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( upbeat piano theme playing )
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00:00:06,590 --> 00:00:08,090
ANNOUNCER:
Last season on Wings:
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Will you marry me?
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Yes.
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Brian, when are you gonna
get it through your head?
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No matter how many
cute little gimmicks you try,
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we're not gonna
get back together.
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It's over.
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Fine. It's over.
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'Cause I've had
enough humiliation
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to last me a lifetime.
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I'm done.
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Oh, good.
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The Cupid-gram.
( claps hands )
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Talking about
Helen and Lynch.
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They're getting married.
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What?
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I think I said that
pretty clearly.
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Listen, Helen,
um...
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I just--
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I just want to say
congratulations again.
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00:00:43,630 --> 00:00:46,130
You know, I-- I'm sure that you
and Davis will be really happy.
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Yeah, we are.
Hm.
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I-- I think that
I really picked
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the right man.
Mm-hm.
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I just made a big,
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big mistake
letting Alex get away.
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00:01:04,150 --> 00:01:06,150
Oh, come on,
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Joey, talk to me.
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Yow!
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( mellow theme playing )
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( whistling )
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Morning.
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Morning?
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I find you in bed
with Helen last night,
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and all you can say
is "morning"?
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( grunts )
Those are for Helen.
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I-I-Is that a heart?
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Are-- Are you making
heart-shaped pancakes?
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They're her favorite.
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( chuckles )
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Joe, I want you to wipe
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that inane grin
off your face
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and tell me how you
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and Helen ended up
in bed together.
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You broke my heart.
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Look, I don't know
how it happened.
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She was on her way
to New York.
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She stopped by here
last night
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on the way to the airport
to borrow my travel iron.
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So I gave it to her.
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I meant the travel iron.
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Oh. All right.
Well, well, go on. Go on.
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Well, you know, there's
not much more to say.
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Uh, you know,
we wished each other luck,
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00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:08,210
gave each other
a kiss goodbye
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and fell into bed
like dogs. Heh.
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( fridge door
closes )
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Boy, huh?
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You and Helen.
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All these years you two guys
parading around as friends...
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this hot, steaming passion
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raging underneath
the surface.
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Smoldering sexual tinderbox
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just waiting for a spark
to come along and--
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You slept alone again
last night, huh?
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Oh, yeah.
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Heck, look. Brian,
don't give up on Alex.
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You know, there's still
a chance it could work out.
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Yeah.
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Well, hell,
I'm not really worried.
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And I've actually come up with
a great plan to get her back.
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See, every time she goes out
for the morning paper,
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I'll be there.
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Every time she goes out
to lunch, I'll be there.
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Every time she pulls
the shades down at night,
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I'll be there.
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00:02:50,750 --> 00:02:52,260
And every time
you come up for parole,
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I'll be there.
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00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:54,760
Look, man, l--
Let me give you
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00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,260
just a little bit of advice.
Yeah.
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If you really want to get Alex
back, you got to play it cool.
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Let her come to you.
Oh, I don't know.
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No, hey. No,
trust me on this one.
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Look, last night Helen
was this close
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to marrying Lynch.
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This morning,
she is eating at Joe's.
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Ha. And why?
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Because I played it cool.
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00:03:11,770 --> 00:03:13,280
Bye, Joe. Thanks for
the travel iron.
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00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:15,280
He-- Hey, Helen,
where are you going?
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Uh, New York
to see Davis.
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W-- Why?
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He's my fiancé.
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Helen, wait.
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Joe!
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Undies.
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( mellow theme playing )
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Okay, breakfast
is here.
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What took you so long?
Oh. Oh, it's about time.
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I ordered the muffin.
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They were out. So instead
I got you a bear claw.
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00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,310
Um, I ordered
the scrambled eggs.
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They were out. So instead
I got you a bear claw.
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Well, mine's easy.
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I ordered the bear claw.
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Fay got the last one.
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Heh. So I got you toast.
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Oh, it's just my luck.
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I'm having toast for lunch.
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I suppose we have got Chappel
to thank for this.
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She goes to New York, marries
a rich guy in a penthouse,
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we got to scrounge for
our breakfast every morning.
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Oh, well, I think
it's wonderful
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00:04:06,330 --> 00:04:07,830
that Helen's finally
getting married.
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And I bet there's gonna be
a really fancy society wedding.
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ANTONIO: Yeah.
I can't wait to go.
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Yeah, me neither. Me--
I-I've got to get my tux back
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from my cousin, Giacomo.
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Oh, I forgot.
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He buried his father in it.
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Maybe I could--
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Nah.
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Better just rent a new one.
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What makes you think
she's gonna want you two there?
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Why wouldn't she?
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Oh, you're gonna
have a lot in common
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with her rich friends.
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Mr. Gold Card,
meet Mr. Green Card.
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00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:50,370
Of course we'll be
invited. Won't we?
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Oh, absolutely.
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We're her friends.
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Well, her friends from work.
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That's right. There's always
a "friends from work" table,
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isn't there?
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00:05:01,380 --> 00:05:03,390
Oh, yeah. And they'll
have us hidden
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00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:05,890
in some dark corner
where everyone kicks our chairs
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00:05:05,890 --> 00:05:07,890
on the way to the can.
That's right.
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00:05:07,890 --> 00:05:09,890
That's right. And the only time
Helen will talk to me
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is when she needs someone
to dance
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with her fat Aunt Rose.
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You know? I-I-I never
get the hot cousin.
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You know, it's always me
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and the 300-pound woman
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in support hose
doing the Hokey Pokey.
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Well, it didn't take very long
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for money to turn
her pretty little head.
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Hi. I had a change
of plans.
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Leaving now. Bye now.
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Now, listen,
I'm telling you right now,
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your fat aunts
dance alone.
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You bet. Bye.
Okay.
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Chappel, what are you
still doing here?
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00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:36,920
I thought you left
last night.
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00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:38,920
Oh, well, you know,
it was the funniest story.
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Um-- Oh,
get this.
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( forced laugh )
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Uh, I didn't.
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Roy, when's your next
flight to New York?
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Well, it's the funniest story.
Get this: It's sold out.
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( chuckles )
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Bump somebody.
Maybe I could bump somebody.
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00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,940
U-uh, this engagement
really agrees with you.
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00:05:54,940 --> 00:05:56,940
You're positively
glowing.
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00:05:59,940 --> 00:06:01,440
Uh, no, I'm really
not glowing.
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00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,950
There's absolutely
no reason to glow.
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Oh-ho-ho.
You know, Chappel,
she's right.
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You look
kind of flushed.
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00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:10,450
No, no. I-I-I'm
really not.
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00:06:10,450 --> 00:06:12,960
Helen. You know, you--
You look...
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Please don't say
I'm glowing.
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No, you look like
you just had sex.
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( laughs )
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00:06:24,470 --> 00:06:25,970
No, I'm just glowing.
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Listen, Helen, I was gonna
send this to you in New York,
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but since you're here,
I can give it to you now. I--
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00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:35,480
I made a little
engagement present for you.
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And I did a little
cross-stitching last night. I--
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00:06:38,980 --> 00:06:40,980
See. "Helen and
Davis Forever."
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00:06:40,980 --> 00:06:41,980
( snickers )
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"Forever."
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Thanks, Lowell. I'll--
I'll treasure it always.
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Well, now, Lowell,
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I think that's
just amazing.
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00:06:49,490 --> 00:06:51,490
How did you ever
do that in one night?
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00:06:51,490 --> 00:06:54,500
Well, I have to admit
I didn't do it by myself.
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00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:57,000
You know, my cousin Bevo
helped me with the border.
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You know, for once
that extra thumb
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of his came in handy.
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00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,510
Roy, where's
the ticket already?
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It's coming. It's coming.
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00:07:04,010 --> 00:07:06,010
Just like the rich.
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00:07:06,010 --> 00:07:08,010
Everything's got to be
now, now, now.
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00:07:10,510 --> 00:07:14,020
Well, well, if it isn't
the blushing bride herself.
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00:07:14,020 --> 00:07:16,520
You know, if one more person
says that I'm blushing
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00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:18,520
or I'm glowing, I'm gonna
kick them right in the--
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00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:21,020
Reverend Saunders.
Hello, how are you?
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00:07:21,020 --> 00:07:24,030
Fine. I was so happy to hear
you're getting married.
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00:07:24,030 --> 00:07:26,530
You know, I'd be
honored if you'd let me
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00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:27,530
perform
the ceremony.
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00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:29,030
( scoffs )
Fat chance.
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00:07:29,030 --> 00:07:30,530
She's probably
booked Billy Graham.
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00:07:32,540 --> 00:07:34,040
After all,
I've known you
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00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:35,540
ever since you were
a little girl.
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00:07:35,540 --> 00:07:38,040
Ah, I can still see
you sitting
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00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,040
in church in your
pretty white dress,
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00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:41,540
Bible clutched
in your little hands,
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00:07:41,540 --> 00:07:44,050
the very picture
of innocence.
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00:07:45,550 --> 00:07:47,550
That's really sweet of you.
I'm going straight to hell.
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00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:48,550
JOE:
Helen.
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00:07:48,550 --> 00:07:51,050
Helen, don't--
Don't leave.
Oh.
212
00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:52,050
We have got to
talk about this.
213
00:07:52,050 --> 00:07:53,560
Joe, there's nothing
to talk about.
214
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:54,560
Roy, the ticket.
Thank you.
215
00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:57,560
What, y-you call what happened
last night nothing?
216
00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:59,060
Uh...
U-U-Uh,
217
00:07:59,060 --> 00:08:00,560
what happened
last night?
218
00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:01,560
Uh, nothing.
Nothing.
219
00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:03,070
Could you please
give me my damn ticket?
220
00:08:03,070 --> 00:08:05,570
In a second. What did
happen last night? Sh--
221
00:08:05,570 --> 00:08:07,070
Nothing!
222
00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,570
Now, look, listen. You cannot
just run out on me like this.
223
00:08:09,570 --> 00:08:11,570
Joe, would you quit making
such a big deal about this?
224
00:08:11,570 --> 00:08:13,580
What we did last night was
just sex! It was nothing else!
225
00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:15,580
It was just sex!
That's all it was! Sex!
226
00:08:21,580 --> 00:08:23,090
Well...
227
00:08:23,090 --> 00:08:25,090
don't I feel
the perfect fool.
228
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:35,100
( lively theme playing )
229
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,100
Helen...what we had
last night
230
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:40,600
was a lot more than just sex.
Joe...
231
00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:43,110
I have two words
for you:
232
00:08:43,110 --> 00:08:44,110
civil ceremony.
233
00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:48,610
Well, call me
old-fashioned,
234
00:08:48,610 --> 00:08:50,610
but in my day,
the night you got engaged,
235
00:08:50,610 --> 00:08:52,620
you slept with
your fiancé.
236
00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:57,120
Aeromass announces
the departure of flight 19
237
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,120
to New York.
238
00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,620
Due to FAA regulations,
239
00:08:59,620 --> 00:09:01,620
there will be no smoking
240
00:09:01,620 --> 00:09:03,630
or sex while in flight.
241
00:09:05,130 --> 00:09:06,630
Think you can
make it, Chappel?
242
00:09:06,630 --> 00:09:08,130
( snickers )
243
00:09:14,140 --> 00:09:16,140
Tsk. Look, Joe,
I have to go.
244
00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:17,140
No, no. You can't go.
245
00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:19,640
We've got to talk about this--
Give me the ticket.
246
00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:24,150
Joe, what are you
doing? I have to go.
247
00:09:24,150 --> 00:09:25,650
Hey-- Look-- J--
Talk to me, Helen.
248
00:09:25,650 --> 00:09:28,650
Am I crazy or did something
incredible happen last night?
249
00:09:28,650 --> 00:09:31,150
Oh, that?
250
00:09:31,150 --> 00:09:32,660
Yeah, that.
251
00:09:32,660 --> 00:09:35,160
Well, that was...um,
252
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:36,660
two old friends...
253
00:09:36,660 --> 00:09:38,660
saying goodbye.
254
00:09:38,660 --> 00:09:40,660
When my friend Bill left
the island, we just shook hands.
255
00:09:40,660 --> 00:09:43,170
Nobody dug their nails
in anyone's back.
256
00:09:44,670 --> 00:09:47,170
Joe, last night
was a big mistake.
257
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:48,670
That's all it was.
258
00:09:48,670 --> 00:09:51,670
I am engaged
to Davis.
( sighs )
259
00:09:51,670 --> 00:09:53,180
Because we spend
one night together,
260
00:09:53,180 --> 00:09:54,180
I'm supposed to
forget about him?
261
00:09:55,180 --> 00:09:56,180
Pfft, yeah.
262
00:09:57,180 --> 00:09:59,180
I got a plane
to catch.
Helen--
263
00:09:59,180 --> 00:10:01,180
Oh, Joe. What do
you want from me?
264
00:10:01,180 --> 00:10:02,690
Helen, you j--
You can't leave.
265
00:10:02,690 --> 00:10:04,190
What about us?
266
00:10:04,190 --> 00:10:05,190
What "us"?
267
00:10:05,190 --> 00:10:06,190
We tried "us"
years ago.
268
00:10:06,190 --> 00:10:07,190
We broke up.
269
00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:09,190
Oh. All couples break up.
270
00:10:09,190 --> 00:10:10,690
We fought all the time.
All couples fight.
271
00:10:10,690 --> 00:10:12,200
I drove my jeep
through your office.
272
00:10:12,190 --> 00:10:14,200
All couples--
Yeah, you did.
273
00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,200
What the hell
were you thinking?
274
00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:17,700
I'm marrying Davis.
Goodbye.
275
00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:19,700
Wait-- Helen.
Listen to me.
276
00:10:19,700 --> 00:10:20,700
If you were so sure
about him,
277
00:10:20,700 --> 00:10:22,210
last night never
would of happened.
278
00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:24,710
Last night never happened.
How can you say that?
279
00:10:24,710 --> 00:10:26,710
That's my story,
and I'm sticking to it.
280
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:29,210
All right, okay.
Okay, okay. Fine. Fine.
281
00:10:29,210 --> 00:10:31,210
If you can stand here
and look me right in the eye,
282
00:10:31,210 --> 00:10:33,220
and honestly tell me
that you love him...
283
00:10:33,220 --> 00:10:34,720
( sighs )
284
00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:36,220
...I'll-- I'll step aside.
285
00:10:36,220 --> 00:10:38,220
I love him.
Let me put that
a different way.
286
00:10:39,220 --> 00:10:40,720
Joe...
287
00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:43,230
I really want this.
288
00:10:43,230 --> 00:10:45,230
So if you care about me,
289
00:10:45,230 --> 00:10:47,730
if you want to see me happy...
290
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:50,230
if you love me...
291
00:10:50,230 --> 00:10:52,740
you won't stand in my way.
292
00:10:59,740 --> 00:11:00,740
( airplane flying overhead )
293
00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:05,750
Aeromass announces
the final boarding call
294
00:11:05,750 --> 00:11:08,250
for flight 19
to New York.
295
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:19,760
Look, uh...
296
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:20,760
glad you guys
are still here.
297
00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:22,770
Uh...didn't have
much time
298
00:11:22,770 --> 00:11:25,770
for the alterations,
but, you know...
299
00:11:25,770 --> 00:11:28,270
let me be the first
to congratulate you.
300
00:11:31,270 --> 00:11:33,280
Bye, Joe.
301
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:34,780
Goodbye, Helen.
302
00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:40,280
You okay?
303
00:11:41,780 --> 00:11:43,790
Do I look okay?
304
00:11:48,790 --> 00:11:51,790
How you doing?
Oh. I-- I've been better.
305
00:11:51,790 --> 00:11:53,300
Would you like to
talk about it, dear?
306
00:11:53,300 --> 00:11:55,800
No. No, Fay. Really, not--
Not right now.
307
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,800
You sure?
I'm a good listener.
308
00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:58,800
Hey, hey, hey.
Ca-- Hey--
309
00:11:58,800 --> 00:11:59,800
Will you guys
just back off?
310
00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:02,300
Give the man
a little air, all right?
311
00:12:02,300 --> 00:12:04,310
The last thing
he needs is a bunch
312
00:12:04,310 --> 00:12:05,810
of people yammering
his ear off
313
00:12:05,810 --> 00:12:06,810
with a lot of...
314
00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:08,310
cliché advice.
315
00:12:10,310 --> 00:12:11,810
Hey, thanks.
316
00:12:12,820 --> 00:12:14,320
( sighs )
317
00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:15,820
But you know,
time heals all wounds.
318
00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:20,320
There's a lot of--
Lot of fish in the sea.
319
00:12:21,820 --> 00:12:23,830
And whatever doesn't kill you
makes you stronger.
320
00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:26,830
All right, all right.
Look, I know it's tough,
321
00:12:26,830 --> 00:12:28,830
but you cannot
let it get to you.
322
00:12:28,830 --> 00:12:30,830
I mean, take this thing
with me and Alex.
323
00:12:30,830 --> 00:12:32,840
Oh-- A-A-Alex.
324
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:34,840
What, heh--?
What about her?
325
00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:36,840
Um, when I gassed up
her chopper this morning, uh,
326
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,840
she gave me a letter
to give you.
327
00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:42,850
Uh, I can't read it.
328
00:12:42,850 --> 00:12:43,850
You-- You read it.
329
00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:45,350
Okay.
330
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:48,850
Okay.
331
00:12:48,850 --> 00:12:49,850
"Dear Brian,
332
00:12:49,850 --> 00:12:51,850
by the time you read this,
I'll be gone."
333
00:12:51,850 --> 00:12:54,360
Gone? What-- What
does she mean "gone"?
334
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,360
"I'm leaving
the island for good.
335
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:57,860
"What we had was wonderful,
336
00:12:57,860 --> 00:12:59,860
"but we both know
it's over.
( sighs )
337
00:12:59,860 --> 00:13:02,870
"I know if I stayed, we'd
probably get back together,
338
00:13:02,870 --> 00:13:06,370
but it would be
a big mistake."
339
00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:07,870
Even though you are
340
00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:10,370
the most handsome man
I've ever known.
341
00:13:10,370 --> 00:13:11,370
She said that?
342
00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:14,880
Yeah, I threw that in.
343
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:21,380
Y-you looked like you needed
some good news with the bad.
344
00:13:22,890 --> 00:13:24,390
"We just had
too many problems,
345
00:13:24,390 --> 00:13:25,890
"and I don't think
you're ready
346
00:13:25,890 --> 00:13:29,890
for a mature,
adult relationship."
347
00:13:29,890 --> 00:13:32,400
Even though you are
one heck of a bowler.
348
00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:35,900
That bowler thing:
349
00:13:35,900 --> 00:13:38,400
uh...her?
350
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:39,900
Me.
351
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:42,910
"Please don't try to find me.
352
00:13:42,910 --> 00:13:44,410
"It's better this way.
353
00:13:44,410 --> 00:13:46,410
"And always remember, Brian,
354
00:13:46,410 --> 00:13:47,910
I love you."
355
00:13:50,910 --> 00:13:51,910
You?
356
00:13:51,910 --> 00:13:52,920
Her.
357
00:13:54,420 --> 00:13:57,420
What the heck. I don't
say it enough either.
358
00:13:57,420 --> 00:13:58,920
( groans )
359
00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:01,420
My God. Alex--
360
00:14:01,420 --> 00:14:02,930
Alex is really gone.
361
00:14:02,930 --> 00:14:04,430
Oh, hey. Come on, man.
362
00:14:04,430 --> 00:14:05,430
You--
363
00:14:05,430 --> 00:14:06,930
You know, you were right.
364
00:14:06,930 --> 00:14:08,430
It wasn't meant to be,
it wasn't meant to be.
365
00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:09,930
Look, don't hand me
those platitudes,
366
00:14:09,930 --> 00:14:11,430
you sanctimonious bag of wind.
367
00:14:11,430 --> 00:14:13,440
My life is over!
368
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,440
( lively theme playing )
369
00:14:23,450 --> 00:14:25,450
Oh. I can't believe
Alex is gone.
370
00:14:26,450 --> 00:14:28,950
My God, Helen's
getting married.
371
00:14:28,950 --> 00:14:30,450
What am I gonna do?
372
00:14:30,450 --> 00:14:31,950
You? What about me?
373
00:14:31,950 --> 00:14:34,460
May I-- May I
say something?
374
00:14:34,460 --> 00:14:35,960
You two make me sick.
375
00:14:37,460 --> 00:14:38,460
( dramatically ):
"She's gone."
376
00:14:38,460 --> 00:14:39,960
"She's getting married."
377
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:43,470
Big-shot pilots moaning
about losing your girlfriends.
378
00:14:43,470 --> 00:14:45,970
You, with your--
Your cool leather jackets
379
00:14:45,970 --> 00:14:47,970
and your flyboy charms.
380
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:49,470
You walk into
any bar,
381
00:14:49,470 --> 00:14:50,470
they're crawling all over you.
382
00:14:50,470 --> 00:14:52,470
Here, I-- I-I got an idea.
383
00:14:52,470 --> 00:14:55,980
Try picking up a woman
after 15 hours
384
00:14:55,980 --> 00:14:58,480
in a hot, stuffy cab,
wearing--
385
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:00,980
Wearing sweat-stained,
out-of-date clothes
386
00:15:00,980 --> 00:15:03,490
and a coin changer
on your belt.
387
00:15:05,490 --> 00:15:07,490
( airplane flies overhead )
388
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,490
You know, I-- I never thought
about it before,
389
00:15:09,490 --> 00:15:10,490
but he's absolutely right.
390
00:15:10,490 --> 00:15:13,000
Yeah. His life is pathetic.
391
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:16,000
No. No, I mean about us.
What are we moaning about?
392
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,500
We're gonna be just fine without
Alex and Helen. You know why?
393
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:21,000
We're the Hackett brothers.
We got a lot going for us.
394
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,510
We do?
Hey.
395
00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:25,010
Who left a string of broken
hearts at Sconset High?
396
00:15:25,010 --> 00:15:26,510
Hackett brothers?
Yeah.
397
00:15:26,510 --> 00:15:29,010
And who had their choice of
any flight attendant in Boston?
398
00:15:29,010 --> 00:15:30,010
The Hackett brothers.
399
00:15:30,010 --> 00:15:31,010
Yeah, exactly.
400
00:15:31,010 --> 00:15:32,520
So why are we gonna be okay?
401
00:15:32,510 --> 00:15:34,520
'Cause we're
the Hackett brothers!
402
00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:35,520
You're damn right!
403
00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:37,520
From now on, we are
gonna have more women
404
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:39,020
than we ever dreamed of.
405
00:15:39,020 --> 00:15:40,020
Yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah.
406
00:15:40,020 --> 00:15:42,020
Hot Latin women
in tight black shorts--
407
00:15:42,020 --> 00:15:44,530
Sure, yeah. Big Nordic
blondes with no tan lines.
408
00:15:44,530 --> 00:15:47,530
Yeah. Nasty French girls
with pouty lips.
409
00:15:47,530 --> 00:15:49,030
Asian anchorwomen.
410
00:15:49,030 --> 00:15:51,030
Oh. Good one. Wow.
Hey.
411
00:15:51,030 --> 00:15:53,040
If we never have another
meaningful relationship
412
00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:54,540
for the rest of our lives,
it won't matter--
413
00:15:54,540 --> 00:15:56,540
We'll have each other.
Right, we'll have each other.
414
00:15:56,540 --> 00:15:58,540
There we'll be-- We'll be
two old men...
( chuckles )
415
00:15:58,540 --> 00:16:00,540
...with big smiles
and a lot of great memories.
416
00:16:00,540 --> 00:16:03,050
Oh, that's right.
Two fat, happy old guys
417
00:16:03,050 --> 00:16:05,050
sitting there in front of
the TV in our underwear,
418
00:16:05,050 --> 00:16:06,550
eating a couple of
Hungry-Man dinners.
419
00:16:06,550 --> 00:16:09,550
Yeah. Two unshaven
old geezers
420
00:16:09,550 --> 00:16:11,050
with 3-inch
fingernails
421
00:16:11,050 --> 00:16:13,060
shouting about who left
the cap off the VapoRub.
422
00:16:13,060 --> 00:16:14,560
( laughs ):
Yeah.
423
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:17,060
Mothers dragging their kids
away from our house saying,
424
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:20,060
"Don't go near there.
You know who lives in there?"
425
00:16:20,060 --> 00:16:22,570
Hackett brothers.
426
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:24,570
Where are those plane keys?
I'm going after Helen.
427
00:16:24,570 --> 00:16:26,570
No, no. No, you're not.
I need those keys to get Alex.
428
00:16:26,570 --> 00:16:29,070
No, Brian, look, she dumped you.
Have a little self-respect.
429
00:16:29,070 --> 00:16:31,570
What are you talking about? You
nailed another guy's fiancée,
430
00:16:31,570 --> 00:16:33,080
you slut.
Brian, you-- You--
431
00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:34,580
You don't even know
where she is.
432
00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:36,580
What are you gonna do?
Fly around the world
433
00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:39,080
with your head out the plane
window, yelling: "Alex"?
434
00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:42,080
Yeah. That
and drop leaflets. Huh?
435
00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:44,090
( both grunting )
436
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:45,090
Stop.
437
00:16:45,090 --> 00:16:47,090
( breathing
heavily )
438
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:49,090
Look, I really
want this, Brian.
439
00:16:50,090 --> 00:16:52,600
If you care about me...
440
00:16:52,590 --> 00:16:56,100
if you want me
to be happy...
441
00:16:56,100 --> 00:16:57,100
if you love me...
442
00:16:59,100 --> 00:17:01,600
you won't
stand in my way.
443
00:17:03,110 --> 00:17:04,610
Get bent.
No.
444
00:17:05,110 --> 00:17:06,110
Come on, come on.
445
00:17:06,110 --> 00:17:08,110
( grunts, chokes )
446
00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:10,110
Hi, guys.
447
00:17:10,110 --> 00:17:12,110
Hey, there's the keys
I've been looking for.
448
00:17:12,110 --> 00:17:14,120
No, I-- Let me have those!
I got to go get Alex!
449
00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:16,120
Come on. Give 'em to me.
I'm going after Helen.
450
00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:18,120
These keys?
Yeah. Give 'em to me.
451
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:20,120
Who wants the keys?
Give 'em to me.
452
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:22,630
Get the keys. Get the keys.
Come on!
453
00:17:22,620 --> 00:17:24,130
Hold it, hold it,
hold it.
454
00:17:24,130 --> 00:17:27,130
There's only one fair way
to settle this.
455
00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:29,130
Joe, Brian...
456
00:17:29,130 --> 00:17:30,630
what country,
457
00:17:30,630 --> 00:17:31,630
formerly known as Ceylon--?
458
00:17:31,630 --> 00:17:33,140
Give me those.
459
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:35,640
It's Sri Lanka, Joe!
460
00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:38,140
Crack a book sometime,
pretty boy!
461
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:40,640
( mellow theme playing )
462
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:58,660
JOE:
Helen, wait!
463
00:17:58,660 --> 00:17:59,660
Ow!
Oh.
464
00:17:59,660 --> 00:18:00,660
Ow! Ow!
465
00:18:00,660 --> 00:18:02,160
Joe...
466
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:03,170
What are you doing here?
467
00:18:03,170 --> 00:18:06,670
Can't...marry Lynch. Ow.
468
00:18:06,670 --> 00:18:08,170
What is wrong with you?
469
00:18:08,170 --> 00:18:10,170
Just ran...25 blocks.
470
00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:11,170
( breathing heavily )
471
00:18:11,170 --> 00:18:13,180
Cab accident.
472
00:18:13,180 --> 00:18:14,180
Not Achmed's fault.
473
00:18:14,180 --> 00:18:17,180
( elevator bell dings )
Come over here and sit down.
474
00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:18,680
Take the weight off
your knee.
Ah.
475
00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,680
Oh.
There you go.
Hope you're all right.
476
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:21,680
Ahh. Thanks.
477
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:23,690
Uh, hey, wait. Ow. Ow.
478
00:18:23,690 --> 00:18:25,190
Oh.
( grunts )
479
00:18:25,190 --> 00:18:26,690
Hey, aren't these things
supposed to open
480
00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:27,690
when you put your hand
in 'em?
481
00:18:27,690 --> 00:18:30,190
Not while I'm pushing
this button.
482
00:18:30,190 --> 00:18:31,690
Helen, you can't
marry Lynch.
483
00:18:31,690 --> 00:18:32,690
You're making
a big mistake.
484
00:18:32,690 --> 00:18:34,700
Would you get it
through your thick skull?
485
00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:36,200
I am marrying him, and
there's nothing you can say
486
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,200
to change that.
487
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:38,700
Marry me.
488
00:18:39,700 --> 00:18:40,700
Excuse me?
489
00:18:42,200 --> 00:18:43,210
Please.
490
00:18:49,710 --> 00:18:50,710
( breathing heavily )
491
00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:57,220
Did you just ask me
to marry you?
492
00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:59,720
Yes.
493
00:19:01,220 --> 00:19:02,730
( grunts )
494
00:19:02,720 --> 00:19:04,230
Take your time.
Think about it.
495
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:09,230
Boy, just when I have
my life all figured out,
496
00:19:09,230 --> 00:19:11,730
you come here and pull
this stupid stunt.
497
00:19:11,730 --> 00:19:14,240
Well, 31 years without
a single proposal,
498
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:16,240
then I get two
in one day.
499
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,740
Three, if you count
the guy out front
500
00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:20,240
playing "Lovely Bunch
of Coconuts" on his lips.
501
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:22,750
Helen, I-- I--
You know, I know
you don't want to hear this,
502
00:19:22,740 --> 00:19:24,250
but I'm marrying
Davis...
503
00:19:24,250 --> 00:19:25,750
and that's
that.
504
00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:26,750
( hits stop button )
505
00:19:26,750 --> 00:19:28,250
Oh.
Give me one good reason why.
506
00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:30,750
Oh, honey, I'll give you
the best reason of all.
507
00:19:30,750 --> 00:19:31,250
He...
508
00:19:33,260 --> 00:19:34,760
asked me first.
509
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:37,760
Oh. That's what the most
important decision of your life
510
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:39,760
boils down to? Firsties?
511
00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:41,760
Hey, wait
a minute.
512
00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:43,770
You left Nantucket
way before I did.
513
00:19:43,770 --> 00:19:44,770
You've been walking around
514
00:19:44,770 --> 00:19:46,770
thinking things over,
haven't you?
515
00:19:46,770 --> 00:19:47,770
Tsk. No.
516
00:19:47,770 --> 00:19:48,770
I...
517
00:19:49,270 --> 00:19:51,270
took in a show.
518
00:19:51,270 --> 00:19:52,780
Cats.
519
00:19:52,770 --> 00:19:54,780
You did not. Admit it.
You have doubts.
520
00:19:54,780 --> 00:19:55,780
Hey, I was at Cats.
521
00:19:55,780 --> 00:19:57,780
Oh-- Oh, yeah? What does
Rum Tum Tugger sing
522
00:19:57,780 --> 00:19:58,780
at the top of the second act?
523
00:19:59,780 --> 00:20:01,280
"Feelings."
524
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,290
Okay. So I walked around
the block a few times.
525
00:20:04,290 --> 00:20:06,290
Everyone has doubts
before they get married.
526
00:20:06,290 --> 00:20:08,790
But I know now that
I have made up my mind,
527
00:20:08,790 --> 00:20:09,790
and I'm sure about it.
528
00:20:09,790 --> 00:20:11,790
So, Joe, just-- Just go away.
529
00:20:11,790 --> 00:20:13,300
All right.
530
00:20:13,300 --> 00:20:14,800
Helen, if you can
look me in the eye
531
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:17,300
and honestly tell me
that you don't love me,
532
00:20:17,300 --> 00:20:18,300
I will get off
this elevator
533
00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:19,800
and out of
your life.
534
00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:22,300
I don't love you.
I got to stop saying that.
535
00:20:22,300 --> 00:20:24,310
Helen, you're lying,
and you know it.
536
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:26,310
Okay!
537
00:20:26,310 --> 00:20:27,810
Okay, I love you.
538
00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:29,310
I've always loved you.
539
00:20:31,810 --> 00:20:34,320
But what the hell kind of reason
is that to get married?
540
00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:35,320
Well...
541
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:36,820
it's no, "He
asked me first."
542
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:38,820
But it's the best
I can do.
543
00:20:39,820 --> 00:20:42,320
Joe, it's too late for us.
544
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:44,330
( pleadingly ):
Please.
545
00:20:44,330 --> 00:20:45,830
It's just not gonna work.
546
00:20:45,830 --> 00:20:46,830
Damn it, Helen.
547
00:20:46,830 --> 00:20:48,830
When you walked out
this morning, I--
548
00:20:48,830 --> 00:20:50,330
I felt all the life
drain out of me.
549
00:20:50,330 --> 00:20:52,330
I sat at that counter,
and all I could think about
550
00:20:52,330 --> 00:20:54,340
is all the years
we've known each other,
551
00:20:54,340 --> 00:20:55,340
since we were kids.
552
00:20:55,340 --> 00:20:57,340
We've already spent
a lifetime together.
553
00:20:57,340 --> 00:20:58,840
Nobody knows me
better than you.
554
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:01,340
And no one knows you
better than I do.
555
00:21:01,340 --> 00:21:03,350
How can you even think
about marrying Lynch?
556
00:21:03,350 --> 00:21:04,350
It's wrong.
557
00:21:05,350 --> 00:21:07,350
Having kids with him.
558
00:21:07,350 --> 00:21:08,850
Growing old together.
559
00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:10,350
That's our marriage.
560
00:21:11,850 --> 00:21:13,860
Those are our kids.
561
00:21:13,860 --> 00:21:15,860
It's our lifetime.
562
00:21:18,860 --> 00:21:21,860
We're supposed to
be together.
563
00:21:23,870 --> 00:21:25,370
I love you, Helen.
564
00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:29,870
Tsk.
565
00:21:29,870 --> 00:21:32,370
Well...guess, um...
566
00:21:34,380 --> 00:21:36,880
Sometimes love
just isn't enough, huh?
567
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,380
( hits start
button )
568
00:21:41,380 --> 00:21:42,890
Ask me again.
569
00:21:44,390 --> 00:21:45,390
What?
570
00:21:45,390 --> 00:21:47,390
Ask me again.
571
00:21:50,890 --> 00:21:52,390
Will you marry me?
572
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:55,900
Oh, what
the heck.
573
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:01,900
Mm.
Mm.
574
00:22:03,410 --> 00:22:04,910
You stopped for
a hot dog, didn't you?
575
00:22:04,910 --> 00:22:06,410
Tsk. Oh.
( chuckles )
576
00:22:14,420 --> 00:22:16,420
Can--? Can you
believe this, Bevo?
577
00:22:16,420 --> 00:22:17,920
I mean, all night we're
stitching and sewing,
578
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:19,420
and stitching and sewing.
579
00:22:19,420 --> 00:22:21,920
And all day they're breaking up
and getting back together,
580
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:23,430
breaking up and
getting back together.
581
00:22:23,430 --> 00:22:25,930
God. I tell you,
it's enough to make you
582
00:22:25,930 --> 00:22:27,930
give up needlepoint forever.
583
00:22:30,430 --> 00:22:31,930
There, I said it.
584
00:22:31,930 --> 00:22:34,440
Okay. All right,
let's have a look.
585
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:35,940
Let's see how this looks.
586
00:22:35,940 --> 00:22:36,940
All right, uh--
587
00:22:36,940 --> 00:22:38,440
Oh, move your thumb.
588
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,940
No, the other thumb.
589
00:22:40,940 --> 00:22:42,440
No, the other thumb.
41041
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