All language subtitles for Beverly.Hills.90210.S10E08.Baby.You.Can.Drive.My.Car.1080p.PMTP.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-iRMAS_track3_[eng]

JANET:
Can I get you some cream?

KELLY:
Yes.

Ooh, here's a list
of caterers.

Oh, by the way, Noah's

going to be moving
some of his stuff

into the beach apartment
tomorrow.

- Is that okay?
- Sure.

Yeah, it's no problem.

Actually, most of my stuff
is over here anyway.

It's just till we can find
a place we can both afford.

Donna, it's okay.

How about calla lilies?

How can I think about flowers

when I haven't even set
a wedding date yet?

Simple-- where's the calendar?

Well, I can't pick a date until
I have a reception hall.

And to do that, I need to know
the number of guests.

Which is pretty hard to do

considering my parents won't
return my phone calls,

Steve's mother is in London,

and Rush is on a singles cruise
to the Panama Canal.

Men are so innocent
when they're sleeping.

Oh, he's my angel.

DONNA:
Aww.

(rock music fades in)

MAN:
Yeah!

(laughing)

Oh, thank you.

Yes!

The best...

ALL:
...bachelor party ...ever!

Yeah!

JANET:
I just need to relax.

You know, get out
of the planning mode

for a little while.

Well, you know,
the groom can help

with some
of the arrangements, too.

Oh, yeah, and Steve is so
detail-oriented.

Bye.

Bye, you guys.
Thank you so much.

Whoo!

- Love it!
- Bachelor!

Olé!

- Whoa!
- Whoa!

Yeah!

JANET (echoing):
Steve... Steve...

Steve...
Steve... Steve... Steve...

Steve, I have a question
about the reception.

What do you think,
beer in bottles or glasses?

Well?

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I close my eyes and I'm
grateful enough today ♪

♪ From this dream I wake up ♪

♪ I'm all alone
and I'm not afraid ♪

♪ 'Cause everything I see
is screwed up ♪

♪ Erase it from your memory ♪

♪ 'Cause I, I never was
and I never will be ♪

♪ If I could be a ghost,
I would be ♪

♪ Come on, set me free ♪

♪ Hey, I'm easy ♪

♪ Help me forget my name... ♪

Well, I see you have
camping and sports.

Why doesn't somebody teach
those kids photography?

That was my dad's hobby.

We've had some interest.

We just don't have a darkroom.

Huh. Darkroom-- one darkroom,
coming right up.

Wow. I come to recruit
volunteers and I get a check.

So don't let too many
nonprofits find out about you.

- (knocking)
- Hi, honey bunny.

Hey.

Gina, this is my friend
Andrew Emery.

He runs the Beverly Glen
Community Center.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- How are you?
- Good.

- Good.
- There you go.

Wow.

Listen, we could
really use your help

with midnight basketball.

I'm trying to get all my donors

involved in one way or another.

I don't know.

I think this is about
as hands-on as I get.

Listen, Miguel and Arturo,
those kids from the hotel,

they still talk about you
all the time.

Yeah, well, they fear me.

Take a day to consider.

- Nice meeting you.
- Oh, great to meet you.

- Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye.

- Hi...
- Hi.

I think you should do that.

- Really?
- Mm-hmm, yeah.

You know, only one hard sell
per morning.

That's kind of my rule.

We could volunteer together.

Wow, I didn't think
you were the type.

I really want to do
things together.

You know, couples do
things together.

Well, I tell you what let's do--

you go downstairs and volunteer
us a table.

I'm going to return
some phone calls,

and then I'll come down
and we will have breakfast

as a couple.

- Okay?
- Okay.

All right.

But you're going to think
about it, right?

Sure.

(clears throat)

Your father is a pig.

Can I get some blueberry
pancakes to go, please?

Good morning.

Apparently, Mel was at one of
Gina's little feminist rallies

at the After Dark.

Jackie found out.

And I don't think he got
a duffle bag out of the house.

It's Mel and Jackie.

They break up and get back
together all the time.

Not this time. She's completely
humiliated. It's over.

Hey.

- Hey.
- What's going on?

Well, my daddy looked
at a naked girl,

so Kelly's mommy
kicked him out.

Oh, how'd she find out
about it?

I don't know.
I didn't ask

and Jackie has a little too much
class to offer up.

I'm going to go put
my playlist together.

See you guys later.

I'm just curious.

How much does it cost to
break up a family these days--

40, 50 bucks a lap dance?

It really depends
on the cup size.

No one forced Mel
to come down there.

- Did you see him there?
- No, I didn't.

Oh, look. And by the way,

I wasn't alone on my little
business venture.

Why don't you scold
someone else now?

So, it's moving day.

I got some food
for the troops.

Steve and Matt are
going to help out.

Shouldn't take long
then, should it?

No, no, it shouldn't.

Look, I want to treat
for dinner tonight.

Kind of a roommate
bonding thing, you know.

I said blueberry!

Okay.

(sighs)

Life is just so full of
disappointments, isn't it?

Please go to hell.

I did a good job painting
the room, didn't I?

If I can get the nursery done
in two days,

then we have the rest of the
week for wedding details.

Yeah. You know what,

I'm going to get the
rest of Noah's stuff

over to the beach apartment.

Green is the most restful color,
did you know that?

(voice breaking):
Studies show

that it's beneficial
for teething babies

and soothes stomachaches
in the workplace.

Hey.

Hey, Janet, what's wrong?

I don't want to be
a lumbering bride.

Oh, come on...
you are so beautiful.

When I thought about my wedding
when I was a little girl,

it didn't include
being pregnant.

No wonder people do these things
one at a time.

Everything is going
to be great, I promise.

How?

When our-- our nursery
isn't finished yet,

we don't have a church

and I have stovepipe legs
and swollen hands.

Because I am madly
in love with you.

And neither one of us have
anything to be insecure about.

Thanks.

(sniffs)

I think the green is working.

(chuckles)

Good, good.

Hey, when you get back,

let's set a date.

- Okay?
- Deal.

You know, the chef here
cooked for me

every night for two years.

The only good thing
about breaking up

was reclaiming my waistline.

Well, she obviously knows
her way around a kitchen.

He, actually. Keith.

Okay, give my compliments
to Chef Keith.

Okay.

Listen, Andrew, about, you know,
the center

- and me volunteering?
- Mm-hmm.

I've thought about that.

It's just not me.

Aw, I can't say that's
the answer I'd hoped for.

Well, you know,
I figure I contribute

in the way I can best.

You know, I write checks.

Besides you guys
don't need me around there.

Someone has to be.

I'm quitting at the end
of the month.

This job keeps me in the closet.

I can't do it anymore.

Well, coming out
might be an option.

Lot of people doing it.

Have you ever met my co-director
at the center, Patsy Regan?

Yeah, she seems efficient.

And conservative.

Her son plays for the center's
basketball team.

I think she'd be pretty upset
to learn

that his coach is a real live
homosexual.

Aw, come on, man.

This is the '90s.
You got to be kidding me.

If you can teach the
fundamentals of the game,

who cares whether you're gay
or not?

Locker rooms, showers,
young kids.

Not jumping to any conclusions?

'Cause a lot of people would.

Yeah, well,

I ain't one of them.

- Okay.
- All right?

All right.

What's wrong, faggots?

Couldn't find a room?

Now, you listen there, freak.

I'm going to teach
you guys a lesson

about hanging out in
parking lots.

Somebody call the cops!

You all right?

STEVE: Janet, I was thinking,
how about December 4?

Holy mackerel!

It started to slant
and I couldn't stop.

I'm like a ducky border junkie.

Okay, uh, I'm cutting you off.

We're behind schedule, Steve.

This is supposed to be the
happiest time of my life,

and I can't do it all by myself.

I can tell you're miserable.

Those ducks aren't
going to flap up there

all by themselves, you know.

Okay, honey, you're really doing
a great job,

but I think maybe I should take
it from here, okay? Release.

I think we need a new approach.

Something radically different,
and I've got a great idea.

It involves our friends,

so you're going to have to
trust me on this, okay?

Hmm? Huh?

Yes, thank you, Detective.

The guy that I nabbed isn't
going to give up his buddies.

It would seem the cops need
a statement from you.

Well, they can't have it.

Don't you think you have some
kind of, you know, obligation

to the gay community here?

I was lucky to get in and out
of the hospital quietly.

If I speak out,

it opens a floodgate
of media attention.

Maybe that's not such
a bad thing.

Reporters,
newspaper headlines:

"Gay community center
director bashed."

But here's what people say
off camera:

"Who let that pervert
near our kids?"

Andrew, if you're silent,

th-this kind of thing could
happen to someone else.

If you want to take a stand,

make the statement
for both of us.

Hi.

Oh, what happened to you?

Are you okay?

In a car wreck.
Everyone's fine.

Oh, good.

Could you give us,
just, um, a minute, Gina?

- Sure. -Oh, that's all right.
I-I was just leaving.

What happened to your arm?

Oh, nothing.

I, uh, I got in a fight.

Oh. Who'd you punch this time?

I don't really want
to talk about it.

Okay.

Listen, my mom called.

DYLAN:
Hmm.

I guess there's some
two-for-one special going

from L.A. to Denver.

Feel like taking a little trip?

Since when do you want to spend
time with Bobbi?

Yeah, I know.

It's just that she invited me.

Us, actually.

You barely talk about her.

I'm sorry. Never mind.

Stupid idea.

Do you know
my favorite color, Dylan?

Or, um, I don't know,

who my first boyfriend was?

I know everything about you.

I'm tired, Gina.

Because I ask. And then when

you answer me,
I hang on your every word.

(voice breaking):
See, the difference between

me and you is that...

I'm in love with you.

That's not fair.

No kidding.

(door opens, shuts)

You guys are
all probably wondering why

we called you here.

With no advance notice.

It's because you're all going
on a scavenger hunt.

You are required to drive
around, find certain items,

maybe do something in
a specific location.

Everyone's on a team,

and each team works together
to figure out the clues.

And each clue leads
to another clue,

and the scavenger hunt
leads to the party.

- What party?
- Well, with all the craziness

of planning for the baby

and the wedding, we kinda forgot
about the fun stuff.

Yeah, so we figured we'd pool
all our showers

and bachelorette parties
and bachelor parties together

and carouse with you guys.

Can't you just, you know,

tell us where
the clambake is, and...?

No! But if you get lost,
there'll be

an emergency phone number.

No cheating.

And you are

financially responsible

for your own traffic violations.

But remember, this is a race.

What does the winner get?

Well, it's gonna be a surprise,

but we think
you're gonna love it

Are you guys ready?
Okay, car one, Donna and Matt.

Car two, David, Kelly and Noah.

Perfect.

Car three, Gina and Dylan.

Each box contains the first clue
plus all the tools you'll need.

Ready, set, go.

Trust no one! Check the kit
in the car! Run!

(Nat laughs)

"You could never duplicate
the love Steve and Janet share,

though this establishment
on Olympic and Doheny may try."

There's a mall there.

Yeah, Khalid's Copy Mat.

"Duplicate the love."

DAVID:
Dupli...

Map...
All right, let's go.

Copy Center? What's, what's up
with that, huh?

(chuckles)

What?

Okay, let's just pretend
like nothing's happening.

Kelly, I just-I don't want to
get into it, all right?

How many times do you think
Mel has cheated on Jackie?

I don't know how many times.
I have no idea.

David, you have sided
with my mom every time.

This is no different.

Yeah, it is different.

Last time he cheated, all right,
he got a lap dance. Big deal.

Oh, that's so comforting.

(David sighs)

You know, your mom is-is
the one who's breaking up

the family, all right?
Not Mel.

Because she is sick of it.

She's sick of him eyeing
every salesgirl,

every waitress that walks by.

Some of them were dancers,
not prostitutes, Kel.

What exactly was the dancer-
to-prostitute ratio?

Because knowing that,
I think, would make

me and my mom and my little
sister feel so much better.

Yeah.

Okay, "You could never duplicate
the love Steve and Janet share,

though this establishment
on Olympic and Doheny may try."

Mm-hmm. Ah, a clue.

Must be the right place.

"If we had one of these,

"maybe we could schedule
our lives better.

"Show off the gifts that God
gave you by making a calendar.

"One body part for each month.

"Then ask the clerk
for the next clue.

P.S. Extra points
for photocopying your butt."

My butt?!
Your butt, mister.

- Your butt.
- Oh, you...

How do you go about making
a calendar?

Oh! Mmm!

DONNA:
Ow!

Ah!

(groans)

Kel, um, I'm gonna ask
you a question.

Does, does torturing him
make you feel better?

A little, yeah.

You think you might want
to ease up a little?

Hey, got a second?

All right, listen,
I'll back the car up

and point it towards the street.

Good man! Go!

You've gotta switch cars
with me.

Why, what's going on?

I don't know.
Kelly's acting really weird.

- Oh!
- Switch with me, okay?

Fine! Matt, come back!

And this is just because
David's a fast driver, okay?

- Okay. Mmm. -Listen, you and
Kelly are roommates for now,

so you gotta try and get along.

That's what I want to do.
I want to get along.

Fine. Aah! (grunting)

Looks like you boys have

some photocopying to do,
suckers!

NOAH:
Hey, come on!

Team change.

DAVID:
Team change?

Why? Noah not having fun?

I think he just gets carsick
in the back seat or something.

You guys want to win, right?!

Winning is our mantra.

Win, win, win... win!

All right, clue three:

"'Tis the season
to be jolly, almost.

"Visit the house that leads
the neighborhood

in holiday spirit"

Oh, isn't that that freaky
family on Collins Street

that, like, puts up their
decorations in early November?

I think so, I think so.

"Appropriate some decorating
as you're knowing full well

they'll be returned
at the end of the hunt."

You have to steal
someone's yule log?

No, it's says in there
we return it.

Yeah, it's a loan.

DAVID:
Yeah, it's a loan.

As long as it's not a nativity
scene, whatever.

Back to the car. Chop, chop!

Why don't you get a CD player
in this thing?

I can never find a stupid
radio station.

Well, we're supposed
to be looking

for a copy center right now.

(gasps) Oh, look at
the little dog!

- What?
- Look! Pull over, pull over!

We have to get him.
Look, he's crossing the street.

Dylan pull over.

- No.
Yes, he's gonna get hit!

Gina, dogs take walks
all the time.

- Dylan, we have to pick him up!
- I'll call Animal Control.

No, you can't call
Animal Control.

Are you crazy?

They'll put him to sleep.

- Would you stop the car, please?
- For what?

So we can take him back
to the hotel and feed him.

Hey, no, no,
we are not getting a dog.

(sarcastic chuckle)
Yes, sir.

Oh, I guess that would
actually be doing

something together,
wouldn't it?

When this is over,
we'll go home...

When this is over, what, Dylan?

We're gonna go home and have sex

and continue to ignore
the distance between us?

Sounds amazing.

All right, clue number three.
You ready?

Number three, go ahead.

"Appropriate some decorating
as your own,

"knowing full well
it'll be returned

at the end of the hunt."

Smells like a felony to me.

Oh, my God, dude,
have you looked in here?

Check her out.

(laughs)

Oh, God, suddenly, stealing
someone's personal property

seems rather tame.

What are you doing?

What do you mean
what am I doing?

You know how long it takes
to blow one of these things up?

Buddy, please, I'm just guessing
it takes a while, okay?

Yeah.

Hello, Officer.

How you doing?

This is just a, uh, just a toy,
like a joke, you know?

We're just, uh,
just riding around.

Uh, you probably want me
to pull over, don't you?

All right, ladies,
make it quick.

KELLY:
David?

What?
What if something goes down?

We're gonna need
a getaway driver, right?

Donna, you want to keep
our lead or not?

DONNA:
Ow!

KELLY:
Ah.

May I help you girls?

(nervously):
Um, hi. How you doing?

Uh, we're from the Neighborhood
Council for Overdone Decorating,

and you're under investigation.

Yeah, we need to borrow
some of your lights.

And a little bit
of tinsel, just for

the council to look over.

And approve.

Possibly award.

Don't BS me, young ladies!

What is this all about?

We're on a scavenger hunt.

I met my husband
on one of those!

Oh!

Are you winning?

Oh, we're killing them!

- Oh, no!
- Eek!

Don't just stand there!

DAVID:
You guys having fun yet?

DYLAN:
Yeah, tons.

There was a sweet little dog,
he almost got hit by a car,

and he wouldn't even stop
to help him.

Where was it?

Just right off of Wilshire,
like, two blocks away.

Hey, why don't you guys
wait for us.

We're gonna go check
on something.

Tell you what-- you go ahead;

Donna and Kelly can ride
with me.

KELLY:
Are you sure?

Yeah.

Uh, what about Gina?

(sighs)

All right,
let's get the damn dog.

Gina!

Are we going?

(car door shuts, engine starts)

You're all about winning, right?

Okay, "Take a load off
at the mattress store on Maple.

"Choose a favorite bed, and
photograph the relaxing moment

"with your team
and the store manager.

"Think you can do this one
in your sleep?

The enclosed prop
must be in the photo, too."

Ooh.

Oh.

Dylan, I believe
these are yours.

Yeah, think again.

I think that store's on
Third and Maple.

The gas is
the pedal to the right.

Hit it.

(cell phone ringing)

Yeah?

Hey. It's Andrew.

They caught the other guys.

They need you at a lineup
tomorrow at 10:00 a.m.

Well, don't you think you should
be there to identify them

and point out
what they did was wrong?

So, do you need
the detective's number?

No, I got his card.

What's going on?

Why do you have a brace
on your wrist?

Let's just say I had
a bad day yesterday,

and I don't really feel
much like a scavenger hunt,

- all right?
- Yeah, we noticed.

And, apparently, so did Gina.

Which is too bad, because
if you try, it's more fun--

across the board.

Relationships, too.

So now you two
are concerned about Gina?

Well, if you can't spend
an hour in a car,

what are you two doing together?

Having fun.

That's enough for me.

Dylan, you've been
married before.

You know what it's like
to be with the right person.

I'm surprised
you'd settle for less.

- You know, she almost got hit.
- There's a tag,

but there's no name
or address or anything on it.

- Yeah.
- Well, there's a license number.

That should help.

We'll take care of her. Come on.

Yeah?

Okay, bye.

Bye.

- Sweetie.
- Bye-bye.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
where you going?

We have to make sure she's okay.

We have to wait.

Can't believe she was
running around like that

all by herself, you know?

Dylan didn't even care.

I invited him home
to meet my mom, he said no.

I'm sorry. That must have been
really hard for you.

Yeah, it's not like
I exactly jump at the chance

to show someone
the shoe box I grew up in.

I'm sure it will all work out.

Thanks for helping me
get the dog.

You didn't even care
that she was a mess.

You know as well as I do,

you'd rather Dylan was here
with you than me.

I wish he was more like you.

DONNA:
Come on!

I'm not ashamed.

(camera whirring)

Sorry, your flap was open.

Move, people, move!

Oh.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Can I help you?

Yeah, look, I can tell
you're a busy man,

so I'm just gonna
get right to it.

What are the chances of you
and me laying down on that bed?

You and me there?

Quickly--
it's for a good cause.

Yeah, it would mean so much.

He was neglected
as a child and...

Well, it's against
company policy or...

Had to go to the neighbors
for a hug.

It'd be a big breakthrough.

All right, listen, if I do this,

will you leave,
quietly and immediately?

- Promise.
- Oh, yeah.

Okay.

Uh, just-just don't mind her.

- Go ahead, jump.
- (man groans)

Good one.

Where's the damn clue?

- Smile.
- What am I...?

Oh, yeah.

Got it, I got it!

Where you going?

- I, uh...
- Relax.

Okay.

"Make history.
This clue will lead you

"to the park where Janet,
our little math maven,

"circled the classified ad

that brought her to
the Beverly Beat and Steve."

What are you doing?

What, you think
only boys can do math?

- (cell phone ringing)
- Oh. Stop fighting.

- I'll get it.
- Get off me.

- Do you know you got to
carry the two? -Hello.

Yeah, it's Noah. Is Donna there?

DONNA:
Where are you?

I'm at the Christmas house.

We've already had
one run-in with the law.

Something tells me
we're about to have a second.

Wouldn't that be a third,

including your little
erotic dancing bust?

Can I talk to Donna?

No. She's busy.

Kel, give me the phone.

(door opens)

Might as well give up.

My girl Donna's gonna win.

- (door closes)
- Do you or Matt have

that emergency number
that Steve and Janet passed out?

- Yeah.
- Call them.

Say you're a quitter,

and they'll tell you
where to go, okay?

(dial tone)

Was that Noah?

Yes.

STORE MANAGER:
I did really well on

my math S.A.T.'s. I...

(wry laugh)
Yeah, I'm very proud.

Uh, wh... what's your problem
with my boyfriend?

You really want to know?

I think he cuts corners
to get what he wants.

Like running a strip joint
for extra cash.

15,488.

15,488 what?

(grunts)

Sunset Boulevard.

Yep, if you want
to go to the party.

Oh, you're good!

- Here we go!
- Go!

Oh.

She okay?

Well, she's dehydrated
and malnourished.

She's been on her own
for a while.

Well, I'm gonna take her home.

Actually, she's been
reported missing.

We ran the license number

on her collar.
Her name is Joan,

and her owner's on the way.

I thought you'd want
to say good-bye.

Uh, wait a minute-- you're gonna
return her to the people

who let her run around
in traffic?

I mean, that's not the way you
treat something you love, is it?

Who'd name their dog Joan?

There's my number.

If they'd like
to discuss her future,

they can call me.

Come on, sweetie.

(chuckles)

Hey, how'd you guys
get here so fast?

Have I mentioned I don't even
like crossword puzzles?

- (chuckles)
- And that Christmas house lady--

- very, very scary.
- Oh.

Turns out, we couldn't even
find a clue,

so I had to call Janet and Steve

and beg them for mercy.

That means...

Mm-hmm.

Yes! I'm the winner!

(chuckling)

- Oh, I mean, we are victorious.
- Thank you.

- We're all the winners together.
We did it. -Mm-hmm.

Wait, how did all these
decorations get here?

Is this the end of the road?

Please tell me this is
the end of the road.

I don't know.
Where's Janet and Steve?

Uh, better yet, where's the dog?

Oh, she's in the car.

In fact, David said that she
could stay at his house until

- I find a home.
- Really?

You or the dog?

I don't know. We're both looking
for something more permanent.

Hello, you guys.

A clue, right there.

Walked right by it.

(chuckles)

Okay.

"Established in 1919,

"this is one of the oldest parks
in Los Angeles.

"It served as a backdrop
for many movie love scenes,

and today it unites two and
a half people for all time."

That's it?
W-What's the question?

"Two and a half people"?
What's that?

("Here Comes the Bride"
playing over recorder)

Congratulations.

(chuckles)

You made it.

(music ends)

We are gathered here,
in the presence of God,

to witness the marriage
of Steve and Janet.

Surprise.

We hope you guys don't feel
tricked into coming.

Would you like to join hands?

I, Steve,

take you, Janet...

To be my wife.

...to be my wife.

And I promise...

Before God and these witnesses.

...before God
and these witnesses...

Do you mind
if I take it from here?

Janet, I swear,

in front of the people
who mean the most to me,

to love you
for the rest of my life.

You have given me
so much to be thankful for.

For you, for our family...

I will fill our lives
with love and devotion.

And in these arms,
you will always have shelter.

And in my heart,
you will always have a home.

You have showed me
the true meaning of partnership

and helped make me
a better person.

Oh, my gosh.
(sniffles)

Me, too.
(laughs)

My life has changed

so much since I've known you.

You make me laugh.

I love you.
You make me so happy.

I take you as my husband.

And I vow to honor
our lives together,

our family...

(sobs)

our friends...

(sniffles)

our love.

(laughs)

Wedding rings are a visible sign

of an invisible bond.

they have no beginning
and no end.

With this ring...

With this ring,
I make you my husband.

And join my life with yours.

And with this ring,

I do the same.

By the authority vested in me,

I now pronounce Steve and Janet
husband and wife.

(applause)

I can't believe
you guys pulled it off.

- It was very fun.
- That park's been a landmark

- for 80 years.
- Something old.

Here, you should frame this.

Oh.

(chuckles):
Oh.

Dylan McKay discovers

his inner child.

Hey, I'd like to keep
those pajamas, by the way.

I, uh, I think some people
will find them sexy.

Oh, that mattress that you're
lying on is something new.

It's actually gonna be
delivered tomorrow.

Oh, great. Thanks, Dylan.
We didn't have time

to comparison shop.

What happened
to the blow-up doll?

Never made it there.

Oh, it would've been great.

The, um, Christmas lights
were something borrowed.

Yeah, you know what?
How-how'd you guys get

the lights there
before we got there?

How about a round of applause

for our trusty friend
and courier Nat.

- Yay! -♪ Ta-da. ♪
- Nat's the man.

There you go.

- Yay.
- And finally,

something blue.

The Body Parts calendar.

(laughter)

And the undisputed champion,
of course,

is Donna Martin.

Ah, what do I get,
what do I get?

A gift certificate
to The Peach Pit.

- Wow. Thank you.
- (laughter)

- Ooh.
- STEVE: Plus, you get

to return Santa
with all the lights.

- Bonus.
- Little Santa Claus.

Yeah.

I cannot believe
that you are married.

Um, nothing personal,

but this guy is such a guy.

- (sighs) And yet, somehow
you managed to slide -Okay.

under his protective knucklehead
radar and into his heart.

Because he's crazy about you.

We all are.

To Janet and Steve.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- Cheers. -Cheers.
- Cheers.

Come on.

♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh... ♪

The only thing that was missing
was our parents.

Yeah, and the name-calling
and the tears.

(chuckles)

Hey, you're upset.

No, I'm happy.

And they will be, too.

Someday.

You really know
how to plan a wedding.

You think so?

Mm-hmm.

I know this
isn't how you imagined it--

this gown, that cake.

Me, I always thought I'd be
in a panic on my wedding day.

How do you feel?

Never better.

♪ I saw in you ♪

♪ Something true ♪

♪ And my heart just opened... ♪

Here you go.

Oh, thank you.

Kel, I'm sorry.
Would you like a drink?

I'll get you one.

(chuckles)
I'll help him.

Kel.

I'm sorry about your mom
and Mel.

I know you're upset with me,
but as far as Mel goes,

he had nothing at all
to do with this whole thing.

He probably thinks
it's not cheating,

because, while he's paying
these women for his excitement,

it's just a job to them, right?

No one was victimized.

They were there
'cause they wanted to be.

(scoffs)
You know,

you have a very bright future
in porn.

Kel, just hear him out, please.

Okay, for example,

this one dancer named Trina--

she's got three little kids
at home.

Dancing at night puts food
on the table for them.

It also leaves her days free,

- so she can take care of them.
- Are you attempting

- to justify what you did?
- No.

But people make do.

They make mistakes.

(camera shutter clicks)

(chuckling)

(camera shutter clicks)

I want that.

I'll get you some.

No, not the cake, silly.

The whole picture.

- Hmm?
- Mm-hmm.

- All right.
- Where are you going?

I'm going to go coach Janet
in the bouquet toss, okay?

So, when it flies, you dive,
you push, you jump,

- do whatever you got to do, okay?

- Okay. Mm-hmm.
- All right.

Um...

excuse me.

She's a beautiful bride,
isn't she?

Doesn't hold a candle to you
on your wedding day.

How you doing?

I'm fine.

Listen, I'm sorry about the dog.

And if you want me
to meet your mom...

No. Um...

I'm sorry.

I know I've made
a lot of mistakes.

I-I never should have moved
into the hotel.

If you just didn't push, Gina...

I didn't move in, you know,
to leech off of you.

I just really wanted to be...

closer to you.

I just figured, if we were ever

going to end up
like Steve and Janet,

that maybe we should spend
more time together.

I don't know that we are.

I just need to be straight
with you about that.

You feel better now?

- Gina, hey, get... -No, just
stay away from me, Dylan.

DAVID: Oh, hey.
I just checked on the dog.

You know we got
to give her back, right?

Yeah. Can you take me somewhere?

No. I-I don't think that'd be
a very good idea.

I can't go back to the party,

and I'm not going to stay
at the hotel.

I can give you some cash
for a cab.

I don't...
I don't want your money.

I don't want
to just be your friend.

Gina, I'm really glad
I could be there for you today.

Truth is, I don't want

to hang out with you tonight
and get my hopes up again,

just to see you go back
with him tomorrow.

Thanks for setting up
on such short notice.

I, uh... I really appreciate it.

(laughter, indistinct chatter)

DYLAN:
Hey, you guys.

Hector has the, uh,
penthouse suite all ready to go.

Oh, well, thanks a lot,
but we've made other plans.

STEVE:
Say good night, Mrs. Sanders.

Good night, Mrs. Sanders.

- (laughter)
- No, no, no, no! No...

- Yeah. Right.
- Thank you.

Okay, come on. Bye-bye, guys.

- Yeah!
- Bye.

Yeah!

- DONNA: Perfect.
- KELLY: Yep.

Um, Matt is probably done

dropping off Reverend Neal
by now,

so I'm going to go back
to the Walsh house.

- I'll see you at the store
in the morning. -Sure. Uh, wait.

I thought you and Matt
were going

to sleep
at the beach apartment tonight.

I thought I would give you guys
a little time to settle in.

That was very nice of her.

It was.

I think she was surprised
about your take on Trina.

- Mmm.
- Mmm.

DONNA:
Oh. (chuckles)

I stirred up a batch
of my dairy-free eggnog.

(chuckles)

It... well, it's never too early

to get in the holiday spirit,
I always say.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

Now, oh, on Christmas Eve,

I always put reindeer antlers
on my cats.

(all laughing)

- Stop by if you're free.
- Mm-hmm.

DONNA:
Yeah, we will.

Thank you.

Mmm.

It's really good.

You know, I was just thinking--
maybe we could help her.

Uh, Trina, the dancer.

Trina doesn't actually exist.

Remember that movie Demi Moore
did when she played a stripper?

There's no Trina?

Yeah, there's lots
of Trinas out there.

But Kelly wouldn't listen to me,

so I told her the story
about this woman.

- Who you made up.
- You asked me

to patch things up with Kelly.

That's what I'm doing.

Who is it hurting, anyway?

To Steve and Janet.

I was glad you called,
'cause I was wondering, uh,

what did you tell the people
at the center? -Thanks.

That I'd been in a fender bender
and I need a few days off.

Patsy, my co-director,
came by the house.

My partner, Miles,
answered the door...

to our one-bedroom apartment.

Yeah, well, the old, uh,

(chuckles)
"he's just my roommate" thing

didn't work, huh?

You know, when I...
I said it was a car accident,

Patsy never even asked
if it was my fault,

but when I said
I'd been gay-bashed,

she looked at me
like I had asked for it.

Give her some time to adjust.

Oh, she suggested time, as well.

I said I'd be back to work
on Monday, but she...

urged me to take a few weeks--
minimum.

In fact, she insisted.

You knew that you'd have a fight
on your hands.

I need some sleep.

I got to look
for a job tomorrow.

(grunts)

Listen, uh... thanks.

Take it easy.

(door opens and closes)

(knocking on door)

I was on my way to Matt's,
and I realized,

there were no pictures taken
of me in my wedding gown.

Yeah, well, uh,
I never said I saw any pictures.

Yeah, you said you saw me
in my wedding gown.

But you weren't there.

You wore a, uh,
low-cut white thing.

It was... it was puffy.

That pretty much describes
just about every bride.

(sighs)

Okay.

Um, your hair was up.

It was curly.

I always thought
you should have left it down.

I can't believe you were there.

I flew in from Europe
at the last minute.

I was coming up the path

in the back of the church,
and I saw you.

You left without saying hello
to me or your friends?

Well, then it hit me.

I realized that you were going
to marry someone else,

and, uh...
I didn't want to see that.

Weren't you
on your way to Matt's?

Maybe I shouldn't
have brought that up, huh?

Probably not.