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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,553 --> 00:00:04,418 [Man] Clarence Thomas, you werejust elected... 2 00:00:04,489 --> 00:00:06,480 the newestjustice of the Supreme Court. 3 00:00:06,557 --> 00:00:08,525 What are you gonna do now? 4 00:00:08,593 --> 00:00:12,586 I'm going to Girlie World. [Chuckles] 5 00:00:14,599 --> 00:00:17,432 Who put this hair in my cola? 6 00:00:24,942 --> 00:00:27,604 [No Audible Dialogue] 7 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:37,654 Come on! 8 00:00:45,163 --> 00:00:50,362 [Man] Girlie World. Where dreams come true. 9 00:00:50,435 --> 00:00:51,697 - How you livin'? - What? 10 00:00:51,769 --> 00:00:52,793 - How you livin'? - What? 11 00:00:52,870 --> 00:00:55,361 - How you livin'? - ♪ In living color♪ 12 00:00:57,442 --> 00:01:01,276 - ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 13 00:01:01,346 --> 00:01:05,680 - ♪ Anything you want is up to you ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 14 00:01:05,750 --> 00:01:09,413 - ♪ You for me and me for you ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 15 00:01:09,487 --> 00:01:14,584 - ♪ You can be anything you wanna be ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 16 00:01:14,659 --> 00:01:16,650 - ♪ Let's take a trip and sip on a dream ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪ 17 00:01:16,728 --> 00:01:18,889 - ♪ Glide with the guide on a funky scene ♪ - ♪ All right ♪ 18 00:01:18,963 --> 00:01:21,295 ♪ Here comes another one of those funky, funny mo'money shows ♪ 19 00:01:21,366 --> 00:01:23,334 ♪ A cast for laughs and talented roles ♪ 20 00:01:23,401 --> 00:01:25,198 ♪ And sisters with twisters for you been lookin', listener♪ 21 00:01:25,269 --> 00:01:27,430 ♪ It seems you don't believe so you can believe what I convince ya ♪ 22 00:01:27,505 --> 00:01:29,700 ♪ Some booty to your short and thought We'll make it snappy ♪ 23 00:01:29,774 --> 00:01:31,867 ♪ With jokes and pokes at folks to keep you happy ♪ 24 00:01:31,943 --> 00:01:34,104 ♪ No need to hold your remote control ♪ 25 00:01:34,178 --> 00:01:36,009 ♪ Chill This show's got soul ♪ 26 00:01:36,080 --> 00:01:38,071 ♪ All aboard, all aboard The train never troubles ♪ 27 00:01:38,149 --> 00:01:39,673 ♪ You'd better snuggle up couple up ♪ 28 00:01:39,751 --> 00:01:41,412 - ♪ On the double-dub-double ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪ 29 00:01:41,486 --> 00:01:44,649 ♪ It's hard to believe but some of the best things in life are free ♪ 30 00:01:44,722 --> 00:01:46,883 ♪ So, fellas, grab your girl Tell her that you love her♪ 31 00:01:46,958 --> 00:01:49,222 ♪ 'Cause that's the way you're livin' when you're livin'in living color♪ 32 00:01:49,293 --> 00:01:52,524 ♪ Go, go, go, go go, go, go, go ♪ 33 00:01:52,597 --> 00:01:58,433 ♪ Go, go, go, go go, go, go, go ♪ 34 00:01:58,503 --> 00:02:01,939 ♪ Go, go, go, go go, go, go, go ♪ 35 00:02:02,006 --> 00:02:04,236 ♪ Go, go, go ♪ 36 00:02:04,308 --> 00:02:06,799 ♪ Go, go, go, go ♪♪ 37 00:02:11,115 --> 00:02:13,606 Nobody could hit like Willie Mays. 38 00:02:13,684 --> 00:02:17,017 Anybody who don't agree should be shot and spit on. 39 00:02:17,088 --> 00:02:19,921 Hey, no argument from me on that one. 40 00:02:19,991 --> 00:02:22,152 - Hey, baby! - Whoa! 41 00:02:22,226 --> 00:02:24,387 - Will you look at that? - Whoo-hoo! 42 00:02:24,462 --> 00:02:26,054 Oh, there oughta be a law. 43 00:02:26,130 --> 00:02:29,122 Looks like she's got Gary Coleman and Webster up under there. 44 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,134 [Both Laugh] 45 00:02:31,202 --> 00:02:35,536 Uh-oh. Hide the jewels, look who's comin'. 46 00:02:35,606 --> 00:02:39,007 - If it ain't a couple of pretty boys. - Hey, sissies. 47 00:02:39,076 --> 00:02:40,941 - Pantywaists. - Pop-Tarts. 48 00:02:41,012 --> 00:02:45,676 Yeah, they probably hang out where all of those twinkies do, down there on York Street. 49 00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:49,584 Probably drink in that sissy bar on the corner ofThird and York. 50 00:02:49,654 --> 00:02:51,884 - What do they call that place? - The Blue Parrot. 51 00:02:51,956 --> 00:02:56,655 Right. The Blue Parrot. [Laughs] Apple turnovers. 52 00:02:56,727 --> 00:02:58,661 Yeah, I bet they're in there every night. 53 00:02:58,729 --> 00:03:03,132 Sucking down one of them special drinks they make in that place. 54 00:03:03,201 --> 00:03:05,396 - What do they call 'em? - Slow Bun Fizz. 55 00:03:05,470 --> 00:03:08,803 - Right. The Slow Bun Fizz. - Slow Bun Fizz, yeah. 56 00:03:08,873 --> 00:03:11,535 - Cinnamon swirls. - Cream puffs. 57 00:03:11,609 --> 00:03:15,101 Probably can't wait to get to that big jukebox they got in the corner there... 58 00:03:15,179 --> 00:03:19,013 - and play Bette Midler songs. - Or-Or, "It's Raining Men." 59 00:03:19,083 --> 00:03:22,314 - [Both Laughing] - That's G-32. 60 00:03:22,386 --> 00:03:26,550 - G-35. - Oh, yeah. G-35. 61 00:03:26,624 --> 00:03:32,085 Then they all head back into that secret room they got back there. 62 00:03:32,163 --> 00:03:36,224 Oh, yeah, but you can't get in unless you know the password. 63 00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:39,292 [Together] Pop goes the weasel. 64 00:03:39,370 --> 00:03:42,703 [Laughing] 65 00:03:42,773 --> 00:03:46,436 - Peanut butter cups. - Peach cobblers. 66 00:03:48,279 --> 00:03:51,271 And you know they're gonna hit on Todd the bartender. 67 00:03:51,349 --> 00:03:53,510 - Who? - Todd. You know, Todd? 68 00:03:53,584 --> 00:03:58,578 The guy who teases you with those piercing blue eyes... 69 00:04:00,091 --> 00:04:02,582 his pouting, soft lips. 70 00:04:04,595 --> 00:04:09,589 Yeah, with that Tom Selleck mustache that just melts ya dead in your tracks. 71 00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:11,601 [Sighs] 72 00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:19,665 - Weed whackers! - Cheese doodles! 73 00:04:19,744 --> 00:04:22,235 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 74 00:04:22,313 --> 00:04:24,543 Who in the hell you guys yelling at? 75 00:04:24,615 --> 00:04:26,810 Aw, a couple of show tune lovers walked by. 76 00:04:26,884 --> 00:04:29,284 Oh, yeah, like those fruitcakes that hang out at the Blue Parrot. 77 00:04:29,353 --> 00:04:33,346 - Yeah, you know the place? - Yeah, sure. My roommate Todd works there. 78 00:04:33,424 --> 00:04:36,916 [All Talking At Once] 79 00:04:47,939 --> 00:04:51,602 [Nervous Chuckle] Yeah, um, I'm sorry about eating here... 80 00:04:51,676 --> 00:04:55,840 but, I mean, if we're going to that hotel later on, this is all I can afford. 81 00:04:55,913 --> 00:04:59,246 Oh, Bobby, it doesn't matter where we eat, as long as we're together. 82 00:04:59,317 --> 00:05:02,809 - Nothing could ruin this night. - Prince got a hairy booty. 83 00:05:05,089 --> 00:05:09,082 Yo-ho-ho. Welcome to Snack 'N Shack. 84 00:05:12,096 --> 00:05:16,362 Tonight's our new pirate theme. Don't you two look nice. 85 00:05:16,434 --> 00:05:19,699 - Pork fried rice. Pick it up. - Is that a real parrot? 86 00:05:19,770 --> 00:05:22,432 Oh, no, baby. I used to have a real one up there... 87 00:05:22,506 --> 00:05:24,565 but it kept pecking at the bugs in my hair. 88 00:05:24,642 --> 00:05:26,507 Chocolate éclair. Pick it up. 89 00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:29,444 - Uh, maybe we should just go to the hotel now. - No. No. 90 00:05:29,513 --> 00:05:33,506 - We've already waited so long. Let's have a romantic dinner. - You're right. 91 00:05:33,584 --> 00:05:37,281 Ahoy, mateys. Make way for Long John Minimum Wage. 92 00:05:40,958 --> 00:05:44,416 Somehow it's always my turn to swab the deck. 93 00:05:44,495 --> 00:05:48,488 Ain't got no more Wheat Chex. Don't mean no disrespect. What the heck, got chicken necks. 94 00:05:48,566 --> 00:05:52,900 - Pick it up. - Since Mama's babies look so much like my grandchildren... 95 00:05:52,970 --> 00:05:55,632 I'm gonna give you some of Luther's free clam chowder. 96 00:05:55,706 --> 00:05:58,698 Thanks, but, do you have a catch of the day? 97 00:05:58,776 --> 00:06:01,438 Oh, no. We don't have a catch of the day. 98 00:06:01,512 --> 00:06:04,379 But last week, two customers caught hepatitis. 99 00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:08,407 My left titty nipple got an eye on it. 100 00:06:08,486 --> 00:06:11,182 - I can feel those magic fingers now. Let's go. - Oh, Bobby. 101 00:06:11,255 --> 00:06:14,588 Y'all better sit on back down. Mama's gonna spank you. 102 00:06:14,659 --> 00:06:17,992 Sit down. I'll pull your pants and spank you. 103 00:06:18,062 --> 00:06:21,554 Now, what's Mama's little swashbucklers gonna have? 104 00:06:21,632 --> 00:06:24,465 Uh, well, let's try some oysters on the half shell. 105 00:06:24,535 --> 00:06:27,265 - Oysters on the half shell. - Oysters on the half shell. 106 00:06:27,338 --> 00:06:28,999 Whose feet smell? Kick 'em out. 107 00:06:31,175 --> 00:06:35,373 - Why don't y'all try the special, the lobster? - Lobster sounds nice. 108 00:06:35,446 --> 00:06:39,075 Oh, it is nice, baby. We even let you pick it out yourself. 109 00:06:39,150 --> 00:06:41,084 - Don't we, Frances? - Aye, matey. 110 00:06:41,152 --> 00:06:45,816 But don't take the one on my big toe. He's still working on my bunion. 111 00:06:45,890 --> 00:06:47,881 Liver and onions. Pick it up. 112 00:06:47,958 --> 00:06:52,122 Damn, lady. I'd rather eat a two-day-old, moldy taco than eat that. 113 00:06:52,196 --> 00:06:56,257 Oh, bless your heart, baby. How come you didn't just say so? 114 00:06:56,333 --> 00:07:00,997 - Aw, man. - There you go. You want some hot sauce on that? 115 00:07:01,072 --> 00:07:04,667 - Oh, my God. - Cod. Pick it up. 116 00:07:04,742 --> 00:07:07,108 What's this in the chowder? [Gasps] 117 00:07:07,178 --> 00:07:10,011 [Gagging] 118 00:07:10,081 --> 00:07:14,950 Ooh, good googa-mooga. Look like you done found the pirate's treasure. 119 00:07:15,019 --> 00:07:19,217 - Frances. - Lucky day. That's Luther's glass eye. 120 00:07:19,290 --> 00:07:22,657 We ain't got no more peach pie. Hey, what the hell? 121 00:07:22,727 --> 00:07:26,561 Let's go. I am ready to get out of here. Let's go to the hotel now. 122 00:07:26,630 --> 00:07:28,791 I can't. I gotta go home and throw up. 123 00:07:28,866 --> 00:07:31,994 - All right. It's your loss. - Two all-beef patties, special sauce. 124 00:07:32,069 --> 00:07:34,560 I don't know why, but suddenly I'm hungry for McDonald's. 125 00:07:34,638 --> 00:07:36,799 Great, you have it your way, then later I'll have it mine. 126 00:07:36,874 --> 00:07:38,933 I got a boil look just like Elvis. 127 00:07:39,009 --> 00:07:41,500 Who said I can't move my pelvis? 128 00:07:47,318 --> 00:07:49,684 Excuse me, what are your specials? 129 00:07:49,754 --> 00:07:52,917 Today's specials are, uh, meat loaf with mash potatoes and brown gravy. 130 00:07:52,990 --> 00:07:55,151 - Whitefish with tater tots and navy bean soup. - Thanks. 131 00:07:55,226 --> 00:07:57,387 - No problem, hon. - Hey, you have any ketchup? 132 00:07:57,461 --> 00:07:59,793 - Absolutely. - How do I get to the bathroom? 133 00:07:59,864 --> 00:08:03,197 Here's what you wanna do. You go down the hall, past the telephone booth on your right... 134 00:08:03,267 --> 00:08:05,428 - it's on your left-hand side, you can't miss it. - Thanks. 135 00:08:05,503 --> 00:08:09,337 Lizzy, I need a 12-letter Latin phrase for "I came, I saw, I conquered." 136 00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:13,399 Huh. Try "Veni, Vidi, Vici." That oughta work. 137 00:08:15,746 --> 00:08:18,374 Excuse me. What's the proper penance for stealing? 138 00:08:18,449 --> 00:08:21,612 - That's two "Our Fathers" and a "Hail Mary." - [Chuckles] 139 00:08:21,685 --> 00:08:23,414 Hey, Lizzy, here's one. 140 00:08:23,487 --> 00:08:27,150 This man, along with Michael "Wonder Mike" Wright and Guy "Master Gee" O'Brien... 141 00:08:27,224 --> 00:08:29,192 made up the original Sugarhill Gang. 142 00:08:29,260 --> 00:08:32,696 Oh. Who is Henry "Big Bang Hank"Jackson? 143 00:08:32,763 --> 00:08:35,755 - She's right again. - This is impossible. 144 00:08:35,833 --> 00:08:39,894 Aw, give me that. There you go, hon. 145 00:08:39,970 --> 00:08:43,804 - Did you see that? - Lizzy, this physics is driving me crazy. 146 00:08:43,874 --> 00:08:45,967 Do you know what the conservation of energy law is? 147 00:08:46,043 --> 00:08:48,136 What, do I look like a rocket scientist? 148 00:08:48,212 --> 00:08:50,373 - I just figured, you know... - No, I'm just kidding. 149 00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:56,352 Try one half mass times velocity squared equals mass times gravity times height. 150 00:08:56,420 --> 00:08:59,912 How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 151 00:08:59,990 --> 00:09:03,153 As much wood as a woodchuck could if a woodchuck could chuck wood. 152 00:09:03,227 --> 00:09:05,092 - Huh. - When is a horse not a horse? 153 00:09:05,162 --> 00:09:09,121 - When he's the famous Mr. Ed. - Hey, can you do the Running Man? 154 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:12,533 - Absolutely. - [All] Go, Lizzy. Go, Lizzy. 155 00:09:12,603 --> 00:09:15,595 - Go Lizzy. Whoo.! - [Laughs] 156 00:09:15,673 --> 00:09:18,665 All right. I'm thinking of a number between one and 1,000. 157 00:09:18,742 --> 00:09:22,769 - Hey, are those Bugle Boy jeans you're wearing? - [Speaking In Japanese] 158 00:09:22,847 --> 00:09:26,840 I got ya. Okay, I think that's 56. Why, yes, they are. 159 00:09:26,917 --> 00:09:30,284 And, uh... [Continues In Japanese] 160 00:09:30,354 --> 00:09:33,517 All right, everybody. Freeze! 161 00:09:33,591 --> 00:09:35,923 I want you to take all your money, put in on the table... 162 00:09:35,993 --> 00:09:38,120 or I'm gonna bust a cap in this old, white heifer's behind. 163 00:09:38,195 --> 00:09:42,894 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 164 00:09:42,967 --> 00:09:44,867 You're not gonna shoot anybody. 165 00:09:44,935 --> 00:09:48,928 - Bull... - No, you're not going to shoot anybody. 166 00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:53,807 You think I'm kidding? This ain't no joke, baby. 167 00:09:53,878 --> 00:09:55,812 Look at the way his hand is shaking. 168 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:59,213 It's obvious that this is a subconscious attempt to get love from your father. 169 00:09:59,283 --> 00:10:01,444 You were abused as a child. It's as simple as that. 170 00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:03,918 You're a scared little rabbit. You just need a big bear hug. 171 00:10:03,988 --> 00:10:08,322 You wanna hurt us? You're the one who's hurting inside, mister. That's right. 172 00:10:08,392 --> 00:10:11,452 - [Crying] You right. Give me a hug. - All right. 173 00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:14,019 - [All Saying "Ah"] - All right. 174 00:10:14,098 --> 00:10:16,794 Let's all give him a round of applause. 175 00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:19,358 - I'm sorry. - Welcome. 176 00:10:20,738 --> 00:10:23,901 Go in peace. There you go. 177 00:10:23,974 --> 00:10:26,534 What are you so nervous about? It wasn't even a real gun. 178 00:10:26,610 --> 00:10:28,578 - What? - I'm just kidding. 179 00:10:28,646 --> 00:10:32,980 It was a.45 semiautomatic, 14-clip. He could have blown the hell out of all of us. 180 00:10:50,292 --> 00:10:52,624 I'm sorry. 181 00:10:52,695 --> 00:10:56,324 I'm sorry, but the Hebrews for the Homeless night is tomorrow. 182 00:10:56,399 --> 00:10:59,835 - Say what, brother? No, we here for the party. - Yeah! 183 00:10:59,902 --> 00:11:02,234 Oh. Well, in that case, you'll need this. 184 00:11:02,304 --> 00:11:04,966 Hey, man. What the hell kinda hat is this? 185 00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:07,201 Couldn't you afford the brim and the feather? 186 00:11:07,276 --> 00:11:11,770 Oh, now. You know that ain't no hat. That's the chamois for the El Dorado. 187 00:11:11,847 --> 00:11:15,510 Baby, you're always in my corner. Give me some sugar. 188 00:11:15,584 --> 00:11:18,109 - [Loud Kiss] - Come on. We gonna be late. 189 00:11:18,187 --> 00:11:22,521 ♪ Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you ♪ 190 00:11:22,591 --> 00:11:27,255 - ♪ Happy birthday, Reverend Al ♪ - Say, where the reverend at? 191 00:11:27,329 --> 00:11:30,355 Oh, here we go. How y'all doin' tonight? 192 00:11:30,433 --> 00:11:32,594 I'm fine. 193 00:11:32,668 --> 00:11:35,660 All right, everybody put your hands together, get on the good foot. Here we go. 194 00:11:35,738 --> 00:11:39,333 - Excuse me. E-Excuse me. This is a religious ceremony. - [Both] Oh. 195 00:11:39,408 --> 00:11:43,742 ♪ Onward Christian soldiers ♪ 196 00:11:43,813 --> 00:11:48,648 ♪ Moonwalkin' on to the war With the reverend ♪ 197 00:11:48,717 --> 00:11:53,711 Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. I think you made a wrong turn somewhere. 198 00:11:53,789 --> 00:11:57,691 - We did? - Ain't this the Reverend Al Sharpton's birthday party? 199 00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:01,252 No. No. This is Allen Sharpstein's bar mitzvah. 200 00:12:01,330 --> 00:12:05,494 Bar "mister"? Oh, Cephie, I think we done found ourselves a happy hour. 201 00:12:05,568 --> 00:12:10,062 And this man sure know how to throw down. Where the ribs at? 202 00:12:10,139 --> 00:12:13,131 Oh, no. You don't understand. This is a bar mitzvah, not a happy hour. 203 00:12:13,209 --> 00:12:17,202 - It's a Jewish rite of passing. - Oh, theyJewish. 204 00:12:17,279 --> 00:12:20,771 - You should've said something. - Give 'em a little taste of that special song we do. 205 00:12:20,850 --> 00:12:23,250 - We got something special. - Here we go. 206 00:12:23,319 --> 00:12:29,258 ♪ If I were a Jew ♪ 207 00:12:29,325 --> 00:12:32,055 Please! Please, can we get on with the ceremony? 208 00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:36,359 Oh, hey. Wait, now. That ain't one of them things where you snip at the boy's yo-yo, is it? 209 00:12:36,432 --> 00:12:39,162 'Cause you gonna need all you can get, knee-deep, partner. 210 00:12:39,235 --> 00:12:41,703 Oh, my God. What is with you people? 211 00:12:41,770 --> 00:12:44,762 - Now, what the hell they call that, honey? - That's called a circumcision. 212 00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:47,832 - Oh, that's right. - Now, baby, we got something for you. 213 00:12:47,910 --> 00:12:51,243 - Come on over here, son. - Come on. 214 00:12:51,313 --> 00:12:54,373 Let's sing him a little special song, Reesie. 215 00:12:54,450 --> 00:12:59,149 - Here we go. - ♪ Allen had his yo-yo snipped, E-l-E-l-O ♪ 216 00:12:59,221 --> 00:13:00,984 ♪ With a snip-snip here and a snip-snip there ♪ 217 00:13:01,056 --> 00:13:03,889 Listen, please. Stop. Listen. Listen. 218 00:13:03,959 --> 00:13:06,951 Don't you people know any songs that we would like to hear? 219 00:13:07,029 --> 00:13:09,020 What about, uh, "Hava Nagila"? 220 00:13:09,098 --> 00:13:11,191 - "Hava" what? - "Hava" who? 221 00:13:11,267 --> 00:13:13,258 "Hava Nagila." You know... 222 00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:17,328 ♪ Hava nagila, hava nagila ♪ 223 00:13:17,406 --> 00:13:20,898 - Now didn't the Stylistics record that back in '72? - I think so. 224 00:13:20,976 --> 00:13:25,310 - I don't think we know that. Do we, baby? - That never stopped us before. 225 00:13:25,381 --> 00:13:30,876 - Here we go. - [Screaming] 226 00:13:30,953 --> 00:13:35,617 That's it. Now, give 'em a little nagila right on the side where the hot sauce is. 227 00:13:35,691 --> 00:13:37,989 ♪ Nagila ♪ 228 00:13:38,060 --> 00:13:41,052 - ♪♪ [Continues] - Whoo-wee! 229 00:13:41,130 --> 00:13:45,294 Go it on, baby. Go it on, baby. Go it on, baby. 230 00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:48,200 - ♪♪ [Continues] - Go it on, girl! 231 00:13:48,270 --> 00:13:52,764 - Whew! - Baby, you done made my big toe shoot up in my boot. 232 00:13:52,841 --> 00:13:56,402 - Yeah, baby! - Here we go, y'all. 233 00:13:56,478 --> 00:14:01,780 ♪ Hava nagila Have a tortilla ♪ 234 00:14:01,850 --> 00:14:05,286 ♪ Magilla Gorilla Rock, paper or scissors ♪ 235 00:14:05,354 --> 00:14:08,187 ♪ Bobby Bonilla eat at the Sizzler♪ 236 00:14:08,257 --> 00:14:11,624 ♪ Chocolate, vanilla Captain Furillo ♪ 237 00:14:11,694 --> 00:14:13,059 ♪ Hava nagila Hava nagila ♪ 238 00:14:13,128 --> 00:14:17,724 - ♪ Hava nagila Hava nagila ♪ - ♪ Hava ♪ 239 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:20,132 - Where'd they go? - I don't know, baby. 240 00:14:20,202 --> 00:14:22,796 Oh, no. They're gone. 241 00:14:22,871 --> 00:14:27,570 ♪♪ [Dance] 242 00:14:58,607 --> 00:15:03,943 [Man] And now The Adventures of Handi Boy. 243 00:15:08,784 --> 00:15:13,619 - Come on, Clark. Blow out your candles. - I don't want to. 244 00:15:13,689 --> 00:15:18,683 - Oh, what's the matter, Son? - Johnny Spradlin made fun of me again. 245 00:15:18,761 --> 00:15:22,891 - And none of the kids will play with me. - Oh, nonsense. 246 00:15:22,965 --> 00:15:27,026 Yeah? Then why no one came to my party then? 247 00:15:27,102 --> 00:15:31,300 - He's got a point, Martha. - It's time for you to open your present, Son. 248 00:15:31,373 --> 00:15:33,864 - It's very special, dear. - I don't want it. 249 00:15:33,942 --> 00:15:37,173 Come now. It was given to us by the people who sent you here, Son. 250 00:15:37,246 --> 00:15:40,374 They made us promise not to let you open it until your eighth birthday. 251 00:15:41,884 --> 00:15:45,911 You mean you're not my real Mommy and Daddy? 252 00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:50,516 [Chuckling] Not by a long shot. 253 00:15:50,592 --> 00:15:52,184 Just open the box, Clark. 254 00:15:52,261 --> 00:15:57,426 - [Grunts] - Oh, let Mother help you, dear. 255 00:15:57,499 --> 00:16:03,028 [Whirring] 256 00:16:04,406 --> 00:16:06,738 Hello, my son. 257 00:16:06,809 --> 00:16:11,803 It is your eighth birthday and time for you to fulfill your destiny. 258 00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:15,213 - Are you ready? - I guess so. 259 00:16:15,284 --> 00:16:18,117 You were born on the planet Palsy... 260 00:16:18,187 --> 00:16:23,523 andjust before it exploded, we sent you to Earth in a wheelchair. 261 00:16:25,494 --> 00:16:30,488 Even as a baby, you were stronger than the other kids. 262 00:16:30,566 --> 00:16:34,730 Your schoolmates made fun of you because you were different. 263 00:16:34,803 --> 00:16:40,139 Now, my son, it is that difference that will make you great. 264 00:16:40,209 --> 00:16:45,704 I am making you an offer that you can't refuse. 265 00:16:46,381 --> 00:16:52,047 Drink the liquid in the vial and be all you can be, my son. 266 00:16:57,392 --> 00:16:59,986 [Liquid Gurgling] 267 00:17:04,967 --> 00:17:06,901 Very good. 268 00:17:06,969 --> 00:17:12,805 Now, from this moment on, you'll be known as Handi Boy... 269 00:17:12,875 --> 00:17:18,370 defender of the weak and protector of the meek. 270 00:17:18,447 --> 00:17:21,280 And remember, my son... 271 00:17:21,350 --> 00:17:26,686 never underestimate the powers of the handicapped. 272 00:17:26,755 --> 00:17:30,088 Now, get down off the lady's chair, would you? 273 00:17:30,159 --> 00:17:32,491 Yes, sir. 274 00:17:33,595 --> 00:17:36,587 [Together] Happy birthday, Clark. 275 00:17:36,665 --> 00:17:41,466 - Aren't you gonna cut the cake? - No. I gotta go. The world needs me. 276 00:17:43,639 --> 00:17:46,608 Oh. Thanks for everything. 277 00:17:46,675 --> 00:17:49,644 [Together] Good-bye, Son. We'll miss you. 278 00:17:49,711 --> 00:17:53,044 Up, up and away. 279 00:18:06,395 --> 00:18:08,727 [Laughing] Give me those glasses, four eyes. 280 00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:10,788 - Johnny, give me back my glasses. - What are you looking at? 281 00:18:10,866 --> 00:18:13,858 That's not funny, Johnny. Johnny, if l... You're gonna make me fall. 282 00:18:13,936 --> 00:18:16,700 - Excuse me. Let him go. - What? 283 00:18:16,772 --> 00:18:19,741 I said, let the cane go. 284 00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:23,801 - Well, who the heck are you? - I'm Handi Boy. 285 00:18:23,879 --> 00:18:27,007 And I can do anything you can do better. 286 00:18:27,082 --> 00:18:29,642 Oh, yeah? Okay, Handi Gimp, let's race. 287 00:18:29,718 --> 00:18:34,451 - Come on. - On your mark, get set, go! 288 00:18:37,793 --> 00:18:41,752 - [Panting] - What took you so long, slowpoke? 289 00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:44,697 Hey, nobody calls me names, Handi Boy. I'll teach you. 290 00:18:45,868 --> 00:18:49,827 [Crying] Mommy. 291 00:18:49,905 --> 00:18:53,068 Gee, he has a big head. 292 00:18:53,141 --> 00:18:55,803 - Thank you, Handi Boy. - That's okay. 293 00:18:55,878 --> 00:19:01,214 It used to happen to me all the time until I realized that I was special... 294 00:19:01,283 --> 00:19:04,741 - just like you. - Ow! 295 00:19:04,820 --> 00:19:07,983 My glasses. Thanks, Handi Boy. 296 00:19:08,056 --> 00:19:11,583 Let this be a lesson to all of you. 297 00:19:11,660 --> 00:19:17,155 Never underestimate the powers of the handicapped. 298 00:19:20,669 --> 00:19:24,400 Up, up and away. 299 00:19:27,409 --> 00:19:32,403 [Man] Tune in next week for The Adventures of Handi Boy. 300 00:19:38,086 --> 00:19:40,418 All right, thank you. 301 00:19:40,489 --> 00:19:43,481 All right, little man, tell them what they gotta do. 302 00:19:43,558 --> 00:19:46,152 Right there. Tell them what they do. 303 00:19:46,228 --> 00:19:49,129 - All right, you're fired. - Say, bye-bye. Say, bye. 304 00:19:49,197 --> 00:19:52,530 Okay, she took care of it. Next week, y'all. We out. 27196

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