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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,201 --> 00:00:03,136 [♪♪♪] 2 00:00:12,912 --> 00:00:16,082 ♪ There's a time for love And a time for living ♪ 3 00:00:16,082 --> 00:00:18,785 ♪ You take a chance And face the wind ♪ 4 00:00:18,785 --> 00:00:22,222 ♪ An open road And a road that's hidden ♪ 5 00:00:22,222 --> 00:00:25,325 ♪ A brand-new life Around the bend ♪ 6 00:00:25,325 --> 00:00:30,730 ♪ There were times I lost a dream or two ♪ 7 00:00:30,730 --> 00:00:37,203 ♪ Found the trail And at the end was you ♪ 8 00:00:37,203 --> 00:00:39,939 ♪ There's a path you take And a path not taken ♪ 9 00:00:39,939 --> 00:00:42,609 ♪ The choice is up to you My friend ♪ 10 00:00:42,609 --> 00:00:45,578 ♪ Nights are long But you might awaken ♪ 11 00:00:45,578 --> 00:00:47,414 ♪ To a brand-new life ♪ 12 00:00:47,414 --> 00:00:48,948 ♪ Brand-new life ♪ 13 00:00:48,948 --> 00:00:52,218 ♪ A brand-new life Around the bend ♪ 14 00:01:02,395 --> 00:01:06,166 [BOTH] ♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas ♪ 15 00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:10,336 ♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas And a happy New Year ♪ 16 00:01:11,604 --> 00:01:13,506 GEOFFREY: ♪ Chestnuts roasting ♪ 17 00:01:13,506 --> 00:01:15,308 ♪ On an open fire ♪ 18 00:01:15,308 --> 00:01:16,376 Aah! Aha! 19 00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:18,144 ♪ Jack Frost nipping-- ♪ 20 00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:19,145 [BABBLING] 21 00:01:19,145 --> 00:01:21,014 ♪ --at your nose ♪ 22 00:01:21,014 --> 00:01:22,949 [GEOFFREY HUMMING] 23 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,288 Geoffrey, don't you think there's something 24 00:01:28,288 --> 00:01:30,323 just a little impersonal about a postage meter 25 00:01:30,323 --> 00:01:31,458 on a Christmas card? 26 00:01:31,458 --> 00:01:33,660 Why? It's got a Christmas message on it. 27 00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:36,496 "Peace on Earth. Bulk rate." 28 00:01:37,864 --> 00:01:41,234 TONY: Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas. 29 00:01:41,234 --> 00:01:44,170 Heh. 'Tis the season to be jolly. 30 00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:45,371 Oh, hi, Geoff. 31 00:01:47,507 --> 00:01:48,508 [TONY GRUNTS] 32 00:01:48,508 --> 00:01:50,210 What a beauty, huh? 33 00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:52,479 Huh? That's gonna look great all lit up. 34 00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:54,214 Yeah, just like the guy who sold it to me. 35 00:01:54,214 --> 00:01:55,548 [LAUGHS] 36 00:01:57,283 --> 00:01:59,686 Huh? 37 00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:01,621 This is gonna be a great Christmas. 38 00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:03,022 You should see the goose I got. 39 00:02:03,022 --> 00:02:05,825 You sat on Santa's lap too? 40 00:02:08,561 --> 00:02:09,796 You know, Mona, 41 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,731 I was gonna tell you about my special stuffing, 42 00:02:11,731 --> 00:02:12,765 but now I'm afraid. 43 00:02:13,733 --> 00:02:15,602 Aah... Let's just say, 44 00:02:15,602 --> 00:02:18,972 this Christmas is gonna be a festival of Yuletide yummies. 45 00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:19,973 Mm. 46 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,741 You'd better tell him. I know. 47 00:02:21,741 --> 00:02:24,344 I'm talking six digits in calories here. 48 00:02:24,344 --> 00:02:25,545 Six digits. 49 00:02:25,545 --> 00:02:27,313 If you've got a belt, open it one notch. 50 00:02:27,313 --> 00:02:29,716 In fact, forget the belt. Get suspenders. Heh! 51 00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:31,184 Tony. Hey, 52 00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:33,520 I'm talking Scrooge would smile if he saw this dinner. 53 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,321 If Tiny Tim came to this dinner, 54 00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:37,557 he'd leave as Tim the Refrigerator. Heh. 55 00:02:38,558 --> 00:02:39,692 Tony. 56 00:02:39,692 --> 00:02:40,793 I know, it's a lot, Angela. 57 00:02:40,793 --> 00:02:41,995 I know it's a lot. 58 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,330 But, hey, Christmas comes just once a year. 59 00:02:44,330 --> 00:02:46,432 And you should see the way she packs it in. Whoa. 60 00:02:46,432 --> 00:02:48,501 Tony. 61 00:02:48,501 --> 00:02:52,071 Jonathan, Mother and I have been invited 62 00:02:52,071 --> 00:02:54,240 to Christmas dinner at Geoffrey's mother's house. 63 00:02:56,075 --> 00:02:57,844 Oh, well... 64 00:02:57,844 --> 00:03:00,246 They're all so anxious to meet Angela. And her family. 65 00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:02,282 Oh, well, I'm having dinner here. 66 00:03:02,282 --> 00:03:04,384 Tony's got a shovel with my name on it. 67 00:03:04,384 --> 00:03:06,152 [GRUNTING] 68 00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:07,187 [LAUGHING] 69 00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:08,588 Oh, Geoffrey, I have a great idea. 70 00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:10,290 Why don't we invite them all here? 71 00:03:10,290 --> 00:03:12,125 Great idea. Great idea. Yes. 72 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:13,560 The more the merrier, right? 73 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:15,261 Tell you what. I'll make six kinds of pie. 74 00:03:15,261 --> 00:03:16,796 I was only gonna make three, but with guests-- 75 00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,198 Tony. Tony, it won't work. 76 00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,133 I won't make pie. I'll make plum pudding. 77 00:03:20,133 --> 00:03:21,834 You don't understand. It's impossible. 78 00:03:21,834 --> 00:03:24,637 Mother's already booked the caterers. She's hired the help. 79 00:03:24,637 --> 00:03:26,239 Eh, well, I... 80 00:03:26,239 --> 00:03:27,807 I wouldn't wanna upset the help. 81 00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:31,444 Hey, Tony. 82 00:03:31,444 --> 00:03:33,546 Let's go get the Christmas lights, huh? 83 00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:37,584 I have a sudden urge to string something up. 84 00:03:39,752 --> 00:03:41,354 Hey, hey. 85 00:03:41,354 --> 00:03:44,357 I'm sorry. I hope you understand. 86 00:03:44,357 --> 00:03:46,159 Oh, yeah. I understand. Are you kidding me? 87 00:03:46,159 --> 00:03:47,660 It's Christmas. Families. 88 00:03:47,660 --> 00:03:49,629 Caterers. Heh. Hey... 89 00:03:49,629 --> 00:03:51,731 This is just like a regular Dickens' story. 90 00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:53,099 You know, all you need is Mr. Magoo. 91 00:03:55,868 --> 00:03:57,804 Mm. Huh... 92 00:03:59,138 --> 00:04:00,974 I can't believe I didn't find a thing for Tony. 93 00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:03,743 Well, it wasn't a complete waste of time. 94 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:06,412 You found a lovely present for me. 95 00:04:08,448 --> 00:04:09,749 I did? 96 00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:11,985 It's on your charge card. 97 00:04:13,686 --> 00:04:16,589 And you shouldn't have been so extravagant. 98 00:04:19,292 --> 00:04:20,960 Mother, what am I gonna do? 99 00:04:20,960 --> 00:04:22,295 Pay it out in installments. 100 00:04:22,295 --> 00:04:23,229 No. 101 00:04:24,397 --> 00:04:27,367 I mean, about Tony. 102 00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:29,669 Well, we found a lot of things that Tony liked. 103 00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:33,973 Look, the wallet, the belt, the girl at the perfume counter. 104 00:04:35,575 --> 00:04:38,678 No. I-- I wanna find him something that's just right. 105 00:04:38,678 --> 00:04:40,079 Something that-- 106 00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:42,382 Something that lets him know how I feel about him. 107 00:04:42,382 --> 00:04:44,450 How do you feel about him? 108 00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:46,519 Well, you know. 109 00:04:46,519 --> 00:04:49,188 I feel that we have a... 110 00:04:49,188 --> 00:04:52,358 But it's not what you'd call... 111 00:04:52,358 --> 00:04:53,726 And yet... 112 00:04:56,529 --> 00:04:59,032 Just tell that to the saleslady. Heh. 113 00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:02,535 Thanks again for the present. 114 00:05:02,535 --> 00:05:06,506 Oh. You're welcome. You're so easy to shop for. 115 00:05:06,506 --> 00:05:09,142 By the way, Mother, what did I get you? 116 00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:12,078 I can't tell you that, Angela. 117 00:05:12,078 --> 00:05:14,714 I want it to be a surprise. 118 00:05:18,885 --> 00:05:20,386 TONY: Good shot, good shot. 119 00:05:20,386 --> 00:05:23,990 JONATHAN: All right. Try and beat that. 120 00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:27,260 Oh, no, you won my Mickey Mantle! 121 00:05:27,260 --> 00:05:29,362 Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! 122 00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:32,432 Dr. Ferguson, 123 00:05:32,432 --> 00:05:35,368 you'd take a kid's most valuable card? 124 00:05:35,368 --> 00:05:37,537 You bet. 125 00:05:37,537 --> 00:05:39,272 Ah, the Christmas spirit. Ha-ha-ha. 126 00:05:39,272 --> 00:05:41,507 Come on, Sam, popcorn's all strung. Come on. 127 00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:43,543 Hi, guys. 128 00:05:43,543 --> 00:05:46,546 Aw, the stores were just mobbed. I didn't have time for dinner. 129 00:05:46,546 --> 00:05:48,915 Ooh, popcorn. 130 00:05:51,584 --> 00:05:52,785 Go ahead, Angela. Finish it. 131 00:05:52,785 --> 00:05:54,220 It comes with its own dental floss. 132 00:05:55,621 --> 00:05:57,423 Okay, Dr. Ferguson... 133 00:05:58,257 --> 00:05:59,325 double or nothing. 134 00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:01,227 What baseball player do you want? 135 00:06:01,227 --> 00:06:04,163 You know the only baseball card I really want? 136 00:06:04,163 --> 00:06:05,865 A Tony Micelli. 137 00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:07,367 Did they ever make one of those? 138 00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,936 Yeah, they made a few. Heh. 139 00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:12,638 Are you kidding? I-- I had a great pose. 140 00:06:12,638 --> 00:06:14,173 You know, I had that face on that said, 141 00:06:14,173 --> 00:06:17,744 "Wouldn't you like this guy to endorse your product?" Heh. 142 00:06:17,744 --> 00:06:20,980 Sort of like this. Hey. 143 00:06:20,980 --> 00:06:24,350 Boy, I'd really like that baseball card. 144 00:06:24,350 --> 00:06:26,319 It'd make a great Christmas present. 145 00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:28,488 Well, I wish I had one to give you. 146 00:06:30,156 --> 00:06:31,691 You don't even have one? 147 00:06:31,691 --> 00:06:34,427 How can you not have your own baseball card? 148 00:06:35,328 --> 00:06:36,295 But, Dad-- TONY: I-- 149 00:06:37,430 --> 00:06:39,832 I used to have one, but... 150 00:06:39,832 --> 00:06:42,435 a terrible thing happened. Terrible. 151 00:06:42,435 --> 00:06:43,736 What? 152 00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:45,605 Uh, well, there was-- 153 00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:47,874 There was this sports fan, and... 154 00:06:47,874 --> 00:06:49,776 And he was in the hospital. 155 00:06:49,776 --> 00:06:50,977 And it was his final wish 156 00:06:50,977 --> 00:06:53,613 to have a Tony Micelli baseball card. 157 00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:57,183 So, what could I do? I gave him my last one. 158 00:06:57,183 --> 00:06:59,085 You know, his wife called me. She said, 159 00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:02,422 "Hey, you could have it back after-- You know." 160 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:05,024 But, just my luck, the guy gets better 161 00:07:05,024 --> 00:07:07,627 He hits the lottery and he moves to France. 162 00:07:09,295 --> 00:07:11,397 Go be nice to people, huh. It's unbelievable. 163 00:07:12,999 --> 00:07:14,467 Oh... 164 00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:16,469 Tony, you did the right thing. 165 00:07:16,469 --> 00:07:18,838 Well, you know, I... 166 00:07:19,806 --> 00:07:21,207 Dad-- Samantha, um... 167 00:07:21,207 --> 00:07:22,708 Don't you think we should go and hang 168 00:07:22,708 --> 00:07:24,343 what's left of this popcorn on the tree? 169 00:07:24,343 --> 00:07:25,378 Come on. Come on. 170 00:07:25,378 --> 00:07:27,113 Okay. Thank you. Excuse us. 171 00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,948 Gee, I can't believe 172 00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:31,150 the guy doesn't have his own baseball card. 173 00:07:31,150 --> 00:07:32,652 It's a piece of his history. 174 00:07:32,652 --> 00:07:34,587 That's it. 175 00:07:34,587 --> 00:07:37,290 His baseball card. It's the perfect gift. 176 00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,392 Oh, Angela, thank you. 177 00:07:39,392 --> 00:07:43,029 [CHUCKLES] No, not for you. For Tony. 178 00:07:43,029 --> 00:07:45,231 Oh. 179 00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:47,767 Boom. Guy in a hospital? 180 00:07:47,767 --> 00:07:49,936 Wins the lottery? Moves to France? 181 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:53,372 Dad, you lied to Dr. Ferguson. 182 00:07:53,372 --> 00:07:55,007 Me? Lie? 183 00:07:55,007 --> 00:07:56,776 Are you saying that your father lied? 184 00:07:56,776 --> 00:07:57,877 Like a rug. 185 00:07:59,612 --> 00:08:02,014 You have that card, I just saw it the other day. 186 00:08:02,014 --> 00:08:03,983 All right, Samantha, I lied. 187 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:05,518 But I had a good reason. 188 00:08:05,518 --> 00:08:07,753 If he knew I had that card, he'd want it. 189 00:08:07,753 --> 00:08:10,556 Dad, he would not take your last baseball card. 190 00:08:10,556 --> 00:08:12,625 Yes, he would. You saw him. 191 00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:15,595 He takes cards from children. 192 00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:17,897 Are you kidding me? I want that card in our family. 193 00:08:17,897 --> 00:08:19,699 Someday you're gonna grow up and have kids, 194 00:08:19,699 --> 00:08:21,000 and I want them to see 195 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:24,003 what their old Grandpa Tony used to do, you know. 196 00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:27,340 You don't remember my baseball days, huh? 197 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,509 Sure I do. Yeah. 198 00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:30,776 Yeah. 199 00:08:30,776 --> 00:08:33,846 They had the best peanuts and the best popcorn. 200 00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:36,115 Oh, and those foot-long hot dogs... 201 00:08:36,115 --> 00:08:38,651 Ah, they just don't make junk food like they used to. 202 00:08:38,651 --> 00:08:41,420 Yeah, yeah. You too. 203 00:08:41,420 --> 00:08:42,722 No, no, what I mean is-- 204 00:08:42,722 --> 00:08:44,657 I mean, when your old man was out on the field, 205 00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:46,459 hitting home runs and turning a double play 206 00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:47,560 at second base. 207 00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:49,929 No. You were all dressed alike. 208 00:08:52,298 --> 00:08:55,268 Well, those happen to be very special times in my life. 209 00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:56,569 That's a very special time. 210 00:08:56,569 --> 00:08:59,105 You know, sometimes I dream about it. 211 00:08:59,105 --> 00:09:01,874 I think about the crack of the bat, 212 00:09:01,874 --> 00:09:05,111 and the sun on the back of my neck, the crowd cheering. 213 00:09:05,111 --> 00:09:06,879 Then I wake up and it's gone. 214 00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:08,047 And all that's left 215 00:09:08,047 --> 00:09:11,317 are a few memories and that baseball card. 216 00:09:11,317 --> 00:09:13,152 All right. 217 00:09:13,152 --> 00:09:14,754 I won't tell Dr. Ferguson. 218 00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:17,456 But, Dad, the next time you tell that story, 219 00:09:17,456 --> 00:09:19,859 lose France and kill off the guy. 220 00:09:19,859 --> 00:09:22,962 Ooh. Yeah. I'll bury the card with the guy. 221 00:09:22,962 --> 00:09:24,564 Oh, nice touch. 222 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,766 I like that. I like it too. 223 00:09:26,766 --> 00:09:28,568 So you gonna come back in? No. I've gotta get 224 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:30,202 Angela's Christmas present finished. 225 00:09:30,202 --> 00:09:31,337 Ooh, let me see it. 226 00:09:31,337 --> 00:09:33,039 Come on, hurry up. How's it coming? 227 00:09:33,039 --> 00:09:35,207 Oh, it's coming great. It's coming great. 228 00:09:35,207 --> 00:09:37,510 Uh-huh. It's a little primitive, 229 00:09:37,510 --> 00:09:39,679 but that handmade look is in, you know. 230 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:42,214 She's gonna love it. Look at that. 231 00:09:45,017 --> 00:09:46,152 This one here... 232 00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:48,788 Are you sure you read the instructions right? 233 00:09:48,788 --> 00:09:50,056 Oh, yeah. Are you kidding me? 234 00:09:50,056 --> 00:09:52,224 When this is finished... 235 00:09:53,225 --> 00:09:55,061 it's gonna look just like this. 236 00:09:55,795 --> 00:09:56,862 That's amazing. 237 00:09:56,862 --> 00:09:58,598 [LAUGHS] 238 00:09:59,865 --> 00:10:01,100 [BANGING ON DOOR] 239 00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,002 Yeah, yeah. Uh... 240 00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:12,411 Ho, hey, I thought Santa came down the chimney. 241 00:10:12,411 --> 00:10:13,946 It's Geoffrey Wells. Ha-ha-ha. 242 00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:15,481 Ah, yeah, well, 243 00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,783 that would have been my next guess. 244 00:10:20,019 --> 00:10:22,388 Can I give you a hand with that, Geoff? Ha-ha-ha. 245 00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:24,390 No, I think I've got it. Yeah. 246 00:10:24,390 --> 00:10:25,725 That's an awful lot of stuff. 247 00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:28,461 Yeah. Just doing my part for the retail sector. Heh. 248 00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,896 Aah. Way to trickle down, Geoff. 249 00:10:32,999 --> 00:10:34,700 Thank you. So, uh... 250 00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:36,035 how many of these are for Angela? 251 00:10:36,035 --> 00:10:37,203 Oh, none. 252 00:10:37,203 --> 00:10:38,871 Her present's right here. 253 00:10:38,871 --> 00:10:42,241 Oh, that's sweet, Geoffrey. Your love and affection. 254 00:10:42,241 --> 00:10:43,909 No. 255 00:10:43,909 --> 00:10:46,779 Diamond earrings. 256 00:10:46,779 --> 00:10:50,316 Oh, well, they're good too. Heh. 257 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:52,985 You don't think they're too big, do you? 258 00:10:52,985 --> 00:10:54,620 No. No, are you kidding? 259 00:10:54,620 --> 00:10:56,122 They're perfect. They're perfect. 260 00:10:56,122 --> 00:10:58,758 She could use them to signal passing ships. 261 00:11:00,726 --> 00:11:02,862 So, what are you getting Angela? 262 00:11:02,862 --> 00:11:04,797 Oh. Oh, I got her something great. 263 00:11:04,797 --> 00:11:06,098 Something really great. Pfft. 264 00:11:06,098 --> 00:11:07,466 Yeah, it's fabulous. 265 00:11:07,466 --> 00:11:08,868 But I wanna keep it a secret. 266 00:11:08,868 --> 00:11:10,936 See, it's top secret. I'm not gonna tell anybody. 267 00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,725 All right, ladies, what's your pleasure? 268 00:11:32,725 --> 00:11:35,561 We got Jim Palmer in his jockey shorts, 269 00:11:35,561 --> 00:11:38,030 Bucky Dent beefcake 270 00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:41,434 Uh, actually, we're looking for a baseball card. 271 00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:42,735 But I'll browse. 272 00:11:45,137 --> 00:11:46,939 You drool on it, you buy it. 273 00:11:50,509 --> 00:11:52,445 So you're looking for a baseball card. 274 00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:55,047 I've got them all. I know every player that ever was. 275 00:11:55,047 --> 00:11:57,249 I'd like one Tony Micelli, please. 276 00:11:57,249 --> 00:11:59,485 Never heard of him. 277 00:11:59,485 --> 00:12:01,954 I'll give you $50 for it. 278 00:12:01,954 --> 00:12:04,256 Oh, that Tony Micelli! Yeah, yeah. 279 00:12:04,256 --> 00:12:05,858 He played, uh... Second base. 280 00:12:05,858 --> 00:12:08,127 Right, right. For the... St. Louis... 281 00:12:08,127 --> 00:12:09,829 Bird team. 282 00:12:09,829 --> 00:12:12,031 Cardinals. Right. 283 00:12:12,031 --> 00:12:14,233 Oh, you know him. I'm so glad. 284 00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:16,669 This is so important to me. Oh, yeah? 285 00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:19,739 Uh, but not that important. 286 00:12:21,207 --> 00:12:22,742 Prices tend to go up 287 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:25,211 when one appears to want things too badly, dear. 288 00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:26,579 Right. 289 00:12:27,546 --> 00:12:28,981 It's, um, no big deal. 290 00:12:28,981 --> 00:12:30,649 It's just a little stocking stuffer. 291 00:12:30,649 --> 00:12:33,352 Oh, you need it by Christmas. 292 00:12:34,553 --> 00:12:37,156 All right, I'll give you $100 for it. 293 00:12:37,156 --> 00:12:38,524 Check back in January. 294 00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:39,592 Hundred and fifty. 295 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:41,227 Hey, how about a nice Mets beer mug? 296 00:12:41,227 --> 00:12:42,428 Two hundred. 297 00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:46,699 What if she just signs over her firstborn? 298 00:12:46,699 --> 00:12:48,801 You know, people don't realize 299 00:12:48,801 --> 00:12:52,238 how much is involved in hunting these things down. 300 00:12:52,238 --> 00:12:53,973 How much is involved? 301 00:12:53,973 --> 00:12:55,541 About another 150 bucks. 302 00:12:55,541 --> 00:12:59,211 [GASPS] Three hundred and fifty dollars? 303 00:12:59,211 --> 00:13:02,848 You must think I just fell off a turnip truck. 304 00:13:04,016 --> 00:13:07,520 I'll give you $325. 305 00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:08,654 Not a penny more. 306 00:13:08,654 --> 00:13:10,156 Deal. 307 00:13:10,156 --> 00:13:13,092 You drive a very hard bargain. 308 00:13:13,092 --> 00:13:14,794 [GRUMBLING] Mother. 309 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,095 So how much you want for this? 310 00:13:16,095 --> 00:13:18,097 Oh, that's a very rare poster. 311 00:13:18,097 --> 00:13:20,032 Forty-five dollars. I'll give you 6 bucks. 312 00:13:20,032 --> 00:13:21,500 Sold. 313 00:13:24,203 --> 00:13:27,373 ♪ You better watch out You better not cry ♪ 314 00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,743 ♪ You better not pout I'm telling you why ♪ 315 00:13:30,743 --> 00:13:40,319 ♪ Santa Claus is coming To town ♪ 316 00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:42,655 Samantha. Samantha. 317 00:13:44,957 --> 00:13:48,160 Stop singing that obnoxious Christmas music. 318 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,229 Dad, you better watch out 319 00:13:50,229 --> 00:13:51,964 because, you know, Santa Claus is coming, 320 00:13:51,964 --> 00:13:54,366 and he is not gonna like that attitude. 321 00:13:56,101 --> 00:13:57,102 Well... 322 00:13:57,102 --> 00:13:58,337 Sam, I know, I-- 323 00:13:58,337 --> 00:14:00,439 I'm acting just like a grinch. 324 00:14:00,439 --> 00:14:01,707 But I just can't figure out 325 00:14:01,707 --> 00:14:03,309 what to get Angela for Christmas. 326 00:14:03,309 --> 00:14:04,810 Well, what about the scarf? 327 00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:07,479 Oh, come on, honey. It's not good enough. 328 00:14:07,479 --> 00:14:09,982 Angela's used to the best, and my wallet isn't. 329 00:14:09,982 --> 00:14:13,853 Aw. Dad, she'll love it because you made it yourself. 330 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,521 You know, it's just like that ashtray 331 00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:16,956 I made for you in first grade. 332 00:14:16,956 --> 00:14:19,458 It's not that bad, is it? 333 00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:21,160 Oh, wha-- Oh. No. 334 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:23,762 Not that I didn't like your ashtray, sweetheart. 335 00:14:23,762 --> 00:14:25,164 I loved your ashtray. Okay, okay. 336 00:14:25,164 --> 00:14:27,967 I don't smoke, but I loved your ashtray. 337 00:14:28,834 --> 00:14:29,935 Hello? 338 00:14:29,935 --> 00:14:32,872 Yeah, this is Tony Micelli. 339 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,608 Yeah, I used to play for the Cardinals. 340 00:14:37,142 --> 00:14:39,378 There's a guy on the phone wants to buy my baseball card 341 00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:40,412 for 25 bucks. 342 00:14:40,412 --> 00:14:42,781 Tell him it's not for sale. 343 00:14:42,781 --> 00:14:44,617 Oh, you ain't kidding it's not for sale. 344 00:14:44,617 --> 00:14:47,453 Hey, look, pal, I'm sorry, but it's not for sale. 345 00:14:47,453 --> 00:14:49,688 That-- That card is a piece of my history. 346 00:14:49,688 --> 00:14:52,558 It's worth a lot more than 25 bucks. 347 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:55,895 Heh. Hey, it's worth more than 50 bucks. 348 00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:56,896 A hundred bucks? 349 00:14:58,197 --> 00:15:00,900 Are you sure you've got the right Micelli? 350 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,601 Hey, look-- Hey, forget it. 351 00:15:02,601 --> 00:15:04,036 Forget it-- 352 00:15:04,036 --> 00:15:06,438 Hey, look, they don't print enough money 353 00:15:06,438 --> 00:15:09,041 for me to sell that card. 354 00:15:09,041 --> 00:15:11,043 Yeah. How do you like this guy, huh? 355 00:15:11,043 --> 00:15:13,479 Wants to buy my card for 100 bucks. Heh. 356 00:15:13,479 --> 00:15:15,414 I'm a legend in my own time. Heh. 357 00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:17,850 Well, you told him, Dad. 358 00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,585 Yeah, I sure did. I sure did. 359 00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:24,089 Not that 100 bucks wouldn't come in real handy right now. 360 00:15:24,089 --> 00:15:26,558 Wish I could get Angela something really special. 361 00:15:26,558 --> 00:15:27,993 Ah. 362 00:15:27,993 --> 00:15:30,529 Look, I hung up on the guy, I don't even know who it is. 363 00:15:30,529 --> 00:15:31,530 No. 364 00:15:31,530 --> 00:15:34,133 [PHONE RINGING] 365 00:15:41,106 --> 00:15:43,175 Hello? 366 00:15:43,175 --> 00:15:45,978 Yeah-- Hey, look-- Oh-- Oh, yeah? 367 00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:48,814 Yeah? You may think everybody's got their price but-- 368 00:15:48,814 --> 00:15:51,250 Two twenty-five? That's mine. 369 00:15:53,152 --> 00:15:54,987 Okay. 370 00:15:54,987 --> 00:15:55,988 [SIGHS] 371 00:15:55,988 --> 00:15:57,589 You sold your card? 372 00:15:57,589 --> 00:15:59,692 Dad, whatever happened to showing your grandkids 373 00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:01,327 what Grandpa Tony used to do? 374 00:16:01,327 --> 00:16:02,695 Uh... I'll dress up in my uniform 375 00:16:02,695 --> 00:16:03,629 and tell them stories. 376 00:16:05,097 --> 00:16:07,599 Hey, here it is. Here it is. 377 00:16:07,599 --> 00:16:09,568 This is gonna blow Angela away, huh? 378 00:16:09,568 --> 00:16:11,370 Two hundred and fifty dollars. 379 00:16:11,370 --> 00:16:13,105 Dad, you always told me 380 00:16:13,105 --> 00:16:14,640 it's just the thought that counts. 381 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:15,674 Yeah, that's right. 382 00:16:15,674 --> 00:16:17,509 I thought, and now I'm gonna buy. 383 00:16:18,677 --> 00:16:23,615 ♪ Santa Claus Is coming to town ♪ 384 00:16:23,615 --> 00:16:26,385 [INDISTINCT CHATTERING] 385 00:16:27,186 --> 00:16:29,121 [LAUGHING] 386 00:16:30,089 --> 00:16:34,193 Oh. Oh, Ed is so thoughtful. 387 00:16:34,193 --> 00:16:35,961 Look, he remembered. 388 00:16:35,961 --> 00:16:38,464 Passion pink is my favorite color. 389 00:16:38,464 --> 00:16:39,865 Yeah. They all remembered, Mona. 390 00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:43,369 Okay, what's next? 391 00:16:43,369 --> 00:16:45,371 Well, how about a few more presents, huh? 392 00:16:45,371 --> 00:16:47,006 MONA: Okay. What do you say, James? 393 00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:48,941 Come in here. 394 00:16:48,941 --> 00:16:51,543 ANGELA: Oh! Oh! Heh. 395 00:16:51,543 --> 00:16:52,978 TONY: This way, this way, this way. 396 00:16:52,978 --> 00:16:55,347 Ha-ha-ha. That's my boy. 397 00:16:55,347 --> 00:16:56,682 Let me tell you something, Geoff. 398 00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:57,816 I've gotta hand it to you. 399 00:16:57,816 --> 00:16:59,752 This Rusty the Robot, what a great gift. 400 00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:01,987 Well, I figured he'd be a great help in your work, 401 00:17:01,987 --> 00:17:03,856 with the dusting, buffing and sweeping. 402 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:06,158 Plus, he'll be a fun pal to hang around with. 403 00:17:06,158 --> 00:17:07,893 Oh, yeah, he'd be a great pal, you kidding? 404 00:17:07,893 --> 00:17:10,429 We can watch a game and split a six-pack of STP. 405 00:17:10,429 --> 00:17:12,564 [LAUGHING] 406 00:17:12,564 --> 00:17:14,767 Oh, boy, an ant farm! Oh. 407 00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:16,268 GEOFFREY: Heh. Thanks, Geoffrey. 408 00:17:16,268 --> 00:17:17,636 Oh, you're welcome, Jonathan. 409 00:17:17,636 --> 00:17:19,438 But now remember this isn't just a toy. 410 00:17:19,438 --> 00:17:20,939 There's a lesson to be learned here. 411 00:17:20,939 --> 00:17:23,075 Ants work very hard, they're industrious. 412 00:17:23,075 --> 00:17:24,743 They're nature's little achievers. 413 00:17:24,743 --> 00:17:26,412 Yeah, but no matter how busy they are, 414 00:17:26,412 --> 00:17:28,313 they always have time for a picnic, Jonathan. 415 00:17:28,313 --> 00:17:30,382 Oh. Ha-ha-ha. 416 00:17:30,382 --> 00:17:32,317 Uh, ahem. 417 00:17:32,317 --> 00:17:35,120 Santa gave me something for you, Angela. 418 00:17:39,258 --> 00:17:41,560 [GASPS] Oh, Geoffrey. 419 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:43,695 They're gorgeous. 420 00:17:43,695 --> 00:17:47,466 Wow, they look just like real diamonds. 421 00:17:48,534 --> 00:17:50,002 They are. 422 00:17:50,002 --> 00:17:54,139 Well, dear, you must have been very good. 423 00:17:55,441 --> 00:17:56,775 [MOUTHS WORDS] 424 00:17:58,143 --> 00:18:00,012 Here's a little something to go along with it. 425 00:18:00,012 --> 00:18:02,481 Oh. Geoffrey. 426 00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:05,517 Oh. 427 00:18:05,517 --> 00:18:08,420 A rider for my insurance policy. 428 00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:10,355 Oh, thank you. 429 00:18:10,355 --> 00:18:11,890 Here's another one for Angela. 430 00:18:11,890 --> 00:18:14,526 Oh, Geoffrey. Tiffany's. 431 00:18:14,526 --> 00:18:16,295 You spoil me. 432 00:18:16,295 --> 00:18:19,431 Well, actually, it's not from Geoffrey. 433 00:18:22,734 --> 00:18:23,735 Tony? 434 00:18:23,735 --> 00:18:25,170 Well, yeah... 435 00:18:32,578 --> 00:18:35,247 [GASPS] Oh. 436 00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:42,121 Oh, what a beautiful vase. 437 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:43,755 Oh, no, it's a vause. 438 00:18:43,755 --> 00:18:44,823 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 439 00:18:44,823 --> 00:18:46,024 Ooh! 440 00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:47,960 Oh, Angela, Oh. 441 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,529 that's French lead crystal. 442 00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:51,763 Boy, oh, boy, 443 00:18:51,763 --> 00:18:54,299 that must have cost beaucoup de bucks. 444 00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:55,334 [CHUCKLES] 445 00:18:55,334 --> 00:18:57,102 Oui, oui, Madame. Ho. 446 00:18:58,103 --> 00:19:00,105 Oh, Tony, it's just... 447 00:19:00,105 --> 00:19:01,507 It's beautiful. 448 00:19:01,507 --> 00:19:04,309 But you shouldn't have spent so much money on me. 449 00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:07,312 Well, yeah, but Merry Christmas. 450 00:19:07,312 --> 00:19:08,814 Thank you. 451 00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:11,817 Here's one for Tony. Oh. 452 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,118 Oh... 453 00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:15,621 From Angela. Heh. 454 00:19:15,621 --> 00:19:17,556 Let me guess, a tennis racket. 455 00:19:17,556 --> 00:19:18,957 No! Ha-ha-ha. 456 00:19:18,957 --> 00:19:20,092 Come on. Open it up. 457 00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:21,293 Okay. 458 00:19:22,561 --> 00:19:23,996 See. 459 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:31,470 See, it-- It's a piece of your history. 460 00:19:31,470 --> 00:19:32,804 Oh, Angela. 461 00:19:32,804 --> 00:19:36,475 This is the greatest present anybody's ever given me. 462 00:19:36,475 --> 00:19:37,743 I mean, look at this. 463 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:39,811 It's even bent on the corner like mine was. 464 00:19:39,811 --> 00:19:41,146 [CHUCKLES] Oh. 465 00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:47,252 Wait a minute. 466 00:19:47,252 --> 00:19:48,887 This is my card. 467 00:19:48,887 --> 00:19:51,156 I mean, it was my card before I sold it. 468 00:19:51,156 --> 00:19:53,458 No. No, you don't have a baseball card. 469 00:19:53,458 --> 00:19:56,328 You told Dr. Ferguson that you di-- Well-- 470 00:19:56,328 --> 00:19:57,663 I didn't wanna give it to him. 471 00:19:57,663 --> 00:19:59,665 Well, then why did you sell it? 472 00:20:00,566 --> 00:20:02,568 You know... 473 00:20:05,771 --> 00:20:07,506 Oh... 474 00:20:08,073 --> 00:20:10,842 Oh, Tony. 475 00:20:10,842 --> 00:20:14,446 I didn't realize how beautiful this vase really is. 476 00:20:14,446 --> 00:20:15,447 I mean vause. 477 00:20:15,447 --> 00:20:16,381 [MONA & TONY CHUCKLE] 478 00:20:19,351 --> 00:20:21,186 Well, Mother's turkey's just about cooked. 479 00:20:21,186 --> 00:20:22,321 Just a minute, Geoffrey. 480 00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:24,356 I wanna find a really special place for this. 481 00:20:24,356 --> 00:20:26,158 Well, what about my place? 482 00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:27,693 [CHUCKLES] 483 00:20:27,693 --> 00:20:29,161 How about...? 484 00:20:29,161 --> 00:20:30,629 How about right over here, huh? 485 00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:32,464 Oh. 486 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,936 Gee, I sure like it. 487 00:20:37,936 --> 00:20:40,005 I sure like it too. 488 00:20:40,005 --> 00:20:41,673 Angela. 489 00:20:41,673 --> 00:20:44,243 You're standing under the mistletoe. 490 00:20:54,219 --> 00:20:56,054 Well, I guess it's time to be going. 491 00:20:56,054 --> 00:20:57,923 Yeah, yeah. You know, there's nothing worse 492 00:20:57,923 --> 00:20:59,224 than dried up turkey. Yeah. 493 00:20:59,224 --> 00:21:01,293 Oh, I'm sure Geoffrey's mother 494 00:21:01,293 --> 00:21:03,629 is a very nice person. 495 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,167 Well, uh... 496 00:21:09,167 --> 00:21:10,502 we're off. Heh. Yes. 497 00:21:10,502 --> 00:21:13,038 There's another present in the car with your name on it. 498 00:21:13,038 --> 00:21:14,706 Oh, Geoffrey, you shouldn't have. 499 00:21:14,706 --> 00:21:16,642 Merry Christmas. Have a good time, everybody. 500 00:21:16,642 --> 00:21:18,143 ANGELA: Yeah. TONY: Bye, Jonathan. 501 00:21:18,143 --> 00:21:19,544 Merry Christmas. Bye, Geoffrey. 502 00:21:19,544 --> 00:21:21,947 Have a good dinner, everybody, and... 503 00:21:22,614 --> 00:21:25,450 Merry Christmas. 504 00:21:32,090 --> 00:21:33,625 Well, what do you say? 505 00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:35,794 Who's ready for a great Christmas dinner? 506 00:21:35,794 --> 00:21:37,129 BOTH: I am. 507 00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,297 Come on, ladies. 508 00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:40,899 Hey, hey, hey. What are you standing there? 509 00:21:40,899 --> 00:21:41,900 Clean this place up. 510 00:21:41,900 --> 00:21:43,435 [BEEPING] 511 00:21:43,435 --> 00:21:46,305 Merry Christmas to you too. Heh, heh. 512 00:21:48,974 --> 00:21:51,677 God bless us, everyone. 513 00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:03,689 Jonathan's nestled, all snug in his bed 514 00:22:03,689 --> 00:22:05,891 while visions of sugarplums dance in his head. 515 00:22:05,891 --> 00:22:06,892 [CHUCKLES] 516 00:22:06,892 --> 00:22:08,327 Sure it's not ants? Heh. 517 00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:09,995 [CHUCKLES] 518 00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:13,432 So did you have fun at Geoff's? 519 00:22:13,432 --> 00:22:16,001 Oh, the entertainment was spectacular. 520 00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:18,036 Oh, yeah? Twelve drummers drumming, 521 00:22:18,036 --> 00:22:20,005 11 pipers piping, 522 00:22:20,005 --> 00:22:22,007 10 lords a-leaping. 523 00:22:22,007 --> 00:22:23,175 You have any aspirin? 524 00:22:23,175 --> 00:22:24,910 Yeah, sure. Hey, let me ask you a question. 525 00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:27,012 How did they do the maids a-milk--? Never mind. 526 00:22:29,481 --> 00:22:30,749 There you go. 527 00:22:30,749 --> 00:22:33,051 Hey, uh, so... 528 00:22:34,619 --> 00:22:36,388 ...how was the dinner? 529 00:22:36,388 --> 00:22:38,056 Turkey was a little dry. 530 00:22:38,056 --> 00:22:40,559 [CHUCKLES] Well, I wanna say, 531 00:22:40,559 --> 00:22:42,661 but that's what you get with those catered meals. 532 00:22:42,661 --> 00:22:44,996 On the other hand, you should've tasted our goose. 533 00:22:44,996 --> 00:22:46,998 It was so juicy. [SLURPS] 534 00:22:46,998 --> 00:22:48,500 Oh, wap. 535 00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:50,535 [LAUGHS] 536 00:22:50,535 --> 00:22:51,770 Would you like a little taste? 537 00:22:51,770 --> 00:22:54,072 No, thank you. You sure? A little taste? 538 00:22:54,072 --> 00:22:55,107 Okay, a little taste. Ha! 539 00:22:57,309 --> 00:22:59,111 Aha! Here she is. 540 00:22:59,111 --> 00:23:00,812 Here she is, huh? Oh. 541 00:23:00,812 --> 00:23:02,080 Yeah, sit down. Oh. Oh. 542 00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:04,783 Let me ask you a question, how was the stuffing? 543 00:23:04,783 --> 00:23:06,284 Well, it was a little bland. 544 00:23:06,284 --> 00:23:08,687 Mother Wells is on a low-sodium diet. 545 00:23:08,687 --> 00:23:09,988 Ah. Poor thing. 546 00:23:11,323 --> 00:23:13,125 There we go. Oh. 547 00:23:13,125 --> 00:23:14,426 Just close the refrigerator. 548 00:23:14,426 --> 00:23:15,627 Hey. Oh. 549 00:23:15,627 --> 00:23:16,628 I got it. Here we are. 550 00:23:16,628 --> 00:23:17,863 [GASPING] 551 00:23:17,863 --> 00:23:19,564 Some... 552 00:23:19,564 --> 00:23:22,000 Oh, are yo--? Are you having some too? 553 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,002 Well, I think I have room for a little myself. 554 00:23:24,002 --> 00:23:25,537 There you go. Thanks. 555 00:23:25,537 --> 00:23:26,905 All right. 556 00:23:26,905 --> 00:23:28,173 Uh-huh. 557 00:23:28,173 --> 00:23:30,008 Have some of this, Uh-huh. 558 00:23:30,008 --> 00:23:31,543 a little of this, Mm. 559 00:23:31,543 --> 00:23:33,512 some more of this, Mm. 560 00:23:33,512 --> 00:23:35,447 and a little of this. 561 00:23:36,648 --> 00:23:38,550 A couple of potatoes. Heh. 562 00:23:38,550 --> 00:23:40,685 Tony, enough. That's enough. 563 00:23:40,685 --> 00:23:43,522 You have any cranberry sauce? Oh, yeah. 564 00:23:43,522 --> 00:23:45,357 Just happen to have some right here. Hey. 565 00:23:45,357 --> 00:23:46,858 Great. There you are. 566 00:23:46,858 --> 00:23:48,527 Thanks. Huh. 567 00:23:48,527 --> 00:23:50,562 Uh-oh. 568 00:23:50,562 --> 00:23:53,165 You ready? Look what I found. 569 00:23:53,899 --> 00:23:55,600 Ahh. Ahh. 570 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:56,768 All right. 571 00:23:56,768 --> 00:23:58,069 Close your eyes and make a wish. 572 00:23:58,069 --> 00:23:59,504 Okay. 573 00:24:13,919 --> 00:24:16,855 [♪♪♪] 574 00:24:40,178 --> 00:24:42,113 Closed Captions: Sara Meyer 39805

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