Original subtitles

What crime did they accuse you of?

They said a few words, but they were spoken hastily.

It was just chitchat.

When they condemn you, they give you no explanations.

They just say that you are a rightist element.

And you remain one until you're rehabilitated.

When they examine the remarks you've made,

they claim you have made certain remarks!

They blamed so much on me that I knew nothing about!

When you got access to your file,

what did it say?

For the rehabilitation inquiry they asked me:

"Were you re-educated?" "No."

"Did you go to the study sessions at the police station?"

"No."

"Did you have a court ruling?" "No."

So they explained to me that previously, the law stipulated

that to charge someone with being a rightist,

they needed at least the local government's approval.

That's how it worked.

In my case, nobody had approved anything.

He asked me if I'd seen the approval.

But there had been no approval.

The decision had been taken by one of those teams of 5 people

who fought against the rightists.

They took the decision without consulting any superiors.

It was the same story for everyone in Tianshui.

That's how it happened.

The harshest remarks I had made were about

the China Democratic League.

I said they were a bunch of incompetents

who had done nothing when the new constitution was drawn up.

I didn't say anything else of that nature.

Were many rightists named at your school?

No.

In the very beginning,

Wang Jianshan was the only one.

At first, he was the only one in the whole establishment.

Afterwards, they began to name two rightists every two days,

with no reason and without approval.

You were summoned and you left to work and be re-educated.

Were you the only one from your school to be sent to Jiabiangou?

There were 5 or 6 of us.

I was the first one to return.

From the school...

there was also Gu Huimin, he was the last to return.

He was the last one to come back from Jiabiangou.

Also, Yang Shihua, who had escaped one year before.

Did the others die there?

Nearly all of them.

Some cases you could just about understand,

but Xiao Shuyi from the n°1 high school,

we never understood his case. He had said absolutely nothing

and yet, he was charged with being a rightist.

"Dogs that look docile, are the most fierce."

That was their reason

for charging Xiao Shuyi.

Is he still alive?

He couldn't bare to be condemned a rightist,

he preferred to commit suicide.

The months that I was at Jiabiangou, the situation wasn't that bad.

We were hungry, but things were still alright.

However, once I had left that place,

the situation got worse and people became more and more hungry.

People began to eat cracked millet.

But afterwards, they could no longer defecate.

They had to be helped.

To take it all out with a chopstick, even if the anus was totally damaged.

Nobody had regular movements.

That didn't happen to me, I had already left.

When I left,

I was transferred from Jiabiangou to Qingshui.

I slept in Qingshui station before continuing the journey.

The journey from Qingshui to Lanzhou.

How did they know that you could fix cameras?

They had put up an announcement in the camp.

Then, they came and I did a test.

I spoke of my experience and they wrote it all down.

Three months later, I was transferred to Lanzhou.

Compared to Jiabiangou, it was night and day!

We had 24 kilos of grains per person, per month.

And the work wasn't tiring.

We even had time for ourselves.

Whereas in Jiabiangou, the cereal ration

was a few hundred grams per day.

And the work was very hard.

Life hangs by a thin thread!

Those two worlds had nothing in common.

Tell me a bit about life in Dashapin prison.

I spent my days checking and repairing photographic cameras.

The prison wanted to refurbish cameras.

One day, a man arrived from Shanghai.

Unfortunately our lenses were not polished correctly.

We didn't have much success.

The head of our Culture and Education section,

Chen Bozhang, was also away on a trip.

On the day we left, at the station, there was a big pile of books.

I couldn't even manage to lift them.

I said to him: "You should burn them all!"

"We must re-educate ourselves and leave here new men!

"I can't learn here, I'll be able to study better there."

Before leaving Jiabiangou, I saw Chen Bozhong.

It was four months since we had arrived.

He'd taken his bedcover outside, into the sunshine.

An unusual bedcover!

Usually, the quilt is white, but his was gray.

A gray trimming.

I thought to myself: the trimming of his cover is gray.

I went over to him.

It wasn't his cover that was gray,

it was just covered in lice!

That made it look gray,

but in fact, it was covered in lice.

"Don't they make you scratch?" "I don't feel anything anymore."

In my opinion, he had already lost his mind.

Could you tell us about your younger brother?

It was not long after I had left.

I was already at Lanzhou when they sent him to Jiabiangou.

He wrote to me when I was at Lanzhou.

He explained to me that he'd arrived and wanted to be re-educated.

Was he a rightist?

- Was he a rightist? - Yes.

Why had he been charged with being a rightist?

He had been named a rightist.

For what reason?

Go ask the rightists why they were charged,

not many of them know the answer.

My brother worked at the Bureau of Culture and Education.

- The Bureau of Tianshui? - Yes.

In the district government.

When did he die in Jiabiangou?

I don't know.

They sent a notice for his belongings to be collected.

The notice said he was dead, without saying when he had died.

Did they send you his personal belongings?

They sent...

a padded jacket.

Who looked after his family?

They looked after themselves.

His wife left...

As the situation here was impossible,

she left with a guy from Shaanxi, from Xi'an.

She took two of her children with her.

She took two of them, and left one here.

He still lives here, in Xiguan.

He's okay, he's doing quite well.

Of the two children she took to Xi'an, one of them died.

She also died there, in Xi'an.

I'm over 70 years old, now.

Back then, I was only about 20.

If I had been more unfortunate,

I might be there now, long reduced to dust.

I would like to know whether we were wrongdoers or not.

We naively let ourselves be taken away.

There, we were flawed people.

Completely flawed.

After rehabilitation, it was as if nothing had happened.

In my file, there were only a few words scribbled down

on a piece of paper.

"Isn't that you?" "My crime, this piece of paper?"

What took me there?

Nothing. A rightist? I wasn't one.

Anti-revolutionary? That wasn't my case.

All those years of good and loyal services that I'd given the Party!

Barely graduated, I became a volunteer for the Great North-West.

I was rehabilitated over 30 years ago.

I am well-educated with moral qualities.

I'm even quite talented at teaching math.

If it wasn't for my age, I'd still be teaching.

What did I do wrong? I would like to be told!

I would like to be shown.

I said something

at the time of the Anti-Rightist fight.

They asked us to do a critique of the Party.

If you said only good things you weren't credible.

So I said it had some faults.

I said: "The Party is sometimes a bit too distanced from the masses."

I was done for.

I was so naive.

They kindly explained to me that I was being sent there for 6 months

and that when I returned, I'd get my job and salary back.

All that, with no administrative procedure.

That was in October!

The decision to send me there was taken in October 1958.

The day before, I was still giving lessons.

On October 1, I'd even been to dance, for the national holiday.

You give the class, you go dancing

and the next day, you leave to melt steel!

My bags were ready when the studies director said to me:

"Professor Zhao, wait a moment." "What is it?"

He told me to come closer.

"In the past, you were ready to join the laborers,

and to work with the peasants.

I'm going to give you that opportunity."

I was happy!

At the time, you had to "work with the laborers and peasants."

Why deprive yourself of that?

But when I wanted to join the others,

they had all already left.

I asked many times.

I was naive.

I was blinded by my ideals.

Some people tried to tell me: "The school doesn't want you anymore!

Find another job, elsewhere. What's the point of insisting?"

"That's out of the question. I intend to remain a teacher."

I put on airs, I was a teacher!

I imagined myself back in my job six months later.

As I didn't let up on the school,

they asked an employee to accompany me.

The public security changed my place of residence

and got an employee from the school to accompany me.

I was very happy during the journey.

I was relocated and I didn't mind that.

My family lost their right to grain tickets

though my children were still very young.

When I boarded the train, I burst into tears.

I realized I was leaving my country and my family.

On the way...

My wife and three children accompanied me.

I stumbled forward, with difficulty.

I got down on my knees and I said:

"For better or for worse, I am leaving.

I'm no longer a resident here, I won't live off you.

I'm leaving!"

Jaw clenched, not turning back, I boarded the train.

Suitcases in hand, I left.

When I reached Lanzhou, getting off the train,

a swarm of people wanted my suitcases!

Why? They were there to recruit.

One wanted an accountant,

another an office worker,

someone said to me: "Come and work in our factory!

Come with us!"

And I thought to myself I'll go nowhere,

because in 6 months time, I'll be home.

They took my suitcases and I ran after them.

This farce lasted for more than one hour

until we were able to continue our journey.

We found some peace and quiet.

Another train took us laboriously to Jiuquan.

We stayed in Jiuquan for two days

before an old vehicle took us to Jiabiangou.

And then, when I entered the office,

it was a real farce.

They thought I was escorting the employee and wanted to keep him.

They wished me a safe journey back. Do you see the irony of it?

And the other guy protesting: "I'm escorting him!"

"Who is escorting who, here?"

It began with that comical moment.

Once I got to those barren lands, I began to wonder.

Li Jinghang was there.

Ren Jiwen, too.

As I hadn't eaten for 3 days,

I began to eat my supplies.

Ren Jiwen offered me his soup: "Zhao, you have to eat!

You won't last for long like that.

Look at the state of us!"

They bemoaned and I began to regret.

I had brought many things with me.

A watch, a woolen coat, jumpers and long johns.

A blanket and even my handsome fountain pen.

Because I'd gone there to study!

To toughen up through physical work.

Except that I'd been fooled.

I had even bravely announced that I had come

to this farm for exercise.

"You are here to be re-educated!" they said to me.

That's when I understood my mistake.

I came back on February 2nd 1961.

I stayed there for 2 years and 3 months.

Out of the 2,500 people, 2,200 of them died there.

Over 300 people came from Tianshui but only around 20 of them came back.

Of those of us who lived alongside the train tracks,

there were 100 of us, I'm the only survivor.

Throughout this period,

the reality of the situation and the psychological pressure,

were things we never told our families.

We didn't dare write about it.

The envelopes had to stay open.

We could only say good things.

Even if you'd lost all hope, you had to give some to your family.

"Everything is fine. I'll be home in 6 months."

They always thought that all was well for me.

"I'm fine. I have all I need." We didn't dare say anything.

After 6 months,

I managed to go in secret to Gaotai.

I went to someone's house and managed to write to my family.

When they read my letter, they understood!

I'd been conned.

I'd deluded myself as much as I'd deluded my family.

I arrived at the camp in 1960.

At the end of 1961, people began to die.

You went there in 1958, didn't you?

Yes, in 1958!

At the end of 1959, people began to die.

The wheat we had planted had only produced two grains.

The soil was highly alkaline.

We were meant to dig ditches to drain the alkali.

At 4 meters deep, there was still just as much of it!

There was nothing to be done.

At first, there were many of us.

We went to work at the foundries in Jiuquan,

we set the electricity poles.

At the start of '59, we were still alright. We had some brown bread.

But later on that year, we only had soup left.

The farm had entered into a contract with the state

and we declared ourselves self-sufficient.

We committed to providing our own food and giving a quota to the state.

When they heard this,

the state had no more reason to help us.

Towards the end of the year,

wild vegetables, turnips and other vegetables,

had become our daily food.

That's when I finally woke up. I realized I'd been conned.

What had I come here for?

When we were at the steel mill,

Yang Shihua, the head of high school n°3,

who died last year...

The blast furnaces,

the electric poles, the excavation...

He shouted from a platform: "Go on, go on!"

We lifted up the stones.

Some people lifted a basket of stones like that.

But others lifted two, or three, even four!

Why? Because you were given an extra bowl to eat.

The men exhausted themselves.

If we gritted our teeth, 2 of us could lift 2 baskets.

At the 3rd one, I could no longer feel my legs.

It was mostly the young men that died there.

I didn't show off my strength, I didn't have any.

That's how I survived.

That is a simplistic way of telling a very long story.

From early 1960, nothing grew anymore.

We blamed it on the seeds.

The management told us to plant sunflower.

We ate the seeds and planted the shells!

And the potatoes! In the afternoon we buried the sprouts

in the evening, we dug them up

to eat them.

Nothing grew!

The wheat only grew this high with at most two grains per ear.

That's when people began to die.

We moved to Gaotai-Mingshui

where it was even worse.

Gaotai...

There were people from all over the country.

There was nothing to eat and we swapped that nothing for... that!

They didn't sell any!

We learnt that our families were also in need.

What they sent to us, they took from their own mouths!

A few biscuits, some pancakes...

and most often, they sent us a kilo of bread.

But when we opened the packet, only a quarter of it was left.

Someone had eaten it on the way.

How could we complain to our families who were also in need.

My wife was strict with the children.

She told them: "Leave some for your father!"

Just so I could have a bread roll that she dried to send to me.

I remember my elder sister who stayed in Zhangjiakou,

who saved me the eggs from her chickens.

She cooked them and sent them to me.

But when they arrived, they were rotten.

When they sent us money, it was confiscated.

They had to take care to hide it well in the package.

We had a bit of money but nothing to buy!

There was nothing to buy.

You might have 30 yuans and not be able to buy anything.

When people started to die,

we placed them on an old plank with a mat.

We carried them.

Then, in the end, the men thought:

"Today, I'm the carrier. Tomorrow, will I be carried?"

So nobody took care of the dead anymore!

Afterwards, we moved to Gaotai where we lived in caves!

There, in the caves...

life was reduced to warming ourselves in the sun, when there was any.

We were filthy, and our hair was a sight!

We looked anything but human.

We had nothing to eat

and people died for three reasons.

The 1st reason was hunger.

Then it was our morale

and the 3rd, the psychological pressure.

One day, you saw one of your companions die

and you wondered whether it would be you next.

The more you thought about it, the more terrified you were.

In the cave, as soon as one person died,

we put them outside.

At the door to the cave.

Then, another living person was let in.

One stormy or snowy night was enough

to bring more deaths.

I don't know how many people I saw die!

I helped take them out.

Shortly afterwards, neighboring peasants

came to strip their clothes from their bodies.

To be frank,

they looked like bled pigs with their bare skin.

They were abandoned in the desert.

That's the level of cruelty that we were exposed to.

I can tell you a story.

There was a woman from the North-East

who must have worked in Xi'an.

She arrived at the camp with her 3 children.

That was before we came to Gaotai-Mingshui.

When we realized why she had come,

nobody dared talk to her.

"I've come to see my husband, where is he?" she said.

We all avoided answering her

because he was dead.

We told her to ask one of the managers.

We didn't know the director

but there was a manager by the name of Yan.

A large chap.

In the end, he said to her:

"I have to tell you, you husband is dead."

"Where is he buried?

I couldn't see him alive, I must see his remains."

How could we show her? Nobody knew where he was.

The wolves might have eaten him or God knows who else...

Now that she'd lost her husband,

and as she was there with her packages, she decided to stay.

"Look after my children, I'm going to stay here.

I won't cost you anything", she said.

She had bought many things

and she began praying for her dead husband.

She made offerings of incense and other things.

She dressed in the rags of an old sheet and cried for her husband.

Then, she said again: "I won't leave."

Her 3 children were gathered around her, and she said to them:

"Your father has died and your mother is not worthy of you.

You will stay here. Your destiny will decide the rest."

Then, she ran towards a pole, there were no trees!

And she hung herself.

Luckily, we were able to prevent the worst.

After she'd been saved, she stayed for 3 more days.

She had a train ticket but she wouldn't leave.

We all tried to convince her.

"Leave here quickly, this isn't a place for you.

You have enough worries with your three kids.

Look at us, a gang of devils!

Black hands, black faces, hairy and ragged.

What do we do in the sun, against the wall?

We rid ourselves of lice!"

It's impossible to get rid of those bugs!

In my country, we say:

"Debt is like lice, the more you have, the less it itches."

1 or 2 and it itches, any more and the itching stops.

We had no small brush so we dusted them off with our hands.

There's nothing to be done with lice.

I wasn't spared.

I had extra pairs of trousers but I didn't dare wear them.

They would have undergone the same fate, immediately.

So, I stayed as I was and dusted myself.

I had one obsession: there was no way I was going to die here!

They could all die, I would not!

I gritted my teeth... I will not die here!

That's all I could think about.

I had trouble walking but I was still alright.

Others couldn't manage anymore.

I want to tell you one more thing.

As we had nothing to eat, we'd buy salt crystals.

It felt like we were eating when we sucked them.

But the salt had far too much sodium

and our legs swelled.

Our arms were like matchsticks and our legs were huge.

Impossible to crouch down and even harder to get up again.

We had to defecate, even if we waited as long as we could.

We had to get into this position.

With our heads down, we could manage.

It took us so long that we couldn't get up again.

With our heads on the ground, we pulled up our trousers.

But we had no more strength to do them up.

That's why we walked with a limp,

like prisoners, holding our trousers up.

We went back and collapsed

in the sleeping area covered in a little grass.

Who knows what kind of grass!

We returned to our straw mats, indifferent to everything.

We were paralyzed.

Lifeless mind, lifeless heart, and lifeless body.

That same year, at the end of 1960, I escaped.

I escaped twice.

In July-August, I said to myself:

if I have to die, may it at least be outside.

To see my family once more.

In any case, death is waiting for me.

Some cunning people fled.

If a train went past and it was a slow train,

the bravest people climbed aboard and went to Xinjiang.

Others waited for another train.

I had no family in Xinjiang.

The first time, I made it to Zhangye.

That was one milestone reached.

But there, I bumped into our manager who had come to Zhangye!

How did he know that I had escaped?

He went to find the militia who handcuffed me.

Like a criminal.

Back at the camp, my belongings had disappeared.

It was still cold!

Fortunately, I wasn't punished. They just removed the handcuffs.

I had nothing left, only the daily bowl of gruel.

Let me tell you, that very night, by the light of the moon,

I prostrated myself on the dune more than once!

I got down on my knees even if I'm not religious,

and I implored Heaven.

I hadn't done anything wrong.

After my studies, I was a volunteer for the Great North-West.

Even if I was young and pretentious, young and romantic,

I'd done nothing wrong.

Why should I die here? I fell to my knees and I prayed.

I prostrated myself so many times that my forehead was sore.

Each time, I begged not to die here.

Let me see my family again.

Why had my escape failed?

It was the end of the year and more and more people were dying.

I could still walk and I decided to leave.

This time I'd succeed.

I didn't dare go home.

In the train, I pretended to be dead.

I told the ticket inspector that I had no ticket, I'd run away.

My fate was in his hands and he could throw me on the tracks,

but if he had a heart, he'd leave me alone

and understand that I was hungry.

The passengers asked me if I was an escaped criminal.

I'd done nothing illegal, I reflected the country, completely diminished.

After 2 and a half days, I reached Pekin.

My sister was there.

She worked for the railways

and lived behind Fuxingmen.

When I got to my sister's house, she didn't recognize me.

"What is going on?" "Nothing good."

I spent three days sleeping and eating.

I went to places where there were canteens.

I waited until the meal was over,

I looked for those who didn't finish and held out my bowl.

"Don't you want anymore?" I held out my bowl.

I spent two weeks like that.

My sister fed me too but I couldn't eat much.

A month and a half later, I could walk again.

I bought my train ticket and I went home.

The very next day,

the local committee found out. For them, I was an escaped prisoner.

They wanted to arrest me.

I couldn't stay at my house.

I begged them not to give my wife any trouble.

And I left.

I took some money, a few supplies,

and I left before daybreak.

Come in! Professor Pang, it's you!

So I took the train to go back to the camp.

I remember a guy from Xi'an who came to see a relative.

His brother was at Mingshui.

He had brought him some food from Xi'an.

I was warming myself in the sun when he asked for him.

I said to him: "Your brother..."

At first, I tried to hide the truth from him.

But in the end, I told him:

"Your brother died. There's nothing to hope for."

"Really?", he said.

"Several thousand people have died here that I don't know.

I knew your brother, I'm certain of that."

"I want to see his tomb!" "That's impossible."

"If you want to do something, pray to Heaven.

"Your intention as the elder brother will be heard."

He looked at me and I said:

"Night is coming. We are a few kilometers from Gaotai,

you can take the train there. However, you must cross the desert,

and the ground is covered in brambles on these winding trails.

I've done the journey several times, I will guide you.

Don't worry about me, I don't mind taking the risk."

He agreed.

We got to Gaotai in the dark of night, at around 8 PM.

He said to me: "I'm hungry. I have a few ration tickets left,

I'll take you to a restaurant."

Help yourself!

I couldn't refuse.

Please, make yourself at home!

After the dinner, he questioned me on the station platform.

I told him everything, from the school to my arrival at the camp.

He said it was the same story for his brother.

Then, I told him to board the train quickly.

He understood my situation.

"You have a good heart", he said to me.

"My brother is dead and I won't leave with this food."

He had some pancakes and roasted flour ready.

He had one 2.5 kg bag of flour and more than 1 kilo of pancakes.

He wanted to give it all to me.

"What about you, what will you do if you're hungry?"

"I won't eat on the way. I'll get to Xi'an quickly.

For my family, life is not so hard.

And we can buy things on the train."

I said to him: "You're saving my life!"

He gave me his address to go and visit him.

I told him that if I got out of there, I would.

We were emotional.

He left me the pancakes and the roasted flour.

"I've got some ration tickets left.

Here are 5 kilos of grains in ration tickets."

He gave them to me and I bowed before him 3 times.

"You weren't able to save your brother, but you saved my skin."

"Stand up quickly!" "Thanks to you, I am saved."

He had indeed saved my life.

I ate economically and made it last for two weeks.

A small amount, day after day.

Then, the order came!

We all had to go back to our work units.

The order was given.

Everyone began to send telegrams and to write

for people to come for us.

Someone was authorized to go send our telegrams in Jiuquan

or in Gaotai.

A few days later, our families arrived.

That didn't stop some people dying.

You thought: "my family will be here tomorrow."

And that was too much excitement.

One icy night was enough for your family to find you dead.

There were many cases like that.

Some people, who walked to the station helped by their families,

never made it. They died along the way.

Death was just a blown out lamp.

I was on a slow train.

My son was still young.

I looked like a regular offender with my ragged clothes.

There were no seats so we camped in the toilets.

A peasant must have forgotten his potatoes.

There was a small bag of potatoes hanging up.

Its owner must have forgotten it.

I thought: it doesn't matter if people think I'm a thief,

and I took 2 potatoes...

Well, stole 2!

They were this big.

One for the kid, one for me.

But I was seen, and somebody cried thief!

The train manager heard and made us get off.

It was a small station before Zhangye.

He made us get off immediately

and shut the door behind us.

I realized I'd left my belongings on the train.

What would we do without money?

I took the kid and lifted him up.

There were handles on each side.

He held the one on the left, and me the one on the right.

With my other arm, I held on to him tight.

I said to him: "Hold on tight, it's not hot,

but whatever happens, don't fall asleep!

It will be windy, but the wind mustn't carry us off.

Otherwise, they'll find us in pieces."

We waited to get to a big station to go back inside the train.

You...

I don't know why.

When we were encouraged to speak freely,

I didn't say much.

I didn't say anything in particular.

I expressed myself about a suspect.

I made a moderate criticism.

A few unpretentious words.

But then,

they revealed things said in private.

And that got me criticized.

Then I was told I had to leave,

although no meeting had ever declared me a rightist.

The qualification of rightist had to be proclaimed in a meeting.

"Let him take the rap!" Then, you knew where you stood.

I had none of that.

No such decision.

The day I left, I was given a piece of paper.

The school principal, An Hongsheng,

and the Party Secretary, He Guoxiang,

took me to one side to give me this paper.

"The civil administration has removed you from your position

and sends you for re-education.

As you're going to Jiabiangou, do your change of residence."

Your fate was settled in a few words.

A piece of paper!

I took this paper with me

and gave it to an official in Jiabiangou.

Han, the head of Propaganda & Education.

I tried to ask questions,

but challenging a verdict meant a double punishment.

And my punishment was likely to be commuted to a prison sentence.

I didn't protest.

I didn't even dare ask why I was there.

Later, when the rehabilitations occurred,

I tried, in vain, to find out more.

The former school principal

and the others

told me to drop it.

So, I put up with it.

At that time, I had already resumed my teaching.

I came home in 1961.

When I was released

in January 1961,

I spent 6 months in the hospital to get back on my feet.

Then, I came back here, to Shijiazhuang.

A month and a half later, the school sent me a telegram

asking me to be there for the start of the year.

That's when I went back to work.

When I asked if I'd been rehabilitated,

they asked me if I had been tried.

I had to resume my classes as if nothing ever happened.

It was in June 1958,

the 6th day of the 5th month of the lunar calendar,

that I arrived in Jiabiangou.

As I was telling you earlier,

I joined the construction team there.

At first, it was OK.

But I remember that as of October,

some tough guys, like Zhao Zhenfang,

went to extract gypsum or work in foundries.

As it was physically beyond me,

I was sent to Xintiandun.

In Xintiandun, I was assigned to agricultural team no. 6.

No, it was no. 7 or rather no. 5!

I stayed there till the spring.

In March or April,

Propaganda & Education

sent me to raise rabbits in Jiabiangou.

This farm

was called the "hutch"!

And "Hutch" became my nickname.

I think his name was Zhao.

Yes, I think it was Zhao.

This old man lived in Qinghai before being sent to Lanzhou.

He was from Shanghai.

We both looked after the rabbits

until 1959

and even until 1960.

Then, I was told that my rabbits died too fast.

This Zhao...

I forget everything! What was his first name?

Don't try to find him.

He died ages ago.

He survived the camp.

After I left the farm,

I got sick

and found myself in the infirmary.

That was in October 1960

when everyone was going to Mingshui,

the new farm.

As they were checking our health,

I went along with my luggage.

My luggage was a few clothes and a blanket.

I was examined and told:

"You're not going!"

And I got a lecture.

"With your health? Fall out!"

I didn't say anything. I waited to one side.

They all went to Mingshui, and I stayed here.

The head of the infirmary Chen Zaotang, kept me.

His name is written "Tang", the "Tang" character.

His hand is trembling.

You see?

Chen Zaotang drew me aside.

The others left.

"Gu Huimin!

Go to infirmary no. 3."

I thought I'd get treated.

In fact, I stayed till the end.

I came home from there.

So, despite the years spent in Jiabiangou,

I don't know much.

We knew nothing about one another.

For example, what criticism had LAN Jingrong made?

We didn't know.

Zhao Zhenfang and I were like brothers.

We could have talked about the reason for our detention.

Any exchange of information was strictly forbidden.

We couldn't talk about our own cases.

Strictly forbidden! We risked public criticism.

When the first prisoners arrived in the camp,

we took into account their physical condition.

The assignments were still relevant.

But when 2,000 men arrived at once,

they didn't pick and choose. Everyone found themselves

digging desalination trenches.

People from Tianshui generally did those jobs.

They were better fed and were even given a few coins.

Whereas we were once given 1 yuan, that's all.

Our hair and beards were this long.

We had no money to get our hair cut.

In winter, we had frostbite on our feet.

How it hurt. I was going to see Li Jinghang.

He'd been at the camp for ages and worked in the carpentry shop,

because he knew a bit about it.

I could warm myself up with a foot bath.

In his book "This Time Spent in God's Grace",

he says he feeds me.

Did you read his book?

He says he feeds Gu Huimin.

I often went to warm up there.

We were in the same teaching group in High School no. 1.

We taught mathematics and industrial design.

I taught industrial design.

In Jiabiangou, he became a carpenter.

I never asked any questions.

I never said: "What are you doing here?"

And he knew nothing about me.

Who dared speak?

The team leaders were intractable.

They sent you to mow a plot of 13 ares.

You were supposed to mow it and bring it all back.

Woe betide anyone who left any behind!

You also plowed 13 ares.

In winter, on the 12th moon,

without warm underwear,

I worked till late.

Fortunately, I had a very kind team leader.

"Gu Huimin, are you done?" "Almost."

"When you've finished, come see me."

He'd kept me some food.

Others would have said: "You have the nerve to ask?

Eat your shit!"

And you'd go hungry.

The team leaders?

Some were fair.

You had to deal with all these people.

The teams were made up

of 40 or 50 men.

Each team had its leader surrounded by some helpers.

There were good team leaders,

but most of them were ruthless.

They weren't all bad. I met some very good ones.

But although I met some good ones,

I also saw many scenes...

I always went to get my food later than the others,

because I'd noticed that you got more.

And once, in the kitchens, I saw a man tied up.

It's true that in the teams,

the men didn't always work very hard,

but some leaders were too strict.

If you read "Bitter Sun",

you'll see how Wang Jin treated his men.

Wang Jin and I had been colleagues

for 4 years.

It was under Ren Jiwen's leadership.

The account talks about a certain Zhang.

A team leader named Zhang.

I'd never met him.

Mind you, I was in Jiabiangou whereas he was in Xintiandun.

Men were treated hard in Xintiandun.

As an annex, his management was different.

But the most deaths were in Mingshui.

Initially, there were 2,700 of us.

I know this because I was Han's "pencil pusher".

There must have been 2,500 or 2,700 of us, my memory fails me.

When I came back to Tianshui, there was almost no-one left.

One day, Ma Yaozu asked:

"Seen Han? He came to find me, but I sent him back to you.

"I asked him how many had survived.

"He said

"just over 500."

Take, say, team no. 6 in Xintiandun.

The team leader was very hard.

Really hard!

I wasn't under him, but I saw him at work.

He was dreadful.

I witnessed his behavior.

I don't know if others mentioned him,

but I saw it with my own eyes.

There was a teacher

from Wuwei.

I happened to know him.

Like me, he'd taught at Zhangye Normal School.

At the time, Zhangye was my first assignment.

So we had been colleagues.

He graduated from Beijing Normal University.

He came from Northwest Normal University

and had spent 2 years in Beijing, after the victory over Japan.

After graduation, he was sent to Zhangye Normal School,

then to Wuwei before being called a rightist.

I saw him again at Xintiandun camp.

His face was swollen like this, so were his legs.

"What's wrong, old Xie?" His name was Xie Jianhong.

"What put you in this state?" "I'm sick."

"You must ask for time off." "It's not allowed."

I asked around and found out that his leader

called him lazy and said he was unwilling to work.

Actually, he was sick. You just had to see his face.

One day, at the first moon,

we had to manure the fields.

So, we had to carry baskets full of manure.

As he was too weak, he was told to fill the baskets.

Fill the baskets for others to carry.

It was full of stones, so it was very heavy.

Someone strong

could fill a basket in 2 spadefuls.

He wasn't strong enough and couldn't keep up.

In the end, he gave up and took to his heels.

He went to hide in the dormitory.

The wind was very strong, much stronger than here.

We could hardly stand.

I said to myself: "Let's go see Xie Jianhong."

"Why are you here?" "I hear you got a parcel."

"Here, I got some cigarettes." "No, thanks, you keep them."

He was lying on his straw mattress.

Like this, on the floor.

I went over and asked:

"What's the matter with you?"

I took the cigarettes from his pocket

and lit one for him and one for me.

He'd hardly had any when his team leader came.

"Xie Jianhong!

What are you doing here? Get to work!"

He grabbed him.

"Chief, he's sick!"

"I don't care!"

And he stood him up.

I insisted: "He's sick, I'll go instead."

"You shouldn't be here. Go back to your team!"

I was in team no. 5. I don't know what team he was in.

At noon, I went to get news and came across my team leader.

"Gu Huimin, go cover the manure."

If we didn't cover it, it would blow away.

I got down to it till noon, then went to get news.

Xie Jianhong was on the floor.

Duan, the doctor, was there.

Duan was also a camp rightist.

"Dr. Duan?"

He was dead.

Today it's hard to say what his sickness was,

but for me, if he hadn't been abused, he'd still be alive.

That's one abuse I witnessed.

I saw many people tied up. I quickly changed direction.

What good would getting involved do?

That's pretty much all I know.

Me and my rabbits

lived a quiet, uneventful life.

We are believers.

Do you know Li Jinghang?

He's a believer, too.

We're the same.

I got through it and don't deal with all that anymore.

It's better to let the Lord handle it!

During the years I spent there, of course I suffered.

We had severe frostbite. Our fingers were all white.

The lesions bled, and bandages didn't help.

I tried applying an ointment I got in Lanzhou.

For a yuan, you got some.

I spent a yuan on some ointment,

but the pain was still unbearable.

Li Jinghang said: "Be brave, I'll fix it for you."

He took a double thread and sewed me up.

Then he held my hand over the fire. It sizzled.

After that, it was good!

I was healed.

Over there, if you started crying, you could cry for ages!

When things were bad, people died every day.

In my dormitory, there were 14 of us, Up to 3 died a day.

It was OK until it snowed.

But when there were snowstorms in winter

and when seasons changed,

up to 5 people died a day.

Chen Zaotang, the chief, had asked me to be team leader.

I slept near the door and did the roll call.

That's all I could do.

We were given some oil each week,

and I'd light the lamp.

After dark, I'd do the roll call.

So-and-so, so-and-so...

So-and-so doesn't answer. "What's going on?"

Someone said: "He's not talking."

"Make a report!"

"So-and-so is dead."

I felt I was there, just waiting for the next one.

The authorities told us to make mutton soup.

Actually, we served them broth

with a few chives, soy sauce and vinegar.

"Do you want some more?" "I want some..."

And I handed the cup to the sick person.

Generally, he'd lie down. Soon after, they'd call me:

"He's not breathing." One more.

Death was never far away.

For that reason, I thank 2 people.

Chen Zaotang

and Wang Yanshan.

It's written...

During those 2 and a half years,

Chen Zaotang was always there for me.

He saved my life 3 times.

The first 2 times, with a shot for the heart.

The last time, with a homemade candy.

He slipped a sugar beet candy into my mouth.

"Gu Huimin! Gu Huimin!" "Yes, who's calling?"

Chen Zaotang shouted: "He's coming around!"

3 times I almost died.

People didn't go in excruciating suffering.

They slowly passed away.

Who was I talking about again?

I wanted to talk about Wang Yanshan.

There's plenty to tell. He knows a lot about Jiabiangou.

Wang Yanshan

was head of the secondary system.

I knew him in 1950 in Lanzhou. We took part in the Revolution.

When I was transferred from Zhangye to Tianshui,

he was section chief.

He was in charge of secondary schools.

Zhang Junyi was secretary general.

Wang and Zhang were 2 directors I was very close to.

Wang Yanshan was there, like me, for being a rightist.

He came from Yuzhong

and graduated from Lanzhou University.

As he had a good constitution,

they made him a gravedigger.

At the end, there was no-one to bury the dead.

We had no strength!

They took the strongest

and fed them well.

A good ration,

with extra bread.

Not at every meal, but morning and evening.

Or evening and lunch.

Wang Yanshan went without bread.

He put it to one side and when it was dark,

he came to the infirmary.

"Gu, take this.

"Ssh! Hide!"

I ate it under the covers.

I had my bread roll for 20 days.

The last 20 years.

It kept me going.

When they let us go, everyone left but me.

"Aren't you going?"

"No-one from home can come here.

Who'll help me?"

No authorization had been issued.

Chen said, "Get up and go!

"This is your only chance!

Look at that mop of hair! Shave it."

He shaved my head and beard.

"Get dressed!"

"I have nothing to wear anymore." "Get some from the shed."

The clothes of the dead, provided by the government, were stored there.

The truck left Jiabiangou at 10 AM

and reached Jiuquan at nighttime.

People died on the way.

In the back, the men were lying down like in the hospital.

They gave you some food to keep you alive.

Several died on the way.

Once we were on the train, it got better.

But at the station, I passed out in the crowd.

When I finally came around,

no more shoes!

Barefoot in the middle of winter, I was in trouble.

I shouted: "Who's got shoes?"

I had a leather shoe and a canvas one.

That's how I got to Lanzhou.

They put us up at Xinlan Hotel.

Many families from Tianshui were decimated.

I was alive, but my family was ruined.

We had 5 children.

They were all small. How could we cope?

- The youngest was this big. - I left with 3 yuans in my pocket.

In Tianshui, our salaries were taxed.

Out of my salary of 79.50 yuans, they only paid me 70 yuans.

And during that time, I actually only got 35 yuans.

How could my family survive?

My wife wanted me to take more money.

I took 3 yuans.

3 yuans for 3 years.

As if I could afford to worry about my appearance!

She'd made me shoes, and I sold them

to get a haircut.

We thought we'd be home soon.

Who could have imagined such a hellhole?

Without the rescue decision

and without all those dead,

we wouldn't be alive.

We weren't supposed to come home.

We were supposed to be employed

to build a city for re-education through labor.

As the head of the camp said:

"A city with great buildings and factories

where we'll work together and bring our families!"

So, we didn't know what to do with all our dead.

And he talks about sandstorms...

He never saw any! Whereas I saw lots.

Several a year.

When the wind of yellow sand came, it could bury you.

There were storms which made the sky go black.

Black sand which fell as rain.

Once, we lost 2 men.

2 who didn't come back from Beishawo.

I sheltered in my rabbit hutch, safe and sound.

As a believer,

I thank the Lord for letting me live.

On this point, I'm with Li Jinghang, right?

The anti-rightist movement

was in 1957.

In 1956,

police would come every week

and stand outside our church.

It wasn't a good sign.

During the winter,

shortly before New Year,

a pastor from our community, Ma Hezhen, said to me:

"Professor Li, we must gather and pray

so that the holiday season is a peaceful event."

I went to find the faithful, but no-one dared to show their faith.

Out of 100 members, no-one wanted to take the risk.

There was just me praying every morning at 4 AM,

with the pastor for 3 days.

At that time, we could avoid police surveillance.

The 1st day went off without a hitch.

It was a long trip between Dongguan and Dacheng Avenue.

It took me a half hour on foot.

I'd get up at 4

and go and pray.

So, we finished by 6 at dawn.

The 1st day, it went well. The 2nd day, the pastor said to me:

"Professor Li,

in the next few days, we should sleep with our doors and windows open."

I asked him why. He said: "Satan is acting up."

"Father, are you afraid? "Why? God protects us!"

In my book, I describe how,

on the 3rd day, I was afraid going to church.

When I got there, I had only just kneeled down

when the little door next to me started squeaking.

I imagined a boy was listening at the door

and reporting back to the authorities.

I got up and rushed over to the door

to grab the boy.

I opened one of the double doors.

I tried to grab the boy...

He'd run away. I couldn't find him!

I looked all around the courtyard.

There was no-one in the bushes.

What had made the noise?

The wind? The bamboo wasn't moving.

The leaves in the trees were still.

Clearly, it was the devil.

I went back inside

and started praying again.

As I was praying,

I turned to check everything was OK in the yard.

As I looked out of the window,

I saw light burst from one of the trees in the yard.

An explosion of light.

I thought it must be Father Wei's flashlight.

But it would have been a beam,

not an explosion.

It was an explosion of red light.

As I was still wondering about it...

I was kneeling in the aisle,

a long space.

In front of me, everything flared up.

A beam of light came from the ceiling.

Our ceilings used to be covered with paper,

not like now.

The light came down and spread over us.

It covered everything.

This electric light was like lightning flashes in June,

but this big in diameter.

A light without the slightest dust.

A light without the slightest impurity.

I was flattened to the floor

and I hid my head under the pew.

Facing the floor, I begged as I did in Jiabiangou:

"Glory to You, Lord!

"O Risen One, be my savior!"

I begged as much as I could.

Then, I went over...

While I was begging, Father Ma cried out:

"Professor Li, come!"

Although I was well into my 30s,

I crawled over to him.

Then, I heard old Liu in the yard.

"Professor Li, is everything alright?"

I opened the window.

He thought I'd had an unpleasant encounter.

I called out: "Dear Liu, don't worry, I'm fine!"

After that, I couldn't pray.

Father Ma asked me:

"Professor Li, what did you cry out earlier?"

"I saw a light,

a big beam which hit the floor.

This big,

like a flash of lightning."

Inside, everything was lit up!

Like when light spreads in open country after lightning.

Do you see?

It was as bright as that.

Everything lit up before I was thrown to the floor.

He said he hadn't seen any light on my head.

I didn't dare reply that he was in front of me,

so he couldn't see any light on my head.

I kept quiet.

What's the point?

I couldn't understand what had happened.

Why a red light and a white one?

The pastor had no explanation, nor did I or anybody.

It was incomprehensible.

One thing was certain: it wasn't lightning

or the building would have collapsed,

and we'd have been struck down by lightning.

It wasn't the case.

It was indeed a divine manifestation.

Was it God? I don't know.

I only understood when I went back to Jiabiangou.

I finally understood.

It took me those 4 years to understand.

Red was the devil's light.

The devil was restless,

he was acting up.

White was the light of the Lord.

Of course.

He was saying: "My son, next year will be terrible for you.

You'll be sent to a camp. You'll need courage.

Trust yourself. I'll be by your side."

I finally got it!

Society then rejected people like me.

In such a context, I was persona non grata.

Persona non grata.

I was likely to get into trouble.

Not being on the same side, I became an opponent to be excluded.

From a moral standpoint,

I was blameless.

I was a conscientious teacher.

I behaved like an honest man.

I submitted to the organization of the Party

while worshipping God,

which I considered beneficial to the nation.

Was there a lot of pressure? Yes, there was.

I taught high school for a junior high salary.

I was the target of many campaigns

from 1950 until 1978.

I faced many attempts

to remodel me.

I got constant ideological re-education.

But my faith in God remained steadfast.

Through re-education,

I learned to serve the Party with all my heart

and apply myself to my work,

without blaming anyone.

But the more I re-educated myself, the stronger my faith became.

After a month's hard labor in Xintiandun,

I had already lost my health.

Every night,

I had seminal losses.

Nocturnal emissions, see?

Every night, I'd wake up, my belly covered in semen.

For a man to do that,

he must be in poor health.

Mustn't he?

Where I come from, it's called "losing self-control"!

When it happens to you every night, you think the end is near, right?

I don't mean occasional accidents.

Every day, I woke up, my belly covered in semen.

I'd stagger around,

my soul in turmoil.

I thought my end was near.

"Lord, are You calling me?

Tomorrow, I'll lie down on the site.

People will walk over me.

They'll ask if I'm playing a run-over dog.

The cadres can criticize and fight me.

I'll let myself be trampled on.

Lord, tomorrow I'll give myself to You."

I was crying.

"Lord, tomorrow...

Do what You think is right, I'm in Your hands."

The next morning,

the team leader

brought us some fried pancakes

for breakfast.

As he left, he suddenly started screaming:

"Li Jinghang!

Go to the carpentry shop."

Heaven granted me grace.

At the carpentry shop, we could eat better

and sleep better.

We weren't in the sun.

I felt alive again!

Once there,

I pulled out a Bible.

Kneeling on the bed, I started praying.

God the Father had me given a Bible.

I opened it at random and I read:

Be in peace and obedience.

I don't recall the exact words.

Where were the dead of Xintiandun buried?

I don't know exactly. I was in the carpentry shop.

Somewhere in the dunes.

At first, I made caskets to bury them in.

Then, we just buried the dead in their blankets.

There's a story I tell in my book.

My wife had come to see me.

I was on my bed.

I was humming hymns.

"Li Jinghang!

You're singing religious songs!"

A young man approached my bed.

There was a little stove.

It wasn't lit, but he pretended it was.

"Where are you from?" "I'm from Nankin.

I studied history in Nankin. I'm 27.

I never would have imagined human beings could come to this."

Just then, a cadre came in.

"Get back to bed!"

And he went back to his place.

In the evening...

we heard: "Nobody move!"

I looked up and I saw him, completely naked.

They took his body away, carrying it over me.

The next morning,

my wife told me they'd taken 5 away.

5 bodies piled up, tied up in their blankets.

On each of them,

they'd put a piece of wood this big.

On his, a Christian name had been written!

So he was a brother!

I've forgotten his name. He was from Nanking.

We had to prepare spring sowing.

Zhang Zhongliang, the Gansu secretary,

had made it a real battle.

But there was nothing there!

We should have brought supplies.

I was in charge of the luggage.

"Li, what took you so long?!

We've been in close formation for days!"

"Close formation"

meant that we kept close to stay warm.

No more than that.

We've been waiting for you for days, all huddled up.

You could also hear it like a play on words.

"Li, now you bring our things!

I've had time to become squad leader!"

Actually, the men slept huddled up outdoors.

Do you understand?

The troops had been sent before the supplies.

The men had nothing to eat,

and at night, they were freezing to death.

There weren't any shelters.

Once we got there, we started to dig them.

It was really hard!

Do you know which camp in Mingshui you lived in?

I don't know. I arrived at night after a day's traveling.

There was a village, but I mainly remember the site.

We boarded the train

in Jiuquan and reached the camp at 11 PM.

One other thing I've never talked about.

When I was there, I was moved to another dormitory.

A man was sleeping just there,

at my feet.

There was a blanket on him.

He was groaning, but no-one gave him any food.

He didn't have his own place, so no-one took care of him.

3 days later, he died.

Right there at my feet. Isn't that terrible?

Why didn't he have a bed?

I was already at the end. There was no more room.

He wasn't supposed to be there, so he wasn't fed.

Maybe he'd been forgotten at the roll call.

His name wasn't on the lists.

Food was in short supply, so he got nothing.

He groaned for 3 days before dying under his blanket.

What cruelty!

Today, I still think about it. Why didn't he have a bed?

At my feet, it wasn't a bed,

but he'd been left there as if there was no other solution.

So,

since he wasn't on the list, he wasn't entitled to rations.

The cadres didn't check, and the kitchens didn't care.

He groaned for 3 days before he died.

His name was... I forgot his name. He wasn't married.

He'd turned 40, so people made fun of him.

They called him the "old virgin",

because he wasn't married.

He was a cadre.

One evening,

I came out of my hole

and I prayed to God.

"Lord!

In the days of the Old Testament, there were miracles.

I want a miracle today!

I demand one of God."

I got out of my hole,

scrabbled up the dune,

and stood at the top.

"Lord!

In Old Testament times, You did miracles.

Today, I need a sign of Your divine action!"

Let's say a rabbit comes to me,

and I catch it.

There was nothing other than rabbits around there.

Then, I thought:

The rabbit may take 5 minutes to reach me.

But

if it takes a half hour, I won't last.

The wind is much too strong.

The coat I'm wearing is far too light.

I won't last.

"Lord, what if 3 rabbits flew up to me!"

Then, I saw 3 birds above me and I raised my hand.

3 birds came to land in front of me.

I looked at them.

There were 3 of them.

Not one less.

In my book, I explain their behavior.

Coordinated movements.

I couldn't believe my eyes.

In summer, there are no birds here.

Where did they come from in winter?

They were real,

but I didn't feel I could catch them.

They seemed more and more real to me.

It all lit up!

So I left them and went home.

Not many people could understand.

It was obvious to me: "Lord, I have sinned."

Why?

Because if a rabbit had really come,

I had nothing to skin it with.

If I'd opened it with a stone, I had nothing to cook it with.

And anyway, I would have died immediately

as my organism was weak with hunger.

My approach wasn't serious

and I went home, leaving the birds.

Who can believe my story?

No-one.

I can't force anyone to believe me.

That's how it was!

People may not believe me, but I'm here in the flesh!

To the youngest in the family, I tell the facts as they are.

That is the 1st story.

The 2nd...

The 2nd...

After my wife left...

Usually, I had peaceful nights.

"Lord, I sleep before Your throne of grace."

I always prayed, but that night, I couldn't.

I couldn't sleep and I heard a voice,

but I couldn't tell where it came from.

It said: "You must not break the 3 arrows."

Arrows.

"You must not break the 3 arrows."

I had to sleep...

"Don't break the 3 arrows." A tiny whispering voice.

Where did it come from? I don't know.

One thing was certain, she was talking to my inner self.

3 arrows... 8, 9 PM,

10, 11 PM, etc.

The whole night!

A very clear voice and me in the fog.

A whole night in total confusion.

And that voice still present.

What were those 3 arrows that couldn't be broken?

It was better to get up and get some fresh air.

I got dressed.

I'd barely put a foot on the ground...

Let's say that was my bed.

I felt dizzy.

I went back to bed and started raving.

"Take my body away!

Take my body away!"

A cadre was there and yelled at me:

"What are you talking about?"

Then, he left.

At the foot of my bed,

I had a metal cup.

A man came and took it away.

I yelled: "Leave it!

It's too soon to fleece me!"

And he put the cup down.

Then I got delirious again.

Everything became clear.

No doubt about it,

Satan was trying to take my life.

Satan declared war on me.

I started praying, begging the Lord.

"Glory be to you, Lord!

O Risen One, be my savior!"

I begged for all I could.

A voice said to me:

"Hell is terrible!

"Satan, that hell you talk about belongs to you!

I'm in Heaven, away from you."

Of course, I didn't see Satan. I implored again and again...

"Glory to you, Lord!"

After long curses,

I was coming around and I started reciting the Bible.

No, not yet!

A voice told me:

"Get up!

Get rid of the oil

that your wife brought you. Pour it in!

It won't save you.

Do the same with the flour.

Come on, get up!"

"Satan!

The oil is my father's blood.

My family went without for this flour

when it was in need."

I didn't listen.

I was regaining my self-confidence

and I started reading the Bible.

A sermon said:

"Take the helmet of salvation,

Have truth as your belt,

the sword of victory in your hand.

In the name of Christ, I say: Back, Satan!"

After that, I don't know.

Then, in the evening:

"Li Jinghang, get up and eat!"

To eat, we had a bowl of groats.

No bigger than this.

I was about to eat when a voice said in my ear:

"If you eat, you will lose your life."

A clear voice whispered in my ear.

"Satan!

Life is not just about food."

And I hurriedly swallowed my gruel.

I've never had a night as peaceful as that one.

I remember the last shelter I was in.

A big troglodyte dormitory

where there were just 2 of us.

Me and someone else.

I was leaning like this against the door

when I saw a bus coming.

A bus for at least 20 people with only 1 passenger.

He got out and said to me, tapping my shoulder:

"Comrade, in a couple of days, you'll have rice and flour."

What did that mean?

On that note, the official left and came back 3 hours later.

He gave us a shot.

His attitude was very different.

We were perplexed. The rescue plan had started!

But there were only 2 of us left!

2 people in this big space.

How many survivors were there in your ravine?

At the end? It's hard to say.

I don't know.

How many people did the bus take?

What bus?

First they took us to Gaotai.

I mean from Mingshui.

The day we left Mingshui, there were only 2 of us.

Pu Yiye and me.

- By tractor? - No, by bus.

A large vehicle which took us to the station.

I heard

that the city of Tianshui had sent 238 people

and that only 21 people came home alive.

Not even a 10th, because that would've made 33 people,

23 people!

Only 21 survived.

Not even the percentage that's usually mentioned.

The case of Tianshui wasn't the worst.

In the district of Xianhe, of the 6 intellectuals who left,

not one came home.

100%!

Of the 5 teachers from Tianshui Normal School

and the 6 teachers from High School no. 1,

of those 11,

I'm the only one who came back.

Only 1 came back.

Without God's grace, we wouldn't have seen anyone.

From Tianshui Normal School, none came home.

How many districts didn't see anyone come back?

100% deaths!

Who made it out?

The cooks, the gravediggers,

kitchen helpers, the horse keepers.

They came back.

And those who escaped.

Apart from them, almost no one survived.

Or a very low percentage, maybe 1 or 2%.

My treasure.

You'll see, there are dates listed.

Here, we can read: December 4, 1960.

December 4, 1960.

December 4, 1960.

That night, I asked: "Lord, why is it so hard?"

Here's his answer. It's brilliant!

He was talking to me!

That's old stuff. December 1960...

There, I was in the carpentry team.

194...

July 15, 1958, it was at the workshop.

The 1st time at the workshop.

There are lots of dates!

All the dates when the Lord spoke to me.

I think those from Tianshui, like me, formed the 2nd group.

We were the 2nd group to be sent there.

- Why were you sent there - I was a rightist.

A pure rightist,

without any "historical" mention or anything else.

Just rightist.

How were you designated a rightist?

I had criticized an officer of my unit.

He was posing as a veteran,

a former 8th Army soldier,

which he wasn't.

He was a rough character,

without any education.

In my work unit, there was only 1 deputy position.

He'd spend his days with his kid, wandering the streets.

He led a very dissolute life!

That's why I criticized him.

We had a great director who was very serious.