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If we find any IEDs in this compound, we'll kill the men, rape the
women, enslave the children, steal everything and burn the compound to the
ground.
You two are fucking... Shut up!
You know I'm not into big tits and pouty lips. I like Asians, flat ass, small
hands, foot job.
You know me better than that. I don't fuck my subordinate.
I certainly hope not, Sergeant. Christmas Christ!
Sir, we need some identification, and we heard a woman screaming earlier.
A woman?
No, there is no woman here.
I wish you both a good night.
Good night, sir.
I want to destroy that guy.
Perhaps by strangling him in a tub of ice water?
Watching the bubbles escape his right mouth.
Okay, buddy. Ma 'am, what's that on your arm?
He's got photos of us.
Why are we all over his wall?
Please don't take this the wrong way because you're heavier than I thought.
Check this shit out.
That's nice, right? I was thinking Currier or Ariel, but I didn't want to
confuse anyone. I just did Times New Roman.
Simple, right?
Hello, miss.
Hi. What can I help you officers with?
Well, we're here to protect.
And serve. And serve.
Do I have them?
Locked. Great. That's fucking great.
Just... Protein.
Maybe I could... Maybe I could just be... Hold on
just one second. Very important call.
I'll just be... I'll just be sitting.
Maybe I could...
World's best second lieutenant.
Hello. We were told to speak to you about today's demonstration.
Yes.
Indeed.
Being that today is the first demonstration of this nature, I'd like
as informative as possible.
Okay. Which is, that being said, I have color copied.
Some pamphlets I'd like everyone to read during the detail.
And if you'd like to just peruse that at your convenience.
And you can keep that.
Sir, we have an entire curriculum from the Department of Homeland Security
be following today.
Wow. Okay.
Yeah, we got it all taken care of. Can you point us in the direction of the
briefing and demonstration location?
Yeah.
We'll be briefing in room 204.
Did you need to write that?
No? Okay.
And then, of course, we'll be doing a demonstration in the adjacent hallway.
Just, if you were Superman and could see through the wall, I mean, that's the
hallway. Also, the main office, which is larger than this one.
Thank you.
Yeah, yeah, and if you need anything, just... Oh, actually, we could
use your help. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely, yeah, I can, yes. We have a
of gear.
You could help us with that.
I'll do that.
Oh, I think he must have forgot this on accident.
I'll give it back to you.
Oh, hey, guys, I think you forgot this. I saw you drop it. I don't know if that
was an accident. I'm sure it definitely... Oh, yeah, let me get...
Oh,
Sergeant Butts.
Yes, sir. Could we talk, please?
Yes, sir. Could you assist the local PD with their training gear for today's
exercises?
Of course, sir.
Oh, and one more thing.
I'm sorry I forgot to give this to you the other day, but I want you to know I
appreciate all your hard work.
Thank you, sir.
Where'd those cops go?
So, do they use real guns?
Nah, they're just, like, simulated crisis actors.
Move it, bud! I'm not teaching you how to defend yourself!
Lawrence?
Lawrence?
He knows.
No, I'm good.
Nope. Bridges gave this to me.
He knows we're in his office.
Shit. I told you.
Hey, don't put this on me. We're in this together.
You're the one that stole his fit wrap. I know.
Fuck. There's no way this isn't happening. come back on us.
Look at him. He's dead.
Baby doll eyes.
He's got like thin mummy lips.
He's totally plotting something.
That's okay.
Because I have something up my sleeve too.
Dickhead.
Okay, everyone. We have two very special officers here.
Can I please have your undivided attention?
This is important stuff.
Thank
you.
I'll have to learn how you did that later.
Okay, everyone. We have two very special officers from the local PD who will be
giving us a period of instructions on active shooters.
And I expect you all to be taking notes and actively participating in whatever
they want us to do.
Anything you want.
Thank you. Yep.
Thank you. Yep.
All right. I'm Officer Bishop. This is Officer Dick Ward. We're here today to
provide you with the knowledge and training you need if you ever encounter
active shooter. Now, usually these courses are designed for schools and
businesses, but...
Having known this command for the past year, I am not surprised we're here
today.
Yeah, I am about to go straight up Columbine in this place.
Klebold? Harris, I got your back.
Hey! Pay attention!
Some of us have gone through the proper training to save lives on a regular
basis. That's right.
Good one.
Alright, can you get over there?
Alright, thank you. Let's get started.
With what an active shooter is, can anyone in here tell me what an active
shooter really is?
An individual engaging in killing... Can we please let the trainees answer?
Individuals engaged in killing students, Muslims, and government employees.
Nailed it. What?
No.
Fuck.
We're engaged in killing other humans in confined, usually heavily populated
areas. Now, being that this military base is a heavily populated area, it
not surprise me that a...
Guarded military base such as this one can be infiltrated and attacked.
Officer Dickward.
Thank you, Officer Bishop.
The floor is yours.
Thank you.
There are three simple things we can all do during today's demonstration and in
future life -threatening situations to combat an active shooter.
Run.
Hide. Fight.
If you have an opportunity to get out, do it.
and encourage others to follow you. Bring friends.
But do not allow them to slow you down with indecision.
Indecision results in death.
Write that down.
That's right. And once you're out of the line of fire, try to prevent others
from entering the danger zone.
That brings us to our second tip.
Hide. Sergeant Bud!
You know all about hiding. What are some of the best places to hide?
I don't know.
Under a table.
Sergeant Butts, this is not an earthquake drill. Under a table ain't
cut it.
What about playing possum or hiding behind a person who's already been shot,
like a human shield?
Oh, yeah.
We strongly advise you not to do any of those things, son.
No. Okay?
Now. As a last resort, if your life is at risk, whether you're alone or working
as a group, fight.
Act with aggression.
Improvise weapons.
Disarm him or her and commit to taking them down.
That's right. Now, this one might be tough for some of you, but if you get
opportunity to fight, take it.
All right.
Great. Okay, can you hand out the emergency evacuation plan, please?
Can you hand it out, please, to everyone?
Thank you.
We need you to hand it out. Thank you.
All right.
So we've got a few actors helping us out today from our local theater department
at Webster University.
They'll be simulating our shooters. If you encounter them during today's drill,
remember this period of instruction.
Good luck.
Hoo -ah!
That's army for good luck.
You should write that down, maybe.
That's what you're not doing.
Bang, bang, motherfucker.
Hey, guys. Let me in. It's boss.
It's boss.
It's B -U -T -T -S. God damn it.
Oh, let me in.
Please. It's butts.
Let me in, you
cock faggots.
Fuck.
Oh, shit.
Fuck.
Hey, guys.
It's fake, right?
Oh, my God. He shit himself.
Oh, God.
Damn.
All right.
Oh, you got one? Huh?
But you're dead and your fat ass is blocking the hallway. So get the hell
here till we're done.
Let's go.
Greasy piece of shit.
Don't you fucking dare.
Bald piece of shit.
Oh,
may I? I just want to do the knock -in this time.
Dead, soldier.
Don't touch me again.
That was a good team.
You're not on our team.
How old are you, though?
Oh, hey, cum dumpster.
I got a question for you.
I bet you think you're pretty fucking cool, huh?
What?
Walking around here, shooting people with your silly little gun.
I got news for you, tough guy.
Stings like a bitch.
This is not a test.
Dickhead.
All right.
So, I'm not going to say that you guys did bad.
No, that was pretty bad, actually. That was awful.
That was terrible.
To my right are your friends and colleagues whose lives you could have
you paid more attention.
Oh, shit. What are you fucking thinking?
Fuck. Wait, wait, wait.
Slide them over.
Now.
Right now.
Did you just get the guts?
Why would you get the guts?
You two stand up.
Get up right now.
Hey, I can fucking see you. Come out now.
Nice and slow.
Holy, holy oxen free, everybody.
Get in line. Go on. Go on. There you go.
I'm going to waste some of these motherfuckers.
Hey, honey.
How was your day at work?
Good? Your boss still hitting on you?
You want me to go down there and kick his ass for you, baby?
Yeah, I'm a tough guy.
Oh, I'm so tough.
Lawrence!
Dean!
If you don't come out right now, I'm going to smoke this bitch.
In three?
Hey, Williams.
Dang, buddy.
Hey, buddy, I need you to know that it's not your fault.
Okay? What?
Give me your thumb.
It's not your fault.
It's not your fault.
Of course it's not my fault, you dumb motherfucker.
It's your fault.
It is both of your faults. So get the fuck over there.
All right, who's next?
How about you?
Yeah, come here. It's going to be you.
Come here.
Hey, look, buddy.
Don't fucking kill me.
Don't fucking kill me. Please.
I'll let you fuck me. I'll let you fuck me. Just don't shoot me.
Oh, please.
This is a safe place, Williams.
Okay? And we can work on whatever issues that you're going through. Okay?
And I can help you.
All right? But you have to help me help you.
Help me help you.
All right?
We build bridges here, not walls, okay?
I'll just put it back, huh?
But just put your guns down, all right? This is a sanctuary, all right?
And I'm not going to let you or anyone else be harmed, all right?
Oh, fuck!
Lawrence! What the hell?
How does he know me?
Lawrence?
Yeah?
Someone got away.
What? When we did the drug bust, I came to back you up. Someone got away. I'm so
sorry. I don't know. I just got caught up in the middle of things and...
No, Lawrence, don't.
When I leave, lock the door behind me.
Got it?
Got it?
Whoa, hey.
Williams?
Come on, man. You don't have to do any of this, all right?
Put the gun down. We can talk this out.
You're a good man.
Zach was a good man.
All he wanted was to be squared away.
He was a good man, wasn't he?
He wouldn't have wanted any of this.
Come on, look, look.
We can still pick this, all right?
You and me.
Look, I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you.
I wasn't there for you or your brother.
Okay? You know, I was just... You were too fucking busy, weren't you?
Hey, you could have helped your brother too.
Okay?
You... You were selfish.
And you didn't do anything.
All right?
Killing us will not bring him back. I promise you that.
Hey buddy stay with them all right normal breaths, you'll be all right move
All right, I need to take normal breath
you're cool. You're gonna be fine
You're going to be fine, buddy. All right. No, no breaths. Don't freak out.
look at me. Hey, hey, look at me, bud.
Don't close your eyes.
Don't close your eyes.
Fuck.
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