.

You know, she was on, you know, this summer. You kept saying ignore. She said

mean -spirited things, right? Awful.

Because here's the thing. I'm definitely really hurt by it. I've been playing

like a doko.

Oh, my God, don't cry.

Oh, I do. I feel hurt by it. No, because she can't help herself. She's not in a

good place. And I've never seen her this weekend. No, no, no. Okay, now you're

making me upset that you're crying. What people don't realize is Dorinda has a

heart of gold. She gets really angry fast, but then she forgets it fast.

Are you inviting her to the Clambake? I am. Oh, Jesus.

You're friends with her? Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah. I've known

forever.

Oh, so what are you trying to do, matchmaker, matchmaker, make me an

Dorinda has given no sign of remorse for the way she behaved, and I'm frankly

not interested in seeing her unless she reaches out, because I'm certainly not.

What did I say that was so bad? I said the truth.

What did I say that was so bad? I heard her feelings, and you said you're sorry

and move on. But months ago. I mean, Bethany said much worse to all of us.

now seven months ago.

I would love for Dorinda and Luann to work it out, but Luann is on this high

horse, holier than thou, more than she's ever been. This is on a whole nother

level. I don't want to argue with Dorinda. So I don't know if I'm coming

clam bake. I really don't want to see her right now. I don't think I'm ready.

Whoa.

You really might not go? Yeah. I don't know if I can deal with it right now.

Then you might have to not invite Dorinda. Because truth be told, she's in

recovery 55 days. If she's saying it's going to be emotionally upsetting for

her. You have to do what's truthful to you. I don't want to see Ramona either.

was hoping.

Well, neither do I.

She's not very stable right now. I haven't seen her personally, but I've

from her very close friends. They said something is very off with her. They're

very concerned. I'm not going to confront her. It's not going to change

anything. And I don't want to confront her.

I just don't want, I want us to stop.

I want us to just give each other space. It happens sometimes. I mean, she

almost feels like she thinks I'm going to bend a knee to her. You know, like,

oh, she's, and I'm not. If she thinks for a second that she's going to be

sanctimonious to me or self -righteous.

It's certainly not going to help to mend our relationship.

It's done. You know what? Maybe she'll come to her senses on her own. I don't,

listen, I know some other friends. I don't want to have her in my life right

now. Right now, I don't think it's a, we just need space.

I'm not going to apologize to a woman who offended me, hurt me.

Right now, I'm still not healed.

I don't need the trigger. I really don't need a trigger.

With that being said, can you pass the guacamole? Yes.

Hey, hooker. Oh, you.

I just thought it was an everyday person calling me a hooker again. Oh, my God.

This season on The Real Housewives of New York City.

Squeeze.

Squeeze. Oh, no.

Just give her a call and be like, hey. No, I'm sorry.

Just own that you heckled the Giovanni. I didn't heckle the Giovanni.

What? This has got to end because I will not get sick over this. Until I have a

ring on my finger, I'm not going to leave New York. You look up insecure in

dictionary and there's Tinsley.

We have to pull you out of this.

Imagine Bluestone Manor on Halloween.

If this is the worst thing that your friend Jill has ever done, I should get

Medal of Honor. Why is she talking about my back at all, saying any negative

thing about me whatsoever in any capacity?

You're like good -looking guys with a washboard. Hi. It's you.

You're beautiful.

Hi, handsome. I admit it, I'm into hot sex. Oh, my God.

There was a lot in my mind about him dying. I could not get off the ride. I

guilty that the only way that I got off the ride is that he's dead.

So I saw my parole officer for the first time today.

Dorinda looks like a lightweight.

When I say to you, don't do something, you better do well while I listen.

We're in Miami.

Fabulous. Girls, are we going to have fun?

Go, Tinsley. Go to sleep now.

Oh, my God.

Welcome to Christmas with the Countess.

Nine months ago, I was in jail, and now I'm a cabaret star.

I can't even believe you act this way. Cabaret, cabaret, cabaret all day. Life

is not a cabaret.

You should apologize.

You're the only one that wants to talk all the time. You are insufferable.

Don't touch those letters.

Don't tell me what to say. I'll say whatever I f***ing want.

Are you kidding me right now, bitch? You're a psycho.

Stay out of it. Make me.

I'm miserable.

Now you're being a bulls***.

Don't touch me. Because you're not listening.

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