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[MUSIC]
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[MUSIC]
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[MUSIC]
4
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[MUSIC]
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Jill.
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Jill.
7
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Hey, Jill.
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Look, I got your favorite, avocados.
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I'll make the dip if you'll make the martinis.
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Jill.
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Hey, Jill.
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Jill.
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I have a feeling I'm talking to myself here.
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Jack, darling, took mother to Bloomingdale's.
15
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You know how mother is about a sale.
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She's like the swallows of Capistrano, of Jill.
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Damn it.
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(doorbell chimes)
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- Hi, fuckface.
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So you thought you could dump me, you little worm.
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What did you think I was, a one-time chick
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get your jollies and run not with Lucy?
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Hear me, buster?
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Hey, you can't come in here now.
25
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- I'm already in, what are you gonna do about it?
26
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- I'll call the--
27
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- You'll call what?
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Call the cops.
29
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I'll tell them you're a pansy little pervert
30
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that jacks off on girls' faces.
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- You wouldn't dare.
32
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- I wouldn't, try me.
33
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So this is your little love nest, huh, Jack-Jack-Off?
34
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What do you do, hit your rocks off on the plants?
35
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Fix me a drink, scumbag.
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- Uh-oh, sure, I'll fix you a drink.
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I'll fix you a drain on the rocks to cleanse your mouth.
38
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- You're very funny, you should try out for the gong show.
39
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- Look, what do you want from me?
40
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- What I want is money.
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Money, money.
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50 bucks to be exact.
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- What the hell for?
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- Aw, look at little Mr. Innocent.
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I came here to fuck, you know,
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the pay now, fuck later plan.
47
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- Oh yeah, well let's make it later, much later,
48
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like I'm not in the mood.
49
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- Aw, did the little birdie get your worm?
50
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Well, tough kitty.
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It's gonna cost you 50 bucks to get rid of me.
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- You're not worth 50 cents.
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- Hey, look, creepo, I'm an expensive chick.
54
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I turned two tricks today at $100 a piece,
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but I'm giving you a discount.
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- Who'd you fuck, Abbott and Costello?
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- Funny, funny.
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Okay, far face, what's this gonna be,
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a blow job, trip around the world?
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Maybe you'll like something kinky,
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like dressing up in my clothes.
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Nah, I think I'll piss on you, you freak.
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- Shut your fucking mouth.
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You want your money, all right?
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Here's your whore face money.
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- That's for nothing, asshole.
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- Where do you think you're going, you slut?
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You're gonna get what you fucking deserve.
69
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- Hey, nobody treats me like this.
70
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- Oh, this is the first time, you rotten little cunt.
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- What are you gonna do?
72
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- I'm gonna give my 50 bucks worth.
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You piece of filth.
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I know what you want.
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You want my hot cock down your throat,
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or you're going to have to earn it.
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All right.
78
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Take your clothes off.
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Now!
80
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- Not that way.
81
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No, no, I want you to take 'em off slow and sexy.
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I want you to give me a show.
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I'll give you a show.
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That's it.
85
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Nice and easy.
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Oh, yeah.
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I'll bet you're dying to get my cock in your mouth,
88
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pumping away with my balls flopping against your chin.
89
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your chin. Pinch those tits. Make them hard. Oh, that's nice. That's real nice. How many
90
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cocks did you have up your snatch today? Bet you had more than two, huh? Show me your pussy.
91
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Show it to me. Tell me about those cocks. How were they? How did they feel? It felt...
92
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Oh yeah, I had a lot of cocks today. All kinds of cocks, pumping me full of cum. Oh, it felt
93
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so great. I took one after another. I had a small one and I had a nice, black, juicy
94
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one, pumping me full of cum. Oh yeah, it felt so great. Okay, bitch, now I want you to get
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down on your hands and knees. Come on. Come on on your hands and knees. Come on now. Down,
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down, down. All right, now I want you to... I want you to crawl over to me and I want you to
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beg for it. Come on. Come on, Lucy. Beg for it. Come on. I want it. You want what? I want it.
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You want what? I want your cock. You want my cock? I want your cock. You want my cock.
99
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I want your cock. You've got to undress me first. Go ahead. First the shoes. That's it.
100
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You got it. Tell me how much you want my cock. I want it more than anything. One of your
101
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shoes, God damn it. Take out the other shoe. Come on, make it fast. Make it real fast.
102
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Cock sucker. Give it to me. Come on. You want it? You want it a lot? Yes, I do. Well,
103
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then tug on those pants. Pull with it. Go ahead. Pull it. Pull it. Come back. I want to
104
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tuck you. I want to have your balls in my mouth. Back off. That's nice. Stay right there. Don't move.
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- Move.
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Oh, does that look nice?
107
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Does that look like a nice cock?
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- It's a beautiful cock.
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- Is this the nicest cock you ever had?
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- The nicest cock I ever had.
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- You wanna suck this cock?
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- Yes, I do.
113
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- You wanna suck it hard?
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- I wanna suck it hard.
115
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- You wanna suck it all the way down your throat?
116
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- I wanna choke on it.
117
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- Let me just rub this cock on your shoulder.
118
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- Oh, oh, don't tease me like that.
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Give it to me, give it to me.
120
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You ran it down my throat.
121
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- Hold it, hold it.
122
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All right, take it.
123
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Oh yeah.
124
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Oh, oh.
125
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Oh, that's nice.
126
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You got it now.
127
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Suck that cock.
128
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Get it all the way down your mouth.
129
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Oh yeah, that's fine.
130
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Suck on it.
131
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Oh, yeah.
132
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Juicy cock, take it.
133
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Oh, oh yeah, that's good.
134
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It's real fine.
135
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Suck that fucking cock.
136
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Ah, oh, that's nice.
137
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Oh, that's nice, that feels good.
138
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That feels fine.
139
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Suck that dick.
140
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Suck that fucking cock.
141
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Suck it good.
142
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That's it, that's it.
143
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Suck that cock.
144
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All right, now I want you to run on your back.
145
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Okay, I want you to spread your legs, spread them wide.
146
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That's right, show me your pussy, that's it.
147
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Ah, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
148
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Ah, that's nice.
149
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You can handle another finger in there.
150
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You can handle another finger in there, that's nice.
151
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That's nice, you're gonna get it.
152
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You're gonna get it, you're gonna get the whole thing.
153
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Go, go, now.
154
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I'm not gonna fuck you until you say, "Fuck me."
155
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Fuck me.
156
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Fuck me.
157
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Oh no, more than that, more than that, more than that.
158
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Fuck me.
159
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You can't fuck me.
160
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Fuck me.
161
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You got it.
162
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Oh, you son of a bitch.
163
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Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, that's there.
164
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You got it now, you fucking cunt whore.
165
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You fucking slut-faced cunt whore.
166
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You got that big fucking cock.
167
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You got it now.
168
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Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah, that's nice.
169
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(grunting)
170
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- Suck me, you son of a bitch!
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Come on!
172
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- You feel that in there?
173
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- Yeah.
174
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- You feel it good and hard?
175
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- Grab it!
176
00:10:45,250 --> 00:10:46,270
- You feel it getting stronger?
177
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- Yes!
178
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- You feel it getting bigger?
179
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- Yes!
180
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- You feel it filling your whole cut?
181
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- Yes, it is.
182
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- It's getting bigger.
183
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- I want your juice.
184
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- You're gonna get it.
185
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You're gonna get that fucking juice.
186
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(grunting)
187
00:10:56,650 --> 00:10:58,190
You want me to shoot it all over your tits?
188
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- You want me to shoot all over the tits?
189
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- I want to drink it!
190
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- Oh, you got it?
191
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(grunting)
192
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- Oh, motherfucking cunt!
193
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- Come on!
194
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- I ran it.
195
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(grunting)
196
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- Press that rod!
197
00:11:08,930 --> 00:11:10,630
- Okay, okay, now you're getting close.
198
00:11:10,630 --> 00:11:11,930
Oh, you're getting close.
199
00:11:11,930 --> 00:11:14,470
(grunting)
200
00:11:14,470 --> 00:11:15,310
You ready?
201
00:11:15,310 --> 00:11:16,150
- I'm ready!
202
00:11:16,150 --> 00:11:16,970
- You ready?
203
00:11:16,970 --> 00:11:17,810
You fucking ready?
204
00:11:17,810 --> 00:11:20,070
(grunting)
205
00:11:20,070 --> 00:11:23,890
Okay, okay, here's that hot cum you've been waiting for.
206
00:11:23,890 --> 00:11:24,990
Ready?
207
00:11:24,990 --> 00:11:26,090
Ready?
208
00:11:26,090 --> 00:11:27,250
Take it!
209
00:11:27,250 --> 00:11:29,190
(grunting)
210
00:11:29,190 --> 00:11:30,030
- You got it!
211
00:11:30,030 --> 00:11:30,850
You got it!
212
00:11:30,850 --> 00:11:33,130
(grunting)
213
00:11:33,130 --> 00:11:35,370
(groaning)
214
00:11:35,370 --> 00:11:37,630
(groaning)
215
00:11:37,630 --> 00:11:39,630
[Groaning]
216
00:12:05,630 --> 00:12:08,630
You bag of shit!
217
00:12:08,630 --> 00:12:12,630
You're nothing but a motherfucker, you lousy bastard.
218
00:12:12,630 --> 00:12:15,630
You get your rocks off and you're nothing but a weed.
219
00:12:15,630 --> 00:12:17,630
I'm not finished with you yet.
220
00:12:17,630 --> 00:12:19,630
Where the hell do you think you're going?
221
00:12:19,630 --> 00:12:22,630
You're gonna eat some pussy first, get it?
222
00:12:22,630 --> 00:12:23,630
No.
223
00:12:23,630 --> 00:12:24,630
No?
224
00:12:24,630 --> 00:12:25,630
No!
225
00:12:25,630 --> 00:12:27,630
All right.
226
00:12:27,630 --> 00:12:28,630
Watch this.
227
00:12:28,630 --> 00:12:31,630
You big man, big he-man.
228
00:12:31,630 --> 00:12:34,630
Get your rocks off and let Lucy do nothing.
229
00:12:34,630 --> 00:12:35,630
Walk away.
230
00:12:35,630 --> 00:12:37,630
Nice flowers.
231
00:12:39,630 --> 00:12:40,630
Now!
232
00:12:40,630 --> 00:12:43,630
Do you want me to tear the whole fucking place apart
233
00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:45,630
or are you gonna eat some pussy?
234
00:12:45,630 --> 00:12:47,630
Yeah, you're gonna eat pussy.
235
00:12:47,630 --> 00:12:49,630
Get that tongue in there.
236
00:12:49,630 --> 00:12:50,630
Lick it.
237
00:12:50,630 --> 00:12:54,630
Lick it better than you can use your cock, motherfucker.
238
00:12:54,630 --> 00:12:56,630
Yeah, that's right.
239
00:12:56,630 --> 00:12:58,630
Oh, oh, keep that head in there
240
00:12:58,630 --> 00:13:01,630
and you're not moving till I'm ready.
241
00:13:01,630 --> 00:13:06,630
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
242
00:13:06,630 --> 00:13:09,630
Oh, you cunt, sucker.
243
00:13:15,630 --> 00:13:21,630
Oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm gonna come eat you, cunt, sucker.
244
00:13:21,630 --> 00:13:23,630
Oh, oh!
245
00:13:23,630 --> 00:13:28,630
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
246
00:13:28,630 --> 00:13:34,750
[phone ringing]
247
00:13:34,750 --> 00:13:36,850
Who's that?
248
00:13:36,850 --> 00:13:41,550
I don't know, I'll get it.
249
00:13:41,550 --> 00:13:44,430
[phone ringing]
250
00:13:44,430 --> 00:13:45,950
Hello?
251
00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,730
Oh, hi Clara.
252
00:13:47,730 --> 00:13:49,790
I don't know, Jill's here.
253
00:13:49,790 --> 00:13:52,190
Huh?
254
00:13:52,190 --> 00:13:54,830
Were we invited to the Campbell's for dinner tonight?
255
00:13:54,830 --> 00:13:58,590
Christ, I forgot.
256
00:13:58,590 --> 00:14:00,690
Yeah, Clara, we're running a little late.
257
00:14:00,690 --> 00:14:03,370
Do you think we can meet you at the restaurant?
258
00:14:03,370 --> 00:14:07,030
Good, we'll be there in half an hour.
259
00:14:07,030 --> 00:14:10,410
Phew, that was some session.
260
00:14:10,410 --> 00:14:12,110
By the way, where'd you get Lucy's outfit?
261
00:14:12,110 --> 00:14:14,110
It's terrible.
262
00:14:14,110 --> 00:14:16,510
I know, it's a pit, but it's so forever
263
00:14:16,510 --> 00:14:17,610
because of the Polaroid.
264
00:14:17,610 --> 00:14:18,810
Come on, Jill, move it.
265
00:14:18,810 --> 00:14:21,450
Listen, we can get Lucy to clean up that mess later.
266
00:14:21,450 --> 00:14:24,350
The fuck I will!
267
00:14:24,350 --> 00:14:45,470
[music playing]
268
00:14:45,470 --> 00:14:48,450
This one looks like pizza's in the morning.
269
00:14:48,450 --> 00:14:50,370
You should look so good, Clara.
270
00:14:50,370 --> 00:14:51,650
How do you know it's a he?
271
00:14:51,650 --> 00:14:52,850
It could be a she.
272
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,410
Women's intuition.
273
00:14:54,410 --> 00:14:55,350
Now, where was I?
274
00:14:55,350 --> 00:14:56,650
Your new client.
275
00:14:56,650 --> 00:14:57,950
You would have to remind him.
276
00:14:57,950 --> 00:14:59,550
Oh, yeah, well, I think it's funny.
277
00:14:59,550 --> 00:15:02,050
Now, the product is, believe it or not,
278
00:15:02,050 --> 00:15:03,930
a frozen dessert for dogs.
279
00:15:03,930 --> 00:15:06,090
Great idea, frozen pussy.
280
00:15:06,090 --> 00:15:07,930
Yeah, melts in your mouth.
281
00:15:07,930 --> 00:15:09,130
Which it was.
282
00:15:09,130 --> 00:15:11,130
It would make my ad campaign a lot easier.
283
00:15:11,130 --> 00:15:15,130
Now, it's sort of an ice cream called Yummy,
284
00:15:15,130 --> 00:15:17,070
and it comes in three flavors.
285
00:15:17,070 --> 00:15:19,970
There's chocolate, vanilla, and blueberry.
286
00:15:19,970 --> 00:15:22,810
And I can't come up with a good campaign idea.
287
00:15:22,810 --> 00:15:25,310
I think that's our cue to give him some ideas.
288
00:15:25,310 --> 00:15:26,910
Well, first of all, Jack, you've got to get
289
00:15:26,910 --> 00:15:28,310
some sex into the campaign.
290
00:15:28,310 --> 00:15:29,210
Sex?
291
00:15:29,210 --> 00:15:31,050
Yeah, Jack, I've got it.
292
00:15:31,050 --> 00:15:34,750
50 gorgeous dogs dressed in bikinis and sunglasses,
293
00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:37,750
all gleefully laughing at Yummy.
294
00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:41,090
Yeah, and the jingle is, put some Yummy in your dog's tummy.
295
00:15:41,090 --> 00:15:43,290
Cha-cha-cha.
296
00:15:43,290 --> 00:15:44,990
I guess I deserved that, didn't I?
297
00:15:44,990 --> 00:15:45,790
Yeah, you did.
298
00:15:45,790 --> 00:15:48,670
Cha-cha-cha.
299
00:15:48,670 --> 00:15:51,610
Well, Jill, Jack tells me that you have an anniversary
300
00:15:51,610 --> 00:15:52,770
coming up soon.
301
00:15:52,770 --> 00:15:55,210
Anniversary?
302
00:15:55,210 --> 00:15:56,270
What anniversary?
303
00:15:56,270 --> 00:15:57,910
Our anniversary.
304
00:15:57,910 --> 00:15:59,110
You know, I thought it was men who
305
00:15:59,110 --> 00:16:01,110
were supposed to forget dates.
306
00:16:01,110 --> 00:16:04,010
We will have been together for a year on the 15th.
307
00:16:04,010 --> 00:16:06,750
Oh, your first wedding anniversary?
308
00:16:06,750 --> 00:16:08,190
How wonderful.
309
00:16:08,190 --> 00:16:09,830
That's a matter of opinion.
310
00:16:09,830 --> 00:16:11,330
I have a great idea.
311
00:16:11,330 --> 00:16:14,230
Why don't we celebrate your anniversary here on the 15th?
312
00:16:14,230 --> 00:16:15,630
Our treat.
313
00:16:15,630 --> 00:16:16,230
How about it?
314
00:16:16,230 --> 00:16:17,730
Well, that sounds great.
315
00:16:17,730 --> 00:16:18,670
How about it, Jill?
316
00:16:18,670 --> 00:16:21,070
I'd love to.
317
00:16:21,070 --> 00:16:24,330
Besides, Jack never passes over free meal.
318
00:16:24,330 --> 00:16:25,530
Why don't we go powder our noses
319
00:16:25,530 --> 00:16:28,770
and let the men talk dirty?
320
00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:31,510
What the hell do women do in the powder room anyway?
321
00:16:31,510 --> 00:16:33,110
Probably eat each other out.
322
00:16:33,110 --> 00:16:34,910
Is that why they put fresh lipstick on?
323
00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:37,990
Could be.
324
00:16:37,990 --> 00:16:40,090
Jack, I've got to tell you something.
325
00:16:40,090 --> 00:16:42,450
I've been dying to tell you about it all week.
326
00:16:42,450 --> 00:16:46,190
You rode your bike for the first time without training wheels.
327
00:16:46,190 --> 00:16:48,190
No, no, it's about Clara and I.
328
00:16:48,190 --> 00:16:50,230
You trained your bike to ride Clara.
329
00:16:50,230 --> 00:16:51,870
I'm serious, Jack.
330
00:16:51,870 --> 00:16:53,030
So am I.
331
00:16:53,030 --> 00:16:54,170
All right, all right.
332
00:16:54,170 --> 00:16:58,070
Look, you know that Clara and I have been married now three
333
00:16:58,070 --> 00:17:03,450
years, and well, the last year, our sex life
334
00:17:03,450 --> 00:17:05,470
hasn't been that great.
335
00:17:05,470 --> 00:17:07,150
I mean, we still love each other and all that,
336
00:17:07,150 --> 00:17:11,410
but it's just got a little boring, I guess.
337
00:17:11,410 --> 00:17:13,790
There's only so many positions that two people can get into,
338
00:17:13,790 --> 00:17:14,750
right?
339
00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:17,590
Anyway, now all that has changed.
340
00:17:17,590 --> 00:17:19,590
You bought a new sex manual.
341
00:17:19,590 --> 00:17:21,130
No, Jack.
342
00:17:21,130 --> 00:17:24,270
We're into swinging, you know, swinging with other couples.
343
00:17:24,270 --> 00:17:26,930
It's changed our entire sex life.
344
00:17:26,930 --> 00:17:28,470
It's fantastic.
345
00:17:28,470 --> 00:17:30,610
You and Jill have got to try it.
346
00:17:30,610 --> 00:17:31,510
Swinging?
347
00:17:31,510 --> 00:17:32,470
Yeah.
348
00:17:32,470 --> 00:17:33,470
Oh, come on, Jack.
349
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:38,070
This is the '70s, the decade of sexual freedom.
350
00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:40,990
You know, swinging, no holes barred.
351
00:17:40,990 --> 00:17:43,590
You and Jill have got to get with it.
352
00:17:43,590 --> 00:17:44,750
You'll love it, really.
353
00:17:44,750 --> 00:17:46,290
OK, fellas, clean up your act.
354
00:17:46,290 --> 00:17:49,630
The ladies are back.
355
00:17:49,630 --> 00:17:52,170
Jack, they've got fresh lipstick on.
356
00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:21,250
[GIGGLING]
357
00:18:21,250 --> 00:18:23,630
It's time to call him now.
358
00:18:23,630 --> 00:18:24,530
Now?
359
00:18:24,530 --> 00:18:25,690
Now!
360
00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:26,590
All right, already.
361
00:18:26,590 --> 00:18:28,430
You don't have to jump all over me.
362
00:18:28,430 --> 00:18:29,330
Shut up and dial.
363
00:18:29,380 --> 00:18:54,860
Jack that might be a phone call. Why don't you answer it and I'll get the drinks.
364
00:18:54,860 --> 00:18:57,860
You're dying. Shoot.
365
00:18:57,860 --> 00:18:59,860
Hello? Is this Jack?
366
00:18:59,860 --> 00:19:00,860
Well, that depends.
367
00:19:00,860 --> 00:19:01,860
If you're selling something, no.
368
00:19:01,860 --> 00:19:03,860
If you're giving something away, yes.
369
00:19:03,860 --> 00:19:07,860
Oh, I've definitely got something to give you.
370
00:19:07,860 --> 00:19:09,860
Guess what it is.
371
00:19:09,860 --> 00:19:11,860
Is it bigger than a red box?
372
00:19:11,860 --> 00:19:12,860
No.
373
00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:14,860
Look, I'm not into 20 questions.
374
00:19:14,860 --> 00:19:15,860
What is it?
375
00:19:15,860 --> 00:19:18,860
Oh, I've got love.
376
00:19:18,860 --> 00:19:20,860
Lots and lots of love.
377
00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:25,860
You don't say.
378
00:19:25,860 --> 00:19:28,860
I want your hot body against mine.
379
00:19:28,860 --> 00:19:37,860
I want your throbbing manhood to enter my deep, dark, hot, juicy tunnel of love.
380
00:19:37,860 --> 00:19:39,860
How does that sound?
381
00:19:39,860 --> 00:19:41,860
Sounds like a quote from Fanny Hill.
382
00:19:41,860 --> 00:19:46,860
Oh, I'm much better than Fanny Hill could ever be.
383
00:19:46,860 --> 00:19:53,860
Look, if you're in the neighborhood, why don't you drop up for a drink?
384
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:55,860
I think my wife would be glad to meet you.
385
00:19:55,860 --> 00:19:57,860
Oh, I don't want to meet your wife.
386
00:19:57,860 --> 00:20:00,860
I want to meet you.
387
00:20:00,860 --> 00:20:02,860
And we will meet very soon.
388
00:20:02,860 --> 00:20:05,860
Until then.
389
00:20:05,860 --> 00:20:20,860
[moaning]
390
00:20:20,860 --> 00:20:22,860
Darling, who is that?
391
00:20:22,860 --> 00:20:25,860
That was my first obscene phone call.
392
00:20:25,860 --> 00:20:27,860
I think we should celebrate.
393
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:28,860
Great.
394
00:20:28,860 --> 00:20:30,860
I think I'll call in Lucy.
395
00:20:30,860 --> 00:20:31,860
Oh, no.
396
00:20:31,860 --> 00:20:33,860
Let's not call in Lucy.
397
00:20:33,860 --> 00:20:35,860
She's too exhausting.
398
00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:38,860
Hey, uh, why don't you turn on the video?
399
00:20:38,860 --> 00:20:58,860
Good idea.
400
00:20:58,860 --> 00:21:11,860
[moaning]
401
00:21:11,860 --> 00:21:16,860
I wonder how those guys manage to keep hard-ons in all those movies.
402
00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:21,860
I wouldn't know. I don't have a cock.
403
00:21:21,860 --> 00:21:23,860
Jack, I'm sorry about tonight.
404
00:21:23,860 --> 00:21:26,860
I mean, about the anniversary, I almost blew it.
405
00:21:26,860 --> 00:21:27,860
Tell me about it.
406
00:21:27,860 --> 00:21:29,860
Are you mad at me?
407
00:21:29,860 --> 00:21:33,860
No, I'm not mad at you.
408
00:21:33,860 --> 00:21:34,860
What are you thinking?
409
00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:36,860
About what?
410
00:21:36,860 --> 00:21:37,860
Nothing.
411
00:21:37,860 --> 00:21:38,860
Nothing?
412
00:21:38,860 --> 00:21:40,860
I'll bet it's nothing.
413
00:21:40,860 --> 00:21:43,860
Come on, tell me about it.
414
00:21:43,860 --> 00:21:47,860
[laughing]
415
00:21:47,860 --> 00:21:49,860
All right, all right, I'll tell you, I'll tell you.
416
00:21:49,860 --> 00:21:51,860
If you just, if you'll quit it, will you?
417
00:21:51,860 --> 00:21:52,860
Don't ever do that again.
418
00:21:52,860 --> 00:21:54,860
Okay, let's have it.
419
00:21:54,860 --> 00:21:59,860
Okay, okay, we, well, it's been almost a year now
420
00:21:59,860 --> 00:22:03,860
and, uh, and we've tried a lot of different things,
421
00:22:03,860 --> 00:22:06,860
you know, with games and everything,
422
00:22:06,860 --> 00:22:10,860
with, well, it's just one thing we haven't tried, that's all.
423
00:22:10,860 --> 00:22:12,860
Like what?
424
00:22:12,860 --> 00:22:15,860
Uh, like swinging.
425
00:22:15,860 --> 00:22:17,860
Swinging? Like Tarzan and Jane?
426
00:22:17,860 --> 00:22:19,860
[singing]
427
00:22:19,860 --> 00:22:24,860
No, no, look, I mean, swinging, you know, like with other couples.
428
00:22:24,860 --> 00:22:27,860
Look, Jill, this is the '70s.
429
00:22:27,860 --> 00:22:30,860
This is the decade of sexual freedom, swinging.
430
00:22:30,860 --> 00:22:31,860
Okay.
431
00:22:31,860 --> 00:22:32,860
No holds barred.
432
00:22:32,860 --> 00:22:34,860
Look, there's time you got with it, Jill.
433
00:22:34,860 --> 00:22:35,860
Okay.
434
00:22:35,860 --> 00:22:36,860
Now, look, you're gonna love this.
435
00:22:36,860 --> 00:22:37,860
Now, what do you say?
436
00:22:37,860 --> 00:22:39,860
I said okay.
437
00:22:39,860 --> 00:22:41,860
Really?
438
00:22:41,860 --> 00:22:42,860
Why?
439
00:22:42,860 --> 00:22:44,860
Because you want to.
440
00:22:44,860 --> 00:22:47,860
What's the matter, chickening out?
441
00:22:47,860 --> 00:22:49,860
Ah.
442
00:22:49,860 --> 00:22:50,860
Right.
443
00:22:50,860 --> 00:22:51,860
Who's the couple?
444
00:22:51,860 --> 00:22:53,860
What do you have in mind?
445
00:22:53,860 --> 00:22:56,860
Oh, I, I didn't have anybody.
446
00:22:56,860 --> 00:23:01,860
Uh, well, I was talking to, uh, Pete
447
00:23:01,860 --> 00:23:03,860
and he said if you were willing.
448
00:23:03,860 --> 00:23:05,860
The Campbells?
449
00:23:05,860 --> 00:23:07,860
You're kidding.
450
00:23:07,860 --> 00:23:09,860
You're not kidding.
451
00:23:09,860 --> 00:23:11,860
How do you expect me to look you straight in the eye?
452
00:23:11,860 --> 00:23:13,860
I mean, they are our best friends.
453
00:23:13,860 --> 00:23:14,860
Well, you just have to.
454
00:23:14,860 --> 00:23:16,860
We're invited to their place for dinner tomorrow night.
455
00:23:16,860 --> 00:23:18,860
Tomorrow night?
456
00:23:18,860 --> 00:23:21,860
(upbeat jazz music)
457
00:23:21,860 --> 00:23:24,440
(upbeat music)
458
00:23:49,420 --> 00:23:51,260
- Lovely dinner, wasn't it?
459
00:23:51,260 --> 00:23:53,220
- Oh, you know it was really great.
460
00:23:53,220 --> 00:23:55,260
Clara, sensational.
461
00:23:55,260 --> 00:23:57,560
Pete, really, you've really got something to say.
462
00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:58,900
- I know, sensational.
463
00:23:58,900 --> 00:23:59,740
- Sensation dinner.
464
00:24:05,580 --> 00:24:07,280
- Anyone care for some coffee?
465
00:24:16,220 --> 00:24:17,580
- After dinner drinks.
466
00:24:17,580 --> 00:24:18,540
- I'd love one.
467
00:24:18,540 --> 00:24:20,640
(laughs)
468
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:29,140
Listen, I have a great idea.
469
00:24:31,220 --> 00:24:32,940
Why don't we all go into the other room
470
00:24:32,940 --> 00:24:36,020
where we can be more comfortable.
471
00:24:36,020 --> 00:24:38,220
We can have our drinks in there, all right?
472
00:24:38,220 --> 00:24:40,300
(crying)
473
00:24:40,300 --> 00:24:42,460
(panting)
474
00:24:42,460 --> 00:24:44,800
(footsteps)
475
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,140
(footsteps)
476
00:24:47,140 --> 00:24:49,300
(panting)
477
00:24:49,300 --> 00:24:52,300
[footsteps]
478
00:24:52,300 --> 00:25:19,300
[Sounds of water]
479
00:25:19,300 --> 00:25:20,300
Thank you.
480
00:25:20,300 --> 00:25:28,300
[Sounds of water]
481
00:25:28,300 --> 00:25:50,300
Well, uh, cheers everybody. Cheers.
482
00:25:50,300 --> 00:26:02,300
How about a joint? Pete? Yes.
483
00:26:02,300 --> 00:26:31,300
[Sounds of water]
484
00:26:31,300 --> 00:26:36,300
Well, what's everybody want to do?
485
00:26:36,300 --> 00:26:41,300
Well, uh, we could play some games.
486
00:26:41,300 --> 00:26:45,300
Yeah, do you have any playing cards?
487
00:26:45,300 --> 00:26:48,300
Sure, we could play some poker.
488
00:26:48,300 --> 00:26:53,300
Sounds good to me. Five card or seven card?
489
00:26:53,300 --> 00:27:02,300
Well, why don't we keep it simple for the girls. Let's make it, uh, one card draw, low card loses.
490
00:27:02,300 --> 00:27:06,300
Loses what?
491
00:27:06,300 --> 00:27:12,300
Well, uh, what do you want to do? Play for money or what?
492
00:27:12,300 --> 00:27:14,300
I like the or what.
493
00:27:14,300 --> 00:27:17,300
Oh, gutty, strip poker.
494
00:27:17,300 --> 00:27:21,300
No objections then? Strip poker it is.
495
00:27:21,300 --> 00:27:29,300
Uh, jewelry doesn't count.
496
00:27:29,300 --> 00:27:49,300
Ha ha, you're the first.
497
00:27:49,300 --> 00:27:52,300
An ace.
498
00:27:52,300 --> 00:27:54,300
What are aces in this game? Are aces high?
499
00:27:54,300 --> 00:27:56,300
High, we're playing high. It's yours.
500
00:27:56,300 --> 00:28:00,300
My luck.
501
00:28:00,300 --> 00:28:05,300
Here we go. Seven, a nine, a five.
502
00:28:05,300 --> 00:28:07,300
Big card queen, I'm winning on this one.
503
00:28:07,300 --> 00:28:11,300
I don't know, it seems to be my lucky day.
504
00:28:11,300 --> 00:28:14,300
Go ahead, put everybody staring at it.
505
00:28:14,300 --> 00:28:26,300
All right. King, seven, six, nine.
506
00:28:26,300 --> 00:28:29,300
Keep going.
507
00:28:29,300 --> 00:28:42,300
Just a time.
508
00:28:42,300 --> 00:28:45,300
What do we do now? We don't have any clothes left.
509
00:28:45,300 --> 00:28:49,300
Well, how about, uh, low card has to do whatever high card wants.
510
00:28:49,300 --> 00:28:51,300
For how long?
511
00:28:51,300 --> 00:28:53,300
Well, let's say 30 seconds.
512
00:28:53,300 --> 00:29:12,300
I guess I'll, I'll settle for a little kiss.
513
00:29:12,300 --> 00:29:19,300
Well, there wasn't 30 seconds, but, uh, that'll do.
514
00:29:19,300 --> 00:29:28,300
I guess I'll take one of those kisses, too.
515
00:29:28,300 --> 00:29:45,300
Why don't you kiss a little lower?
516
00:29:45,300 --> 00:30:04,300
My breasts.
517
00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:11,300
Okay, that's 30 seconds, uh, kids.
518
00:30:11,300 --> 00:30:16,300
Five, jack, nine, and an ace.
519
00:30:16,300 --> 00:30:45,300
Well, Clara, why don't you go down on me for a while?
520
00:30:45,300 --> 00:30:55,300
[music]
521
00:30:55,350 --> 00:31:18,470
♪ (melancholy music)
522
00:31:18,470 --> 00:31:21,070
- Ooh... ♪ (melancholy music)
523
00:31:21,070 --> 00:31:24,210
- Come on, Pete. ♪ (melancholy music)
524
00:31:24,210 --> 00:31:53,010
♪ (melancholy music)
525
00:31:53,060 --> 00:31:56,540
[MUSIC PLAYING]
526
00:31:56,540 --> 00:32:06,540
♪ ♪
527
00:32:06,540 --> 00:32:09,120
(upbeat music)
528
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:12,120
(upbeat jazz music)
529
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:15,120
(lively jazz music)
530
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:18,120
(upbeat jazz music)
531
00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:21,120
(upbeat jazz music)
532
00:32:21,120 --> 00:32:24,120
(smooth jazz music)
533
00:32:24,170 --> 00:32:27,170
(upbeat jazz music)
534
00:32:27,170 --> 00:32:30,170
(upbeat jazz music)
535
00:32:30,170 --> 00:32:33,170
(upbeat jazz music)
536
00:32:33,170 --> 00:32:36,170
(upbeat jazz music)
537
00:32:36,170 --> 00:32:39,170
(upbeat jazz music)
538
00:32:39,220 --> 00:32:42,220
(upbeat jazz music)
539
00:32:42,220 --> 00:32:45,220
(upbeat jazz music)
540
00:32:45,220 --> 00:33:14,220
[music]
541
00:33:14,220 --> 00:33:16,220
Hell with the cards. Come on.
542
00:33:16,220 --> 00:33:19,700
[THEME MUSIC]
543
00:33:19,700 --> 00:33:29,700
♪ ♪
544
00:33:29,700 --> 00:33:39,700
♪ ♪
545
00:33:39,700 --> 00:33:42,280
(upbeat music)
546
00:33:42,330 --> 00:33:52,330
♪ ♪
547
00:33:52,330 --> 00:33:57,230
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
548
00:33:57,230 --> 00:34:00,230
(upbeat jazz music)
549
00:34:00,230 --> 00:34:25,150
♪ (upbeat music)
550
00:34:25,150 --> 00:34:55,090
♪ (upbeat music)
551
00:34:55,090 --> 00:35:25,030
♪ (upbeat music)
552
00:35:25,030 --> 00:35:53,590
♪ (upbeat music)
553
00:35:53,590 --> 00:36:10,890
♪ (upbeat music)
554
00:36:10,890 --> 00:36:29,710
♪ (upbeat music)
555
00:36:29,710 --> 00:36:50,230
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
556
00:36:50,230 --> 00:37:15,450
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
557
00:37:15,450 --> 00:37:23,570
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
558
00:37:23,570 --> 00:37:53,470
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
559
00:37:53,470 --> 00:38:09,310
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
560
00:38:09,310 --> 00:38:26,870
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
561
00:38:26,870 --> 00:38:51,170
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
562
00:38:51,170 --> 00:38:54,670
- Oh...Oh Jack, I love you!
563
00:38:54,670 --> 00:38:55,470
- Huh?
564
00:38:55,470 --> 00:39:02,650
- I love you. Please, promise me I'll see you again, alone.
565
00:39:02,650 --> 00:39:04,510
Oh! - Sure, Carol. Sure.
566
00:39:04,510 --> 00:39:05,810
- Oh!
567
00:39:06,810 --> 00:39:09,890
- I love you, Jill. I've always loved you.
568
00:39:09,890 --> 00:39:11,450
- Are you just saying that, Pete?
569
00:39:11,450 --> 00:39:13,990
- No, no, I mean it. I really mean it.
570
00:39:13,990 --> 00:39:17,390
Promise me we can see each other again, alone.
571
00:39:17,390 --> 00:39:20,090
- Oh, fuck me, Pete. Fuck me!
572
00:39:20,090 --> 00:39:21,330
- All right.
573
00:39:21,330 --> 00:39:43,910
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
574
00:39:43,910 --> 00:40:03,490
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
575
00:40:03,490 --> 00:40:22,490
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
576
00:40:22,490 --> 00:40:24,150
- Oh...
577
00:40:24,150 --> 00:40:35,650
♪ (upbeat jazzy music)
578
00:40:35,650 --> 00:40:42,870
♪ (ominous music)
579
00:40:42,870 --> 00:40:44,670
- Well, I had a really nice time,
580
00:40:44,670 --> 00:40:46,830
but don't ask me to do it again.
581
00:40:46,830 --> 00:40:49,310
I love you! I've always loved you!
582
00:40:49,310 --> 00:40:51,410
Really?
583
00:40:51,410 --> 00:40:52,670
You gonna meet her tomorrow?
584
00:40:52,670 --> 00:40:55,110
- Yes. Yes, I'm going to meet her tomorrow.
585
00:40:55,110 --> 00:40:59,390
I'm going to meet her tomorrow night at the Commodore Hotel.
586
00:40:59,390 --> 00:41:02,390
- The Commodore? But hasn't that been closed for a few years?
587
00:41:02,390 --> 00:41:03,750
- That's right.
588
00:41:03,750 --> 00:41:06,990
- Hey, Jack, up at your ass!
589
00:41:06,990 --> 00:41:10,890
- Hey, Jill, next time we decide to swing,
590
00:41:10,890 --> 00:41:12,470
let's have a three-way.
591
00:41:12,470 --> 00:41:14,770
- I don't know. That usually ends up with one person
592
00:41:14,770 --> 00:41:16,570
watching the other two fucking...
593
00:41:16,570 --> 00:41:19,910
- So, what's the matter with a little good old-fashioned voyeurism?
594
00:41:19,910 --> 00:41:21,310
- That's not a three-way.
595
00:41:21,310 --> 00:41:23,610
You may as well just stand in the closet and watch.
596
00:41:23,610 --> 00:41:25,110
- Okay. - Okay, watch.
597
00:41:25,110 --> 00:41:26,770
- Okay, you can be in the closet and watch me.
598
00:41:26,770 --> 00:41:28,710
- Uh-uh, I'm not in the closet. You're in the closet.
599
00:41:28,710 --> 00:41:31,250
- Okay, we'll flip for it. Heads, I win, tails you lose.
600
00:41:31,250 --> 00:41:32,910
Heads? - Heads, you win.
601
00:41:32,910 --> 00:41:34,090
You're in the closet. - No, no, no.
602
00:41:34,090 --> 00:41:35,450
That's not the way it works. - Listen, honey,
603
00:41:35,450 --> 00:41:37,390
when you pick up the guy, make sure he's handsome
604
00:41:37,390 --> 00:41:40,150
and that he's a stranger. - What do you mean me pick up the guy?
605
00:41:40,150 --> 00:41:41,390
- Well, if you're gonna watch,
606
00:41:41,390 --> 00:41:43,630
you may as well pick up something you like.
607
00:41:43,630 --> 00:41:45,490
- Huh?
608
00:41:45,490 --> 00:41:47,130
Heads, I win to...
609
00:41:47,130 --> 00:41:54,070
♪
610
00:41:54,070 --> 00:41:57,070
[phone ringing]
611
00:41:58,870 --> 00:42:02,870
[phone ringing]
612
00:42:02,870 --> 00:42:04,410
- Bloomingdale's bag department.
613
00:42:04,410 --> 00:42:06,310
Which bag would you like to speak to?
614
00:42:06,310 --> 00:42:08,350
- Hello, Jill? I got one.
615
00:42:08,350 --> 00:42:10,550
- One what? - A guy.
616
00:42:10,550 --> 00:42:13,490
I got a guy, you know, threesome, closet.
617
00:42:13,490 --> 00:42:16,490
- Oh, what's he like?
618
00:42:16,490 --> 00:42:18,990
- Well, he's a stranger and he's handsome.
619
00:42:18,990 --> 00:42:20,630
- So is Jack the Ripper.
620
00:42:20,630 --> 00:42:23,630
- Look, this is a nice guy. You're gonna like him.
621
00:42:23,630 --> 00:42:25,230
Besides, he's hung like a horse.
622
00:42:25,230 --> 00:42:27,670
- How would you know? - He told me.
623
00:42:27,670 --> 00:42:30,970
- And you swallowed it? - No, but you will.
624
00:42:30,970 --> 00:42:32,770
Well, do you want to do it or not?
625
00:42:32,770 --> 00:42:35,170
- When's he gonna come? - In about a half an hour.
626
00:42:35,170 --> 00:42:36,710
- How are you gonna get into the closet?
627
00:42:36,710 --> 00:42:38,710
- Don't worry, I'll get there.
628
00:42:38,710 --> 00:43:00,190
[DOORBELL RINGING]
629
00:43:00,190 --> 00:43:01,490
Sister Hill residence?
630
00:43:01,490 --> 00:43:02,590
Certainly, yes.
631
00:43:02,590 --> 00:43:03,490
I'm Jill Hill.
632
00:43:03,490 --> 00:43:04,390
Come in.
633
00:43:04,390 --> 00:43:05,390
- What's your name?
634
00:43:05,390 --> 00:43:06,390
- I'm Tony.
635
00:43:06,390 --> 00:43:07,390
I'm from the phone company.
636
00:43:07,390 --> 00:43:08,390
- Oh, you're better than Jack described.
637
00:43:08,390 --> 00:43:09,390
- Jack?
638
00:43:09,390 --> 00:43:10,390
Who's Jack?
639
00:43:10,390 --> 00:43:11,390
- Aren't you a coy one.
640
00:43:11,390 --> 00:43:12,390
Let me take your jacket.
641
00:43:12,390 --> 00:43:13,390
- Hey, lady.
642
00:43:13,390 --> 00:43:14,390
Where do you want the connection?
643
00:43:14,390 --> 00:43:15,390
- Oh, the bedroom would be nice.
644
00:43:15,390 --> 00:43:16,390
Care for a drink?
645
00:43:16,390 --> 00:43:17,390
Scotch vodka?
646
00:43:17,390 --> 00:43:18,390
- No, thanks.
647
00:43:18,390 --> 00:43:19,390
I don't have much time.
648
00:43:19,390 --> 00:43:34,790
I got, uh, four more connections to make today.
649
00:43:34,790 --> 00:43:35,790
- Four more?
650
00:43:35,790 --> 00:43:40,790
How many did you do in one day?
651
00:43:40,790 --> 00:43:41,790
- About 15.
652
00:43:41,790 --> 00:43:42,790
- Oh, great.
653
00:43:42,790 --> 00:43:43,790
It's dead, aren't you?
654
00:43:43,790 --> 00:43:44,790
- Well, some of the ladies think so.
655
00:43:44,790 --> 00:43:45,790
Where's the bedroom?
656
00:43:45,790 --> 00:43:46,790
- All made here.
657
00:43:46,790 --> 00:43:57,190
- Oh, well, here's the bedroom.
658
00:43:57,190 --> 00:43:58,510
Let's make the connection.
659
00:43:58,510 --> 00:44:02,110
- Well, lady, where do you want it?
660
00:44:02,110 --> 00:44:05,030
- Oh, I want it right here.
661
00:44:05,030 --> 00:44:07,030
- Hey, are you kidding?
662
00:44:07,030 --> 00:44:12,870
- Well, if you don't like it there, you can always put it in my mouth.
663
00:44:12,870 --> 00:44:17,430
It won't be bashful.
664
00:44:17,430 --> 00:44:26,870
15 connections a day?
665
00:44:26,870 --> 00:44:46,350
- Oh, I'm sorry.
666
00:44:46,350 --> 00:45:03,330
It's not a dream.
667
00:45:03,330 --> 00:45:13,470
- It's not a dream.
668
00:45:13,470 --> 00:45:30,330
- Oh, I'm sorry.
669
00:45:30,330 --> 00:45:52,790
- Oh, baby, let's make the connection.
670
00:45:52,840 --> 00:45:55,420
(upbeat music)
671
00:45:55,420 --> 00:45:58,000
(upbeat music)
672
00:45:58,000 --> 00:46:00,580
(upbeat music)
673
00:46:00,580 --> 00:46:03,160
(upbeat music)
674
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:05,740
(upbeat music)
675
00:46:05,740 --> 00:46:08,320
(upbeat music)
676
00:46:08,320 --> 00:46:10,900
(upbeat music)
677
00:46:10,900 --> 00:46:13,480
(upbeat music)
678
00:46:13,480 --> 00:46:16,320
(heavy breathing)
679
00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:18,560
(grunting)
680
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:22,060
[GROANING]
681
00:46:46,060 --> 00:46:48,060
Oh, it's good.
682
00:46:48,060 --> 00:46:50,060
Stick it in deeper.
683
00:46:50,060 --> 00:46:51,060
Come on.
684
00:46:51,060 --> 00:46:52,060
Come on.
685
00:46:52,060 --> 00:46:53,060
More.
686
00:46:53,060 --> 00:46:54,060
Oh.
687
00:46:54,060 --> 00:46:55,060
Oh, it's good.
688
00:46:55,060 --> 00:46:57,560
[GROANING]
689
00:47:11,060 --> 00:47:12,060
Oh, yes.
690
00:47:12,060 --> 00:47:13,060
Come on.
691
00:47:13,060 --> 00:47:14,560
Come on.
692
00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:18,060
[GROANING]
693
00:47:18,060 --> 00:47:20,300
(grunting)
694
00:47:20,300 --> 00:47:22,460
(moaning)
695
00:47:22,460 --> 00:47:25,460
(breathing heavily)
696
00:47:25,460 --> 00:47:27,620
(panting)
697
00:47:27,620 --> 00:47:30,460
(heavy breathing)
698
00:47:30,460 --> 00:47:33,300
(heavy breathing)
699
00:47:33,300 --> 00:47:35,460
(panting)
700
00:48:02,940 --> 00:48:05,700
- Hey, Leigh, where's the bathroom?
701
00:48:07,140 --> 00:48:09,380
- Straight through there.
702
00:48:09,380 --> 00:48:10,220
- Thanks.
703
00:48:12,220 --> 00:48:14,740
- Jack, that was a hot one.
704
00:48:14,740 --> 00:48:16,320
Jack?
705
00:48:16,320 --> 00:48:17,160
Jack?
706
00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:20,120
- Jill?
707
00:48:21,600 --> 00:48:24,100
(horn honks)
708
00:48:28,760 --> 00:48:30,660
- Jack, where have you been?
709
00:48:30,660 --> 00:48:31,800
You missed all the action,
710
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:33,500
boy, was it hot.
711
00:48:33,500 --> 00:48:35,000
- What are you talking about?
712
00:48:35,000 --> 00:48:37,000
- The guy you sent over, he's in the bedroom.
713
00:48:37,000 --> 00:48:39,180
We just got through.
714
00:48:39,180 --> 00:48:40,340
- Are you crazy?
715
00:48:40,340 --> 00:48:41,340
I just left him.
716
00:48:41,340 --> 00:48:44,180
He'll be here in a few minutes.
717
00:48:45,480 --> 00:48:48,480
- Well then, who's that in the bedroom?
718
00:48:50,120 --> 00:48:52,220
- Yeah, mister, just who the hell are you?
719
00:48:52,220 --> 00:48:54,160
- Hey, listen, mister, I don't want no trouble now.
720
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:56,320
Just came to put in the extension phone, cool?
721
00:48:56,320 --> 00:48:57,160
- Cool?
722
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:00,860
Extension phone?
723
00:49:00,860 --> 00:49:03,560
- Uh-oh, I got a wrong number.
724
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:04,560
- Uh-huh.
725
00:49:04,560 --> 00:49:06,960
(soft music)
726
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:09,380
(soft music)
727
00:49:09,380 --> 00:49:11,800
(soft music)
728
00:49:11,800 --> 00:49:39,800
[ Music ]
729
00:49:40,300 --> 00:49:45,800
All right, enough fun and games, we've got work to do.
730
00:49:45,800 --> 00:49:47,800
Oh, it's just getting into it.
731
00:49:47,800 --> 00:49:49,800
Shut up and give me the phone.
732
00:49:49,800 --> 00:49:52,800
Um, shut up and give me the phone.
733
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:55,800
Here's your damn phone.
734
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:59,800
One day, dearie, it's gonna be knuckle sandwich for you.
735
00:50:02,800 --> 00:50:06,800
Here's one, nymphal wife hung hubby.
736
00:50:06,800 --> 00:50:13,800
Long Island couple would like to swing and eat with other couples or by gals.
737
00:50:13,800 --> 00:50:15,800
[ Phone Ringing ]
738
00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:18,800
Ajax funeral parlor, you stiff 'em, we stuff 'em.
739
00:50:18,800 --> 00:50:21,800
Hello, is this Jack the twat teaser?
740
00:50:21,800 --> 00:50:23,800
Depends on whose twat is being teased.
741
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:25,800
Shut up, titsucker.
742
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:31,800
When we meet, and that will be soon, I'm going to smother your face with my hot pussy.
743
00:50:31,800 --> 00:50:34,800
I'm going to drown you in my juices.
744
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:37,800
What a way to go, who is this anyway?
745
00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:40,800
Never mind, you'll know soon enough.
746
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:48,800
Then you better start saving up all that hot cum because I'm going to suck your well dry.
747
00:50:48,800 --> 00:50:50,800
Oh.
748
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:55,800
Is that the same girl?
749
00:50:55,800 --> 00:50:57,800
No, that was a different one.
750
00:50:57,800 --> 00:50:59,800
I wonder where they get my phone number.
751
00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:01,800
Probably off the bathroom walls.
752
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:05,800
Do we really have to send photographs for these ads?
753
00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:07,800
Probably.
754
00:51:07,800 --> 00:51:09,800
I think they really want to know what they're getting into.
755
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:11,800
Yeah, well, we'd like to know what we're getting into.
756
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:14,800
I mean, they make some of them look so attractive.
757
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:16,800
Well, there's only one way to find out.
758
00:51:16,800 --> 00:51:19,800
Let's answer them. Read on, darling.
759
00:51:19,800 --> 00:51:21,800
Here's one.
760
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:26,800
Attractive young at heart couple looking for same to waltz in the hay
761
00:51:26,800 --> 00:51:28,800
with a groovy hip type.
762
00:51:28,800 --> 00:51:30,800
Your place or ours.
763
00:51:30,800 --> 00:51:33,800
Please, no painter professionals.
764
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:35,800
Young at heart couple.
765
00:51:35,800 --> 00:51:38,800
Well, here we are, darlings.
766
00:51:40,800 --> 00:51:43,800
Jolly Stud would like to ring your wife's bells.
767
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:47,800
Have gifted crotch guaranteed to make her merry.
768
00:51:47,800 --> 00:51:52,800
Ho, ho, ho, little girl. Can Santa sniff your pussy?
769
00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:59,800
Wife is gorgeous nympho, hubby mature, white male, oral expert.
770
00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:06,040
Oh, yeah, so this must be the little lady.
771
00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:08,680
Oral expert?
772
00:52:08,680 --> 00:52:15,640
Masculine and feminine couple orally inclined into all nationalities, French, Greek and
773
00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:16,640
English.
774
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:20,640
Oh, here's Jack.
775
00:52:20,640 --> 00:52:23,440
Oh, God.
776
00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:24,440
What's the matter, buddy?
777
00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:25,440
You don't like blondes?
778
00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:27,800
No, no, it's not that.
779
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:30,160
It's just that I don't like drag queens.
780
00:52:30,160 --> 00:52:32,680
Hey, motherfucker, who you calling a drag queen?
781
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:36,080
Tell him, Mac, she is not a drag queen.
782
00:52:36,080 --> 00:52:37,080
She's a real lady.
783
00:52:37,080 --> 00:52:41,320
Come on, honey, we've been insulted in better places than this.
784
00:52:41,320 --> 00:52:45,440
Young athletic couple would love to perform at your place.
785
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:51,120
Hi there, I am Roger and this is Rosetta.
786
00:52:51,120 --> 00:52:54,680
Oh, hi, I'm Jack and this is Jill.
787
00:52:54,680 --> 00:52:57,400
Hey, nice place you have here.
788
00:52:57,400 --> 00:52:58,400
What do you think Rosetta?
789
00:52:58,400 --> 00:52:59,400
Ay, ay, ay, Carmen Miranda.
790
00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:00,400
I think we should set up over here, like the room.
791
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:01,400
Great, great.
792
00:53:01,400 --> 00:53:08,320
Rosetta, listen, you set up the lights and I'll do all the rest, all right?
793
00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:09,320
Excuse me.
794
00:53:09,320 --> 00:53:12,440
Excuse me, but just what is it that you're setting up?
795
00:53:12,440 --> 00:53:17,800
Why, our stage, of course, all the world is a stage.
796
00:53:17,800 --> 00:53:18,800
I heard that before.
797
00:53:18,800 --> 00:53:22,800
You don't need a stage, we have a very beautiful bedroom.
798
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:27,800
Listen, maybe for you the bedroom, but for us the stage, it is our life.
799
00:53:27,800 --> 00:53:32,560
Five minutes of showtime, five minutes of showtime, pitch the ladder, bring it to stomp,
800
00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:33,560
quick.
801
00:53:33,560 --> 00:53:37,040
No, no, no, wait just a damn minute here, aren't you people here to swing?
802
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:39,560
Why, of course not.
803
00:53:39,560 --> 00:53:43,200
We are actors, we're here to put on a show, did you not read the ad?
804
00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:46,400
We live to perform.
805
00:53:46,400 --> 00:53:47,400
Perform what?
806
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:53,720
One of the great classics of all time, Romeo and Juliet.
807
00:53:53,720 --> 00:53:56,720
One minute to showtime.
808
00:53:56,720 --> 00:53:59,720
I told you to do your thing.
809
00:53:59,720 --> 00:54:00,720
What do you think?
810
00:54:00,720 --> 00:54:01,720
I don't think we have much choice at this point.
811
00:54:01,720 --> 00:54:02,720
Here is your souvenir program.
812
00:54:02,720 --> 00:54:03,720
Well, thank you very much.
813
00:54:03,720 --> 00:54:08,720
And that will be two dollars apiece, but you can pay me after the show.
814
00:54:08,720 --> 00:54:09,720
Rosetta, hit the lights.
815
00:54:09,720 --> 00:54:10,720
You got it.
816
00:54:10,720 --> 00:54:29,960
Romeo, oh Romeo, wherefore art thou, my sweet Romeo?
817
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:33,600
I stand before thee, Juliet, my love.
818
00:54:33,600 --> 00:54:34,600
Parting was a sweet sorrow.
819
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:35,600
Oh Romeo, kiss me with thy ruby-guay-blee.
820
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:47,640
I will kiss thee hard, as if I plucked up kisses by the roots that grill upon thy lips.
821
00:54:47,640 --> 00:54:56,760
Oh Romeo, your kisses are sweeter than wine.
822
00:54:56,760 --> 00:55:04,760
Ark, do mine eyes deceive me, or do I see two pounds, I mean mounds of flesh heaving
823
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:06,760
in passionate ecstasy?
824
00:55:06,760 --> 00:55:11,880
There is no deception, my sweet Romeo.
825
00:55:11,880 --> 00:55:16,040
These breaths, they heal for two.
826
00:55:16,040 --> 00:55:21,440
Oh, what I would give to run mine hands over thy breasts.
827
00:55:21,440 --> 00:55:25,520
Take them, ravish them, suck them.
828
00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:34,640
Oh, see how my nipples take it hard with the touch of thy song.
829
00:55:34,640 --> 00:55:38,680
Oh, suck them, you fool.
830
00:55:38,680 --> 00:55:41,880
And this man was wise enough to play the fool.
831
00:55:41,880 --> 00:55:43,920
Oh Romeo.
832
00:55:43,920 --> 00:55:59,240
Now, Juliet, it is time for thy ruby-wet lips to kiss thy youthful body.
833
00:55:59,240 --> 00:56:10,240
Kiss the nipples, kiss my nipples, kiss my armpits, kiss me all over, kiss my back, all
834
00:56:10,240 --> 00:56:16,760
thy lips of the greatest, thy tongue the warmest, pull down my entights, pull down and kiss
835
00:56:16,760 --> 00:56:19,760
thy body.
836
00:56:19,760 --> 00:56:29,120
I have heard the cup that is the trumpet to the morn, doth with his lofty and shriek
837
00:56:29,120 --> 00:56:38,000
sound his throat, acquit the god of death.
838
00:56:38,000 --> 00:56:40,000
The lady doth protest too much mew-inks.
839
00:56:40,000 --> 00:56:53,720
The ruby-wet lips suck on my cock, oh Juliet, Juliet, you're so beautiful.
840
00:56:53,720 --> 00:57:21,640
Juliet, open my mound of joy and receive my kiss.
841
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:30,440
Juliet, open my mound of joy and receive the gifts I bear.
842
00:57:30,440 --> 00:57:44,880
Oh Juliet, my pussy is the softest and the sweetest of all the land, oh Romeo, my tits
843
00:57:44,880 --> 00:57:50,960
are as smooth as, my skin is like peaches and cream, you're so beautiful.
844
00:57:50,960 --> 00:58:04,480
Oh Juliet, you feel my every thrust in my soft body, oh Juliet, you see my passion rising
845
00:58:04,480 --> 00:58:25,520
and heaving in my sweet cunt, oh Romeo, oh that cock, oh Juliet, take my every thrust,
846
00:58:25,520 --> 00:58:46,600
oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo,
847
00:58:46,600 --> 00:59:15,920
oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
848
00:59:15,920 --> 00:59:44,920
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
849
00:59:44,920 --> 01:00:13,240
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
850
01:00:13,240 --> 01:00:42,200
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
851
01:00:42,200 --> 01:01:10,600
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
852
01:01:10,600 --> 01:01:38,600
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo,
853
01:01:38,600 --> 01:02:04,040
oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
854
01:02:04,040 --> 01:02:29,480
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
855
01:02:29,480 --> 01:02:58,440
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
856
01:02:58,440 --> 01:03:28,360
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
857
01:03:28,360 --> 01:03:57,320
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
858
01:03:57,320 --> 01:04:25,640
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
859
01:04:25,640 --> 01:04:53,560
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
860
01:04:53,560 --> 01:05:21,560
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
861
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:42,520
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
862
01:05:42,520 --> 01:06:10,840
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
863
01:06:10,840 --> 01:06:40,280
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
864
01:06:40,280 --> 01:07:08,200
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
865
01:07:08,200 --> 01:07:34,920
Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh Romeo, oh
866
01:07:34,920 --> 01:07:38,900
[MUSIC PLAYING]
867
01:07:38,900 --> 01:07:41,400
[MUSIC PLAYING]
868
01:07:41,400 --> 01:07:43,880
Oh, for the weird old cough.
869
01:07:43,880 --> 01:07:44,380
Come here.
870
01:07:44,380 --> 01:07:45,880
Oh.
871
01:07:45,880 --> 01:07:46,860
Oh.
872
01:07:46,860 --> 01:07:48,860
[MUSIC PLAYING]
873
01:07:48,860 --> 01:07:50,860
Hey, my man.
874
01:07:50,860 --> 01:07:53,360
Well, it's muppet time now.
875
01:07:53,360 --> 01:07:54,360
Oh.
876
01:07:54,360 --> 01:07:56,860
[MUSIC PLAYING]
877
01:07:56,860 --> 01:07:58,500
- Come with me.
878
01:07:58,500 --> 01:08:00,340
- No.
879
01:08:00,340 --> 01:08:01,700
(dog barks)
880
01:08:01,700 --> 01:08:06,020
♪ (suspenseful music)
881
01:08:06,020 --> 01:08:09,220
(dog barks)
882
01:08:09,220 --> 01:08:11,480
(dog barks)
883
01:08:11,480 --> 01:08:14,980
(train whistle blows)
884
01:08:14,980 --> 01:08:22,160
♪ (suspenseful music)
885
01:08:22,160 --> 01:08:25,400
♪ (soft music)
886
01:08:25,400 --> 01:08:28,740
- Get that cock nice and big.
887
01:08:28,740 --> 01:08:30,740
For me.
888
01:08:30,740 --> 01:08:32,540
Look at my pussy.
889
01:08:32,540 --> 01:08:35,080
See how wet it is?
890
01:08:35,080 --> 01:08:37,580
A little wet because of you.
891
01:08:37,580 --> 01:08:39,620
You're such a good slave.
892
01:08:39,620 --> 01:08:42,020
You sucked me out.
893
01:08:42,020 --> 01:08:44,980
Made me feel good.
894
01:08:44,980 --> 01:08:46,980
I love your cock.
895
01:08:46,980 --> 01:08:49,480
Now you've given me a free show.
896
01:08:49,480 --> 01:08:53,320
What more can I ask for for my anniversary?
897
01:08:53,320 --> 01:08:55,220
Beautiful.
898
01:08:55,220 --> 01:08:57,400
Touch your balls too, a little bit.
899
01:08:57,400 --> 01:08:59,800
Come on, jiggle those balls.
900
01:08:59,800 --> 01:09:02,640
♪ (soft music)
901
01:09:02,640 --> 01:09:04,440
That's what makes me cum.
902
01:09:04,440 --> 01:09:06,940
- Oh yes, it's a thing.
903
01:09:06,940 --> 01:09:13,940
♪ (soft music)
904
01:09:13,940 --> 01:09:18,420
- Oh, oh, oh.
905
01:09:18,420 --> 01:09:20,380
How about that?
906
01:09:20,380 --> 01:09:24,920
♪ (soft music)
907
01:09:24,920 --> 01:09:26,920
- Mmm!
908
01:09:26,920 --> 01:09:33,840
♪ (soft music)
909
01:09:33,840 --> 01:09:35,840
Oh!
910
01:09:35,840 --> 01:09:39,340
♪ (soft music)
911
01:09:39,340 --> 01:09:41,340
Oh!
912
01:09:41,340 --> 01:09:43,340
Ah!
913
01:09:43,340 --> 01:09:50,980
♪ (soft music)
914
01:09:50,980 --> 01:09:54,720
I think I'm gonna put my finger in your asshole if you're good.
915
01:09:54,720 --> 01:09:57,520
As a reward.
916
01:09:57,520 --> 01:09:59,200
Would you like that?
917
01:09:59,200 --> 01:10:02,300
Don't say anything, just nod.
918
01:10:02,300 --> 01:10:04,060
Can you rub that cock?
919
01:10:04,060 --> 01:10:06,060
Make it big.
920
01:10:06,060 --> 01:10:16,080
♪ (soft music)
921
01:10:16,080 --> 01:10:18,080
- Oh!
922
01:10:18,080 --> 01:10:25,200
♪ (soft music)
923
01:10:25,200 --> 01:10:27,200
- Ah!
924
01:10:27,200 --> 01:10:29,640
♪ (soft music)
925
01:10:29,640 --> 01:10:31,640
Ah!
926
01:10:31,640 --> 01:10:33,640
Ah!
927
01:10:33,640 --> 01:10:53,680
♪ (soft music)
928
01:10:53,680 --> 01:11:10,780
♪ (soft music)
929
01:11:10,780 --> 01:11:24,560
♪ (soft music)
930
01:11:24,560 --> 01:11:26,560
- Ah!
931
01:11:26,560 --> 01:11:47,340
♪ (soft music)
932
01:11:47,340 --> 01:11:58,480
♪ (soft music)
933
01:11:58,480 --> 01:12:00,480
- Oh!
934
01:12:00,480 --> 01:12:02,480
Ah!
935
01:12:02,480 --> 01:12:04,480
Ah!
936
01:12:04,480 --> 01:12:06,480
Ah!
937
01:12:06,480 --> 01:12:08,480
Oh!
938
01:12:08,480 --> 01:12:10,480
Oh!
939
01:12:10,480 --> 01:12:26,160
♪ (soft music)
940
01:12:26,160 --> 01:12:29,940
- By the way, Jack, a message from Jill.
941
01:12:29,940 --> 01:12:33,200
- Happy anniversary! - Happy anniversary!
942
01:12:33,200 --> 01:12:35,980
- And I thought she forgot.
943
01:12:35,980 --> 01:12:48,180
♪ (soft music)
944
01:12:48,180 --> 01:12:52,180
- Okay. - Happy anniversary!
945
01:12:52,180 --> 01:12:54,180
- What is this, a Polish wedding?
946
01:12:54,180 --> 01:12:56,180
- Come on, come on, be romantic.
947
01:12:56,180 --> 01:12:57,320
Take that.
948
01:12:57,320 --> 01:12:59,320
Oh, all right.
949
01:12:59,320 --> 01:13:01,960
- Well, if you like that, we can go further.
950
01:13:01,960 --> 01:13:04,660
♪ (soft music)
951
01:13:04,660 --> 01:13:07,760
- Well, Jack, what have you got to say after a year?
952
01:13:07,760 --> 01:13:09,760
- Well, when we first got together,
953
01:13:09,760 --> 01:13:13,300
we decided to give it a year and then evaluate the situation.
954
01:13:13,300 --> 01:13:15,040
- Well?
955
01:13:15,040 --> 01:13:18,280
- Well, on a scale of one to ten,
956
01:13:18,280 --> 01:13:20,680
I think it was a ten.
957
01:13:20,680 --> 01:13:22,880
- Oh! (both laugh)
958
01:13:22,880 --> 01:13:24,880
- What's your evaluation, Jill?
959
01:13:24,880 --> 01:13:27,620
- Well, I couldn't really put it on a scale.
960
01:13:27,620 --> 01:13:31,580
From a woman's point of view, I've never been happier.
961
01:13:31,580 --> 01:13:33,560
- I'd call that a real success story.
962
01:13:33,560 --> 01:13:35,320
- So would I.
963
01:13:35,320 --> 01:13:38,620
- Well, Jack, what do you want to do now?
964
01:13:38,620 --> 01:13:40,800
- I'm willing if you are.
965
01:13:40,800 --> 01:13:42,800
- I'm willing.
966
01:13:44,400 --> 01:13:46,240
- Well, that settles it.
967
01:13:46,240 --> 01:13:48,040
Pete, will you be my best man?
968
01:13:48,040 --> 01:13:49,200
- Huh?
969
01:13:49,200 --> 01:13:50,840
What do you mean, best man?
970
01:13:50,840 --> 01:13:53,000
- We're getting married. - Getting married?
971
01:13:53,000 --> 01:13:54,800
- Wait a minute, stop the music.
972
01:13:54,800 --> 01:13:56,920
You mean all this time you were never legally married?
973
01:13:56,920 --> 01:14:00,080
- That's right, we were living in sin.
974
01:14:00,080 --> 01:14:03,420
And I think it was one of the best games we ever played.
975
01:14:03,420 --> 01:14:05,520
- Don't you think so?
976
01:14:05,520 --> 01:14:08,720
- I would think so, so far.
977
01:14:08,720 --> 01:14:11,600
- What's that supposed to mean?
978
01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:12,700
- You'll see.
979
01:14:12,700 --> 01:14:15,460
(dramatic music)
980
01:14:15,460 --> 01:14:18,040
(upbeat music)
981
01:14:18,040 --> 01:14:20,620
(upbeat music)
982
01:14:20,620 --> 01:14:23,200
(upbeat music)
983
01:14:23,200 --> 01:14:25,200
[MUSIC]
984
01:14:25,200 --> 01:14:35,200
[BLANK_AUDIO]
69113
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