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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,224 --> 00:00:05,988 ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪ 2 00:00:06,994 --> 00:00:08,825 ♪ In living color♪ 3 00:00:10,064 --> 00:00:11,827 - ♪ In living color♪ - ♪ You know what I'm sayin'♪ 4 00:00:11,899 --> 00:00:15,130 ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪ 5 00:00:15,202 --> 00:00:19,195 - ♪ In living color♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 6 00:00:19,273 --> 00:00:21,468 ♪ You can walk on the moon Float like a balloon ♪ 7 00:00:21,542 --> 00:00:24,010 ♪ You see, it's never too late and it's never too soon ♪ 8 00:00:24,078 --> 00:00:27,639 - ♪ Take it from me, it's a'ight to be ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 9 00:00:27,715 --> 00:00:30,149 ♪ And how would you feel knowing prejudice was obsolete ♪ 10 00:00:30,217 --> 00:00:32,276 ♪ And all mankind danced to the exact beat ♪ 11 00:00:32,353 --> 00:00:35,880 - ♪ And at night it was safe to walk down the street ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 12 00:00:35,957 --> 00:00:39,051 ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪ 13 00:00:39,126 --> 00:00:41,117 ♪ In living color♪ 14 00:00:42,496 --> 00:00:44,430 ♪ In living color♪ 15 00:00:44,498 --> 00:00:47,160 ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪ 16 00:00:47,234 --> 00:00:49,702 ♪ In living color♪ 17 00:00:50,838 --> 00:00:52,396 ♪ In living color♪ 18 00:00:52,473 --> 00:00:54,668 ♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪ 19 00:00:54,742 --> 00:00:56,733 ♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪ 20 00:00:56,811 --> 00:00:59,177 ♪ Everybody, everybody everybody, everybody ♪ 21 00:00:59,246 --> 00:01:02,977 - ♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 22 00:01:03,050 --> 00:01:05,348 ♪ What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine ♪ 23 00:01:05,419 --> 00:01:07,580 ♪ In living c-c-color♪ 24 00:01:08,990 --> 00:01:14,018 ♪ You can do what you wanna do in living color♪ 25 00:01:15,896 --> 00:01:17,659 - ♪ In living color♪ - ♪ You know what I'm sayin'♪ 26 00:01:17,732 --> 00:01:19,427 ♪ You can walk on the moon Float like a balloon ♪ 27 00:01:19,500 --> 00:01:21,730 ♪ You see, it's never too late and it's never too soon ♪ 28 00:01:21,802 --> 00:01:25,203 - ♪ Take it from me, it's a'ight to be ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 29 00:01:25,272 --> 00:01:30,471 ♪ You can do what you wanna do in living color♪♪ 30 00:01:31,545 --> 00:01:34,878 Ladies and gentlemen, Keenen Ivory Wayans. 31 00:01:34,949 --> 00:01:39,409 [Applause] 32 00:01:42,957 --> 00:01:45,255 Thank you. Welcome to the show. 33 00:01:45,326 --> 00:01:47,886 - We're gonna have a fun show tonight. - [Laughing] 34 00:01:47,962 --> 00:01:51,125 Stop it! There he is! The man in charge. 35 00:01:51,198 --> 00:01:54,656 Hey, black strong. Give me a hug, man. Good to see you. 36 00:01:54,735 --> 00:01:57,465 You're doing dynamite work on this little thing you're doing right here. 37 00:01:57,538 --> 00:02:01,872 You don't remember me. 1978, Rahway State Prison. 38 00:02:01,942 --> 00:02:05,173 Fred Williamson film retrospective. I was running the projector. 39 00:02:05,246 --> 00:02:07,339 Don't ask what I was doing there. Another career. 40 00:02:07,415 --> 00:02:10,873 All right. You might remember me from Hartford, Connecticut... 41 00:02:10,951 --> 00:02:13,545 - where we had Ronnie Dyson's party. - No. 42 00:02:13,621 --> 00:02:16,818 Well, anyway, right now I'm managing a group called Stratus. 43 00:02:16,891 --> 00:02:20,327 There's 19 horns and the rest are drums. It's a new concept. 44 00:02:20,394 --> 00:02:22,624 We're doing a real hyped-up version of Backstabbers. 45 00:02:22,697 --> 00:02:25,666 He ain't the only one in music. I got a new single out. [Wails] 46 00:02:25,733 --> 00:02:27,667 Enough said, you know? Look here. 47 00:02:27,735 --> 00:02:31,398 I got a quick thing for you. How can two young, black, strong brothers like myself... 48 00:02:31,472 --> 00:02:33,497 get into this funky business you do? 49 00:02:33,574 --> 00:02:36,407 Wrote a couple scripts, and here's a videotape. 50 00:02:36,477 --> 00:02:39,173 - Go ahead and look at it, brother. - Give him a business card. 51 00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:41,271 You know, I'm fresh out. 52 00:02:41,348 --> 00:02:44,317 - You know I got one. Bam! - All right! 53 00:02:44,385 --> 00:02:47,354 Don't pay any attention to the name that's on the front, all right? 54 00:02:47,421 --> 00:02:50,049 But my number is in purple right there. You see that? 55 00:02:50,124 --> 00:02:54,493 - This one in crayon? - Right. I'm at my mom's house now. 56 00:02:54,562 --> 00:02:57,292 You can reach me on Boo Boo's beeper. That's the number. 57 00:02:57,364 --> 00:02:59,355 - Say, "Keenen's calling." - Listen, I gotta get on the show. 58 00:02:59,433 --> 00:03:02,402 You know, I have a flat. You have a jack I can borrow just a minute? 59 00:03:02,470 --> 00:03:05,337 And also, wouldn't nobody validate my parking. Ain't that a blip? 60 00:03:05,406 --> 00:03:08,000 - Excuse me! - Ain't that something? 61 00:03:08,075 --> 00:03:10,839 - I think I can help both of you. - Somebody told me about an after-party. 62 00:03:10,911 --> 00:03:13,436 - We're trying to boogie. - These people will escort you there. 63 00:03:13,514 --> 00:03:16,005 - Security. - All right! 64 00:03:16,083 --> 00:03:19,052 Listen, Keenen, keep it up, man. All right! 65 00:03:32,767 --> 00:03:37,602 [Man] KYYTnow presents a minority affairs program, Black Like You. 66 00:03:37,671 --> 00:03:39,764 Here are your hosts, Tom and Tom... 67 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,774 the Brothers Brothers. 68 00:03:41,842 --> 00:03:44,242 [Applause] 69 00:03:44,311 --> 00:03:47,769 All righty! Why, thank you. 70 00:03:47,848 --> 00:03:51,409 - How are ya? I'm Tom. - Howdy. 71 00:03:51,485 --> 00:03:55,478 We're delighted to host this very worthwhile show. 72 00:03:55,556 --> 00:03:57,581 - What do you say, Tom? - That's right, Tom. 73 00:03:57,658 --> 00:04:02,061 In fact, we've written a very special song just for this show. 74 00:04:02,129 --> 00:04:06,156 - Well, let's kick it off, brother. - Shall we? 75 00:04:06,233 --> 00:04:09,828 ♪♪ [Folk] 76 00:04:09,904 --> 00:04:13,305 ♪ Problems and blacks seem to go hand in hand ♪ 77 00:04:13,374 --> 00:04:16,969 ♪ Wherever they roam in this glorious land ♪ 78 00:04:17,044 --> 00:04:20,810 ♪ We'll help them with customs We'll help them with laws ♪ 79 00:04:20,881 --> 00:04:25,841 ♪ And we'll try to solve all the problems they cause ♪♪ 80 00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:27,854 - All righty. - [Cheering] 81 00:04:27,922 --> 00:04:32,086 - [Laughs] - Oh, stop it. Stop it! 82 00:04:32,159 --> 00:04:34,491 All righty. Well, let's get started, shall we? 83 00:04:34,562 --> 00:04:37,588 Yes, we certainly shall. 84 00:04:37,665 --> 00:04:42,102 Today's guest is a young man who says he was sent to prison for a crime he didn't commit. 85 00:04:42,169 --> 00:04:44,865 Yeah, right. 86 00:04:44,939 --> 00:04:48,966 Well, let's meet him anyway. Say hello to Mr. Rajeem Carter. 87 00:04:49,043 --> 00:04:51,443 Come on out, Rajeem. 88 00:04:52,980 --> 00:04:55,141 What's happening, brothers? 89 00:04:55,216 --> 00:04:58,845 Is that some sort of karate move there? 90 00:04:58,919 --> 00:05:02,411 Well, what's happening is we're doing a show. 91 00:05:02,489 --> 00:05:06,926 So, I mean, let's just cut right to the chase, Raj. 92 00:05:06,994 --> 00:05:09,428 - Right to it. - Yeah. What is your beef? 93 00:05:09,496 --> 00:05:12,294 All right, first of all, I want to say how glad I am... 94 00:05:12,366 --> 00:05:15,164 that there's finally a show where we brothers can discuss things. 95 00:05:15,236 --> 00:05:18,228 - Oh, your brother's here? Where's your brother? - Bring your brother out. 96 00:05:18,305 --> 00:05:21,172 - Come on out here. - I didn't see him backstage. 97 00:05:21,242 --> 00:05:24,439 Yo, yo, man, yo! I'm talking about us three brothers. 98 00:05:24,511 --> 00:05:28,003 I think you're kind of confused. We're the Brothers Brothers. 99 00:05:28,082 --> 00:05:31,108 You're a black guy who came to complain about something. 100 00:05:33,921 --> 00:05:36,185 Man, I'm not here complaining, see. 101 00:05:36,257 --> 00:05:39,749 I just want people to know how the Man screwed me up. 102 00:05:39,827 --> 00:05:42,887 - The man? What man? - The man? What man? 103 00:05:42,963 --> 00:05:46,865 You know, the Man... Mr. Charlie, Bobo. 104 00:05:46,934 --> 00:05:49,562 His legal system has railroaded me, brother. 105 00:05:49,637 --> 00:05:53,937 Well, there's your problem. Mr. Charlie Bobo's legal firm... 106 00:05:54,008 --> 00:05:56,875 hardly sounds like a reputable one to me. 107 00:05:56,944 --> 00:06:00,004 I mean, never trust a man with the last name "Bobo." 108 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,947 I mean, would you buy a home from Louie Bobo? 109 00:06:03,017 --> 00:06:05,747 I sure wouldn't. [Laughing] 110 00:06:07,021 --> 00:06:09,455 Say what? 111 00:06:09,523 --> 00:06:11,252 - What. - What. 112 00:06:14,862 --> 00:06:16,796 Y'all don't even understand, man. 113 00:06:16,864 --> 00:06:19,492 The police arrested me for no reason. 114 00:06:19,566 --> 00:06:22,000 - Come on! - Oh, come on. The police don't do that. 115 00:06:22,069 --> 00:06:24,537 They're your friends. They're here to protect and serve. 116 00:06:24,605 --> 00:06:28,837 Well, my friends dragged me out my crib butt naked. 117 00:06:28,909 --> 00:06:30,843 Well, gosh darn it, what the heck were you doing... 118 00:06:30,911 --> 00:06:33,004 butt naked in the baby's crib? 119 00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:40,243 Man, don't y'all understand? Man, I went to prison for eight years... 120 00:06:40,321 --> 00:06:43,154 and the only thing I learned was how to resole shoes. 121 00:06:43,223 --> 00:06:46,989 Well, gosh darn it, you should be darn happy that you learned a trade. 122 00:06:47,061 --> 00:06:49,529 - You're darn tootin'. - A trade? 123 00:06:49,596 --> 00:06:52,565 Man, nobody wants to get their shoes resoled anymore. 124 00:06:52,633 --> 00:06:55,124 - That's not true. - Well, heck, I've got a few pair backstage. 125 00:06:55,202 --> 00:06:57,796 You can start on them right after the show. 126 00:06:57,871 --> 00:06:59,839 You can even shine 'em for me. 127 00:06:59,907 --> 00:07:02,467 [Brothers Laughing] 128 00:07:02,543 --> 00:07:06,673 Shine shoes? Now, what kind of a Tom do you think I am? 129 00:07:06,747 --> 00:07:11,013 - There you go again. - I think he's confused. We're the Toms. 130 00:07:11,085 --> 00:07:13,280 - You're the angry black guy. - Right. 131 00:07:13,354 --> 00:07:15,948 You got that right. You're the biggest Toms I ever seen. 132 00:07:16,023 --> 00:07:18,218 - Why, thank you. - Thank you very much. 133 00:07:18,292 --> 00:07:21,284 I've been working out a little at the gym. 134 00:07:21,362 --> 00:07:24,525 - Well, actually, Tom Brokaw is bigger than us. - Yeah, he is. 135 00:07:24,598 --> 00:07:27,931 I guess it's obvious. Y'all guys, you can't relate to this at all. 136 00:07:28,002 --> 00:07:29,993 Man, I suffered in the joint. 137 00:07:30,070 --> 00:07:35,235 Hey, hey, hey! You don't give us that doohickey nonsense, mister. 138 00:07:35,309 --> 00:07:38,107 - That's right. I'll say "doohickey" again... - Hey, Tom, take it easy. 139 00:07:38,178 --> 00:07:40,112 'Cause I'm outraged! 140 00:07:40,180 --> 00:07:42,341 Doohickey, darn it, heck! 141 00:07:44,585 --> 00:07:47,679 Now, I want you to know suffering, mister. 142 00:07:47,755 --> 00:07:50,588 When you talk to Tom and Tom, we know suffering. 143 00:07:50,657 --> 00:07:53,251 Tell him about the time in Tahoe, mister. 144 00:07:53,327 --> 00:07:57,058 We flew to Tahoe for a work engagement, mind you. 145 00:07:57,131 --> 00:08:00,362 We had reservations, a confirmation number and got there... 146 00:08:00,434 --> 00:08:02,459 and only one of our rooms were available. 147 00:08:02,536 --> 00:08:05,403 - We had to share it. - And needless to say... 148 00:08:05,472 --> 00:08:09,408 that we were pretty upset behind that. 149 00:08:09,476 --> 00:08:11,410 I had to call my mom. 150 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:15,646 Lucky it was a suite, huh? 151 00:08:15,716 --> 00:08:17,775 Y'all don't even know what time it is, do you? 152 00:08:17,851 --> 00:08:20,684 - Sure I do. 7:25. - Sure I do. 7:25. 153 00:08:20,754 --> 00:08:22,688 I guess you're on C.P. Time. 154 00:08:22,756 --> 00:08:26,089 - [Laughing] - Can we get away with that? 155 00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:30,722 So I suppose y'all think I'm supposed to just move out into the suburbs, man... 156 00:08:30,798 --> 00:08:33,198 get a nose job, marry some white woman... 157 00:08:33,267 --> 00:08:35,963 buy a BMW and just totally sell out, right? 158 00:08:36,036 --> 00:08:40,939 - That's the spirit! - Yeah. Maybe you want to put a brim on that hat. 159 00:08:41,008 --> 00:08:43,806 Forget y'all! 160 00:08:43,877 --> 00:08:47,040 Well, I guess we showed him how to look at things on the brighter side. 161 00:08:47,114 --> 00:08:49,048 I think we certainly have. 162 00:08:49,116 --> 00:08:53,450 - Tell you what, why don't we sing a song about it? - All righty, brother. 163 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,284 And you know I mean fraternal. 164 00:08:59,460 --> 00:09:02,987 ♪♪ [Folk] 165 00:09:03,063 --> 00:09:06,521 ♪ When you're in trouble just call 911 ♪ 166 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:10,263 ♪ And right to your doorstep the police will run ♪ 167 00:09:10,337 --> 00:09:14,034 ♪ But if they should cuff you and give you a smack ♪ 168 00:09:14,108 --> 00:09:16,269 ♪ It's because you're guilty ♪ 169 00:09:16,343 --> 00:09:18,937 ♪ Not 'cause you're black ♪♪ 170 00:09:19,012 --> 00:09:21,606 - Good-bye. - Good night, everybody. 171 00:09:25,419 --> 00:09:27,353 Babaloo! 172 00:09:31,291 --> 00:09:34,556 ♪♪ [Hip-hop] 173 00:10:05,859 --> 00:10:09,556 You are strong, you are invincible, you are woman. 174 00:10:09,630 --> 00:10:12,997 Welcome once again to the show by, for and about women. 175 00:10:13,066 --> 00:10:15,591 Go on, girl! 176 00:10:19,173 --> 00:10:23,109 All right. I'm your host, Shiwanda Harvey. 177 00:10:23,177 --> 00:10:25,441 Today's show is going to be a little different. 178 00:10:25,512 --> 00:10:29,278 For the first time, we're going to have men on Go On Girl. 179 00:10:29,349 --> 00:10:31,874 - [Women] Ooh.! - Now hold on, sisters. 180 00:10:31,952 --> 00:10:34,182 These aren't your typical worthless males. 181 00:10:34,254 --> 00:10:36,984 They're sensitive outcasts from their gender. 182 00:10:37,057 --> 00:10:41,426 Let's have a big "Go on, boy" for Gregory Miller and Lionel Baker. 183 00:10:41,495 --> 00:10:43,986 - [Audience] Go on, boy.! - All right. 184 00:10:44,064 --> 00:10:45,998 You two are a rare breed of men... 185 00:10:46,066 --> 00:10:49,866 almost worthy of sharing this earth with us. 186 00:10:49,937 --> 00:10:52,405 All right. Gregory, you wrote the book... 187 00:10:52,472 --> 00:10:56,238 The Man Who Hates Men Who Hate Women. 188 00:10:56,310 --> 00:10:58,972 Tell me, who are these men you hate? 189 00:10:59,046 --> 00:11:01,344 Well, Shiwanda, you know the type. 190 00:11:01,415 --> 00:11:03,349 The type of man that picks up a woman, sleeps with her... 191 00:11:03,417 --> 00:11:05,351 and then splits around 2:00 a.m. 192 00:11:05,419 --> 00:11:07,853 - Go on, boy. - Go on, boy. 193 00:11:07,921 --> 00:11:09,855 I figure, you know, why split? 194 00:11:09,923 --> 00:11:13,222 Stick around, get some breakfast or something. 195 00:11:13,293 --> 00:11:15,227 Breakfast? 196 00:11:15,295 --> 00:11:18,753 I mean, of course, I'd be cooking. 197 00:11:18,832 --> 00:11:22,563 Shiwanda, I don't know what kind of game this guy is trying to play... 198 00:11:22,636 --> 00:11:26,072 but I think men who have sex without commitment... 199 00:11:26,139 --> 00:11:28,073 are animals. 200 00:11:28,141 --> 00:11:30,075 - [Audience] Go on, boy.! - Go on, boy. 201 00:11:30,143 --> 00:11:33,112 Commitment, right. I wasn't even thinking. 202 00:11:33,180 --> 00:11:35,114 You know, sometimes I need a woman stronger than myself... 203 00:11:35,182 --> 00:11:37,116 to get me back on the right track. 204 00:11:37,184 --> 00:11:39,414 Oh. I'm strong like that. 205 00:11:39,486 --> 00:11:41,454 [Audience] Go on, girl.! 206 00:11:41,521 --> 00:11:46,481 Fine, but a woman shouldn't have to lead a man around by the... 207 00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:52,157 I mean, a man should take it upon himself to wash the dishes... 208 00:11:52,232 --> 00:11:55,065 do the laundry and the vacuuming if need be. 209 00:11:55,135 --> 00:11:58,127 - [Audience] Go on, boy.! - That's the kind of man I like. 210 00:11:58,205 --> 00:12:01,140 Well, how do you feel about a man who takes care of children? 211 00:12:01,208 --> 00:12:05,668 Oh, yes. There's something about a man holding dirty diapers in his hands. 212 00:12:05,746 --> 00:12:08,374 Mm-hmm! Makes me just weak in the knees. 213 00:12:08,448 --> 00:12:11,975 Takes care of the children? Excuse me. 214 00:12:12,052 --> 00:12:14,384 I want to have the children... 215 00:12:14,454 --> 00:12:16,388 as you can see in my book... 216 00:12:16,456 --> 00:12:21,086 She's Having My Baby... Why Can't I? 217 00:12:21,161 --> 00:12:26,030 - Go on, boy! - I just want to have a baby so badly. 218 00:12:26,099 --> 00:12:29,626 I want to experience it the natural way. 219 00:12:29,703 --> 00:12:32,763 I'm sorry, Shiwanda. I didn't mean to get emotional on the show. 220 00:12:32,839 --> 00:12:34,932 Let it go. 221 00:12:35,008 --> 00:12:37,306 It's just that... 222 00:12:37,377 --> 00:12:40,073 - when I think about the beauty... - Mm-hmm. 223 00:12:40,147 --> 00:12:44,106 - Of holding a baby against your breast... - Mm-hmm. 224 00:12:44,184 --> 00:12:49,747 - All swelled with milk... - Mm-hmm. 225 00:12:49,823 --> 00:12:53,350 And that I'll never know... that kind of joy. 226 00:12:53,427 --> 00:12:55,895 - Go on, girl. - [Audience] Go on, girl.! 227 00:12:55,962 --> 00:12:58,795 Breast swelled with milk? What a wuss. 228 00:13:00,667 --> 00:13:02,601 Excuse me? 229 00:13:02,669 --> 00:13:04,603 Oh, don't let him get to you, Lionel. 230 00:13:04,671 --> 00:13:07,799 There's nothing at all wrong with having a highly developed feminine sensibility. 231 00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,808 Why, some of my best friends are... 232 00:13:09,876 --> 00:13:13,039 - Shut up. I'm no wuss, man. - Oh, yeah? Prove it. 233 00:13:13,113 --> 00:13:15,980 - Oh, now... - Last month I slept with 10 women. 234 00:13:16,049 --> 00:13:17,983 - That's nothing to be proud of. - It sure isn't. 235 00:13:18,051 --> 00:13:20,144 That's an easy afternoon for me, buddy. 236 00:13:20,220 --> 00:13:22,950 Yeah, well, I guess it takes a little longer to get from job to job... 237 00:13:23,023 --> 00:13:25,082 - when you're moving heavy equipment. - Oh, yeah? 238 00:13:25,158 --> 00:13:27,092 Yeah! 239 00:13:28,762 --> 00:13:31,287 Men are all alike. 240 00:13:31,365 --> 00:13:33,458 You know, you two aren't at all sensitive. 241 00:13:33,533 --> 00:13:36,001 You're as bad as all the rest. I mean, really. 242 00:13:36,069 --> 00:13:38,128 We got books to sell! 243 00:13:38,205 --> 00:13:40,139 [Audience] Get out, boy.! 244 00:13:40,207 --> 00:13:43,233 - Shut up! - Girlfriends, there you have it. 245 00:13:43,310 --> 00:13:46,541 Now we know what they really think and what they think with. 246 00:13:46,613 --> 00:13:48,547 Uh-huh. I make you this promise: 247 00:13:48,615 --> 00:13:51,049 No more men on Go On Girl. 248 00:13:51,118 --> 00:13:54,451 - Yeah, you love it! - Yeah, you love it! 249 00:13:54,521 --> 00:13:58,116 - Good night, everybody. - [Audience] Go on, girl.! 250 00:14:03,912 --> 00:14:07,905 Legally repressing my "ballsitude," 251 00:14:07,983 --> 00:14:13,421 I've retracted my "godads" with gigantic proportions. 252 00:14:13,488 --> 00:14:16,946 And the signing of the prohibition, you see... 253 00:14:17,025 --> 00:14:19,118 defecates the fluids of the tension... 254 00:14:19,194 --> 00:14:23,722 between the essence of the Euro intercourse, you see. 255 00:14:23,799 --> 00:14:28,634 [Woman] A. T. + T. Allows you to reach out and touch someone... 256 00:14:28,704 --> 00:14:31,070 even when they don't get out much. 257 00:14:31,139 --> 00:14:33,505 Right, exactly. Okay, brother, okay. 258 00:14:33,575 --> 00:14:35,509 - See, all you're doing right now... - Uh-huh. 259 00:14:35,577 --> 00:14:37,636 - Is flatulating your liquids, okay... - That's pretty good. 260 00:14:37,713 --> 00:14:40,181 - Because I believe it was Homo erectus... - Right. 261 00:14:40,249 --> 00:14:44,481 - That said to expose the hemorrhoidal ramification... - Uh-huh. 262 00:14:44,553 --> 00:14:48,512 - Would merely delineate the colonic orifice... - Ooh! 263 00:14:48,590 --> 00:14:52,686 Thereby separating the gluteus from the maximus. 264 00:14:52,761 --> 00:14:54,695 - Well, Homo was very deep... - Uh-huh. 265 00:14:54,763 --> 00:15:00,531 - But you seem to masticate the proclamation, my brother... - Okay. 266 00:15:00,602 --> 00:15:03,696 Because the gastrointestinal phlebitis... 267 00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:07,538 - prostigates the "crustation" of the colostomy... - Okay. 268 00:15:07,609 --> 00:15:09,975 - If that's your bag. - Uh-huh, for sure! 269 00:15:10,045 --> 00:15:14,243 Right. And further "hindrant" the pyorrhea, which has... 270 00:15:14,316 --> 00:15:17,046 - Excuse me? - Uh, you got me, brother. 271 00:15:17,119 --> 00:15:19,349 - The diarrhea. - Okay. 272 00:15:19,421 --> 00:15:24,358 Moving toward the angina or "bagina"... 273 00:15:24,426 --> 00:15:27,361 - depending on how much time you got. - Man, you are Metamucil. 274 00:15:27,429 --> 00:15:29,363 I know, I know. 275 00:15:29,431 --> 00:15:33,492 ♪♪ [Woman Singing] 276 00:15:38,473 --> 00:15:42,637 ♪♪ [Hip-hop] 277 00:16:13,141 --> 00:16:15,075 All right. [Laughs] 278 00:16:15,143 --> 00:16:19,239 Welcome back to the Miss Black Person U.S.A. Beauty Pageant... 279 00:16:19,314 --> 00:16:21,782 at the Lola Falana Recreational Center... 280 00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:24,819 in beautiful downtown Motown, Detroit City. 281 00:16:24,886 --> 00:16:29,323 Give yourselves a hand, would ya? All right. 282 00:16:32,060 --> 00:16:34,824 Now, I'm your host, Mr. Lamar Hightower. 283 00:16:34,896 --> 00:16:36,830 Would you give it up for me? 284 00:16:39,501 --> 00:16:41,435 Thank you so much. 285 00:16:41,503 --> 00:16:45,269 Now, we're getting much closer to that very big moment. 286 00:16:45,340 --> 00:16:47,672 But now let's take time to review... 287 00:16:47,743 --> 00:16:51,474 the swimsuit and talent competition, shall we? 288 00:17:05,427 --> 00:17:07,486 Beautiful, aren't they? Give them another hand, y'all. 289 00:17:07,562 --> 00:17:09,496 [Applause] 290 00:17:09,564 --> 00:17:12,362 Look here, it's time for the talent... 291 00:17:12,434 --> 00:17:14,698 and these girls have plenty of it. 292 00:17:14,770 --> 00:17:18,968 First up, reciting an original poem entitled "The Butterfly," 293 00:17:19,041 --> 00:17:20,975 the Windy City's very own... 294 00:17:21,043 --> 00:17:24,103 - Zahara Nariba Patterson. - [Bongo Drumming] 295 00:17:24,179 --> 00:17:29,048 I... am... Africa! 296 00:17:34,289 --> 00:17:36,689 A tear... 297 00:17:36,758 --> 00:17:39,158 falls from my... 298 00:17:50,906 --> 00:17:54,307 [Lamar] Next, from the balsa wood capital of America... 299 00:17:54,376 --> 00:17:57,436 performing an exciting new rendition of Shaft... 300 00:17:57,512 --> 00:18:00,743 Charlotte, North Carolina's own Lahonda Watkins. 301 00:18:01,850 --> 00:18:03,784 Give it up. 302 00:18:03,852 --> 00:18:07,117 ♪♪ [Soul] 303 00:18:22,804 --> 00:18:28,003 [Lamar] And finally, performing an original song entitled "I Am Woman," 304 00:18:28,076 --> 00:18:32,445 Oaktown, California's own Miss Alfreda Hill. 305 00:18:33,748 --> 00:18:36,740 ♪ I am wo-wo-woman ♪ 306 00:18:36,818 --> 00:18:40,618 ♪ Woman am I Woman are you ♪ 307 00:18:40,689 --> 00:18:43,556 ♪ I look in the mirror and I see woman ♪ 308 00:18:43,625 --> 00:18:46,651 ♪ You look in my eyes and you see woman ♪ 309 00:18:46,728 --> 00:18:49,720 ♪ Woman, woman, woman, woman ♪ 310 00:18:49,798 --> 00:18:51,959 ♪ Feline, feminine fantastical ♪ 311 00:18:52,033 --> 00:18:56,629 ♪ I am wo... ♪ 312 00:18:56,705 --> 00:19:01,506 ♪♪ [Sustaining Note] 313 00:19:13,522 --> 00:19:18,391 ♪ Man ♪♪ 314 00:19:21,730 --> 00:19:24,494 All right. Everybody having fun? 315 00:19:24,566 --> 00:19:28,161 I know I am. All right, y'all. 316 00:19:28,236 --> 00:19:33,037 Look here, we would show y'all the other two contestants' talent segments... 317 00:19:33,108 --> 00:19:36,737 but since we running out of time and they ain't gonna win anyway, who cares? 318 00:19:39,247 --> 00:19:42,842 Now that you know who our final three contestants are... 319 00:19:42,918 --> 00:19:46,581 - let's get to the judges' questions, shall we? - [Applause] 320 00:19:46,655 --> 00:19:51,024 If you could run the world, what would you do different? 321 00:19:51,092 --> 00:19:53,390 I believe all people are nice... 322 00:19:53,461 --> 00:19:56,021 even though they get mad sometimes. 323 00:19:56,097 --> 00:19:59,658 My personal hero is someone who never got mad... 324 00:19:59,734 --> 00:20:02,726 who always turned the other cheek... 325 00:20:02,804 --> 00:20:06,137 the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. 326 00:20:06,208 --> 00:20:09,575 - Thank you. - All right. Thank you. 327 00:20:09,644 --> 00:20:12,579 If you were stranded on a desert island... 328 00:20:12,647 --> 00:20:16,515 - what are the things you'd bring along? - That'll definitely be... 329 00:20:16,585 --> 00:20:20,487 the teachings of the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.! 330 00:20:22,557 --> 00:20:25,458 Please define the word "joy." 331 00:20:25,527 --> 00:20:27,620 Joy, sir? 332 00:20:27,696 --> 00:20:31,223 I do not know the meaning of the word. 333 00:20:31,299 --> 00:20:33,597 But the Reverend Martin Luther King did. 334 00:20:35,136 --> 00:20:37,070 - Thank you. - Thank you. 335 00:20:37,138 --> 00:20:40,539 Thank you, ladies. Give 'em a hand, would you? 336 00:20:43,178 --> 00:20:47,774 Hey, y'all, guess what time it is. 337 00:20:47,849 --> 00:20:50,579 It's time to announce the winner. 338 00:20:50,652 --> 00:20:55,385 Judges, I don't envy you, but give me the answer. 339 00:20:55,457 --> 00:20:58,620 - [Bongo Drumming] - Ooh, I'm nervous. 340 00:21:03,298 --> 00:21:05,459 Our second runner-up... 341 00:21:05,533 --> 00:21:08,866 Charlotte, North Carolina's own Lahonda Watkins. 342 00:21:08,937 --> 00:21:11,804 [Applause] 343 00:21:13,441 --> 00:21:16,569 First runner-up, and in the event that something should happen... 344 00:21:16,645 --> 00:21:20,137 to our new 1990 Miss Black Person U.S. A... 345 00:21:20,215 --> 00:21:23,082 you will, of course, be required to assume the crown... 346 00:21:23,151 --> 00:21:27,144 Chicago's own Zahara Nariba Patterson. 347 00:21:27,222 --> 00:21:32,319 Ladies and gentlemen, 1990 Miss Black Person U.S.A., Alfreda Hill.! 348 00:21:32,394 --> 00:21:35,522 - Congratulations! - [Shouting] 349 00:21:35,597 --> 00:21:37,758 ♪ Hey, Miss Black Person U.S.A. ♪ 350 00:21:37,832 --> 00:21:40,392 - ♪ You're the finest in the land ♪ - [Shouting, Indistinct] 351 00:21:40,468 --> 00:21:42,959 ♪ Hey, Miss Black Person U.S.A. ♪ 352 00:21:43,038 --> 00:21:45,768 ♪ Like a big, sweet honey-glazed ham ♪ 353 00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:48,035 ♪ Brown and lovely ♪ 354 00:21:48,109 --> 00:21:51,010 ♪ Like a bottle of ancient wine ♪ 355 00:21:51,079 --> 00:21:53,343 ♪ Know what you got ♪ 356 00:21:53,415 --> 00:21:58,352 ♪Just look at that big behind ♪ 357 00:21:58,420 --> 00:22:02,550 ♪ What a bouquet Miss Black Person U.S.A. ♪ 358 00:22:02,624 --> 00:22:06,082 ♪ She's black Ain't no taking her back ♪♪ 359 00:22:08,830 --> 00:22:11,697 Thank you very much. 360 00:22:11,766 --> 00:22:14,701 Tommy, you do the honors, man. 361 00:22:14,769 --> 00:22:18,034 Yo, we'll see you next week on In Living Color. Chillin'! 362 00:22:18,106 --> 00:22:20,040 Oh, damn! 363 00:23:04,486 --> 00:23:06,920 ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪♪ 31029

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