All language subtitles for Stella (2012) S06E01 (1080p NOW WEB-DL H264 SDR DDP 5.1 English - HONE)_track3_[eng]

I thought you'd gone for good.

You can't get rid of me that easily.

I don't regret it.

I don't regret any of it.

Do you?

Rob?

Rob?

Rob?

Rob?

Stella?

Stella, you're dreaming.

Oh.

I was, erm...

Oh, my God. What time is it?
She needs a feed.

It's OK. We've both already have
breakfast, haven't we, Hols?

Your mummy was a very fast asleep.

A bit like you.

- Was it Rob again?
- What?

In your dream.

Eh...

Yeah. Sorry.

What are you saying sorry for?

My conference call is in five
minutes.

- Are you kicking us out?
- I'm afraid
it's the only room available.

That's all right. We know when
we're not wanted, don't we, Hol?

He's bound to be on your mind,
you know, with it being a year.

11 months.

- I better wake Ben.
- No need.
He's already up and packing.

Oh. A bit ahead of himself,
isn't he?

Ben?

- Morning.
- Looking very casual,
Bob, for a funeral parlour.

Day off. Oh, bloody hell,
Stella, I'm a bag of nerves.

I've got my big a date tonight,
haven't I?

The Game Of Thrones fellow?

- Leslie, is it?
- Wesley, yeah. I've
been swotting up on my characters.

I've not even finished series one
yet.

Oh.

Ben, You're not leaving for a week.

Yeah, well, I want to be organised,
don't I?

Oh, look at him. He can't get away
from here quick enough.

Have you got a spare cheese grater?
No. What are you doing with my wok?

You're not having that. It's a Ken
- Hom.
- Oh, Mum, don't be so tight.

I'm a struggling student.

Well, you'll just have to struggle
without no stir-fried beef.

It was a wedding present, this,
from your uncle.

Wow. He splashed out.

Oh, God, Ben.
Oh, Don't start.

You've cried every day
since I've had my results.

I'm only going Cardiff.
I know, but you're my baby.

No, she is.

You know what I mean. Come here.

I'm so going to miss you,
Ben Morris.

Yeah, I'll miss you too, as it goes.

And I'm a bit surprised by that
because you're such a flipping nag.

So, can I have the wok
to remember you by?

No.
Stell, I've done it again.

Oh, what now?

Your poor maltreated grandmother,

God rest her Babycham-dependent
soul.

She's not dead, Auntie Bren.

They mislaid her false teeth
at the home.

Last seen inside the lying smile
of Betty Jean.

- Gross.
- Yeah, they had to tell her it
was bedtime just to get her to take
- them out.
- Who, Betty?

Yes, of course Betty.
Oh, bless her.

She was probably a bit confused,
that's all.

Hey, Ben, do you want a hot water
bottle? Only I've got a spare.

So I'm going up this morning to see
if we can sow a label on them

- or something.
- The false teeth?

Honestly, as if we haven't got
enough to contend with,

her turning 100 next month.
That is well old.

She'll get a telegram from the
- - Queen.
- Wicked!
- If she makes it.

Because the way things are going...

I mean, Eddard Stark, what a name.

- He's cool.
- Belonging to Gary Stark,
works up the Londis?

Well, according to this, he is Lord
of Winterfell and Warden of the
North.

Oh, heck, tonight is going to be a
wash-out.

So are you planning to visit your
ailing grandmother any time soon or

has she just been cast aside
like a Costa cappuccino cup?

Oh, hush your nonsense.

I took Holly up there last Tuesday,
she was right as rain.

And she's really annoyed with you.

Oh, what? Because of the shoehorn?

Well, now, that's not fair because
I told her I was taking it.

- What's a shoehorn.
- Stella?
What? What?

Good God, what's up with him.

He looks like he's seen a goat.
Michael, what's the matter?

I've just been speaking with
- Al Komadi.
- Who the Dickens is Alan
Macardie?

Shh. It's his boss, Mum.
Go on.

He wants me to go and work for him
out in Dubai for six months.

He wants us both to go.

It's a free accommodation, Stella,
in a really plush apartment.

Free childcare for Holly. You can be
a lady of leisure while I'm at the
office.

Yeah, but I don't know if I want to
be a lady of leisure.

I want to be in nurse, and I know
it's lovely, but the timing is
rubbish.

More than just lovely, Stella,
it's six months.

And what about Jackson? You'd be
happy not seeing him for months,

- would you? And Katie.
- Of course not.

They can come and visit. Katie,
she can bring her little brother,

- she'd love that.
- Michael, I have
worked so hard to get where I am.

I don't want to just throw it all
the way for a six-month jolly

in some plush Abu Dhabi apartment.

- It Dubai.
- Dubai then.

Just think about it before you
decide.

Please?

I'll talk to Cheryl.

See if I can get some sort of
sabbatical.

But I'm not promising nothing.

- Morning, Brenda.
- Morning.
Morning, Brenda.

Morning.

Mam?

Christ sake, Bren.
You'll put me off my shot.

Oh, dammit to hell!

Sorry, kid, I'm just a bit tetchy
today, that's all.

Bessy Simmons cleaned me out
on the blackjacks last night.

And he's been grinning all morning

like a what's the name,
what you call?

Now, what is it you want?
Because I can't lend you a penny.

Are you daft? I just wanted
to chat, that's all.

What the hell for?
I'm coming over tomorrow for my tea.

- I know.
- And for God's sake...
And I got a nice bit of...
Don't give me your bloody Soreen.

When is your brother coming to see
me?

Ken? He's in Tenerife.

So? I'm worth a two-hour flight
from Santa Cruz, aren't I?

It's not that, it's just...
Oh. I see.

He can't be arsed.

Well, that's nice, isn't it?
Look, never mind Ken,

I got something important to say.

Christ, you're not pregnant?

I've given this a lot of thought
and I won't take no for an answer.

Cheryl the lodger is moving out,
which means I've got a spare room.

So, I've decided that you are
to come and live with me.

No, let me finish,

I never felt right about you being
in a home, Mam,

you should be with your family,
surrounded by people who love you,

not living with strangers
who steal your teeth.

You'll have your own room, and
Stella is only across the road,

and I can look after you properly.

- No, sorry, Brenda, I couldn't.
- I
know you think I'm making a big
sacrifice.

What's a vibrant, active and busy
career woman like Auntie Brenda

want with an elderly mother
hanging around her neck,

dragging the very life-force out
of her soul on a daily basis?

But it's not like that.

It would be an honour to have you
live with me.

Get you out of this sad and lonely
place.

LAUGHTER

No. When I said I couldn't, I mean
I couldn't think of nothing worse.

You're up.

I appreciate the thought and that
but I'm happy where I am.

Stella Morris.

It's Jackson, actually. I got
- married.
- Hey, I haven't got time

for names and... names. And what have
you. The patient in bed nine

needs his BP doing sharpish.

Cheryl, I was wondering
if I could have a word?

I know you're going to say no,

and that's fine, but I said I'd
asked so...

Get on with it, Stella Jackson.
Right, OK, well,

Michael has been offered a job in
Dubai for six months and he wants me

to go with him. Obviously, that's
totally out of the question...

Yes.

As I thought.

At least I asked.

Yes. You can go.

I'll sort the necessary paperwork.

Oh. Right.

That's great.

Right, the special today is fish pie
and the soup is roast tomato.

I've got no beef casserole until
George the butcher can do his

delivery and we're totally out of
profiteroles.

Thank you, Alan. Little Alan.

- Bobs.
- Cheers.

Oh, will you test me?

I mean, I've just got to get a sense
of the world, that's all.

Otherwise what in the name of Anneka
Rice am I going to talk about on

- this damned date?
- Right, OK.
Let's see.

What is the nickname of
Tyrion Lannister?

- The Imp.
- Bull's-eye.

Now, how many kingdoms are there
in Westeros?

Six. No, seven, seven.

I'm afraid I'll have to take your
first answer.

Them's the rules, Boss.

OK, who is the exiled Princess
of the Targaryen dynasty?

Daenerys Targaryen,
also known as Stormborn.

I'll have a snakebite and black,
go easy on the bite.

How is your mother, Auntie Bren?

I rue the day that women gave birth
to me.

Heck, is she playing up?

I'm telling you, there is no
pleasing her. Sharp as a pen.

I'm there now, offering to take her
in, to put her up,

to give her a home,
and she just turned me down.

Oh, it can be easy, mind, being 99.

That as may be, but I've decided,
I'm having nothing more to do with
her.

Good God.

Greetings. I am Kalan.

Keeper of the Shroud.

SHE GASPS

Also known as Wesley Jenkins.

Hiya, Bobs.
Oh, This is getting on my fins.

- You're two hours early.
- I know.

I couldn't wait. Plus I've managed
to cadge a lift off my pal.

He's got a van.

So, come, my friend,
for the hour, it is upon us.

We're parked just by the Londis.

Oh. Oh, book.

Why didn't you let me give you a
- lift?
- Oh, it's all right.

I could do with the exercise,
to be honest.

I'm still trying to shift all this
- baby weight.
- Hello, gorgeous.

- - So did you ask her?
- Who?
- Cheryl?
Did you ask her about to Dubai?

Oh, bloody hell, Michael,
give me a chance.

Cooey. Glad I caught you.

I wanted to give this invitation to
Jackson's birthday party.

It's over at my Nanna Pat's this
Saturday.

- First I've heard of it.
- Oh, right.

- Nice.
- We're going to have fireworks,
a clown and everything.

Yeah, soz, Mike. I meant to mention
it this morning when you were
around.

OK, we've got to get the dinner on
so...

So? What do you think?

About the party? Yeah, nice.
No, Dubai.

Michael told me all about it.
Actually, Beyonce... What?

Oh, my God. It's amazing.

Said we can go out there as much as
we like, didn't you, Mike?

I can't wait, can you? What are you
going to wear?

I mean, technically speaking,
I got the best of four worlds.

One, me and Karl get on better now
than when we was together.

Two, need to pay for me and Jen
to go out there once a month.

And, three, I got the advantage
of being a single woman.

A deeply attractive single woman.

And what was number four?

Don't be pedantic.

That was nice.

Thanks.

OK.

Oh, Mam, there's basketball near
my halls.

And an Astroturf for five aside.
- Nice.
- Lovely.

So, who's going to take me down
next week when I move in?

- Well, I will, obviously.
- I'll take
- you.
- Oh, for God's sake, grow up.

What's the matter you?

I'll tell you what the matter is...
Your mother... Your stepfather...

has taken it upon himself for me
to go to Abu Dhabi for
- - six months.
- It's Dubai!
- Dubai!

And have told Beyonce about it...
Might be the possibility...

...and I haven't had five minutes
to make a decision... Maybe she'd
like to come out with Jackson.

And I am not sulking.

You so are. And I only mentioned to
Beyonce it might happen,

she shouldn't have said anything to
- you.
- You're mad not to go.

Dubai for six months.
- That's amazing.
- Exactly.

Stay out of it, Ben.
You have no idea.

You're so childish.
You're so childish.

HE MOUTHS

Thanks for picking me up.

I'd offer you some cash but I've
only got a few dirham.

I once knew a female ventriloquist
from Durham.

Norman, dirham, the money the Arabs
use.

I'll sort you in the week.
Fair enough.

- You back then?
- Eventually.

Damn flight was delayed.

How's my boy faring up out there?

I do miss my Karl,
I'll let you know that.

He's all right, is your boy Karl.
Don't worry about that.

Got himself a girlfriend.

- Fatima.
- Ah, he sent me a photo
on the Instagram.

I mean, she's nice enough, I
suppose, but it did get a bit

embarrassing,
him slathering all over her.

When he's got his ex-lover sat there
gawping like an egg.

Well, you've only got yourself
to blame.

Running off with a Moldavian
undertaker, like Ivan Slosh.

- Slos.
- Karl Morris have moved on.

- Deal with it.
- Charming.

Come on, babes.

Oh, Rob...

BABY STARTS TO CRY

Do you want me to see to her?

No, you're all right.

- My turn.
- You speaking to me now, then?

No.

Good God. What the hell are you
wearing?

Don't say nothing. I'm meant to be
Shagga, son of Dolph.

- Shagger.
- We had a few drinks,
me and Wes,

and as a treat he decided to do a
makeover on me because he was so

impressed with my vast knowledge
of Game Of Thrones.

He said he doesn't do it for
- everyone.
- Thank God for that.

- Hot chocolate?
- Aye, go on, then.

SHE SIGHS

Oh, what's up? Knackered, is it?

I don't know, Bobs. I am not
sleeping too well these days.

- Oh, babe.
- Me and Mike can keep
rowing trip about this Abu Dhabi
trip.

- Dubai.
- Dubai.

Well, I think you're a fool.

Bobs, I cant just up sticks
and go swanning off.

I've got my career to think about.

It's my graduation in a few weeks.

You, Stella Morris, have got a
pathological fear of leaving this

damn town and every time the chance
comes around you run a mile.

- I went to Bali.
- Yeah, for a
fortnight on your honeymoon.

And even then you had to phone home
every night.

Oh, go on. Live a little, Stell.

Cos you're no spring chicken,
let's be fair.

Do you have sex with him
dressed like that?

Moving out today, then, is it?

Affirmative, Nadine Bevan.

You've dropped something.

Does she want a little go
on donkey later?

No thanks, Glen. She was on the
camels every day in Abu Dhabi.

So a donkey will only disappoint.

Fair dos. Fair dos.

- Oh, Stell!
- Hi.

- When did you get back?
- Last night.

I had a wonderful time.

Me and Karl do get on better now
than when we was together.

And his girlfriend is good as gold.

Fatima. Likes to be called Fats.

But I feel it's a little near the
mark, giving she's not the slimmest.
Listen, I'd love to chat,

only I've got to get this one
to creche before I start my shift.

Oh, Michael, will you bring
a changing bag?

I'll take it, if you like?
- Huh?
- Yeah, go on.

It would be company for me and Jen.

She can come with us up the mother
- and toddler.
- Oh, no, you're all
right.

Only we've got our routine now.
And she does love creche.

Suit yourself. I was only being
neighbourly.

Here she is.

International jet setter.

Am I glad to see a friendly face
round here.

Chicken, I'd love to stay and chat
but I've got the viewing at nine.

No worries.

Give me a shout if you need a hand
up the parlour.

Michael, have you got it?

Hey, Stop shouting.

Hiya, Mike. I was just wondering...
Mohammed.

HE SPEAKS OTHER LANGUAGE

Stella just needs to ask her boss
about taking the time off.

- Oi, Jackson.
- Yeah. I'll let you
know as soon as she finds out. Bye.

Your release form. Sign it
and return it to me forthwith.

- What release form?
- Oh, it's nothing.
It's to do with my course, it is.

Cheryl? What release form?

You can't just take your wife up
the Middle East without no by your
leave.

She's going to need to inform the
appropriate authorities of return
dates,

- and what have you.
- What, so Stella
did ask you about Dubai?

And be warned, you're going to need
a shedload of vaccinations.

Abu Dhabi is rife.

It's Dubai. Great.

So you did ask her and she did say
yes, you just clearly don't want to
go.

Michael...

- Nice one, young Ben.
- Yeah.
I'm on a roll today.

Ah, the confidence of youth.

So, University beckons.
Yeah, can't wait.

Did you go to university?
Only the university...

University of life. Yeah, I knew you
was going to say that.

Fish pie?
That's me, thanks.

- And a cheeseburger.
- Thanks, love.

With no bun, no burger
and no gherkin.

Yeah, well, my mam doesn't eat even
bread, or meat, and she doesn't like
the taste of fucking gherkin.

- Got a problem?
- Well, it's
essentially two slices of tomato and
some cheese. Honestly,

what's the point?

I'm knocking off now in five.
OK.

You will miss your young comrade,
I imagine.

Yeah. I feel a bit bad leaving him
behind. I mean, Pontyberry is not

exactly the most buzzing place
on Earth, is it?

You'll be surprised what goes on
behind closed doors in this here
town.

Top left.

I could do with some help behind the
bar, please.

Coachload of cheerleaders just
- arrived.
- On my way, Captain.

Another time, Benny boy.

Oh, and, Ben,

if I don't see you before you go
I'll leave you with this.

It's a wise man who can tell the
time and a fool who knows how to
waste it.

Right. Let's get out of this
godforsaken place.

EXCITED CHATTER

Come on, Bren. Hurry up.

All right!
I'm going as fast as I can.

I would have been quicker walking.
Don't let me stop you.

Oh, well, that's nice, isn't it?

Making your wheelchair-bound ridden
mother get up and walk like Lazarus

- at a fun run.
- You're not
wheelchair-bound.

Come for your tea, have you?

Don't shout, Glen. I've got a
hangover the size of Caerphilly.

Look, that's Stella's fella.

Cooey! I said, my girl got a special
visitor today, we have.

Nana Kosh, how are you?
I haven't seen you for ages.

PHONE RINGS
I'm surprised you know who I am.

Seeing as you didn't see fit
to invite me to your wedding.

Well, it was a very quiet affair
and several months ago now.

- Hi, Stell.
- I need to talk to you.
- Are you on your own?
- Nearly.

Look, you better say hi
to your gran.

Nana Kosh. Hiya.

SHE SCREAMS
Tell him, tell him, Bren!

He's pointing a gun at me!
No, no, it's a mobile phone.

- Look. Stella.
- Take it away
or I'll call the cops.

Hurry, kid.

Michael...

- That went really well.
- She's a law
unto herself, is my nan.

Listen, I want to apologise for
being a pain in the arse

and for lying about Cheryl.
I wouldn't call it lying.

Just an omission of fact.

Ever the solicitor, eh?

Sorry, I interrupted
your grovelling apology.

It was just all going a bit fast
for me, that's all.

But I've been thinking, and I have
decided I'm being a dick.

Much as I hate to admit that
everyone else is right and I'm
wrong,

it is a fantastic opportunity.

Are you saying
what I think you're saying?

I'm saying it looks like you and me
are off up the Middle East.

Stella, that is brilliant.

- God, I love you.
- Yeah, well,

I thought it might do me good to get
away from Pontyberry for a bit.

Put an end to all those
sleepless nights and stuff.

It will stop, you know.

These are the dreams you have,

they are just part of the grieving
process,

I suppose. Rob was a really
important person in your life.

It's not like you're going to just
forget all about him.

- I know.
- I tell you what,

why don't I cook us a meal tonight
to celebrate Dubai?

I'll do something really special and
send Ben and Bobby off so we have

- the place to ourselves.
- Yeah, OK.

No, it won't be the sausage balls.
I told you, that was a mistake.

- Stella.
- Listen, I better go.

I'll see you later. But please don't
let the surprise be that you ARE

doing sausage balls after all.

Hello, stranger.

He's 14 now.
God, he looks so much better.

When did you first meet him?
- Two Christmases ago?
- Yeah.

Been in remission nearly a year now.

He gave me a proper run for my money
when I was on his ward.

Well, he's even more stubborn these
days.

Gets into a few fights,
that kind of thing.

You've got a lot to be angry about,
bless him.

How long are you going to be?
I'm well bored.

Stella, it wasn't a complete
accident that we bumped into you
today.

I did 24 specials today
and 13 burgers.

- Nice.
- I've turned things around on
the bar meal front.

But no-one truly appreciates
what I'm trying to do.

You know, you could always move to
Cardiff like me.

I know I'll be in halls, but you
could get a job there and a flat
nearby.

Ben, you're going to make loads
of new friends at uni.

You won't want me hanging around
like a cat in a bin.

- Yes, I will.
- No, you won't.

You will have new mates with names
like Gecko and Jackass,

who do things like base jumping and
- cheese rolling.
- Shut up.

Wish we were still in school
sometimes. Do you?

- Benny boy.
- Yeah.

Listen, Ben, you and Bobby need to
make yourself scarce tonight.

I want some private time with
- Stella.
- Where am I meant to go?

I don't know. Nadine's.
Youth club or something.

Cheers, mate.

Youth club?

- This is me and Jen by the pool.
- Yep.

And that's your dad with Jen by the
- pool.
- Yep.

And that's...
All three of you by the pool. Yep.

Nadine, these cupboards make Old
Mother Hubbard look Mary Berry.

You haven't even got so much as an
- onion.
- Yeah, well, I've had more

important things on my mind since
flying halfway across the world
yesterday morning.

Phone Gerraldo's and order a pizza.

It's not my fault Michael's
kicked you both out, is it?

I'm not having no scabby pizza
from Gerraldo's.

- I'll text Little Al.
- Oh, tell him to
bring some of that fish pie that you
do in the pub.

- It is to die for.
- Yeah, right, well,

while you're waiting you can look at
the rest of these.

Now, this one,
this was ever so funny.

This is me and Jen having breakfast!

That's Karl...
Carl and Jen having breakfast.

DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

- Stell?
- Mike? The door was open.
We was just passing and...

Oh, my God. What are you wearing?
What? It's just something silly.

Look, what do you want?

Well, I wanted to talk about Dubai,
but, I'm sorry,

I just can't take you serious
- dressed like that.
- What about Dubai?

He's wearing a dress.
You're wearing a fucking dress.

Shut up!
Yeah, shut up!

All right. Keep your cock on.
- Where's Jackson?
-Nana Pat's.

The thing is, I was wondering...
Leave it.

When we come to visit, like,

would it be OK for His Lordship
to come and all?

I am the kid's stepdad, so...

No, you're not. You're his mother's
current boyfriend.

Yeah, well, we're hoping it might
get a bit more serious than that,
- aren't we, babe?
- Yeah.

No, no, hang on. I'm not paying for
him to come out.

I'm not even sure I'm paying for you
- - to come out.
- What?
- Well,

Katie's perfectly capable.
- She can bring Jackson out.
- No way,

I'm not letting my son travel
halfway around the world with
the sister he hardly ever sees.

That's out of order, mate. She's his
- mother.
- Can we discuss this another
time? It's really not convenient.

Michael?

- What's going on?
- What it is,
I just want to sort out...

Why are you dressed like that?

Oh, my God, it was supposed to be a
bloody surprise. Just a bit of...

Who's this?

Michael, you remember Billy?

- Yeah.
- Well, he's come to stay
with us for a few days.

Great.

The flight's booked for the 20th.

- Yeah.
- And I was thinking,
you've got Bobby here, of course,

looking after the house,
so all good on that front.

- Exactly.
- I'm so glad you changed
your mind.

Any news yet about Billy's new
- foster parents?
- No. Not yet. Hush.

OK, sorry. Just... Christ, Michael,

the poor kid has been shoved from
children's home to foster parent

and back again. I want him to feel
welcome here,

not like some inconvenience.
Stell, do you want a hand?

No, it's fine.

So, who's your art teacher, then?
Mr Jeffries we had.

Jurassic Jeff? He's about 110.

Yeah, we had him.

I made this pottery fireman
in year eight, I did.

Oh, bless.
His arm fell off in the kiln.

Who, Mr Geoffrey's?
Yeah.

I made this vase thing
for my foster mother.

- And then she got ill.
- Oh.

- That's rank, mate.
- Don't mind that.

- More bacon anyone?
- Oh, yeah.

- Billy?
- No.

I hope you two are coming to
Jackson's party this afternoon.

Sorry, mate. You're on your own with
that one.

Ben! Michael needs moral support to
contend with Beyonce's family.

- God help us.
- Do I have to?

Yeah, come on. It'll be fun.

OK. I'm going on the PlayStation.
OK.

Not the friendliest of kids, is he?
It's quite normal, that is.

DOORBELL RINGS

Oh, thank God you're cocking in.

- What's the matter?
- You'll never
believe what's happened.

Oh, my God. Is it Jackson?
- Is he all right?
- What's happened?

It's the clown. He's cancelled.
This one is in pieces.

- What clown?
- For Jackson's party.
He fucking cancelled on me.

Colin the cocking Clown.

- Honestly, do you have to?
- You made
it sound as though it's a disaster.
It is a disaster.

We've got 43 of my bastard family
showing up to this party.
Including my brother's girl,

who thinks she is the bee's bastard
knees.

So if we've got no entertainment for
the kids will never hear the end of

- it from her.
- Jackson's one, for
God's sake. He doesn't need a clown.

Oh, well, that is just typical of
- you.
- Excuse me...

ALL TALK AT ONCE

EXCUSE ME!

If you're looking for a clown,
look no further.

- Why?
- Don't worry.
You won't have to pay me.

I'll do it as a favour.

- Do what, Nadine?
- Circus skills
and clowning techniques.

I done a course.

Cock.

He's a lovely boy, is Billy.

Bit of a handful, but then who can
blame him?

He's been through such crap
you wouldn't believe.

And this one has started teething,
I reckon.

Her cheeks are red. She's got a bit
grouchy, haven't you?

Oh, she's so sweet, Rob.

You'd really like her.

Actually, no.

You'd love her.

- That was unexpected.
- Hmm.

You don't really think that.

Mam!

What this, Olympics come to
Pontyberry, is it?

I thought these two needed a bit of
wind in their Saturday sails.

He's going to give me some boxing
lessons and all.

- Oh, nice.
- It's not fair. Some of us
had bacon and eggs this morning.

I'm only thinking of you and that
unhealthy student lifestyle you've
got ahead of you. Right, go on.

Sprint to that big statue thing
- - and back.
- What?
- Ready?

Twice!

Billy reminds me of me at his age.

What, troubled, sulky and defensive?

Oh, yeah, I wonder
where he got that from?

Rob wasn't defensive, he was just...

Annoyingly private.

And I still think about him 100
times a day.

Yeah.

- This is ridiculous.
- Loser.
Come on, old man.

He's a right little Mo Farah,
isn't he?

You know when Rob came back
last year the first time?

Yeah, for Sophie's christening.
Yeah.

Well, we, erm...

Mam?

We talked a lot about how proud
we were of you.

Really proud.

Thanks.

Right.

Let's get going.

This party starts in an hour.

Excuse me, Mama Pat?

- I'm Nadine Bevan.
- Eh?

- I'm the clown.
- Eh?

Right, well, I'll go inside
and make a start.

Hiya, Nana Pat. How is your leg?
Oh, bastard killing me, Auntie Bren.

Right, then. This you in there,
- then, is it?
- Aye.

Is it true you were in school with
her?

No comment.

Got a cocking licence for that
thing?

I could ask you the same question.

Nana bastard Pat.

- Give me strength.
- Don't be such
a snob, Michael Jackson.

They're your family now.
Well, part of it, anyway.

All right, well, you're my wife,

ergo, you're part of their family,
- too, now.
- Tou-bloody-che.

Is Nana Pat
actually kissing that man?

As in properly kissing him?

Yeah, she properly is.

Mike. Oh, my God. Thanks for coming.
All right, all right.

Who's out there?
It's Michael, Nana Pat.

- Michael Caine?
- No.
- Michael Shane?
- No.

It's Michael. My ex.

Eh, Beyonce, Michael is not your
bloody ex, thank you very much.

Let's not fight, not in Jackson's
special day and in front of his
little sister and that.

My God, she looks like Jackson,
doesn't she, Mike?

Do you think?

One of the family. And that is what
today is all about.

And I want to welcome you into mine
with open arms and legs, here, Mike.

Only joking.
I have already had a few.

Right, coming in, then? Olivia,
get your Uncle Mike a can.

Now, Mike, I've been thinking about
getting Jackson's ear pierced.

- No!
- Don't be ridiculous.
As a birthday present.

- No!
- Don't be ridiculous.

I voted leave, I did.

And me.

Brexit all the bastard way.

Exactly. What the hell have Europe
ever done for Wales?

Do you want a list?

All right. Keep your cock on.

- No, he never.
- Yes, he did.

- - No, he never.
- I was there!
- No, he
cocking never. No, he cocking never.

You're off your head.
Off your bastard head.

Oh, what's the point?

All right, calm down.

Any more news from Marge, then,
Glen?

Aye. She sent me a letter last week,
she did.

Oh, good.

Told me to get on with my life.

Oh, dear.

There's not really...

- No, thanks.
- No, thank you.

You OK?Yeah, yeah.

Let me have him!

Where's the dirty bastard
got my daughter up the duff?

Oh, Dad, man, shut up. You'll scare
the living shite out of him.

Mikey, this is my dad, Clive.

Michael. Come here, my son.

- Sorry.
- Don't worry. I've got to go
change Holly.

Clive can come and sit here.
Stella, no, don't worry...

Christ, look at me. I'm filling up.

Go and get my dad a can.

Actual real tears!

Hey, hey.

I can see where my grandson
gets his good looks from now.

You cheeky sod. He's my kid and all.

You have been such a good girl
today, haven't you?

Yes, you have.

Getting a bit lively down there now,
it is.

Michael just stop Rhian
- from doing a strip.
- Oh, good God.

Swig of a rocket fuel?
No, you're all right.

Me and Zoe are going to head off
in a bit before it all gets out of
- hand.
- Good idea.

Pass me them socks.

Come here. I'll do this.
Have five minutes.

I forget you're a dab hand
at all this daddy stuff.

I can change a nappy with one hand
behind my back and my eyes closed.

Whilst baking a cake.

Such a little smiler, isn't she?

Proper placid, like Sophie was.

Have you seen this?
What?

I never noticed that before.

She's got the same weird thing
with her toes.

See how it bends over that one.

- - Yeah.
- Like mine.
- Like yours.

And Rob's.

Stella!

Stella, for God's sake,
don't leave me down there.

- The man's a maniac.
- Where did you
think you are going, Mikey boy?

Come on. We're doing the cake.
And I've got a cracking speech.

Stella!

Mam...

Is Holly Rob's baby?

I don't know.

Oh, Jesus.

Stella!

Coming.

Hello, stranger.

Dad! You've arrived!

Save the niceties,

we've got a surprise party
to plan for our mother.

What's wrong with daddy's little
girl? Hmm?

Oh, you are so gross.

Hang on a minute, Jack.

I've got a business proposal.

What's in there?

You've got to tell him.
You know you do.

Subtitles by Ericsson

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