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1
00:00:01,035 --> 00:00:04,205
[Instrumental Music]
2
00:00:04,238 --> 00:00:05,739
Mm...
3
00:00:05,773 --> 00:00:07,741
Hey, ready to go?
4
00:00:07,775 --> 00:00:08,942
Ready to go where?
5
00:00:08,976 --> 00:00:10,811
I just spent my entire
morning clearing my
6
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:13,714
schedule so that we
can spend some quality
time like you requested.
7
00:00:13,747 --> 00:00:16,584
And you thought quality
time was happening here?
8
00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:19,019
And why don't you
have on the clothes
I laid out for you?
9
00:00:19,053 --> 00:00:21,089
Laid out Lisa? This
is not the first day
of school.
10
00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:23,657
I'm not wearin' no khaki
shorts and a Hawaiian shirt,
11
00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:24,825
lookin' like Tim Duncan.
12
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,828
Oh, but you would look so
cute in that Hawaiian shirt.
13
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,630
And it'd be perfect
for our picnic.
14
00:00:29,663 --> 00:00:32,166
Picnic? I thought we were just
going to stay home.
15
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:34,602
You know, do the old GetFlix and
chill thing.
16
00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:37,071
But I want to go on a picnic
with my husband.
17
00:00:37,105 --> 00:00:38,972
And I already got tickets to the
botanical garden.
18
00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:41,609
Oh, great, flowers and whatnot.
19
00:00:41,642 --> 00:00:43,777
Lisa, you do know that we have a
backyard.
20
00:00:43,811 --> 00:00:45,646
And I already took the liberty
to get us two tickets
21
00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:47,448
to go skinny dipping in our
jacuzzi.
22
00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,483
You got a nice view of the
flowers from there, too.
23
00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:52,586
Can you please get your mind out
of the gutter? Please?
24
00:00:52,620 --> 00:00:54,888
As long as it keeps my ass out
of the garden.
25
00:00:54,922 --> 00:00:56,890
Okay, okay, I'll go, I'll go.
But I ain't gonna like it.
26
00:00:56,924 --> 00:00:59,827
- What was that?
- Nothing dear.
27
00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:01,629
[Knocking]
28
00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:04,332
Oh my God Lisa, there's a
strange man at the back door.
29
00:01:05,633 --> 00:01:07,668
- Hey.
- Hey, sis.
30
00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:09,970
Uh, you don't see nobody else
here?
31
00:01:10,003 --> 00:01:11,872
Yeah I see you, Thick James.
32
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,941
With your super-freakish lookin'
ass.
33
00:01:13,974 --> 00:01:16,009
Lisa, you better tell your
brother to watch his mouth.
34
00:01:16,043 --> 00:01:18,412
Okay, enough. Seriously.
35
00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:19,713
What's going on Rach?
36
00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:22,516
Nothing much I just
[Clears Throat]
need a small favor.
37
00:01:22,550 --> 00:01:25,519
Smaller than your mustache?
38
00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:29,157
First of all Lumpstious Lion, I
wasn't talkin' to you.
39
00:01:29,157 --> 00:01:33,261
But,
[Clears Throat]
it does involve you, so...
40
00:01:33,294 --> 00:01:34,428
It's, it's the smallest of
favors.
41
00:01:34,462 --> 00:01:36,930
Aw, now you need
something from me, huh?
42
00:01:36,964 --> 00:01:38,866
What is it, Rachel?
43
00:01:38,899 --> 00:01:40,768
I need to crash here for about a
week.
44
00:01:40,801 --> 00:01:42,370
[Laughing]
45
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:44,205
Oh, you serious? Hell no!
46
00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:45,906
Please! My house is getting
fumigated.
47
00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,375
It's infested with termites.
48
00:01:47,408 --> 00:01:49,577
Yeah, and one big-ass rat.
49
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,379
Listen Dumbo,
50
00:01:51,412 --> 00:01:53,681
before you go flyin' your
swollen ass all around here,
51
00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:57,185
just answer the damn question.
Can I crash here for a week or
not?
52
00:01:57,185 --> 00:01:59,086
Yes of course you can.
53
00:01:59,187 --> 00:02:00,354
Lisa how you just gonna, oh....
54
00:02:00,388 --> 00:02:03,090
You, you, know, know what? Yes,
yes.
55
00:02:03,191 --> 00:02:05,426
Yes, you can. Yes, you can. Mi
casa su casa.
56
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,296
- Really?
- Yeah girl, of course.
57
00:02:08,329 --> 00:02:10,631
You family, [Laughing] Yeah.
58
00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:12,366
And as a guest in my home,
59
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:14,268
you get to take my ticket
60
00:02:14,302 --> 00:02:15,803
to go with Lisa to the Botanical
Gardens.
61
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,538
You ladies enjoy, I'll be at the
barbershop.
62
00:02:17,871 --> 00:02:19,740
Oh, and tell the kids they're
welcome.
63
00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:20,908
For what?
64
00:02:21,074 --> 00:02:23,211
They always wanted a family pet,
now they got a Rachel.
65
00:02:24,345 --> 00:02:26,614
You better run you fat Charlie
Brown!
66
00:02:27,114 --> 00:02:29,217
* Woke up and my wife said to me
67
00:02:29,217 --> 00:02:31,619
* The bill collectors won't let
me be
68
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:34,054
* The kids keep talkin' back to
me
69
00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:35,689
* Family Time
70
00:02:35,723 --> 00:02:41,362
* Family Time, Family Time,
Family Time
71
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:43,731
[Instrumental Music]
72
00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,433
Hey y'all, I was thinkin'.
73
00:02:45,466 --> 00:02:46,867
Sleep should be rolled over.
74
00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:49,803
Like if I could sleep for 24
hours today,
75
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:52,139
I shouldn't get sleepy for three
days straight.
76
00:02:52,906 --> 00:02:55,643
You know the main problem with
that scenario is that you was
thinkin'.
77
00:02:56,244 --> 00:02:57,578
See that's gonna be the issue
with him every time.
78
00:02:57,611 --> 00:02:59,680
Tony, why do you keep bringin'
this fool over here?
79
00:02:59,947 --> 00:03:01,882
My car's in the shop and he's
cheaper than a Goober.
80
00:03:03,784 --> 00:03:05,953
Y'all just ain't on my level
man, that's the problem with
y'all.
81
00:03:05,986 --> 00:03:07,421
Hmm, what level is that, third
grade?
82
00:03:07,455 --> 00:03:08,121
[Chuckling]
83
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:10,758
What's up y'all?
84
00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:12,260
[All Exclaiming]
Oh!
85
00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:13,294
What's up Big Time?
86
00:03:13,327 --> 00:03:15,696
Yeah, hey man, congratulations
to the new groom.
87
00:03:15,729 --> 00:03:17,465
- Oh, right!
- Thank you.
[Clapping]
88
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:20,868
Hey man, you know what? We want
to wish you congratulations, but
I think it's more like...
89
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:22,903
time to pay our condolences.
90
00:03:22,936 --> 00:03:24,505
[Chuckling]
91
00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:26,407
Yup, yup. Tomorrow is the big
day.
92
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:28,609
So I just came in to get
tightened up, you know.
93
00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:30,944
Hey that's cool man. Well I
guess tonight is the bachelor
party.
94
00:03:30,978 --> 00:03:32,713
We goin' to the strip club?
95
00:03:32,746 --> 00:03:35,449
No man, don't nobody want no
pregnant lap dance from them
strippers you be messin' with.
96
00:03:35,483 --> 00:03:37,651
Last thing you want in your lap
dance is some baby feet.
97
00:03:37,685 --> 00:03:39,186
[Laughter]
98
00:03:39,287 --> 00:03:40,588
Hey look, it's my second
weddin',
99
00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:42,155
I got a kid already, so,
100
00:03:42,189 --> 00:03:44,892
I think I'm past my bachelor
party days.
101
00:03:44,925 --> 00:03:47,861
What the hell are you talkin'
about? The bachelor party's the
best part.
102
00:03:48,128 --> 00:03:49,697
The dummy here said something
smart.
103
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,865
The bachelor party's absolutely
the best part!
104
00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:53,334
It's the bachelor party, then
105
00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,769
the, the honeymoon, that's like
number two.
106
00:03:56,304 --> 00:03:58,872
Then, shoot, it's all downhill
after that.
107
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,041
Don't listen to these fools,
man.
108
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,811
Marriage can be a beautiful
thang. Take it from a twenty
year vet.
109
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:05,413
Yeah, agreed but,
110
00:04:05,446 --> 00:04:08,048
the bachelor party can be a
beautiful thing, man.
111
00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:09,116
When I retire...
112
00:04:09,149 --> 00:04:10,684
I'm movin' to Africa.
113
00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:11,519
Why?
114
00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:13,321
'Cause you can have multiple
wives.
115
00:04:13,321 --> 00:04:15,989
So I'm go there Africa, get me
ten
wives,
116
00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:18,191
have me ten
bachelor parties,
117
00:04:18,225 --> 00:04:19,126
understand?
118
00:04:19,159 --> 00:04:21,562
Heh, I'm gon' spend the rest of
my days...
119
00:04:21,829 --> 00:04:22,896
in The Motherland.
120
00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:24,998
[Chuckling]
121
00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:26,400
Hey, I'm with you on that.
122
00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:28,201
I got one issue.
123
00:04:28,436 --> 00:04:30,438
I haven't known her that long,
so...
124
00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:32,640
Ton', since you got twenty years
in man,
125
00:04:32,673 --> 00:04:33,974
how do you know she's the right
one?
126
00:04:34,342 --> 00:04:35,909
Awe man, I know where you
coming from brother,
127
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:37,144
I had a case of the cold feet,
128
00:04:37,177 --> 00:04:39,079
but once I saw Lisa walkin' down
that aisle...
129
00:04:39,380 --> 00:04:41,382
glanced at her daddy and he gave
me the stank eye,
130
00:04:41,415 --> 00:04:42,383
I knew it was the right thing to
do.
131
00:04:43,484 --> 00:04:44,084
Hey Eric,
132
00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:46,687
is your fiancee left handed?
133
00:04:47,655 --> 00:04:48,356
No.
134
00:04:48,356 --> 00:04:50,358
Then she's the "right" one.
135
00:04:50,391 --> 00:04:51,625
[Laughs Loudly]
136
00:04:51,659 --> 00:04:52,560
Am I right?
137
00:04:53,260 --> 00:04:54,495
Can I get some?
138
00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:56,129
You can get out of here, that's
what you can do.
139
00:04:56,464 --> 00:04:57,631
Go, go man.
140
00:04:57,865 --> 00:05:01,402
[Instrumental Music]
141
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:04,938
Wow! Wasn't that botanical
garden just beautiful?
142
00:05:05,272 --> 00:05:06,206
It was aight.
143
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:09,910
Aight? I've never seen
horticulture like that.
144
00:05:10,177 --> 00:05:12,746
Horticulture? Girl that was just
some dumb-ass flowers.
145
00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:15,616
Ew, really? You are worse than
Tony.
146
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:18,686
I can't believe he gave me the
slip just to go to the
barbershop.
147
00:05:18,986 --> 00:05:22,423
Well at last you got to spend
some quality time with your
favorite sister.
148
00:05:22,456 --> 00:05:23,391
Lori ain't here.
149
00:05:23,691 --> 00:05:25,493
[Chuckles]
150
00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:30,030
Remember we used to spend all
our time playin' spades when we
were little?
151
00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:32,099
Oh yeah, and Lori used to always
cheat?
152
00:05:32,132 --> 00:05:34,234
Yes! That's why we used
to play two-hand spades.
153
00:05:34,267 --> 00:05:36,937
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, and I used
to whup that ass.
154
00:05:36,970 --> 00:05:41,141
Uh, hold up you must be talkin'
'bout Lori, 'cause you never
whupped mine.
155
00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:43,777
Oh, I get it Lisa.
156
00:05:43,811 --> 00:05:45,446
Selective amnesia.
157
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:49,417
Please! You know damn well I was
the reigning champ.
158
00:05:49,417 --> 00:05:51,719
You mean reigning chump? Or, oh!
159
00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:53,521
Champ of the longest losing
streak.
160
00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:55,489
Oh my goodness. I remember we
had to stop
161
00:05:55,523 --> 00:05:59,593
playin' because you would always
get mad and get all sensitive
and start crying.
162
00:05:59,627 --> 00:06:02,129
Oh wait a minute, wait a minute.
First of all,
163
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:03,296
I never cried.
164
00:06:03,330 --> 00:06:05,165
You were the one that was doin'
all the crying.
165
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,567
And only crying I did
166
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:09,136
was when big mamma took a switch
to my ass for teasing you.
167
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:13,507
Well you know, uh, we can settle
this right now.
168
00:06:13,541 --> 00:06:15,175
Oh, well whatchu wanna do?
169
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:16,544
What you wanna do?
170
00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:18,479
Well break out the cards, big
mouth.
171
00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:20,714
You ain't said nothin' but a
word.
172
00:06:20,748 --> 00:06:21,849
[Chuckling]
173
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:26,219
Now sit yo five dollah ass down,
so I can make change.
174
00:06:27,488 --> 00:06:28,456
Mm.
175
00:06:31,859 --> 00:06:34,595
[Instrumental Music]
176
00:06:34,628 --> 00:06:38,666
Lisa... Lisa...
177
00:06:38,699 --> 00:06:40,568
Wake up woman!
[Lisa Groans]
178
00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:42,936
Come on now, we gon' be late if
we don't hit this road.
179
00:06:42,970 --> 00:06:44,204
We gon' miss the whole wedding.
180
00:06:44,472 --> 00:06:46,940
Come on Tony, please.
181
00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:49,042
Give me ten more minutes.
182
00:06:49,276 --> 00:06:52,580
I was up until four in the
morning playin' spades with
Rachel.
183
00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:53,847
Yeah, I heard y'all.
184
00:06:53,881 --> 00:06:55,883
It sounded like a couple hyenas
fighting over a piece of meat.
185
00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:58,919
Now where'd you put my suit? You
picked it up from the cleaners,
right?
186
00:06:59,286 --> 00:07:01,789
Urgh! I forgot.
187
00:07:01,822 --> 00:07:03,223
Damn it woman, what am I
supposed to wear?
188
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,692
I don't know. Why don't we just
not go?
189
00:07:04,725 --> 00:07:05,526
We can't not go.
190
00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:06,760
Why can't we not go?
191
00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:08,496
We can't not go 'cause I said
I'd go.
192
00:07:08,696 --> 00:07:10,397
I'd love to skip a two hour
drive to Santa Barbara,
193
00:07:10,498 --> 00:07:12,199
- but we already committed.
- No, you committed.
194
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:14,668
Okay mister? I didn't commit, I
didn't even want to go.
195
00:07:14,702 --> 00:07:16,737
Let's not forget he dumped my
cousin Patrice.
196
00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:18,038
Had to see that comin'.
197
00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:19,006
She was pregnant when they met
198
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:20,608
and she still wanted him to get
a DNA test.
199
00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:22,776
Why don't we just say something
came up,
200
00:07:22,810 --> 00:07:24,377
and that's why we couldn't make
it?
201
00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:27,180
- Oh! Ooh, ooh, Ooh-ooh!
- Hmm?
202
00:07:27,214 --> 00:07:28,081
- Better yet...
- Hmm?
203
00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:29,883
Why don't we say we did go
204
00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:30,951
when we really didn't?
205
00:07:31,719 --> 00:07:32,653
Go on.
206
00:07:32,820 --> 00:07:35,556
Yeah, I mean it's gon' be like
250 people there Tony.
207
00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:37,991
He's not gonna count every
person in the room.
208
00:07:38,025 --> 00:07:40,093
We just call and leave a
voicemail
209
00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:42,963
- say "oh, wow, what a
beautiful ceremony".
- Hmm...
210
00:07:42,996 --> 00:07:45,666
"Beautiful". And then he's gonna
assume we were there.
211
00:07:45,699 --> 00:07:47,267
You know what, that's not a bad
idea.
212
00:07:47,568 --> 00:07:48,902
Yeah, I remember when we got
married,
213
00:07:49,436 --> 00:07:52,673
I, I got pulled in so many
different directions, I don't
even remember our wedding day.
214
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:55,709
Re- I mean, I remember it.
215
00:07:55,743 --> 00:07:56,944
Remem- I'm just sayin', aye...
216
00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,746
Woo! Beautiful day. Sun was
shining-
217
00:07:58,779 --> 00:07:59,747
It was raining.
218
00:07:59,780 --> 00:08:01,882
Yeah, yeah, but you were the pot
of gold
219
00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:04,417
at the end of that rainbow.
[Chuckles]
You were.
220
00:08:04,451 --> 00:08:05,285
You looked so...
221
00:08:07,054 --> 00:08:13,561
[Instrumental Music]
222
00:08:13,561 --> 00:08:14,427
Hey.
223
00:08:14,461 --> 00:08:15,963
Aren't you supped to be at some
wedding?
224
00:08:16,229 --> 00:08:18,632
Change of plans. What are you
doing?
225
00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:20,901
What does it look like I'm
doing? I'm enjoying the
226
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:23,203
Stallworth day spa.
227
00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:26,574
Ah! You guys really need to take
advantage of your own amenities.
228
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:29,209
oh, and could you, ah,
up your wine selection?
229
00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:30,310
This is flat.
230
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,580
It wasn't flat when you was
drinking it last night.
231
00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:34,915
I wasn't the only one drinking.
232
00:08:34,948 --> 00:08:35,949
It's my house.
233
00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:39,152
Oh, okay, I get it, I get it.
234
00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:40,954
You're still pouting,
235
00:08:40,988 --> 00:08:43,390
because of that beat down you
took last night.
236
00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:47,360
Well uh, don't worry. I will
give you
a chance to redeem yourself
237
00:08:47,394 --> 00:08:48,662
with a rematch later.
238
00:08:48,696 --> 00:08:51,298
Why wait 'til later when we can
get it on right now?
239
00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:54,501
Oh, okay, Fo sho'. Just pay me
the hundred bucks you owe me.
240
00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:58,138
It was not a hundred bucks
Rachel, it was fifty.
241
00:08:58,405 --> 00:09:00,708
Yeah, and then I
beat you, twice.
242
00:09:00,741 --> 00:09:02,676
So you do the math.
243
00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:06,513
Awk, that's right! You were
never any
good at math!
244
00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:09,983
Another thing that I'm better at
than you.
245
00:09:10,017 --> 00:09:13,120
Oh pease! You weren't better
than me at volleyball,
246
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:14,688
never better than me at
swimming, and you
247
00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:17,490
definitely weren't better than
me at jumping rope, so.
248
00:09:17,825 --> 00:09:19,927
Girl, I will jump out of this
jacuzzi,
249
00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,995
and double dutch yo' thick ass
into submission.
250
00:09:22,029 --> 00:09:23,664
Bring it on,
thunder thighs.
251
00:09:24,364 --> 00:09:25,766
Okay fine, just pay me first.
252
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:28,702
You really trying to get a
hundred bucks out of me.
253
00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:29,903
A bet's a bet.
254
00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:33,540
[Instrumental Music]
255
00:09:33,641 --> 00:09:34,374
[Lisa] Ooh man...
256
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,376
Can't stand my sister.
257
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,145
I'm really starting to think she
was adopted.
258
00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:40,547
Mm. Baby, it's been confirmed,
she's a whole other species.
259
00:09:40,648 --> 00:09:41,815
Want me to kick her out?
260
00:09:41,849 --> 00:09:45,252
Baby, we can't. She's getting
her place fumigated, remember?
261
00:09:45,518 --> 00:09:46,987
I'm just offering solutions
Lisa.
262
00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:50,190
And here's another one. If
Rachel's acting up, just take
her for a walk.
263
00:09:50,658 --> 00:09:52,993
I don't even know
why I come to you for
suggestions.
264
00:09:53,026 --> 00:09:53,861
Did you call yet?
265
00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:56,096
I, I got this, I got this.
266
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:57,698
The way I see it, they're
probably half way through the
ceremony,
267
00:09:57,731 --> 00:09:58,666
so its the perfect time now.
268
00:09:59,232 --> 00:10:01,268
- Alight.
- Wait, wh, what should I say?
269
00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:03,503
You got this, remember?
270
00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:04,471
Can you help a brother out?
271
00:10:04,772 --> 00:10:07,107
Uh, keep it simple! Just keep it
simple, uh...
272
00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:09,142
beautiful ceremony, sorry we had
to run early.
273
00:10:09,176 --> 00:10:11,244
Alright. Why did we
leave early?
274
00:10:11,845 --> 00:10:14,547
Okay, I don't know, say you- oh
yeah, you had the bubble guts,
275
00:10:14,581 --> 00:10:15,849
didn't want to mess up your
suit.
276
00:10:15,883 --> 00:10:17,651
I ain't finna tell him, I had
the
bubble guts!
277
00:10:17,685 --> 00:10:19,853
look, how 'bout I tell him that
your
dress was too tight,
278
00:10:19,887 --> 00:10:20,921
and it was cutting off your
circulation?
279
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:22,189
I think you should stop right
there.
280
00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:24,624
Okay, your heels were too small
and your dogs were barkin'?
281
00:10:24,925 --> 00:10:26,827
Yeah, use that one, that's fine.
Just call.
282
00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:29,196
[Dialing]
[Phone ringing]
[Message tone]
283
00:10:29,229 --> 00:10:30,898
Oh, hey what's up Big Time!
284
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:33,533
Listen, it's Tony, man. Uh, Lisa
and I had to cut out early.
285
00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:35,435
Congratulations, once again man.
286
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:37,437
Uh, Lisa had to, you know her
dress was, uh,
287
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,639
I mean, um, her shoes uh,
288
00:10:39,673 --> 00:10:41,174
- Lisa had the bubble guts.
- What?
289
00:10:41,208 --> 00:10:44,712
Uh, alright man, so enjoy your
honeymoon. Hit me, when you get
back, peace.
290
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:46,880
Why would you say I had the
bubble guts?
291
00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:47,981
Cause you put it in my
head!
292
00:10:48,015 --> 00:10:49,016
You know I'm a terrible liar!
293
00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:49,750
Clearly!
294
00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:54,487
Uh, Donnie, how the hell'd you
get in here?
295
00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,924
From that secret key y'all keep
under the rock.
296
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:58,158
I don't miss nothin'.
297
00:10:58,191 --> 00:10:59,326
Now what the hell do you want?
298
00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:01,729
Yeah. Aren't you supposed to be
at the reception?
299
00:11:01,729 --> 00:11:02,796
Y'all missed it!
300
00:11:03,196 --> 00:11:04,331
Why, what happened?
301
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:07,167
Psst, wadn't a reception, 'cause
it
wadn't no wedding!
302
00:11:07,735 --> 00:11:09,737
Hah! Dude left her at the altar.
303
00:11:10,738 --> 00:11:13,106
It's a shame, 'cause she had
some badass bridesmaids.
304
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,775
[Both] Ah, damn!
305
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:17,610
[Instrumental Music]
306
00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:23,516
[Instrumental Music]
307
00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:24,551
Wait, he just left her there?
308
00:11:24,584 --> 00:11:26,153
- I told you he wa-
- Shh! Let the man finish.
309
00:11:26,553 --> 00:11:29,189
Yeah man, so before that "Here
Comes The Bride" music came on,
310
00:11:29,222 --> 00:11:30,758
he took off!
311
00:11:30,758 --> 00:11:33,493
I'm talkin' 'bout he knocked his
grandmother over, on his way out
the church!
312
00:11:33,761 --> 00:11:36,529
Man her wig flew off and
everything. It was crazy!
313
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:39,232
Oh my gosh, she must be
devastated.
314
00:11:39,266 --> 00:11:41,334
Hell yeah! The whole church seen
them bald spots.
315
00:11:41,568 --> 00:11:43,603
I'm talkin' 'bout the bride,
fool!
316
00:11:43,636 --> 00:11:45,238
Oh yeah, she was cryin' hard,
too.
317
00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:46,639
One of those soulful cries, one
of those
318
00:11:46,673 --> 00:11:48,208
[Imitates Sobbing]
319
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:50,778
"He said he loved me!"
320
00:11:51,244 --> 00:11:53,513
"I'm gon' die alone!"
321
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:55,382
Y'all picked the right wedding
to skip man.
322
00:11:55,415 --> 00:11:57,918
At least now he can't be mad at
y'all for missing the wedding.
323
00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:01,554
Yeah, about that, we got a
bigger problem.
324
00:12:01,789 --> 00:12:05,893
Yeah, tony left him a voicemail
saying we really enjoyed the
wedding.
325
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:08,228
Oh, Tony left? Really? Really? I
thought we was a team!
326
00:12:08,461 --> 00:12:09,496
You did?
327
00:12:09,529 --> 00:12:11,899
Y'all left that man a voicemail
about the wedding?
328
00:12:11,932 --> 00:12:13,533
he gon' think y'all were
clownin' him.
329
00:12:13,801 --> 00:12:15,535
Shame on y'all, man!
330
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,805
Y'all are parents. You supposed
to be settin' an example.
331
00:12:17,838 --> 00:12:19,339
Over here missing weddings and
lying.
332
00:12:19,372 --> 00:12:22,509
That's what you gon' teach Devin
and them? Pssh!
333
00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:23,343
Are you gon' drink that?
334
00:12:23,811 --> 00:12:32,252
[Instrumental Music]
335
00:12:32,285 --> 00:12:35,288
Uh, now see, okay, that right,
that whoa!
336
00:12:35,322 --> 00:12:37,557
Whoop-whoo! That's how you jump
rope, girl.
337
00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:38,391
Yeah! You was skippin-
338
00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:40,593
[Inaudible] C walk on 'em.
339
00:12:40,627 --> 00:12:41,628
C walk on 'em.
340
00:12:41,661 --> 00:12:43,430
You saw that little girls face?
She was like.
341
00:12:43,831 --> 00:12:45,966
I have never seen anybody
jump like that.
342
00:12:45,999 --> 00:12:48,735
And I've been to a lot of horror
movies with a lot of black
folks.
343
00:12:48,836 --> 00:12:50,838
[Gasps] Don't go in there!
[Gasps] He's right behind you!
344
00:12:50,838 --> 00:12:53,540
[Gasps] Oh! Don't look that way!
[Laughing]
345
00:12:54,141 --> 00:12:57,277
Yeah, yeah, you weren't so, you
were not so bad yourself,
honestly.
346
00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:59,746
Yeah, them little girls,
they gonna think twice before
347
00:12:59,847 --> 00:13:01,849
skipping rope in
our neighborhood.
348
00:13:01,849 --> 00:13:03,450
-Hear me?
-Amen to that!
349
00:13:03,483 --> 00:13:05,018
Now we're even.
350
00:13:05,052 --> 00:13:06,619
Wait, what do you mean even?
351
00:13:06,653 --> 00:13:10,057
Uh, you won at spades, I won at
jump rope.
352
00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:11,191
Do the math. Even.
353
00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:12,893
Wait, wait, wait, no.
354
00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:15,195
I remember having a bet for
playing spades.
355
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:16,864
Uh, yeah, and?
356
00:13:16,864 --> 00:13:19,566
And uh, I don't remember doing a
bet for jumping rope.
357
00:13:19,599 --> 00:13:21,334
Well it was, it was implied.
358
00:13:21,601 --> 00:13:23,003
How was it implied?
359
00:13:23,036 --> 00:13:26,206
We started talking about jumping
rope right after the spades
thing.
360
00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:28,641
[Huffs] You are so petty!
361
00:13:28,942 --> 00:13:30,010
I'm petty?
362
00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:32,079
- Really? Okay, you
know what?
- Yes, yes!
363
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:35,315
I'll get your little cheap ass
the one hundred dollars, okay?
364
00:13:35,348 --> 00:13:37,885
No, no, no, no! You do not get
to call me cheap, okay?
365
00:13:37,885 --> 00:13:39,452
I won this money fair and
square.
366
00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:42,055
Oh, so now you don't want me to
pay because you want to be the
bigger person?
367
00:13:42,089 --> 00:13:45,358
Don't you? And you're gonna hold
this over my head for the rest
of my life.
368
00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:47,660
Oh my G- you are so, so...
369
00:13:48,095 --> 00:13:50,130
So what? So what? So right?
370
00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:52,900
You know what? There's only one
way to settle this. Once and for
all.
371
00:13:53,133 --> 00:13:56,236
Oh you ain't even got to say it.
I'll get the cards.
372
00:13:56,469 --> 00:14:02,742
[Instrumental Music]
373
00:14:02,775 --> 00:14:04,644
[Yawning]
374
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,080
Mmm, we out of damn coffee.
375
00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:08,481
We been playin' all night.
376
00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:10,517
Can you just concede?
377
00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:12,752
Hell no! You might've won the
first
fifteen,
378
00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:15,122
but I'm about to win the next
sixteen.
379
00:14:15,155 --> 00:14:17,357
Lisa, I'm sleepy.
380
00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:19,092
Oh well you know what? Let me
put on another
381
00:14:19,126 --> 00:14:21,694
pot of coffee, because you're
about to wake it on up!
382
00:14:21,728 --> 00:14:25,132
Um mm, come, come, come back,
sit down sit down, coffee ain't
gonna help.
383
00:14:25,933 --> 00:14:28,401
I'm so tired, but I'm gon'
tell you something.
384
00:14:31,338 --> 00:14:33,206
You're holding a King of Hearts,
385
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:34,975
and a two of Diamonds.
386
00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:40,313
Okay, well, what about now?
387
00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:44,317
Ten of Spades, Six of Clubs.
388
00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:45,152
Oh my God...
389
00:14:45,785 --> 00:14:47,687
you have a gift, Rachel!
390
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:49,789
-Uh-huh.
-Unless you been counting cards.
391
00:14:49,822 --> 00:14:51,558
Mm-mm. I just been lookin' at
the
392
00:14:51,591 --> 00:14:53,360
reflection of the cards in them
thick-ass
393
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:55,395
Catwoman, trifocals you got
on your face.
394
00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:00,600
You little heifer!
395
00:15:00,633 --> 00:15:02,569
-Yeah, whatever.
-Really?
396
00:15:02,602 --> 00:15:05,038
Call me what you want.
But the good news is,
397
00:15:05,072 --> 00:15:06,639
you don't owe me money anymore.
398
00:15:06,673 --> 00:15:08,976
And now, I get to get some
sleep.
399
00:15:08,976 --> 00:15:11,979
Oh no, oh no, we are going to
play
again.
400
00:15:11,979 --> 00:15:12,812
-Okay.
-Umm-mm.
401
00:15:12,845 --> 00:15:14,447
-Without my readers!
-Umm mm
402
00:15:14,481 --> 00:15:17,117
-Rach, Rachel, Rachel!
-What
403
00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:19,086
Get back here, no we're playin'
again.
404
00:15:19,119 --> 00:15:21,989
Sit it down, sit it right on
down.
405
00:15:21,989 --> 00:15:24,424
-I can not believe this, wasting
my time.
-Fine.
406
00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:25,692
-Fine.
-Cheatin' all night.
407
00:15:25,725 --> 00:15:27,727
Sucka, you know I ain't gonna
play that game no more.
408
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:28,495
Rachel!
409
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,364
[Instrumental music]
410
00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:33,100
[Door bell]
411
00:15:35,002 --> 00:15:35,735
Eric.
412
00:15:36,036 --> 00:15:38,171
- Hey Ton', can I come in?
- Yeah, of course.
413
00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:40,540
You alright?
414
00:15:41,008 --> 00:15:43,143
Yeah man, I'm alright. Just...
415
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:45,845
been up all night drivin'
around and thinking.
416
00:15:46,213 --> 00:15:47,180
Yeah, I bet.
417
00:15:47,214 --> 00:15:49,316
- Listen, about last night-
- No, here you go.
418
00:15:49,349 --> 00:15:50,517
Take your present back.
419
00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:52,019
My present?
420
00:15:52,052 --> 00:15:53,553
Yeah, the one you bought to the
wedding.
421
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,823
I returned all the presents, and
this was the only one that
didn't have a card on it,
422
00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:58,258
so I knew it came from you and
Lisa.
423
00:15:59,559 --> 00:16:02,629
Oh, because y'all were at the
wedding.
424
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:04,631
Or lack thereof.
425
00:16:04,864 --> 00:16:06,899
Oh yeah, yeah, we- we were
there, we were there.
426
00:16:06,933 --> 00:16:08,635
Uh, hey, look I'm, I'm sorry
about what happened.
427
00:16:09,069 --> 00:16:11,071
Oh and I'm sorry I missed your
call yesterday.
428
00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:13,040
I know you just wanted to talk
some sense into me.
429
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:14,574
I still haven't heard the
voicemail you left.
430
00:16:15,108 --> 00:16:16,309
Well you can just delete that.
[Chuckles]
431
00:16:16,343 --> 00:16:19,612
Yeah, don't, don't even listen
to it brother. You here now, we
can talk it out.
432
00:16:20,613 --> 00:16:21,448
So...
433
00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:25,052
you know you're the only reason
that I left the church, right?
434
00:16:25,252 --> 00:16:25,852
Mm!
435
00:16:26,919 --> 00:16:30,290
Uh, this ain't one of them
comin' out of the closet
moments, is it?
436
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:31,524
'Cause I don't get down like
that, brah.
437
00:16:32,092 --> 00:16:34,927
Naw man, I took your advice.
438
00:16:34,961 --> 00:16:36,896
When I saw her walkin' down the
aisle...
439
00:16:37,364 --> 00:16:38,598
I just knew she wasn't for me.
440
00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:41,168
Oh, he, hey man, don't
put that on me.
441
00:16:41,201 --> 00:16:42,902
Home wrecker.
442
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:45,105
Donnie, Ton's right.
443
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:47,407
When I saw her walkin' down that
aisle,
444
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:49,276
those two words just popped up
in my head.
445
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:52,379
- I do?
- Nah, I'm out.
446
00:16:52,645 --> 00:16:55,082
"Naw, I'm out"? That's three
words.
447
00:16:55,115 --> 00:16:56,916
- Will you shut up?
- It's three words!
448
00:16:57,717 --> 00:16:59,352
Look man, I'm sorry it didn't
work out.
449
00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:00,820
Yeah, well...
450
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:01,821
Hey!
451
00:17:02,089 --> 00:17:05,558
I ain't gettin' no cell phone
reception in here, man.
452
00:17:05,892 --> 00:17:07,660
Um, how 'bout you, Eric?
453
00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:10,530
Uh, full bars.
454
00:17:10,563 --> 00:17:11,731
Would you mind
455
00:17:11,764 --> 00:17:15,802
if I used your phone? I have an
important business call.
456
00:17:16,103 --> 00:17:18,471
No problem. I was gonna use the
bathroom anyway. Is that cool?
457
00:17:18,505 --> 00:17:19,506
Yeah, yeah, right down the hall.
458
00:17:22,442 --> 00:17:23,643
You're welcome Ton'.
459
00:17:23,676 --> 00:17:26,479
Now all I got to do is get in
the phone and delete the
voicemail before he get back.
460
00:17:26,513 --> 00:17:27,847
[Laughing]
That's a great plan!
461
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:28,415
I know.
462
00:17:28,448 --> 00:17:29,182
Get in there.
463
00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:30,983
Oh man, it's locked.
464
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:33,886
Boy that was quick.
465
00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:36,356
I just had to wash my hands.
466
00:17:36,656 --> 00:17:40,293
Aww, wa, you, you don't
wanna go do nothin' else?
467
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:41,928
I'm good.
468
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:44,864
You know what's funny?
469
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:47,934
How some people put passcodes on
they phones
470
00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:49,802
like they tryin' to keep a
government secret or something.
471
00:17:49,836 --> 00:17:52,139
Yeah I guess. I got a password
on mine.
472
00:17:53,039 --> 00:17:55,842
Really? I hope it's something
secure. Most people just put
they birthday.
473
00:17:55,875 --> 00:17:58,010
[Donnie Giggles]
Well actually, it's my
daughter's birthday.
474
00:17:58,311 --> 00:17:59,779
And she got that spring
birthday, right?
475
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:01,681
October.
476
00:18:02,215 --> 00:18:03,550
Ah, October, October.
477
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:05,218
Okay, ten.
478
00:18:05,252 --> 00:18:07,154
- Uh, October 17th?
- 25th.
479
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:08,155
25th?
480
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,657
10 25.
481
00:18:10,890 --> 00:18:11,724
What was that?
482
00:18:13,025 --> 00:18:16,329
I said I gotta get the time.
483
00:18:16,363 --> 00:18:16,863
Mm.
484
00:18:16,896 --> 00:18:19,332
Say Ton', I really could use a
drink right now,
485
00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:21,168
so, could we talk this whole
thing through?
486
00:18:21,168 --> 00:18:21,701
Sure.
487
00:18:21,734 --> 00:18:22,735
Uh, I'll get it!
488
00:18:23,002 --> 00:18:23,770
[Chuckles]
489
00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:27,174
[Tony's Voice] "Oh, hey what's
up Big Time, Listen it's Tony,
man uh,
490
00:18:27,174 --> 00:18:30,643
uh, Lisa and I had to cut out
early. Congratulations once
again, man.
491
00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:32,712
Ah, Lisa had to, you know, her
dress was ah,
492
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:36,383
her shoes,uh, Lisa had the
bubble guts.
493
00:18:36,416 --> 00:18:39,986
Uh, alright man, so, uh enjoy
your Honeymoon. Hit me when you
get back, peace.
494
00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:42,755
Here your phone back.
495
00:18:44,691 --> 00:18:46,559
-Did I hear that right?
-Hmm?
496
00:18:46,593 --> 00:18:49,529
Did you leave a message saying
that the ceremony was beautiful?
497
00:18:49,562 --> 00:18:50,563
Let me explain...
498
00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:52,865
No, no. Did you even go? You
didn't even go, did you?
499
00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:54,934
Well, to be fair, you
didn't go either.
500
00:18:55,402 --> 00:18:57,069
Uh, well you were there, but you
left early.
501
00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:58,705
Okay, uh, let me explain.
502
00:18:58,738 --> 00:19:01,541
Nah, you know what? You
explained in your voicemail.
503
00:19:02,309 --> 00:19:04,577
- Peace.
- Pea- Eric.
504
00:19:04,911 --> 00:19:07,514
Eric! Come on brother. 'Ey, 'ey!
505
00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:09,949
Lisa had the bubble guts!
506
00:19:15,222 --> 00:19:22,595
[Instrumental music]
507
00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:24,631
Damn boy, what they call you on
the streets, Brillo?
508
00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:26,599
[Laughing]
509
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:28,100
I'll give you my best, man.
510
00:19:28,134 --> 00:19:29,068
Hey, what's up y'all?
511
00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:30,870
Hey, how you holdin' up, young
fella?
512
00:19:31,238 --> 00:19:34,741
I'm alright. I just came by to
return your, uh gift.
513
00:19:34,774 --> 00:19:36,976
A ten dollar gift card, very
thoughtful of you.
514
00:19:37,244 --> 00:19:38,878
Hey man, the least I could do,
you know.
515
00:19:38,911 --> 00:19:40,280
Hey, that's actually from both
of us,
516
00:19:40,313 --> 00:19:41,948
so I'm just gonna go head and
keep it at my crib.
517
00:19:44,551 --> 00:19:46,253
Hey Eric, we should talk, man.
518
00:19:46,286 --> 00:19:47,620
Ah, nah, Ton'. We're good.
519
00:19:47,954 --> 00:19:48,588
We are?
520
00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:50,257
Yeah, so what you missed my
wedding?
521
00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:51,558
I missed my wedding too.
522
00:19:51,591 --> 00:19:53,293
[Laughing]
523
00:19:53,326 --> 00:19:56,062
My, man. So uh, everything's
good with
you man?
524
00:19:56,663 --> 00:20:00,066
Well, I talked to her this
morning, and obviously she was
upset.
525
00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:02,502
But, we both agreed it,
you know, it was for the best.
526
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:05,272
-Deep down, we knew it wasn't
right.
-Mmm hmm.
527
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:07,139
I'ma tell you where you went
wrong.
528
00:20:08,107 --> 00:20:09,309
The bachelor party!
529
00:20:09,642 --> 00:20:11,644
Yeah, but we didn't have a
bachelor party.
530
00:20:11,678 --> 00:20:13,313
Exactly. You jinxed it.
531
00:20:13,813 --> 00:20:15,948
Only one way to fix this now.
532
00:20:16,383 --> 00:20:17,484
And what is that?
533
00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:19,452
[All] Strip club!
534
00:20:19,486 --> 00:20:21,020
[Instrumental Music]
40847
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