All language subtitles for Acting Good s04e03 Grouse Lake Grouse Break.eng

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Original subtitles

Hey,�Rose.

Yeah?

I�have�this�friend-

Gonna�stop�you�right�there

because�you're�doing�that�thing

where�you�say�it's your�friend's�question

when,�really,�it's�yours.

Am�not.

Okay.�What�is�this�question

your�totally�real friend�wants�to�ask?

Well,�my�real�friend�wants to�know

what�age�is�a�good�age for�a�baby�to�get�tattooed?

What?!�What? What�did�you�do?

Nothing!�I�told�you! It�was�my�friend!

(sighing) Oh,�you're�lucky,�Paul.

Don't�you�ever,�ever�ask�me again�about�baby�tattoos.

So,�I�should�tell�my�friend

he�should�wait until�his�baby's�18,�then.

Get�out.

(baby�cooing)

Ro�said�it's�not�a�good�idea to�get�your�baby�tatted�up

till�he's�at�least 18�years�old.

(baby�cooing)

Friend:�I�wish�she�would�have told�me�that�sooner.

Paul:�Jesus�fucking�Christ!

(baby�cooing)

Maybe�put�some�ice�on�that!

?�Yes,�I�can�love�you,�baby�?

?�All�night�long�?

Roger:�This�is�Laughing�Stick in�the�Morning.

Band�Councillor�Rose is�putting�together

a�team�of�volunteers to�represent�Grouse�Lake

at�the�Annual�Indigenous Firefighter�Games.

Mm.�I�saw�a�few�of�them�earlier,

and�we're�gonna�need a�team�of�firefighters

to�put�out�these�firefighters because�they're�smokin'.

Mm!�While�I�cool�off,

here's�Carrie�and the�Crotch�Crickets�with

"the�March�of�the�Hornballs".

Rose: Congratulations.

You�are�all�here�because you�were�hand-selected�by�me.

You�are�the�strongest,

bravest,�fiercest, most�physically�gifted�specimens

that�Grouse�Lake�has�to�offer.

(breathing�heavily) Oh,�Rose,�I'm�so�sorry�I'm�late.

I�tried�to�catch a�ride�from�you�this�morning,

but�you�drove�off�so�fast.

-�What�are�you�doing�here? -�Paul:�What�do�you�mean?

I'm�on�the�team.�Speaking�of,

I�didn't�know�about�this little�early�morning�meeting.

Can�we�talk�over-�over�here?

Yeah,�yeah. We�probably�don't�wanna�announce

that�I'm�team�captain in�front�of�these�guys.

(chuckling) Okay,�how�do�I�say�this?

Just�tell�them�that�they're all�good�firefighters,

but�your�b'eb�is�the�best.

Hm.�Do�you�know�what? I�should�tell�them.

-�Shows�good�leadership. -�No.�No.

All�right,�everybody, let's�huddle�in.

Or�you�guys�can just�stand�there.

Basically,�what�Rose is�afraid�to�tell�you,

because�of�'nepotism,' is�that�I'm�team�captain.

I�thought�I�was�team�captain.

B'eb,�what�are�we�gonna�do if�he�has�to�fight�a�fire?

He's�gonna�tell�it�to�lose weight�or�his�knees�will�buckle?

This�can't�be�your�guy.

Chickadee:�Four�seconds�left. No�timeouts.

Jordan's�got�the�flu.

Game�over.

No�way,�you�totally�fouled�me.

As�if.

Okay,�my�turn.

If�I�make�this�shot, we�live�happily�ever�after.

Oh,�yeah? Well,�what�if�you�miss?

We�live�happily�ever�after.

I�like�those�odds.

(laughing)

We�should�clean�this�up.

Why?�I'll�know�where they�are�for�later.

Oh,�crap.�What�time�is�it?

Time�for�more cheese-ball�ball?

I�was�supposed�to�go�live. Stupid�cheese-ball�ball.

Oh,�um,�babe, you're�in�the�shot.

Well,�where�am�I supposed�to�go?

Just�to�the�left.

Here?

Serena�whispering: Hey,�whisperheads.

Sorry,�I'm�a�little late�today.

I�got�caught�up�playing cheese-ball�ball.

(regular�voice:)�Sorry,�babe.

Uh,�chat�says�that�you're still�in�the�shot.

Chat�says�much�better.

Chickadee: Oh,�fuck�off.

(crunching)

Hilda: Good�morning,�Lips.

Or�seeing�as�you�speak�Pig... (oinking)

Not�now,�Auntie. I'm�here�to�see�Chief�Deedee.

Oh,�tough�luck,�Bacon�Bits.

She's�in�a�meeting.

Well,�when�you�see�her, give�her�these.

Fuck's�all�this,�then?

I�ruined�Leon's community�garden

and�I�need�to�be�reprimanded.

You�stomped�on�some�plants

and�phoned�in�a�false�bomb threat,�that's�light�work.

I�crossed�the�line,�Hilda.

I�know�prison�guards more�crooked�than�you.

Whoa.�That's�loaded with�fresh�Copper�Tops.

I'm�suspending�myself... indefinitely.

Ho'leh.

Ya,�ya,�ya,�ya,�ya,�ya,�ya!

Wassa-ga-ma...

-�Babe... -�What?

Are�you�okay?

Yeah.�I'm�just�doing my�vocal�warmups.

Oh,�man,�you�know, you're�pretty�loud

for�someone�who whispers�for�a�living.

Thanks.

So,�do�these�yellings�happen, like,�all�the�time

or�does�that,�like, cover�it�for�the�year?

Like�a�couple�times�a�day,

depending.

Depending�on�what? If�you're�trying�to�break�glass?

Well,�I�can�do�it�somewhere�else if�it's�a�problem.

But,�uh,�speaking�of�problems,

could�you,�uh, clean�up�your�mess?

Mess? That's�my�floordrobe.

It's�where�I�keep�everything.

Look,�look.�There's�that cheese-ball�from�earlier...

(crunching) ...right�where�I�left�it.

(crunching)

Mm.�Who's�a�redhead?

Literal�ick.

So�the�key�to�any good�fire�department

is�a�good�firefighter�calendar,

and�here�to�take the�photo�is�Roger,

who�claims�to�be�a�professional photographer�all�of�a�sudden.

All�proceeds go�towards�travel�expenses

for�your�trip�to�Winnipeg.

Okay,�everyone, take�your�shirts�off,

and�then�I'll�get�started oiling�you�up.

Oof.

Uh,�Roger?

-�Huh? -�Professionalism?

Oh,�right.

Everybody,�take�their shirts�off,�except�Paul.

Actually,�maybe...

layer�up. You're�kind�of�killing�the�vibe.

Rose: Everybody�keep�their�shirts�on.

I�can't�believe I�just�said�that.

Okay,�gather�around.

Paul,�could�you�step a�little�to�the�right?

How�about�here?

Maybe�just�a�little�more.

Little�more?

Little�more.

Yes.

Roger: Say�cheese!

(door�opening)

(door�closing)

Hey,�look! A�piggy�in�a�blanket.

Jeez,�Lips,

it�stinks�like�solitary confinement�in�here.

Here. It's�a�recipe�I�got�from�Stoney.

Careful.�There's�a hacksaw�blade�in�there.

Bad�boys�don't deserve�fresh�bread.

(sighing) Come�on,�Lips.

It's�no�fun�with�you moping�around.

Arrest�me,�would�you?

I-I�just�broke into�your�house.

Without�the�law,�who�am�I?

We're-�We're�like Batman�and�the�Joker.

Fine,�then.

(door�closing)

(video�game�beeping)

Tavis:�Man, we�keep�getting�third-party'd

by�these�sweaty�scrubs.

Just�do�quick�play, no�role�queue.

Hey�guys, could�you�save�the�game

and�do�another�sesh�tomorrow?

After�all,�it�is�like�9�p.m.

Didn't�know�we�were in�an�Elder's�lodge.

Ho'leh,�your�old�lady's just�a�real�old�lady.

Oh,�uh...

(clearing�throat) Hey,�hey,�guys,

let's-�let's�pack�this�up.

(Tavis�sighing)

(door�closing)

Thanks�for�defending�me.

I�was�gonna�say�something, but�then,�they�just�took�off.

You�know�what?

I'm�gonna�track�'em�down at�one�of�their�houses

and�give�them�a piece�of�my�mind.

And,�um... (clearing�throat)

...it-�it�might�take�a�while, so�don't�wait�up.

I'm�just- I'm�just�so�mad�right�now.

Paul:�B'eb!

Shush! I�just�got�PJ�to�sleep.

What�was�with�all�that�backing out�of�the�picture�stuff?

I'm�starting�to�think

that�you�don't�want�me on�the�team�anymore.

(scoffing) No,�that's�not�true.

I�can�handle�it.

Being�a�father�has�put everything�into�perspective.

I'm�way�more�mature�now.

Okay,�then,

you're�not�on the�firefighting�team.

What�the�fuck?!

PJ,�wake�up.

You�gotta�hear�what your�mom�just�said�to�me.

I�just�got�him�to�sleep.

Well,�you�should have�thought�of�that

before�you�broke both�our�hearts.

(sighing) Oh�my�God.

I�can't�just pick�my�own�boyfriend.

It�looks�bad.

Oh,�you�hear�that,�PJ?

I'm�off�the�team because�"it�looks�bad".

(PJ�fussing,�crying)

Nice�going. Now�I�got�two�crying�babies.

-�(PJ�fussing,�crying) -�Don't-

Where�you�going, new�fish?

I'm�here�to�see Councillor�Rose.

Rose,�you�got�a�visitor.

Conjugal�visit,�hey?

B'eb,�is�that�you?

Who�is�this�b'eb�you�speak�of?

I�am�a�concerned�citizen,

and�I'm�here�to�make�an�official complaint�to�Chief�and�Council.

Rose:�Is�this�about the�firefighting�team?

Because�that�wasn't�personal.

Oh,�yeah?

Yeah,�you're�just terribly�out�of�shape.

That�sounds�personal.

Okay,�then, you're�amazingly�out�of�shape.

That�sounds�very�personal.

(sighing) Look,�Paul,

I�really,�really�want�to�win,

and�these�guys are�our�best�shot.

We'll�see�about�that

'cause�I'm�going�to�go and�find�my�own�team,

and�then�later�today, we'll�face�off,

and�then�the�winner's�team

gets�to�go�to�the�most wonderful�place�in�the�world...

Winnipeg.

All�right.�Bring�it�on.

Oh,�it's�on.

Oh,�b'eb,�don't�forget,

later�today,�for�lunch,

Stephen�Harper�made the�most�amazing�stew.

Rose: Hey,�hey,�hey.

Concerned�citizens get�handshakes.

Paul: Mm.

Ah,�psych! (laughing)

Hey.�So,�I�was�going to�go�to�Yeah-mans�later.

They're�doing�20%�off�used�hams. You�want�one?

You�want�to�watch a�movie�later?

Crave�has�this�documentary�on the�rise�and�fall�of�canned�ham.

Nothing?

Those�are�some pretty�good�ham�jokes.

Are�you�giving�me the�silent�treatment?

All�right,�fine,�then. Two�can�play�the�silent�game.

All�right,�it's�on.

No�talking, no�sounds,�no�nothing.

Roger: Welcome�to�the�warm-up�event

for�the�Indigenous Firefighter�Games.

And�if�you're�like�me,

you�got�here�incredibly�early to�watch.

In�a�surprise�twist,�Paul�put together�a�team�of�his�own

and�the�demonstration�is actually�a�competition.

You're�playing with�fire,�Paul.

Yeah,�that's�the�plan.

Oh,�I'm�also�going to�need�a�ride�home�later,�baby.

-�Yeah,�of�course. -�Thanks,�b'eb.

Let�the�games�begin!

(audience�cheering)

(cheering)

(crunching�quietly)

(crunching�quietly)

(sipping�quietly)

(clinking�softly)

(knocking)

Agnes:�Chickadee,�you�there?

Chickadee,�it's�Kookoo, let�me�in.

I�want�to�give�you�$100 and�something�called

a�"PS5�Pro".

All�you�need�to�do

is�give�me�a�sign that�you're�in�there,

anything.

One�little�knock and�it's�all�yours.

Okay,�then.

(Whistle�blowing)

(audience�cheering,�chattering)

Rose:�Yeah!

(audience�cheering,�chattering)

(straining)

(straining) Paul:�Come�on!

(groaning)

(chuckling)

Whoo!

(audience�cheering,�chattering)

(audience�chattering)

Aah!

Oh! Oh,�my�right�foot!

Oh,�my�lucky�foot!

My�lucky�right�foot!

(knocking)

(knocking)

(thudding)

Nobody�move!

I'm�gonna�steal all�your�valuables.

Help�yourself.

Unless�somebody can�arrest�me.

If�I�think�of�anyone, I'll�let�you�know.

For�fuck's�sakes,�Lips, this�is�a�break�and�enter!

That's�nice.

Okay,�then.

(gasping) What�about�this?

Does�that...�fire�you�up?

No,�not�really.

Okay,�what�about�loitering?

Will�you�arrest�me for...�hanging�out?

Loitering?

That's�an�offense punishable�by...

Stop�it,�Auntie.

Ooh,�looks�like�I�found a�pulse.

(gasping) Oops.

I�did�a�littering!

That's�it.

That's�a�violation�of�the Environment�Act,�Section�2.7.

But�I�thought�you weren't�a�cop.

I'm�not...

but�I'm�making a�citizen's�arrest.

Come�with�me.

(gasping) You�got�me,�copper.

Just�don't�send�me�back to�Stony�Mountain.

?

(landing�softly)

Yes!

Ha!�I�win.

-�Serena:�Shit. -�In�your�face,�sucker.

Real�mature,�Chickadee.

You're�just�cheesed because�I�out-quieted

the�quietest�person�ever.

Why�don't�you�just grease�yourself�up

and�slither�out�the�window like�you�always�do?

That�was�only,�like... three�times.

Go�eat�cheese-balls off�the�floor.

Well,�I�don't�really like�ASMR.

You�so�do.

I�am�just�so�relaxed right�now.

Jar'd,�jar'd, bannock�and�lard.

I�know�you�are,�but�what�am�I?

Takes�one�to�know�one.

So,�so,�suck�my�toe all�the�way�to�Standing�Buffalo.

-�(gasping) -�Chickadee:�Oh�shit.

What�did�you�just�say�to�me?

I'm�sorry. I-I�didn't�really�mean�that�one.

Yes,�you�did.

(door�slamming)

(sighing)

This�is�it,�the�final�event.

So�far,�Rose's�team has�been�beautiful,

absolutely�gorgeous, just�pummelling�the�ugly�team.

Ahh...

Each�team�has�to�carry�a�bucket without�losing�any�water

and�use�it�to�hit�the�target.

The�winner�shoots the�target�down�first.

The�loser,�Paul's�team.

Ah.

Roger: Let's�get�this�over�with.

(gun�firing)

(audience�cheering)

(audience�cheering)

And�the�Hots�beat�the�Nots!

(audience�cheering)

-�(cheering) -�Yeah!

(cheering)

(audience�cheering)

Hey�there,�b'eb. Or�is�it�concerned�citizen�Paul?

It's�your�b'eb.

Sorry�we�beat�you�guys�so�badly.

-�It's�fine. -�It's�just�that...

I�can't�have my�b'eb�fighting�fires;

it's�dangerous, and�you're�a�dad�now.

Yeah,�I�guess�it�would�be�pretty hard�to�be�a�cool,�kick-ass�dad

and�fight�fires at�the�same�time.

And�there's�no�shame�in�losing to�Grouse�Lake's�finest.

-�(fire�whooshing) -�Woman:�Fire!

Fire.

A�ridiculously�small�fire.

Rose: Fire�team,

you�know�what�to�do!

-�(crowd�screaming) -�Save�yourselves!

Save�me!

Come�back�here,�you�cowards!

Stand�back,�b'eb. It's�fok'n�hero�time.

Losers,�assemble!

(heroic�music�playing)

You�got�this.

B'eb,�it's�too�dangerous.

If�I�don't�make�it�out�alive, tell�PJ�I�loved�him.

Just�go�already, the�wieners�are�gonna�burn.

(sizzling)

Fire,�you're�fucking�out!

You're�my�hero.

(Paul�grunts)

Does�this�mean�I�get to�come�to�Winnipeg�now?

Hell�no,�we're�still gonna�send�the�hotties.

The�important�thing is�that�I�love�you.

Uh,�counsellors get�handshakes.

(chuckling)

Do�you�think�we�could salvage�any�hot�dogs?

Chickadee: There�you�are.

Look,�I'm�really�sorry

I�told�you�to�suck�my�toe�all the�way�to�Standing�Buffalo.

It's�fine.

No,�it�wasn't. It�was�way�too�far.

Standing�Buffalo's, like,�miles�away.

I'm�sorry�for�that�whole�thing I�said�about�bannock�and�lard.

I�don't�know�where that�came�from.

I�deserved�it.

Is�it�true�that you�don't�like�ASMR?

I�like�it. I�don't�love�it.

Are�we�breaking�up?

I�thought this�was�just�a�fight.

Seriously?�Me�too.

I�guess�it�was�bound to�happen.

You're�a�Bittern and�I'm�a�Buttern.

Yeah,�I�guess�it�would�be weird�if�we�didn't�fight.

It's�in�our�blood.

Aww,�our�first�fight.

To�many�more.

Yo!

Are�we�fuckin' doing�this�or�what?

Get�the�fuck�out�of�here.

Both:�Yup.

Well,�look�who's�back.

Thanks,�Auntie.

I�know�we�have�our�differences,

but�it�means�a�lot�to�me to�know�that�you�care.

Hey,�keep�it�down.�You�crazy?

I�can't�be�seen talking�to�the�fuzz.

Can�I�at�least�get�my�tactical illumination�devices�back?

No�can�do,�Lips.

Looks�like�you�actually are�suspended�now.

What�do�you�mean?

Well,�you�said�you suspended�yourself,

but�as�far�as Chief�Deedee�is�concerned,

you�skipped�work and�didn't�tell�anyone.

Really?

You�gotta�have�rules,�Lips.

(snorting�like�a�pig)

?�Wake�up�now�?

?�Indian�Agent�man�?

?�Wake�up�now�?

?�Things�are�out�of�hand�?

?�Wake�up�now�?

?�Indian�Agent�man�?

?�Wake�up�now�?

?�Things�are�out�of�hand�?

(Indigenous�singing)

?

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