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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,681 --> 00:00:06,361 Why are children dancing with a mad Polish woman 2 00:00:06,521 --> 00:00:07,761 in my electoral office? 3 00:00:07,921 --> 00:00:10,361 When I agreed to this job, you said that I could bring lain to work. 4 00:00:10,521 --> 00:00:11,961 Senator Cleaver Greene. 5 00:00:12,121 --> 00:00:14,521 I was your fellow speaker here today. 6 00:00:14,681 --> 00:00:16,001 Li-Ming Wu. Hi. 7 00:00:16,161 --> 00:00:17,721 The bodies of two drowned plumbers 8 00:00:17,881 --> 00:00:19,881 were pulled from a sewer today in Canberra. 9 00:00:20,041 --> 00:00:21,721 The bodies were identified 10 00:00:21,881 --> 00:00:24,721 as brothers Jake and Gordon Metherell from Queanbeyan. 11 00:00:24,881 --> 00:00:26,321 - The plumbers. - Hm? 12 00:00:26,481 --> 00:00:27,921 You didn't. You wouldn't. 13 00:00:28,081 --> 00:00:29,441 Have you got an appointment to see me, Joe? 14 00:00:29,601 --> 00:00:32,561 What if I throw you my numbers, make you Prime Minister? 15 00:00:32,721 --> 00:00:34,401 You give me that back, 16 00:00:34,561 --> 00:00:36,041 you sign a legal document 17 00:00:36,201 --> 00:00:38,561 relinquishing all future claims to it. 18 00:00:38,721 --> 00:00:40,401 - Prime Minister, Cal. - It's my painting. 19 00:00:40,561 --> 00:00:42,241 - Prime Minister. - Mmm... 20 00:00:42,401 --> 00:00:44,921 Are you sure you can't find another hour or so? 21 00:00:45,081 --> 00:00:48,481 It is not often I spend time with someone who appreciates my passions. 22 00:00:48,641 --> 00:00:50,441 Why are people leaving the room quickly? 23 00:00:52,161 --> 00:00:53,241 Oh, shit. 24 00:00:53,401 --> 00:00:55,161 - It's a coup. - Fuck me sideways. 25 00:00:55,321 --> 00:00:56,721 - It's a fucking coup. - Oh... 26 00:02:06,521 --> 00:02:08,281 Excuse me. 27 00:02:11,481 --> 00:02:13,161 You look incredible. 28 00:02:13,321 --> 00:02:15,961 Why was I not invited? 29 00:02:16,121 --> 00:02:19,001 Because questions would be asked 30 00:02:19,161 --> 00:02:21,761 by my parents and my husband's parents, 31 00:02:21,921 --> 00:02:25,121 the politburo, the ambassador, not to mention my husband. 32 00:02:25,281 --> 00:02:28,601 Yes, yes. Well, let's... Let's not mention him. 33 00:02:28,761 --> 00:02:30,881 Now, who is the offending article? 34 00:02:31,041 --> 00:02:34,521 Stop it! He is the deputy secretary for the embassy here. 35 00:02:34,681 --> 00:02:36,321 - Oh, is he? - Yes. 36 00:02:36,481 --> 00:02:37,881 Oh, right. Well, good for him. 37 00:02:38,041 --> 00:02:40,121 His father is about the third richest man in China. 38 00:02:40,281 --> 00:02:41,201 Oh, is he? 39 00:02:41,361 --> 00:02:43,281 And he wants his son to be president one day. 40 00:02:43,441 --> 00:02:45,401 Does he? And, um... 41 00:02:45,561 --> 00:02:48,281 Do you love him? 42 00:02:48,441 --> 00:02:49,801 I like him. 43 00:02:50,801 --> 00:02:53,641 He's handsome, he's smart. 44 00:02:53,801 --> 00:02:55,881 With my advice, he could get things done. 45 00:02:56,041 --> 00:02:57,721 See, I don't like him. 46 00:02:57,881 --> 00:03:00,321 - You never met him. - No, but I don't... 47 00:03:00,481 --> 00:03:03,721 I don't have to meet people to not like them, I just... 48 00:03:03,881 --> 00:03:05,881 So, this is the real you, 49 00:03:06,041 --> 00:03:08,961 as opposed to the bullshit artist I had lunch with. 50 00:03:10,281 --> 00:03:12,561 Yes. This is... 51 00:03:12,721 --> 00:03:15,721 This is it, I'm afraid. 52 00:03:15,881 --> 00:03:19,001 I always prefer the genuine article. 53 00:03:50,841 --> 00:03:53,601 Er, happy to talk about this, guys. 54 00:03:55,761 --> 00:03:58,041 Sources within Australia's diplomatic corps 55 00:03:58,201 --> 00:03:59,361 are describing it as 56 00:03:59,521 --> 00:04:03,241 one of the most embarrassing diplomatic incidents in decades. 57 00:04:03,401 --> 00:04:05,561 The Chinese Premier is not only calling for an apology... 58 00:04:05,721 --> 00:04:07,201 Pull up at this vet. 59 00:04:07,361 --> 00:04:08,961 Princess is distressed. 60 00:04:09,121 --> 00:04:12,921 I need to see if there's someone who could have a look at her. 61 00:04:22,401 --> 00:04:23,921 Oh, God! 62 00:04:24,081 --> 00:04:27,161 Whoa... Oh, God! 63 00:04:28,161 --> 00:04:29,961 - Oh... - Yes, they can see her. 64 00:04:30,121 --> 00:04:32,081 Oh, mate, she's chucked something up in there. 65 00:04:32,241 --> 00:04:33,441 - What? - Oh, mate. 66 00:04:33,601 --> 00:04:36,601 She has thrown something up in there that you don't want to know about. 67 00:04:36,761 --> 00:04:38,441 Oh, Princess. 68 00:04:40,041 --> 00:04:42,321 Where...where is she? 69 00:04:42,481 --> 00:04:44,041 What do you mean? 70 00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,281 - Where's Princess? - I don't know. 71 00:04:48,201 --> 00:04:49,881 Where is she? Well... 72 00:04:50,041 --> 00:04:51,641 Well... Well, she... 73 00:04:51,801 --> 00:04:53,481 She was right here a second ago. 74 00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:56,441 - I'm buggered if I know. - You...you were right here. 75 00:04:56,601 --> 00:04:58,201 Well, mate, I don't know. I mean has she...she... 76 00:04:58,361 --> 00:04:59,601 Princess... 77 00:04:59,761 --> 00:05:01,161 Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty. 78 00:05:01,321 --> 00:05:02,321 Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty! 79 00:05:02,481 --> 00:05:04,161 Kitty, kitty, kitty. 80 00:05:04,321 --> 00:05:07,121 Oh, no. I don't know. Catty! 81 00:05:07,281 --> 00:05:09,361 This morning, I had the privilege 82 00:05:09,521 --> 00:05:12,521 to inform His Excellency the Governor-General 83 00:05:12,681 --> 00:05:16,361 that the Federal Liberal Party last night bestowed upon me 84 00:05:16,521 --> 00:05:19,561 the enormous honour of its leadership. 85 00:05:19,721 --> 00:05:23,041 He consequently asked me to form a government. 86 00:05:24,321 --> 00:05:26,001 I would like to thank Gareth Morrow 87 00:05:26,161 --> 00:05:28,281 for his fantastic work as Prime Minister 88 00:05:28,441 --> 00:05:31,641 over the past five Newspolls... uh, 15 weeks. 89 00:05:32,761 --> 00:05:35,961 But quite frankly, we weren't coming up to scratch. 90 00:05:36,121 --> 00:05:37,801 Darling. 91 00:05:37,961 --> 00:05:39,161 Come here. 92 00:05:39,321 --> 00:05:43,961 More significantly, though, and on a very, er, very sad note, 93 00:05:44,121 --> 00:05:47,161 Chief Justice Nelson last night passed away suddenly 94 00:05:47,321 --> 00:05:48,241 from a heart attack. 95 00:05:48,401 --> 00:05:52,601 He graced his office with grace and dignity 96 00:05:52,761 --> 00:05:55,921 and we send our condolences and love to His Honour's family 97 00:05:56,081 --> 00:05:58,761 and, of course, there will be a state funeral. 98 00:05:58,921 --> 00:06:02,041 - Are there any questions? - Mr McGregor... 99 00:06:02,201 --> 00:06:04,121 - Yes? 100 00:06:04,281 --> 00:06:06,841 I understand the incident at the Midwinter Ball last night 101 00:06:07,001 --> 00:06:10,321 involving Senator Cleaver Greene, a Chinese bride, 102 00:06:10,481 --> 00:06:11,881 and the collapse of a screen 103 00:06:12,041 --> 00:06:13,841 has caused enormous tensions with Beijing. 104 00:06:14,001 --> 00:06:15,881 Mm. Not at all, Catherine, no. 105 00:06:16,041 --> 00:06:19,761 I spoke to Premier Tsing this morning and we couldn't be closer. 106 00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:23,481 Relations simply could not be better. 107 00:06:26,841 --> 00:06:28,161 God... 108 00:06:30,241 --> 00:06:32,601 So what made you come home so suddenly? 109 00:06:34,121 --> 00:06:35,601 Claudia left me. 110 00:06:36,921 --> 00:06:39,201 - Claudia's a colleague? - My boss. 111 00:06:40,401 --> 00:06:41,241 OK. 112 00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:43,601 And... And she's about how... 113 00:06:43,761 --> 00:06:45,841 - 54. - Right, 54. 114 00:06:46,961 --> 00:06:48,881 Darling, can I ask you a, um... 115 00:06:49,041 --> 00:06:51,201 ..a bit of an awkward question? 116 00:06:52,801 --> 00:06:53,801 Yeah. 117 00:06:53,961 --> 00:06:55,961 This thing that you've clearly got about older women, 118 00:06:56,121 --> 00:06:59,161 and it is a thing because it's been going on for a while now... 119 00:06:59,321 --> 00:07:00,281 Mm-hm. 120 00:07:00,441 --> 00:07:02,801 ..do you think that, um...you know, subconsciously, 121 00:07:02,961 --> 00:07:05,361 it's a way of, um... 122 00:07:05,521 --> 00:07:07,561 ..sort of... 123 00:07:07,721 --> 00:07:09,721 ..that it's about you and me? 124 00:07:09,881 --> 00:07:11,161 Eugh! 125 00:07:11,321 --> 00:07:13,481 Are you out of... Are you kidding me? 126 00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:17,241 How many times do I have tell you, Mum, this is not oedipal? 127 00:07:17,401 --> 00:07:18,961 This is just a thing. 128 00:07:19,121 --> 00:07:21,121 - It's a normal thing. - OK. 129 00:07:21,281 --> 00:07:23,401 See, I think that a more normal thing would be 130 00:07:23,561 --> 00:07:26,561 to have lustful thoughts about girls your own age, for example, you know? 131 00:07:26,721 --> 00:07:28,001 What is there to understand? 132 00:07:28,161 --> 00:07:30,681 Most people, they have things, and most people don't know why. 133 00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:32,241 But darling, she's 54. 134 00:07:32,401 --> 00:07:33,481 I mean that's, you know... 135 00:07:33,641 --> 00:07:35,881 Are you saying that a 54-year-old woman can't be beautiful? 136 00:07:36,041 --> 00:07:37,201 No, that's not what I'm saying. 137 00:07:37,361 --> 00:07:38,441 It's just around the corner for you. 138 00:07:38,601 --> 00:07:40,521 Well, hey, it's not around the corner, I'll have you know. 139 00:07:40,681 --> 00:07:41,961 It's a good way off. 140 00:07:42,121 --> 00:07:43,601 And, you know, Missy is a beautiful woman 141 00:07:43,761 --> 00:07:47,321 and you have a child together, and she's got a good decade on you. 142 00:07:47,481 --> 00:07:48,681 And, I mean, that's substantial, 143 00:07:48,841 --> 00:07:50,961 that's something to be getting on with, don't you think? 144 00:07:53,961 --> 00:07:56,401 - Can I help you? - Dallas Jeffrey, Senator Greene. 145 00:07:56,561 --> 00:07:59,561 I'm from Morgan Field Estate Agents, who represent this property. 146 00:07:59,721 --> 00:08:02,361 This is your notice to quit. 147 00:08:02,521 --> 00:08:05,401 - Quit what? - These premises. Immediately. 148 00:08:05,561 --> 00:08:07,881 Well, you can't do this. 149 00:08:08,041 --> 00:08:09,481 I'm a...I'm...I'm... 150 00:08:09,641 --> 00:08:11,721 - I'm a Senator. - We're very well aware of that. 151 00:08:11,881 --> 00:08:13,161 Well, I have a lease. 152 00:08:13,321 --> 00:08:14,961 Many of the terms of which you have broken. 153 00:08:15,121 --> 00:08:17,121 Here's the thing - I'm glad you're here 154 00:08:17,281 --> 00:08:19,241 because I've been having a lot of issues 155 00:08:19,401 --> 00:08:20,641 with the plumbing in this joint, 156 00:08:20,801 --> 00:08:22,561 things you don't want to know about, 157 00:08:22,721 --> 00:08:24,601 that I've had to pay for out of my own pocket, 158 00:08:24,761 --> 00:08:26,601 and I need to be compensated for that. 159 00:08:26,761 --> 00:08:29,241 You have constantly been in arrears with your rental payments. 160 00:08:29,401 --> 00:08:32,361 Yes, now, see, that's an issue I'm having with the banking industry 161 00:08:32,521 --> 00:08:34,241 because there's a conspiracy going on. 162 00:08:34,401 --> 00:08:35,441 Senator Greene, I... 163 00:08:35,601 --> 00:08:38,761 You can't just kick me out of here without any notice. 164 00:08:38,921 --> 00:08:40,801 I...I know the law. 165 00:08:40,961 --> 00:08:42,601 I make the law. 166 00:08:42,761 --> 00:08:45,441 There is a clause in your rental agreement 167 00:08:45,601 --> 00:08:48,921 which specifically prohibits subletting your space, 168 00:08:49,081 --> 00:08:51,881 and allows for instant termination of the lease if you do. 169 00:08:52,041 --> 00:08:53,041 I've never... 170 00:08:53,201 --> 00:08:54,521 You have an hour to vacate these premises. 171 00:08:54,681 --> 00:08:58,361 These gentlemen will ensure your rapid departure. 172 00:09:00,001 --> 00:09:01,761 We'll probably need to fumigate. 173 00:09:01,921 --> 00:09:03,641 Is it all done? Locked up at the back? 174 00:09:03,801 --> 00:09:05,761 Alright, send the cleaners in now, please. 175 00:09:05,921 --> 00:09:09,801 Oh, the new Prime Minister is so keen for a meeting. 176 00:09:09,961 --> 00:09:11,921 Last night's events... 177 00:09:13,041 --> 00:09:15,681 Oh, great. That'd be right. Here we go. 178 00:09:16,921 --> 00:09:18,201 - Yes, mate. - Hey! 179 00:09:18,361 --> 00:09:21,521 Listen would you mind just taking them to Wendy's, please? 180 00:09:21,681 --> 00:09:24,161 I'm assuming this'll be my lift for the day. 181 00:09:26,201 --> 00:09:29,321 Hello, Nicole. Would you mind meeting me at the house, please, 182 00:09:29,481 --> 00:09:30,721 as soon as possible? 183 00:09:30,881 --> 00:09:32,041 Thank you. 184 00:09:32,201 --> 00:09:34,201 - Come! 185 00:09:38,121 --> 00:09:39,881 I'm a man of my word... 186 00:09:41,961 --> 00:09:43,481 ..Treasurer. 187 00:09:44,641 --> 00:09:47,601 Well, I won't say thank you 188 00:09:47,761 --> 00:09:51,281 but I am prepared to acknowledge the gesture. 189 00:09:52,921 --> 00:09:55,121 - Fair enough. 190 00:09:55,281 --> 00:09:56,961 Uh, Joe, hang on a tick. 191 00:09:57,121 --> 00:09:58,601 Greene's coming in. 192 00:09:58,761 --> 00:10:01,081 Might be better if we double-team him. 193 00:10:02,241 --> 00:10:04,041 Brother. 194 00:10:05,601 --> 00:10:07,481 Rightio... 195 00:10:10,321 --> 00:10:11,641 ..brother. 196 00:10:14,321 --> 00:10:16,841 - Thank you. 197 00:10:26,561 --> 00:10:28,521 I...I didn't know you were coming back. 198 00:10:28,681 --> 00:10:30,761 It was a spur of the moment decision. 199 00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:34,481 - Ow! - Spur is not a fucking excuse! 200 00:10:34,641 --> 00:10:36,881 You might want to hide behind being a child, 201 00:10:37,041 --> 00:10:38,601 but you're not a child anymore! 202 00:10:38,761 --> 00:10:39,681 Ow! 203 00:10:39,841 --> 00:10:42,121 OK, one was fair, alright? 204 00:10:42,281 --> 00:10:44,441 Do not get me started on fair. 205 00:10:44,601 --> 00:10:46,001 You are an adult. 206 00:10:46,161 --> 00:10:47,841 You have responsibilities. 207 00:10:48,001 --> 00:10:51,281 Do you have any idea how selfish you've been? 208 00:10:51,441 --> 00:10:54,601 Is there an answer I can give that won't result in me getting a slap? 209 00:10:58,121 --> 00:10:59,681 Is Claudia here? 210 00:10:59,841 --> 00:11:01,241 Is that why you've come back? 211 00:11:01,401 --> 00:11:03,481 Claudia and I have broken up. 212 00:11:07,801 --> 00:11:10,241 God. She's so grown-up. 213 00:11:10,401 --> 00:11:12,841 Yeah, it's what happens, isn't it? 214 00:11:14,081 --> 00:11:15,961 Hey, little darlin' baby girl. 215 00:11:16,121 --> 00:11:17,241 Hi. 216 00:11:17,401 --> 00:11:19,041 Oh. 217 00:11:20,641 --> 00:11:22,321 Good girl. 218 00:11:22,481 --> 00:11:24,201 There were no deaths, 219 00:11:24,361 --> 00:11:27,201 but there was quite a bit of physical damage, and political. 220 00:11:27,361 --> 00:11:29,841 So, I mean, it has to be attempted manslaughter at least. 221 00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:31,401 What, a screen falling over? 222 00:11:31,561 --> 00:11:33,321 Jesus, you're a shit lawyer, Cal. 223 00:11:33,481 --> 00:11:36,841 There's no such thing as attempted manslaughter, mate. 224 00:11:37,001 --> 00:11:40,561 By definition, you can't attempt the accidental death of someone. 225 00:11:40,721 --> 00:11:43,521 Terry, I need to give the Chinese something. 226 00:11:43,681 --> 00:11:45,561 Or to be more precise, someone. 227 00:11:45,721 --> 00:11:46,921 There's attempted assault. 228 00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:49,681 What, by leaning on a screen? Which nobody saw me do, by the way. 229 00:11:49,841 --> 00:11:52,641 And which resulted in a couple of people getting bruised. 230 00:11:52,801 --> 00:11:54,241 - You pushed over the screen... - I leaned. 231 00:11:54,401 --> 00:11:56,321 ..with the intention of causing grievous bodily harm 232 00:11:56,481 --> 00:11:57,921 on a race of people that you hate. 233 00:11:58,081 --> 00:12:00,241 Oh, the whole race? With one screen? 234 00:12:00,401 --> 00:12:02,201 Your father served in Korea, didn't he? 235 00:12:02,361 --> 00:12:03,801 - Yes. And? - There you go. 236 00:12:03,961 --> 00:12:05,841 What do you mean, "There you go"? 237 00:12:06,001 --> 00:12:10,241 Let's go with the whole hate/terrorism line. 238 00:12:10,401 --> 00:12:12,641 That way, we can have a trial in Canberra, 239 00:12:12,801 --> 00:12:14,321 no press, no public. 240 00:12:14,481 --> 00:12:16,241 We can have him off to an island by Thursday. 241 00:12:16,401 --> 00:12:18,321 Terrorism is clean, uncontroversial. 242 00:12:18,481 --> 00:12:19,721 And chuck in the hate crime... 243 00:12:19,881 --> 00:12:22,001 Oh. You people... You're...you're mental. 244 00:12:22,161 --> 00:12:25,481 You have deliberately destroyed years of patient diplomacy. 245 00:12:25,641 --> 00:12:26,521 Whose diplomacy? 246 00:12:26,681 --> 00:12:28,841 You've been Prime Minister for about seven seconds, mate. 247 00:12:29,001 --> 00:12:31,121 I mean the South China Sea is about to erupt. 248 00:12:31,281 --> 00:12:33,201 I mean you have no idea the shit I had to eat 249 00:12:33,361 --> 00:12:34,801 from the Chinese this morning. 250 00:12:34,961 --> 00:12:37,601 You know, if I close my eyes, Cal, 251 00:12:37,761 --> 00:12:40,841 it's almost as if you're channelling my sister. 252 00:12:41,001 --> 00:12:45,921 I mean, your voice is a couple of octaves higher, but it's uncanny. 253 00:12:47,841 --> 00:12:49,041 So? 254 00:12:49,201 --> 00:12:52,161 Oh, they're talking terrorism charges. 255 00:12:52,321 --> 00:12:54,201 - What?! - Hilarious. Yeah. 256 00:12:54,361 --> 00:12:56,481 I mean, they're gonna try and ping me with whatever they can get. 257 00:12:56,641 --> 00:12:58,201 But it's pretty funny. I'm actually quite... 258 00:12:58,361 --> 00:12:59,601 - I know. 259 00:12:59,761 --> 00:13:02,001 I'm looking forward to it - it'll be a big day with the press obviously. 260 00:13:02,161 --> 00:13:03,121 - Terrorism? - Terrorism. 261 00:13:03,281 --> 00:13:06,201 I mean, I leant against a screen - or is it leaned? 262 00:13:06,361 --> 00:13:08,081 Um... Well, leaned or leant? 263 00:13:08,241 --> 00:13:11,121 That is the deputy secretary of the Chinese Embassy 264 00:13:11,281 --> 00:13:12,721 waiting outside your office. 265 00:13:12,881 --> 00:13:13,801 The whatty...what? 266 00:13:13,961 --> 00:13:15,121 Why? Well, has he got an appointment? 267 00:13:15,281 --> 00:13:17,241 No, but I'm thinking that he doesn't need one. 268 00:13:17,401 --> 00:13:18,481 Well, why do I want to see him? 269 00:13:18,641 --> 00:13:20,681 Because he's here and he was the groom. 270 00:13:22,041 --> 00:13:24,081 Oh, my God. He's the groom. 271 00:13:24,241 --> 00:13:25,561 - Oh, shitballs. - Yep. 272 00:13:25,721 --> 00:13:28,721 Oh, wow, he looks fit. 273 00:13:28,881 --> 00:13:30,881 Yeah. Pretty, pretty fit. 274 00:13:31,041 --> 00:13:34,121 Like, I'm talking Jet Li. 275 00:13:34,281 --> 00:13:35,801 You mean Bruce Lee. 276 00:13:35,961 --> 00:13:37,161 No, I mean Jet Li. 277 00:13:37,321 --> 00:13:40,681 Who's Jet Li? Oh, you're thinking of Jason Scott Lee, Bruce's son. 278 00:13:40,841 --> 00:13:42,561 No, Bruce's son was Brandon Lee. 279 00:13:42,721 --> 00:13:44,841 I don't care if it's Jennifer Jason... 280 00:13:45,001 --> 00:13:46,161 Just shush, shush. 281 00:13:46,321 --> 00:13:48,081 Let me focus here. 282 00:13:48,241 --> 00:13:51,001 Listen, could you just get some sort of emergency medical services 283 00:13:51,161 --> 00:13:52,881 on standby, please? 284 00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,961 OK, I'll call the Coroner. 285 00:13:56,921 --> 00:13:59,401 Ah, Deputy Secretary, a pleasure to meet you. 286 00:13:59,561 --> 00:14:01,721 Senator Greene, how do you do? 287 00:14:05,561 --> 00:14:07,881 It has been a pleasure. 288 00:14:12,921 --> 00:14:14,401 - He seemed nice. - Yeah. 289 00:14:14,561 --> 00:14:17,721 I mean, that went a lot better than I thought it would. 290 00:14:17,881 --> 00:14:19,321 Just keep your head back. 291 00:14:19,481 --> 00:14:22,121 Ah. That's nice. 292 00:14:22,281 --> 00:14:23,601 Mm. 293 00:14:23,761 --> 00:14:25,121 Ohh... 294 00:14:27,881 --> 00:14:30,041 I know this is unfortunate timing 295 00:14:30,201 --> 00:14:33,961 but my people have told me that you should make your reckoning now. 296 00:14:34,121 --> 00:14:36,201 Make my reckoning? What? 297 00:14:36,361 --> 00:14:37,841 Settle your account. 298 00:14:38,001 --> 00:14:42,881 There is not much confidence amongst any of the drivers' factions 299 00:14:43,041 --> 00:14:44,961 that you will be a senator much longer. 300 00:14:45,121 --> 00:14:47,521 I am under considerable political pressure right now... 301 00:14:47,681 --> 00:14:48,841 Oh, yes, right. 302 00:14:49,001 --> 00:14:50,721 ..and in order to maintain my position, 303 00:14:50,881 --> 00:14:52,561 I have to be seen to be showing strength. 304 00:14:52,721 --> 00:14:55,601 And what position do you think I'm in to settle any account, mate? 305 00:14:55,761 --> 00:14:57,721 I'm a homeless person with a broken nose. 306 00:14:57,881 --> 00:15:00,561 This is about the Princess, and don't pretend otherwise. 307 00:15:00,721 --> 00:15:03,121 I'll get you a new cat. Put it on the tab. 308 00:15:03,281 --> 00:15:04,561 Half the money, now. 309 00:15:04,721 --> 00:15:05,841 I don't have half the... 310 00:15:06,001 --> 00:15:08,761 I mean, I don't know how much the whole amount is, mate, 311 00:15:08,921 --> 00:15:10,921 but I can tell you now I don't have half of it. 312 00:15:11,081 --> 00:15:12,801 Half the money, or half a finger? 313 00:15:12,961 --> 00:15:14,121 Half a finger? 314 00:15:14,281 --> 00:15:16,121 What, are you fuckin' Tony Soprano now? 315 00:15:19,601 --> 00:15:20,601 Jesus... 316 00:15:20,761 --> 00:15:22,881 My colleagues are very serious people. 317 00:15:23,041 --> 00:15:24,321 Half a finger? 318 00:15:24,481 --> 00:15:27,041 Mate, I've been driving you and that anally bereft cat of yours 319 00:15:27,201 --> 00:15:28,281 around for weeks now. 320 00:15:28,441 --> 00:15:29,601 That's gotta be worth something. 321 00:15:29,761 --> 00:15:31,361 - OK, you get 5% off for driving. - Christ! 322 00:15:31,521 --> 00:15:35,081 - How much do you think I owe you? - Let me check. Pass me that ledger. 323 00:15:37,321 --> 00:15:38,441 Yep. 324 00:15:43,641 --> 00:15:45,601 $180,000. 325 00:15:45,761 --> 00:15:48,881 - Rounded down. - 180,000? 326 00:15:49,041 --> 00:15:50,161 That is impossible, mate. 327 00:15:50,321 --> 00:15:52,081 With interest, very possible. 328 00:15:52,241 --> 00:15:53,161 That is bullshit! 329 00:15:53,321 --> 00:15:55,521 I can't even conceptualise 180 grand, mate. 330 00:15:55,681 --> 00:15:57,601 - Look, it's not just me. - Holy shit! 331 00:15:57,761 --> 00:15:59,321 These are very serious people. 332 00:15:59,481 --> 00:16:01,001 Who, the drivers? 333 00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:03,361 If I don't go back with half the money or half a finger, 334 00:16:03,521 --> 00:16:06,201 I will lose their respect and perhaps a whole finger myself. 335 00:16:06,361 --> 00:16:07,201 Oh... 336 00:16:07,361 --> 00:16:09,121 And I don't think that's fair, under the circumstances. 337 00:16:09,281 --> 00:16:11,881 OK. Well, let's just go down to an ATM and withdraw $90,000! 338 00:16:12,041 --> 00:16:13,681 I... Alright, I tell you what. 339 00:16:13,841 --> 00:16:15,041 I will... 340 00:16:15,201 --> 00:16:16,521 I'll write you a cheque. 341 00:16:20,201 --> 00:16:24,041 You can be so amusing sometimes, sir. 342 00:16:24,201 --> 00:16:27,441 Your son has made a lot of money, has he not? 343 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:30,761 I don't know. Why are we talking about my son now? 344 00:16:30,921 --> 00:16:33,681 - You do know he's back in Australia? - No, he's not. Since when? 345 00:16:33,841 --> 00:16:35,121 Since this morning. 346 00:16:35,281 --> 00:16:36,521 He would've called. 347 00:16:36,681 --> 00:16:38,601 Well... How do you know these things? 348 00:16:38,761 --> 00:16:40,441 Good God, man. 349 00:16:40,601 --> 00:16:44,401 You still do not understand the mysteries of power. 350 00:16:44,561 --> 00:16:47,401 True power is never seen. 351 00:16:47,561 --> 00:16:49,521 We are drivers. 352 00:16:49,681 --> 00:16:53,361 We are this country's connective tissue. 353 00:16:53,521 --> 00:16:56,681 And I want my Princess back. 354 00:17:22,841 --> 00:17:24,241 Hey, mate. 355 00:17:24,401 --> 00:17:26,281 Why didn't you tell me you were back? 356 00:17:26,441 --> 00:17:28,401 It's a long story, Cleave. 357 00:17:28,561 --> 00:17:29,841 - Mate. - It's a real cracker. 358 00:17:30,001 --> 00:17:31,561 It's one for the whole family. 359 00:17:31,721 --> 00:17:33,081 Oh, mate. 360 00:17:34,241 --> 00:17:35,521 What are you doing? 361 00:17:36,721 --> 00:17:38,041 Why is he wearing your robe? 362 00:17:38,201 --> 00:17:39,521 Well, er...the ball was boring, 363 00:17:39,681 --> 00:17:42,161 there was all that screaming coming from the Chinese wedding next door. 364 00:17:42,321 --> 00:17:44,121 - And I invited him back for a drink. - Are you kidding me? 365 00:17:44,281 --> 00:17:46,961 Oh, my God! Are you kidding? 366 00:17:47,121 --> 00:17:50,041 Oh, God. Ohhhh! God! 367 00:17:50,201 --> 00:17:52,401 Are you kidding me? 368 00:17:52,561 --> 00:17:53,961 Oh. 369 00:17:54,121 --> 00:17:55,321 You right in there, Cleave? 370 00:17:55,481 --> 00:17:59,641 You have not got an original idea in your head! 371 00:17:59,801 --> 00:18:00,921 Or your penis! 372 00:18:01,081 --> 00:18:02,441 Don't you see what's going on? 373 00:18:02,601 --> 00:18:05,201 He has been stalking me, sexually. 374 00:18:05,361 --> 00:18:08,241 - He has not been... - For years! Years! 375 00:18:08,401 --> 00:18:10,681 The whole world doesn't revolve around your penis! 376 00:18:14,281 --> 00:18:17,201 Oh, oh, what's Cleaver up to now? Oh... 377 00:18:17,361 --> 00:18:19,601 You're a sick man. I'm gonna throw up. 378 00:18:19,761 --> 00:18:21,321 - You are sick! - You know what, you're right. 379 00:18:21,481 --> 00:18:23,441 You're right, Cleaver. I was screwed. 380 00:18:23,601 --> 00:18:25,561 But Wendy has helped me see the light. 381 00:18:25,721 --> 00:18:26,721 Oh. 382 00:18:26,881 --> 00:18:29,241 You know, I was like a...like a crab lugging around his shell 383 00:18:29,401 --> 00:18:32,201 as opposed to a shell lugging around his crabs. 384 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,681 Oh, see, that's not fun... You think that's funny. 385 00:18:34,841 --> 00:18:36,041 But you know what? I have outgrown... 386 00:18:36,201 --> 00:18:37,401 - He thinks that's funny. - ..my tiny shell. 387 00:18:37,561 --> 00:18:39,681 I now have a new, big roomy one, 388 00:18:39,841 --> 00:18:43,001 with a jacuzzi and a '70s soundtrack. 389 00:18:43,161 --> 00:18:45,281 Look at him. That's my shell! 390 00:18:45,441 --> 00:18:47,041 - Oh, God... - That is my shell. 391 00:18:47,201 --> 00:18:49,321 You gave him my shell. 392 00:18:49,481 --> 00:18:51,041 - I didn't give him... - You did! 393 00:18:51,201 --> 00:18:52,641 Stop talking about shells. 394 00:18:52,801 --> 00:18:55,841 Because you couldn't have me and so you...you were determined to... 395 00:18:56,001 --> 00:18:58,081 ..to build someone in my likeness. 396 00:18:58,241 --> 00:19:00,561 - Cleaver, I rejected you, remember? - Yes. 397 00:19:00,721 --> 00:19:01,881 Yes, you rejected me 398 00:19:02,041 --> 00:19:04,281 because you wanted to go lounging around in Sardinia, 399 00:19:04,441 --> 00:19:07,001 and I wanted to stay here and serve the people. 400 00:19:07,161 --> 00:19:09,081 I rejected you because I can't actually trust 401 00:19:09,241 --> 00:19:11,041 a single word that comes out of your mouth. 402 00:19:11,201 --> 00:19:14,161 And the idea of you serving the people is ridiculous. 403 00:19:14,321 --> 00:19:16,681 Did you two... I need to know. Did you? 404 00:19:16,841 --> 00:19:17,841 Did you? 405 00:19:18,961 --> 00:19:20,801 That is absolutely none of your business. 406 00:19:23,401 --> 00:19:24,721 Did it? 407 00:19:27,841 --> 00:19:30,241 Oh, that fucking song again. 408 00:19:30,401 --> 00:19:32,961 World travel hasn't made you any more familiar 409 00:19:33,121 --> 00:19:35,121 with the notion of knocking, I see. 410 00:19:35,281 --> 00:19:37,881 Oh, my God, that song is going to drive someone postal one day. 411 00:19:38,041 --> 00:19:41,321 Your mother's obviously been putting up with it for a year now. 412 00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:46,321 However, number one on my Freudian hit parade right now 413 00:19:46,481 --> 00:19:49,401 is what the hell is going on with you, my friend? 414 00:19:49,561 --> 00:19:51,401 Claudia dumped me. 415 00:19:51,561 --> 00:19:54,761 And Claudia would be the... 416 00:19:54,921 --> 00:19:59,081 ..the octogenarian woman who lured you into her honey trap? 417 00:19:59,241 --> 00:20:00,401 Fuck, Dad. 418 00:20:00,561 --> 00:20:04,081 Don't joke about this or I swear to fuck I will get on a plane 419 00:20:04,241 --> 00:20:06,601 because I came here for comfort and support. 420 00:20:06,761 --> 00:20:09,881 Right. Yes, see, sometimes we think we need comfort and support, 421 00:20:10,041 --> 00:20:15,081 but actually what we really need is a size 9.5 Blunny up the clacker. 422 00:20:15,241 --> 00:20:18,641 Why should men get to be with women half their age, 423 00:20:18,801 --> 00:20:20,801 and women aren't allowed to do the same thing? 424 00:20:20,961 --> 00:20:24,201 I mean, the President of France has a wife 25 years older than him. 425 00:20:24,361 --> 00:20:25,841 Is he copping shit? 426 00:20:26,001 --> 00:20:28,321 Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't believe the President of France 427 00:20:28,481 --> 00:20:32,321 has fathered a child with his own father's former prostitute. 428 00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:34,321 Not that that'd be a problem in France, of course. 429 00:20:34,481 --> 00:20:38,401 Just... Just help me out with one thing, mate. 430 00:20:39,841 --> 00:20:42,081 What in the name of God 431 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,561 could possibly be wrong with Missy? 432 00:20:44,721 --> 00:20:49,001 I mean, she's an incredible woman, she's...she's older than you. 433 00:20:49,161 --> 00:20:52,121 If it's not working, it's not working. 434 00:20:52,281 --> 00:20:54,601 I fell for Claudia the moment I met her. 435 00:20:54,761 --> 00:20:55,841 No, you didn't. You didn't. 436 00:20:56,001 --> 00:20:57,401 No, you didn't. 437 00:20:57,561 --> 00:20:59,401 You see, this is... Argh! 438 00:20:59,561 --> 00:21:02,521 You've inherited your father's disease, mate. 439 00:21:02,681 --> 00:21:05,201 You're mistaking possibility for love. 440 00:21:05,361 --> 00:21:06,921 I don't know what that means. 441 00:21:07,081 --> 00:21:10,721 The only thing that ever falls in love at first sight is your penis. 442 00:21:11,841 --> 00:21:18,121 Real love presents itself slowly, over time. 443 00:21:18,281 --> 00:21:20,081 And sometimes... 444 00:21:20,241 --> 00:21:23,561 ..you only realise it when it's left the building. 445 00:21:24,761 --> 00:21:27,161 Can you please stop singing that song? 446 00:21:33,641 --> 00:21:35,081 So, um... 447 00:21:36,081 --> 00:21:40,241 ..how is, uh...how's every other little thing in your life? 448 00:21:40,401 --> 00:21:42,361 How's, uh...how's business going? 449 00:21:42,521 --> 00:21:44,001 It's fine. 450 00:21:44,161 --> 00:21:45,641 Why do you ask? 451 00:21:45,801 --> 00:21:47,121 Oh, no, just...just wondering. 452 00:21:47,281 --> 00:21:48,641 Shit, how much? 453 00:21:48,801 --> 00:21:50,521 Mate, it doesn't always have to be about... 454 00:21:50,681 --> 00:21:53,441 - How much, Cleave? - About 90. Quite quickly. 455 00:21:53,601 --> 00:21:56,561 - Fuck. - Oh, mate. It's the drivers. 456 00:21:56,721 --> 00:21:58,441 These are serious guys. 457 00:21:58,601 --> 00:22:02,001 They seem to run the planet and I've lost one of their cats. 458 00:22:07,561 --> 00:22:09,201 I'll get him. 459 00:22:19,321 --> 00:22:21,041 Not a word from you. 460 00:22:21,201 --> 00:22:24,841 OK, not a syllable from you. 461 00:22:25,961 --> 00:22:31,441 So, here I was thinking that I was about to be charged with terrorism 462 00:22:31,601 --> 00:22:34,041 and that'd be fine because I could defend that, but no. 463 00:22:34,201 --> 00:22:37,321 The charge is fraudulent use of government property 464 00:22:37,481 --> 00:22:39,961 for personal financial gain, OK? 465 00:22:40,121 --> 00:22:41,641 And that's provable. 466 00:22:41,801 --> 00:22:43,081 The fucking creche. 467 00:22:43,241 --> 00:22:44,641 It was a community service. 468 00:22:44,801 --> 00:22:46,321 She's been charging for it. 469 00:22:46,481 --> 00:22:47,761 - I mean, I assumed she... - OK. 470 00:22:47,921 --> 00:22:49,401 ..you know, she'd be covering the costs 471 00:22:49,561 --> 00:22:51,401 of, you know, cheese sticks and party pies. 472 00:22:51,561 --> 00:22:53,321 How much money do you think she's made from this thing? 473 00:22:53,481 --> 00:22:55,081 I don't... I'm not sure exactly. 474 00:22:55,241 --> 00:22:56,801 Rough guess. 475 00:22:56,961 --> 00:23:00,001 120, 130... 476 00:23:00,161 --> 00:23:01,921 - Thousand? - Yep. 477 00:23:02,081 --> 00:23:03,401 - Dollars? - Yep. 478 00:23:05,001 --> 00:23:07,161 All declared to the Tax Office, I'm assuming. 479 00:23:07,321 --> 00:23:12,681 There is a serious shortage of good childcare in the city. 480 00:23:12,841 --> 00:23:14,841 Yeah, and, um... 481 00:23:15,001 --> 00:23:17,921 So, what did you do with this money? 482 00:23:18,081 --> 00:23:21,241 I put it under your mattress at my place. 483 00:23:21,401 --> 00:23:24,121 Under my mattress, did you? 484 00:23:24,281 --> 00:23:29,241 And so how much money do you think the nice policeman found 485 00:23:29,401 --> 00:23:30,681 under my mattress? 486 00:23:30,841 --> 00:23:33,881 I think the policeman found about 100. 487 00:23:34,041 --> 00:23:35,081 100,000? 488 00:23:35,241 --> 00:23:36,921 Yeah, I mean, we spent a little bit 489 00:23:37,081 --> 00:23:38,721 and then we've got a lot of family back in Poland. 490 00:23:38,881 --> 00:23:39,961 Oh, yeah. 491 00:23:40,121 --> 00:23:43,961 And, um, oh, I put on, uh, a deposit for a school for lain. 492 00:23:44,121 --> 00:23:45,361 Oh, good. 493 00:23:45,521 --> 00:23:52,041 And, so, the nice man literally found $100,000 under my mattress? 494 00:23:52,201 --> 00:23:53,561 - It sounds bad, but... - Doesn't it? 495 00:23:53,721 --> 00:23:55,881 Yeah. It just...snowballed. 496 00:23:56,041 --> 00:23:57,281 It got really out of control. 497 00:23:57,441 --> 00:23:59,281 I mean the kids just adore Mama. 498 00:23:59,441 --> 00:24:01,281 - Do they? - And...and the parents adore Mama. 499 00:24:01,441 --> 00:24:03,041 Do they? OK. 500 00:24:03,201 --> 00:24:05,801 Here's how we're gonna play this. Alright. 501 00:24:07,361 --> 00:24:11,081 You don't speak a word of English, alright? 502 00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:13,601 I don't want to hear another word of English from you 503 00:24:13,761 --> 00:24:16,281 until all this fucknuttedness is over, yeah? 504 00:24:16,441 --> 00:24:19,321 You don't speak a word of Polish. 505 00:24:19,481 --> 00:24:20,401 I'm fluent. 506 00:24:20,561 --> 00:24:23,681 You don't speak a word of the bastard, alright? 507 00:24:23,841 --> 00:24:25,321 That's the game. 508 00:24:25,481 --> 00:24:28,321 It's all about confusion, yeah? 509 00:24:28,481 --> 00:24:30,361 You came out here as a little girl, 510 00:24:30,521 --> 00:24:33,001 your parents were constantly squabbling in Polish... 511 00:24:33,161 --> 00:24:34,921 I mean, they fought a little bit, but they didn't... 512 00:24:35,081 --> 00:24:38,121 Your parents were constantly squabbling in Polish, 513 00:24:38,281 --> 00:24:40,201 and that's why you've never embraced their language 514 00:24:40,361 --> 00:24:43,521 because...because it stunted you emotionally, OK? 515 00:24:43,681 --> 00:24:47,561 Hence, your mum and you have always had these kind of mix-ups, 516 00:24:47,721 --> 00:24:49,881 these constant misinterpretations. 517 00:24:50,041 --> 00:24:52,601 It's been an albatross around your neck since you were a little girl, 518 00:24:52,761 --> 00:24:54,481 and that's when you start to cry. 519 00:24:54,641 --> 00:24:56,801 Oh, do I have to cry? 520 00:24:56,961 --> 00:24:58,881 Yes, of course you have to cry! 521 00:24:59,041 --> 00:25:00,921 Are you crazy? How long have you been working for me? 522 00:25:04,161 --> 00:25:08,081 There's always been this void, a void between us. 523 00:25:08,241 --> 00:25:09,321 My mother and I, 524 00:25:09,481 --> 00:25:13,561 I mean, we just don't understand each other as a mother and a daughter. 525 00:25:15,121 --> 00:25:16,401 I... 526 00:25:16,561 --> 00:25:18,721 I mean, I...I love her. 527 00:25:18,881 --> 00:25:20,361 I don't know her. 528 00:25:21,681 --> 00:25:24,561 I've been...I've been in Canberra so busy. 529 00:25:24,721 --> 00:25:27,281 I didn't know she was running a creche. 530 00:25:28,521 --> 00:25:33,281 And my partner, Barney, ran off with a Monica Bellucci look-alike. 531 00:25:33,441 --> 00:25:36,041 And Cleaver Greene knows nothing about this! 532 00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:38,161 - I get the picture, Cleaver. - Do you understand? 533 00:25:38,321 --> 00:25:41,321 You don't speak any English, OK? 534 00:25:41,481 --> 00:25:42,721 Because you're about to be charged. 535 00:25:42,881 --> 00:25:45,161 Jakub will sort out the bail. 536 00:25:45,321 --> 00:25:46,801 Do you understand? 537 00:25:50,361 --> 00:25:53,281 Do you understand? 538 00:25:55,641 --> 00:25:56,841 So you'll defend us? 539 00:25:57,001 --> 00:26:00,001 I can't defend you - I'm not at the bar anymore. 540 00:26:00,161 --> 00:26:03,641 I'm gonna have to get an old friend to do it, or an old enemy. 541 00:26:03,801 --> 00:26:05,761 So he wasn't arrested for terrorism? 542 00:26:05,921 --> 00:26:07,201 What was he arrested for? 543 00:26:07,361 --> 00:26:09,121 His chief of staff's mother was running a creche 544 00:26:09,281 --> 00:26:10,881 out of his Sydney office. 545 00:26:11,041 --> 00:26:12,521 Misuse of public funds. 546 00:26:13,521 --> 00:26:15,441 Oh, well, next best thing. 547 00:26:15,601 --> 00:26:17,241 It'll be an open trial, Cal. 548 00:26:17,401 --> 00:26:19,161 Jack, would you excuse us? 549 00:26:19,321 --> 00:26:20,401 Sure. 550 00:26:20,561 --> 00:26:22,441 Jane, you may want to excuse yourself as well. 551 00:26:22,601 --> 00:26:23,921 Seriously. 552 00:26:35,841 --> 00:26:37,641 It's about what happened in the new... 553 00:26:37,801 --> 00:26:40,161 Well, that is to say the former Parliament House. 554 00:26:40,321 --> 00:26:42,721 Oh, gee. Is it the terrorists? Is there another plot? 555 00:26:42,881 --> 00:26:45,201 Because I am not backing away in a fight from this one, Joe. 556 00:26:45,361 --> 00:26:47,121 It's the last thing that people wanna see. 557 00:26:47,281 --> 00:26:49,481 Cal, there were no terrorists. 558 00:26:50,521 --> 00:26:52,601 - What? - It was dodgy plumbing. 559 00:26:53,961 --> 00:26:55,241 Stuffed electrics. 560 00:26:55,401 --> 00:26:56,641 Just a cigarette butt 561 00:26:56,801 --> 00:26:59,641 thrown at some inappropriately placed cleaning products. 562 00:26:59,801 --> 00:27:01,481 What are you saying? It was just... 563 00:27:01,641 --> 00:27:04,241 - What, an accident? - It was just an accident. 564 00:27:04,401 --> 00:27:07,081 But you guys were all over the news - from day one it was terrorism. 565 00:27:07,241 --> 00:27:08,321 Yeah, we thought it was for a bit. 566 00:27:08,481 --> 00:27:10,321 But, you know, that was before we found out 567 00:27:10,481 --> 00:27:12,161 actually what happened from the plumbers. 568 00:27:12,321 --> 00:27:14,401 Plumbers, what plumbers? 569 00:27:14,561 --> 00:27:16,881 Oh, the ones who just drowned? The brothers? 570 00:27:17,041 --> 00:27:18,761 As a matter of fact, that was them. 571 00:27:18,921 --> 00:27:22,121 - So, what, we... - We retrenched them. 572 00:27:22,281 --> 00:27:26,481 That's all. We retrenched them with extreme prejudice. 573 00:27:27,641 --> 00:27:29,641 Jesus. Why did you tell me this, Joe? 574 00:27:29,801 --> 00:27:31,041 Because you've got a choice, Cal. 575 00:27:31,201 --> 00:27:32,481 I have no choice! 576 00:27:32,641 --> 00:27:34,681 I have to go straight to the cops with this one. 577 00:27:34,841 --> 00:27:36,281 Legally, yes. 578 00:27:36,441 --> 00:27:38,441 But a number of us - Gareth, Angela, myself - 579 00:27:38,601 --> 00:27:41,401 will probably spend the rest of our fucking lives in prison. 580 00:27:41,561 --> 00:27:44,121 Oh, yeah, and what would be the downside for me? 581 00:27:44,281 --> 00:27:46,041 Your government would fall tomorrow, 582 00:27:46,201 --> 00:27:48,641 and you'd be the shortest-serving Prime Minister 583 00:27:48,801 --> 00:27:50,041 in this country's history. 584 00:27:50,201 --> 00:27:53,841 And what, you say, uh, Greene knows all about this? 585 00:27:54,001 --> 00:27:55,201 I don't know what Greene knows. 586 00:27:55,361 --> 00:27:57,281 And, what, he's facing an open trial? 587 00:27:59,521 --> 00:28:01,561 I don't know how he's going to get the evidence into it. 588 00:28:01,721 --> 00:28:03,361 Oh, it's Greene, you idiot! 589 00:28:04,561 --> 00:28:06,841 He doesn't care if he gets it into evidence. 590 00:28:07,001 --> 00:28:10,161 He's just gonna put on his circus act and all the press'll cover it. 591 00:28:10,321 --> 00:28:12,281 - Bubba. 592 00:28:22,441 --> 00:28:23,721 What the hell? 593 00:28:23,881 --> 00:28:25,921 What? 594 00:28:26,081 --> 00:28:27,881 Your hair. 595 00:28:28,041 --> 00:28:29,321 Oh, this. 596 00:28:29,481 --> 00:28:31,561 Oh. Just trying out a new look. 597 00:28:33,041 --> 00:28:36,401 - Miss... - Oh, God. Really? 598 00:28:38,001 --> 00:28:39,361 Really? 599 00:28:40,761 --> 00:28:44,001 Is this...is this really all it takes, Fuzz? 600 00:28:44,161 --> 00:28:46,601 Fuzz, it's a stupid wig and glasses. 601 00:28:47,961 --> 00:28:52,481 You know that if I take these off, um, I'm not a different person. 602 00:28:52,641 --> 00:28:55,521 I'm the exact same person that you said that you loved. 603 00:28:57,481 --> 00:29:00,241 Yeah, I imagined this being much more satisfying. 604 00:29:00,401 --> 00:29:02,321 The wig and the glasses. 605 00:29:04,121 --> 00:29:07,921 I mean, you know people have their... things, obsessions. 606 00:29:08,081 --> 00:29:10,601 - Oh, yeah. Fetishes? - Whatever. 607 00:29:10,761 --> 00:29:13,921 It's just...it's not necessarily something you can...you can control. 608 00:29:14,081 --> 00:29:16,561 Fuzz. You can't lecture me about fetishes. 609 00:29:16,721 --> 00:29:19,361 Yeah, I know. I mean you, you wrote all about them. 610 00:29:19,521 --> 00:29:21,441 I mean, come on, Miss, guys in closets 611 00:29:21,601 --> 00:29:24,281 wearing rubber gloves and catsuits, and I'm just... 612 00:29:24,441 --> 00:29:26,361 Fuzz, I don't care how old she is, 613 00:29:26,521 --> 00:29:30,161 and I know I've done a lot of weird shit in a previous life. 614 00:29:36,721 --> 00:29:38,161 You know what? 615 00:29:38,321 --> 00:29:40,041 Shocking as it may seem, 616 00:29:40,201 --> 00:29:42,001 I feel like I've reached a point 617 00:29:42,161 --> 00:29:46,121 where I want someone who just wants me. 618 00:29:58,481 --> 00:30:00,281 Fuck. 619 00:30:02,041 --> 00:30:05,481 So I've just been trying to do a deal with the DPP, right, 620 00:30:05,641 --> 00:30:08,121 but the government wants my seat so they want me out. 621 00:30:08,281 --> 00:30:10,601 So, I'm basically looking at three years in the slammer 622 00:30:10,761 --> 00:30:12,241 if I don't do a deal. 623 00:30:12,401 --> 00:30:14,561 But, if I plead guilty, that's the end of my political career, 624 00:30:14,721 --> 00:30:17,201 so I'm basically fucked, mate, I am fucked. 625 00:30:17,361 --> 00:30:20,601 To say nothing of the fact that I'm about to lose a digit or two, 626 00:30:20,761 --> 00:30:23,721 so, Fuzzy, if you could possibly see your way clear, mate, 627 00:30:23,881 --> 00:30:26,001 if you've got 90 lying around in a sock drawer somewhere, 628 00:30:26,161 --> 00:30:28,161 now would be the time to whip it out. 629 00:30:28,321 --> 00:30:30,441 Missy's playing mind games with me. 630 00:30:30,601 --> 00:30:33,081 Did you hear what I just said? 631 00:30:33,241 --> 00:30:36,681 Mate, I've made this observation about your generation before, 632 00:30:36,841 --> 00:30:38,241 about listening. 633 00:30:38,401 --> 00:30:39,841 She was wearing a wig. 634 00:30:40,001 --> 00:30:42,121 - I rest my case. - It was silvery grey. 635 00:30:42,281 --> 00:30:43,641 Fuck, mate. 636 00:30:43,801 --> 00:30:45,961 Well, a silvery grey wig, I mean, 637 00:30:46,121 --> 00:30:48,841 you'd like that, wouldn't you, with your special needs. 638 00:30:49,001 --> 00:30:50,681 She had these glasses on. 639 00:30:50,841 --> 00:30:52,881 I always had a thing for women in glasses. 640 00:30:53,041 --> 00:30:55,441 Oh, well, yeah, let's just have a chat about that. 641 00:30:55,601 --> 00:30:59,041 Let's talk about that as opposed to, the fact that your old man 642 00:30:59,201 --> 00:31:02,041 is going to end up back in the fucking clink again. 643 00:31:02,201 --> 00:31:03,721 Sorry. 644 00:31:05,081 --> 00:31:07,281 Dad, she knows I'm a Californian resident. 645 00:31:07,441 --> 00:31:10,521 She's probably freezing my assets as we speak. 646 00:31:10,681 --> 00:31:14,121 Freezing your assets. Right, OK. 647 00:31:14,281 --> 00:31:19,801 So that...and that'd be where any kind of potential loany thing 648 00:31:19,961 --> 00:31:21,361 might be coming from. 649 00:31:21,521 --> 00:31:24,801 - Yeah. That's where the money is. - See, that's no good. 650 00:31:24,961 --> 00:31:28,081 I'm about to start shedding fingers. 651 00:31:29,721 --> 00:31:32,321 Alright, mate, I'll be back in a jiffy. OK. 652 00:31:33,841 --> 00:31:35,921 - This has to stop. - What? 653 00:31:36,081 --> 00:31:37,921 You can't punish Fuzz. 654 00:31:38,081 --> 00:31:39,761 - Oh, I can't punish Fuzz? - No. 655 00:31:39,921 --> 00:31:42,281 On what basis would I not want to punish Fuzz? 656 00:31:42,441 --> 00:31:43,721 Compassion. 657 00:31:43,881 --> 00:31:45,441 Compassion? 658 00:31:45,601 --> 00:31:48,001 Come on, come on, I showed you compassion, haven't I, 659 00:31:48,161 --> 00:31:51,201 over the last years or so when you've needed it. 660 00:31:51,361 --> 00:31:52,561 - Cleave. - Yeah. 661 00:31:52,721 --> 00:31:55,401 I don't know if compassion has really been the mixer 662 00:31:55,561 --> 00:31:57,441 in the cocktail of our relationship. 663 00:31:57,601 --> 00:32:00,281 You cannot freeze his US assets. 664 00:32:00,441 --> 00:32:03,521 That would be a disaster for him, for you, for Winnie. 665 00:32:03,681 --> 00:32:05,841 I mean, that would put her in a very vulnerable situation. 666 00:32:06,001 --> 00:32:09,121 Freeze his US assets? I didn't even think of that. 667 00:32:09,281 --> 00:32:12,121 Well, good, because that's a terrible idea. 668 00:32:12,281 --> 00:32:14,721 That would give me a lot of bargaining power. 669 00:32:14,881 --> 00:32:16,361 Just let's turn the heat down. 670 00:32:16,521 --> 00:32:18,681 And now that he's a resident of California, 671 00:32:18,841 --> 00:32:21,481 well, the courts are very sympathetic to abandoned mothers. 672 00:32:21,641 --> 00:32:25,601 Come on! This is the father of your beautiful daughter. 673 00:32:25,761 --> 00:32:27,241 Where's your humanity? 674 00:32:27,401 --> 00:32:29,561 How much do you need from him? 675 00:32:31,121 --> 00:32:32,241 90. 676 00:32:34,001 --> 00:32:35,481 Quickly. 677 00:32:35,641 --> 00:32:38,041 Look, Cleave, I don't want to hurt him badly, 678 00:32:38,201 --> 00:32:40,761 but I think its only fair that he feels some pain, 679 00:32:40,921 --> 00:32:44,161 and I've already spoken to a hotshot lawyer in San Francisco. 680 00:32:44,321 --> 00:32:46,041 Oh, see, that's a terrible... that's terrible... 681 00:32:46,201 --> 00:32:49,241 You don't need some smart-arse, frisking prick coming in here, 682 00:32:49,401 --> 00:32:51,281 and stealing 40% of your income. 683 00:32:51,441 --> 00:32:52,721 It's a terrible idea. 684 00:32:52,881 --> 00:32:54,961 We're family, we sort this shit out tonight. 685 00:32:55,121 --> 00:32:56,401 Come on! 686 00:32:56,561 --> 00:32:59,721 What...what sort of a split are you after? 687 00:32:59,881 --> 00:33:02,041 70/30 his way, current and future assets, 688 00:33:02,201 --> 00:33:04,481 and four grand a week maintenance. 689 00:33:04,641 --> 00:33:07,761 That's for rent, clothing, schooling, holidays, 690 00:33:07,921 --> 00:33:09,961 everything Winnie needs until she's 18. 691 00:33:10,121 --> 00:33:13,001 OK. I can't make any promises. 692 00:33:14,241 --> 00:33:15,761 50/50's what she's after, mate. 693 00:33:15,921 --> 00:33:19,681 50/50 on the assets, 10 grand for Winnie until she's 25. 694 00:33:19,841 --> 00:33:21,361 - 10 fucking grand! - That's where we are. 695 00:33:21,521 --> 00:33:23,201 Are you...? This is fucking bullshit. 696 00:33:23,361 --> 00:33:25,001 That's where she is, mate. There's nothing I can do. 697 00:33:25,161 --> 00:33:26,641 I can do better in California. 698 00:33:26,801 --> 00:33:29,121 I'll get a fucking team of lawyers, a fucking division of them. 699 00:33:29,281 --> 00:33:31,561 - You think you could. - And she'll fucking pay me. 700 00:33:31,721 --> 00:33:33,441 - No, no, don't talk like that. - Fuck! 701 00:33:33,601 --> 00:33:36,721 Listen, there's a chance it's just a opening gambit, alright? 702 00:33:36,881 --> 00:33:39,201 Oh, mate, I'm finding this too stressful. 703 00:33:39,361 --> 00:33:40,681 Yes, I can see that. 704 00:33:40,841 --> 00:33:42,801 - If you can sort this out tonight... - Mm? 705 00:33:42,961 --> 00:33:44,961 ..then I will look after you. 706 00:33:45,121 --> 00:33:46,641 Yeah. 707 00:33:46,801 --> 00:33:47,921 OK. 708 00:33:48,081 --> 00:33:51,441 Well, that's very kind, thank you. 709 00:33:51,601 --> 00:33:54,641 OK, well, what about we say 710 00:33:54,801 --> 00:33:59,081 something like 70/30 your way on the assets. 711 00:33:59,241 --> 00:34:00,201 Yep. 712 00:34:00,361 --> 00:34:01,961 Something like... 713 00:34:02,121 --> 00:34:06,881 ..four grand for Winnie a week until she finishes school. 714 00:34:07,041 --> 00:34:10,201 OK. Yeah, mate, if you can do that. 715 00:34:10,361 --> 00:34:13,321 - I'll try, I'll... No promises. - Oh, fuck. 716 00:34:13,481 --> 00:34:17,921 OK, he has reluctantly accepted your terms. 717 00:34:18,081 --> 00:34:21,401 I have prepared a shortform memorandum of understanding. 718 00:34:21,561 --> 00:34:23,841 Both copies are in with Fuzz as we speak. 719 00:34:24,001 --> 00:34:25,401 You should sign them tonight 720 00:34:25,561 --> 00:34:29,321 and I can get it into the proper legal sewer on your behalf, OK? 721 00:34:29,481 --> 00:34:33,481 So, I will be needing my 90 grand, pretty much tomorrow, 722 00:34:33,641 --> 00:34:39,521 and I would appreciate you backing me up on that as a term of the MOU. 723 00:34:39,681 --> 00:34:41,481 Fine. 724 00:34:42,601 --> 00:34:43,481 Good. 725 00:34:59,601 --> 00:35:02,081 Hey, what's going on? 726 00:35:03,641 --> 00:35:06,961 Oh, just putting out another one of life's little spot fires. 727 00:35:07,121 --> 00:35:08,481 You're welcome. 728 00:35:08,641 --> 00:35:11,801 ♪ Terry is a monkey and he's very funky 729 00:35:11,961 --> 00:35:13,521 ♪ Bopping in a tree... ♪ 730 00:35:13,681 --> 00:35:16,841 Does he have to parade around like a sex pest? 731 00:35:17,001 --> 00:35:19,481 Can we get him a full-length dress, do you think? 732 00:35:19,641 --> 00:35:22,481 ♪ Bananas, bananas Let's go bananas... ♪ 733 00:35:22,641 --> 00:35:24,521 Mate, nobody's laughing. 734 00:35:24,681 --> 00:35:26,041 ♪ You and me... ♪ 735 00:35:26,201 --> 00:35:28,121 - What's that? 736 00:35:28,281 --> 00:35:30,241 Is that Fuzz and Missy? 737 00:35:32,161 --> 00:35:35,601 - What did you say to them? - What are they doing? 738 00:35:35,761 --> 00:35:37,401 What are they doing? 739 00:35:39,241 --> 00:35:42,281 - Fuck off, Cleave. - Oh, are you done? 740 00:35:46,561 --> 00:35:48,161 Oh, come on, that's dis... 741 00:35:48,321 --> 00:35:50,841 It's not...it's not a barn, you know. 742 00:35:51,001 --> 00:35:53,121 Come! 743 00:35:57,121 --> 00:35:59,841 Oh, that's hilarious. 744 00:36:00,001 --> 00:36:02,601 - Oh, that's great, guys. 745 00:36:02,761 --> 00:36:04,601 Oh, I'm cacking myself. 746 00:36:04,761 --> 00:36:07,041 Great. Really fun. 747 00:36:07,201 --> 00:36:08,521 Where are my memoranda of understanding? 748 00:36:08,681 --> 00:36:10,001 - Why? - Because... 749 00:36:10,161 --> 00:36:11,561 Because it's your way of getting 90 grand? 750 00:36:11,721 --> 00:36:14,041 No, but there was more to it than that. 751 00:36:14,201 --> 00:36:16,161 Well, what was it, Cleave, because we don't want to sign it. 752 00:36:16,321 --> 00:36:18,761 We think that we can come to an agreement on our own terms, 753 00:36:18,921 --> 00:36:21,081 in our own time, if we even have to. 754 00:36:21,241 --> 00:36:24,081 We had a perfectly good, functioning divorce going 755 00:36:24,241 --> 00:36:28,721 and you two have just treated it with complete contempt. 756 00:36:28,881 --> 00:36:31,801 Also, I never asked for a 50/50 split, Cleave. 757 00:36:31,961 --> 00:36:35,761 It was a negotiation, guys. Neither of you is a lawyer. 758 00:36:35,921 --> 00:36:38,361 - You were trying to shake us down. - That is... 759 00:36:38,521 --> 00:36:41,521 I wasn't asking for a gift from you, 760 00:36:41,681 --> 00:36:44,881 I was trying to get a loan, OK? 761 00:36:45,041 --> 00:36:47,161 From my own flesh and blood. 762 00:36:47,321 --> 00:36:50,241 - A loan to you is a gift, Cleave. - Oh, too much to ask! 763 00:36:50,401 --> 00:36:51,321 Wow. 764 00:36:51,481 --> 00:36:53,521 Well, that's just lovely. 765 00:36:53,681 --> 00:36:58,601 And I'm glad you're both having a good laugh and you're all so happy. 766 00:36:58,761 --> 00:37:02,641 Well, one thing's for sure - you can say goodbye to this. 767 00:37:08,121 --> 00:37:09,801 Cleave, this isn't about you. 768 00:37:09,961 --> 00:37:12,401 Yes, it is. What do you mean, it's not about me? 769 00:37:12,561 --> 00:37:14,681 It's as much about me as it is about you. 770 00:37:14,841 --> 00:37:16,281 You just think it's not about me 771 00:37:16,441 --> 00:37:18,321 because you think it's just about you. 772 00:37:18,481 --> 00:37:19,641 Stop it. 773 00:37:19,801 --> 00:37:22,081 So, what, are you going to get married or something? 774 00:37:22,241 --> 00:37:25,161 Yeah, we're going to have a big white wedding, 775 00:37:25,321 --> 00:37:28,201 and we're going to have roses strewn down the aisle 776 00:37:28,361 --> 00:37:31,681 and John Paul Young is hopefully going to sing Love is in the Air, 777 00:37:31,841 --> 00:37:34,681 and there's going to be tulle everywhere, especially on the men! 778 00:37:34,841 --> 00:37:37,281 Fine, so that's a no. 779 00:37:38,681 --> 00:37:40,841 He is your son. 780 00:37:41,001 --> 00:37:42,601 Mm? 781 00:37:43,841 --> 00:37:47,241 But I am happy, though. 782 00:37:47,401 --> 00:37:51,281 - Really. - Yeah, scarily so. 783 00:37:51,441 --> 00:37:55,281 Well, good, because you deserve to be. 784 00:37:55,441 --> 00:37:57,761 Yeah, I know I do. 785 00:38:09,561 --> 00:38:12,881 - Checkmate. - What, no? 786 00:38:13,041 --> 00:38:14,001 - Mm. - No! 787 00:38:14,161 --> 00:38:17,041 - Oh. - What, that's, what, six moves? 788 00:38:20,681 --> 00:38:21,881 I'm very good at this game. 789 00:38:22,041 --> 00:38:24,401 Yeah, well, three games in 20 minutes, I can tell. 790 00:38:24,561 --> 00:38:25,841 Mm. 791 00:38:26,001 --> 00:38:27,881 On our second date I played with Cleaver 792 00:38:28,041 --> 00:38:29,601 and, um, I thrashed him so badly 793 00:38:29,761 --> 00:38:31,841 that he refused to ever play me again. 794 00:38:32,001 --> 00:38:34,041 Why does that not surprise me? 795 00:38:35,201 --> 00:38:37,041 - Do you want to play Scrabble? - Well, that depends. 796 00:38:37,201 --> 00:38:38,721 How good are you at Scrabble? 797 00:38:38,881 --> 00:38:40,561 I'm even better at Scrabble than I am at chess. 798 00:38:40,721 --> 00:38:43,001 - Really? - Especially if it's dirty Scrabble. 799 00:38:43,161 --> 00:38:44,321 Ah. 800 00:38:44,481 --> 00:38:46,001 - Mm. - You want to play dirty Scrabble? 801 00:38:46,161 --> 00:38:48,921 Oh, my God, if I get a F and a K and I play it on triple word, 802 00:38:49,081 --> 00:38:50,721 you are gone. 803 00:38:52,041 --> 00:38:55,801 So, um, does that mean maybe tonight we will... 804 00:38:59,281 --> 00:39:02,521 It's been so nice kissing and fooling around, 805 00:39:02,681 --> 00:39:05,361 and...you know, 806 00:39:05,521 --> 00:39:07,401 but we're not going to be a couple, David. 807 00:39:07,561 --> 00:39:08,881 You know that. 808 00:39:10,641 --> 00:39:12,081 Yeah. 809 00:39:12,241 --> 00:39:14,601 It's just I've been looking after other people my whole life, 810 00:39:14,761 --> 00:39:16,201 you know, I do it for a living, 811 00:39:16,361 --> 00:39:20,481 and I...I really need to look after myself. 812 00:39:20,641 --> 00:39:23,081 And I can only do that on my own. 813 00:39:23,241 --> 00:39:26,161 And I know, I know that there is someone out there for you 814 00:39:26,321 --> 00:39:28,001 and she will be amazing. 815 00:39:28,161 --> 00:39:31,761 And she will come out of nowhere and she won't be a politician 816 00:39:31,921 --> 00:39:34,881 or a therapist or a call girl 817 00:39:35,041 --> 00:39:37,841 or a, you know, lawyer. 818 00:39:38,001 --> 00:39:40,361 She'll just be meant for you. 819 00:39:42,441 --> 00:39:44,281 And sincerely, my wish for you 820 00:39:44,441 --> 00:39:46,761 is that you can just surrender to your life 821 00:39:46,921 --> 00:39:49,201 and fuck off the instruction manual. 822 00:39:54,121 --> 00:39:55,361 Well, me too. 823 00:40:01,521 --> 00:40:03,041 Evening. 824 00:40:06,641 --> 00:40:08,681 - A couple of things... - Before you start. 825 00:40:08,841 --> 00:40:10,721 Just let me tell you this. 826 00:40:10,881 --> 00:40:15,441 You are an idiot for losing that woman. 827 00:40:15,601 --> 00:40:17,161 - Do you know that? - Oh. 828 00:40:17,321 --> 00:40:18,801 Oh, is that right, mate. Oh, well, thanks... 829 00:40:18,961 --> 00:40:19,801 That's right. 830 00:40:19,961 --> 00:40:22,081 Oh, thanks for helping me out with that. That's great. 831 00:40:22,241 --> 00:40:24,361 Here's a couple of things for you, OK? 832 00:40:24,521 --> 00:40:28,081 If you're gonna be spending any length of time in this house, 833 00:40:28,241 --> 00:40:31,961 I would appreciate it if you didn't do it in Wendy's nighties, OK? 834 00:40:32,121 --> 00:40:36,161 'Cause I find that a little offensive to mine eye, if you understand. 835 00:40:36,321 --> 00:40:37,681 Exactly why did you give her up? 836 00:40:37,841 --> 00:40:39,601 Mate, that's my business. 837 00:40:39,761 --> 00:40:41,481 - Was it for fun? - I'm a free spirit. 838 00:40:41,641 --> 00:40:43,201 - You wouldn't understand... - You know what? 839 00:40:43,361 --> 00:40:45,201 - Such a fuckin' old... - Free spirit! 840 00:40:45,361 --> 00:40:46,601 - Do you know what? - I'm like Bowie... 841 00:40:46,761 --> 00:40:48,641 - If that is being you... - ..or Marley... 842 00:40:48,801 --> 00:40:51,201 ..I don't want to be you. 843 00:40:51,361 --> 00:40:55,161 Mate, you couldn't be me if your fuckin' life depended on it. 844 00:40:55,321 --> 00:40:56,961 - Look at you! - Look at me? 845 00:40:57,121 --> 00:40:58,681 And then look at me, alright? 846 00:40:58,841 --> 00:41:01,441 - That's why you couldn't be me. - Is that right? 847 00:41:01,601 --> 00:41:04,161 Yeah, regrettably, you are you. 848 00:41:04,321 --> 00:41:05,481 Do you know what you are? 849 00:41:05,641 --> 00:41:08,281 - You're a dirty ibis. - You are a human turd. 850 00:41:08,441 --> 00:41:10,441 Mate, you're a fuckin' turd. 851 00:41:12,881 --> 00:41:14,361 - Get out of here! 852 00:41:14,521 --> 00:41:16,081 Oh, mate, I've got a lot of this! 853 00:41:16,241 --> 00:41:17,321 I've got a lot of this. 854 00:41:17,481 --> 00:41:19,121 You certainly do have a lot. 855 00:41:19,281 --> 00:41:20,281 - Turd! Turd! - Turd! 856 00:41:27,441 --> 00:41:29,081 Are they really that delicate? 857 00:41:29,241 --> 00:41:32,481 Are you fucking...kidding me? 858 00:41:32,641 --> 00:41:35,201 Oh...oh... 859 00:41:35,361 --> 00:41:37,321 Oh, God. 860 00:41:37,481 --> 00:41:40,081 You know, I really need a drink. 861 00:41:40,241 --> 00:41:43,921 Oh, see, now you really sound like me. 862 00:41:47,681 --> 00:41:52,001 So, new Parliament House, 863 00:41:52,161 --> 00:41:56,041 by which I mean the former Parliament House... 864 00:41:56,201 --> 00:41:57,321 What? 865 00:41:57,481 --> 00:42:01,241 You're on the committee of inquiry, aren't you? 866 00:42:01,401 --> 00:42:02,281 Yes, yeah. 867 00:42:02,441 --> 00:42:04,241 How they gained access, whatever shit they used, 868 00:42:04,401 --> 00:42:06,961 but, you know, the science isn't easy, so... 869 00:42:07,121 --> 00:42:10,481 See, I think 'shit' might be the operative word. 870 00:42:10,641 --> 00:42:11,721 What do you mean? 871 00:42:11,881 --> 00:42:16,641 Well, I have a feeling the whole thing might have been about poo. 872 00:42:16,801 --> 00:42:18,601 Poo? 873 00:42:18,761 --> 00:42:20,481 Poo. 874 00:42:20,641 --> 00:42:21,881 Why do you say that? 875 00:42:22,041 --> 00:42:25,761 Well, you know those two plumbers who died? 876 00:42:25,921 --> 00:42:27,521 - The ones who drowned? - Mm. 877 00:42:27,681 --> 00:42:31,601 They came to my place a while back and they did a bit of work, 878 00:42:31,761 --> 00:42:34,241 and they were interesting guys and we got to talking. 879 00:42:34,401 --> 00:42:38,721 And they were sent in under the tarp, 880 00:42:38,881 --> 00:42:41,001 and then a short time later... 881 00:42:43,161 --> 00:42:44,601 Why have you sat on this? 882 00:42:44,761 --> 00:42:47,361 Well, because they're dead now, 883 00:42:47,521 --> 00:42:51,001 which puts us in a very tricky position in terms of evidence, 884 00:42:51,161 --> 00:42:54,161 and because it's me and nobody's going to believe me. 885 00:42:54,321 --> 00:42:55,481 That's true. 886 00:42:55,641 --> 00:42:58,321 And if I'm right, I don't want to fuck it up. 887 00:42:58,481 --> 00:43:00,641 But that's where you come in. 888 00:43:00,801 --> 00:43:04,961 So, your theory is that this was basically sloppy maintenance 889 00:43:05,121 --> 00:43:09,441 made to look like a terrorist attack for political purposes? 890 00:43:10,761 --> 00:43:13,041 - That's the theory. - Christ. 891 00:43:15,081 --> 00:43:17,081 My committee doesn't sit for another month. 892 00:43:17,241 --> 00:43:18,881 Even then, without witnesses... 893 00:43:19,041 --> 00:43:20,881 I mean, we're talking about two, 894 00:43:21,041 --> 00:43:23,321 possibly three prime ministers lying. 895 00:43:23,481 --> 00:43:24,561 Mm-hm. 896 00:43:24,721 --> 00:43:26,561 - Well, how do we get it out there? - Here's the thing. 897 00:43:26,721 --> 00:43:29,921 I was thinking my creche case. 898 00:43:30,081 --> 00:43:33,401 - What's the relevance? - Mate, it's me. 899 00:43:33,561 --> 00:43:35,121 Huh? 900 00:43:36,321 --> 00:43:38,441 - You representing yourself? - Yes. 901 00:43:38,601 --> 00:43:41,801 But I'm going to need your backup. 902 00:43:41,961 --> 00:43:43,081 OK? 903 00:43:43,241 --> 00:43:47,001 And I'd sort out a reliable old enemy 904 00:43:47,161 --> 00:43:50,041 to represent Nicole and her mum. 905 00:43:52,681 --> 00:43:58,201 We are all children of someone, are we not? Of lesser or greater gods. 906 00:43:58,361 --> 00:44:00,001 As seven-year-olds, 907 00:44:00,161 --> 00:44:04,201 we all looked upon our futures assuming a rosy disposition. 908 00:44:04,361 --> 00:44:07,761 Why should life turn grey and thorny? 909 00:44:09,281 --> 00:44:14,641 One of the beauties of life is understanding myriad pricks... 910 00:44:15,801 --> 00:44:18,681 ..maintain a majestic pink rose... 911 00:44:18,841 --> 00:44:21,721 Ms Huntley-Brown, is there a point 912 00:44:21,881 --> 00:44:23,921 that your argument is searching for? 913 00:44:24,081 --> 00:44:26,321 Well, with the greatest respect, Your Honour, 914 00:44:26,481 --> 00:44:30,321 there is a question of context, which I'm sure you would appreciate. 915 00:44:30,481 --> 00:44:32,441 Not quite yet, no. 916 00:44:32,601 --> 00:44:33,441 Really? 917 00:44:33,601 --> 00:44:36,081 The concept of governments hiding the truth 918 00:44:36,241 --> 00:44:39,441 is as ancient as the concept of government itself. 919 00:44:39,601 --> 00:44:45,161 Your Honour, a shabby blue tarpaulin has shrouded our national parliament 920 00:44:45,321 --> 00:44:46,881 for some months, 921 00:44:47,041 --> 00:44:49,961 and that is not just a metaphor, that is a deceit. 922 00:44:50,121 --> 00:44:51,041 Ms Huntley-Brown, 923 00:44:51,201 --> 00:44:55,761 what has that got to do with a case about the misuse of public funds 924 00:44:55,921 --> 00:44:57,881 regarding an office in Sydney? 925 00:44:59,041 --> 00:45:00,801 I will see counsel in my chambers. 926 00:45:00,961 --> 00:45:02,081 All rise. 927 00:45:03,201 --> 00:45:05,521 What the fuck is going on, Hunter? 928 00:45:05,681 --> 00:45:07,641 I'll tell you what's going on. 929 00:45:07,801 --> 00:45:10,281 There's a giant blue condom hanging over our parliament. 930 00:45:10,441 --> 00:45:12,921 Forgive me, but I can't see the connection. 931 00:45:13,081 --> 00:45:15,401 If something horrible is happening to Parliament House, 932 00:45:15,561 --> 00:45:17,881 and it clearly is, that is deeply regrettable. 933 00:45:18,041 --> 00:45:21,081 But what has it got to do with this case? 934 00:45:21,241 --> 00:45:24,401 Reggie, the government is trying to cover up its own negligence. 935 00:45:24,561 --> 00:45:26,201 Their efforts to silence 936 00:45:26,361 --> 00:45:30,081 Senator Greene and Senator Potter's committee of inquiry and their staff 937 00:45:30,241 --> 00:45:31,761 is beyond sinister. 938 00:45:31,921 --> 00:45:36,241 The dead plumbers - do you really believe that was an accident? 939 00:45:36,401 --> 00:45:37,641 What?! 940 00:45:39,161 --> 00:45:42,801 I don't know how to express myself more clearly. 941 00:45:42,961 --> 00:45:47,121 I do not want this argument going on! 942 00:45:47,281 --> 00:45:49,801 It is irrelevant! 943 00:45:51,481 --> 00:45:53,561 I'm going to have to excuse myself. 944 00:46:00,801 --> 00:46:02,401 Very nice. 945 00:46:09,201 --> 00:46:11,161 - Ah, Your Honour. - Senator. 946 00:46:15,521 --> 00:46:17,761 - Oh, Senator. - Senator Potter. 947 00:46:17,921 --> 00:46:19,441 Your Honour. 948 00:46:20,841 --> 00:46:24,121 The passing of the Chief Justice is a great blow to us all. 949 00:46:24,281 --> 00:46:26,001 Indeed. 950 00:46:26,161 --> 00:46:28,881 I'm not sure if you're aware, Your Honour, 951 00:46:29,041 --> 00:46:30,841 but Senator Potter here is a member 952 00:46:31,001 --> 00:46:32,841 of the Senate Judicial Advisory Committee 953 00:46:33,001 --> 00:46:35,241 with the responsibility of advising the Attorney-General 954 00:46:35,401 --> 00:46:38,521 on, er, judicial appointments. 955 00:46:38,681 --> 00:46:41,921 You went to university with the Attorney, didn't you? 956 00:46:42,081 --> 00:46:43,961 Well, I certainly did. 957 00:46:44,121 --> 00:46:46,361 Well, just out of curiosity, has the, er... 958 00:46:46,521 --> 00:46:49,001 Has the Attorney indicated any replacement 959 00:46:49,161 --> 00:46:50,641 for the late Chief Justice? 960 00:46:50,801 --> 00:46:54,481 Ah...no. But there is a short list. 961 00:46:54,641 --> 00:46:55,641 Um... 962 00:46:56,881 --> 00:46:58,681 Changing the subject completely, 963 00:46:58,841 --> 00:47:03,081 I've prepared what might be described as an amicus brief... 964 00:47:03,241 --> 00:47:04,681 for Senator Greene. 965 00:47:04,841 --> 00:47:08,561 Background information that were he allowed to tender 966 00:47:08,721 --> 00:47:12,481 might prove useful in these proceedings. 967 00:47:13,641 --> 00:47:14,921 I see. 968 00:47:16,401 --> 00:47:17,641 Right. 969 00:47:19,121 --> 00:47:22,001 And what about the matter of relevance? 970 00:47:22,161 --> 00:47:23,321 How do I deal with that? 971 00:47:23,481 --> 00:47:25,401 Oh, well, look, Your Honour, 972 00:47:25,561 --> 00:47:28,481 in the unlikely event it should prove irrelevant, 973 00:47:28,641 --> 00:47:31,921 you could always instruct the jury to disregard it. 974 00:47:32,081 --> 00:47:33,881 Yeah, yeah, I could do that. 975 00:47:34,041 --> 00:47:36,281 In the interests of justice. 976 00:47:36,441 --> 00:47:37,641 Oh... 977 00:47:37,801 --> 00:47:40,241 - Your Honour. - Your Honour. 978 00:47:42,361 --> 00:47:45,681 Your Honour, the attempts by this government 979 00:47:45,841 --> 00:47:48,401 to silence me and my staff 980 00:47:48,561 --> 00:47:52,401 have reached...such an egregious level, 981 00:47:52,561 --> 00:47:55,321 that they now want to lock us up for looking after children. 982 00:47:55,481 --> 00:47:59,041 That is what government has become in this country. 983 00:47:59,201 --> 00:48:03,161 If your enemies won't shut up, lock them up for pastoral care. 984 00:48:03,321 --> 00:48:07,881 Quite frankly, Your Honour, after repeated attempts on my life... 985 00:48:08,041 --> 00:48:10,601 ..I feel quite lucky to be standing here. 986 00:48:10,761 --> 00:48:12,801 Objection, Your Honour! 987 00:48:12,961 --> 00:48:16,321 This is entirely irrelevant. 988 00:48:21,081 --> 00:48:22,281 Overruled. 989 00:48:23,361 --> 00:48:25,801 You may continue, Senator Greene. 990 00:48:30,441 --> 00:48:32,121 Thank you, Your Honour. 991 00:48:32,281 --> 00:48:38,721 Your Honour, there was no terrorist attack on Parliament House. 992 00:48:38,881 --> 00:48:41,801 It was quite simply a matter of poor plumbing. 993 00:48:41,961 --> 00:48:43,921 Holy fucking camole! 994 00:48:44,081 --> 00:48:45,481 See, I told you he'd get it in. 995 00:48:45,641 --> 00:48:47,241 We have to shut this troll down. 996 00:48:47,401 --> 00:48:49,121 Get the DPP to end it. 997 00:48:49,281 --> 00:48:50,441 On what grounds? 998 00:48:50,601 --> 00:48:52,161 On whatever grounds you can come up with. 999 00:48:52,321 --> 00:48:53,881 Martians have invaded. I don't give a shit. 1000 00:48:54,041 --> 00:48:55,321 That's why he's got the job. 1001 00:48:55,481 --> 00:48:58,321 - If he wants the job... - And the serious option? 1002 00:49:00,841 --> 00:49:02,921 Can we risk it? 1003 00:49:03,081 --> 00:49:04,481 Two plumbers are already dead. 1004 00:49:04,641 --> 00:49:05,841 Well, that had nothing to do with me. 1005 00:49:06,001 --> 00:49:09,121 - You knew about it. - We need to implode Parliament House. 1006 00:49:09,281 --> 00:49:11,841 Implode? What?! 1007 00:49:13,281 --> 00:49:14,361 Not on my watch. 1008 00:49:14,521 --> 00:49:18,041 Cal, at some point, the tarp is going to have to come off, 1009 00:49:18,201 --> 00:49:21,681 and some scientists that have been stripped of government funding 1010 00:49:21,841 --> 00:49:23,801 are going to go in there and quickly discover 1011 00:49:23,961 --> 00:49:25,481 there was no act of terrorism, 1012 00:49:25,641 --> 00:49:27,161 just some dodgy fucking plumbing. 1013 00:49:27,321 --> 00:49:31,241 So we say that in order to preserve the water table... 1014 00:49:31,401 --> 00:49:33,121 No, we say... 1015 00:49:33,281 --> 00:49:36,361 ..in order to preserve the city of Canberra, 1016 00:49:36,521 --> 00:49:39,441 that that Parliament House, built under Labor's watch, 1017 00:49:39,601 --> 00:49:41,161 is so toxic because of the terrorists, 1018 00:49:41,321 --> 00:49:43,201 it has to come down. 1019 00:49:43,361 --> 00:49:46,121 And we get to build a new one. 1020 00:49:46,281 --> 00:49:47,961 Thousands of jobs. 1021 00:49:48,121 --> 00:49:49,481 Ta-da! 1022 00:49:51,161 --> 00:49:52,681 I get to save Canberra. 1023 00:49:54,361 --> 00:49:56,001 And build a new parliament. 1024 00:49:56,161 --> 00:49:58,561 Yes, Prime Minister, you do. 1025 00:49:58,721 --> 00:50:00,721 Well, what about Greene. What about Potter? 1026 00:50:00,881 --> 00:50:01,961 How do we shut them up? 1027 00:50:02,121 --> 00:50:03,681 Potter'll shut up if we up the refugee budget 1028 00:50:03,841 --> 00:50:05,801 by, say, I don't know, 200 million. 1029 00:50:05,961 --> 00:50:07,721 200 mill? Christ! 1030 00:50:08,881 --> 00:50:11,961 Yeah, OK, OK, we can do that. 1031 00:50:12,121 --> 00:50:13,801 Greene? 1032 00:50:15,761 --> 00:50:17,041 We're not thinking... 1033 00:50:18,081 --> 00:50:19,481 How can we? 1034 00:50:19,641 --> 00:50:23,361 I mean, will any of us ever know sleep again if we do such a thing? 1035 00:50:23,521 --> 00:50:25,361 It's either that... 1036 00:50:26,801 --> 00:50:28,561 ..or we have to kill him. 1037 00:50:37,721 --> 00:50:39,441 Please, allow me. 1038 00:50:39,601 --> 00:50:41,401 Oh... 1039 00:50:47,041 --> 00:50:48,641 Ah. 1040 00:50:49,721 --> 00:50:51,401 Ah, thank you, mate. 1041 00:50:51,561 --> 00:50:53,481 - Orgh! 1042 00:50:53,641 --> 00:50:54,721 God! 1043 00:50:54,881 --> 00:50:57,601 Oh, mate! Why did you...? 1044 00:50:57,761 --> 00:51:00,241 Mate, I gave you 100 grand from under my mattress. 1045 00:51:00,401 --> 00:51:02,041 Well, there's still another 80. 1046 00:51:02,201 --> 00:51:04,441 But this will buy us more time with my people. 1047 00:51:04,601 --> 00:51:06,241 I've got bandages. 1048 00:51:08,961 --> 00:51:10,281 Hey. 1049 00:51:12,001 --> 00:51:13,441 - Hi. - Um... 1050 00:51:13,601 --> 00:51:15,721 I've got you a present. 1051 00:51:15,881 --> 00:51:17,641 Oh. 1052 00:51:19,721 --> 00:51:21,161 Oh, wow. 1053 00:51:26,561 --> 00:51:28,761 - Oh, it's beautiful. - Oh, good. 1054 00:51:28,921 --> 00:51:31,201 Um, I, um... 1055 00:51:31,361 --> 00:51:33,481 I just, um...you know, 1056 00:51:33,641 --> 00:51:38,361 it was really important to me that I acknowledge your resilience, 1057 00:51:38,521 --> 00:51:39,681 you know, 1058 00:51:39,841 --> 00:51:42,441 and your tenacity, and... 1059 00:51:43,921 --> 00:51:45,961 ..and our long, complicated history together. 1060 00:51:46,121 --> 00:51:47,601 And it is history, you know. 1061 00:51:47,761 --> 00:51:49,161 And... 1062 00:51:49,321 --> 00:51:52,801 Oh, God, I haven't done this for so long. Um... 1063 00:51:53,921 --> 00:51:56,121 But I loved you very much, you know, 1064 00:51:56,281 --> 00:52:00,441 and we made a beautiful, complicated young man together, 1065 00:52:00,601 --> 00:52:02,041 and... 1066 00:52:03,321 --> 00:52:05,561 ..I just really want you to know that, despite all the nonsense, 1067 00:52:05,721 --> 00:52:07,281 I don't regret a minute of it. 1068 00:52:08,961 --> 00:52:11,081 That just looks... That looks terrible. 1069 00:52:12,281 --> 00:52:14,281 No, it's beautiful. 1070 00:52:33,521 --> 00:52:35,121 Hey. 1071 00:52:37,281 --> 00:52:39,841 Hey. 1072 00:52:40,001 --> 00:52:41,681 G'day, mate. 1073 00:52:41,841 --> 00:52:43,041 - Hello, puss. 1074 00:52:43,201 --> 00:52:44,481 Oh! 1075 00:52:47,481 --> 00:52:49,521 Hello, mate. 1076 00:52:52,121 --> 00:52:54,401 - Princess! 1077 00:52:55,401 --> 00:52:56,761 How?! 1078 00:52:56,921 --> 00:52:59,321 See, I've been getting up early, mate, 1079 00:52:59,481 --> 00:53:00,601 and going searching 1080 00:53:00,761 --> 00:53:02,961 and she just ran straight into my arms. 1081 00:53:03,121 --> 00:53:04,881 I mean, she loves me. 1082 00:53:06,161 --> 00:53:07,761 You have a cuddle. I'll drive. 1083 00:53:07,921 --> 00:53:10,481 No, no, no, I'll drive. 1084 00:53:10,641 --> 00:53:12,321 Oh, no. Well, I... 1085 00:53:12,481 --> 00:53:13,721 Happy to drive... 1086 00:53:13,881 --> 00:53:15,801 Hap... 1087 00:53:24,161 --> 00:53:25,921 Oh, mate. 1088 00:53:26,081 --> 00:53:27,561 Hey, Cleaver. 1089 00:53:27,721 --> 00:53:29,281 I'm thinking... 1090 00:53:31,201 --> 00:53:33,801 ..don't worry about the remaining 80 grand. 1091 00:53:33,961 --> 00:53:35,321 It's forgiven. 1092 00:53:36,481 --> 00:53:40,321 All I really wanted was to have my Princess back. 1093 00:53:40,481 --> 00:53:41,801 Great. 1094 00:53:41,961 --> 00:53:43,681 Thanks, mate. Good on you. 1095 00:53:48,321 --> 00:53:51,961 I, Cleaver Augustus Greene 1096 00:53:52,121 --> 00:53:55,681 do swear allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth Il, 1097 00:53:55,841 --> 00:53:58,801 her heirs and successors, according to law, 1098 00:53:58,961 --> 00:54:03,561 that I will well and truly serve her and her successors 1099 00:54:03,721 --> 00:54:07,801 in the office of Chief Justice of the High Court of Australia, 1100 00:54:07,961 --> 00:54:11,601 and that I will do right to all manner of people according to law, 1101 00:54:11,761 --> 00:54:14,801 without fear or favour, 1102 00:54:14,961 --> 00:54:18,161 affection or ill will, 1103 00:54:18,321 --> 00:54:20,521 so help me God. 1104 00:54:24,761 --> 00:54:29,801 It's against the law to finger the Chief Justice's robes in this way. 1105 00:54:29,961 --> 00:54:32,121 - It's man-made, isn't it? - Hands off, OK? 1106 00:54:32,281 --> 00:54:34,081 - Hey. - Ah, yes. 1107 00:54:34,241 --> 00:54:37,761 Mmm. Jesus Christ on a bicycle. 1108 00:54:37,921 --> 00:54:40,441 Yes, isn't he just? 1109 00:54:40,601 --> 00:54:42,961 - There we go then. - Yes. 1110 00:54:44,241 --> 00:54:46,601 - Congratulations, Cleaver. - Oh, well, thank you, mate. 1111 00:54:46,761 --> 00:54:49,641 You know I own your arse now. 1112 00:54:49,801 --> 00:54:54,361 Oh, Cal, you've always been a shit lawyer, haven't you? 1113 00:54:54,521 --> 00:54:59,281 Because I'm Chief Justice, so I own YOUR arse. 1114 00:55:18,641 --> 00:55:23,641 So, uh, what's on the agenda today, Jakub? 1115 00:55:23,801 --> 00:55:26,481 Well, you have this case, Button and Dean. 1116 00:55:26,641 --> 00:55:29,241 - I could walk you through it. - Is it a yes or a no? 1117 00:55:29,401 --> 00:55:31,201 Definitely a no. 1118 00:55:32,201 --> 00:55:34,521 Then there's one involving my union 1119 00:55:34,681 --> 00:55:37,521 and whether we have over-exercised our rights 1120 00:55:37,681 --> 00:55:40,041 in terms of subcontracting. 1121 00:55:40,201 --> 00:55:42,441 That's a no as well, I take it. 1122 00:55:42,601 --> 00:55:45,361 In terms of equity, yes, Mr Chief Justice. 1123 00:55:45,521 --> 00:55:47,321 But you're the judge. 1124 00:56:22,041 --> 00:56:24,241 - Feel like a dip? - OK, darling. 1125 00:56:24,401 --> 00:56:25,801 Mmm. 1126 00:56:36,681 --> 00:56:38,321 Madame. 1127 00:56:57,961 --> 00:56:59,521 - Oh, God! - Are you OK? 1128 00:57:02,641 --> 00:57:04,481 Um, it's... Oh, hey? 1129 00:57:04,641 --> 00:57:05,761 Get them off me! 1130 00:57:05,921 --> 00:57:08,241 Can we get a little bit of help over here? 1131 00:57:08,401 --> 00:57:11,401 The Chief Justice of Australia, just so you know! 1132 00:57:11,561 --> 00:57:12,841 They're not coming off! 1133 00:57:13,001 --> 00:57:15,041 Oh, my God, well, can you just shake your face? 1134 00:57:15,201 --> 00:57:17,201 What, shut your face? Why? 1135 00:57:17,361 --> 00:57:18,801 Just shake your face. 1136 00:57:18,961 --> 00:57:20,121 Oh, my God! 1137 00:57:20,281 --> 00:57:22,361 There's one almost in your ear. 1138 00:57:22,521 --> 00:57:23,921 Oh, God! 85677