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1
00:00:01,486 --> 00:00:03,920
And action.
2
00:00:03,988 --> 00:00:08,391
Hey, what's Scruffy MacKenzie have
that we don't have?
3
00:00:08,459 --> 00:00:11,951
Face it, guys.
You're not the party animal he is.
4
00:00:13,865 --> 00:00:17,733
So, when you party hard, make surethat Scruffy MacKenzie...
5
00:00:17,802 --> 00:00:19,929
and Juggs Lite are included.
6
00:00:20,004 --> 00:00:22,063
Right, Scruffy?
7
00:00:22,140 --> 00:00:26,236
All right, that's a wrap.
Where the hell did Scruffy go?
8
00:00:27,578 --> 00:00:29,569
- All right, you guys, take five.
- I beJohn Brown.
9
00:00:29,647 --> 00:00:32,343
Duke, here we are. This is your commercial here.
You make this, boy...
10
00:00:32,417 --> 00:00:36,012
You make this big break here, you'll have
all the straight bitches running after you.
11
00:00:36,087 --> 00:00:38,783
Uh, excuse me, sir.
I think the audition's over.
12
00:00:38,856 --> 00:00:41,825
Oh, it can't be over,
'cause you ain't seen Duke yet.
13
00:00:41,893 --> 00:00:43,827
- What in the...
- Yeah, lookee here.
14
00:00:43,895 --> 00:00:47,023
Duke is perfect for the part.
I'll tell you what. He can do impressions too.
15
00:00:47,098 --> 00:00:50,590
Yeah, watch him do Bruce Lee.
[Karate Yells]
16
00:00:50,668 --> 00:00:53,660
Actually, I don't know if you notice,
but I think your dog is, uh...
17
00:00:53,738 --> 00:00:55,933
- You Fathead Davis, ain't you?
- No, no.
18
00:00:56,007 --> 00:00:58,532
Well, I beJohn Brown
running like a glue factory.
19
00:00:58,609 --> 00:01:01,169
Look at you, boy. I remember
when you wasn't no bigger than this...
20
00:01:01,245 --> 00:01:02,940
and you was a Cub Scout
out there in the woods...
21
00:01:03,014 --> 00:01:04,948
and a wolf bit your head
clean off.
22
00:01:05,016 --> 00:01:07,780
- Boy, look at ya.
- Okay, okay, let's just do this.
23
00:01:07,852 --> 00:01:10,343
- Everybody, one last time.
- There you go, Fatty.
24
00:01:10,421 --> 00:01:12,855
- Hey, my name's not Fatty.
- What you wanna do?
25
00:01:12,924 --> 00:01:15,324
All right now, come on, everybody.
Let's take it from the top.
26
00:01:15,393 --> 00:01:18,328
I tell you what, Duke,
now this your chance here.
27
00:01:18,396 --> 00:01:22,127
As soon as you make this money, you can get
that cleft in your chin like thatJackson boy.
28
00:01:22,200 --> 00:01:25,169
And... action.
29
00:01:25,236 --> 00:01:28,694
Man, what's Scruffy MacKenzie have
that we don't have?
30
00:01:28,773 --> 00:01:32,209
Face it, guys.
You're not the party animal he is.
31
00:01:34,912 --> 00:01:37,881
You was close, Duke.
Just next time open your mouth up.
32
00:01:37,949 --> 00:01:39,883
Why do we love Scruffy MacKenzie?
33
00:01:39,951 --> 00:01:42,146
Because he never
gives us the runaround.
34
00:01:42,220 --> 00:01:44,211
There you go, Duke, run around there.
There you go, run around.
35
00:01:44,288 --> 00:01:46,279
There you go, Duke.
Fall into that runnin'.
36
00:01:46,357 --> 00:01:48,723
Look at that, there you go.
You got you a white girl there, snowflake.
37
00:01:48,793 --> 00:01:50,693
Look at that, boy.
38
00:01:50,762 --> 00:01:52,696
So, when you party hard,
make sure that...
39
00:01:52,764 --> 00:01:55,665
- Get him off of me!
- I'm sorry about that...
40
00:01:55,733 --> 00:01:58,293
- but you know Duke is a leg man, pumpin' fit.
- Eww!
41
00:01:58,369 --> 00:02:00,803
All right.
Somebody call my agent.
42
00:02:00,872 --> 00:02:03,067
Hey, look at that, Duke. I think you
done won there. Look at that.
43
00:02:03,141 --> 00:02:06,770
You got the commercial, son. As soon as you
make enough money, we can move from here.
44
00:02:06,844 --> 00:02:08,778
I love you like you was my own.
45
00:02:08,846 --> 00:02:10,905
You don't run like you used to, Duke.
You all right?
46
00:02:13,451 --> 00:02:14,440
- How you livin'?
- What?
47
00:02:14,519 --> 00:02:15,611
- How you livin'?
- What?
48
00:02:15,686 --> 00:02:18,052
- How you livin'?
- ♪ In living color♪
49
00:02:18,122 --> 00:02:22,252
- ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
- ♪ In living color♪
50
00:02:22,326 --> 00:02:26,592
- ♪ Anything you want is up to you ♪
- ♪ In living color♪
51
00:02:26,664 --> 00:02:30,464
- ♪ You for me and me for you ♪
- ♪ In living color♪
52
00:02:30,535 --> 00:02:34,801
- ♪ You can be anything you wanna be ♪
- ♪ In living color♪
53
00:02:34,872 --> 00:02:37,500
- ♪ Let's take a trip and sip on a dream ♪
- ♪ Yeah ♪
54
00:02:37,575 --> 00:02:39,736
- ♪ Glide with the guide on a funky scene ♪
- ♪ All right ♪
55
00:02:39,811 --> 00:02:42,279
♪ Here comes another oneof those funky, funny mo'money shows ♪
56
00:02:42,346 --> 00:02:43,870
♪ A cast for laughsand talented roles ♪
57
00:02:43,948 --> 00:02:46,075
♪ And sisters with twistersfor you been lookin'listener♪
58
00:02:46,150 --> 00:02:48,118
♪ It seems you don't believeso you can believe what I convince ya ♪
59
00:02:48,186 --> 00:02:50,211
♪ Some booty to your short and thoughtWe'll make it snappy ♪
60
00:02:50,288 --> 00:02:52,256
♪ With jokes and pokesat folks to keep you happy ♪
61
00:02:52,323 --> 00:02:54,518
♪ No need to holdyour remote control ♪
62
00:02:54,592 --> 00:02:56,560
♪ ChillThis show's got soul ♪
63
00:02:56,627 --> 00:02:58,720
♪ All aboard, all aboardThe train never troubles ♪
64
00:02:58,796 --> 00:03:00,161
♪ You'd better snuggle upcouple up ♪
65
00:03:00,231 --> 00:03:01,926
- ♪ On the double-dub-double ♪
- ♪ Yeah ♪
66
00:03:01,999 --> 00:03:05,230
♪ It's hard to believe but some ofthe best things in life are free ♪
67
00:03:05,303 --> 00:03:07,328
♪ So, fellas, grab your girlTell her that you love her♪
68
00:03:07,405 --> 00:03:09,771
♪ 'Cause that's the way you're livin'when you're livin'in living color♪
69
00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:14,244
♪ Go, go, go, gogo, go, go, go ♪
70
00:03:14,312 --> 00:03:15,574
♪ Go, go ♪♪
71
00:03:20,985 --> 00:03:23,681
If it pleases you,
I prepare your dinner, Lo Lee.
72
00:03:23,754 --> 00:03:27,315
- Thank you. Now die!
- [Groans]
73
00:03:27,391 --> 00:03:29,382
Take this away.
It depresses me.
74
00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:40,498
Lo Lee, the village
is not yours to toy with.
75
00:03:40,571 --> 00:03:44,905
The Great One will stop
your evil plan.
76
00:03:44,976 --> 00:03:46,910
[Groans]
77
00:03:50,548 --> 00:03:52,516
[Male Announcer]Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon.
78
00:03:52,583 --> 00:03:57,282
Now you can see world championfemale bodybuilder Vera De Milo in...
79
00:03:57,355 --> 00:03:59,653
Breasts of Fury!
80
00:04:02,426 --> 00:04:05,224
Hey, why don't you guys
pick on someone...
81
00:04:05,296 --> 00:04:08,527
with your own testosterone level?
82
00:04:08,599 --> 00:04:13,161
Are you the Great One
who has been sent to avenge us?
83
00:04:13,237 --> 00:04:18,004
No, but I'm on steroids.
So when I get cramps, look out.
84
00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:21,110
There is no hope.
85
00:04:25,750 --> 00:04:30,312
That's it, Chang.
No pain, no gain.
86
00:04:30,388 --> 00:04:33,221
Dok, take care of this.
It bores me.
87
00:04:33,291 --> 00:04:35,521
Lo Lee.
88
00:04:38,062 --> 00:04:40,792
You evil overlord.
89
00:04:40,865 --> 00:04:44,926
- I come bearing bitter fruit.
- I don't fear the...
90
00:04:45,002 --> 00:04:48,733
What is that smell?
91
00:04:48,806 --> 00:04:51,798
You'll have to excuse me,
I'm in heat.
92
00:04:51,876 --> 00:04:55,869
[Whinnies]
93
00:04:55,947 --> 00:04:58,142
Get her!
94
00:05:00,084 --> 00:05:02,018
[Bones Crack]
95
00:05:02,086 --> 00:05:04,054
You broke my arm!
96
00:05:04,121 --> 00:05:06,681
So learn how to swim
in a circle.
97
00:05:15,366 --> 00:05:18,665
Nice moves,
but you're no Patrick Swayze.
98
00:05:18,736 --> 00:05:21,466
[Laughs]
You fight well, genetic freak.
99
00:05:21,539 --> 00:05:26,738
But let's see how you do
against Domo!
100
00:05:29,947 --> 00:05:33,542
[Yells]
101
00:05:35,553 --> 00:05:39,421
[Yells]
102
00:05:39,490 --> 00:05:41,321
Oh.
103
00:05:41,392 --> 00:05:44,623
Sorry, must be ninja-vitis.
104
00:05:48,933 --> 00:05:52,061
[Groans]
105
00:05:52,136 --> 00:05:57,438
Is that tempura in your belly,
or are you just happy sashimi?
106
00:05:59,677 --> 00:06:03,010
There's only one way
to take down this big boy.
107
00:06:05,516 --> 00:06:10,977
Look up there. It's Rodan,
and he's fighting with some other creature.
108
00:06:12,256 --> 00:06:15,248
- [Blows]
- [Giggles]
109
00:06:15,326 --> 00:06:18,489
[Yells]
Oh, no!
110
00:06:18,562 --> 00:06:22,123
I have been defeated
by poison pit.
111
00:06:24,235 --> 00:06:27,830
I've turned bigger stomachs
than yours, mister.
112
00:06:27,905 --> 00:06:30,738
Hey, Lo Lee, not so fast.
113
00:06:33,911 --> 00:06:36,903
My breasts are quite beautiful,
aren't they?
114
00:06:36,981 --> 00:06:40,246
And, oh, so distracting.
115
00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:45,016
[Yells, Groans]
116
00:06:45,089 --> 00:06:47,023
That's what you get for peeking.
117
00:06:53,197 --> 00:06:55,131
What's a girl to do?
118
00:06:55,199 --> 00:06:59,101
[Announcer]Vera De Milo has Breasts of Fury!
119
00:07:04,909 --> 00:07:08,242
Now, Luther, you wasting your time
calling here every day.
120
00:07:08,312 --> 00:07:10,280
I ain't gonna hire you back.
121
00:07:10,347 --> 00:07:14,147
I said plain as day,
"Give Mama a glass of juice"...
122
00:07:14,218 --> 00:07:17,654
not "Give Mama's ass a goose."
123
00:07:17,722 --> 00:07:20,748
Besides, your brother
is fittin' in just great.
124
00:07:20,825 --> 00:07:23,350
Chitlin plate.
Pick it up.
125
00:07:23,427 --> 00:07:25,861
Hey, lady, can I get
a steak knife?
126
00:07:25,930 --> 00:07:28,421
Uh, yeah.
Just let me finish up with it.
127
00:07:28,499 --> 00:07:31,127
I'm down to my last corn.
128
00:07:31,202 --> 00:07:34,729
Oh, lucky, lucky.
That one just popped right off.
129
00:07:34,805 --> 00:07:36,568
- Pop-Tart, pick it up.
- [Bell Dings]
130
00:07:36,640 --> 00:07:38,733
Barney Rubble goes both ways!
131
00:07:40,811 --> 00:07:43,006
I beJohn Brown.
Look it here.
132
00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:46,208
Oh, Dr. Turner, come on in here.
133
00:07:46,283 --> 00:07:50,117
Oh, lucky day.
Mack Daddy in the house.
134
00:07:50,187 --> 00:07:53,122
Hold on, Mama.
I thought we agreed I get the next man.
135
00:07:53,190 --> 00:07:57,650
- Oh!
- Well, what say you get me a special to go.
136
00:07:57,728 --> 00:08:01,687
- Dr. Turner, I've been getting
this pain right here in my side.
- Mm-hmm. Where?
137
00:08:01,766 --> 00:08:03,233
- Uh, lower.
- Land o'goshen.
138
00:08:03,300 --> 00:08:04,858
- Lower.
- I believe you.
139
00:08:04,935 --> 00:08:08,029
If you go any lower,
he's gonna be touchin' your breasts.
140
00:08:08,105 --> 00:08:10,369
Well, anyway, you know
I'm not a real doctor.
141
00:08:10,441 --> 00:08:12,602
Actually, I took
a correspondence course.
142
00:08:12,676 --> 00:08:15,042
Actually, I'm a doctor
in what you call philosophy.
143
00:08:15,112 --> 00:08:20,880
Oh, well then, uh, my "philosophy-an" tubes
ain't doing too well either.
144
00:08:20,951 --> 00:08:24,546
- Ain't got no damn beaver.
Got possum though. Pick it up.
- [Bell Dings]
145
00:08:24,622 --> 00:08:27,614
Francis, I thought we said
this was my customer.
146
00:08:27,691 --> 00:08:30,956
Now don't you remember
your panty hose are in the back stewing.
147
00:08:31,028 --> 00:08:33,895
And by the smell of things,
I'd say they were ready.
148
00:08:33,964 --> 00:08:37,730
- Be right back in a minute.
- Well, get on with your bad self.
149
00:08:37,802 --> 00:08:41,465
I trick-or-treat
with a colostomy bag!
150
00:08:41,539 --> 00:08:44,565
Lookee here at this jukebox.
Boy, it's a shame the jukebox ain't workin'...
151
00:08:44,642 --> 00:08:46,576
'cause if it was,
I'd cut a rug.
152
00:08:46,644 --> 00:08:48,737
Look it there.
153
00:08:48,813 --> 00:08:52,044
Look it, y'all, now you better
ask somebody in this joe.
154
00:08:52,116 --> 00:08:54,380
Hey, lady,
I need some service.
155
00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:57,113
If you could pull yourself
away from Deney Terrio.
156
00:08:57,188 --> 00:09:00,453
- Ain't got no "Niko," got Cheerios. Pick it up.
- [Bell Dings]
157
00:09:00,524 --> 00:09:04,893
Oh, that's right, baby.
Mama promised you some ketchup, right?
158
00:09:04,962 --> 00:09:07,294
Here you go.
159
00:09:07,364 --> 00:09:10,629
- I ordered soup.
- Oh, I'm sorry, baby.
160
00:09:10,701 --> 00:09:13,169
Stop shoutin'.
You're spittin' on me.
161
00:09:13,237 --> 00:09:16,070
Um, Francis, get this man
over here some soup.
162
00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:18,574
Uh, coming right up.
163
00:09:18,642 --> 00:09:23,773
Uh, unfortunately, my panty hose soaked up
all the soup, but there's still a little left.
164
00:09:23,848 --> 00:09:27,181
- Just say when.
- Y-Yeah.
165
00:09:27,251 --> 00:09:30,516
- Let me ask you a question, Doctor.
- Right on, right on.
166
00:09:30,588 --> 00:09:33,250
- Is your wife still dead?
- Yeah, she's still dead.
167
00:09:33,324 --> 00:09:36,418
But just 'cause the hen died,
don't mean the rooster don't stop peckin'.
168
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:39,519
Look it here. Look it here.
I'm a mite thirsty though.
169
00:09:39,597 --> 00:09:41,758
My throat needs something.
I need something for my throat.
170
00:09:41,832 --> 00:09:45,996
Oh, I'll get you somethin'.
Let go of this, sucker. Get...
171
00:09:46,070 --> 00:09:50,439
Here's some buttermilk for you.
It's good for your "prostrate."
172
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:53,908
- I ain't seen no leap of faith,
I got a fruit plate. Pick it up.
- [Bell Dings]
173
00:09:53,978 --> 00:09:56,538
Don't worry about my prostate though.
They took all that out.
174
00:09:56,614 --> 00:09:59,981
Took all of that out, except the kitchen sink,
but the pipe's still workin'.
175
00:10:00,050 --> 00:10:04,350
Look it that.
Yonder go.
176
00:10:04,421 --> 00:10:07,185
- If I was a ho, let it go. Pick it up.
- [Bell Rings]
177
00:10:07,258 --> 00:10:11,285
- I'll get it.
- Uh, no, I wanna snake his main line.
178
00:10:11,362 --> 00:10:14,160
- Well, too bad, 'cause he's mine.
- No, he's not, he's mine.
179
00:10:14,231 --> 00:10:16,165
- He's mine!
- He's mine!
180
00:10:16,233 --> 00:10:19,225
He's mine.
Come on, baby.
181
00:10:19,303 --> 00:10:22,238
All right, Alice. Let's go.
I can't believe I got me one.
182
00:10:22,306 --> 00:10:25,469
Boy, look it there. I beJohn Brown.
I got me a snowflake in the house.
183
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:32,113
Aw, man, there's
a cat collar in this stew.
184
00:10:32,182 --> 00:10:34,582
Oh, Francis, take down the sign.
185
00:10:34,652 --> 00:10:37,951
- We done found Fluffy.
- Lucky, lucky day.
186
00:10:38,022 --> 00:10:40,752
My bunion winked at me today!
187
00:10:40,824 --> 00:10:42,849
- I ain't gay.
- [Bell Dings]
188
00:10:52,851 --> 00:10:55,012
All right, Granny, hands up in the air, baby.
This is a stickup.
189
00:10:55,086 --> 00:10:58,214
Hey, ho. You thought
I was reading that magazine...
190
00:10:58,289 --> 00:11:00,348
but in for real,
I was casing the joint.
191
00:11:00,425 --> 00:11:02,791
- Wasn't I, baby?
- That's right, baby. You've been cased.
192
00:11:02,861 --> 00:11:05,261
- How does it feel to be cased?
- [Both Laughing]
193
00:11:05,330 --> 00:11:08,959
- [Singsongy] I cased. That was cased.
- Yeah, it was a case.
194
00:11:09,033 --> 00:11:10,967
Would you please hurry it up?
195
00:11:11,035 --> 00:11:13,970
In 15 minutes, Amy Fisher on Ice
is comin' on.
196
00:11:14,038 --> 00:11:17,098
Hey, honey, don't act like you don't know
who we are. We're Bunny and Clive.
197
00:11:17,175 --> 00:11:19,871
[Both]
It's on! It's on!
198
00:11:19,944 --> 00:11:22,777
- Yeah, we got a slow gig too.
- That's right.
199
00:11:22,847 --> 00:11:25,611
[Singsongy]
We take our...
200
00:11:25,683 --> 00:11:30,245
Well, anyway, you hold your hands up in the air,
because this store is ours. Now get it?
201
00:11:30,321 --> 00:11:32,289
Now, how you gonna rob the place
when you can't even see?
202
00:11:32,357 --> 00:11:36,350
- I can see.
- How come you're pointing the gun
at the hot dog machine?
203
00:11:36,428 --> 00:11:38,692
- I knew that.
- Move to your right, baby.
204
00:11:38,763 --> 00:11:40,697
- Aah, gotcha!
- Fruit roll-ups.
205
00:11:40,765 --> 00:11:42,699
- Move to your left, baby.
- Gotcha in the scope, baby.
206
00:11:42,767 --> 00:11:44,701
- Corn flakes.
- Oh!
207
00:11:44,769 --> 00:11:46,930
- Yeah!
- Now you got me.
208
00:11:47,005 --> 00:11:50,805
Now you just sit back and suffer,
while we pillage.
209
00:11:50,875 --> 00:11:53,969
That's right, we'll pillage.
We're gonna go pillage.
210
00:11:54,045 --> 00:11:58,573
We're gonna go pillage. Hey, how does it feel
to have your newspapers pillaged?
211
00:11:58,650 --> 00:12:00,811
Those newspapers are free.
212
00:12:00,885 --> 00:12:03,786
You can't tell me what's free.
Nobody can tell me what's free.
213
00:12:03,855 --> 00:12:06,289
Hey, yeah, nobody tells us
nothing about free.
214
00:12:06,357 --> 00:12:08,382
Matter of fact, I'm gonna pay for them.
There. How you like that?
215
00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:11,588
That's right, pay it, baby.
How's it feel to be paid?
216
00:12:11,663 --> 00:12:16,999
♪ Paid, paid
Whoo, paid, paid ♪
217
00:12:17,068 --> 00:12:20,526
Hey, lady, where do you keep
those strawberry douches?
218
00:12:20,605 --> 00:12:24,666
As a matter of fact, I'm gonna take me
some of these girlie magazines like Playpen.
219
00:12:24,742 --> 00:12:26,972
Mystique.
Oh, boy, look at this.
220
00:12:27,045 --> 00:12:30,981
- What do you want those for, honey?
- Don't start this again.
221
00:12:31,049 --> 00:12:34,917
Don't I satisfy you?
Why do you gotta read all this stuff for?
222
00:12:34,986 --> 00:12:37,352
Baby, I don't read these.
I just look at the pictures.
223
00:12:37,422 --> 00:12:39,356
Oh, okay.
224
00:12:39,424 --> 00:12:41,358
You two ain't very bright, are you?
225
00:12:41,426 --> 00:12:44,054
Ain't very bright? Look at the headlines, huh?
Read the headlines.
226
00:12:44,128 --> 00:12:48,360
That's right. America's Most Wanted.
Read it and you weep.
227
00:12:48,433 --> 00:12:50,663
Yeah.
228
00:12:50,735 --> 00:12:54,831
"Mini-mart robbed.
Hot dog machine shot six times."
229
00:12:54,906 --> 00:12:57,204
You told me I shot a clerk.
230
00:12:57,275 --> 00:12:59,607
I didn't wanna mess up
your confidence...
231
00:12:59,677 --> 00:13:04,546
- 'cause you're so sensitive about your bad eyes.
- I don't have bad eyes.
232
00:13:04,616 --> 00:13:06,550
- Over here, baby.
- All right.
233
00:13:06,618 --> 00:13:09,519
Gimme this.
Now you read it for her. Yeah.
234
00:13:09,587 --> 00:13:13,182
"Acne kitty...
235
00:13:13,258 --> 00:13:16,318
foo-fo, t-t-tech"...
236
00:13:16,394 --> 00:13:18,692
Oh, baby, I can't read.
I'm sorry.
237
00:13:18,763 --> 00:13:20,958
That's all right, baby.
We'll get you Hooked on Phonics, baby.
238
00:13:21,032 --> 00:13:23,762
- Don't worry about it.
- I tried, but I can't do it.
239
00:13:23,835 --> 00:13:26,133
You know,
I've been robbed a lot...
240
00:13:26,204 --> 00:13:29,037
and you two are the worst criminals
I have ever seen.
241
00:13:29,107 --> 00:13:31,041
Uh-huh, well,
I'll tell you what.
242
00:13:31,109 --> 00:13:32,804
- Hey, Evelyn.
- [Gun Clatters]
243
00:13:32,877 --> 00:13:35,607
Super Big Gulp,
and don't be stingy with the ice.
244
00:13:35,680 --> 00:13:39,912
Oh, no, baby, the gig is up.
The gig is up.
245
00:13:39,984 --> 00:13:43,476
- What does the sign say, baby?
- Cops!
246
00:13:43,555 --> 00:13:45,921
Cops. I knew it would have to come down
to this someday. I'll tell you what.
247
00:13:45,990 --> 00:13:47,924
- Before we leave, you gotta
write this message down...
- Yes?
248
00:13:47,992 --> 00:13:50,654
- All right.
- For the press.
249
00:13:50,728 --> 00:13:53,492
- Recite this. Dictation.
- All right.
250
00:13:53,565 --> 00:13:56,432
- We're rebels too fast to live, yet...
- Yes.
251
00:13:56,501 --> 00:13:58,526
- Too young to die.
- Yeah.
252
00:13:58,603 --> 00:14:00,537
- We're Bunny and Clive.
- That's right.
253
00:14:00,605 --> 00:14:02,630
Now read it back to me.
254
00:14:02,707 --> 00:14:07,667
"Spanky rad flim-flee foo fo"...
255
00:14:07,745 --> 00:14:10,213
I can't write neither, baby.
I'm so...
256
00:14:10,281 --> 00:14:13,444
It's all right, baby, because there ain't
a jail that can hold us down.
257
00:14:13,518 --> 00:14:16,146
That's right.
We're Bunny and Clive.
258
00:14:18,456 --> 00:14:21,948
- Here you go. On the house.
- Thanks.
259
00:14:22,026 --> 00:14:24,790
Hey, you two, get outta my car!
260
00:14:27,498 --> 00:14:32,128
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
261
00:14:32,203 --> 00:14:37,266
♪♪ [Man Singing]
262
00:14:47,251 --> 00:14:49,116
♪♪ [Continues]
263
00:15:01,532 --> 00:15:03,693
♪♪ [Continues]
264
00:15:13,811 --> 00:15:16,143
[Male Announcer]Welcome to The Dysfunctional Home Show.
265
00:15:16,214 --> 00:15:19,581
Now here's your hostGrandpa Jack McGee.
266
00:15:24,856 --> 00:15:26,915
Hi.
267
00:15:26,991 --> 00:15:32,759
And welcome to The Dysfunctional Home Show
funeral special.
268
00:15:32,830 --> 00:15:34,764
Won't you join us?
269
00:15:40,505 --> 00:15:46,410
I'm just finishing this casket
for my dear departed mother.
270
00:15:46,477 --> 00:15:49,776
Look what the mortician
did to her.
271
00:15:49,847 --> 00:15:53,180
Pasty, bloated, green.
272
00:15:54,519 --> 00:15:57,352
Just like I remember her.
273
00:15:59,891 --> 00:16:01,984
[Sobbing]
274
00:16:03,061 --> 00:16:05,495
Jack, I'm so sorry.
275
00:16:07,465 --> 00:16:10,628
That's okay.
There, there.
276
00:16:10,702 --> 00:16:15,696
You just gotta think...
think of things the way I do.
277
00:16:15,773 --> 00:16:21,439
She was a good-for-nothing,
sleazy leech on society...
278
00:16:21,512 --> 00:16:24,447
- and we're all better off without her.
- [Gasps]
279
00:16:24,515 --> 00:16:27,075
- Now give me some sugar.
- [Screams]
280
00:16:29,954 --> 00:16:33,481
Oh, you're gonna
make me beg.
281
00:16:34,926 --> 00:16:37,417
Cut the music.
Hey, hey!
282
00:16:44,402 --> 00:16:47,030
Is... Is that a synthesizer?
283
00:16:48,606 --> 00:16:51,074
Is... Is that...
Is it a synthesizer?
284
00:16:52,543 --> 00:16:58,482
Why don't you dedicate a song
to my dear departed mother...
285
00:16:58,549 --> 00:17:02,918
on your... synthesizer?
286
00:17:02,987 --> 00:17:04,921
What do you want me to play?
287
00:17:04,989 --> 00:17:10,120
How about " That Old Gray Mare,
She Ain't What She Used To Be."
288
00:17:11,295 --> 00:17:13,923
♪♪ [Playing]
289
00:17:13,998 --> 00:17:17,525
♪ That old gray mare
she ain't what she used to be ♪
290
00:17:17,602 --> 00:17:20,867
♪ She ain't what she used to be
Ain't what she used to be ♪
291
00:17:20,938 --> 00:17:24,339
♪ The old gray mare
she ain't what she used to be ♪
292
00:17:24,408 --> 00:17:28,367
♪ Twenty years ago ♪♪
293
00:17:28,446 --> 00:17:33,349
Ladies and gentlemen, would anyone
care to say some kind words...
294
00:17:33,417 --> 00:17:35,510
about the dearly departed?
295
00:17:35,586 --> 00:17:39,215
♪♪ [Organ Continues]
296
00:17:39,290 --> 00:17:41,815
Anybody?
297
00:17:41,893 --> 00:17:43,827
Anyone?
298
00:17:43,895 --> 00:17:45,328
Hello?
299
00:17:45,396 --> 00:17:47,330
- All right.
- Okay.
300
00:17:48,733 --> 00:17:51,497
Tyrell, say something nice
about Grandma.
301
00:17:56,440 --> 00:18:00,934
Uh, yeah.
Uh, I never really liked her.
302
00:18:01,012 --> 00:18:05,949
But now that she's dead,
I guess she's okay.
303
00:18:09,086 --> 00:18:14,820
That was beautiful
and sensitive and sweet...
304
00:18:14,892 --> 00:18:17,918
you black bastard.
305
00:18:23,801 --> 00:18:26,167
Can't you see there are
people mourning here?
306
00:18:26,237 --> 00:18:29,365
I mean, look at all the people
that Grandma touched.
307
00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:31,840
Rick, the bartender.
308
00:18:31,909 --> 00:18:34,537
Dan from the Liquor Barn.
309
00:18:34,612 --> 00:18:37,877
MaryJo fromthe Suicide Prevention Line.
310
00:18:37,949 --> 00:18:40,713
That's MaryJo.
311
00:18:40,785 --> 00:18:45,051
Well, way to go.
Nice job, Mary.
312
00:18:46,257 --> 00:18:49,351
What, came to see
one of your graduates?
313
00:18:51,863 --> 00:18:55,230
Why, I'm gonna miss ya, Mom.
314
00:18:55,299 --> 00:18:57,893
You gave me everything.
315
00:18:57,969 --> 00:19:00,597
You gave me life.
316
00:19:00,671 --> 00:19:04,232
You gave me love.
317
00:19:04,308 --> 00:19:06,333
You gave me this watch.
318
00:19:07,879 --> 00:19:12,316
I can't believe you took Grandma's watch.
We get it!
319
00:19:12,383 --> 00:19:14,681
Yeah, you already took
all the money.
320
00:19:14,752 --> 00:19:17,084
Hey...
321
00:19:17,154 --> 00:19:20,123
that money
has sentimental value.
322
00:19:22,226 --> 00:19:24,956
- Look, there's a diamond earring!
- Yeah, don't she have
some gold fillings or something?
323
00:19:25,029 --> 00:19:27,520
- Somebody got some pliers?
- I got a church key.
324
00:19:27,598 --> 00:19:30,533
Ah, hold on.
Gimme some leverage.
325
00:19:32,503 --> 00:19:35,233
Come on, you selfish bitch!
326
00:19:38,309 --> 00:19:40,800
I got it!
I got it!
327
00:19:40,878 --> 00:19:43,438
How could you do that?
328
00:19:43,514 --> 00:19:45,846
It's all in the wrist, son.
329
00:19:45,917 --> 00:19:48,886
- [Yells]
- [All Scream]
330
00:19:48,953 --> 00:19:52,912
Wait. Make it another double...
331
00:19:52,990 --> 00:19:56,926
and this time
put some liquor in it.
332
00:19:56,994 --> 00:20:00,691
What the hell...
What's going on here?
333
00:20:00,765 --> 00:20:02,790
Not another funeral.
334
00:20:02,867 --> 00:20:08,032
Oh, Jack, this is
the third one this year.
335
00:20:08,105 --> 00:20:12,804
Oh, no, she's alive!
336
00:20:12,877 --> 00:20:15,778
What the hell
is wrong with you?
337
00:20:15,846 --> 00:20:20,215
Can't a person slip
into an alcoholic coma...
338
00:20:20,284 --> 00:20:23,947
without being buried alive?
339
00:20:24,021 --> 00:20:27,787
You are a loser!
340
00:20:27,858 --> 00:20:31,191
Can't even tell if I'm dead.
341
00:20:31,262 --> 00:20:34,698
Well, yes, we'll see about that.
342
00:20:34,765 --> 00:20:38,633
- Somebody get me the lid.
- Somebody help me.
343
00:20:38,703 --> 00:20:42,070
Go into the light.
Go into the light.
344
00:20:42,139 --> 00:20:45,506
[Male Announcer]This has been The Dysfunctional Home Show.
345
00:20:48,579 --> 00:20:52,606
All right, now let's get hyped for Delicious
Vinyl recording artist The Far Side...
346
00:20:52,683 --> 00:20:55,174
singing a single
rising to the top with a bullet...
347
00:20:55,252 --> 00:20:58,380
"Passing Me By," yeah!
348
00:20:58,456 --> 00:21:03,826
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
349
00:21:03,894 --> 00:21:08,194
- Check one, two.
- Check it out, uh.
350
00:21:08,265 --> 00:21:10,358
One, two, check it
Check it out.
351
00:21:10,434 --> 00:21:15,167
♪♪ [Rapping]
352
00:21:40,264 --> 00:21:42,892
♪♪ [Continues]
353
00:21:53,511 --> 00:21:57,811
♪♪ [Continues]
354
00:22:35,719 --> 00:22:38,279
♪♪ [Ends]
29553
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