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1
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So he takes a nap around 11:00,
2
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And another one around 3:00. Lucky him.
3
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Glug, glug, glug.
4
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And all the emergency numbers...
5
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oh, and if you want to take him outside,
6
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Don't forget to put his little beanie hat on.
7
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He looks so adorable.
8
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Has anyone, uh, seen my other shoe?
9
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Ah, is that what i'm sitting on?
10
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I knew it wasn't one of my usual rubber toys.
11
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Brian, are you listening to me?
12
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Yeah, feeding time,
13
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Nap time, beanie hat.
14
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I got it.
15
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He's going to be fine, lindsay.
16
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I know he will be.
17
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And i appreciate you doing this on such short notice.
18
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But now that i have to go back to work,
19
00:00:43,425 --> 00:00:45,428
I have to attend this damn teachers' conference.
20
00:00:45,428 --> 00:00:48,932
Well, maybe you'll meet a nice lady p.E. Teacher.
21
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Don't worry.
22
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I'll keep an eye on him too.
23
00:00:51,936 --> 00:00:53,939
I don't need you to keep an eye on him.
24
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I meant you.
25
00:00:58,445 --> 00:01:00,448
I'm his father, i'm not going to fuck it up.
26
00:01:02,450 --> 00:01:04,953
Would you please tell them to give me some credit? I am.
27
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That's why i'm leaving him in your care. Bullshit.
28
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You're leaving him with me
29
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Because melanie's going to go see heryentamother
30
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In miami and won't be back till sunday.
31
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Here's my number at the conference.
32
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There you go.
33
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He's going to be fine, mom.
34
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I know, dad.
35
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Love you.
36
00:01:25,980 --> 00:01:28,484
Are you ready to spend a weekend
37
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With your old man, sonny-Boy?
38
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Hmm?
39
00:01:35,493 --> 00:01:36,995
I'm off. Whoa, whoa, michael!
40
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You want to give me a hand with some of this stuff, please?
41
00:01:38,997 --> 00:01:41,000
Come on, i know there's a guest room up here somewhere.
42
00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:44,003
I'm sorry, i was going to move some of my stuff.
43
00:01:44,003 --> 00:01:46,006
So, when's he arriving? 7:30.
44
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If the plane's on time.
45
00:01:50,011 --> 00:01:51,013
You must be pretty excited.
46
00:01:51,514 --> 00:01:53,015
I've been counting the days all summer.
47
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That's a long time.
48
00:01:56,521 --> 00:01:59,023
Yeah, well, oregon's a long way away.
49
00:01:59,525 --> 00:02:01,527
Thank god for e-Mail. I'm on his buddy list.
50
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God, you're going to love my son. Cool.
51
00:02:03,029 --> 00:02:05,532
You should see this kid. He-He's amazing.
52
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He's smart, he's funny.
53
00:02:06,533 --> 00:02:09,537
He... h-He plays tenor sax, he can do web sites,
54
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He can... he juggles.
55
00:02:11,039 --> 00:02:13,542
Great. When does he find time for brain surgery?
56
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Ah... he sounds marvellous.
57
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He is.
58
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He's going to love you too.
59
00:02:20,051 --> 00:02:22,053
How do you know that?
60
00:02:22,053 --> 00:02:23,055
Who wouldn't?
61
00:02:25,559 --> 00:02:27,560
I have not seen these before.
62
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Well one day, if you're lucky,
63
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You just might.
64
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Hey!
65
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Have a good day at work. You too.
66
00:02:43,081 --> 00:02:45,585
Couldn't you have worn something a little more...
67
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discreet? As long as your erogenous zones are covered,
68
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You're safely in the conservative column.
69
00:02:52,593 --> 00:02:56,097
Besides, i tried straight drag, "saw the light".
70
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Thank you, god.
71
00:02:58,601 --> 00:03:00,103
Now...
72
00:03:00,103 --> 00:03:02,105
what're you in the mood for, for lunch?
73
00:03:02,105 --> 00:03:03,608
How about, uh, sushi?
74
00:03:03,608 --> 00:03:06,111
Ah, just what i need, food poisoning.
75
00:03:06,111 --> 00:03:07,613
Okay, indian?
76
00:03:07,613 --> 00:03:09,114
Heartburn.
77
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Ribs? Heart attack.
78
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Y-You know what i could really go for?
79
00:03:12,619 --> 00:03:14,622
Tuna fish on white bread, double mayo,
80
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Potato chips, coleslaw, vanilla pudding.
81
00:03:17,125 --> 00:03:18,627
That's what you have every day. Well...
82
00:03:19,127 --> 00:03:20,630
ted?
83
00:03:20,630 --> 00:03:21,631
Ted schmidt?
84
00:03:22,633 --> 00:03:24,134
Dale wexler? Yeah.
85
00:03:24,134 --> 00:03:25,135
Yeah, how long's it been?
86
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Ah... years.
87
00:03:27,138 --> 00:03:29,641
Ah...
88
00:03:29,641 --> 00:03:32,144
oh, uh, this is my friend, emmett.
89
00:03:32,144 --> 00:03:33,646
He's not from these parts.
90
00:03:33,646 --> 00:03:34,648
Nice to meet you.
91
00:03:35,148 --> 00:03:35,649
You too.
92
00:03:37,652 --> 00:03:39,655
So, uh, last thing i heard
93
00:03:40,155 --> 00:03:41,657
You were setting up offices in baltimore?
94
00:03:41,657 --> 00:03:43,660
And cincinnati. Now here.
95
00:03:43,660 --> 00:03:44,661
It's great, you're doing so well.
96
00:03:44,661 --> 00:03:46,163
I mean, we all knew you would, of course.
97
00:03:46,163 --> 00:03:48,667
Yeah, life's been good. How about you?
98
00:03:48,667 --> 00:03:50,167
Yeah, i'm still working for the same firm.
99
00:03:50,167 --> 00:03:52,170
Christ, i thought you would have left wertschafter by now.
100
00:03:52,170 --> 00:03:53,672
Yeah, well, his personal appeal
101
00:03:53,672 --> 00:03:56,676
And selfless generosity, they're just hard to resist.
102
00:03:57,177 --> 00:03:58,679
Listen, i, uh, got to meet a client for lunch,
103
00:03:58,679 --> 00:04:00,682
This new indonesian place. You tried it?
104
00:04:00,682 --> 00:04:02,183
Him?
105
00:04:02,183 --> 00:04:05,187
Um, no. Not yet, but i-I'm meaning to.
106
00:04:05,187 --> 00:04:06,189
Nice to see you.
107
00:04:06,690 --> 00:04:07,190
Yeah, same here.
108
00:04:10,695 --> 00:04:11,696
Who wasthat?
109
00:04:11,696 --> 00:04:14,199
Ah, someone i went to business school with.
110
00:04:14,199 --> 00:04:15,701
Hmm, he's cute.
111
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I thought so too.
112
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I hear he's a real mover.
113
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Became a millionaire before he was 30.
114
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Wonder what his secret is.
115
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I'll probably never know.
116
00:04:25,715 --> 00:04:28,719
And apparently this 12-Yearold juggling,
117
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Jazz-Playing web-Master...
118
00:04:30,721 --> 00:04:32,222
what if he hates me?
119
00:04:32,723 --> 00:04:34,726
Who?
120
00:04:34,726 --> 00:04:36,728
David's son. Fuck him, he's just a kid.
121
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He's not just a kid, he's david's son.
122
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And you know what that means.
123
00:04:41,234 --> 00:04:42,737
You're the wicked stepmother.
124
00:04:42,737 --> 00:04:43,738
What?
125
00:04:43,738 --> 00:04:45,239
You're the wicked stepmother.
126
00:04:45,239 --> 00:04:46,742
Like in fairy tales.
127
00:04:48,243 --> 00:04:50,246
Well, why don't you get your fairy tail back to work.
128
00:04:50,246 --> 00:04:52,249
Isn't there a toilet you need to spit-Shine?
129
00:04:52,249 --> 00:04:53,249
Don't be so pathetic, mikey.
130
00:04:53,249 --> 00:04:54,251
He's not going to hate you.
131
00:04:54,752 --> 00:04:55,753
Well, what makes you so sure?
132
00:04:55,753 --> 00:04:57,255
I'm crazy about you.
133
00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:01,260
What is with you?
134
00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:02,763
He's right.
135
00:05:02,763 --> 00:05:04,264
I'm... i'm the stepmother.
136
00:05:04,264 --> 00:05:06,267
I'm... me, a stepmother.
137
00:05:06,267 --> 00:05:08,771
Who's a stepmother?
138
00:05:08,771 --> 00:05:09,772
Mikey.
139
00:05:11,274 --> 00:05:13,276
David's son's coming in for the weekend.
140
00:05:13,276 --> 00:05:14,277
Huh?
141
00:05:14,778 --> 00:05:16,279
What do you think of that?
142
00:05:16,279 --> 00:05:18,783
Look at you, you're so beautiful.
143
00:05:18,783 --> 00:05:20,285
I swear to god, brian,
144
00:05:20,285 --> 00:05:22,789
He's getting to look more like you every day, yes.
145
00:05:22,789 --> 00:05:24,791
Yeah, well, we're still working on the hair.
146
00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:25,793
Where's lindsay?
147
00:05:26,293 --> 00:05:27,294
She's at a teachers' conference,
148
00:05:27,294 --> 00:05:29,798
So i'm watching him for the weekend.
149
00:05:30,298 --> 00:05:31,299
You?
150
00:05:31,299 --> 00:05:33,803
I'd be afraid to let you water my plants.
151
00:05:33,803 --> 00:05:35,304
Do you even know what a huggie is?
152
00:05:35,304 --> 00:05:37,307
Here's a hint, it's not a sexual position.
153
00:05:37,307 --> 00:05:39,810
Of course i do. It's, um, uh...
154
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a diaper!
155
00:05:42,313 --> 00:05:44,316
Oh... yeah,
156
00:05:44,316 --> 00:05:46,319
I know all about diapers.
157
00:05:46,319 --> 00:05:47,821
I was fucking this guy for a while,
158
00:05:47,821 --> 00:05:49,824
Ceo of a big corporation.
159
00:05:50,324 --> 00:05:52,828
He used to like to wear diapers when i spanked him.
160
00:05:53,328 --> 00:05:53,829
Gross.
161
00:05:54,330 --> 00:05:54,831
It's kinky.
162
00:05:56,331 --> 00:05:57,834
Isn't this weekend the leather ball?
163
00:05:57,834 --> 00:06:00,337
I would think that your dance card would be full.
164
00:06:00,337 --> 00:06:01,839
I know, it's tempting, but...
165
00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:03,341
this year,
166
00:06:03,341 --> 00:06:06,345
I'm trading in my leather jockstrap...
167
00:06:06,345 --> 00:06:07,847
for...
168
00:06:07,847 --> 00:06:08,849
rubber pants.
169
00:06:10,350 --> 00:06:11,853
Isn't that right, sonny-Boy?
170
00:06:28,875 --> 00:06:30,376
Michael, there's hank.
171
00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:35,383
Okay, here we go.
172
00:06:35,383 --> 00:06:36,885
Have a nice visit. Bye.
173
00:06:36,885 --> 00:06:38,386
Thank you.
174
00:06:38,386 --> 00:06:40,389
Hey! Hey.
175
00:06:40,389 --> 00:06:42,892
Whoa! Good to see ya.
176
00:06:43,393 --> 00:06:44,394
I-I want you to meet somebody.
177
00:06:44,895 --> 00:06:45,897
Michael, this is hank. Hank,
178
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Michael. It's nice to finally meet you, hank.
179
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Wow, you're young.
180
00:06:52,405 --> 00:06:53,907
Yeah, well...
181
00:06:54,407 --> 00:06:55,910
I got a whole... a whole list of activities
182
00:06:55,910 --> 00:06:56,911
That we're going to do this week.
183
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Just... just chock full.
184
00:06:58,914 --> 00:07:00,415
Cool, huh?
185
00:07:00,415 --> 00:07:01,416
Yeah. Cool.
186
00:07:01,416 --> 00:07:02,918
There's this new exhibit at the science centre
187
00:07:03,419 --> 00:07:04,420
That i want to see.
188
00:07:04,420 --> 00:07:05,923
And the monongahela incline,
189
00:07:05,923 --> 00:07:07,424
It's like this, uh, cable car
190
00:07:07,925 --> 00:07:09,928
That has these incredible views of the city.
191
00:07:09,928 --> 00:07:11,429
Plus there's a rock-Climbing wall that i heard about,
192
00:07:11,429 --> 00:07:13,432
And i want to check that out.
193
00:07:18,439 --> 00:07:20,441
Gus, come on. Take it.
194
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,443
Look, look.
195
00:07:25,447 --> 00:07:26,449
It'syourpacifier.
196
00:07:26,950 --> 00:07:28,451
Youshould be sucking it.
197
00:07:33,458 --> 00:07:35,962
It's about fucking time. I ordered an hour ago.
198
00:07:39,466 --> 00:07:40,468
Gus...
199
00:07:41,468 --> 00:07:43,471
Think... nipple.
200
00:07:44,973 --> 00:07:45,974
Think cock.
201
00:07:47,476 --> 00:07:48,979
Whatever... whatever gets you there.
202
00:07:48,979 --> 00:07:49,980
Come on, come on.
203
00:07:49,980 --> 00:07:52,483
Come on.
204
00:07:58,992 --> 00:08:00,995
Your old man's not so bad at this.
205
00:08:05,499 --> 00:08:08,003
They'd better not have forgot the fucking sesame noodles this time.
206
00:08:08,503 --> 00:08:09,505
It's about time, i ordered...
207
00:08:10,006 --> 00:08:11,007
hey, sonny-Boy.
208
00:08:12,009 --> 00:08:13,510
Jesus.
209
00:08:13,510 --> 00:08:16,514
Yeah, well, you couldn't be more surprised if it was.
210
00:08:16,514 --> 00:08:17,515
You gonna let me in?
211
00:08:18,017 --> 00:08:19,018
Uh, s-Sure.
212
00:08:21,521 --> 00:08:24,524
Hey. Some place.
213
00:08:24,524 --> 00:08:27,028
Big as a palace.
214
00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:29,531
Looks like a dump from the outside.
215
00:08:29,531 --> 00:08:33,036
Hey, who's this?
216
00:08:33,036 --> 00:08:37,541
Uh, this is gus. Uh, he's...
217
00:08:37,541 --> 00:08:39,544
Lindsay's kid. You remember lindsay?
218
00:08:40,045 --> 00:08:43,550
Ah. Tallish, blonde?
219
00:08:43,550 --> 00:08:45,051
You used to take her out.
220
00:08:46,553 --> 00:08:48,555
She was a pretty girl.
221
00:08:48,555 --> 00:08:50,058
She's got one helluva cute son.
222
00:08:52,061 --> 00:08:53,062
She leaves him with you?
223
00:08:54,063 --> 00:08:55,065
Sometimes.
224
00:08:56,566 --> 00:08:59,070
So what're you doing, wandering around town?
225
00:08:59,570 --> 00:09:00,572
A lady-Friend?
226
00:09:02,074 --> 00:09:03,576
Aren't you a little bit old for that?
227
00:09:03,576 --> 00:09:05,577
That's not it.
228
00:09:09,082 --> 00:09:10,584
Need money?
229
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:13,088
No, i didn't come for your fucking money.
230
00:09:13,088 --> 00:09:14,589
Mom finally leave you?
231
00:09:14,589 --> 00:09:15,591
I've got cancer.
232
00:09:18,095 --> 00:09:19,596
It started in my lungs,
233
00:09:19,596 --> 00:09:21,099
But it's already spread.
234
00:09:21,599 --> 00:09:22,600
My brilliant...
235
00:09:23,101 --> 00:09:26,605
doctors discovered it on an x-Ray during my...
236
00:09:26,605 --> 00:09:28,107
physical last summer.
237
00:09:29,108 --> 00:09:31,111
Now, seems it's everywhere.
238
00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:36,618
Sorry.
239
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:39,122
I would rather the warden do the honours,
240
00:09:39,122 --> 00:09:42,126
But she insisted i tell you and your sister in person.
241
00:09:42,126 --> 00:09:44,129
So you're hearing it from me.
242
00:09:45,130 --> 00:09:46,131
Thanks.
243
00:09:46,131 --> 00:09:47,133
Hello?
244
00:09:47,632 --> 00:09:50,136
Sesame noodle. Didn't forget this time.
245
00:09:56,144 --> 00:09:58,147
You know, michael just moved in a few weeks ago.
246
00:09:58,147 --> 00:10:01,651
That's why, uh, the funny things that you see around here,
247
00:10:01,651 --> 00:10:05,156
Like captain astro, that's, uh...
248
00:10:05,156 --> 00:10:06,157
that's his.
249
00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:11,163
Must be even younger than i thought.
250
00:10:12,665 --> 00:10:14,167
Cisco's up. Cool!
251
00:10:14,167 --> 00:10:15,669
You read the stock page?
252
00:10:15,669 --> 00:10:17,171
Don't you?
253
00:10:17,171 --> 00:10:19,174
Uh, i stick to sports.
254
00:10:20,175 --> 00:10:22,178
Captain crunch. Still your favourite?
255
00:10:22,178 --> 00:10:25,682
Actually, i eat non-Fat, sugar-Free, organic mueslix.
256
00:10:26,684 --> 00:10:28,686
Well...
257
00:10:28,686 --> 00:10:31,689
that would explain why you've grown so much.
258
00:10:31,689 --> 00:10:35,695
You've probably grown a foot since the last time i saw you.
259
00:10:35,695 --> 00:10:37,197
I wear a size six shoe now.
260
00:10:37,197 --> 00:10:39,200
Dad bought me these awesome adidas...
261
00:10:40,201 --> 00:10:41,703
i mean, gary.
262
00:10:49,213 --> 00:10:51,215
Maybe i'll buy you an awesome pair of pants
263
00:10:51,215 --> 00:10:52,216
To go with those.
264
00:10:54,219 --> 00:10:55,221
'Morning.
265
00:10:55,221 --> 00:10:56,722
'Morning.
266
00:10:56,722 --> 00:10:58,725
Hi, hank. How'd you sleep?
267
00:10:58,725 --> 00:10:59,726
Okay.
268
00:11:01,729 --> 00:11:02,730
How about you?
269
00:11:06,736 --> 00:11:07,737
Get yourself some breakfast.
270
00:11:08,238 --> 00:11:09,239
We're leaving in 20 minutes.
271
00:11:09,239 --> 00:11:10,741
What's the rush? What's the rush?
272
00:11:11,242 --> 00:11:12,743
I don't want to waste any time. We got a million things to do.
273
00:11:13,244 --> 00:11:14,745
I'll get my wallet, you guys get dressed.
274
00:11:23,257 --> 00:11:25,260
So you must be happy to see your dad, huh?
275
00:11:26,762 --> 00:11:29,766
He's been, uh, talking about your visit non-Stop.
276
00:11:30,267 --> 00:11:31,268
He's really excited... look,
277
00:11:31,268 --> 00:11:33,770
I didn't want to come here okay? At all.
278
00:11:33,770 --> 00:11:35,773
My mom made me. So i'll just have to put up with it
279
00:11:35,773 --> 00:11:36,774
Until i can go home.
280
00:11:38,777 --> 00:11:40,279
Guys!
281
00:11:40,279 --> 00:11:41,281
Come on, let's go.
282
00:11:41,281 --> 00:11:42,282
Get dressed, we got a big day.
283
00:11:42,282 --> 00:11:43,783
Pittsburgh's waiting for us.
284
00:11:52,796 --> 00:11:54,297
How do you want your waffles?
285
00:11:54,297 --> 00:11:56,800
In peaches and grand marnier, or cherries and rum?
286
00:11:57,301 --> 00:11:59,304
Better yet, wolfgang, why don't you skip the waffles?
287
00:11:59,304 --> 00:12:01,307
And just serve the sauce...
288
00:12:01,307 --> 00:12:02,808
straight up.
289
00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:07,815
Gus just puked...
290
00:12:08,316 --> 00:12:09,818
all over me.
291
00:12:09,818 --> 00:12:11,820
Babies do that. Mmm.
292
00:12:11,820 --> 00:12:14,823
All over my favourite leather jacket.
293
00:12:14,823 --> 00:12:16,326
A fashion critic already.
294
00:12:17,827 --> 00:12:20,831
Look who's here!
295
00:12:20,831 --> 00:12:22,834
Oh, can i hold him?
296
00:12:23,335 --> 00:12:23,835
Yeah, be my guest.
297
00:12:23,835 --> 00:12:26,839
Oh, look at you.
298
00:12:26,839 --> 00:12:30,845
Huh? Oh, look at you. How are you, gorgeous gus?
299
00:12:31,346 --> 00:12:32,848
Come here. He's aces.
300
00:12:32,848 --> 00:12:35,351
But i suspect he misses his mother's touch.
301
00:12:35,351 --> 00:12:37,353
Ah, well i'll take care of that.
302
00:12:37,353 --> 00:12:38,855
You know... hi, baby.
303
00:12:38,855 --> 00:12:40,857
If you'd be interested in satisfying
304
00:12:41,359 --> 00:12:44,363
Your maternal urges for a longer period of time,
305
00:12:44,363 --> 00:12:46,865
Recreating the amber hues of michael's childhood
306
00:12:46,865 --> 00:12:49,369
For an entire evening, for instance...
307
00:12:50,371 --> 00:12:52,373
that could be arranged.
308
00:12:52,373 --> 00:12:54,376
You want to go to the leather ball, huh?
309
00:12:55,878 --> 00:12:59,382
Hmm, you're good. Yeah.
310
00:12:59,882 --> 00:13:01,885
But you're barking up the wrong babysitter.
311
00:13:02,386 --> 00:13:05,390
'Cause i've got the graveyard shift at the diner, don't i?
312
00:13:08,894 --> 00:13:10,897
I'll be back.
313
00:13:10,897 --> 00:13:13,401
Be sure and wash them down with bottled water,
314
00:13:13,901 --> 00:13:16,405
Not that shit from the susquehanna.
315
00:13:16,405 --> 00:13:18,907
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
316
00:13:18,907 --> 00:13:19,908
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
317
00:13:22,412 --> 00:13:24,415
Yeah. Must be tough living with that.
318
00:13:34,428 --> 00:13:35,429
Brian?
319
00:13:36,931 --> 00:13:38,933
Honey... you're not...
320
00:13:39,934 --> 00:13:41,937
Hmm. No.
321
00:13:43,439 --> 00:13:45,942
But my dad's... got cancer.
322
00:13:47,445 --> 00:13:49,947
Your dad's sick? He came over last night...
323
00:13:50,949 --> 00:13:51,950
to tell me that.
324
00:13:53,953 --> 00:13:55,455
I'm so sorry.
325
00:13:57,458 --> 00:13:58,960
How long's he got?
326
00:13:59,461 --> 00:14:00,961
Couple months, tops.
327
00:14:07,471 --> 00:14:08,472
Well, then...
328
00:14:10,475 --> 00:14:12,477
if you don't mind some free advice
329
00:14:12,477 --> 00:14:14,480
From someone who's known you a lot longer
330
00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:15,481
Than you've known yourself,
331
00:14:15,982 --> 00:14:18,485
You should tell him. Tell him what?
332
00:14:19,487 --> 00:14:21,488
You know damn well, don't play dumb.
333
00:14:22,490 --> 00:14:23,991
He made a very big gesture
334
00:14:23,991 --> 00:14:24,993
In telling you about himself.
335
00:14:25,494 --> 00:14:27,497
I'm saying you should return the favour.
336
00:14:27,497 --> 00:14:29,499
No fucking way.
337
00:14:29,999 --> 00:14:32,503
My father hasn't known anything about my life for 29 years,
338
00:14:32,503 --> 00:14:34,506
Or cared.
339
00:14:34,506 --> 00:14:36,008
Why should i bother now?
340
00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:44,519
Because it's good for you.
341
00:14:44,519 --> 00:14:46,521
To tell a dying man i'm queer?
342
00:14:46,521 --> 00:14:48,023
To be honest.
343
00:14:48,023 --> 00:14:49,024
I'm always honest.
344
00:14:49,525 --> 00:14:50,527
You think you are.
345
00:14:51,027 --> 00:14:52,028
How honest is it
346
00:14:52,028 --> 00:14:53,531
To let your father go to his grave
347
00:14:53,531 --> 00:14:55,533
Without ever really knowing who his son is, honey?
348
00:15:00,540 --> 00:15:04,043
Look, i know you think he never loved you.
349
00:15:04,043 --> 00:15:06,547
But it might be a way to get through to him.
350
00:15:06,547 --> 00:15:08,550
For whatever it's worth,
351
00:15:08,550 --> 00:15:10,051
Before it's too late.
352
00:15:14,558 --> 00:15:17,061
If i wanted a therapist,
353
00:15:17,061 --> 00:15:19,064
I'd look in the fucking yellow pages.
354
00:15:20,566 --> 00:15:22,068
Yeah, but i'm a hell of a lot cheaper,
355
00:15:22,068 --> 00:15:23,570
And i don't take off august.
356
00:15:25,572 --> 00:15:27,575
I-I bet he's hungry.
357
00:15:27,575 --> 00:15:29,076
Can i feed him?
358
00:15:33,081 --> 00:15:34,584
What are you doing tonight?
359
00:15:36,587 --> 00:15:38,589
Huh! Isn't that aquarium incredible?
360
00:15:39,090 --> 00:15:40,592
I mean, i could stare at those fish tanks forever.
361
00:15:40,592 --> 00:15:42,094
It just seemed that long.
362
00:15:42,094 --> 00:15:44,096
Actually, it was just under five hours.
363
00:15:44,597 --> 00:15:46,098
This is so great. I mean, i love being together, you know,
364
00:15:46,599 --> 00:15:48,602
Sharing this, just you and me and michael.
365
00:15:48,602 --> 00:15:51,105
Yeah. Great. Ah.
366
00:15:51,105 --> 00:15:53,107
Can we take a break for lunch soon?
367
00:15:53,107 --> 00:15:55,611
Um, looking at all those fish made me hungry for chicken.
368
00:15:55,611 --> 00:15:57,113
Are you kidding me? We've got to get to the museum.
369
00:15:57,113 --> 00:15:58,615
There's a dinosaur exhibit.
370
00:15:58,615 --> 00:16:00,117
Ah, i haven't been into dinosaurs
371
00:16:00,117 --> 00:16:02,120
Since, like, third grade.
372
00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:03,121
Ha! I love dinosaurs.
373
00:16:03,121 --> 00:16:04,122
It's nice to know there's a creature
374
00:16:04,623 --> 00:16:06,125
Actually older than me.
375
00:16:06,125 --> 00:16:07,627
Anyway, after that, we can go to the driving range.
376
00:16:08,127 --> 00:16:09,629
No, the... no, the batting cage
377
00:16:09,629 --> 00:16:11,131
'Cause your mother tells me your swing's really coming along.
378
00:16:11,131 --> 00:16:12,633
And there's this arcade that i want to check out.
379
00:16:13,133 --> 00:16:14,135
I... i hear it's really fantastic.
380
00:16:14,135 --> 00:16:16,137
I guess we'll... we'll find out.
381
00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:35,162
I can't believe you actually went out in public dressed like that.
382
00:16:36,163 --> 00:16:38,166
My mother used to say,
383
00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:39,168
"Find your best feature
384
00:16:39,669 --> 00:16:41,671
And play it for all it's worth."
385
00:16:41,671 --> 00:16:43,173
So that's exactly what i did.
386
00:16:44,675 --> 00:16:46,177
Besides, it's called the leather ball.
387
00:16:46,678 --> 00:16:49,180
You could have at least dressed for the occasion.
388
00:16:49,180 --> 00:16:51,183
I did. I wore a leather belt.
389
00:16:51,183 --> 00:16:54,187
You are such a stick in the mud.
390
00:16:54,187 --> 00:16:56,691
Why? Because i-I don't want to... look like a... cross
391
00:16:57,191 --> 00:16:58,693
Between a nazi storm trooper and...
392
00:16:58,693 --> 00:17:00,195
roy rogers?
393
00:17:00,696 --> 00:17:02,699
Mm, stop it, you're giving me a hard-On.
394
00:17:06,704 --> 00:17:08,206
I hope he's housebroken.
395
00:17:09,707 --> 00:17:12,711
Honestly, these people a-Are too weird.
396
00:17:15,715 --> 00:17:18,218
Hello, pig bottom.
397
00:17:18,218 --> 00:17:19,721
How would you like to polish my boot
398
00:17:19,721 --> 00:17:21,723
With your tongue? Mmm.
399
00:17:21,723 --> 00:17:23,225
Like i said.
400
00:17:23,726 --> 00:17:25,228
What are you doing here? I thought you had gus.
401
00:17:26,229 --> 00:17:27,731
I found a sitter.
402
00:17:27,731 --> 00:17:29,734
Enjoy, you guys.
403
00:17:29,734 --> 00:17:30,735
Where're you going?
404
00:17:31,235 --> 00:17:32,737
Home.
405
00:17:32,737 --> 00:17:34,740
To my leather recliner.
406
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:36,743
That's about as kinky as i get.
407
00:17:43,752 --> 00:17:44,753
Let's go!
408
00:18:29,311 --> 00:18:30,813
Oh my god,
409
00:18:30,813 --> 00:18:32,315
Isn't that...
410
00:18:32,315 --> 00:18:33,817
dale wexler?
411
00:18:33,817 --> 00:18:36,821
Well, now you know one of his secrets, don't you?
412
00:18:39,323 --> 00:18:41,827
That was quite a day, huh? No shit.
413
00:18:42,328 --> 00:18:43,830
I saw more of pittsburgh in 12 hours
414
00:18:44,330 --> 00:18:46,333
Than i've seen in my entire life.
415
00:18:46,834 --> 00:18:48,837
You know, every time i see him, he's different.
416
00:18:48,837 --> 00:18:51,340
And i have to spend the couple of days that we have together
417
00:18:51,340 --> 00:18:53,342
Trying to get to know the "new hank" before he's gone again.
418
00:18:57,848 --> 00:18:58,849
Michael? Huh?
419
00:19:01,352 --> 00:19:02,855
Aren't you supposed to take off your clothes
420
00:19:02,855 --> 00:19:04,857
Before you come to bed?
421
00:19:04,857 --> 00:19:07,360
Don't flip out, um... but i...
422
00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:10,364
i think i should go stay at my old place tonight.
423
00:19:10,364 --> 00:19:12,367
What are you talking about, what for?
424
00:19:12,868 --> 00:19:15,871
I think hank's uncomfortable with me here.
425
00:19:15,871 --> 00:19:17,874
Where did you get that idea? Did he tell you that?
426
00:19:18,374 --> 00:19:19,877
Well, not in so many words.
427
00:19:19,877 --> 00:19:21,879
But, you know, the silences
428
00:19:21,879 --> 00:19:24,382
Told me everything i needed to know.
429
00:19:24,382 --> 00:19:25,885
Well...
430
00:19:25,885 --> 00:19:27,386
you got to give him some time, you know,
431
00:19:27,386 --> 00:19:28,889
To get to know you.
432
00:19:28,889 --> 00:19:30,390
I don't think he wants to get to know me, you know.
433
00:19:30,390 --> 00:19:33,895
And i don't blame him. This whole "hank has two daddies" thing
434
00:19:33,895 --> 00:19:35,397
Is too much for any kid.
435
00:19:36,398 --> 00:19:38,400
He had no problem when i was with mack.
436
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:39,903
Well, no offense, but you know,
437
00:19:39,903 --> 00:19:41,905
Hank was a lot younger then, you know.
438
00:19:41,905 --> 00:19:45,410
Now he's older, and he's starting to define his sexuality,
439
00:19:45,410 --> 00:19:48,915
I'm sure it's pretty unsettling to see his dad and his new male lover.
440
00:19:50,917 --> 00:19:53,921
The only way he's going to get used to us is by having you around.
441
00:19:53,921 --> 00:19:57,426
Well... can't we... can't we ease him into it? You know,
442
00:19:57,926 --> 00:19:58,927
Start out with a guest appearance
443
00:19:58,927 --> 00:20:01,430
And then build me up to a costarring role?
444
00:20:01,430 --> 00:20:02,933
You're not going anywhere.
445
00:20:03,433 --> 00:20:04,935
It'll only be for a couple of nights.
446
00:20:04,935 --> 00:20:06,437
No, not even for one night.
447
00:20:13,947 --> 00:20:15,950
Hank's going to be fine.
448
00:20:15,950 --> 00:20:16,952
And so are we.
449
00:20:18,453 --> 00:20:19,453
Now...
450
00:20:20,956 --> 00:20:22,457
let's get you out of these,
451
00:20:22,959 --> 00:20:23,960
And into bed.
452
00:20:32,471 --> 00:20:34,474
I thought those might make an appearance.
453
00:20:50,494 --> 00:20:51,997
Ted?
454
00:20:51,997 --> 00:20:53,999
Hey, dale! I thought that was you.
455
00:20:53,999 --> 00:20:56,002
Then i said to myself, "wait a minute, it can't be.
456
00:20:56,002 --> 00:20:59,006
Not, uh, ted schmidt."
457
00:20:59,006 --> 00:21:00,508
Ahh. Well, this is a surprise.
458
00:21:00,508 --> 00:21:03,511
So, you, uh, daddy, a master... slave?
459
00:21:04,512 --> 00:21:05,513
Actually, none of the above.
460
00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:08,518
I... i'm here just as an observer.
461
00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:09,519
Yeah, that's what they all say.
462
00:21:10,020 --> 00:21:11,522
Next thing you know, there they are in a sling,
463
00:21:12,023 --> 00:21:13,524
With a bottle of poppers stuck up their nose
464
00:21:14,025 --> 00:21:15,027
And five guys fisting them.
465
00:21:16,528 --> 00:21:18,531
I guarantee you, that's not the case with me.
466
00:21:18,531 --> 00:21:21,035
A-A friend... dragged me here.
467
00:21:21,035 --> 00:21:23,537
Um, cowboy bob lassoed me.
468
00:21:23,537 --> 00:21:25,039
He's promised to take me out to the stable,
469
00:21:25,039 --> 00:21:27,042
Tie me up like a squealing pig, and brand me.
470
00:21:27,042 --> 00:21:28,544
Yee-Haw!
471
00:21:29,045 --> 00:21:31,047
You'd better git-Along, little doggie!
472
00:21:31,548 --> 00:21:33,550
Uh... that's my friend who...
473
00:21:34,051 --> 00:21:35,053
who dragged me here.
474
00:21:35,553 --> 00:21:37,556
Now he's being dragged away. Lucky him.
475
00:21:42,562 --> 00:21:45,065
Yeah well, uh, look, i-I'm sure y-You must have another slave
476
00:21:45,065 --> 00:21:47,068
You've got to... work over,
477
00:21:47,568 --> 00:21:48,569
Whatever it is you do,
478
00:21:48,569 --> 00:21:50,072
So don't... don't let me keep you.
479
00:21:50,072 --> 00:21:52,575
That was just a... matinee.
480
00:21:52,575 --> 00:21:55,579
Stick around. The next one's going to be really hot.
481
00:21:55,579 --> 00:21:56,580
Oh...
482
00:21:56,580 --> 00:21:58,583
i, uh, actually, i was on my way home...
483
00:21:58,583 --> 00:22:00,586
a-Afterwards, how about, uh...
484
00:22:00,586 --> 00:22:02,588
coming over to my place for a drink? We can catch up.
485
00:22:02,588 --> 00:22:04,590
Actually, it's pretty late...
486
00:22:04,590 --> 00:22:05,591
you know.
487
00:22:05,591 --> 00:22:07,094
Strictly as "an observer".
488
00:22:11,099 --> 00:22:12,101
Showtime.
489
00:22:56,158 --> 00:22:57,660
Hey, little boy,
490
00:22:57,660 --> 00:22:59,662
You wanna come back to my place?
491
00:22:59,662 --> 00:23:00,664
No.
492
00:23:01,665 --> 00:23:04,669
Fuck you. You'd like that, wouldn't you?
493
00:23:04,669 --> 00:23:07,172
I can tell you need a daddy.
494
00:23:07,672 --> 00:23:09,175
I said, "fuck you."
495
00:23:10,676 --> 00:23:12,679
You're not my daddy.
496
00:23:15,683 --> 00:23:16,684
I don't need a fucking...
497
00:23:17,686 --> 00:23:18,687
daddy.
498
00:23:27,699 --> 00:23:30,702
I've been "mr. Leather" for the past three years.
499
00:23:32,205 --> 00:23:36,210
I've held, uh, both regional and national titles.
500
00:23:37,712 --> 00:23:40,215
I'm, uh... impressed.
501
00:23:42,718 --> 00:23:43,720
And surprised.
502
00:23:46,724 --> 00:23:47,725
Surprised?
503
00:23:51,729 --> 00:23:52,731
Who would've suspected?
504
00:23:53,732 --> 00:23:55,735
Especially considering your "other life".
505
00:23:56,236 --> 00:23:59,240
The one where i wear a suit, and crunch numbers,
506
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:01,743
And treat the clients with undeserved respect?
507
00:24:02,744 --> 00:24:04,247
That's not who i really am.
508
00:24:06,250 --> 00:24:07,251
And this is?
509
00:24:07,251 --> 00:24:09,254
It's amazing, ted...
510
00:24:10,754 --> 00:24:14,759
How it's... allowed me to expand my horizons.
511
00:24:16,762 --> 00:24:18,765
In other areas too, even in business.
512
00:24:18,765 --> 00:24:20,768
So, uh...
513
00:24:20,768 --> 00:24:23,772
being a leather daddy is the key to your success?
514
00:24:23,772 --> 00:24:25,274
Oh, you have no idea what can happen
515
00:24:25,274 --> 00:24:28,278
Once... you give yourself permission.
516
00:24:30,281 --> 00:24:33,284
Permission... uh, w-W-What, t-T-To chain people up? Tie people down?
517
00:24:34,785 --> 00:24:36,788
That can be the most liberating part of all.
518
00:24:38,291 --> 00:24:40,293
Relinquishing control,
519
00:24:40,293 --> 00:24:42,796
Allowing someone else to give you...
520
00:24:42,796 --> 00:24:44,799
pain, pleasure.
521
00:24:45,300 --> 00:24:47,803
Whatever you most fear and desire.
522
00:24:52,809 --> 00:24:53,810
Would you...
523
00:24:54,311 --> 00:24:56,314
would you mind if i use your bathroom?
524
00:24:56,314 --> 00:24:57,315
It's right downstairs.
525
00:25:48,882 --> 00:25:50,385
I see you found my playroom.
526
00:25:50,885 --> 00:25:53,889
I'm sorry, i just opened the wrong door. Or not.
527
00:25:53,889 --> 00:25:57,893
So what do you think? Uh, well, i...
528
00:25:57,893 --> 00:25:59,896
guess you gave your decorator full rein.
529
00:26:01,899 --> 00:26:03,401
Would you like me to give you a little demonstration?
530
00:26:03,902 --> 00:26:05,404
Oh, that's okay, actually, i just, uh...
531
00:26:05,904 --> 00:26:07,407
i just, uh, wanted to wash my hands.
532
00:26:07,907 --> 00:26:08,908
We'd both enjoy it.
533
00:26:08,908 --> 00:26:11,412
Always thought you were hot.
534
00:26:11,412 --> 00:26:14,416
You did? Vanilla boys are always the wildest.
535
00:26:15,918 --> 00:26:17,919
All that unfulfilled desire.
536
00:26:24,429 --> 00:26:26,932
Why don't you allow me to introduce you to yourself?
537
00:26:28,434 --> 00:26:30,937
To the real ted schmidt.
538
00:26:30,937 --> 00:26:33,441
I promise i won't do anything you don't want me to.
539
00:26:38,947 --> 00:26:40,950
You say "stop",
540
00:26:40,950 --> 00:26:42,452
And i'll stop.
541
00:26:42,452 --> 00:26:43,453
Stop!
542
00:26:46,457 --> 00:26:49,461
I'm sor... i didn't... i didn't come here for this.
543
00:26:49,461 --> 00:26:50,463
I know.
544
00:26:50,963 --> 00:26:52,466
You're just an observer.
545
00:26:52,466 --> 00:26:54,968
That's right, and i think i've seen enough.
546
00:26:54,968 --> 00:26:58,473
So... if you'll just excuse me.
547
00:27:05,982 --> 00:27:07,485
You know what i remember about you most?
548
00:27:08,986 --> 00:27:10,489
Every day in the school cafeteria,
549
00:27:10,489 --> 00:27:12,492
You'd have the same thing for lunch.
550
00:27:12,492 --> 00:27:14,494
So reliable.
551
00:27:14,494 --> 00:27:17,498
I used to marvel how the menu never changed.
552
00:27:17,498 --> 00:27:19,000
I guess neither have you.
553
00:27:23,004 --> 00:27:24,006
Thank you for the...
554
00:27:25,508 --> 00:27:26,509
drink.
555
00:27:31,015 --> 00:27:33,018
No, i had no idea.
556
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:36,022
He was going to give the baby hot milk.
557
00:27:36,022 --> 00:27:38,526
He didn't test it on his arm. I didn't know.
558
00:27:38,526 --> 00:27:39,527
Thank god i walked in when i did.
559
00:27:39,527 --> 00:27:41,529
Gus could've been scalded. I'm sorry.
560
00:27:41,529 --> 00:27:43,030
I'm so sorry.
561
00:27:43,030 --> 00:27:44,032
What the fuck are you doing here?
562
00:27:44,032 --> 00:27:46,034
I came back from miami early
563
00:27:46,034 --> 00:27:47,537
And there's a message on my voice mail from lindsay
564
00:27:48,037 --> 00:27:50,040
Saying that she left gus here with you.
565
00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:53,545
So i came by to check on him, and it's a good goddamn thing i did.
566
00:27:53,545 --> 00:27:55,046
Pawning him off on anyone
567
00:27:55,046 --> 00:27:57,550
So you can go to a fucking leather ball?
568
00:27:57,550 --> 00:27:59,553
Hey, justin's not "anyone". I love gus.
569
00:27:59,553 --> 00:28:02,055
Baby, i know you do, honey. This isn't about you.
570
00:28:03,056 --> 00:28:04,559
You take him.
571
00:28:04,559 --> 00:28:05,560
This is about you
572
00:28:06,060 --> 00:28:08,063
And what an irresponsible shit you are.
573
00:28:09,565 --> 00:28:12,569
Listen, i went out for a couple of hours.
574
00:28:13,070 --> 00:28:14,572
Yeah, well you shouldn't have been out at all.
575
00:28:14,572 --> 00:28:16,074
Because, you see, the thing about parenthood is,
576
00:28:16,074 --> 00:28:18,076
You don't get anonymous-Sex breaks twice a day.
577
00:28:18,076 --> 00:28:20,580
Now give me your car keys.
578
00:28:20,580 --> 00:28:23,583
Uh, excuse me? I said give me your car keys
579
00:28:23,583 --> 00:28:27,088
So i can go get the baby seat out of the back of your jeep.
580
00:28:27,589 --> 00:28:28,590
I'm taking gus home.
581
00:28:29,591 --> 00:28:30,593
No, you're not.
582
00:28:33,096 --> 00:28:34,598
This is his home.
583
00:28:34,598 --> 00:28:37,101
At least for this weekend.
584
00:28:37,101 --> 00:28:39,605
Sorry, your privileges have been revoked.
585
00:28:39,605 --> 00:28:41,608
Don't fucking tell me what my privileges are.
586
00:28:43,109 --> 00:28:44,109
I'm his father.
587
00:28:46,112 --> 00:28:47,114
Who are you?
588
00:28:53,623 --> 00:28:56,126
I may be no one,
589
00:28:56,126 --> 00:28:57,127
But at least i love him enough
590
00:28:57,628 --> 00:29:00,632
To know that his needs come before mine.
591
00:29:01,132 --> 00:29:03,135
Which is more than can be said for you.
592
00:29:06,138 --> 00:29:09,142
Yeah, go, go, go, go, go, go!
593
00:29:09,142 --> 00:29:10,144
Hank!
594
00:29:12,146 --> 00:29:13,148
Yes!
595
00:29:13,148 --> 00:29:14,650
Daddy, look at me. Look at me.
596
00:29:14,650 --> 00:29:16,152
Careful, honey.
597
00:29:16,653 --> 00:29:17,153
Yes!
598
00:29:21,158 --> 00:29:23,662
Hank scored the winning goal in the championship last year.
599
00:29:23,662 --> 00:29:25,664
Of course he did.
600
00:29:25,664 --> 00:29:27,166
How come you're sitting on the sidelines?
601
00:29:27,166 --> 00:29:29,168
I told you, i can't skate.
602
00:29:29,168 --> 00:29:30,671
Well, i'll help you.
603
00:29:33,174 --> 00:29:34,676
If god wanted me to be on ice
604
00:29:34,676 --> 00:29:36,178
He'd have made me a vodka martini.
605
00:29:36,679 --> 00:29:39,182
Which i could use right about now.
606
00:29:39,683 --> 00:29:40,684
What is this, "fags on ice"?
607
00:29:42,186 --> 00:29:43,688
That's the olympic figure-Skating team.
608
00:29:46,691 --> 00:29:47,693
Okay.
609
00:29:47,693 --> 00:29:49,695
Ah, that's me.
610
00:29:50,196 --> 00:29:52,198
Hank, will you help me with michael, please?
611
00:29:54,201 --> 00:29:54,702
Dr. Cameron.
612
00:29:56,204 --> 00:29:57,706
Yes.
613
00:29:57,706 --> 00:29:59,709
Oh, you're kidding!
614
00:29:59,709 --> 00:30:01,210
Uh-Huh.
615
00:30:01,210 --> 00:30:04,214
Yeah, i could be there in about half an hour.
616
00:30:04,214 --> 00:30:05,717
Okay.
617
00:30:06,217 --> 00:30:08,219
One of the penguins threw his back out during practice.
618
00:30:09,220 --> 00:30:10,723
I'm sorry, champ, i've got to go.
619
00:30:10,723 --> 00:30:11,724
I won't be very long.
620
00:30:11,724 --> 00:30:12,725
No biggie.
621
00:30:16,731 --> 00:30:18,232
Well, it's a biggie to me.
622
00:30:18,232 --> 00:30:19,735
You're leaving me alone with him?
623
00:30:19,735 --> 00:30:21,236
Well, i'm not going to be very long.
624
00:30:21,236 --> 00:30:22,739
We don't know each other very well.
625
00:30:22,739 --> 00:30:25,242
Well, you'll get to. But...
626
00:30:25,242 --> 00:30:26,744
david, you don't understand.
627
00:30:26,744 --> 00:30:28,246
I don't understand what, michael?
628
00:30:30,248 --> 00:30:33,252
Well, he was looking forward to being with you.
629
00:30:33,753 --> 00:30:35,755
I'm not going to be gone for very long.
630
00:30:35,755 --> 00:30:36,757
Look.
631
00:30:38,258 --> 00:30:39,761
Here's the itinerary. You stick to that,
632
00:30:39,761 --> 00:30:41,262
You'll have a great time. Okay?
633
00:30:41,764 --> 00:30:42,765
I'll see you in a little while.
634
00:30:53,779 --> 00:30:54,780
Hi, honey. Hello, deb.
635
00:30:54,780 --> 00:30:56,282
Hi, baby.
636
00:30:56,282 --> 00:30:59,286
Hey! How'd it go last night, "daddy"?
637
00:30:59,286 --> 00:31:02,791
Huh. Would you mind not using that word in my presence?
638
00:31:02,791 --> 00:31:04,794
Ooh, grouchy, huh?
639
00:31:04,794 --> 00:31:06,796
That's what happens when you tend to a tot, see?
640
00:31:07,296 --> 00:31:08,799
It's not a pretty job.
641
00:31:09,299 --> 00:31:10,300
But i'm proud of you, brian.
642
00:31:10,300 --> 00:31:12,803
Huh? Sacrificing the leather ball.
643
00:31:12,803 --> 00:31:13,805
Whoo! That's big.
644
00:31:13,805 --> 00:31:15,807
Altruism's his middle name.
645
00:31:16,809 --> 00:31:18,310
Oh, is that what the "a" stands for?
646
00:31:18,310 --> 00:31:20,313
I didn't think in a million years
647
00:31:20,313 --> 00:31:21,816
You'd give up an event like that.
648
00:31:22,316 --> 00:31:23,818
So i tip my hat...
649
00:31:23,818 --> 00:31:25,320
or should i say, my wig?
650
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:27,322
To you, kid.
651
00:31:27,322 --> 00:31:29,826
Huh? For taking care of your kid.
652
00:31:29,826 --> 00:31:31,328
Actually, i'm the one that...
653
00:31:31,328 --> 00:31:33,330
Psst... um...
654
00:31:33,330 --> 00:31:35,833
give me up and i'll tie your balls so tight
655
00:31:35,833 --> 00:31:38,336
They'll ache for a week.
656
00:31:38,336 --> 00:31:41,340
This is punishment? Mm-Hmm.
657
00:31:41,340 --> 00:31:42,342
I helped.
658
00:31:42,342 --> 00:31:43,343
Did you, honey? Mm-Hmm.
659
00:31:43,343 --> 00:31:44,846
Good, baby.
660
00:31:44,846 --> 00:31:46,848
Well, all this talk about babies,
661
00:31:46,848 --> 00:31:48,350
Has given me a craving
662
00:31:48,851 --> 00:31:49,852
For the babyback ribs.
663
00:31:50,352 --> 00:31:50,854
Got 'em.
664
00:31:52,856 --> 00:31:54,858
I'll have, uh, the tuna fish...
665
00:31:54,858 --> 00:31:56,360
on white bread.
666
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:57,862
Double mayo.
667
00:31:57,862 --> 00:32:00,866
Potato chips, and coleslaw.
668
00:32:00,866 --> 00:32:02,368
And vanilla pudding.
669
00:32:05,873 --> 00:32:07,374
Christ, am i really that predictable?
670
00:32:07,876 --> 00:32:09,377
No, honey, just reliable.
671
00:32:09,377 --> 00:32:10,880
Thanks ever so.
672
00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:14,884
I-It's just not your style to be spontaneous,
673
00:32:14,884 --> 00:32:15,384
Wild...
674
00:32:15,885 --> 00:32:16,887
reckless.
675
00:32:16,887 --> 00:32:18,889
No, it's my style to never take a chance,
676
00:32:18,889 --> 00:32:20,391
Never let myself go,
677
00:32:20,391 --> 00:32:22,394
Never put my ass in a sling.
678
00:32:23,395 --> 00:32:24,898
I mean, on the line.
679
00:32:24,898 --> 00:32:26,900
Honey, it's only lunch.
680
00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:29,904
Yeah, well in that case, i will have the cajun catfish
681
00:32:30,404 --> 00:32:33,408
With the pad thai noodles and the...
682
00:32:33,408 --> 00:32:36,412
uh, papaya-Mango salsa on the side.
683
00:32:36,412 --> 00:32:38,414
Letting go does not mean getting the runs.
684
00:32:39,917 --> 00:32:41,919
Give him the usual.
685
00:32:42,921 --> 00:32:44,924
It doesn't matter what you eat.
686
00:32:44,924 --> 00:32:47,426
You'll always be old...
687
00:32:47,426 --> 00:32:49,429
old, reliable ted.
688
00:32:52,934 --> 00:32:54,436
You know it's... i-It's amazing
689
00:32:54,436 --> 00:32:55,938
How you can live in a city your whole life
690
00:32:55,938 --> 00:32:57,940
And not realize how many wonderful sights
691
00:32:57,940 --> 00:32:59,943
And attractions there are, you know?
692
00:32:59,943 --> 00:33:01,444
For instance, who knew that there was a thing
693
00:33:01,444 --> 00:33:02,947
Called the "scream machine"?
694
00:33:02,947 --> 00:33:05,450
At the carnegie science centre, you know?
695
00:33:05,450 --> 00:33:08,955
Experiencing the g-Forces was certainly a, uh, "stomach churning,
696
00:33:08,955 --> 00:33:11,458
Nail-Biting science education" for me.
697
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:14,462
What made it especially memorable
698
00:33:14,963 --> 00:33:18,967
Was the large pepperoni pizza we shared moments before.
699
00:33:19,468 --> 00:33:21,470
Can we go home now?
700
00:33:21,470 --> 00:33:23,473
What, and miss the, uh...
701
00:33:23,473 --> 00:33:24,975
monongahela incline?
702
00:33:28,981 --> 00:33:29,982
Look...
703
00:33:32,485 --> 00:33:33,486
i know this isn't easy for you.
704
00:33:35,489 --> 00:33:37,492
You know, having a dad who's, well...
705
00:33:38,993 --> 00:33:40,495
different from other fathers.
706
00:33:40,495 --> 00:33:41,997
And i'm sure it doesn't make it any easier
707
00:33:41,997 --> 00:33:44,000
Seeing him with me.
708
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:45,502
So he's gay. Big deal!
709
00:33:45,502 --> 00:33:48,006
I've only known about it like since i was, like, nine.
710
00:33:51,010 --> 00:33:52,511
Wait.
711
00:33:52,511 --> 00:33:54,014
So why don't you want to be here?
712
00:33:54,014 --> 00:33:55,515
'Cause he drives me nuts.
713
00:33:55,515 --> 00:33:56,516
Every time i come here,
714
00:33:57,018 --> 00:33:58,519
He's got to have every single minute planned.
715
00:33:59,020 --> 00:34:01,022
The incline, the museum, the aquarium.
716
00:34:01,022 --> 00:34:03,025
I mean, that may have been fun when i was a kid,
717
00:34:03,025 --> 00:34:05,528
But... how many times can you see fish?
718
00:34:06,029 --> 00:34:08,532
So why don't you tell him to back off?
719
00:34:09,033 --> 00:34:12,037
Have you ever tried telling him to back off?
720
00:34:12,037 --> 00:34:13,038
Good point. But you know,
721
00:34:13,038 --> 00:34:14,540
He just wants you to have a good time.
722
00:34:17,544 --> 00:34:20,048
Oh, my god. Check it out.
723
00:34:20,547 --> 00:34:22,550
Scorpionhead number 34.
724
00:34:22,550 --> 00:34:25,554
Holy shit! I've been looking for that my entire life.
725
00:34:25,554 --> 00:34:28,558
You too? Y-You can't even find that on e-Bay.
726
00:34:28,558 --> 00:34:31,062
U-Uh... scorpionhead is so cool.
727
00:34:31,062 --> 00:34:33,064
So cool! The way he can...
728
00:34:33,064 --> 00:34:34,566
sting with his nose!
729
00:34:34,566 --> 00:34:35,567
Exactly! You want to check it out?
730
00:34:35,567 --> 00:34:36,568
Fuck yeah!
731
00:35:08,109 --> 00:35:11,114
Hey. Your mom's in the kitchen.
732
00:35:12,115 --> 00:35:13,616
Get yourself a cup of coffee,
733
00:35:13,616 --> 00:35:15,119
And get me a refill, would you?
734
00:35:16,620 --> 00:35:18,123
I'm not here to see her, actually.
735
00:35:22,128 --> 00:35:23,629
Shouldn't you be taking it easy?
736
00:35:24,130 --> 00:35:25,632
I'll have plenty of time to take it easy...
737
00:35:27,134 --> 00:35:29,637
there's years of stuff out here, i...
738
00:35:29,637 --> 00:35:33,142
I need to... i want to... get everything in order.
739
00:35:33,142 --> 00:35:37,148
Oh, wait till you see this, sonny-Boy.
740
00:35:37,148 --> 00:35:39,150
Ta-Da!
741
00:35:41,153 --> 00:35:43,156
What was that team you used to bowl with?
742
00:35:43,156 --> 00:35:44,656
Eastway kings.
743
00:35:46,159 --> 00:35:48,161
You used to come with me when you were, what, eight, nine?
744
00:35:48,161 --> 00:35:49,163
You remember that?
745
00:35:49,163 --> 00:35:50,664
Yeah.
746
00:35:53,168 --> 00:35:55,171
I always hoped you'd take it up.
747
00:35:57,174 --> 00:35:58,675
Listen, about the other night.
748
00:35:58,675 --> 00:36:02,180
I know. I should've called before i dropped in.
749
00:36:02,681 --> 00:36:04,183
Like "the warden" says,
750
00:36:04,183 --> 00:36:06,185
"That's what they make telephones for."
751
00:36:09,189 --> 00:36:10,190
I got it.
752
00:36:10,690 --> 00:36:11,191
Shit.
753
00:36:14,196 --> 00:36:16,198
We need to talk.
754
00:36:16,698 --> 00:36:17,700
You know, i think that's the first time
755
00:36:17,700 --> 00:36:19,702
I ever heard you say that? Yeah.
756
00:36:20,204 --> 00:36:22,706
That's probably 'cause that's the first time i ever have.
757
00:36:22,706 --> 00:36:25,210
I just thought that maybe we could, uh...
758
00:36:25,210 --> 00:36:27,212
sneak it under the wire, huh?
759
00:36:27,712 --> 00:36:29,715
Hey, i got some books here.
760
00:36:30,716 --> 00:36:31,718
I'm gay.
761
00:36:46,738 --> 00:36:48,740
Well, you picked a hell of a fucking time
762
00:36:48,740 --> 00:36:50,742
To tell me you're a fairy.
763
00:36:55,249 --> 00:36:58,253
As if i don't have enough to deal with.
764
00:36:58,253 --> 00:36:59,254
Geez.
765
00:37:02,758 --> 00:37:05,262
You're the one that should be dying, instead of me.
766
00:37:13,272 --> 00:37:16,276
But i'm not dying, you selfish old prick.
767
00:37:19,780 --> 00:37:20,782
You are.
768
00:37:33,298 --> 00:37:35,301
Aw, look at this guy. That's great.
769
00:37:35,301 --> 00:37:36,802
Hey, guys. Oh, my gosh.
770
00:37:36,802 --> 00:37:37,804
Sorry it took so long.
771
00:37:37,804 --> 00:37:39,306
Longer than i expected. Dad!
772
00:37:39,306 --> 00:37:40,308
What? You can't believe
773
00:37:40,308 --> 00:37:41,309
What michael and i found.
774
00:37:41,309 --> 00:37:43,312
Scorpionhead number 34!
775
00:37:43,812 --> 00:37:44,813
That's... that's great, hank.
776
00:37:44,813 --> 00:37:46,316
You owe me 150 bucks.
777
00:37:46,316 --> 00:37:47,317
Whoo!
778
00:37:47,317 --> 00:37:49,320
Oh, i'm gonna go page adam.
779
00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:50,321
He's a scorpionhead head, too. Wait, wait, wait.
780
00:37:50,820 --> 00:37:52,323
Wait a second. Tell me about... hold on, hold on.
781
00:37:52,323 --> 00:37:54,325
Hold on. Tell me about your day.
782
00:37:55,827 --> 00:37:57,330
We had a blast.
783
00:37:57,830 --> 00:37:58,331
Great.
784
00:37:59,832 --> 00:38:00,834
Ah, looks like it went off in here.
785
00:38:01,335 --> 00:38:02,836
And what about you? Did you see any, uh,
786
00:38:02,836 --> 00:38:03,838
Naked penguins?
787
00:38:03,838 --> 00:38:04,839
Yeah, just the one.
788
00:38:05,340 --> 00:38:06,342
So t-Tell me about the incline.
789
00:38:06,342 --> 00:38:07,343
Oh, well we, uh...
790
00:38:07,343 --> 00:38:09,846
we took a detour from the official itinerary
791
00:38:09,846 --> 00:38:11,348
And we went to comixland.
792
00:38:11,348 --> 00:38:12,849
What about all the things i had planned?
793
00:38:15,353 --> 00:38:16,854
Uh...
794
00:38:16,854 --> 00:38:18,357
you sat around here all day and read comics?
795
00:38:18,357 --> 00:38:19,858
It was what hank wanted.
796
00:38:21,361 --> 00:38:23,364
Don't take this the wrong way,
797
00:38:23,364 --> 00:38:27,369
But, he's not too crazy about the schedule.
798
00:38:27,369 --> 00:38:28,871
He doesn't understand why
799
00:38:28,871 --> 00:38:30,373
You have to drag him around every minute.
800
00:38:30,373 --> 00:38:31,374
Who's dragging him around?
801
00:38:31,374 --> 00:38:32,875
I just want him to have a good time.
802
00:38:32,875 --> 00:38:34,377
Well, maybe his idea of a good time
803
00:38:34,377 --> 00:38:35,879
Is different than yours
804
00:38:35,879 --> 00:38:37,882
And you didn't bother to find out what it was.
805
00:38:37,882 --> 00:38:39,384
Hey, don't tell me how to raise my son.
806
00:38:39,884 --> 00:38:41,387
I'm not! I just...
807
00:38:41,387 --> 00:38:42,888
I-I'm trying to help. Yeah, but all of a sudden
808
00:38:42,888 --> 00:38:44,391
You're a fucking authority?
809
00:38:44,391 --> 00:38:46,394
He's unhappy here. Oh.
810
00:38:46,394 --> 00:38:47,895
He wants to go home.
811
00:38:47,895 --> 00:38:49,398
And not because of the reasons that i thought,
812
00:38:49,398 --> 00:38:51,400
But because of... because of you.
813
00:38:52,902 --> 00:38:54,403
You're the problem.
814
00:39:34,456 --> 00:39:36,958
There are many pleasures to be found here.
815
00:39:38,961 --> 00:39:41,465
Places that you're afraid to even think of going.
816
00:39:44,969 --> 00:39:47,473
I can take you there.
817
00:39:47,473 --> 00:39:49,476
But first you must surrender to me.
818
00:39:49,976 --> 00:39:50,977
Completely.
819
00:39:53,981 --> 00:39:55,484
Do you surrender?
820
00:39:59,488 --> 00:40:00,990
Yes, i-I surrender.
821
00:40:00,990 --> 00:40:02,492
"Sir".
822
00:40:02,492 --> 00:40:04,495
You will call me "sir".
823
00:40:07,499 --> 00:40:08,500
Sir.
824
00:40:15,510 --> 00:40:18,012
And you are "slave".
825
00:40:27,525 --> 00:40:29,026
It's... it's kind of cold in here.
826
00:40:29,026 --> 00:40:30,529
I didn't say you could speak.
827
00:40:30,529 --> 00:40:32,030
I'm sorry. "Sir".
828
00:40:35,035 --> 00:40:36,036
I'm sorry, sir.
829
00:40:46,048 --> 00:40:47,551
Good slave.
830
00:40:48,051 --> 00:40:50,555
Now you will do exactly as you are told.
831
00:42:12,662 --> 00:42:14,163
So i thought this summer,
832
00:42:14,163 --> 00:42:15,666
We could go white water rafting.
833
00:42:15,666 --> 00:42:18,169
I'm going to baseball camp this summer.
834
00:42:18,169 --> 00:42:19,170
Oh. Well, th-That's good.
835
00:42:20,672 --> 00:42:21,674
Well, thanksgiving we could go hiking. Hiking...
836
00:42:21,674 --> 00:42:24,176
we're going to grandma and grandpa's.
837
00:42:24,677 --> 00:42:25,678
Okay, that takes us to christmas.
838
00:42:26,178 --> 00:42:26,679
Christmas we can go skiing.
839
00:42:27,180 --> 00:42:28,682
You just don't get it, do you?
840
00:42:40,197 --> 00:42:44,203
Michael told me you weren't having a very good time.
841
00:42:44,203 --> 00:42:45,704
And i didn't want to believe him.
842
00:42:47,707 --> 00:42:49,710
You know, i was just trying really hard to...
843
00:42:49,710 --> 00:42:52,212
that's just it, dad.
844
00:42:52,212 --> 00:42:53,715
You just try too hard.
845
00:42:54,215 --> 00:42:55,718
Yeah, i guess i do.
846
00:42:56,218 --> 00:42:58,220
I suppose that's because i don't get to see you very often.
847
00:42:58,220 --> 00:43:01,225
You live out there, and i'm back here.
848
00:43:01,225 --> 00:43:03,728
So for those few days that i'm lucky enough to have you,
849
00:43:04,229 --> 00:43:05,731
I just want it to be something special.
850
00:43:05,731 --> 00:43:08,233
Some... something.
851
00:43:09,234 --> 00:43:11,237
So you remember me.
852
00:43:11,237 --> 00:43:12,740
So you won't forget me.
853
00:43:13,741 --> 00:43:16,244
When i'm with you, i'm getting away from mom and gary
854
00:43:16,745 --> 00:43:19,749
And all that bullshit stress happens at school.
855
00:43:19,749 --> 00:43:22,753
And, i mean, i just want to hang out.
856
00:43:22,753 --> 00:43:25,256
Not have to worry about doing something
857
00:43:25,256 --> 00:43:27,258
Every single minute of my day.
858
00:43:30,763 --> 00:43:33,266
You mean just like lying around, reading comics?
859
00:43:35,770 --> 00:43:37,271
Yeah.
860
00:43:37,271 --> 00:43:39,274
I mean, if i feel like it.
861
00:43:41,778 --> 00:43:43,279
Is now ready for boarding.
862
00:43:45,783 --> 00:43:47,285
That's you.
863
00:43:47,285 --> 00:43:49,787
Call me tonight.
864
00:43:49,787 --> 00:43:51,790
No matter how late it is.
865
00:43:52,290 --> 00:43:53,793
Okay, i will.
866
00:43:55,796 --> 00:43:56,797
Bye, hank.
867
00:43:58,800 --> 00:43:59,801
Next.
868
00:43:59,801 --> 00:44:01,303
Thanks for the scorpionhead.
869
00:44:08,312 --> 00:44:09,312
Bye-Bye.
870
00:44:12,316 --> 00:44:13,819
Next person in line, please.
871
00:44:17,824 --> 00:44:20,327
You know, i actually don't mind being a stepmother.
872
00:44:22,330 --> 00:44:23,832
For someone who had never had a father,
873
00:44:23,832 --> 00:44:26,836
You sure know a lot about being one.
874
00:44:26,836 --> 00:44:28,338
Well, i just...
875
00:44:28,839 --> 00:44:31,842
imagined what i'd want him to act like, if i did.
876
00:44:33,845 --> 00:44:37,349
So, we've got the house all to ourself again.
877
00:44:37,349 --> 00:44:39,853
What do you feel like doing?
878
00:44:39,853 --> 00:44:43,357
I don't know, laundry? Bookkeeping?
879
00:44:43,357 --> 00:44:44,860
Try again, stud.
880
00:44:47,864 --> 00:44:49,365
I mean, you gave me your word.
881
00:44:49,365 --> 00:44:51,367
You swore i could trust you with him.
882
00:44:52,368 --> 00:44:55,372
Look, your ex already reamed me out.
883
00:44:55,372 --> 00:44:57,375
Well, now it's my turn.
884
00:44:57,375 --> 00:44:58,878
You said you wanted to be his parent.
885
00:44:58,878 --> 00:45:00,379
If that's true, then fucking well be one.
886
00:45:00,379 --> 00:45:03,383
But don't tell me you'll be there for him when you're not.
887
00:45:03,383 --> 00:45:04,886
When you've never been there for anyone else
888
00:45:04,886 --> 00:45:05,887
Other than yourself.
889
00:45:05,887 --> 00:45:07,890
Hey, sonny-Boy.
890
00:45:07,890 --> 00:45:08,891
Anyone home?
891
00:45:12,895 --> 00:45:13,897
What are you doing here?
892
00:45:13,897 --> 00:45:15,398
I'll only be a minute.
893
00:45:17,401 --> 00:45:19,905
I found something when i was going through those boxes.
894
00:45:19,905 --> 00:45:22,408
I thought you might want it.
895
00:45:22,408 --> 00:45:25,913
That's me and you when you were four months old.
896
00:45:27,415 --> 00:45:29,417
Why are you smiling?
897
00:45:29,417 --> 00:45:31,921
It's a photograph. Isn't that what you're supposed to do?
898
00:45:31,921 --> 00:45:32,922
I don't want it.
899
00:45:34,924 --> 00:45:36,426
You might change your mind one day, when i'm gone.
900
00:45:38,930 --> 00:45:39,931
I doubt it.
901
00:45:42,935 --> 00:45:45,438
You know, you can really pack a wallop for a fag.
902
00:45:47,441 --> 00:45:50,445
Just don't tell your mother, you understand?
903
00:45:50,445 --> 00:45:53,449
She'll be at fucking mass three times a day praying...
904
00:45:54,950 --> 00:45:56,452
Mr. Kinney.
905
00:45:57,954 --> 00:46:01,458
You probably don't remember me. But... i'm lindsay.
906
00:46:02,961 --> 00:46:05,965
Petersen. Course i remember you.
907
00:46:05,965 --> 00:46:06,966
Although it's been a...
908
00:46:06,966 --> 00:46:09,469
a long time.
909
00:46:09,469 --> 00:46:10,972
You're still a looker.
910
00:46:10,972 --> 00:46:11,973
Thank you, mr. Kinney.
911
00:46:11,973 --> 00:46:13,976
Jack.
912
00:46:13,976 --> 00:46:15,977
What, do you still think you're a ladies' man?
913
00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:21,986
You have yourself a beautiful son.
914
00:46:22,486 --> 00:46:22,987
Yeah.
915
00:46:25,991 --> 00:46:27,493
Well, i guess i'll be on my way.
916
00:46:29,495 --> 00:46:31,498
There's someone else i want you to say hello to.
917
00:46:38,006 --> 00:46:39,008
Your grandson.
918
00:46:41,010 --> 00:46:42,012
My grandson?
919
00:46:47,018 --> 00:46:48,520
What the fuck's going on?
920
00:46:50,022 --> 00:46:52,025
Are you screwing with me, sonny-Boy?
921
00:46:52,025 --> 00:46:53,527
No, i'm not screwing with you.
922
00:46:57,032 --> 00:46:59,034
Jack, would you like to hold him?
923
00:47:00,535 --> 00:47:02,538
Oh, i...
924
00:47:02,538 --> 00:47:05,542
it's been a while, you know, since i held a baby, but...
925
00:47:07,544 --> 00:47:08,546
yeah.
926
00:47:15,555 --> 00:47:16,557
Hi.
927
00:47:24,566 --> 00:47:27,070
Gus.
928
00:47:27,070 --> 00:47:29,073
His name's gus.
929
00:47:29,073 --> 00:47:31,076
Gus.
64315
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