All language subtitles for Family.Time.S06E11.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H264-WhiteHat_track3_[eng]

[Instrumental Music]

- Right.
- Jus, jus, just a little off
the top.

- Got you, baby.
- Alright.

My bad, man. Watch out, man. You
see me walkin'.

Donnie!
[Laughing]

What you doin' with a Rubik's
Cube, man.

You gotta watch your step. You
bumpin' into my customers.

First of all, he bumped into me,
ok.

Second of all, it's not the
Rubik's Cube it's the glasses.

Turns out when you don't need
glasses. Puttin' on makes you
see worse.

Then why are you wearing the
glasses, dumbass.

Ah ha. Glad you asked.

Same reason I'm solving this
Rubik's Cube.

To prove that I am no longer a
doomass.

But you still look like a
doomass.

Ah ha! But appearances can be
deceptive.

See, ever since I found out that
my father's a brain surgeon,

I think that I inherited his
smart genes.

So, I've been trying to act like
it.

Last time you tried to act
smart, you was yelling into an

envelope trying to send a voice
mail.

[Laughing]

So, let me get this straight.
You think there are smart genes?

They got smart phone and smart
cars, why wouldn't they have
smart genes?

You know what.

Regardless of your ah,
intentions, I think getting to
know your roost is a good thing.

I always think it's good to know
where you're from. You know.

Why it don't matter.

Don't matter?

Look brother, I think if you
wanna get to know the present
you understand the past.

Naw, man. I don't buy that,

Shoot. Me and my family went to
Africa.

Went to the beach, where our
people were stolen from.

Mhmm. That must have been deep.

Yeah, it was deep.

My family was down on that beach
and all of them was cryin'.

- Mmm.
- And you know what I felt?

A deep connection with the
motherland?

Naw.

A felt a deep connection with my
Mother, man.

She had all the sandwiches and
wouldn't share with me.

Boy, you didn't feel a
connection?

Man, I was tryin' to connect,
but I wanted to connect a
sandwich to my mouth.

I'm just sayin', it ain't about
that.

Ok, brother. but technically
you're from there.

Yeah, my daddy from Cleveland.
Should I weep every time Lebron
change teams?

Ah ha! I solved it!

Turns out all you gotta do is
switch the stickers to the side
that
you want 'em to go on.

And you too, can be a genius.

You gotta do all sides though,
brother.

Well, I mean let start with the
one and see what happens.

♪ Woke and my wife said to me

♪ The bill collectors want
their fees

♪ Kids keep talkin' back to me

♪ Family Time

♪ Family Time, Family Time,
Family Time

[Instrumental Music]

Hey Lisa, you ever wondered
where you're from.

Ahh, we grew up in nearly the
same neighborhood, Tony.

No, I mean like where your
parent's parents are from.

My grandparents?

No, like your great, great,great, great grandparents.

Probably from Africa, Tony.

[Laughs]
Yeah, probably.

Your ancestors are probably fromAfrica too.

- Yes. I'm aware.- Ok.

No, I was just thinking about
lookin' into our genealogy.

Oh no, let's let sleeping dogs
lie.

Last time we went diggin' into
our past, we thought we werecousins.

Yeah, but we're not cousins.

Yeah, but what if we found out
we actually were?

That would definitely explain,
Devin

[Knocking]

This boy.

[Chuckles]

Oh, what's up Lisa? Girl you
gettin' thick, you better chill
out now.

Man, take off them glasses.

I think they make me look
smarter, Ton.

Quick ask me a question only a
smart person would know.

What's the capital of Lithuania?

Easy L.

He got you there, Tony.

It's not me, it's the glasses.

Let me see those.

Aw, naw. They wouldn't work for
brother. I got the smart genes.

Something smell good. Hey Lisa,
what you cookin'?

Um, not for you.

Cheryl's bringing over her man
tonight.

When will Cheryl realize to stop
messing with these scrubs. I'm
the one for her.

Ah, there six billion people in
this world,

and I'm sure she'd date half of
them before she'd think about
dating you.

Psst. There's no way she'd date
two and half billion dudes
before me.

Heh, she'd be too tired.

Who got that type of stamina?

Donnie, I'm thinking of looking
into my genealogy.

Aw, don't do that brother.

Stay away from that you never
know what you could find out.

What's the worse that could
happen?

Aww, man. That chick Ava
Duvernay, who made that Selma
movie...

She found out...

We the only ones here, right?

She found out her ancestors were
slaves.

I know.

It's not me, it's the glasses.
I'm tellin' ya.

I think it's good to know
things.

For better, or worse.

Yeah, what if you found your
ancestors were murders?

Some of them probably were.

Umm hmm, what if you found they
weren't Kobe fans?

That would hurt, but I would
find a way to work through it.

Alright, I'm in. Cover me.

Cover you?

Yeah, pay for my genealogy test.

I wanna find out, too.

I never agreed to pay for your
genealogy test.

I wonder if you ancestors were
as selfish as you are.

Hey, Lisa.

You paying?

[Instrumental Music]

Aww, man you put your foot in
this.

Thank you so much for having me
for dinner, Lisa.

Eh, I helped too.

Oh, Tony. What did you make?

Yes Tony, I would love to know
what part of dinner you helped
with.

I helped keep Lisa on task.

Ok, every time she got
distracted. I said come girl we
gotta finish this food.

We meetin' Cheryl's new
boyfriend tonight.

Well, I appreciate that brother.

My man.

How did you two meet?

Oh, it was basically a scene out
of a romantic comedy.

So there I am, downtown.

Fighting a parking ticket.

Which was totally unfair by the
way

I was barely parked in front of
that fire hydrant.

Oh, oh, oh, you're never suppose
to park in front of a hydrant.

And why is that, Lisa?

A fireman can't put a hose over
my car?

Yeah, that's the argument she
used in court.

Now, I'm, I'm a lawyer. I heard
everything.

I've never heard.

[Imitating Cheryl] A fireman
can't put a hose over my car,
argument.

[All Laughing]

I still had to pay the ticket.

And the judge almost held me in
contempt of court.

But Benjamin, had already
arrested my heart.

Mmm.

[Laughing]
Isn't that so cute, Tony?

Uh, that'll fade.

So listen as a lawyer, what is
like the dumbest criminal you
ever met?

Oh, I got one. I got one.

Listen so I had this potential
client who allegedly, he did it,
right.

Robbed a gas station, and then
made off with all the
scratch-offs.

So the police are interrogating
him and they have nothing on
him, ok.

I mean like the security footage
is fuzzy, and the cashier can't
pick him up out of a line up.

Ok, I'm guessing he's gonna mess
this up.

Oh yep, yep, yep. So the cop
says that due to

the value of the scratch-offs
this could be a felony.

Oh, that's funny. Cause I have a
scratch-off story myself.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, you won the
lottery.

Ok, we get it, stop
interrupting.

Anyway, right back to my
brilliant client, right,

So he tells the cops. I
scratched off all the

scratch-offs and they was
worthless.

[All Laughing]

But he has a little bit of luck
because I got him a misdemeanor

And a hard lesson in never talk
to the police.

He has like a million stories
like that.

Yes, and I have a lot more, but
I have to use the restroom.

Right down the hall.

[Laughing]

The incense are under the sink,
brother.

Isn't he terrific!?

He seems amazing.

[Over The Top] Oh yes girl, he's
fabulous.

No, no, in all seriousness. Um,
I think you have a winner.

- Really?
- Mmm hmm.

Oh my god, Tony. That means so
much to me.

It's so important that you guys
like him.

Hmm.

[Sighs]
Because...

I'm gonna propose to him.

[Laughs]
Yeah.

[Instrumental Music]

Wait you're going to propose to
Benjamin?

I know isn't it great?

Isn't it a little too, soon?

And I mean, don't proposals
usually happen the other way
around.

Ok, Tony. You are just to old
fashioned.

It's 2018.

Men propose to women, women
propose to men.

Men and women propose to each
other. It's wild.

I don't maybe I'm a little too
old fashion.

Ok, hold on now, hashtag time's
up.

I thought the playing field was
even now.

Ok, y'all need to make up y'all
minds.

I mean you're right.

I don't know, Cheryl maybe it's
too soon.

Oh..

Ok, it's too soon. That's easy
for you to say

because you know you're married
with two grown kids.

Look I know I'm flawlessly
fabulous with the skin

goddess and the body of a twenty
year old.

But time is gonna run out for me
too, Lisa.

Ok, do you have any idea how
expensive it is to freeze your
eggs?

And idea? It cost a lot. It's a
lot.

You know what. You can use our
fridge for free, if you want.

Use your fridge for what?

Uh, I was just proposing,
that...

- Umm.
- Welp, not propose, propose.

Ain't nobody proposin' about
nothing.

Mmm, I was just telling Cheryl,
that she can use our

fridge as a storage.

- Yeah for her eggs.
- For, um, ah, eggs.

Right, for I bought too many
eggs.

So, what can I say, I love a
good sale.

Ah, good girl. You know

fitness experts propose,,,

that eggs are an excellent
source of protein.

[Hitting Table]

[Instrumental Music]

Alright here's your's, Lisa.

This one's you, Donnie.

This one's me.

Alright let's find out where
we're from.

[Papers Rustling]

Whaaat?

Wher, wh, where are you from,
Tony?

Upt, it says here that I have
some,

some Kenyan, some Ghana, a
little West Indian,

and some Zulu.

Owh wow, Zulu.

Yeah, yeah. Look at this. It
says I'm a direct descendant of
Shaka.

Chaka Khan!?

Man, you are lucky, dude.

First you win the lottery. Now
you gonna inherit that "Ain't
Nobody" money.

Tell me something good.

Not that Chaka. Shaka Zulu.

Who's that?

He's one of the biggest African
monarchs.

This is amazing.

He was one of the most badass
military leaders of all time.

Ha.

I know he all disappointed that
his heir is some tame, suburban
husband.

[Laughing]
-Tame?

I can whoop your ass.

Let's change the subject. Lisa,
what are you?

Um, apparently I'm white.

You don't look white

Specially, with all that ass.

Right and them hip and them
lips.

Hey! Hey, hey!

Yeah, yeah. I mean according to
this colonial

French and English, with a
little scattered African.

Um hmm. Scattered in all the
right places.

[Gigglling]
- But,

I did know that, that, I could
tell you had a little bit of
white in ya.

How?

Cause you're always ordering
those fancy mocha-loca
yacki-aki, frappa-yappa-do's.

So what those are delicious.

[Laughing] I'm with Ton, on this
one Lisa.

Those yappa-dappy-frappy-do's
are definitely a white woman
thing.

What. Ever.

What'd you get, Donnie.

[Sighs]

It's hard to see with these
glasses on.

Take the damn glasses off man.

I am mostly Italian?

[Chuckles]
- Italian?

That's crazy. Cause you look,
black.

Then again, so did you Lisa.

I am black.

Oh, I know. I can smell them hot
combs burnin' at night.

Oh, psst, oh.

I guess it makes sense though.
Italians are the blackest of all
white people.

I mean they have darker skin,
they're very religious, and

they're both into organized
crime.

Ok, that's a very ugly
stereotype of both communities.

It's true, though! I mean the
bloods and crips might not be as

organized as the Cosa Nostra,
but you get the point.

Ah plus, Italians and black men
both share a certain type of

physical quality, if you know
what I mean.

Oh, that is right.

How you know that's true, Lisa?

Oh huh, Tony.

How you know it's true?

I don't know that it's true,
per se. I mean I think.

[Instrumental Music]

You know tell me again, why were
not doing this at your place?

Oh, because he'll never see it
coming here.

Yeah, I don't see Benjamin
seeing a proposal coming from
anywhere.

We already lit the candles and
put out the flowers.

You really want me to move
everything.

No, it's fine.

Ok, good. So can I practice on
you?

The proposal?

Yeah, I mean I've never proposed
to anyone before.

Yeah and I hope you never do it
again.

This is weirder than a DMX
Christmas album, but I'll go
along with it.

- Oh my god.
- Ok.

Don't start crying. No, no, no.
We're just practicing.

Ok. No It's just so beautiful.
I'm sorry, ok.

[Giggling]

[Sighs]

Benjamin, the last few months
have

I'm sorry. Can you just use my
name,

you know instead. I just really
need to get into it.

Oh yeah, yeah, sure.

[Sighs]

Lisa, the last few months have
been amazing.

And it made me realize that, I
wanna spend the rest of my life
with you.

And when you realize you wanna
spend the rest of your life with
someone,

you want the rest of your life
to start right now.

- Will you marry me?
- Yes!

[Both] Yes!

A thousand times yes. Oh my
gosh.

- It was good?
- We have to do invitations.

Yes, yes, oh my goodness.

I wanna renew my vows.

- Awwe.
- It was so good.

Can I be your maid of honor. Go,
go, go.

Wait, wait. Can I listen from
the kitchen?

No, only if you're very quiet.

Well you know this is my house
right?

I would die if people thought I
lived here.

Cheryl!

Benjamin, come in.

Door closing.

What is all this?

Where are Tony and Lisa?

Lisa. Uh, Benjamin.

Um, a, the last few months were
amazing. Ignore that.

Um,

I realized that you...

Wait, hold, hold on Cheryl.

This is all amazing, but...

I can't marry you.

[From Kitchen] Why the hell
not!

Lisa!

Yeah, why the hell not.

Cause I'm already married.

Oh my god, oh my god.

Wait a minute, Cheryl.

[Door Slams]

Hold on, hold on, just one
second.

One sec, one sec.

Wait, wait, wait, both shoes.
Damn.

[Instrumental Music]

[Instrumental Music]

What in the Chaka Khan are you
doin'?

Ah, ah, ah, it's Zulu, Shaka
Zulu.

Ton, Halloween been pass.

Man, what's goin' on, man.

ha haha ha!
Very funny,
that's funny.

[Jamaican Accent] Listen my
friend, I have just found out

that I am a direct descendant of
Shaka Zulu.

So, I'm trying to connect with
my roots.

You, you like an extra from
roots, man.

What the hell are you doin'.
man.

You feet ashy as hell, too. You
see that.

I do see this. This is how it is
in the mother land.

Look it is funny.

Make jokes at my expense, that
is fine.

It is not your fault.

Look Tony, I ain't got time for
this.

No, no, no, I'm not finished.

The reason why you make jokes
at my expense, is because

Your ignorance due to the fact
that you have lost your
connection to the Motherland.

I ain't got time for this, man.
I got customers, I gotta get
back to work.

You are right. You are right.

Get out of here, brother.

Go, go.

No, no, no, no, no, ah you go
back, man.

Ton, you gotta wait your turn.

A direct descendant of Shaka
Zulu does not require a turn.

My brother free yourself.

From the shackles of this
electronic device that has
fooled you

into believing it makes you look
more civilized.

Come, come, come.

Go, go, go.

Let your outward expression be
expressed.

Dog, what are you doin'? That's
one of my best customers.

Rodney, Rodney, Rodney.

[Grunt]

It is not your fault, but as a
friend.

I'm going to need you to stop

stripping our African American
ancestors

of their heritage with your dope
fades.

Man, you burning my face, man.

Sorry.

Your breath is like a
combination of zebra, and goat
ass.

Tony, if you don't stop chasing
customers outta my shop

With your fake Africa Bambaataa
lookin I'm gonna take my right
foot

and put it so far in your ass.

Hey, hey, hey.

[Speaking Like a Mafioso] If it
isn't all my friends in the
barbershop, huh.

Am I in the twlight zone? What's
going on?

Rodney, my friend.

Allow me to greet you with the
two customary kisses on the
cheek, Italian style.

Get in here, huh.

Yo, yo, yo. Do not kiss me, man.

I'mma gut you like a goat.

I'll ignore that.

Antonio.

- Hey.
- Whaaat's uuuppp?

How are you?

My friend. I am very good
actually.

Ah, let me explain.

Donnie, has just found out he is
Italian.

- Italian?
- Italian.

- Donnie?
- Yes.

Do that mean I get free bake
ziti?

That's offensive, I'll ignore
that.

Ok, I came here cause I
got an offer to make

yous that yous can't refuse.

Alright, cool let's hear it.

Take a walk with me.

So you run a business, eh.

Let's call it barber shop, huh.

Be shame if any thing happen to
it.

Or to yous.

Ok, Donnie. What are you gettin'
at, man?

Ah, it's a nice place.

Could use a little protection.

In exchange for my protection,
why don't you ah, give me some
of your profits.

Let me get this straight,
Donnie. You trying to shake me
down.

Hey man, look put the razor
down brother. I'm just trying
to connect with my roots.

Alright.

You know what you and African
Bambadda, y'all get over here

and you take your fake Donnie
Whacko self and these ashy ass
feet

and get the hell outta here. So
I can get back to my customers.

Y'all understand me?

You are right. You are right. I
will go back in no time.

- Get you some lotion, man.
- Ok.

- Hey, hey, Antonio.
- Yes.

How bout we get outta here and I
treat you to an African pizza,
huh?

A little cannoli, little
spinach, huh.

- Does it sound good?
- It sounds very good.

Let's get some lotion, I'll find
lotion.

So Rodney, it's always a
pleasure.

Be a shame if anything happened
to your place while I was gone.

Take it, ah.

I'm gonna...

Who next?

[Instrumental Music]

You had no idea he was married?

No, just a general feeling, that
everything was too good to be
true.

This is just how some guys are.

Yea. My ex-husband was a dirt
bag, he's a dirt bag.

You'll find the right one,
Cheryl.

Lisa, what if I don't.

You know, I'm worried I'm gonna
wind up settling.

I was strong enough to say no
when my ex-husband came crawling
back.

But what if i'm not strong
enough if he comes crawling
back?

And believe me he will come
crawling back.

- Ah.
[Knocking]

They always do.

Upt.

Speak of the devil. He came
crawlin' back, Cheryl.

Should I hide?

- No, no, no.
- What do I do?

Ok, I'm gonna let him in.

But no matter what he says.

You just tell him to hit the
road.

- Ok, hit the road. Yeah
- Ok.

- Hit the road, that's what you
tell him.
- Yeah.

Hi. Um...

- Cheryl, here?
- Umm hmm.

Wouldn't you like to know. You
cheatin', lyin'...

Lisa, Lisa.

I got it. Thank you, so much.

Thank you.

These are for you.

Oh, well that's sweet.

The "I'm so sorry, I forgot to
tell you I'm married." flowers.

Bye, hit the road.

Please, please, please, listen.
You ran out before I could
explain.

And you've been ignoring all my
phone calls.

Ok.

So here's your big chance.

So why don't you tell me the
real reason you didn't tell me
you have a wife.

We've been separated.

We've been separated for two
years now,

and the divorce doesn't get
finalized until a month from
now.

And you know how it is with two
lawyers. We've been nitpickin'
every part of the contract.

So, you're single.

No, I'm with you girl.

And I just got out of a
marriage. So if you don't mind.

Maybe we can slow walk into my
next one.

Yes, of course.

I'm not, I'm not in any rush.
I'm just...

I wanted you to know, that you
make me really happy.

[Mwah]
I'm gonna fix the flowers.

I can fix, I can put them in
water.

- I think I got a pitcher.
- Don't, don't worry. Don't
worry.

I plan on showering you with
many more.

Mmm.

For many, many, years to come.

Lisa.

- Ah, yeah.
- Can we get a moment.

Ump, don't you live around the
corner. Oh, ok.

Go on, girl.

This ain't a game.

[Instrumental Music]

[Instrumental Music]

We regret to inform you there
has been a terrible mix up in
our lab.

Please accept our deepest
apologies and your corrected
genealogy reports.

So, I'm not Italian?

I guess that's good.

Cause I kinda got tired of
gesturing with my hands like
this all the time.

Welp, let's find out what we
really are.

Ah man, I'm black.

Yeah, me too.

Well interesting enough, I found
out I'm a descendent of Abraham
Lincoln.

So you're both welcome.

Ha, and you're both free to go.

[Laughs]
Don't go see no plays.