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1
00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:08,590
Yes... yes.
2
00:00:08,590 --> 00:00:12,100
"If you can conceive it,
you can achieve it."
3
00:00:12,100 --> 00:00:15,100
Oh... that is so true.
4
00:00:15,100 --> 00:00:16,100
Fay, don't worry.
5
00:00:16,100 --> 00:00:17,600
Your hair looks fine.
6
00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:18,600
Oh, really?
7
00:00:18,600 --> 00:00:21,100
You don't think it looks
a little matronly?
8
00:00:21,100 --> 00:00:23,610
Oh, would you stop
being so insecure?
9
00:00:23,610 --> 00:00:24,610
Oh. Uh, Antonio...
10
00:00:24,610 --> 00:00:27,610
do you think my hair
looks a little drab?
11
00:00:27,610 --> 00:00:30,610
Yes, yes... of course.
12
00:00:30,610 --> 00:00:32,120
Oh, thanks.
13
00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:34,120
Ever heard of a little something
called tact?
14
00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:36,620
Morning, Scarpacci.
15
00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:37,620
Of course.
16
00:00:37,620 --> 00:00:40,120
I am the one who
determines my own fate.
17
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,130
Oh, no,
you're not listening
18
00:00:42,130 --> 00:00:43,130
to one of those moronic,
19
00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:45,130
self-improvement
tapes, are you?
20
00:00:45,130 --> 00:00:48,630
Yes, yes...
I am the one.
21
00:00:48,630 --> 00:00:50,130
Oh, you're the one,
all right.
22
00:00:50,130 --> 00:00:52,140
Hey, Scarpacci. Hey.
23
00:00:52,140 --> 00:00:53,640
Oh, oh, sorry, Roy.
24
00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:55,140
I was just listening
to one of those wonderful
25
00:00:55,140 --> 00:00:57,640
self-improvement tapes.
26
00:00:57,640 --> 00:01:01,140
It's called Life: Grab It,
It's Yours, by John Gold.
27
00:01:01,140 --> 00:01:04,150
Four tapes, only $495.
28
00:01:05,650 --> 00:01:08,650
My days of being
taken advantage of are over.
29
00:01:09,150 --> 00:01:11,150
Scarpacci, how can you
waste your money
30
00:01:11,150 --> 00:01:13,660
on those late-night
infomercial things?
31
00:01:13,660 --> 00:01:15,160
None of that stuff works.
32
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:16,660
How do you know?
33
00:01:16,660 --> 00:01:20,160
Hey... do these look
like buns of steel?
34
00:01:29,670 --> 00:01:31,170
HELEN:
Casey, wait.
35
00:01:31,170 --> 00:01:32,680
What's different
about you?
36
00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:34,180
You look so...
37
00:01:35,180 --> 00:01:36,680
...employed.
38
00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:38,180
Don't I?
39
00:01:38,180 --> 00:01:40,680
And as Nantucket's new
assistant director of tourism,
40
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:42,190
I've already come up
with a great idea.
41
00:01:42,190 --> 00:01:44,190
You know, I figure, if you
want to attract tourists,
42
00:01:44,190 --> 00:01:46,190
you have to come up
with a catchy slogan.
43
00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:47,690
You know, like
"I love New York"
44
00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:49,190
or "Virginia
is for lovers."
45
00:01:49,190 --> 00:01:52,200
Well, check this out.
46
00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:54,200
"Welcome to Nantucket:
47
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:57,700
"Approximately
56 square miles of smiles
48
00:01:57,700 --> 00:02:01,200
which you'll enjoy,
especially in summer."
49
00:02:02,210 --> 00:02:03,210
Kind of...
50
00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:05,710
Kind of rolls
right off the tongue.
51
00:02:05,710 --> 00:02:08,710
And just keeps
on rolling.
52
00:02:08,710 --> 00:02:10,710
Wish me luck-- I'm presenting
it this afternoon.
53
00:02:10,710 --> 00:02:13,220
And probably
well into the evening.
54
00:02:15,220 --> 00:02:18,220
Hey, Helen,
I got the plans.
55
00:02:18,220 --> 00:02:20,220
(as Boris Badenov):
Plans? Good, Natasha.
56
00:02:20,220 --> 00:02:24,230
Now we can finally get rid
of Moose and Squirrel.
57
00:02:25,230 --> 00:02:26,230
Okay, come on, Joe.
58
00:02:26,230 --> 00:02:27,730
Can't wait to
see the house.
59
00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:30,230
Yeah, here they are,
look at this. Huh?
Here we go.
60
00:02:30,230 --> 00:02:31,230
Look at that.
Oh...
61
00:02:31,230 --> 00:02:32,740
(gasps)
Wow.
62
00:02:32,740 --> 00:02:35,240
It's just beautiful.
63
00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,740
See, we didn't need
some world-famous architect.
64
00:02:37,740 --> 00:02:39,240
All we needed was someone young
and hungry.
65
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:41,240
Yeah, that's right, who cares
if he's the day manager
66
00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:43,250
of a Baskin-Robbins?
67
00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:45,250
Listen, maybe if you pay him
a little extra
68
00:02:45,250 --> 00:02:47,250
he'll put sprinkles on the roof.
69
00:02:51,750 --> 00:02:53,760
Oh, look,
here's our living room
70
00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:54,760
with a window seat.
71
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,260
It's exactly
how I imagined it...
72
00:02:56,260 --> 00:02:58,260
And our kitchen
73
00:02:58,260 --> 00:02:59,760
with a butcher block
counter.
74
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:00,760
Look at this.
This is the best part.
75
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,270
Remember that big closet
in our bedroom?
76
00:03:02,770 --> 00:03:03,770
My walk-in closet.
77
00:03:03,770 --> 00:03:05,270
Right, well, by
eliminating it,
78
00:03:05,270 --> 00:03:07,770
the architect says
we'll have enough room
79
00:03:07,770 --> 00:03:09,270
to build a cabinet
80
00:03:09,270 --> 00:03:11,780
that will hold a 60-inch TV.
81
00:03:11,770 --> 00:03:13,780
Whoa, 60 inches!
82
00:03:13,780 --> 00:03:15,280
Super Bowl--
Joe's house.
83
00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:16,280
Super Bowl?
84
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:18,280
What about Monday Night
Football once a week?
85
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:20,780
Hey, hey, hey, guys, guys,
you're forgetting something.
86
00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:23,290
There are games on
Saturday and Sunday, too!
87
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:25,790
(hooting and laughing)
88
00:03:25,790 --> 00:03:26,790
(quietly):
I don't... I don't
think I want
89
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:28,790
a 60-inch TV
in the bedroom.
90
00:03:28,790 --> 00:03:30,290
What did she say?
91
00:03:30,790 --> 00:03:32,800
She said she doesn't
want the big TV.
92
00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,300
Helen, you don't understand.
93
00:03:34,300 --> 00:03:35,800
The beautiful part of this
94
00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:39,300
is that there'll be
a decent closet and a big TV.
95
00:03:39,300 --> 00:03:41,300
No, but I had my heart
set on a walk-in closet.
96
00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:42,810
What did she say?
97
00:03:42,810 --> 00:03:45,310
She said she wants
the walk-in.
98
00:03:45,310 --> 00:03:46,810
If you just look
at the plans,
99
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:48,310
I think
you'll appreciate
100
00:03:48,310 --> 00:03:49,810
what the architect
and I did here.
101
00:03:50,310 --> 00:03:51,310
What?
102
00:03:51,310 --> 00:03:53,320
You went to
the architect
103
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,320
and made changes
without me?
104
00:03:55,820 --> 00:03:57,320
How could you do that?
105
00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:58,320
What did she say?
106
00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,320
What, am I speaking
German here?
107
00:04:02,330 --> 00:04:03,830
Don't you guys have
something better to do?
108
00:04:03,830 --> 00:04:05,830
Well, you heard that,
didn't you?
109
00:04:05,830 --> 00:04:07,330
Yeah, but I'm not going
there every Monday night
110
00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:10,330
just to look
at a closet.
111
00:04:10,330 --> 00:04:11,840
I can't believe
you would make
112
00:04:11,830 --> 00:04:13,840
that important of a
decision without me.
113
00:04:14,340 --> 00:04:15,340
What decision?
114
00:04:15,340 --> 00:04:16,840
A big TV versus
a stupid closet?
115
00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:17,840
It's a no-brainer.
116
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:19,340
You got that right.
117
00:04:19,340 --> 00:04:20,340
First thing
in the morning
118
00:04:20,340 --> 00:04:21,850
we are flying to Boston
119
00:04:21,840 --> 00:04:24,350
and we're going to tell that
architect to put it back.
120
00:04:24,350 --> 00:04:25,850
Oh, so now you're making
all the decisions?
121
00:04:26,350 --> 00:04:27,350
Yep. See how it feels?
122
00:04:27,850 --> 00:04:29,350
Well, you know what,
I'm not giving up my TV.
123
00:04:29,350 --> 00:04:32,360
Well, too bad, because
I want my closet.
124
00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:37,860
Oh, look, the plans
for your new house.
125
00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:39,360
A little love nest.
126
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,360
Oh, it's so romantic.
127
00:04:41,860 --> 00:04:42,870
How I envy you two.
128
00:04:43,370 --> 00:04:44,370
This isn't over.
129
00:04:44,370 --> 00:04:45,870
Not by a
long shot.
130
00:04:47,870 --> 00:04:49,870
They're headed for court.
131
00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:01,380
Helen, what are you doing?
132
00:05:01,380 --> 00:05:04,390
Trying to find my black dress
that I'm wearing tomorrow.
133
00:05:04,390 --> 00:05:05,890
But it's really hard to find
134
00:05:05,890 --> 00:05:08,390
in this teeny, tiny closet
that the two of us are sharing.
135
00:05:09,390 --> 00:05:11,900
Well, keep it down, would you?
136
00:05:11,890 --> 00:05:15,400
I'm trying to watch Jurassic
Park on my five-inch TV.
137
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:18,900
Ooh, scary.
138
00:05:18,900 --> 00:05:21,400
It's just like
being in the theater.
139
00:05:21,900 --> 00:05:23,910
Here it is.
140
00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:40,420
Will you turn
that thing off?
141
00:05:40,420 --> 00:05:41,930
I want to go to bed.
142
00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:43,430
You know,
I just don't understand
143
00:05:43,430 --> 00:05:44,930
why you are so mad at me.
I don't want to
talk about it.
144
00:05:44,930 --> 00:05:47,430
All I did...
I'm tired.
145
00:05:47,430 --> 00:05:50,430
All right, okay,
fine, I give up, okay?
146
00:05:50,430 --> 00:05:51,940
You can have your closet,
all right?
147
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:53,440
Tomorrow,
we'll fly to Boston.
148
00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:54,940
We'll tell the architect
to put it back in.
149
00:05:54,940 --> 00:05:56,440
There, are you happy?
150
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:59,440
You just don't
get it, do you?
151
00:06:00,940 --> 00:06:01,940
Well, let me see.
152
00:06:02,450 --> 00:06:04,950
You're getting your own way,
and you're still mad at me.
153
00:06:05,450 --> 00:06:06,450
No, I guess I don't.
154
00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:08,950
Okay, let me give you
a hypothetical situation.
155
00:06:09,450 --> 00:06:11,450
Oh, no, no, not a hypothetical,
I hate those.
156
00:06:11,450 --> 00:06:12,960
Let's just say,
for argument's sake,
157
00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:15,960
that I am in a coma.
158
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:20,460
Okay, I'm listening.
159
00:06:20,460 --> 00:06:21,970
Okay, so I'm
in this coma...
160
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:25,470
How did you get
in this coma, anyway?
161
00:06:25,470 --> 00:06:27,970
A big TV fell on me.
What's the difference?
162
00:06:30,470 --> 00:06:32,480
All right, we are
right in the middle
163
00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:34,480
of choosing colors
for our bathroom
164
00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:37,480
and we have narrowed it
down to Buttercup Yellow
165
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,980
or Robin's Egg Blue.
166
00:06:39,980 --> 00:06:41,980
The decorator
is pressing you
167
00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:43,490
to give her an
answer today.
168
00:06:43,990 --> 00:06:45,490
What kind
of a decorator is this?
169
00:06:45,490 --> 00:06:47,490
You're in a coma.
170
00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,990
She can't stop for
every coma, Joe.
171
00:06:49,990 --> 00:06:53,500
She needs an
answer today.
172
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,500
Okay, um... Buttercup?
173
00:06:55,500 --> 00:06:57,000
I can't believe
you said... Oh!
174
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,000
No, Robin's Egg,
Robin's Egg!
175
00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,500
I pick Robin's Egg.
I can't believe
176
00:06:59,500 --> 00:07:01,500
that you would make
a decision without me!
177
00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:03,010
But you're in a coma.
Well, you don't know
178
00:07:03,010 --> 00:07:05,010
how long I'm going
to be in that coma.
179
00:07:05,010 --> 00:07:08,510
I could snap out
like that.
180
00:07:08,510 --> 00:07:12,020
Don't you think that's
what I'm praying for?
181
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:19,020
Okay... forget
about the coma.
182
00:07:19,020 --> 00:07:21,020
The point is, is
you did it again.
183
00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:22,530
Did what?
184
00:07:22,530 --> 00:07:24,530
You made another
decision without me.
Oh...
185
00:07:24,530 --> 00:07:27,030
That's it, forget it.
186
00:07:28,530 --> 00:07:30,030
Joe, no.
187
00:07:30,030 --> 00:07:32,030
We can't go
to sleep yet.
188
00:07:32,030 --> 00:07:35,040
Forget it, Helen,
even I'm not in the mood.
189
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:40,040
No, no, they say you're not
supposed to go to bed angry.
190
00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:41,540
They. Who's they?
191
00:07:41,540 --> 00:07:43,550
They, they, them, them,
whoever, it doesn't matter.
192
00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:45,550
The point is, is you're
not supposed to do it.
193
00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:48,050
All right.
194
00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:49,550
Okay, Helen, you're right.
195
00:07:49,550 --> 00:07:51,550
You're right. I'm sorry.
196
00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:55,060
Me, too.
197
00:08:01,060 --> 00:08:02,570
I want that TV.
198
00:08:02,570 --> 00:08:04,570
Over my dead body!
199
00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:17,080
Congratulate me,
my slogan was approved.
200
00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:18,580
(laughs)
201
00:08:18,580 --> 00:08:19,580
You're kidding.
202
00:08:19,580 --> 00:08:20,580
That's right.
203
00:08:20,580 --> 00:08:22,590
"Welcome to Nantucket.
204
00:08:22,590 --> 00:08:25,590
"Approximately 56 square miles
of smiles
205
00:08:25,590 --> 00:08:28,590
which you will enjoy,
especially in summer."
206
00:08:30,090 --> 00:08:33,100
Well, that's just insane.
207
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:35,100
I will have you know
that it won out
208
00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:37,100
over some very
strong contenders.
209
00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:38,100
Really. Like what?
210
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:40,100
"Nantucket, Isle of Lepers"?
211
00:08:40,100 --> 00:08:44,110
Or... "Nantucket,
haven for Nazis"?
212
00:08:44,110 --> 00:08:45,610
(gasps)
213
00:08:45,610 --> 00:08:47,610
Fine, go ahead,
make your jokes.
214
00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:49,110
But I will have you know
215
00:08:49,110 --> 00:08:51,110
that my boss
loved my slogan.
216
00:08:51,110 --> 00:08:52,620
He loved it so much
217
00:08:52,620 --> 00:08:54,120
that he offered to take me
to dinner anywhere I want,
218
00:08:54,620 --> 00:08:56,120
even off the island.
219
00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:59,120
Matter of fact, he says it's
better if it is off the island.
220
00:09:04,630 --> 00:09:07,130
"Especially in summer"?
221
00:09:07,130 --> 00:09:09,130
That's just insane.
222
00:09:10,630 --> 00:09:12,140
What's the matter?
You look like hell.
223
00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:15,140
Ah, Helen and I had this
big fight last night.
224
00:09:15,140 --> 00:09:17,140
Really? Why? What about?
225
00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:18,640
I don't even know.
226
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:20,640
One minute, it was about
small closets and big TVs,
227
00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:23,650
the next minute,
Helen was in a coma.
228
00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:26,150
Anyway, we went
to bed angry.
229
00:09:26,150 --> 00:09:27,150
Woke up angry.
230
00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:28,650
We're still not talking.
231
00:09:28,650 --> 00:09:31,150
Wait a second, this
doesn't sound good.
232
00:09:31,150 --> 00:09:33,660
Don't tell me
you caved in on the big TV?
233
00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:35,160
Yeah, I did but...
No!
234
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:37,160
Don't give me any grief
about it, okay,
235
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,160
'cause I didn't get
any sleep last night.
236
00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:40,160
I had this
terrible dream.
237
00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:41,660
Yeah, I had a dream, too,
238
00:09:41,660 --> 00:09:46,170
and it included 60 inches
of John Madden's big, red face.
239
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:49,670
This dream was really weird,
man.
240
00:09:50,170 --> 00:09:53,180
There was a... a clown
at Sandpiper and...
241
00:09:53,180 --> 00:09:55,180
Oh, man, I don't want
to talk about it.
242
00:09:55,180 --> 00:09:57,180
Wait, there was a clown
in your dream?
243
00:09:57,180 --> 00:09:58,680
Yeah, why?
244
00:09:58,680 --> 00:10:00,180
Well, because one time,
I was reading this book
245
00:10:00,180 --> 00:10:01,680
about dream symbolism.
246
00:10:01,680 --> 00:10:05,190
For instance, if you're
under water in a dream,
247
00:10:05,190 --> 00:10:06,690
that's about sex.
248
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:07,690
Really?
249
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,190
What about a clown?
250
00:10:10,690 --> 00:10:13,200
Well, that's about sex.
251
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:16,700
Well, trust me, after this fight
with Helen last night,
252
00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:19,700
I didn't get any clown.
253
00:10:19,700 --> 00:10:22,210
So tell me more
about your dream.
254
00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:24,710
Well, it was so bizarre.
I mean, um...
255
00:10:24,710 --> 00:10:26,710
I was in the middle
of the terminal
256
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:28,710
and I was trampled
by a herd of tigers...
257
00:10:28,710 --> 00:10:31,710
Well, that's about group sex.
258
00:10:33,220 --> 00:10:35,720
And then it got really,
really weird.
259
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:39,220
Budd... Budd, the mechanic,
had a crush on me.
260
00:10:39,220 --> 00:10:41,720
And then, Roy started
peeling off all his clothes
261
00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:43,730
and doing a belly dance.
262
00:10:43,730 --> 00:10:46,730
Well, that's about enough.
263
00:10:48,730 --> 00:10:50,730
There... there's more.
264
00:10:50,730 --> 00:10:52,740
Helen and I got on the plane
to go to Boston.
265
00:10:52,740 --> 00:10:54,740
Antonio sort of
forced his way on,
266
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:56,240
and then the engine
started sputtering,
267
00:10:56,740 --> 00:11:00,240
went into a dive,
we crashed, and-and we died.
268
00:11:01,740 --> 00:11:02,750
It was just
a bad dream.
269
00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:04,250
No, no, wait,
wait a second.
270
00:11:04,250 --> 00:11:05,250
You actually died
in your dream?
271
00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:07,250
Go ahead, tell me
it's about sex.
272
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:09,750
What, is everything
sex with you?
273
00:11:09,750 --> 00:11:11,250
This is about death,
and death dreams
274
00:11:11,250 --> 00:11:12,250
you pay attention to.
275
00:11:12,250 --> 00:11:13,760
You're not flying today.
276
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,760
Yes, I am-- Helen and I
have got to go to Boston
277
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,260
to tell the architect to
put back the stupid closet.
278
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:19,760
Joe, listen to me.
279
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:21,760
I don't want to upset you,
but let me put it this way:
280
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:23,770
You fly, you die.
281
00:11:23,770 --> 00:11:26,270
You're going to have
to excuse me, Brian.
282
00:11:26,270 --> 00:11:27,770
I'm late, I have
an appointment...
283
00:11:28,270 --> 00:11:29,270
with reality!
284
00:11:31,270 --> 00:11:32,270
I'm telling you, Joe,
285
00:11:32,780 --> 00:11:34,780
dreams come from
your subconscious.
286
00:11:34,780 --> 00:11:36,280
And yours is trying
to warn you.
287
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:37,780
Brian, would you relax.
288
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,280
It was just a dream.
289
00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:40,780
I'm sorry I'm late.
290
00:11:40,780 --> 00:11:44,290
I just came from
the beauty parlor.
291
00:11:45,290 --> 00:11:47,790
So?
292
00:11:49,290 --> 00:11:50,290
What do you think?
293
00:11:50,290 --> 00:11:52,290
My God.
294
00:11:52,290 --> 00:11:53,800
You're the clown.
295
00:11:54,300 --> 00:11:56,300
Joe, Joe, look!
296
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:57,800
The clown, Joe.
297
00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,300
She's the clown, Joe.
298
00:11:59,300 --> 00:12:01,300
All right.
299
00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:02,810
That's one opinion.
300
00:12:02,810 --> 00:12:04,810
Joe?
301
00:12:04,810 --> 00:12:07,810
So she looks
like a clown.
302
00:12:09,310 --> 00:12:12,310
That doesn't prove anything.
303
00:12:12,310 --> 00:12:15,320
You know, I'm a human being.
304
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:16,820
I have feelings.
305
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:18,320
I'm sensitive.
306
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,320
Wait till I get my hands
on that hairdresser.
307
00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:23,830
The little peckerwood told me
I looked like Ann-Margret.
308
00:12:25,830 --> 00:12:27,330
Brian, I know what
you're thinking
309
00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:29,330
and you are...
no, you're wrong.
310
00:12:29,330 --> 00:12:31,830
There is no such thing
as a premonition.
311
00:12:31,830 --> 00:12:34,340
(boys hollering)
312
00:12:34,340 --> 00:12:36,840
Hey, come on, guys, slow down,
slow down.
313
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:39,340
Joe, Joe, look...
314
00:12:39,340 --> 00:12:41,840
Look, what it says
on their jerseys, man. Look.
315
00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:42,850
O-o-okay, okay.
316
00:12:42,850 --> 00:12:44,350
It says "tigers." Yeah...
Tigers.
317
00:12:44,350 --> 00:12:45,850
There was a clown
in the terminal,
318
00:12:45,850 --> 00:12:46,850
I was trampled
by tigers. Right?
319
00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:48,850
You're reading way
too much into this.
320
00:12:48,850 --> 00:12:50,350
Hello, Joe.
321
00:12:50,350 --> 00:12:52,350
Today, I am going
to Boston
322
00:12:52,350 --> 00:12:53,860
to attend John
Gold's lecture
323
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:57,860
called Life: Don't
Ask, Just Take.
324
00:12:57,860 --> 00:12:59,360
Good for you, Antonio.
325
00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:01,360
Eh! Here's how
this impacts you.
326
00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:02,870
You will give me
a free seat
327
00:13:02,870 --> 00:13:04,870
on your next flight.
328
00:13:04,870 --> 00:13:06,370
Hey, Antonio...
A free seat
329
00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:08,370
in the front of the
plane, next to a window.
330
00:13:09,870 --> 00:13:11,870
And I want a pillow
and a bag of peanuts.
331
00:13:11,870 --> 00:13:13,880
Look, Antonio...
No. No.
332
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,880
There is no
argument here.
333
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:17,380
As John Gold says,
334
00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:19,880
"Have the nerve
to deserve."
335
00:13:19,880 --> 00:13:21,880
Yeah, well,
you have the nerve.
336
00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:23,890
Thank you, the pleasure
is all yours.
337
00:13:26,890 --> 00:13:28,390
I can't believe him.
338
00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:29,890
Hey, I can't believe you!
339
00:13:29,890 --> 00:13:31,390
Did you just see
what he did?
340
00:13:31,390 --> 00:13:33,900
Antonio forced his way
onto the plane,
341
00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:35,900
just like
in your dream.
342
00:13:35,900 --> 00:13:38,400
Yeah, okay, I guess
he was a little pushy.
343
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:40,400
Pushy?
But you know what?
Wait a minute.
344
00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:41,400
I'm not just going
to buy into this.
345
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:43,410
Hey, Budd, let me
ask you something.
346
00:13:43,410 --> 00:13:44,910
When is the last time
347
00:13:44,910 --> 00:13:46,910
you did a complete maintenance
on the plane?
348
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:48,910
Just completed, sir-- checked
the plane from nose to tail.
349
00:13:48,910 --> 00:13:50,410
She's never been
more airworthy, sir.
350
00:13:50,410 --> 00:13:52,920
"Airworthy."
Are you sure?
351
00:13:52,920 --> 00:13:55,920
I have the utmost confidence
in that craft, sir.
352
00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:57,420
He was going to ground me
353
00:13:57,420 --> 00:13:59,920
just 'cause I had a dream
I died in a crash.
354
00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:01,920
You had a...
355
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:03,930
death dream, sir?
356
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:05,930
Yeah. So?
357
00:14:05,930 --> 00:14:07,430
Don't go, sir!
358
00:14:07,430 --> 00:14:08,930
Don't go, please!
359
00:14:08,930 --> 00:14:09,930
I beg you!
360
00:14:09,930 --> 00:14:12,440
Please, Budd,
you're crushing me.
361
00:14:12,940 --> 00:14:13,940
Crush...
362
00:14:13,940 --> 00:14:14,940
Crush!
363
00:14:14,940 --> 00:14:15,940
Crush-- just like
in your dream.
364
00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:18,440
He's got
a crush on you!
365
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,940
These are perfectly
normal feelings
366
00:14:21,940 --> 00:14:24,950
of friendship
and loyalty.
367
00:14:24,950 --> 00:14:25,950
CASEY:
Roy.
Huh?
368
00:14:25,950 --> 00:14:27,950
I'm handing
these buttons out
369
00:14:27,950 --> 00:14:28,950
to all of the
airport employees
370
00:14:29,450 --> 00:14:31,450
to try to promote
the island.
371
00:14:31,450 --> 00:14:32,450
What a stupid slogan.
372
00:14:32,450 --> 00:14:33,960
I'm not wearing that.
373
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:36,960
Hey!
I'll have you know
374
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:38,960
that the guys in the tower
love my slogan.
375
00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:39,960
Oh, yeah?
They'd say anything.
376
00:14:40,460 --> 00:14:42,460
They haven't seen
a woman in 20 years.
377
00:14:42,460 --> 00:14:43,470
Everybody's a critic.
378
00:14:43,470 --> 00:14:45,470
Hey, in case
you're curious,
379
00:14:45,470 --> 00:14:47,970
there's a big, hairy spider
on your collar.
380
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:48,970
Oh, whoa, get it off.
381
00:14:48,970 --> 00:14:50,470
Get it off, I hate spiders.
382
00:14:50,470 --> 00:14:51,970
Somebody help me.
383
00:14:51,970 --> 00:14:54,480
Come on, somebody, help me.
384
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:00,980
BRIAN:
It's the belly dance!
385
00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:04,990
Joe, Joe,
the belly dance!
386
00:15:08,990 --> 00:15:10,990
Oh, my God,
I'm going to die.
387
00:15:10,990 --> 00:15:13,500
No, not if you don't get
on that plane, you won't.
388
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:15,500
Okay, Joe, ready
to go to Boston?
389
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:16,500
Uh...
390
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:18,500
Helen, um,
do we really have to go
391
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:20,500
and see the architect today?
392
00:15:20,500 --> 00:15:22,000
What do you mean?
393
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:25,510
Well, uh... hazardous
weather conditions.
394
00:15:25,510 --> 00:15:27,010
There's not a
cloud in the sky.
395
00:15:27,010 --> 00:15:30,010
That's right,
it's calm out there.
396
00:15:30,010 --> 00:15:33,020
Perhaps a little too calm.
397
00:15:33,020 --> 00:15:35,020
Very clever, guys.
398
00:15:35,020 --> 00:15:37,520
You think if you can
get me to wait one day,
399
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,020
that I'll change my mind
and you'll get your TV.
400
00:15:40,020 --> 00:15:41,520
No, no, this is
not about the TV.
401
00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:44,030
That's right, it's about
you going back on your word.
402
00:15:44,030 --> 00:15:45,030
He is not going
back on his word.
403
00:15:45,530 --> 00:15:46,530
Helen, he's got
a perfectly good reason
404
00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:48,030
why he's not going
to fly to Boston today.
405
00:15:48,030 --> 00:15:49,030
What's that?
406
00:15:49,530 --> 00:15:53,040
He got some bad mogambo
happenin'.
407
00:15:55,540 --> 00:15:57,040
What is wrong with you?
He's right.
408
00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:59,040
Bad mogambo.
409
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:02,550
See, I had this dream
about a clown and tigers
410
00:16:02,540 --> 00:16:04,050
and Roy doing
a belly dance,
411
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:05,550
and so far, it's
all come true.
412
00:16:05,550 --> 00:16:07,550
What?
No, no, Helen,
you don't understand.
413
00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:09,550
And then you and I got
on the plane with Antonio,
414
00:16:09,550 --> 00:16:10,550
and we crashed.
415
00:16:10,550 --> 00:16:12,050
Don't you see
what this means?
416
00:16:12,050 --> 00:16:14,560
Yeah, it means
you'll do anything to
get that stupid TV.
417
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:15,560
Come on, let's go.
418
00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,060
(coughs):
Mogambo. Mogambo.
419
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:18,560
Helen, Helen.
420
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,060
Listen, you don't understand.
421
00:16:20,060 --> 00:16:21,560
You are messing
with a force
422
00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:24,070
of enormous
destructive power.
423
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:26,570
So are you.
424
00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:31,570
"I am strong.
425
00:16:31,570 --> 00:16:33,580
"I'm powerful.
426
00:16:33,580 --> 00:16:35,580
"I have my own mind.
427
00:16:35,580 --> 00:16:39,080
"I rely on no one's ideas
but my own.
428
00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:41,580
Turn tape over."
429
00:16:41,580 --> 00:16:42,580
I can't believe
430
00:16:42,580 --> 00:16:44,090
you tried to weasel
out of going
431
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:46,090
to see
the architect today.
432
00:16:46,090 --> 00:16:47,590
Helen, I didn't try to
weasel out of anything.
433
00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:49,090
I just had a dream.
434
00:16:49,090 --> 00:16:50,090
Oh, yeah, the dream.
435
00:16:50,090 --> 00:16:52,600
Ooga-booga.
436
00:16:52,590 --> 00:16:55,100
(engine sputtering, rattling)
Joe?
437
00:16:55,100 --> 00:16:57,100
Yeah, I know, I know.
438
00:16:57,100 --> 00:17:00,100
I demand a smoother ride,
please.
439
00:17:00,100 --> 00:17:01,600
(engine sputtering)
440
00:17:02,100 --> 00:17:04,110
Joe, what is that?
441
00:17:04,110 --> 00:17:08,110
That's what we pilots call
"a real bad noise."
442
00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:09,610
Please tell me you're just
doing this to scare me.
443
00:17:10,110 --> 00:17:11,610
Yeah, that's right,
I thought I'd kill us both
444
00:17:11,610 --> 00:17:13,620
just to teach you a lesson.
445
00:17:13,620 --> 00:17:16,120
I have bitten a bitter peanut.
446
00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:18,620
I demand a replacement.
447
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:20,120
(engine sputtering)
448
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:23,630
Hey, that's a real bad noise.
449
00:17:23,630 --> 00:17:26,130
I would like that noise
to stop, now.
450
00:17:26,130 --> 00:17:27,630
(sputtering stops)
451
00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:28,630
Ah...
452
00:17:30,630 --> 00:17:32,630
Wow, that's amazing,
he willed it to stop.
453
00:17:32,630 --> 00:17:35,640
Yeah, it stopped because
the number two engine just died.
454
00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:48,650
This is Nevada
1-2-1, Papa-Papa.
455
00:17:48,650 --> 00:17:51,150
Brian, come in, we
got a slight problem.
456
00:17:51,150 --> 00:17:53,160
BRIAN:
You're going down, aren't you?
457
00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:55,160
Yeah, that's the slight problem.
458
00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:57,660
The number two engine just died,
we're 5,000 feet.
459
00:17:57,660 --> 00:18:00,160
I'm coming around
for an emergency landing.
460
00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:01,660
You happy now, Helen?
461
00:18:01,660 --> 00:18:03,670
We got a major
mogambo situation
462
00:18:03,670 --> 00:18:05,170
happening here.
463
00:18:06,170 --> 00:18:08,170
BUDD:
Sir, this is Budd.
464
00:18:08,170 --> 00:18:09,670
Don't worry,
that number one engine
465
00:18:09,670 --> 00:18:11,170
is as good
as the day she was built.
466
00:18:11,170 --> 00:18:13,180
Just hold steady and she'll get
you back home safe and sound.
467
00:18:13,180 --> 00:18:14,180
Over and out.
468
00:18:14,180 --> 00:18:17,680
BUDD:
God help those poor bastards.
469
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,680
Budd, is your finger
still on the mic?
470
00:18:26,190 --> 00:18:28,190
Oops.
471
00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:30,190
It's okay, we still have
one good engine, right?
472
00:18:30,190 --> 00:18:31,690
We can make it in.
473
00:18:31,690 --> 00:18:32,690
Yeah, sure we can.
Okay.
474
00:18:32,690 --> 00:18:35,200
(sputtering)
475
00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:38,700
Oh, that's another
real bad noise, isn't it?
476
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:39,700
Yeah, I'm afraid so.
477
00:18:39,700 --> 00:18:41,200
Oh, we're going down,
aren't we?
478
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:43,210
I'm afraid so.
479
00:18:43,210 --> 00:18:46,710
"Tape four: Living
a Long and Healthy Life."
480
00:18:50,210 --> 00:18:53,720
Ah, I see we've started
our descent.
481
00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:56,220
And ahead of schedule, too.
482
00:18:56,220 --> 00:18:58,720
Just as I willed it.
483
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:01,220
Antonio, both engines died--
we're plummeting into the ocean!
484
00:19:01,220 --> 00:19:03,230
What?
485
00:19:03,230 --> 00:19:04,230
Nonsense.
486
00:19:04,230 --> 00:19:06,230
The problem is,
as John Gold would say,
487
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:09,230
that you are accepting
that the plane is going down.
488
00:19:09,230 --> 00:19:12,740
I demand that this plane go up.
489
00:19:13,240 --> 00:19:14,240
Up, plane, up.
490
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:15,740
How are we doing?
491
00:19:15,740 --> 00:19:17,740
Oh, we're about
to split a whale in half.
492
00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:20,240
Okay, okay, time to get serious.
493
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:21,240
Up, plane, up.
494
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:22,750
We're at 2,000 feet.
495
00:19:22,740 --> 00:19:23,750
Oh, God!
496
00:19:23,750 --> 00:19:24,750
Up, plane!
497
00:19:24,750 --> 00:19:25,750
Up!
1,500 feet.
498
00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:28,750
(shouting):
Please, please, plane, up, up!
499
00:19:28,750 --> 00:19:29,250
1,000 feet.
500
00:19:29,250 --> 00:19:30,250
Oh, God!
501
00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:32,250
John Gold, I'll see you in hell!
502
00:19:32,250 --> 00:19:33,760
Assume crash
positions.
503
00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:34,760
What's that?
504
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:37,260
The position you want
to be found dead in.
505
00:19:39,260 --> 00:19:41,260
Joe, I'm sorry we fought.
506
00:19:41,260 --> 00:19:43,270
Me, too. I love you.
I love you.
507
00:19:43,270 --> 00:19:45,770
If we have to go, at least
we get to go together.
508
00:19:46,270 --> 00:19:48,270
I have a confession to make.
509
00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:52,270
I've had impure thoughts
about my fat Aunt Graziella.
510
00:19:52,270 --> 00:19:53,280
Helen!
511
00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:54,280
Oh, Joe!
512
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:56,280
Aunt Graziella!
513
00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:59,280
(gasps)
514
00:20:05,790 --> 00:20:08,290
Helen.
515
00:20:08,290 --> 00:20:09,290
Helen, wake up.
516
00:20:09,290 --> 00:20:10,790
What?
What's wrong?
517
00:20:10,790 --> 00:20:12,790
Oh, I had a horrible dream.
518
00:20:13,300 --> 00:20:14,300
Oh, honey.
519
00:20:14,300 --> 00:20:15,800
It was so weird.
520
00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,800
In my dream,
I had another dream
521
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:22,300
that we were in the plane
and it went down.
522
00:20:22,300 --> 00:20:23,810
And-and-and I told Brian
about it,
523
00:20:23,810 --> 00:20:25,810
and he warned us
not to go on the plane,
524
00:20:25,810 --> 00:20:28,810
but we did anyway and...
and we were killed.
525
00:20:28,810 --> 00:20:29,810
(gasps)
526
00:20:29,810 --> 00:20:31,810
That's terrible.
527
00:20:34,820 --> 00:20:37,820
Promise me, we will never
go to bed angry again.
528
00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:39,820
I promise.
529
00:20:39,820 --> 00:20:41,820
And, honey, if this is
upsetting you this much...
530
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:44,330
you can have your big TV.
531
00:20:44,830 --> 00:20:46,330
Really?
532
00:20:46,330 --> 00:20:47,830
But what about
your closet?
533
00:20:47,830 --> 00:20:49,330
Oh, it doesn't
matter.
534
00:20:49,330 --> 00:20:51,830
What matters is
that you're happy.
535
00:20:51,830 --> 00:20:54,340
And if you're happy...
536
00:20:54,340 --> 00:20:55,840
I'm happy.
537
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,340
Hey, as long
as we're up...
538
00:21:03,850 --> 00:21:05,350
(gasps)
539
00:21:10,850 --> 00:21:11,850
Helen.
540
00:21:12,350 --> 00:21:13,360
Helen, wake up.
541
00:21:13,360 --> 00:21:14,360
What?
542
00:21:14,860 --> 00:21:16,860
Oh...
543
00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:19,360
Oh, I had
a horrible dream.
544
00:21:19,360 --> 00:21:21,360
Oh, it was so weird.
545
00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:23,370
In my dream,
I had another dream
546
00:21:23,370 --> 00:21:26,870
that we were in the plane
and it crashed, and, uh...
547
00:21:26,870 --> 00:21:29,370
then I woke up
and I told you about it,
548
00:21:29,370 --> 00:21:31,870
and that turned out
to be a dream, too.
549
00:21:31,870 --> 00:21:34,880
But, uh... oh, wow,
you were so great.
550
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:38,880
You were so great and
understanding and, uh...
551
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:43,390
...you said I can have
my big TV and...
552
00:21:46,390 --> 00:21:48,390
...then we kissed
and, uh...
553
00:21:48,390 --> 00:21:49,390
and then we...
554
00:21:49,390 --> 00:21:51,390
Boy, you were dreaming.
555
00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:01,900
I don't believe that.
556
00:22:01,900 --> 00:22:02,900
It's true.
557
00:22:02,900 --> 00:22:04,410
That is the weirdest
dream I ever heard, man.
558
00:22:04,410 --> 00:22:08,410
They actually
approved Casey's slogan?
559
00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:09,910
Oh... man.
560
00:22:09,910 --> 00:22:12,410
Well, that's just insane.
561
00:22:12,410 --> 00:22:13,920
I know.
562
00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:15,420
It was just a dream.
563
00:22:15,420 --> 00:22:16,920
Dreams have nothing
to do with reality.
564
00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:18,920
Yeah, I guess
you're right.
39134
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