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All right, today's show truly is a
warning sign for every parent watching.
We're going to meet these seemingly
innocent 16-year-old identical twins.
But in reality, they're not innocent.
They're violent. They're destructive.
And in fact, they're downright
dangerous, especially to each other.
Now, the moment we heard the extent and
frequency of the twins violence, we
accelerated our process to get the whole
family here. I feel they're in dire
straits. So, we got them here before
something serious happened. Take a look.
Our 16-year-old identical twins are out
of control. Drew and Dallas fight daily.
I hit your door and you go, "Right, try
that again." My brother and I, we fight
probably a couple times a day.
No, you no. Get out of here. Get away
from me. Dallas talks to me like I'm a
piece of trash. I egg him on because uh
he's asking for it. And then I said no.
And then you started flipping your
[Music]
Drew and Dallas have done damage to our
home. That's Dallas's door. Bunch of
holes in his walls in here. It's pretty
much a mess. They've ruined their
furniture. Graffiti their bedrooms. Boys
smoke marijuana for breakfast, lunch,
and dinner.
9:00 comes every single morning. My
brother's busting down my door if it's
locked. Hey, will you smoke me a bull? I
got to go to work. I was standing by his
door. He was jump. I'm going to knock
you the out. And he's up in my face
yelling, screaming at me. So I just hit
him with a right hook and dropped him
onto my stuff.
Drew and Dallas were both charged with
domestic violence. I told the police,
"Arest him and take them away." Every
day he'd go in my room, steal my pot,
and it got to a point where you I bought
a $40 lock from my door. Within two
hours, he had jumped through my door,
busted the whole door down, knocked
himself out, cut his ear in half. Our
house is a time bomb, ready to explode.
I feel like they may come in my room in
the middle of the night and beat me in
the head with a hammer. I can't take it
anymore.
You say the twins have broken bones.
They've broken teeth. I mean, there one
of them got his teeth knocked out the
other day, right? Yes. Yeah. They've
graffitied their room. They They've
knocked holes in the door. This is their
room. It's escalated to this. This is
their room at home. Yes. Okay. So, where
have y'all been? What have you been
doing about it? We called the police. I
said, "Take them away. I I can't handle
this." Are they in charge? You get in
the middle of them, you're going to get
knocked down and nothing's going to
happen. Our police don't take them away.
So, they're in charge. Stop in. They're
in charge of our house right now. Okay.
And you say you fear they could come in
in the middle of the night and smash
your head in with a hammer. Well, you
know, that's that's an example of a
thought that has crossed my mind. Yeah.
And I thought, "Wow, it's got this bad
to where that thought entered my mind."
You say that the twins smoke marijuana
for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. They
do. Yes. And you know this because you
told this to us. I've told them a
million times that get that crap out of
my out of my house. But you you realize
that they're how old? 16. They'll be 17
next month. And they drink.
Mhm. And you know it. And you say you
know it. Mhm. So are do you worry about
being charged with contributing to the
delinquency of a minor? Yes, I do. I do.
You need to be. I know that. We are. So
they got high on mushrooms, you said.
And and Drew ran naked around the house
and around the neighborhood. Had to go
to the ER for IV fluids. Uh, Dallas
drank a fifth of Bikardi and got hit by
a truck.
Then you get a text from Drew. Dallas
knocked my teeth out. So you call the
cops. You say just take him to jail. You
say, Drew's broken his hand twice. Both
in fights
and had surgery twice on both broken
hands. And you say, "Our house is a time
bomb." And I admit to giving the twins
what they want to keep the peace. I
have. What do I do? They refuse
counseling. The police will not step in.
What do I do? We thought about running
away. We text each other last week from
work and said, "Let's get in the car.
We've got a few hundred. Let's change
our appearance. Let's just go start
over. That's how bad it is. It might
sound funny, but I'm desperate. I don't
know what to do, and I can't get any
help." So, there's drug paraphernalia
all over the house. They don't They
smoke it with their bedroom shut and the
doors there. the door open or they jump
out their bedroom. Well, problem solved
then. Yeah, we were gone. We were gone
and they made marijuana brownies not too
long ago and he came home and said,
"Wow, someone made brownies." And he ate
one.
You caught Drew in your bed having sex
with a girl. Yes. And so what do they
say when you say this is not okay? What
are you doing? Get out. We confronted
them both right then and right there.
Get out. and she got up and left. Bye.
Do dealers come to the house?
Not that I know of. Uh, ask your
husband. Yes, they have.
You're indignant. I don't know. At this
point, I'm pretty desperate.
It sounds to me like you'd say, "Well,
just wait a second. I'll get Drew or
I'll get Dallas." Oh, heavens, no. And
I'll say, "This is my house. This is not
fine. leave my house
now. And they don't. They just look at
me like, "Come on, let's go." Then what
do you do? I grab the phone and say,
"I'm gonna call the cops." And they
leave. Well, I tell you what, we're
going to hear what the twins have to say
about all this. Take a look.
I think the main problem in my household
is Drew's anger problems. He comes in,
"Give me that. Give me that." Rips it
out of my hand. I truly don't think I'm
a angry person. Drew threatened to kill
me. He's threatened to stomp me. He's
threatened to break every single thing I
have. The last time I broke my hand, my
brother and I had got into an argument
and I ended up punching him in the back
of the head. I think he's jealous of me,
but I also think that's not my problem.
I feel that since he started hanging out
with his best friend, his attitude
rubbed off on him. He thinks everything
is a competition between me and him.
I've been in a lot of fights. My brother
was just the one who was there with me,
you know, getting my back. He thinks
that I can beat his ass. I don't want to
beat his ass. I know I can. When Dallas
drinks, he drinks to get drunk. My
brother calls me, "Hey, dude. You think
you could bring me my stuff?" And I
drove up to where he was. And sure
enough, here comes my brother stumbling
down the middle of the road. He just
freaked out and he started punching the
side of my truck. I'm yelling, "I told
you, let me in this freaking cab." So, I
left and I I went straight home. I ended
up having to walk home and got hit by a
truck. That was partially my brother's
fault. If my brother didn't have his
anger problems, he would have drove me
home that night. The violence and anger
has just got to end. I'm afraid that
Drew or Dallas are going to end up dead.
You get in fights with each other.
You're wrecking cars, smoking
dope, putting graffiti in your room,
ignoring your parents. What the hell are
you thinking? All right. When I get home
from work, you know, first thing they
tell me to do, pick up the clothes. you
know, that maybe they had washed for me,
you know, so they're sitting out in the
living room. They wanted me to go hang
them up, but they're hounding me. Get
your clo get your clothes done. I need
to eat something, take a shower, then
I'm going to do it, you know. But is it
still there the next morning? A lot of
times sometimes, but it's because
honestly, are we talking about whether
he picks up his t-shirt or not? Is that
what we're here to talk about? Honest to
God, I mean, come on, guys. You can't be
that clueless.
We're really going to spend time talking
about whether he picked me because
that's what he wants to do. Like they
they nag me when I get home about
picking up my stuff. So, Dr. Phil, let's
spend some time talking about that. So,
we don't spend time talking about the
fact that I violently attack my brother,
that I knock doors down throughout the
house, I painted graffiti in my room,
wrecked the car, do drugs illegally
every day. Let's talk about picking up
my t-shirt so we don't have to talk
about that stuff. Come on. Do you not
see deflection here when it happens?
Yes. You
just Let's not talk about picking up
your t-shirt. Let's talk about you
smoking dope every day all day. Okay.
All right. Let's talk about that. What's
your theory about how that's okay? I do
it because it's my choice. I mean,
someday I'll move on and I'll It isn't
your choice. You're 16. It's illegal.
It's against the law. Okay. Then whose
choice is it? My parents. They tell You
know, they tell me I can't smoke. Okay.
That's right. because they're your
parents and they're responsible for you
and it's against the law. Okay.
I mean, not to be disrespectful, but you
know how many people are out there
smoking anyways? Do you know how many
people are sitting in that chair right
now? Yeah. You. Yeah. So, I don't care
about everybody out on the street. I'm
talking about you and you. Okay. So, I'm
I'm waiting for your theory about how
it's okay. I'm going to do it because I
like it. Yeah. Because we want to. I
choose to sit in my room and smoke
marijuana. Do you guys see what you're
doing to us? The marijuana isn't what
makes you my house. That usually is
because you invade his privacy and break
his door down or enter his room to get
what you want. I He's still asleep and
he's not a morning guy. He's like me.
You know, I don't want to be hassled or
talked to a lot the second I climb out
of bed. Let me get my bearings here
because I'm just no country boy and I I
don't move as fast as everybody else
here.
We're talking about the
fact that he's not a morning person,
right? And he should respect that. And
let me talk let me let me be sure I got
it down right here because what actually
happened that you boil down to now you
need to know he's not a morning person
is that you got up that morning and you
wanted some dope and you didn't have any
and it was in his room. So you go
banging on the door and break the door
down to get in and then you knock his
teeth out because of that. But that's
not how it goes. He's just not mourning
people. You're right about that.
Well, you we we put everything together.
It doesn't happen like that. My bong was
out in the cold shed that I didn't want
to walk out to. I had my own marijuana,
so I walked in his room and grabbed it.
Oh, well that quietly. Okay. Well, that
explains it. I didn't knock his door
down. And I did not knock, you know. So
you had no choice but to go get his off
the shelf.
Okay. Well, now I get it.
So you knock his teeth out. Yeah. It
didn't happen that way. Um let's see.
When we when I got my teeth knocked out
that morning, let's see. I I went in his
bedroom or No, I had already been
punched. I already been punched because
he told me he was going to knock me the
out. So I told him to do it. Okay. And
then he did it. He punched me in the
face and I made fun of him. Hang on a
second. Hang on a second. Now, you may
not respect their house, but you will
respect mine. And do not use that
language in front of my audience. You
understand? You want to try me? That's
the easy way to do it. You don't
disrespect these
people. You got it. I got it. All we're
going to take a break. Teresa says the
twins refuse to go to counseling. Dan
says he isn't good at punishing. So,
we're going to find about all the
mistakes the parents may be making, and
I'm going to show you how to make sure
you're not setting yourself up to wind
up right here in this circumstance.
I've got Drew in the act more than once
in my house. Last year, I was having sex
on their bed and he comes walking down
the hall. The door was open. I came home
and Drew and his girlfriend were
actually in my bed going at it. Didn't
even hear him come in. I told him to get
up, get all the sheets and blankets off
the bed, and get him in the washer. Now,
well, that was Dan talking about the
time he caught his teenage son in the
master bedroom with a girl. He and his
wife, Teresa, say, "These kids are just
out of control. They don't know what to
do. I'm here with all of them, twins,
Drew and Dallas." Why his bed? Um
because I had a bunk bed at the time and
I really I couldn't, you know, I didn't
like to hit my back on the metal
bars and she didn't like to either.
Okay. Why do you object to your brother
having friends? I don't like the kid he
hangs out with. And the kid starts
coming over every single day, staying
the night every single day, eating our
food for lunch, breakfast, dinner. And
it's okay because he drives Dallas
around a little bit. Does he like your
friends? Um, Dallas, I don't have
friends. Why do you not have friends?
I don't know. I don't like to go hang
out with people. You do, too. You're
overwhelming for your friends. And you
want friends, and you want him to be
your best friend. That's the problem.
I want him. I know you want him. He
doesn't want you. Do you not? That's why
counseling. Do you not like your
brother?
I like my brother. It's your anger,
Drew, that gets him. Oh, please, mother.
Please. I yell at him when he's calling
me. He eggs me on. I'm sorry. I have bad
mouth. Yes.
You know, I don't have anger problems. I
let it out when I need to or when I when
it's I feel it's it's an expression.
It's not an emotion for me. It's an
expression. I show that I'm angry
because he's he's made it that way for
me. How he does that to me. He's hurt
you. Yeah. He makes me shake and freak
out
like how much anger he makes me have. I
can't control it. He's like, he's the
ticking time bomb with his attitude.
What is it like? Um, I don't know.
Instantly come to my room. Hey, smoke me
out right now. I got to go to work.
Smoke me out right now. It's like, no,
I'm not going to smoke you out. If you
want to smoke, get your own stuff, you
know? And then, and then if since I said
no, then he's going to start throwing a
flip. Like, fine, you're never smoking
my stuff. You're never touching this
again. You know, I don't know. And it,
you know, I'm not. So, you're fighting
over drugs. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes
smoking pot doesn't bring me down at
all. I mean, I I'm moving on. I I've got
my job in school. I've never missed a
credit.
3.5 or above student since I've been in
elementary school. You know, big deal. I
smoke a little pot. Don't bug me about
it. It's on my own
time. Leave me alone. Why are you
crying?
I'm not proud of being a pot smoker. I
don't want all my friends to watch this
TV show and see me crying and talking
about how much spot I smoke. I'm not
proud of it. Why do you do it? Cuz I
like it. I might not be proud of it, but
you know, that's why I try not to do it
around some people, you know.
I don't know. I wouldn't be up here
smoking. You know, I didn't bring stuff
with me in California. How about you?
What? I just feel
hurt being here talking about our
problems.
I like to walk past my problems and just
ignore them like they're not there.
Do you care at all what
impact your choices and behaviors are
having on your parents? Do you care at
all? No, I don't feel my choices have an
impact on them unless maybe I hit a
fence like this guy did or something
that may cost him money. Me smoking pot
and not getting caught by the law or
anything that doesn't affect them. I'm
talking about the fact that they are so
stressed out to the point that they just
want to run away that it's eating them
alive. The house is chaotic. Would you
agree the house is chaotic? Yeah, it's
the screaming and yelling, not the
violence. I don't before him hitting me.
When was the last time that happened? I
don't know. Yeah, I couldn't tell you.
We're the same age. He looks like me.
Have has the same friends as me. You
live with You live with yourself. But
this is this is like Tell me you
wouldn't hate that.
No, I I I do not want to live with Dr.
Phil. I
All right, we're going to take a break.
Next. Whenever you have one member of
family who's out of control, they impact
everybody. They affect all the other
members of the family.
I can't be treated this way anymore. I
don't know how much longer my wife can
take it. I cannot have my house wrecked
any longer. I seem to have lost control
of my house and I need help getting it
back.
Well, we're talking with Dan and Teresa
who say they've just lost control of
their 16-year-old twins, Drew and
Dallas. And you guys say we just do what
we want to do because we want to do it
and it's nobody's business but ours,
right? Mhm. You know, you can go to jail
for illegal drugs, right? Yeah, but I
plan on quitting that one day. I mean, I
may do it now, but I'm not in jail, am
I? I'm on Dr. Phil. Yeah. I need you to
quit now. All right. I've got a timeline
of the twins behavior because you say
this stuff just happens ever so often.
But in 2006, you vandalized an empty
house. Mhm. Okay. So, you were how old
at that time? I was in sixth grade. No.
Sixth and seventh grade. It was a
neighbor's house, right? And he he made
you mad. That neighbor whitewashed me.
And you know what? He moved and you know
what? I thought that was payback. So you
went and vandalized his house. Yeah.
See, you say that like Yes, of course I
did. I didn't like him. So I went and
destroyed I know it was wrong. I know it
was wrong and it was I don't go out with
graffiti anymore. It's a crime. Yeah. Do
I do it anymore? No. I don't know. Yeah.
When was the last time? 2007. Drew
breaks his hand fighting a kid at camp,
right? Kid punched me in the face. I
warned him if he if he did it again, I'd
beat his ass and he did it again. So 08,
you you guys start smoking pot in '08,
right? So it's been three, four years or
was it before that? 08's when we first
started and then we quit for two years
until 9th grade summer. 2010, Dan
catches Drew having sex in his bed. June
11, Dallas charged with reckless driving
and hit and run. You left the scene.
Yeah. Why? Um I mean it was my first
wreck. I didn't I didn't know what to
do. I just left. I mean, it was wrong,
but you know, next time I won't. So, you
lose your license and there's $10,000 in
fees and damages. Yeah. You know, I'm I
know. I know. I put them out of some
money for now. You know, they're getting
it back slowly. So, you destroyed the
fender on the car. And then in August of
11, you back into a moving car. $2,700
in damages. Then you break your hand
punching Dallas. That's the second time
you broke your hand. Yeah. No, you
didn't break your hand punching me. Yes.
No, you didn't. Yeah, I did. I had to
have pins put in Dallas. Maybe. No,
Dallas. I punched you in the back of the
head when you were on the ground and I
had pins put in my hand. Surgery. That's
obviously a broken hand. All right,
then. Then all right. Yeah, then you
broke your hand. Well, don't get in a
fight about it now. Then September 11,
Dallas and Drew get high from illegal
mushrooms. Drew, you have to go to the
hospital, right? New Year's Eve, 2011,
Drew gets driven home by someone who
didn't even have a driver's license.
January, Dallas knocks out a boy in gym
class. Yeah. So then you've broken down
his bedroom door twice, right? Yeah. And
then you got hit by a truck. Yeah. And
then you're admitted to the hospital for
alcohol poisoning. I went to the
hospital because I got hit by a truck.
No. No, that's not. You were
unresponsive. They took me to shallow
breathing. Dallas, you were shallow
breathing. It was shallow breathing
because I got hit by a truck. No. I was
walking home. I was completely fine that
night. I might I might have killed a
fist and had too much alcohol. But did I
get alcohol poisoning? No.
You did. Am I ever going to drink that
much again? No. But are you ever going
to drink again? Yeah. We'll see. You
just told me you were fine. I said we'll
see. You said you may have killed a
fifth. Yeah, I I killed a fifth of
vodka. Yes. 151 proof. And how much does
it weigh? 130. No, actually it wasn't
151 proof. It was 80 proof. Well, I'm
just saying
Dan and I were gone to a funeral and
while we were gone, Drew and Dallas ate
an overdose of
hallucinogenic mushrooms. He was
completely gone. My heart rate dropped
to like 41 beats per second or
something. I'm I'm holding him, shake
his face, get him looking at eye
contact. He's Dan and I drove 7 hours
back home straight to the hospital. We
found Drew in the hospital bed.
Well, that was Drew in Dallas talking
about the night Drew went to the
hospital after taking illegal drugs.
These were mushrooms. Now, their
parents, Dan and Teresa, say they're
actually afraid to live in the same
house at this point because the twins
are so violent and out of control that
they've actually thought about just
running away. Do Do you all get that all
of this affects your your family? And I,
you know, I've got I wanted to show you
something here. And I
I've you know, you guys think I you just
do what you want to do cuz you want to
do it. And you think that's just me.
That's just me. I'm just out here and
that's just me. But what you don't
understand is your relationship with
each other. Then two of you are
together. But then when you two start
fighting, it creates absolute
chaos in the house. Every member of the
house is is affected. Everybody's
moving. This one affects this one. This
one affects this one. This one affects
this one. And what you get is absolute
chaos. And that's what your house is
like, right? Yes. And you two think,
well, no, it's just us. We can get out
here and just do what we want to do. But
that's just simply not right. Everybody
affects everybody
else. And you wind up with chaos, which
is exactly what you've got here. Nobody
in a family can move without affecting
the other people in the
family. Everything interacts. Do you all
get what I'm saying? Oh yes. And you
enable these kids. I mean both of you
allow them to smoke pot. You have made
the decision that that's okay. You make
empty threats. You you say yourself
you're not good at it. You're not good
at punishing. You threaten to take the
keys and the cell phone, but you never
do. They know you don't. I have, but it
gets worse with people yelling
and pissed off and we get I don't know.
I get tired of listening to it. And so
you cave it. I'll cave. I cave cuz
someone's going to get hurt and I'm
going to spend the whole night at the
hospital again. I work. I don't have
time to spend at the dentist and the
hospitals. Hey, they're your kids. I
don't know what to do. It has to stop.
They think it doesn't have any effect on
you. This just no problem. They're fine.
and they do what they want to do. It's
their life. They do it. Do y'all have
y'all ever heard the word empathy? We
went over the definition of that in
health like a couple weeks ago. In
health a couple weeks ago. Empathy is
like a feeling of you can feel what
someone else is feeling or something
like that. Isn't it that's close? It
means you have the
ability, the
sensitivity, the maturity to say I can
understand and relate to how they feel.
And it means if your mother is
frantic and just so overroought and
upset because of whatever it might be.
If you were empathetic with her, you
could understand how she
felt. And with that comes a measure of
caring that you care what the impact is
on your mother or your father. If you
had empathy for your
brother, you would know that there are
certain things that really hurt him. I
have empath empathy for everybody. I
know what hurts and and so if you but if
you did unless you're just trying to be
mean and hurtful. That's exactly what it
is. Then you wouldn't do things that
would would cause pain in somebody that
you love and care about. Yeah. I do it
because he's hurt me. Oh, come I don't
know giving him back. Yeah. Yeah. So,
that's a very reactive mode. That's not
a very mature mode. You know, a a mature
mode might be to sit down and have a
conversation where you said, "Look, when
you do this, it it really hurts me. So,
I'm going to ask you not to do that. And
if there are things that I do that hurt
you, then I want you to tell me. And
we're going to try to be more mature and
grow in this relationship." So it
doesn't get to the point where we're so
frustrated, so angry that we just, you
know, just want to knock the door down
or want to hit each other or call each
other names. And one thing we know is
that your brains aren't through growing
yet. They'll grow until you're 25. And
the last part of it that grows is the
part that helps you predict the
consequences of your actions. And you
there are certain things you can't see
which is why you have to rely on your
parents to do that. If you knew what I
knew about smoking as much dope as
you're smoking at your age, you would
probably throw up right now. Well, I
because it changes the neurology in your
brain. And I know you don't believe
that. Yeah, I know. But I have a
bachelor's, master's, and PhD.
And I spent an awful lot of time on
brain and central nervous system and I
do know that and I do read the research.
I do know the studies and you're just
wrong. Yeah. You know, it's just I'll be
happy to. I am wrong. Big deal. I'm
sorry. What' you say? Said I am wrong.
Big deal. Well, it is a big deal. See,
this is this is where the part comes in
where it's hard for you to understand
the consequences of your choices. You
say big deal. It isn't a big deal to you
right now, but it can be a big deal to
you later when you go,
"Wow, I I wish I hadn't done some of the
things that I've done." We're all in
that situation at some point or another.
You just hope that somebody's there to
contain you and and move you forward.
Well, I'm back with Teresa, Dan, Drew,
and Dallas, and I'm I'm really curious.
Do you think you have any responsibility
in the fact that this family is chaotic?
Um, no, I don't. He points to my anger
problems. So, it's just if we could calm
him down. Yeah. I think I think if he
didn't flip out about every little
thing, there'd be nothing wrong with us.
But using a little thing, you guys want
to do an experiment with me? Yeah. Okay.
I want you guys to stand right here and
face each other. Stand right here.
You're here. You're good. You're right
here. Want you face each other. Okay.
Now, I want you to look each other in
the eye and don't look away. And Drew, I
want you to tell your brother what you
say to yourself after he has called you
names and pushed you away. I want you to
tell him what you think and feel. It
hurts me.
I don't like it at all and I want it to
stop.
Tell him how it hurts you.
First kid to ever punch me in the face
made that name up and I don't like it.
Makes me think of
that. Dallas, look at him. Is that what
you want him to feel? I mean, do you
want him to go say, "Okay, I remember
now that kid bullied me and hurt me, and
now my brother's doing it." I mean, is
that is that your goal? Is that what you
want him to feel? Um, when I say, "Yeah,
that's how I want him to feel." Mhm. Cuz
I think he deserves it. What you mean
when I say it?
How do you want him to feel about
himself overall? I think he should feel
good about himself.
Be proud of yourself.
You ever done anything to him you're
sorry for? You ever sorry for hurting
his feelings? No.
Just don't care. Cuz at the time he
deserves it.
Um I don't feel I hurt his feelings. I
feel he hurt heard himself. Doesn't
matter what other people think about
you.
I know.
So why do you let the name bug you? It
doesn't bug me. It hurts me on the
inside. And there's nothing I can do
about it. The subject, I don't know how
many times I've displayed it to you. The
subject hurts me.
[Music]
Do you care that this is painful for
him? Why would I care?
Because he's experiencing pain when he
talks about it. I'm I'm experiencing
pain. I didn't ask about you. I asked
you about him. Oh,
yeah.
Um I don't know. Do you wish he was
happy and self-confident instead
of vulnerable and and painful? Yeah. I
wish he was confident about himself and
wasn't so jealous of my friends. Doesn't
matter how many friends I have and how
many friends you have. I'm not jealous
of your friends. It pisses me off when
people tell me that cuz I'm not. Okay. I
have my
own. I don't only have one friend. I
have one friend that I enjoy to go over
to his house. The rest of them I hate. I
don't like people.
So you disrespect my friends. I don't
like them. So they disrespect me in my
own household. They your attitude, how
you treat me, they think they can.
Well, you know, sometimes when I got my
friends in my room out, it doesn't
matter if I stay out.
I'm still the pe your piece of brother.
Yeah.
Well, because you know why you are?
Because you're throwing a fit the whole
time my friends are over. No, I'm not.
Yeah, you are
jealous. True. You're jealous. I'm not
jealous. You want Dallas to
yourself. You do. You do. I don't want
his friend staying the night every night
cuz there's no need. You want to be with
him all the time. No, I'd like to see my
brother alone every once in a while.
Okay, I'm getting ready to send you guys
off. Do you have any questions for me?
Um, like to get your autograph after the
show. Get your autograph after.
AJ, if you would take these two for me,
please. Let them spend some time
together.
You have any questions for me? Can you
help them?
No, I I can't I I can't help them. Can
you help us? I can help this family.
Yeah. But the the problem is not them.
And real real seriously, I want y'all to
hear what I'm saying now. Um, it's not
too late for these boys. They're both
intelligent
and they're both
articulate and they're both damaged.
Drew is in a lot of pain and it
expresses in anger, but it's just below
the surface and he wants more than
anything to be accepted by his brother.
But his
brother is kind of moving away from him
because he finds his brother to be kind
of needy. Yes. And he has kind of a cool
and aloof way of dealing with
things. Um, you know, are you sorry when
you say things that you know hurt your
brother? Yeah.
Yeah. He's being honest. He's just
telling you that at that point I'm being
honest. The biggest problem those boys
have got is you.
And I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be ugly
or rude. The time for you to have
intervened with these boys and made
certain that you got them to respect
authority and respect boundaries and
respect
themselves was when they were three,
four, and five years old. And two things
need to happen. I I think they are on
the cusp of serious problems in their
lives. And I what I would do is I would
take the opportunity to put both of them
in separate schools somewhere away from
the two of you and away from each other
at this point. I would put them in a
residential therapeutic school at this
point.
And while they were
gone, I would work the two of you so
hard on redefining your definition of
parenting and boundaries and, you know,
setting a a an environment for these
kids to return to that you would do as
much work as they did while they were
gone. You have allowed this to advance
to the point that it is now beyond the
ability to fix in the home. Mhm. They've
got to go outside the home and they're
very likely to resist that and I'm
willing to make that available to you,
but the parents have to be out of the
loop. That's the only way that it that
it works. They need to be in a highly
structured controlled environment. If
not, I would predict both of them are
going to wind up in prison. Yes. Because
they have no respect for boundaries.
They have no respect for authorities.
And this is our gift to your family. But
you you have to do the work while
they're gone. When they get there, the
success rate is incredibly high. And
when they're gone, you got to figure out
how we're going to have to completely
redefine this. We're more than happy to
do that. Dr. Bill, do you have a story
or a question for me? Click the link in
the description and tell me what in the
world is going on.
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