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1
00:00:01,956 --> 00:00:05,585
A man wins an Emmy,
he becomes preeminent.
2
00:00:05,660 --> 00:00:09,255
He has his certain enthusiasms.
3
00:00:09,330 --> 00:00:11,423
Enthusiasms.
4
00:00:11,499 --> 00:00:15,333
Now, can anybody guess
what my enthusiasms are?
5
00:00:15,403 --> 00:00:17,963
What it is that
brings me great joy?
6
00:00:18,039 --> 00:00:20,507
Shirts with loud prints?
7
00:00:20,575 --> 00:00:24,636
- [All Laughing]
- Giving jobs to people named Wayans?
8
00:00:29,917 --> 00:00:34,354
Baseball...
The great American pastime.
9
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Oh, yeah.
10
00:00:38,059 --> 00:00:43,122
You see, much like producing
an award-winning comedy-variety series...
11
00:00:43,197 --> 00:00:46,257
- it's a team effort.
- Yeah.
12
00:00:48,469 --> 00:00:53,202
A man writes his sketch
with setups...
13
00:00:53,274 --> 00:00:55,469
punch lines, follow-ups.
14
00:00:55,543 --> 00:00:59,946
The cast gets laughs,
we all get laughs.
15
00:01:03,150 --> 00:01:07,519
But what happens if a guy...
16
00:01:07,588 --> 00:01:10,455
writes a self-indulgence sketch?
17
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What do we get then, huh?
18
00:01:12,526 --> 00:01:16,257
- Uh, nothin'.
- Nothin'.
19
00:01:16,330 --> 00:01:22,291
You see, sometimes a man steps up
to a typewriter, thinking of themselves...
20
00:01:22,370 --> 00:01:24,361
trying to hit a home run.
21
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But the team gets nothin'.
22
00:01:31,545 --> 00:01:34,275
[Murmuring]
23
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Now that was merely
a demonstration.
24
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You see, even though
we've won an Emmy...
25
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I don't want anybody
resting on their laurels.
26
00:01:43,391 --> 00:01:46,690
- You got that?
- [All] Yeah.
27
00:01:46,761 --> 00:01:52,165
Good. Then let's get this show started
with some enthusiasm.
28
00:01:56,637 --> 00:01:59,265
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
29
00:01:59,340 --> 00:02:01,535
♪ In living color♪
30
00:02:01,609 --> 00:02:04,169
- ♪ In living color♪- ♪ You know what I'm sayin'♪
31
00:02:04,245 --> 00:02:07,476
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
32
00:02:07,548 --> 00:02:11,541
- ♪ In living color♪- ♪ In living color♪
33
00:02:11,619 --> 00:02:13,814
♪ You can walk on the moonFloat like a balloon ♪
34
00:02:13,888 --> 00:02:16,356
♪ You see, it's never too lateand it's never too soon ♪
35
00:02:16,424 --> 00:02:19,985
- ♪ Take it from me, it's a'ight to be ♪- ♪ In living color♪
36
00:02:20,061 --> 00:02:23,155
♪ And how would you feel knowingprejudice was obsolete ♪
37
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:25,357
♪ And all mankind dancedto the exact beat ♪
38
00:02:25,433 --> 00:02:28,231
- ♪ And at night it was safeto walk down the street ♪
- ♪ In living color♪
39
00:02:28,302 --> 00:02:31,396
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
40
00:02:31,472 --> 00:02:33,463
♪ In living color♪
41
00:02:34,842 --> 00:02:36,776
♪ In living color♪
42
00:02:36,844 --> 00:02:39,506
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
43
00:02:39,580 --> 00:02:44,745
- ♪ In living color♪- ♪ In living color♪
44
00:02:44,819 --> 00:02:47,014
♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪
45
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♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪
46
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♪ Everybody, everybodyeverybody, everybody ♪
47
00:02:51,592 --> 00:02:55,323
- ♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪- ♪ In living color♪
48
00:02:55,396 --> 00:02:57,694
♪ What's mine is yoursand what's yours is mine ♪
49
00:02:57,765 --> 00:02:59,926
♪ In living c-c-c-olor♪
50
00:03:01,335 --> 00:03:04,998
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
51
00:03:05,072 --> 00:03:07,472
♪ In living color♪
52
00:03:07,541 --> 00:03:09,566
- ♪ In living color♪- ♪ You know what I'm sayin'♪
53
00:03:09,643 --> 00:03:12,009
♪ You can walk on the moonFloat like a balloon ♪
54
00:03:12,079 --> 00:03:14,070
♪ You see, it's never too lateand it's never too soon ♪
55
00:03:14,148 --> 00:03:17,515
- ♪ Take it from me It's a'ight to be ♪- ♪ In living color♪
56
00:03:17,585 --> 00:03:22,716
♪ You can do what you wanna doin living color♪♪
57
00:03:22,790 --> 00:03:25,816
[Audience Applauding, Cheering]
58
00:03:34,435 --> 00:03:37,529
♪♪ [Soft Jazz]
59
00:03:41,542 --> 00:03:44,443
What's wrong, Marge?
You look worried.
60
00:03:44,512 --> 00:03:47,879
Well, it's just that that's Dave's
fifth helping of deviled eggs...
61
00:03:47,948 --> 00:03:51,247
and they give him such,
you know, gas.
62
00:03:51,318 --> 00:03:54,549
Don't tell me you haven't
heard about new Flatuscents.
63
00:03:54,622 --> 00:03:56,783
- Flatuscents?
- Yes.
64
00:03:56,857 --> 00:04:01,226
They're the new aromatic
suppositories from Pooco.
65
00:04:01,295 --> 00:04:03,627
It takes the worry
out of having gas.
66
00:04:03,697 --> 00:04:05,927
[Announcer]Yes, Flatuscents.
67
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:10,300
The new easily inserted,time-released personal aroma disks.
68
00:04:10,371 --> 00:04:12,532
Mm, lilac mist.
69
00:04:12,606 --> 00:04:16,736
My favorite is fresh herbal.
[Inhales] Mm.
70
00:04:25,986 --> 00:04:28,511
Dave!
71
00:04:28,589 --> 00:04:30,523
Relax.
72
00:04:30,591 --> 00:04:32,991
I have Flatuscents.
73
00:04:33,060 --> 00:04:36,757
Hey, do I smell fresh flowers?
74
00:04:36,831 --> 00:04:40,824
[Announcer] Flatuscents turna potentially embarrassing situation...
75
00:04:40,901 --> 00:04:42,835
into a burst of potpourri.
76
00:04:42,903 --> 00:04:44,837
Hold everything!
77
00:04:44,905 --> 00:04:50,036
Flatuscents now come in the most
exciting aroma yet... new car.
78
00:04:50,110 --> 00:04:52,476
♪♪ [Radio: Indistinct]
79
00:04:57,284 --> 00:04:59,252
Dave, is this a new car?
80
00:04:59,320 --> 00:05:03,017
Nope. Had a couple of chili dogs
at the game.
81
00:05:03,090 --> 00:05:05,422
- I don't get it.
- Make sure you do.
82
00:05:05,492 --> 00:05:09,155
Flatuscents.
Don't get gas without them.
83
00:05:14,168 --> 00:05:16,693
♪♪ [Jazz]
84
00:05:16,770 --> 00:05:19,068
[Woman]Mm, good morning and good night...
85
00:05:19,139 --> 00:05:22,131
to all you insomniacsand early-risers.
86
00:05:22,209 --> 00:05:24,734
It's 4:00 a.m.,and you know what that means.
87
00:05:24,812 --> 00:05:27,508
It's time for
The Magenta Thompson Show.
88
00:05:27,581 --> 00:05:31,381
She lit up the silver screen,and now she's going to light up your morning.
89
00:05:31,452 --> 00:05:33,784
Please welcome Magenta Thompson.
90
00:05:37,024 --> 00:05:39,584
- Ow! Will you turn that music off, please?
- ♪♪ [Off]
91
00:05:39,660 --> 00:05:41,594
- We're on. We're on.
- What?
92
00:05:41,662 --> 00:05:44,927
- I said we're on.
- Don't point at me. That's so rude.
93
00:05:46,901 --> 00:05:50,735
Hi. Welcome to
The Magenta Thompson Show.
94
00:05:50,804 --> 00:05:55,935
Uh, you know,
I was gonna do this, uh...
95
00:05:56,010 --> 00:05:58,706
monologue,
this opening monologue for you...
96
00:05:58,779 --> 00:06:01,805
but I can't really
find it anywhere, so um...
97
00:06:04,218 --> 00:06:07,813
You know, I guess I'll just show you
a clip of my performance in Shaft.
98
00:06:07,888 --> 00:06:10,789
That was really the, uh...
99
00:06:10,858 --> 00:06:13,850
That was really the, uh, role
that launched my film career.
100
00:06:13,928 --> 00:06:16,055
Paul, do we still have that
cued up from last night?
101
00:06:16,130 --> 00:06:19,099
- Yeah, we sure do, Magenta.
- Roll it.
102
00:06:19,166 --> 00:06:21,327
Get outta my way, bitch!
103
00:06:23,737 --> 00:06:25,830
Oh, yeah.
104
00:06:25,906 --> 00:06:27,897
I was really something
in those days.
105
00:06:27,975 --> 00:06:30,967
You know, that blonde on Mod Squad
never took a fall like that.
106
00:06:31,045 --> 00:06:33,479
You know, but I guess if you want
a prime-time TV show, all you gotta do...
107
00:06:33,547 --> 00:06:38,382
is give a little something to Mr. Quincy
"Ooh, I produce MichaelJackson albums"Jones.
108
00:06:38,452 --> 00:06:41,819
You know, one... one white, one black
and one incompetent little slut...
109
00:06:41,889 --> 00:06:44,016
that's what the show's motto
shoulda been.
110
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- Go to the sponsor.
- What?
111
00:06:47,094 --> 00:06:49,722
- [Indistinct]
- Yeah. Yes.
112
00:06:49,797 --> 00:06:51,890
It's the Mr. Drippy
Stop Smoking Kit.
113
00:06:51,966 --> 00:06:55,766
It's the only system
that uses carbonated spring water.
114
00:07:00,741 --> 00:07:05,337
Welcome, Mr. Drippy,
to the Magenta Thompson sponsor family.
115
00:07:05,412 --> 00:07:07,937
Now, uh, let's bring
on my first guest...
116
00:07:08,015 --> 00:07:12,816
another untalented blonde who, uh, managed
to land herself a prime-time TV show...
117
00:07:12,886 --> 00:07:16,549
for what reason, we can't really be sure...
Sarah Purcell.
118
00:07:16,623 --> 00:07:18,557
[Scattered Applause]
119
00:07:18,625 --> 00:07:21,890
- We got to...
- You're spitting on me! What?
120
00:07:21,962 --> 00:07:23,896
- [Whispering, Indistinct]
- She won't?
121
00:07:23,964 --> 00:07:26,592
- We got Pam Grier.
- Oh. Who?
122
00:07:26,667 --> 00:07:29,795
- Pam Grier.
- Pam Grier.
123
00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:31,963
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, Pam Grier.
124
00:07:32,039 --> 00:07:34,564
Well, uh, let's welcome
Pam Grier, shall we?
125
00:07:34,641 --> 00:07:37,508
- ♪♪ [Jazz]- [Scattered Applause]
126
00:07:37,578 --> 00:07:39,910
Hi, Pam. Sit down. Uh...
127
00:07:43,150 --> 00:07:45,675
You, uh, you want some coffee?
128
00:07:45,753 --> 00:07:48,017
No.
129
00:07:48,088 --> 00:07:50,454
I'm gonna have some.
130
00:07:50,524 --> 00:07:53,618
So, uh, Pam,
you, uh, you, uh...
131
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starred in a number of films
in the '70s, didn't you?
132
00:07:57,831 --> 00:08:00,425
Uh, Coffy and Foxy Brown.
133
00:08:00,501 --> 00:08:02,628
Uh, Big Doll House.
Uh, Black Mama, White Mama.
134
00:08:02,703 --> 00:08:05,638
I think that was the one
where you kept your shirt on, wasn't it?
135
00:08:07,741 --> 00:08:10,107
Well, anyway,
I guess the, uh...
136
00:08:10,177 --> 00:08:14,841
I guess the question
that I have for you tonight is, uh, um...
137
00:08:14,915 --> 00:08:17,611
Wh-Why wasn't I
in any of these films?
138
00:08:17,684 --> 00:08:20,175
- Excuse me?
- Look. Just don't bother.
139
00:08:20,254 --> 00:08:22,313
I guess I didn't sleep
with the right people.
140
00:08:22,389 --> 00:08:26,416
- I don't believe that l...
- You know, when I starred in Superfly...
141
00:08:26,493 --> 00:08:29,018
you know, I got that role
through my acting talent alone.
142
00:08:29,096 --> 00:08:32,497
- Th-There was no horizontal auditioning
for this, babe.
- You starred in Superfly?
143
00:08:32,566 --> 00:08:35,467
That's right. Here, let me show you whatI mean. Paul, do we still have that cued up?
144
00:08:35,536 --> 00:08:37,470
- [Paul On P.A. Indistinct]
- Yeah, roll it, hon.
145
00:08:41,809 --> 00:08:44,369
Get outta my way, you bitch!
146
00:08:45,446 --> 00:08:48,381
A little something that we used to call
"star quality," Pam.
147
00:08:48,449 --> 00:08:51,111
- That's real acting.
- Yeah, yeah.
148
00:08:51,185 --> 00:08:54,211
- Well, you know, if you wanna do that.
- Yeah, well, thanks.
149
00:08:54,288 --> 00:08:56,415
Pam, it's been, uh...
150
00:08:56,490 --> 00:08:59,425
What? What,are we landing a plane?
151
00:09:02,463 --> 00:09:04,397
You know,
l-I played those games.
152
00:09:04,465 --> 00:09:06,899
I jumped on the casting couch once or twice.
You wanna know what it got me?
153
00:09:06,967 --> 00:09:10,960
- I never did that.
- It got me the greatest role of my career.
154
00:09:11,038 --> 00:09:13,666
That's right...
Mother, Jugs and Speed.
155
00:09:13,740 --> 00:09:15,674
Roll it, Paul.
156
00:09:17,444 --> 00:09:20,140
Somebody get this bitch
outta my way!
157
00:09:22,049 --> 00:09:25,712
Yes. Yes!
158
00:09:28,789 --> 00:09:30,984
You know, I can't believe that ended up
on the cutting room floor.
159
00:09:31,058 --> 00:09:33,492
It really could have changed
the whole course of my career.
160
00:09:33,560 --> 00:09:35,551
- Yeah, I see that.
- Well... All right.
161
00:09:35,629 --> 00:09:37,722
All right!
162
00:09:37,798 --> 00:09:41,199
I guess that does it
for The Magenta Thompson Show tonight.
163
00:09:41,268 --> 00:09:44,704
Thank you for joining us. Um, won't you,
uh, tune in tomorrow night...
164
00:09:44,771 --> 00:09:47,797
when our special guest is Ann B. Davis
from The Brady Bunch.
165
00:09:47,875 --> 00:09:49,866
- Thanks.
- ♪♪ [Jazz]
166
00:09:55,682 --> 00:09:58,480
Pam, that's the end of the show, all right?Let's go here.
167
00:10:00,888 --> 00:10:03,516
Who... Who is she anyway?
I've never heard of her.
168
00:10:09,963 --> 00:10:13,228
[Announcer] You danced to their records,you sat through their concerts...
169
00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:17,794
now the singing soul sensations Cephus andReesie Mayweather are coming to your town...
170
00:10:17,871 --> 00:10:21,204
in the new Broadway gospel musical written,directed and choreographed...
171
00:10:21,275 --> 00:10:23,209
- ♪♪ [Vocalizing]
- By the Mayweathers themselves.
172
00:10:27,514 --> 00:10:32,417
♪ Get off the Lord's bus
if you ain't got correct change ♪
173
00:10:32,486 --> 00:10:37,014
♪ Don't sit on the devil's soul
if you're too hot to ride the range ♪
174
00:10:37,090 --> 00:10:41,652
♪Just keep singing gospel
if you don't start feeling strange ♪
175
00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:45,528
♪ Then one day you'll find yourself
home on the range ♪
176
00:10:45,599 --> 00:10:50,593
♪ So gimme a home
where the buffalo roam ♪
177
00:10:50,671 --> 00:10:54,107
♪ Where the deer
and the antelope play ♪
178
00:10:54,174 --> 00:10:55,641
- ♪ Hip-hip hoppin' on down ♪♪
- Now wait a minute!
179
00:10:55,709 --> 00:10:57,176
- Now wait a minute!
- What?
180
00:10:57,244 --> 00:11:00,338
- That's a different song.
- Sure is.
181
00:11:00,414 --> 00:11:03,406
[Announcer] You'll think the next stopis the very gates ofheaven...
182
00:11:03,483 --> 00:11:06,418
as Cephus sings"Can I Get a Transfer?"
183
00:11:06,486 --> 00:11:09,853
♪ Get a transfer
Can I get a transfer ♪
184
00:11:09,923 --> 00:11:12,983
- ♪♪ [Indistinct]
- ♪ Can't go to school without a transfer ♪
185
00:11:13,060 --> 00:11:15,358
♪ Can't go home without a transfer ♪
186
00:11:15,429 --> 00:11:17,659
♪ Can't go to work without a transfer ♪
187
00:11:17,731 --> 00:11:20,461
♪ Can't go to school without a transfer ♪
188
00:11:20,534 --> 00:11:22,593
- ♪ Transfer ♪
- ♪ Aah ♪♪
189
00:11:22,669 --> 00:11:26,070
[Announcer] Your heart will takethe express to that great station in the sky...
190
00:11:26,139 --> 00:11:30,599
when Cephus, Reesie and the entire ensemblesing "Don't Talk to the Driver."
191
00:11:30,677 --> 00:11:32,440
- ♪ Don't talk ♪
- ♪ Don't talk ♪
192
00:11:32,512 --> 00:11:33,911
- ♪ To the driver ♪
- ♪ Driver ♪
193
00:11:33,981 --> 00:11:35,312
- ♪ When the bus ♪
- ♪ When the bus ♪
194
00:11:35,382 --> 00:11:37,213
- ♪ Is in motion ♪
- ♪ Motion ♪
195
00:11:37,284 --> 00:11:41,482
♪ Remain behind the white line ♪
196
00:11:41,555 --> 00:11:43,489
♪ The white line ♪
197
00:11:43,557 --> 00:11:44,888
- ♪ Don't talk ♪
- ♪ Don't talk ♪
198
00:11:44,958 --> 00:11:46,585
- ♪ To the driver ♪
- ♪ Driver ♪
199
00:11:46,660 --> 00:11:48,025
- ♪ When the bus ♪
- ♪ When the bus ♪
200
00:11:48,095 --> 00:11:49,619
- ♪ Is in motion ♪
- ♪ Motion ♪
201
00:11:49,696 --> 00:11:53,860
♪ Remain behind the white line ♪
202
00:11:53,934 --> 00:11:55,868
[Indistinct Yelling]
203
00:11:55,936 --> 00:11:58,700
- ♪ I'm driving ♪
- ♪ I'm sorry, Mr. Driver. He won't listen to me ♪
204
00:11:58,772 --> 00:12:00,763
- ♪ Hey, driver. He won't listen to me ♪
- ♪ Beep, beep ♪
205
00:12:00,841 --> 00:12:03,639
- ♪ Hey, driver, excuse me. Excuse me ♪
- ♪ Get outta my way ♪
206
00:12:03,710 --> 00:12:05,644
♪ He gonna crash the bus
He gonna crash the bus ♪
207
00:12:05,712 --> 00:12:08,510
♪ Here we go
Here we go ♪♪
208
00:12:08,582 --> 00:12:11,073
[Announcer]Cephus and Reesie sing with such soul...
209
00:12:11,151 --> 00:12:15,053
such heart, such conviction, you'll swearthey know what they're saying.
210
00:12:18,325 --> 00:12:22,929
Coming Saturday to the Coleville CountyLivestock Show Arena.
211
00:12:24,531 --> 00:12:25,165
♪♪ [SoftJazz]
212
00:12:25,165 --> 00:12:28,760
♪♪ [SoftJazz]
213
00:12:32,439 --> 00:12:36,466
Oh, honey, I just love
dancing cheek to cheek.
214
00:12:38,512 --> 00:12:41,504
[Announcer] It's time for another episodefrom the annals of those zany crack-ups...
215
00:12:41,581 --> 00:12:43,515
The Buttmans.
216
00:12:48,722 --> 00:12:50,656
Gosh, hon, look at this table.
217
00:12:50,724 --> 00:12:53,921
Boy, you must have really
worked your head off.
218
00:12:53,994 --> 00:12:56,622
Oh, I hope it's okay.
I just can't believe it.
219
00:12:56,697 --> 00:12:59,393
Our little girl
is having her first date.
220
00:12:59,466 --> 00:13:03,425
Yeah, I know what you mean. It seems like
only yesterday you were in the delivery room...
221
00:13:03,503 --> 00:13:07,269
and the doctor held her up
and slapped her pretty face.
222
00:13:08,575 --> 00:13:12,170
♪♪ [Vocalizing]
223
00:13:12,245 --> 00:13:13,837
Hey, turn that off.
224
00:13:13,914 --> 00:13:16,280
[Singsongy] Brenda's got a boyfriend.
Brenda's got a boyfriend.
225
00:13:16,349 --> 00:13:19,648
Stop that! Now this is
a very important night for your sister...
226
00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:21,688
and I won't have you
making an ass of yourself.
227
00:13:21,755 --> 00:13:26,283
That's right. Is she ready?Richard will be here any minute.
228
00:13:28,195 --> 00:13:30,595
- [Mother] Oh.!
- Here I am, Mom.
229
00:13:30,664 --> 00:13:33,565
She's so lovely, I could cry.
230
00:13:37,003 --> 00:13:38,937
That's a lovely hair band.
231
00:13:39,005 --> 00:13:42,771
Do you like it?
I got the idea from watching a Cher video.
232
00:13:42,843 --> 00:13:44,777
[Mother]I love it.
233
00:13:44,845 --> 00:13:47,712
- That Richard's a lucky boy.
- [Doorbell Rings]
234
00:13:47,781 --> 00:13:50,579
Oh, there he is. I sure hope everybody
likes him as much as I do.
235
00:13:50,650 --> 00:13:52,584
I'm sure we will.
236
00:13:59,326 --> 00:14:03,456
Mom, Dad, Jimmy,
this is Richard Dickerson.
237
00:14:09,636 --> 00:14:11,900
Hi, everybody.
238
00:14:11,972 --> 00:14:14,964
Well, welcome, Richard.
239
00:14:15,041 --> 00:14:18,010
Everybody calls me Dick.
240
00:14:18,078 --> 00:14:20,444
I guess it's just
easier to remember.
241
00:14:20,514 --> 00:14:22,448
Boy, he sure does have a big...
242
00:14:22,516 --> 00:14:25,178
Dick plays football.
243
00:14:25,252 --> 00:14:28,016
Oh, shoot,
I'm just second-string.
244
00:14:28,088 --> 00:14:31,649
Well, sit down, Dick. Take a load off.
Dinner will be ready in a second.
245
00:14:31,725 --> 00:14:34,694
Thanks. I'm kind of bushed.
246
00:14:34,761 --> 00:14:37,525
Well, you know, our son Jimmy here
plays football too. Don't you?
247
00:14:37,597 --> 00:14:41,192
Oh, oh, oh, yeah. I play tight end.
What position do you play?
248
00:14:41,268 --> 00:14:45,170
A little nose tackle. They put me in
when they want better penetration.
249
00:14:45,238 --> 00:14:47,172
Mostly, I just hang out though.
250
00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:49,731
So, how did you two meet?
251
00:14:49,810 --> 00:14:54,247
We met in biology class.
When it comes to biology, Dick knows.
252
00:14:54,314 --> 00:14:56,839
Of course, I can't write
a term paper like Brenda.
253
00:14:56,917 --> 00:14:59,408
But when we put
our heads together...
254
00:14:59,486 --> 00:15:01,420
There's something else
that we'd like to do.
255
00:15:01,488 --> 00:15:04,082
Pork?
256
00:15:04,157 --> 00:15:07,149
Oh, no. Dick's allergic to pork.
257
00:15:07,227 --> 00:15:09,286
Makes my nose run like crazy.
258
00:15:09,362 --> 00:15:12,593
- Oh, no, don't.
- Well, we wouldn't want that now, would we?
259
00:15:12,666 --> 00:15:15,635
- Do we have anything else for Dick?
- Butt steak.
260
00:15:15,702 --> 00:15:20,639
My favorite. Put that between
a couple of buns, and I'm a happy guy.
261
00:15:20,707 --> 00:15:23,005
All right, well,
dive in, Dick.
262
00:15:23,076 --> 00:15:25,203
Buttmans, stuff your faces.
263
00:15:29,516 --> 00:15:31,984
I really had a great time
tonight, Brenda.
264
00:15:32,052 --> 00:15:34,919
I hope I didn't come off
as being stiff.
265
00:15:36,223 --> 00:15:38,191
Don't be a weenie.
266
00:15:40,060 --> 00:15:42,824
My parents may be watching.
267
00:15:42,896 --> 00:15:44,955
- Eskimo kiss?
- Okay.
268
00:15:48,501 --> 00:15:52,767
Oh, wow, honey. I'm really sorry
I seemed so distracted tonight.
269
00:15:52,839 --> 00:15:56,798
I mean, I didn't even know
my head from a hole in the ground.
270
00:15:56,877 --> 00:16:00,244
I know what you mean.
He's just so different.
271
00:16:00,313 --> 00:16:03,942
Yeah. Who would have
ever expected it?
272
00:16:04,017 --> 00:16:06,986
Our daughter
dating a white guy.
273
00:16:17,631 --> 00:16:21,260
All right, all right. Thanks for coming in.
Come visit us again, all right?
274
00:16:21,334 --> 00:16:23,393
All right.
275
00:16:23,470 --> 00:16:25,597
Later.
276
00:16:25,672 --> 00:16:27,833
Yo, yo, fight the power.
277
00:16:27,908 --> 00:16:30,069
[Chuckles]
278
00:16:31,077 --> 00:16:32,271
- Hey, Joy!
- What?
279
00:16:32,345 --> 00:16:33,778
- Joy!
- What?
280
00:16:33,847 --> 00:16:35,371
- Joy!
- What?
281
00:16:35,448 --> 00:16:36,745
- Joy!
- What?
282
00:16:36,816 --> 00:16:38,408
- Come here.
- What if I don't?
283
00:16:38,485 --> 00:16:40,419
I won't put you
in my next movie.
284
00:16:41,688 --> 00:16:44,248
Look, Spike. How many timesdo I have to tell you?
285
00:16:44,324 --> 00:16:46,087
It's notJoy, it's Joi.
286
00:16:46,159 --> 00:16:48,753
Joy, we're back in Brooklyn, all right?
All right?
287
00:16:48,828 --> 00:16:51,388
In Brooklyn,
it's Joy, notJoi, okay?
288
00:16:51,464 --> 00:16:53,625
It's notJackay, all right?
It's Jackie.
289
00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:56,669
It's not Sade, all right?
It's Sadie.
290
00:16:56,736 --> 00:16:59,637
- All right?
- All right.
291
00:16:59,706 --> 00:17:02,334
What you gonna call me next?
What you gonna call me, Spikay?
292
00:17:02,409 --> 00:17:07,073
Get outta here.
I wanna show you my new product.
293
00:17:07,147 --> 00:17:09,911
Check it out.
Ah, you likes, right?
294
00:17:09,983 --> 00:17:13,919
You likes, right? Ah, this is
the Mo' Better butter dispenser.
295
00:17:13,987 --> 00:17:16,319
Check it out.
296
00:17:16,389 --> 00:17:18,721
Ah.
297
00:17:18,792 --> 00:17:22,523
I've tasted butter,
but this is Mo' Better butter.
298
00:17:22,595 --> 00:17:25,996
Go stack that over there.
Stack it by the Malcolm Ex-lax.
299
00:17:26,066 --> 00:17:27,931
I got a customer.
300
00:17:28,001 --> 00:17:31,129
- Can I help you?
- Yeah, do you carry sneakers?
301
00:17:31,204 --> 00:17:32,102
- Sneakers?
- Yeah.
302
00:17:32,172 --> 00:17:33,469
- Like tennis shoes?
- Right.
303
00:17:33,540 --> 00:17:34,837
- Like basketball shoes?
- Yes.
304
00:17:34,908 --> 00:17:36,603
- Like just plain sneakers?
- Yes.
305
00:17:36,676 --> 00:17:38,871
- Got 'em.
- Oh, great.
306
00:17:38,945 --> 00:17:41,379
Check it out.
My own line.
307
00:17:41,448 --> 00:17:43,609
- Oh.
- Spikes. You like?
308
00:17:43,683 --> 00:17:45,378
- No.
- Come on. You gotta like.
309
00:17:45,452 --> 00:17:47,010
- No, l...
- Come on, look. You gotta like.
310
00:17:47,087 --> 00:17:49,282
- I don't.
- Please, baby, baby, please.
311
00:17:49,356 --> 00:17:51,824
Please, baby, baby, baby, baby.
Please, baby, baby, please.
312
00:17:51,891 --> 00:17:53,756
Please, baby, baby.
Please, baby, baby, baby, baby.
313
00:17:53,827 --> 00:17:55,419
- Please, baby, baby, please.
- Okay, I'll take them.
314
00:17:55,495 --> 00:17:56,519
- All right. You sure?
- Yes.
315
00:17:56,596 --> 00:17:57,927
- You want 'em?
- Yes.
316
00:17:57,998 --> 00:17:58,930
- You buy 'em?
- Yes.
317
00:17:58,999 --> 00:18:00,125
- You sure?
- Absolutely.
318
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,361
All right.
You can pay for them right over here.
319
00:18:02,435 --> 00:18:04,369
You get a copy
of School Daze with that.
320
00:18:04,437 --> 00:18:06,701
- Oh. That's okay.
- It's free.
321
00:18:06,773 --> 00:18:08,206
- Oh, it's free?
- Free.
322
00:18:08,274 --> 00:18:10,208
That's okay.
323
00:18:11,344 --> 00:18:14,643
- [Mumbling]
- Get outta here!
324
00:18:14,714 --> 00:18:17,615
What do you want? What do you want?I'm gonna go broke.!
325
00:18:17,684 --> 00:18:20,482
Here! Here!
You're gonna drive me crazy.
326
00:18:20,553 --> 00:18:24,512
- Mm-mm-mm. Thank you.
- You sound like a machine gun.
327
00:18:24,591 --> 00:18:28,152
♪♪ [Radio]
328
00:18:28,228 --> 00:18:30,162
Excuse me.
Can you turn the radio down, please?
329
00:18:30,230 --> 00:18:32,755
- ♪♪ [Continues]
- Excuse me.
330
00:18:32,832 --> 00:18:35,494
Can you turn your radio
down, please? Hey!
331
00:18:35,568 --> 00:18:38,537
Excuse me. I'd like to return
this free copy of School Daze.
332
00:18:38,605 --> 00:18:40,402
What's wrong?
It's defective?
333
00:18:40,473 --> 00:18:43,203
No. I didn't go to a black college.
I just didn't get it.
334
00:18:43,276 --> 00:18:46,473
Can you please
turn your radio down? Hey.
335
00:18:46,546 --> 00:18:48,571
- [Phone Ringing]
- Can you please turn your radio down?
336
00:18:48,648 --> 00:18:50,843
Hello. Spike's Joint.
337
00:18:50,917 --> 00:18:53,750
Ha, ha, ha, very funny.
Deliver pizzas to your house.
338
00:18:53,820 --> 00:18:57,415
- Yeah, right. For the 40th time, hell no!
- ♪♪ [Continues]
339
00:18:57,490 --> 00:19:00,050
Can you turn
your radio down, please?
340
00:19:00,126 --> 00:19:04,187
Hey, Spike. Why doesn't Nike appoint
any black people to its board of directors, man?
341
00:19:04,264 --> 00:19:08,166
It's a very complicated issue, all right?
But you can read about it in my new book:
342
00:19:08,234 --> 00:19:10,168
The Making of Nike Commercials.
343
00:19:10,236 --> 00:19:12,170
All right? $9.95.
344
00:19:12,238 --> 00:19:14,570
- I need 20 triple "A" batteries for my radio.
- We don't have any batteries.
345
00:19:14,641 --> 00:19:17,109
- You're gonna have to turn your radio down.
- No batteries?
346
00:19:17,177 --> 00:19:19,236
- Twenty triple "A"?
- Turn your radio down.
347
00:19:19,312 --> 00:19:21,143
- Turn that down. We don't have any batteries.
- Excuse me.
348
00:19:21,214 --> 00:19:26,015
Excuse me. Mookie, when are you gonna
take care of your kids, all right?
349
00:19:26,086 --> 00:19:29,920
It's... It's not Mookie, all right?
It's Spike, all right?
350
00:19:29,989 --> 00:19:32,014
Turn the radio down.
What do you want?
351
00:19:32,092 --> 00:19:35,255
- [Stammering]
- Get outta here. Get outta here.
352
00:19:35,328 --> 00:19:38,126
- Get outta here!
- How come there's no white people
on the wall, man?
353
00:19:38,198 --> 00:19:41,861
[Overlapping Yelling]
354
00:19:45,071 --> 00:19:47,665
This is Spike's Joint, all right?
When you get your own joint...
355
00:19:47,740 --> 00:19:49,537
[Overlapping Yelling Continues]
356
00:19:49,609 --> 00:19:51,702
You can put anybody
you want on the wall.
357
00:19:51,778 --> 00:19:55,407
- [Yelling Continues]
- The guy who was in Gilligan, man.
358
00:19:55,482 --> 00:19:58,645
Huh? How come he's not...
359
00:20:01,688 --> 00:20:03,952
[Baby Crying]
360
00:20:05,625 --> 00:20:07,593
Now, I know what
you're thinking right now.
361
00:20:07,660 --> 00:20:12,154
You're thinking, " Hey, now's a great time
to throw a trash can through the window."
362
00:20:12,232 --> 00:20:14,166
Well, I couldn't agree with you more.
363
00:20:14,234 --> 00:20:17,863
That's why I've got trash cans
in the back for $15.
364
00:20:17,937 --> 00:20:20,235
All right?
They're lightweight and riot size.
365
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:22,467
What a discount.
366
00:20:22,542 --> 00:20:24,510
You'll also get a free copy
of School Daze.
367
00:20:24,577 --> 00:20:27,045
- Oh, forget it.
- Nah, never mind.
368
00:20:28,815 --> 00:20:32,546
Get outta here.!What? What? What?
369
00:20:33,753 --> 00:20:36,187
M-M-M-M-Midget.
370
00:20:37,257 --> 00:20:39,418
[Applause]
371
00:20:43,830 --> 00:20:47,891
Hope you enjoyed the show.
We had a good time, as well, with you.
372
00:20:47,967 --> 00:20:50,231
And we'll see you next week.
373
00:21:34,047 --> 00:21:39,075
♪ You can do what you wanna doin living color♪♪
31763
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