Original subtitles

IRV: Previously on Everwood.

-Amy, what is it? -Colin´s coming home.

So he´s coming home.

A little too soon, if you ask me.

[ALL CHEERING]

I don´t remember the accident. I don´t even remember you.

He can´t even remember my name.

Look, my dad said it just takes a while.

I mean, he´ll remember eventually.

You´ve just gotta stick it out.

You don´t have to fake it anymore.

I know you don´t remember me.

-I´m Amy. -I´m Colin.

EDNA: Yeah, more cards. ANDY: Alright.

EVELYN: Yeah, do a number.

[EVELYN LAUGHING]

IRV: Every storyteller knows...

...that at the heart of any great tale...

...is the hero who inspired it.

Legends whose names are known...

...whose lives we remember...

...whose stories we pass on.

Alexander the Great.

Okay, I´m in.

IRV: Ernest Hemingway.

I fold.

IRV: Marilyn Monroe.

I got nothing.

IRV: The older the tale...

...the more romantic embellishments

we tale-spinners add.

It helps create the illusion of an individual...

... who is larger than life.

Dr. Brown was a legend in his own right by the time...

he came to Everwood but he wasn´t the only one.

Ladies and gentlemen...

...a full house.

[ALL GROAN]

-She got you again, Dad. -Damn.

I thought for sure you were bluffing this time.

Wait till I tell Uta. She´ll be thrilled.

You studied acting under Uta Hagen?

Not acting, darling, poker.

[ALL CHUCKLE]

Tell her about the time you met Jack Lemmon in the john.

She was in the men´s room.

It was one of those Frenchy restaurants.

I forget the name. Uno-- Duono--

EVELYN: No, Edna, it wasn´t, it was a Mexican restaurant.

I accidentally walked into the men´s room.

Who should be standing finishing up his business...

...but Mr. Jack Lemmon himself.

Of course, I had met him several times in passing.

She´d just seen him in Long Day´s Journey weeks before.

Anyway...

...I´m standing there. I am so embarrassed.

-Mr. Lemmon zipping up. -So, what did you say?

Well, what else could I say except:

"Well, nobody´s perfect."

I don´t get it.

It´s a famous last line from an old movie.

-You´d love it. -Can I have a little more water?

I´ve got this tickle in my throat.

I´ll get you a fresh glass.

EVELYN: You have a beautiful home.

Thank you.

So, what brought you to Everwood?

My career was at a standstill in New York...

...a friend asked me to direct a production at the opera house.

-I was gonna stay the summer. -How long ago was that?

About 12 years ago.

And now I mostly teach classes

and I´ll direct a play now and again in Denver...

...but every winter I direct a musical here in Everwood...

...and Edna´s my stage manager.

How about auditioning? We´re doing The King and I.

I´m sorry, I haven´t done a musical since high school...

...and even then, I wasn´t very good.

I had the worst time memorizing lines.

[COUGHS]

You should stop by my office tomorrow so I can check that.

No, there´s no need. It´s probably a flu.

Probably, but I could take a look.

Well, Alright. I´ll make my way over...

...to your train station if you´ll audition with me.

Don´t know how I feel about balloon pants. I´ll think.

Anyone for another hand?

Not this one. Time to hit the sack, kiddo.

It was nice meeting you, Evelyn.

And you too, dear.

Are you gonna try out for my musical?

Well, you have such expressive eyes, you´d be a natural.

I have expressive eyes?

You gotta be kidding. Nicole Kidman would kill

for those peepers.

Now, what about singing? Do you like to sing?

She has a beautiful voice. Takes after her mother that way.

EVELYN: Okay, it´s agreed.

Auditions this week, and don´t you forget.

I won´t. Thanks, Evelyn.

And just like that, a star is born.

You have to buy my sheet music first thing tomorrow morning.

ANDY: And a star´s assistant.

Hey.

You ready for your first day of school?

Sure.

-What´s that? -It´s your Miners jacket.

You gave it to me last year. I thought you might wanna wear it.

-Yeah, sure. -Okay.

♫ Lookin´ back on the track for a little green bag ♫

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

BRIGHT: Clear the way, people.

Clear the way. My brother has returned.

You´ve got homeroom,

and then first period is with Mr. Bedford.

He´s a bit out of it, so he may not notice you.

We both have Mrs. Chatman for journalism. She´s

not nice at all, unless she likes you and

then you´re golden.

Does she like me?

Everybody likes you, Colin.

You wouldn´t happen to remember where homeroom is, would you?

-No clue. AMY: That´s okay, I´ll show you.

It´s weird seeing them together again.

-Its like nothing ever happened. -I wouldn´t know.

I know you´re feeling destroyed right now, but I´m here for you.

Why would I be feeling destroyed?

Because you´ve been holding Colin´s place.

He´s back and you´ve got nowhere to stand.

You wasted all that time on Amy.

-It wasn´t for nothing. -Oh, that´s true.

It was like a practice crush.

Now you can focus on liking someone more your speed.

Shut up, Wendell.

[HARRY SINGING THEN SIGHS]

HARRY: Theophilus Thistle, the thistle sifter...

...is sifting a sieveful of unsifted thistles.

Good luck, Dan. Knock them dead, Neil. Break a leg, Alice.

Thanks, Dr. Abbott. You too.

[SINGING]

What are you doing here so early? You´re not slated till 4.

Absolutely not, I signed up for a 3:00 audition.

EDNA: Hmm.

I wrote down 4.

Oh, well. Tough tamales.

[SINGING] Mommy, mommy, mommy, mom

Beautiful, isn´t it?

That´s one of the oldest theaters in Colorado, Delia.

It looks like a picture. You think they have regular toilets?

Why wouldn´t they have regular toilets?

I don´t know, maybe they didn´t have them in the olden days.

If this is the result of home-schooling, I´d reconsider.

I take it you´re auditioning, doctor.

Well, the audition´s merely a formality, but, yes. Yes, I am.

You don´t seem scared at all.

If you or your father were to peruse the one-sheets

outside of the opera house...

...you´d notice there´s not been an Everwood musical...

...in the last six years in which I´ve not played the lead.

I bet you made a great gypsy.

Fear not, doctor, I´m sure Evelyn will find a place...

...for you, perhaps in the chorus.

You´re right, because there´s room in my musical for everyone.

Evelyn, wonderful seeing you.

Harold.

Are my eyes fooling me, or have you lost weight since last year?

-I´ve increased the cardio. -I can tell.

Oh, Evelyn. Oh, Evelyn.

Brenda, you look more radiant every time I see you.

Uh, do you have a sec?

I would love for you to look over my music selection.

-Me too. -I´d love to help you all.

I just need a few moments to settle in, okay?

Excuse me.

ANDY: Evelyn? -Yep.

Listen, Evelyn. Uh, we need to talk.

If you don´t have a song prepared...

...you can sing "Happy Birthday."

You missed your follow-up appointment.

Yes, I did. I´m sorry.

Must have slipped my mind

while I was readying for the auditions.

-Perhaps we can meet later. -We should.

Very well.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

I know you.

Uh, I don´t think so. I´m new here.

You´re Ephram Brown, the kid from New York.

Yeah, that´s me.

Thought so.

You know, I know all about you.

You shouldn´t waste your Google time on me, alright?

-I´m not interesting. -Bright told me about you.

I don´t know, he´s empty as far as brain cells are concerned.

Your dad saved my life.

Excuse me?

Well, I met him a few times in rehab.

He´s the one that did the operation, right?

-That´s what Bright told you? -What everyone told me.

They said he´s some kind of a genius.

Yeah, he likes to thinks so.

Well, you´re cool with me.

It´s nice to meet you, Ephram.

Sure.

Nice meeting you too.

Honestly, doctor, you have done a remarkable job here.

Where were you when I was building the set of Brigadoon?

We could have used you.

-Why don´t you sit down, Evelyn? -Oh, thanks, I´m fine.

Is this your son?

Wow. Why didn´t he audition for us?

Ephram saves his theatrical side for our arguments.

That´s too bad. He´s a handsome guy. Lot like his dad.

So is your beautiful daughter.

By the way, your auditions were topnotch.

Evelyn, I got the results of some of our blood work.

-I´m sorry to tell you-- -I think you´ll be happy...

...with the role I´ve chosen for you.

Really befits your stage presence.

Evelyn, what I´m trying to tell you is--

That I have leukemia?

-You knew? -It´s not an impressive guess.

I´ve battled that dragon before.

I didn´t know that.

Nobody does. At least not in Everwood.

Twelve years ago, I was living in New York.

My career was on its way up...

...I had been cast as a lead opposite Julie Harris...

...in a production at Lincoln Center...

...and I was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia.

Well, needless to say, I didn´t go up in that play.

Instead I moved here with my cousin...

...to finish out the rest of my days in peace.

And then it started to happen.

I started to get really well...

...and before I knew it, I was in full remission.

That´s when my cousin suggested that I join the living...

...and direct the winter musical.

You see, doctor...

...I came here to die and instead...

...I ended up living the best years of my life.

Okay.

So here´s what we´re gonna do now.

We need to get you to an oncologist right away.

They´ll perform a bone-marrow aspiration...

...confirm it´s still myeloid, start you on the chemo.

Meantime, I´ll check with my friends at the Mayo Clinic.

You know, there´s a trial that--

Does Edna know?

No, I haven´t told her. I thought you´d wanna do that.

You mustn´t tell anyone. Promise me.

Of course not.

Yeah.

Well, I should probably go make some phone calls.

You´re gonna be at rehearsal tomorrow, right?

You bet.

You´re gonna be great, you know.

Morning, Edna.

Mighty cold day in hell, sarge.

Well, it´s chilly out, sure, but I´ve seen worse.

I remember one winter in Calgary--

Evelyn flew the coop.

What do you mean?

Went back to New York.

Something about helping her sister move.

Spend more time with her nephew. She left us high and dry.

It´s not like her to do anything like that.

-When did you get this? -I don´t know when she left it.

Found it on my doorstep, this morning.

Why? Do you know anything? Did she say something?

Not a thing, but I´m sure she´ll be back.

Yeah, but she doesn´t say when, she wants me to direct the play.

Obviously, the woman has lost her mind.

Well, I don´t know. I think that´s a great idea.

Are you self-medicating again? I can´t direct a musical.

-Why not? -Because...

...if some person wearing all black asks me...

what´s their motivation I´m liable to smack them.

Come on, Edna, you´d be terrific.

Directing´s all about bossing people around, yelling at them.

Making them do things your way.

Nobody does that better than you.

Nice try, but your sweet talk won´t work with me.

Besides, I boss people without the title.

That´s my point. You know how to take control of a situation.

You´re a born leader. That´s what Evelyn sees.

That´s why she knows you can do it.

I did pick up a few things from my rumble in the jungle.

Maybe they´d apply.

Long as you don´t ask the cast

to make necklaces of ears go with what you got.

And you´ll be there to help me...

...seeing as how she´s cast you as the king of Siam.

The king of what?

She left a script with the note. Congrats.

Do you think we should shave your head or get you a bald cap?

No, no. There´s gotta be some mistake.

The first read-through is this afternoon.

I expect you´ll be prompt.

WENDELL: I wonder what the lunch lady eats for lunch.

Think she eats this, or brown-bag it?

If she brown-bags it she did all the cooking...

...so wouldn´t it be as bad?

-Your thoughts exhaust me. -Imagine what they do to me.

Ephram. I saved you a seat. BOY: Oh, yeah, right.

Uh, it´s okay, I´m just gonna--

What? Sidebar.

Dude, what is wrong with you?

The popular table is beckoning.

-So? -So you can´t say no.

That´d be like saying no to free comics

or to making out with Gwyneth Paltrow.

Such things are simply not done.

Okay. Alright.

Bring me back a souvenir. BOY: Oh, yeah.

You all know Ephram, right? BRIGHT: Sure, we do.

How´s it going, dude?

It´s going good.

How´s it going with you?

Good. Thanks for asking.

Amy, will you scoot over?

You´re, like, suffocating me here.

-Hey, Ephram. -Hi.

Oh, right. You guys obviously know each other.

No, no, not really, I mean--

-Not so much. -You´re both sophomores.

I mean, you must have some classes together.

I rarely attend class.

But he does go on field trips.

I need a soda.

You want something from the vending machines?

I´m good, thanks.

Oh, wait up.

Ephram, do you want anything?

Uh, no, thanks. I´m good.

-Have you memorized it? -No, not yet.

I can´t believe all the scenes we have together.

I bet there´s gonna be some private rehearsals.

Ha, looks like I´ll finally be getting to know you.

[CHUCKLING]

Oh, boy.

I can´t believe you play Anna´s son. It´s not fair.

It´s fair. I have expressive eyes.

But I´m a real boy. You just act like one.

-Deal with it, Arnie. IRV: Here you go, Alice.

HARRY: Evelyn?

IRV: Uh, Harold, hello. Uh, good to see you.

Where is Evelyn? I demand to see her. There has been a mistake.

The script has "chorus-slash-king´s

understudy" written on the front.

That´s not a mistake, Harold.

No, that´s impossible.

Who else would be the--?

Remember, there are no small parts, only small actors.

Whatever idiot coined that phrase...

...was not an understudy

in a community-theater production.

I demand to see Evelyn about this.

Sorry, folks.

Evelyn won´t be here today.

She won´t be here? She´s the director.

That is not entirely the case.

Well, uh...

-...then who´s our director? -You´re looking at her, cupcake.

You, Mother?

Evelyn had a family emergency and requested...

...I serve in her post until she returns.

So listen up, people, and listen good.

Now, you all know my husband, Irv.

He will be operating as my stage manager.

If he sees anyone...

...bringing food or beverage into this establishment...

...he has my full permission...

...to kick some thespian butt.

This includes children.

All right, then.

Let´s everybody turn to page one.

Prepare to commence with the read-through.

Pick you up same time tomorrow, 7:30?

You don´t have to keep driving me to school.

We always came together.

If it´s not out of your way, cool. Seven-thirty´s fine.

It´s gonna all start coming back to you.

We just gotta get into the groove.

Stick with our routine, the way it used to be.

How do you mean?

I mean, with, like, lunch and everything.

We have a pretty set table.

And it´s been the same six people since 8th grade.

If we keep it the same way,

...you´ll have a shot of jarring those memories.

You mean Ephram.

Yeah. Heh.

He´s not like us, Colin. Trust me, I know him.

And I know you. It´s like...

...ketchup and peanut butter. Really bad.

Look, whatever you´ve got against this kid...

...you´re just gonna have to let it go.

I mean, as far as I´m concerned, he´s one of us now.

Let´s just work it out, okay?

Sure. Whatever you say.

[GLASS CLINKING]

For reference, you can ring the doorbell.

It´s effective and less a chance of breaking my window.

I need to talk to you.

And apparently it´s quite urgent.

What exactly is going on between you and Colin?

Why are you being all buddy-buddy with him?

First of all, I´m not being buddy-buddy with anyone.

-Alright? He approached me. -He did? Why? Uh--

I mean, why?

I don´t know. Maybe he thinks I´m pretty.

I´m serious. You must have done something to get his attention.

I don´t think it´s a good idea. Not just for me, for everyone.

It´s nice to know you´re thinking about everybody.

Instead of just yourself.

Excuse me?

Anyway, what´s the big deal?

No big deal, it´s just uncomfortable.

Why?

Whatever.

I have no interest in being your boyfriend´s buddy.

Don´t have anything to worry about.

So you won´t say anything about--?

No.

-I won´t. -Thank you.

That´s all I needed to hear.

Unless, of course, you know, he asks me directly.

Asks you what? What would he ask you?

I don´t know but I´m not gonna lie. I mean, you did kiss me.

You kissed me first.

Don´t worry about it. I´m sure it won´t come up.

-Are you trying to upset me? -Just being honest.

Honestly speaking maybe you and Colin just shouldn´t be friends.

I mean, it´s not like you have anything in common anyways.

No, wait.

No, you´re right. Why would the perfect guy...

...have anything in common with me?

-That´s not what I meant. -That´s Exactly what you meant.

You didn´t mean to say it out loud.

This is hard for me too.

Okay, I wanna be friends with you the way we were.

I really do. But now that Colin´s back in school...

...I mean, you said it yourself, he needs me.

And I--

I´m trying to figure out how to balance all of this, Ephram...

...and I will. It´s just so complicated.

I think you should get going.

Wouldn´t want you to get in any more trouble because of me.

THURMAN: Splendid, Your Majesty.

How many children have you?

Don´t tell me. Wait a minute, I know this one.

Um....

Sixty-seven.

I have 67 children.

-How long do I have to have-- -Could you focus with me?

-Did I say the line right? -No, not really.

The line was, "I have only 67 altogether."

You´re not even looking at the script.

I know it already.

We´ve done this a hundred times.

I was close. You don´t have to get so nitpicky about it.

-But you said earlier-- -Look, forget what I said, okay?

Let´s assume that if I´m in the ballpark...

...it´s good enough, alright? Okay.

Now, let´s skip ahead to the next one.

Okay.

A missionary taught you English?

"Yes, sir." "Missionary."

-That´s your cue. -I have a line there?

-You do. -Let me see that.

You´ve been rehearsing for weeks.

Shouldn´t you know your lines?

You wanna wear this cast forever?

-I need more plaster. -Storage.

How´s it going on those lines, sarge?

Oh, great. Just really, really great.

I have altogether, 42 children?

-Ready for lunch, honey? -Lunch?

Who has time for lunch?

I´ve got blocking to finish. Look.

I got Lady Thiang exiting downstage left as Tuptim enters.

It´s a collision waiting to happen.

You should take a break. You seem stressed out lately.

Why would I be stressed out? The play goes up in three days.

I have seven dances to choreograph.

I´ve got a lead who can´t remember his lines.

And I´ve got a stage manager

who apparently thinks he´s on vacation.

Yo, E, what´s up?

E? I´m E now?

-Hi, Ephram. BOY: Yo, E, what´s up?

Hello.

Why does everybody know my name?

In case you haven´t noticed, you´re the new "it" boy.

-Why? I haven´t done anything. -You´ve been Colin-approved.

When the most popular guy takes you under his wing...

...it´s like you´re automatically accepted.

He likes me because of my dad.

Who cares why he likes you? Nepotism is beautiful, E.

-Embrace it. -Don´t ever call me E again.

BOY: Hey, E.

I already have a plan.

You are part of the plan.

What is good in Western culture--

I could drive a train through those gaps, Brown. Speed it up.

What is good in Western culture--

I already have a plan.

Already I have bring printing press here for printing.

What he said.

Yes, I know, Your Majesty, but there´s the--

EDNA: Cut. Just cut. BRENDA: What--?

If I could just stay on-book a little while longer--

Where the hell is my stage manager?

How long does it take for a latte run?

Perhaps he fled the country.

Wise man.

From the top, faster.

[ANDY CLEARS THROAT]

You are schoolteacher?

Yes, When do I start my work?

I´ll tell you when I wish you to start.

There´s a matter we must-- This is ridiculous.

They don´t talk this fast on West Wing.

-Thats it. Drop and give me 20. -Oh, not again.

Hit the deck, Baxworth.

-I miss Evelyn. -You say something, Alice?

-Sir, no, sir. -For heaven´s sake, Mother.

This is a theater, not a battlefield...

...and there are ways to address an actor

during the rehearsal process.

Even a God-awful actor like Dr. Brown deserves encouragement.

Directing requires precision and creativity.

Inspiration and heart.

Evelyn Rowser possesses all of those qualities.

And she´s nice to us.

And she doesn´t make us do pushups.

I got an idea.

-Cue cards. HARRY: Mother, we´re fed up.

This is not boot camp. We do not want to be treated like--

[WHISTLES]

Alright, everybody, listen up.

Either we do this my way or not at all.

Anybody who doesn´t like it can leave right now.

I´m out of here.

Good luck, Mother.

-Listen, Edna-- -Forget it, doc.

Leave me alone.

COACH: Let´s get a game going. Bright and Ted, you´re captains.

Ted, you´re first.

Dema.

BRIGHT: Ephram Brown.

Ephram.

Dude, I picked you.

-Why? COACH: Move it, Ephram. Come on.

TED: Todd.

-What are you doing? -Picking my team.

-Alex. -But you hate me.

No, I don´t.

-I like you. TED: Kurt.

-Since when? -I´ve always been fond of you.

I´m just-- I´m shy.

You know. Al.

Name one thing you like about me.

Just one? How about a thousand? You´re, uh, sensitive.

Extremely clean.

Look, Bright, I know you hate me, alright? I´m fine.

It means the planets are aligned...

...let´s not mess with the universe, okay?

You wanna pick the next guy?

[SINGING] ♫ Whenever I feel afraid ♫

♫ I hold my head erect ♫

♫ And whistle a happy tune ♫

♫ So no one will suspect ♫

WOMAN: Wake up. MAN: Louder.

♫ I´m afraid ♫

[AUDIENCE JEERING]

[BLOWING]

That´s not whistling, that´s blowing.

Yeah...

...I don´t think so.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Dr. Brown.

I wasn´t expecting to see you again until Friday.

Come in.

Would you like some tea, doctor? I´m having some.

No, no, thanks.

I was checking in...

...to see how everything worked out with the Mayo Clinic.

Well, I´m going to Minnesota next Monday.

I appreciate all your string-pulling.

I´m happy to help.

I feel as though I haven´t done enough these past few weeks.

What more could you do?

So, what are you really here for?

You still having trouble with your lines?

I think you should tell them, Evelyn.

These people care. If they knew what you were going through...

-...they would-- -They´d what?

What, they´d all come trotting by...

...with their tins of baked goods?

No, thank you. I prefer my solitude.

There´s a certain dignity to it.

-Don´t you agree? -No, I don´t.

There´s no reason why you should have to go through this alone.

Especially when it´s so unnecessary.

Listen, I have seen people in your position...

...who had no friends or family who were forced...

...to go through the pain and the loneliness of sickness...

...but you are choosing it and I don´t understand that.

It´s okay to let them see that you´re human.

Excuse me?

Look, I know what it´s like.

People think of you as this god. They worship you to the point...

...where they turn you into something that you can´t ever

really be, that you shouldn´t have to be.

You don´t have to be perfect, Evelyn.

You can be sick. They´ll still love you.

In fact, they´ll probably love you even more for it.

I appreciate the sentiment...

...but these people need me to be their hero

and I love playing the role. I´m sorry you didn´t enjoy...

the adoration of the masses, but I do.

Where´s the harm?

In the end, everybody gets what they want.

What if you don´t get better?

Then what?

Then everybody will get what they´ve always had.

An idea of me.

Well, Edna´s your friend.

And she´s working her ass off right now trying to be you...

...when she has no idea that it´s all smoke and mirrors.

Is that fair?

There are lots of things in life that aren´t fair, darling.

And you of all people should know that.

Hey, Ephram, you want a ride?

Uh, no, I´m okay. I´m just gonna ride my bike.

We can put it in back, man. Just hop in.

No, I´m fine, really.

Maybe he wants to ride his bike, Colin.

COLIN: Why would he wanna do that?

Come on, we can make room. Amy can sit in my lap--

Yeah, I don´t need a ride, okay?

I don´t need to sit at your tables or play on your teams

-Dude, what is your problem? -You´re my problem.

My dad helped you. If you wanna thank him, be my guest.

I had nothing to do with it so leave me alone.

Believe it I have no interest in being your charity case.

-It´s not like that, man. -Yeah, it is.

Trust me. You and I?

We have nothing in common. If you want, go back to how it was.

You ignore me, and I´ll be more than happy to do the same.

Okay?

All of you.

Tried to tell you, man. He´s a whack-job.

COLIN: Amy, get in the truck.

I don´t suppose you serve margaritas.

Evelyn?

I´ll have what she´s having, please.

I thought you were in New York.

-Your note said you had gone-- -About the note.

It´s full of bull.

-I´m a fantastic liar. -Well, the joke´s on you.

Because it turns out I´m a lousy director.

I single-handedly ruined your musical.

I´m sure it´s safe to assume that you did not...

...single-handedly ruin anything.

In fact, I´m certain that you had help...

...in the destruction of Siam.

The truth is...

...I tried.

I just couldn´t do it.

I´m not you, Evelyn.

No. No, you most certainly are not.

You´re better.

You´re real, Edna.

Real people make mistakes.

They fall down in the world...

...and they pick themselves up, bloodied knees and all.

I just wanted it to be perfect, you know?

I didn´t pick you to direct my play...

...because I thought you were gonna be perfect.

In fact, I chose you because I knew you wouldn´t be...

...and that you wouldn´t let it stop you.

I heard that I made a teeny-weeny casting faux pas.

Oh, boy.

-So you wouldn´t mind if I--? -Darling.

The play is yours.

Do with it what you wish.

You probably shouldn´t drink that.

Well, nobody´s perfect.

Well, looks normal to me, sweetheart.

What exactly is it that´s bothering you?

Is it a sore throat, tummy ache?

Let´s see. I´ve been having hot flashes...

...insomnia and osteorosis.

Hmm, that does sound serious.

I thought so too, and I might even be contagious.

I probably shouldn´t be around people for a while.

Well...

...menopause isn´t normally contagious, honey.

But then again, it´s also rare for it to occur...

...in 9-year-old girls.

Guess there´s a first time for everything.

Well, I guess we´ll have to get you to a hospital.

Take some blood tests, run a few CAT scans.

Blood tests?

Like with needles?

-Oh, yeah, big ones. -Dad.

Maybe I don´t have menopause.

Oh, really? Something else, then?

Maybe I just don´t wanna do the play anymore.

Why, sweetheart?

Because what if I stink?

Then all those people will boo at me.

If they´re gonna boo at anybody

it´ll be the guy who can´t remember his lines.

Trust me, you´re not gonna stink.

Maybe I won´t stink as bad as you, but even still...

...I could forget everything, even how to sing.

You remember when Uncle Brian was here...

...and I had to do brain surgery again

and I hadn´t done it in a long time?

I was scared.

-You were? -I was terrified.

I thought I was gonna forget how to do everything.

I woke up that morning and I thought:

" There´s no way. I can´t do this."

You seemed okay to me.

Yeah, well, that´s what I wanted you to think...

...but I was faking.

I pretended that I was okay when deep down I was really afraid.

Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital room...

...doing brain surgery, and you know what?

I got so good at pretending to be fine...

...that I actually was.

It´s called "fake it till you make it."

-Like my song says. -What song?

-In the play. -Oh, yeah.

Fake it till you make it.

-I can do that. -I know you can.

Your mom would be so proud of you.

-Really? -Really.

-Goodnight, sweetheart. -Goodnight, Dad.

ANDY: You really think I´m gonna stink?

Can I talk to you?

I thought we already finished this.

Not exactly.

I lied to you, Ephram.

I acted like the reason I was gonna be your friend

was because of your dad but it´s not.

It´s something else.

Alright.

Let´s hear it.

I don´t know you...

...but more importantly is you don´t know me.

You´re the only person in this school...

...who doesn´t expect me to remember them...

...or expect me to be this guy

that I don´t even know who he was.

You know, I´m trying to please all these people

but it´s wearing me out, man.

I can understand that.

It´s different with you because you don´t have any expectations.

I don´t have to feel guilty for not knowing you.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

You see, in a way, I mean...

...you know, we´re both new.

And you look about as out of place as I feel...

...which is probably why I approached you...

...but what I don´t get is, um, why you don´t like me.

Who said I didn´t like you?

Well, it´s obvious you don´t like hanging around me.

Is there a reason?

No.

No reason.

We´re cool.

Cool.

So let´s talk about this E thing.

Who came up with that?

COLIN: Probably Bright.

EPHRAM: Bright?

Hello, everyone.

Okay, then.

You look nice today, Baxworth.

-I do? -Yeah.

Radiant.

Well, thank you, Edna.

-And, Alice? -Sir, yes, sir.

You make a fine Tuptim.

I like what you´ve done with the part.

I should have told you that before.

I´m sorry if I haven´t been very--

Nice?

Encouraging.

Private.

I don´t think I have to tell you what great work you´re doing.

You really have me convinced you´re a boy on that stage...

...and it freaks me out.

-Thanks, Edna. -And, Dr. Brown?

Yes?

-You´re fired. -I´m what?

An executive decision had to be made.

I´d appreciate it if you´d turn in your papers and exit...

...without too much of a fuss.

But I was making so much progress.

How many children does Your Majesty have?

Thirty...

...seven?

-Junior. -Six.

How do you feel about playing the king of Siam?

Who´s offering?

-I am. -Gee, Mother, I don´t know.

Spielberg´s heard of my work as the understudy. We´re in talks.

Come on, Junior.

The play needs you.

Well, I suppose the show must go on.

Wouldn´t want to let down Everwood´s

theatergoing community.

Alright, people...

...swallow that last bite of crumb cake.

We´ve got a dress rehearsal to get on.

ALICE: Come on. ANDY: Let´s do it.

[CROWD CHATTERING]

EPHRAM: Delia was never in Romeo and Juliet.

She was not the girl in Sleepless in Seattle.

She wasn´t born when that came out.

Hey, if you´re gonna dream, dream big.

-Dr. Brown? -Hey, Colin. How you feeling?

Pretty good.

I know my parents have sent you enough gift baskets...

...to last a lifetimebut, um...

...I guess I wanted to come by and thank you myself.

Keep doing what you´re doing. That´s all the thanks I need.

Hey, Ephram, do you wanna come sit with us?

We saved a few extra seats.

Oh, no, thanks. Just gonna chill here with my dad.

-Okay. -Catch you later.

ANDY: You two friends now? EPHRAM: Kind of.

Turns out we have some stuff in common.

-You mean Amy? -Surprisingly...

...it has nothing to do with Amy.

-Why don´t you go sit with them? -Because of Amy.

-So who´s this Evelyn Rowser? -Why do you ask?

Well, I don´t know.

The play´s dedicated to her. Is she famous?

I guess you could say she´s a legend around here.

She the reason you got fired?

I didn´t get fired. I chose to step down.

Artistic differences.

[EPHRAM SCOFFS]

-Dad? -Mm-hm?

It´s nice to know you´re not awesome at everything.

[CREW CHATTERING]

EDNA: Alright, troops, fall in.

She means form a line, morons.

I´ll make this brief because we´ve got civilians...

...waiting to be entertained.

You´ve all worked hard.

You´ve worked long.

You´ve struggled against formidable odds...

...to get where you are tonight.

I´d be proud to lead you into battle anytime, anyplace.

That´s all.

Go get them, soldiers...

...and good luck.

I thought it was bad luck to say good luck.

It is, but let´s not tell her that.

Uh, places, everybody.

IRV: Evelyn Rowser had an expression...

...for the few seconds before the curtain went up.

She called it "the holy time."

You don´t have to be an actor to know

what the holy time feels like.

It´s that breath you take...

...just seconds before you become the person

you´re meant to become.

For some people, it feels like forever...

...and for some...

...it´s a moment over far too fast.