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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:17,001 --> 00:01:21,000 You must be joking. 2 00:01:21,001 --> 00:01:23,000 No. Why? 3 00:01:23,001 --> 00:01:26,000 Is it me or do those trees have a certain phallic quality? 4 00:01:26,001 --> 00:01:27,859 It's you, okay? It's always you. You 5 00:01:27,871 --> 00:01:30,000 always have a problem with the cover art. 6 00:01:30,001 --> 00:01:32,676 Oh, please, look at them. This isn't Forest 7 00:01:32,688 --> 00:01:35,000 of Romance. This is Forest of D icks. 8 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:40,000 They're crazy. What are you talking about? They're just trees, you know? 9 00:01:40,001 --> 00:01:42,000 They're just big, erect, throbbing trees. 10 00:01:42,001 --> 00:01:45,000 I'll get the art department to tone it down a bit. 11 00:01:45,001 --> 00:01:46,000 Thank you. 12 00:01:46,001 --> 00:01:49,000 How about the back cover? 13 00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:52,000 No, forget it. I'm not having a photo. Not after last time. 14 00:01:52,001 --> 00:01:54,000 Come on. I mean, it wasn't that bad. 15 00:01:54,001 --> 00:01:58,000 Okay, maybe the lighting was a little harsh, but I've got someone new. You 16 00:01:58,001 --> 00:02:00,000 know what? She's really, really great. 17 00:02:00,001 --> 00:02:02,000 Fine. Fine. 18 00:02:02,001 --> 00:02:04,000 Okay. Okay. I'll see you Friday. 19 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:09,000 I was thinking, if you haven't got Jeremy tonight, maybe you'd like to join 20 00:02:09,001 --> 00:02:10,000 me for dinner. 21 00:02:10,001 --> 00:02:11,000 Dinner? 22 00:02:11,001 --> 00:02:12,000 I must have caught her eye. 23 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:14,000 Sure. 24 00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:17,000 My place? Seven-ish? 25 00:02:17,001 --> 00:02:18,000 Your place? 26 00:02:18,001 --> 00:02:20,306 There's nothing like wearing something 27 00:02:20,318 --> 00:02:23,000 comfortable and turning the lights down low. 28 00:02:23,001 --> 00:02:25,000 Sounds great. 29 00:02:25,001 --> 00:02:29,000 Ta. 30 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:37,000 I got a look at your itinerary for the tour. You know, 16 cities in 14 days. 31 00:02:37,001 --> 00:02:39,000 I mean, all you have to do is change the laws. 32 00:02:39,001 --> 00:02:41,000 Listen, you should be fine. 33 00:02:41,001 --> 00:02:43,000 Can we not talk about work tonight? 34 00:02:43,001 --> 00:02:47,000 I can think of much better things than making smart talk. 35 00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:49,000 Okay. 36 00:02:49,001 --> 00:02:56,000 There's something I've been wanting to talk to you about. 37 00:02:56,001 --> 00:02:59,000 No, wait. Forget it. It's a bad idea. I don't want to fuck up our working 38 00:02:59,001 --> 00:03:00,000 relationship. 39 00:03:00,001 --> 00:03:04,000 No, no, no, no. Go ahead. Go ahead. Come on. Just fuck it up. 40 00:03:04,001 --> 00:03:08,000 I don't know how to say this. 41 00:03:08,001 --> 00:03:12,000 So, I'll be blunt. 42 00:03:12,001 --> 00:03:14,000 Be blunt. Blunt is good. 43 00:03:14,001 --> 00:03:15,000 Martin. 44 00:03:15,001 --> 00:03:17,000 Kiss me? 45 00:03:17,001 --> 00:03:18,000 I want your sperm. 46 00:03:18,001 --> 00:03:24,000 You know, I've never heard it put quite that way before. 47 00:03:24,001 --> 00:03:29,000 I can't say it hasn't crossed my mind, you know, many, many, many times. 48 00:03:29,001 --> 00:03:32,000 Ever since the first day we met, you know, I felt a bond. 49 00:03:32,001 --> 00:03:34,000 No, no. All I want is your sperm. 50 00:03:34,001 --> 00:03:36,000 What kind of a gag is this? 51 00:03:36,001 --> 00:03:37,000 Excuse me? 52 00:03:37,001 --> 00:03:39,000 I want to have a baby. 53 00:03:39,001 --> 00:03:40,000 A baby? 54 00:03:40,001 --> 00:03:44,000 I've been thinking about it a lot with this whole turning 40 business. 55 00:03:44,001 --> 00:03:51,000 And since it's kind of tough to conceive on your own, I'd like you to help. 56 00:03:51,001 --> 00:03:56,000 Ellen, this is huge. I mean, I don't know what to say. 57 00:03:56,001 --> 00:03:57,430 Well, of all the men I know, you have 58 00:03:57,442 --> 00:03:59,000 the most qualities I'd want in my child. 59 00:03:59,001 --> 00:04:02,000 Thank you. Thank you. That's very nice. 60 00:04:02,001 --> 00:04:05,000 You're smart, attractive, funny. 61 00:04:05,001 --> 00:04:07,000 No, I mean, I'm very flattered. 62 00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:10,000 Plus, I have no feelings for you romantically. 63 00:04:10,001 --> 00:04:15,000 Right. 64 00:04:15,001 --> 00:04:18,000 It's less complicated like that. You'd have no responsibilities at all. 65 00:04:18,001 --> 00:04:22,000 It would be my child. You'd just be... The sperm guy? 66 00:04:22,001 --> 00:04:26,000 In essence, but you'd be giving me an incredible gift. 67 00:04:26,001 --> 00:04:28,000 And you wouldn't have to wrap it. 68 00:04:28,001 --> 00:04:30,000 I don't know. 69 00:04:30,001 --> 00:04:32,000 Will you think about it? 70 00:04:32,001 --> 00:04:36,000 Be fruitful and multiply. 71 00:04:36,001 --> 00:04:40,000 Create a race, a man-made race upon the face of the Earth. 72 00:04:40,001 --> 00:04:42,000 Why not? 73 00:04:42,001 --> 00:04:44,000 I'll think about it. 74 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:52,000 A cereal box, huh? I thought they only put athletes on these. 75 00:04:52,001 --> 00:04:55,000 Until now. Isn't it exciting? 76 00:04:55,001 --> 00:04:58,000 Richard told me it meant more to him than winning the Nobel Prize. 77 00:04:58,001 --> 00:05:04,000 Yeah, well, I usually skip breakfast myself. 78 00:05:04,001 --> 00:05:08,000 Anyway, look, I want to ask you a question. 79 00:05:08,001 --> 00:05:10,989 How do you feel about a 40-year-old woman 80 00:05:11,001 --> 00:05:14,000 choosing to have a child just on her own? 81 00:05:14,001 --> 00:05:18,000 Well, speaking as a psychologist and as a mother, 82 00:05:18,001 --> 00:05:19,839 I'd have to say if she is emotionally 83 00:05:19,851 --> 00:05:22,000 and infincially capable of raising a child, 84 00:05:22,001 --> 00:05:24,000 then I would fully support her decision. 85 00:05:24,001 --> 00:05:28,000 Good, good. Because one of my writers asked me, and... 86 00:05:28,001 --> 00:05:31,000 I think I'm gonna give her my sperm. 87 00:05:31,001 --> 00:05:34,000 Your sperm? Are you out of your mind? 88 00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:36,000 Could you keep your voice down, please? 89 00:05:36,001 --> 00:05:38,000 This isn't something the whole office has to know. 90 00:05:38,001 --> 00:05:40,000 So you're gonna give some woman your sperm. 91 00:05:40,001 --> 00:05:42,000 You just said you thought it was a good idea. 92 00:05:42,001 --> 00:05:44,232 Well, that was a hypothetical woman 93 00:05:44,244 --> 00:05:47,000 with some... Hypothetical sperm, not yours. 94 00:05:47,001 --> 00:05:49,000 Are you jealous? 95 00:05:49,001 --> 00:05:50,000 You're jealous? 96 00:05:50,001 --> 00:05:52,000 No, no, no. 97 00:05:52,001 --> 00:05:55,000 Well, maybe just a little. 98 00:05:55,001 --> 00:06:01,000 I mean, up until now, I'm the only one who ever got your sperm... to keep. 99 00:06:01,001 --> 00:06:03,000 And now some strange woman comes and asks for it, 100 00:06:03,001 --> 00:06:06,000 and you're just giving it out like Johnny Appleseed. 101 00:06:06,001 --> 00:06:09,000 First of all, this is not a stranger. I've known her for ten years. 102 00:06:09,001 --> 00:06:11,000 Well, I've known my dry cleaner for ten years, 103 00:06:11,001 --> 00:06:13,000 but I'm not about to have a child with him. 104 00:06:13,001 --> 00:06:16,000 This is not my dry cleaner. This is someone I care about. 105 00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:18,000 Jesus Christ, I gave Richard a kidney. 106 00:06:18,001 --> 00:06:20,000 I mean, this'll be a lot easier, believe me. 107 00:06:20,001 --> 00:06:21,000 But Martin, a child? 108 00:06:21,001 --> 00:06:24,000 I am not having a child. She's having a child. 109 00:06:24,001 --> 00:06:28,000 Okay? I'm just the... the sperm guy. 110 00:06:28,001 --> 00:06:31,000 Here's your coffee. 111 00:06:31,001 --> 00:06:32,000 Get out! 112 00:06:32,001 --> 00:06:33,000 I didn't ask for coffee. 113 00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:34,000 Maybe not. 114 00:06:34,001 --> 00:06:39,000 But I'd just like to put in my two cents about the sperm guy thing. 115 00:06:39,001 --> 00:06:42,000 You really ought to do something about that intercom. 116 00:06:42,001 --> 00:06:43,000 Thank you. 117 00:06:43,001 --> 00:06:45,000 You know, I'd be careful if I were you. 118 00:06:45,001 --> 00:06:46,941 Miss Ellen might turn out to be like that 119 00:06:46,953 --> 00:06:49,000 Mary Beth Whitehead person in the TV movie. 120 00:06:49,001 --> 00:06:51,000 She could develop some kind of bond with the baby. 121 00:06:51,001 --> 00:06:53,000 Before you know it, she wouldn't want to give it up. 122 00:06:53,001 --> 00:06:55,000 She'd be saying it's her baby. 123 00:06:55,001 --> 00:06:57,000 It is her baby. She intends to keep it. 124 00:06:57,001 --> 00:06:58,000 You see what I mean? 125 00:06:58,001 --> 00:07:00,000 You better get yourself a lawyer. 126 00:07:00,001 --> 00:07:01,000 And fast. 127 00:07:01,001 --> 00:07:13,000 Oh, hi. 128 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,000 I'll do it. 129 00:07:15,001 --> 00:07:16,000 You'll do it? 130 00:07:16,001 --> 00:07:18,000 As in, you'll do it. 131 00:07:18,001 --> 00:07:19,000 I'll do it. 132 00:07:19,001 --> 00:07:23,000 Oh, my God. My God. Thank you. 133 00:07:23,001 --> 00:07:25,000 This is gonna be kind of weird, huh? 134 00:07:25,001 --> 00:07:27,000 Seeing each other naked. 135 00:07:27,001 --> 00:07:30,000 We're not gonna be making love. 136 00:07:30,001 --> 00:07:32,000 You're going to the sperm bank. 137 00:07:32,001 --> 00:07:36,000 Well, that's kicking cupid right in the pants. 138 00:07:36,001 --> 00:07:40,000 Right. Right, right. That's what I meant. 139 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:45,000 I think I'll go downtown in the morning and open an account. 140 00:07:45,001 --> 00:08:07,000 Banks are always prouder when you're in a hurry, aren't they? 141 00:08:07,001 --> 00:08:08,001 Yeah. 142 00:08:11,001 --> 00:08:18,000 Are you a virgin? 143 00:08:18,001 --> 00:08:19,000 Excuse me? 144 00:08:19,001 --> 00:08:21,000 First time, isn't it? 145 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:23,000 Making a deposit. 146 00:08:23,001 --> 00:08:24,000 How could you tell? 147 00:08:24,001 --> 00:08:26,000 Well, I've never seen you around here before. 148 00:08:26,001 --> 00:08:28,000 I'm sort of a regular myself. 149 00:08:28,001 --> 00:08:32,000 That's nice. 150 00:08:32,001 --> 00:08:33,000 Oh, best deal in town. 151 00:08:33,001 --> 00:08:35,000 Where else can you get paid 45 bucks 152 00:08:35,001 --> 00:08:37,000 for doing exactly what you'd be doing at home anyway? 153 00:08:37,001 --> 00:08:38,000 Am I right? 154 00:08:38,001 --> 00:08:40,000 Mr. Tupper. 155 00:08:40,001 --> 00:08:41,000 Right here. 156 00:08:41,001 --> 00:08:46,000 Sorry. 157 00:08:46,001 --> 00:08:49,000 Take this cup, fill it, and bring it to me when you're done. 158 00:08:49,001 --> 00:08:51,000 Fill it? 159 00:08:51,001 --> 00:08:52,000 Well, do the best you can. 160 00:08:52,001 --> 00:08:54,000 Cubicle number one on the left. 161 00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:57,000 Ask for cubicle number two. It's carpeted. 162 00:08:57,001 --> 00:09:00,000 Uh, how do I do this exactly? 163 00:09:00,001 --> 00:09:02,000 I mean, do I just go in there and... 164 00:09:02,001 --> 00:09:05,000 Masturbate. You do know how to do that, don't you? 165 00:09:05,001 --> 00:09:06,914 You palm it in the sand. That means you 166 00:09:06,926 --> 00:09:09,000 grip it in the palm of the hand like this. 167 00:09:09,001 --> 00:09:10,000 This takes a good deal of practice. 168 00:09:10,001 --> 00:09:13,065 What I meant was... Do you have anything 169 00:09:13,077 --> 00:09:16,000 I can look at, you know, any magazine? 170 00:09:16,001 --> 00:09:18,000 Good housekeeping? 171 00:09:18,001 --> 00:09:20,000 It's...it's okay. 172 00:09:20,001 --> 00:09:22,334 Hey, buddy, if you freeze up, think of 173 00:09:22,346 --> 00:09:25,000 those twins in the chewing gum commercials. 174 00:09:25,001 --> 00:09:27,000 Right. Thanks. 175 00:09:39,001 --> 00:10:01,000 Now, you get a grip on yourself. 176 00:10:03,001 --> 00:10:15,000 I love it. 177 00:10:15,001 --> 00:10:23,000 Hey! Hey! There's someone in here! 178 00:10:23,001 --> 00:10:25,000 Jesus! 179 00:10:25,001 --> 00:10:27,338 Well, now you're not gonna let a little 180 00:10:27,350 --> 00:10:30,000 thing like that spoil your evening, are you? 181 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,000 I love it. 182 00:11:19,001 --> 00:11:36,000 Ten, nine, eight, seven, six... Five, four, three, two... 183 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:46,000 I suppose you realize, Sterling, that what you've done all the highly 184 00:11:46,001 --> 00:11:49,000 irregular, mind you, is of tremendous value, and you did it alone! 185 00:11:49,001 --> 00:11:51,000 That's the remarkable part of it. 186 00:11:51,001 --> 00:12:01,000 Now, Ellen, when I take this picture, you must not move. 187 00:12:01,001 --> 00:12:03,000 All right. 188 00:12:03,001 --> 00:12:05,000 Don't mock me. 189 00:12:05,001 --> 00:12:08,000 I'm gonna kill you for this. 190 00:12:08,001 --> 00:12:10,000 Careful, you're moving your feather. 191 00:12:10,001 --> 00:12:13,847 Did you get a chance to use the... Oh, yes. 192 00:12:13,859 --> 00:12:17,000 Those little guys are on their way. 193 00:12:17,001 --> 00:12:19,000 Thank you again. 194 00:12:19,001 --> 00:12:21,000 I just hope it wasn't too weird for you. 195 00:12:21,001 --> 00:12:24,000 I never want to go through anything like that again. 196 00:12:24,001 --> 00:12:27,000 No, no, it was nothing. 197 00:12:27,001 --> 00:12:29,000 Promise me something. 198 00:12:29,001 --> 00:12:32,000 Will you look after my child for me when I'm gone? Please. 199 00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:33,000 Anything? 200 00:12:33,001 --> 00:12:36,000 Promise me the books will be in the store when I get there. 201 00:12:36,001 --> 00:12:39,000 I don't want to be signing cocktail napkins like last time. 202 00:12:39,001 --> 00:12:41,000 Okay. 203 00:12:41,001 --> 00:12:43,000 Excuse me. 204 00:12:43,001 --> 00:12:46,000 Have you thought of a name? 205 00:12:46,001 --> 00:12:49,000 Are we changing the title? Is there a problem with Forest of Romance? 206 00:12:49,001 --> 00:12:54,000 No, no. I was talking about the... The baby. 207 00:12:54,001 --> 00:12:56,000 Oh. Yeah. 208 00:12:56,001 --> 00:13:00,000 I was thinking, if it's a girl, Alex. 209 00:13:00,001 --> 00:13:01,000 Alex. 210 00:13:01,001 --> 00:13:03,000 And if it's a boy, Albie. 211 00:13:03,001 --> 00:13:04,000 Albie. 212 00:13:04,001 --> 00:13:08,000 And you don't think he'll get beat up a lot? 213 00:13:08,001 --> 00:13:11,000 No, I like Albie. It was my grandfather's name. 214 00:13:11,001 --> 00:13:14,000 What about Ben? That was my grandfather's name. 215 00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:16,000 Ben's a good name. 216 00:13:16,001 --> 00:13:18,000 Morning, Ben. Great game, Ben. 217 00:13:18,001 --> 00:13:21,000 Why would I want to name him after your grandfather? 218 00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:26,000 Yeah. Just saying. It's a good name. Ben. 219 00:13:26,001 --> 00:13:33,000 Okay. Now, Ellen. Hold very, very still. Don't move. 220 00:13:33,001 --> 00:13:35,000 Tara. 221 00:13:35,001 --> 00:13:38,000 Release the bees. 222 00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:40,000 What? 223 00:13:40,001 --> 00:13:55,000 Toby, could you pick up the phone, please? 224 00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:59,000 Toby? 225 00:13:59,001 --> 00:14:00,000 Toby! 226 00:14:00,001 --> 00:14:02,000 What the hell's going on out here? 227 00:14:02,001 --> 00:14:05,000 Hey, you want to watch your mouth? We got an infant here. 228 00:14:05,001 --> 00:14:08,000 Gina's. Is that your baby? 229 00:14:08,001 --> 00:14:10,000 I can't believe how cute he is. 230 00:14:10,001 --> 00:14:12,000 What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 231 00:14:12,001 --> 00:14:14,000 Yeah, why wouldn't he be cute? He's got my eyes. 232 00:14:14,001 --> 00:14:16,000 He doesn't have your eyes. He has my eyes, Pinhead. 233 00:14:16,001 --> 00:14:17,000 Who are you calling a Pinhead? 234 00:14:17,001 --> 00:14:18,000 Shut up. 235 00:14:18,001 --> 00:14:19,000 You shut up. 236 00:14:19,001 --> 00:14:20,000 You want to hold him? 237 00:14:20,001 --> 00:14:21,000 Yeah. 238 00:14:21,001 --> 00:14:23,000 Come here, right, Toby. 239 00:14:23,001 --> 00:14:28,000 Can I hold him for a minute? 240 00:14:28,001 --> 00:14:29,000 It'll cost you five bucks. 241 00:14:29,001 --> 00:14:30,000 What? 242 00:14:30,001 --> 00:14:33,000 I got expenses. The kid's going to need money for college. 243 00:14:33,001 --> 00:14:34,000 A bail. 244 00:14:34,001 --> 00:14:36,000 Are you insane? I'm not paying you five dollars. 245 00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:37,000 Fine. 246 00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:41,000 All I've got is a 10. 247 00:14:41,001 --> 00:14:45,000 Okay. For 10, I'll let you change his diaper. 248 00:14:45,001 --> 00:14:46,000 You want him? 249 00:14:46,001 --> 00:14:48,000 Yeah. 250 00:14:48,001 --> 00:14:51,000 Hey, don't get ink on the baby. 251 00:14:51,001 --> 00:14:59,000 I read some place where you can always replace a father, but never a mother. 252 00:14:59,001 --> 00:15:03,000 Oh, I don't agree. Maybe they're both equally important. 253 00:15:03,001 --> 00:15:14,000 Surprise! 254 00:15:14,001 --> 00:15:16,000 Yes, it is. 255 00:15:16,001 --> 00:15:18,000 I just thought I'd bring you some things you're definitely going to need. 256 00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:20,000 Look, plastic keys. 257 00:15:20,001 --> 00:15:23,000 Bubble popping lawnmower things. Very, very important. 258 00:15:23,001 --> 00:15:26,000 Martin, this isn't the... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 259 00:15:26,001 --> 00:15:27,001 Super bear. 260 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:31,000 Although I kind of think he looks like a mouse, but I don't know. 261 00:15:31,001 --> 00:15:32,000 Hi, Ellen. 262 00:15:32,001 --> 00:15:37,000 Martin Tupper, this is Seth St. John. 263 00:15:37,001 --> 00:15:39,000 Hello. 264 00:15:39,001 --> 00:15:41,000 What are you doing here? 265 00:15:41,001 --> 00:15:42,000 How are you doing? 266 00:15:42,001 --> 00:15:45,000 What do you want? 267 00:15:45,001 --> 00:15:49,000 So, is this like a date? 268 00:15:49,001 --> 00:15:51,000 That's exactly what it's like. 269 00:15:51,001 --> 00:15:54,000 So what do you do for a living, Seth? 270 00:15:54,001 --> 00:15:55,000 I'm an actor. 271 00:15:55,001 --> 00:15:56,000 Really? 272 00:15:56,001 --> 00:15:57,000 What else do you do? 273 00:15:57,001 --> 00:15:59,000 I'm a regular on a soap opera. 274 00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:00,000 You like kids, Seth? 275 00:16:00,001 --> 00:16:01,000 Martin. 276 00:16:01,001 --> 00:16:02,000 Huh? 277 00:16:02,001 --> 00:16:03,000 Can I see you for a second? 278 00:16:03,001 --> 00:16:04,000 Wait. 279 00:16:04,001 --> 00:16:07,000 What the hell are you doing? 280 00:16:07,001 --> 00:16:10,000 Sorry. I'm sorry. I just didn't know you were seeing anybody. 281 00:16:10,001 --> 00:16:12,000 I mean, how serious is this? 282 00:16:12,001 --> 00:16:13,000 It's really none of your business. 283 00:16:13,001 --> 00:16:16,000 Well, I was just wondering, is he going to be around in ten months? 284 00:16:16,001 --> 00:16:17,000 Is he going to provide a stable home environment? 285 00:16:17,001 --> 00:16:19,000 What kind of a guy brings wine to a pregnant woman? 286 00:16:19,001 --> 00:16:21,000 Why'd he just bring a bottle of plutonium? 287 00:16:21,001 --> 00:16:22,000 Martin, I know you care. 288 00:16:22,001 --> 00:16:24,000 And I appreciate it. Really, I do. 289 00:16:24,001 --> 00:16:26,000 But you've got to care less. 290 00:16:26,001 --> 00:16:28,000 You're not going to be this baby's father. 291 00:16:28,001 --> 00:16:31,000 You're just the sperm guy. 292 00:16:31,001 --> 00:16:37,000 Okay, well, good luck on your tour. 293 00:16:37,001 --> 00:16:41,000 And I'll, uh, I'll see you when you get back. 294 00:16:44,001 --> 00:17:04,000 Hey, Twinkle Toes. Fun in the oven. Here to see you. 295 00:17:04,001 --> 00:17:06,000 Thank you, Toby. 296 00:17:06,001 --> 00:17:08,000 Could you just send Ellen in, please? 297 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:11,000 Hi. 298 00:17:11,001 --> 00:17:16,000 Hello. Welcome back. How was the tour? 299 00:17:16,001 --> 00:17:18,000 Pretty good, except Scranton. 300 00:17:18,001 --> 00:17:21,000 Oh. Sorry about that. 301 00:17:21,001 --> 00:17:23,109 Oh, that's okay. I just had to sign a couple 302 00:17:23,121 --> 00:17:25,000 of hundred copies of Where's Waldo now. 303 00:17:25,001 --> 00:17:27,000 Martin, we have to talk. 304 00:17:27,001 --> 00:17:31,000 I know. I know. Look, I want to apologize, okay? 305 00:17:31,001 --> 00:17:35,000 I mean, the last time I saw you, I was way, way, way out of line. 306 00:17:35,001 --> 00:17:38,000 You know, and it may be my sperm, but it's your child. 307 00:17:38,001 --> 00:17:40,012 And I'm sure you're going to do a great job 308 00:17:40,024 --> 00:17:42,000 of raising little Alex or Albie, you know. 309 00:17:42,001 --> 00:17:43,000 Martin. 310 00:17:43,001 --> 00:17:46,000 Wait, wait, wait. No. Please. Let me finish. 311 00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:50,000 I know you don't need my help, you know, but if you ever want it, you know, 312 00:17:50,001 --> 00:17:54,000 if there's ever anything I can do, you know, I'm here. 313 00:17:54,001 --> 00:17:59,000 I'm glad you feel that way because I'm not pregnant. 314 00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,000 Please, I'm sorry. 315 00:18:05,001 --> 00:18:13,000 So am I. So if you have any, I could use a little sperm. 316 00:18:13,001 --> 00:18:18,000 Okay. Okay. It's a win. 317 00:18:18,001 --> 00:18:22,000 Actually, now, my body temperature jumped by eight tenths of a degree this 318 00:18:22,001 --> 00:18:24,000 morning, so I'm ovulating. 319 00:18:24,001 --> 00:18:30,000 Please. Would you come to the bank with me? 320 00:18:30,001 --> 00:18:33,000 All right. I just have to cancel my two o'clock. 321 00:18:33,001 --> 00:18:35,296 Unfortunately, the clinics closed on 322 00:18:35,308 --> 00:18:38,000 Fridays, and on Monday, it'll be too late. 323 00:18:38,001 --> 00:18:43,000 We have to have sex. 324 00:18:43,001 --> 00:18:46,000 You forgot to say please. 325 00:18:46,001 --> 00:18:48,000 I forgot about that way. 326 00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:51,000 I have a hunch it'll come back to you. 327 00:18:51,001 --> 00:18:54,000 I just don't want to lose another month. 328 00:18:54,001 --> 00:18:56,000 What do you say? 329 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,000 Well, anything for science. 330 00:19:00,001 --> 00:19:11,000 You know what, Toby? You put in a long week. Why don't you just take the 331 00:19:11,001 --> 00:19:12,000 rest of the day off? 332 00:19:12,001 --> 00:19:14,000 Why? 333 00:19:14,001 --> 00:19:16,000 I'm giving you the day off and you're asking me why. 334 00:19:16,001 --> 00:19:19,000 Well, what if I don't feel like taking the day off? What if I feel like 335 00:19:19,001 --> 00:19:20,000 taking Monday off? 336 00:19:20,001 --> 00:19:23,000 Okay. Take Monday too. 337 00:19:23,001 --> 00:19:26,000 How about the whole week? Fine. 338 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,000 See you on Wednesday. 339 00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:38,000 Martin, I thought the desk would do. 340 00:19:38,001 --> 00:19:41,000 Well, that's one way of doing it. 341 00:19:41,001 --> 00:19:43,000 Sure. Sure. Whatever. 342 00:19:43,001 --> 00:19:46,000 Let's get to it. 343 00:19:46,001 --> 00:19:47,001 Okay. 344 00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:56,000 I'm having a namesake's choir responsibility. 345 00:19:56,001 --> 00:19:58,000 Wait. 346 00:19:58,001 --> 00:20:01,000 I can't just get to it. 347 00:20:01,001 --> 00:20:05,000 You know what? I'm not a faucet, you know. I need a little tenderness. 348 00:20:05,001 --> 00:20:11,000 Maybe take me to dinner or buy me a little gift or something. 349 00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:13,000 Come here. 350 00:20:13,001 --> 00:20:21,000 Better? 351 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:24,000 Little. 352 00:20:24,001 --> 00:20:38,000 Now, it's quite simple. Either these people are fit parents for the child or 353 00:20:38,001 --> 00:20:39,000 they're not. 354 00:20:39,001 --> 00:20:41,000 Is everything all right? 355 00:20:41,001 --> 00:20:44,000 Will you stick to business? Try to get that certain feeling. 356 00:20:44,001 --> 00:20:47,000 Fine. Just fine. 357 00:20:47,001 --> 00:20:49,000 Get on it, target. Get on it. 358 00:21:07,001 --> 00:21:10,000 He said I didn't have no father. 359 00:21:10,001 --> 00:21:13,000 Right, your papa. She's not my little girl. 360 00:21:13,001 --> 00:21:18,000 Something wrong? 361 00:21:18,001 --> 00:21:20,000 Bring my daddy back to me. 362 00:21:20,001 --> 00:21:22,000 Nobody wants me. 363 00:21:22,001 --> 00:21:29,000 I can't. I'm sorry. I can't be just the sperm guy. 364 00:21:29,001 --> 00:21:34,000 I can't care less. I can't do it. 365 00:21:34,001 --> 00:21:37,000 I understand. 366 00:21:37,001 --> 00:21:39,000 I'm really sorry. 367 00:21:39,001 --> 00:21:41,000 So am I. 368 00:21:58,001 --> 00:22:00,000 I'm sure you'll find somebody else. 369 00:22:00,001 --> 00:22:05,000 I know. So, how well do you know Richard Stone? 370 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,261 I guess everything has happened for 371 00:22:08,273 --> 00:22:11,000 the best. No women in our lives, Charlie. 372 00:22:11,001 --> 00:22:13,000 It's the open road for us. 27194

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