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1
00:00:06,307 --> 00:00:08,779
WHAT'S WRONG, HONEY?
2
00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:12,743
I FORGOT
WHY I CAME DOWNSTAIRS.
3
00:00:14,445 --> 00:00:16,446
TO APOLOGIZE TO YOUR WIFE
4
00:00:16,447 --> 00:00:19,089
FOR YEARS
OF BOORISH BEHAVIOR?
5
00:00:19,090 --> 00:00:21,551
NO.
6
00:00:21,552 --> 00:00:25,125
APOLOGIZE TO ME
FOR YEARS OF BOORISH BEHAVIOR?
7
00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:29,429
MM, NO,
DOESN'T SOUND LIKE ME.
8
00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:31,631
WELL, HONEY,
WHAT WERE YOU DOING?
9
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:34,034
I WAS FLOSSING.
10
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:38,368
I WAS!
11
00:00:38,369 --> 00:00:40,510
OKAY. WHILE YOU WERE FLOSSING,
12
00:00:40,511 --> 00:00:43,413
YOU REALIZED THE FLOSS
WASN'T SHREDDING IN YOUR TEETH,
13
00:00:43,414 --> 00:00:46,516
WHICH MEANT I BOUGHT THE BRAND
ONLY MILLIONAIRES CAN AFFORD,
14
00:00:46,517 --> 00:00:49,519
WHICH LED YOU TO THINK
ABOUT ALL THE OTHER WAYS
15
00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:51,521
THAT MONEY IS THROWN AWAY
AROUND THIS HOUSE,
16
00:00:51,522 --> 00:00:53,523
SO YOU STARTED
WANDERING AROUND UPSTAIRS,
17
00:00:53,524 --> 00:00:55,825
TURNING DOWN THE THERMOSTAT
AND TURNING OFF LIGHTS.
18
00:00:55,826 --> 00:00:57,827
WHILE YOU WERE PACKING
A BAG OF KYLE'S CLOTHES
19
00:00:57,828 --> 00:01:00,059
TO SELL AT THE SWAP MEET,
20
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:02,061
YOU REMEMBERED THAT RUBY SAID
SHE DROPPED A HANDFUL OF COINS
21
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:05,064
IN THE KITCHEN AND A QUARTER HAD
ROLLED BEHIND THE REFRIGERATOR,
22
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:08,469
SO YOU CAME DOWNSTAIRS
TO MOVE THE FRIDGE TO GET IT.
23
00:01:11,672 --> 00:01:14,605
THANK YOU.
24
00:01:16,807 --> 00:01:19,810
♪♪♪
25
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:29,119
ALL RIGHT, GRACIE, COME ON,
BLOW OUT THE CANDLES.
26
00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,591
WELL, WE SHOULD WAIT
FOR UNCLE ANDY'S DATE.
27
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,824
OH, WAIT.
CANDLES DON'T BURN THAT LONG.
28
00:01:34,825 --> 00:01:37,397
THE SUN WON'T BURN
THAT LONG.
29
00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:41,171
YEP, I'VE GOT NO DATE.
VERY FUNNY.
30
00:01:41,172 --> 00:01:43,173
YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE
I DON'T HAVE?
31
00:01:43,174 --> 00:01:45,435
A GIFT
FOR MY SNIDE YOUNG NIECE.
32
00:01:45,436 --> 00:01:49,139
HOW'S THAT CRAP SANDWICH TASTE,
BIRTHDAY ANGEL?
33
00:01:49,140 --> 00:01:51,581
AAH! OW, OW!
34
00:01:51,582 --> 00:01:53,843
ANDY, NICE JOB.
35
00:01:53,844 --> 00:01:56,886
YOU JUST GOT BEAT UP
BY A 10 YEAR OLD.
36
00:01:56,887 --> 00:02:00,520
SHE'S 11.
37
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:03,824
JUST IGNORE WHAT I WROTE
IN YOUR CARD, GRACIE.
38
00:02:05,796 --> 00:02:08,828
COME ON, SWEETIE. BLOW OUT
THE CANDLES. MAKE A WISH.
39
00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:11,431
HEY,
THIS HOUSE IS ROCKIN'...
40
00:02:11,432 --> 00:02:15,165
SO WE'RE NOT KNOCKIN'!
41
00:02:15,166 --> 00:02:17,467
YOU WISHED FOR THE DEVLINS?
42
00:02:17,468 --> 00:02:19,869
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
43
00:02:19,870 --> 00:02:21,871
TIM, CINDY,
WE WEREN'T EXPECTING YOU.
44
00:02:21,872 --> 00:02:24,544
YEAH, OTHERWISE,
WE WOULD HAVE LOCKED THE DOOR.
45
00:02:24,545 --> 00:02:27,177
(both laugh)
46
00:02:27,178 --> 00:02:28,718
HEY, TIMMY TIMMY KOKO BOP,
47
00:02:28,719 --> 00:02:30,250
LOOKS LIKE WE'RE JUST IN TIME
FOR A B-DAY PARTY.
48
00:02:30,251 --> 00:02:33,483
I SEE THAT,
PIRATES OF THE CINDI-BBEAN.
49
00:02:33,484 --> 00:02:36,426
LUCKILY, I ALWAYS TRAVEL
WITH A PARTY IN MY PANTS.
50
00:02:36,427 --> 00:02:38,588
(all) UGH!
51
00:02:38,589 --> 00:02:41,592
(horn tooting)
52
00:02:43,434 --> 00:02:45,595
OKAY, GRACIE, I'M GONNA
RELIGHT THESE CANDLES,
53
00:02:45,596 --> 00:02:49,269
AND YOU MAKE A WISH
FOR THEM TO LEAVE.
54
00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:52,202
TIM, CINDY, WE'RE KIND OF
IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING,
55
00:02:52,203 --> 00:02:54,944
SO I DON'T WANT TO
BE RUDE... I WILL. GO!
56
00:02:54,945 --> 00:02:56,946
(laughing)
57
00:02:56,947 --> 00:02:59,879
DON'T MIND US, RIGHT?
IT'S LIKE WE'RE NOT EVEN HERE.
58
00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:03,353
YEAH, SURE,
UNTIL CAPTAIN BANANA HAMMOCK
59
00:03:03,354 --> 00:03:05,915
RIPS OFF HIS PANTS.
60
00:03:05,916 --> 00:03:08,758
OOH! YIKES, DANA,
61
00:03:08,759 --> 00:03:10,860
YOU MIGHT WANNA
LAY OFF THE CAKE.
62
00:03:10,861 --> 00:03:14,224
LOOKS LIKE IT WASN'T ALL BABY
IN THAT TUM-TUM-TUMMY.
63
00:03:14,225 --> 00:03:17,196
I AM 5 POUNDS
OVER MY PRE-BABY WEIGHT.
64
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,769
WELL, HOW COME ANDY LOOKS
LIKE THE SKINNY ONE, HMM?
65
00:03:19,770 --> 00:03:22,702
(giggles)
66
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:24,874
HEY, I GOT A RIDDLE
FOR YOU GUYS.
67
00:03:24,875 --> 00:03:27,837
OOH, WE LOVE RIDDLES!
YEAH, WHAT IS IT? GO, GO!
68
00:03:27,838 --> 00:03:31,210
WHAT WEARS
MATCHING TRACK SUITS
69
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:34,344
AND NEEDS
TO GET OUTTA MY HOUSE?
70
00:03:34,345 --> 00:03:36,416
(both laugh)
71
00:03:36,417 --> 00:03:37,987
BURNED!
72
00:03:37,988 --> 00:03:41,291
TO A CRISP! OW!
73
00:03:41,292 --> 00:03:43,853
YOU JUST CRACK US UP.
IT'S GONNA BE REALLY HARD
74
00:03:43,854 --> 00:03:47,357
FOR ONE OF US
TO NEVER SEE YOU EVER AGAIN.
75
00:03:47,358 --> 00:03:49,859
I'M LISTENING.
76
00:03:49,860 --> 00:03:51,731
I'LL START, I'LL
START. WE... ARE...
77
00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:53,232
GET...
TING...
78
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,704
A...
DI...
79
00:03:54,705 --> 00:03:57,437
VORCE.
(gasps) DIVORCE?
80
00:03:57,438 --> 00:04:00,940
THIS IS
MY BEST BIRTHDAY EVER.
81
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:03,613
THE LAWYER TOLD US TO DIVIDE
EVERYTHING IN HALF.
82
00:04:03,614 --> 00:04:06,746
EVEN THE BAD...
NEWS.
83
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,518
YOU GUYS JUST SEEMED
SO RIGHT FOR EACH OTHER
84
00:04:08,519 --> 00:04:10,280
AND WRONG FOR ANYONE ELSE.
85
00:04:10,281 --> 00:04:11,551
TRUE.
86
00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:13,983
BUT WE'VE ALREADY WORKED OUT
THE DIVORCE SETTLEMENT.
87
00:04:13,984 --> 00:04:16,926
WHO GETS THE 3,000
MATCHING TRACKSUITS?
88
00:04:16,927 --> 00:04:20,431
HEY, DO YOU WANT 'EM? 'CAUSE
THEY'LL STRETCH TO COVER THAT.
89
00:04:23,894 --> 00:04:26,466
BUT WE JUST CAN'T DECIDE
90
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:29,999
WHO SHOULD GET OUR TWO BESTEST
FRIENDS IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
91
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,941
JESUS AND SANTA?
92
00:04:31,942 --> 00:04:34,774
NO, SILLY.
93
00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:37,577
M.C. CHERYL
AND D.J. JAZZY JIM.
94
00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:39,979
SO WE DECIDED
TO HAVE YOU PICK.
95
00:04:39,980 --> 00:04:41,911
WHO DO YOU WANNA
BE FRIENDS WITH, HUH?
96
00:04:41,912 --> 00:04:44,454
ARE WE ALLOWED TO PICK...
NEITHER?
97
00:04:44,455 --> 00:04:47,917
STOP BEING
SUCH A GIGGLE PUSS.
98
00:04:47,918 --> 00:04:52,422
NOW WHO DO YOU WANT?
HOT TIMES SUMMER IN THE CINDY?
99
00:04:52,423 --> 00:04:55,366
OR THE HUNT
FOR RED OC-TIM-BER?
100
00:05:01,532 --> 00:05:04,003
UH, I CHOOSE CINDY.
101
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:07,007
YEAH, YEAH.
CINDY. CINDY'LL BE FINE.
102
00:05:09,340 --> 00:05:13,012
10-LETTER WORD
FOR FLYING REPTILE.
103
00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:16,015
IS IT ACROSS OR DOWN?
DOWN.
104
00:05:16,016 --> 00:05:19,419
HUH. I DON'T DO DOWN.
NEVER HAVE, NEVER WILL.
105
00:05:19,420 --> 00:05:24,494
HEY, HEY, HEY! WHAT DO YOU SAY
ON THIS FINE, FINE DAY?
106
00:05:24,495 --> 00:05:27,927
I SAY THE SAME THING I SAID
YESTERDAY AND THE DAY BEFORE...
107
00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:29,929
GET OUT AND STAY OUT.
108
00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:31,831
(laughs)
109
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,332
YOU'RE ALWAYS ON.
110
00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,905
OH, I LOVE IT.
111
00:05:35,906 --> 00:05:39,409
OH, THIS PLACE IS FUN,
EVEN FOR A GAY DIVORCéE...
112
00:05:39,410 --> 00:05:42,412
(gasps) OH, ANDY, I'M SORRY.
I DIDN'T MEAN TO OFFEND YOU.
113
00:05:42,413 --> 00:05:44,414
I MEAN THE HAPPY GAY,
114
00:05:44,415 --> 00:05:46,976
NOT THE DISCO DANCING,
LEATHER PANTS GAY.
115
00:05:46,977 --> 00:05:51,521
HAVING LEATHER PANTS
DOESN'T MAKE... I'M NOT GAY.
116
00:05:51,522 --> 00:05:54,084
REALLY?
THEN EXPLAIN THE HAIRCUT.
117
00:05:55,926 --> 00:05:58,928
WELL, I'M GONNA
GO TO THE KITCHEN.
118
00:05:58,929 --> 00:06:00,930
WHY?
119
00:06:00,931 --> 00:06:02,933
WHY?
120
00:06:07,738 --> 00:06:09,839
I'M OUT OF BEER.
121
00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:12,001
JIM...
122
00:06:12,002 --> 00:06:14,974
FREEZE, BLONDIE!
123
00:06:14,975 --> 00:06:18,047
WHERE DO YOU THINK
YOU'RE GOING?
124
00:06:18,048 --> 00:06:20,109
THE PHARMACY.
YOU WENT THERE YESTERDAY.
125
00:06:20,110 --> 00:06:22,752
AT THE BANK.
IT'S CLOSED.
126
00:06:22,753 --> 00:06:24,984
MEXICO?
127
00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:27,487
CHERYL, IF YOU'RE
GONNA GO TO MEXICO,
128
00:06:27,488 --> 00:06:29,959
THE LEAST YOU COULD DO
IS KILL ME FIRST.
129
00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:34,694
YOU'RE RIGHT. I CAN'T
LEAVE YOU HERE ALONE.
130
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:38,028
(sighs)
131
00:06:43,774 --> 00:06:45,775
OH, DAMN,
WE'RE OUTTA BEER.
132
00:06:45,776 --> 00:06:48,077
I GOTTA GO TO THE STORE
AND GET SOME MORE.
133
00:06:48,078 --> 00:06:49,979
FREEZE.
134
00:06:49,980 --> 00:06:52,742
LOOK, HONEY,
THIS CAN'T LAST FOREVER.
135
00:06:52,743 --> 00:06:55,715
I MEAN, CINDY'S LONELY
RIGHT NOW, BUT PRETTY SOON
136
00:06:55,716 --> 00:06:58,718
SHE'LL LATCH ONTO SOME POOR SAP
AND BE OUT OF OUR LIVES FOREVER.
137
00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:00,990
OH, DO YOU PROMISE?
YES, HONEY, I PROMISE.
138
00:07:00,991 --> 00:07:02,892
HOW DID WE EVER
GET INTO THIS?
139
00:07:02,893 --> 00:07:04,894
OF COURSE I PROMISE. YOU JUST GOTTA
RELAX. JUST CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE...
140
00:07:04,895 --> 00:07:06,897
(both gasp)
141
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:11,731
(both) AAH!
142
00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:14,734
(both) AAH!
143
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:17,867
(laughing)
144
00:07:17,868 --> 00:07:20,671
(crying)
145
00:07:28,819 --> 00:07:30,920
HEY, CHERYL, CHECK IT OUT.
THREE WEEKS LATER,
146
00:07:30,921 --> 00:07:33,723
AND I'M ALREADY BACK
IN MY PRE-PREGNANCY PANTS.
147
00:07:33,724 --> 00:07:35,526
OH...
148
00:07:39,690 --> 00:07:42,692
I DON'T MEAN TO BRAG,
BUT ON THE WAY OVER HERE,
149
00:07:42,693 --> 00:07:47,066
A CONSTRUCTION WORKER
TOTALLY WHISTLED AT ME.
150
00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:49,999
UM, HONEY, ARE THOSE
YOUR PREGNANCY UNDERWEAR?
151
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:52,001
WHAT?
152
00:07:52,002 --> 00:07:55,004
YEAH, I CAN SEE
YOUR WHOLE BACKYARD.
153
00:07:55,005 --> 00:07:58,047
YEAH, YOU MIGHT WANNA
GO BORROW SOME SWEATS.
154
00:07:58,048 --> 00:08:00,080
I WENT TO THE MALL.
AW...
155
00:08:03,914 --> 00:08:06,856
HI, HONEY.
HOW WAS YOUR DAY?
156
00:08:06,857 --> 00:08:10,890
HELL.
CHERYL, HELL, PURE HELL.
157
00:08:10,891 --> 00:08:12,922
ANDY, ON MONDAY,
158
00:08:12,923 --> 00:08:15,224
JUST CHATTERED ALL DAY LONG
ABOUT CINDY.
159
00:08:15,225 --> 00:08:17,026
OH, THAT'S CUTE.
160
00:08:17,027 --> 00:08:19,529
TUESDAY WAS
"TAKE CINDY TO WORK DAY,"
161
00:08:19,530 --> 00:08:20,700
SWEET!
162
00:08:20,701 --> 00:08:23,603
AND TODAY WAS
"TAKE CINDY AT WORK DAY."
163
00:08:23,604 --> 00:08:26,105
ALL RIGHT,
THAT I DID NOT NEED TO HEAR.
164
00:08:26,106 --> 00:08:29,508
HEAR?
I HAD TO WALK IN ON IT.
165
00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:31,841
JIM, IT'S NEW LOVE.
166
00:08:31,842 --> 00:08:34,614
NO, IT'S NOT, CHERYL.
IT'S A DISEASE.
167
00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:36,045
OH...
168
00:08:36,046 --> 00:08:38,648
ANDY'S CHANGED.
HE'S CHANGED THE WAY HE WALKS,
169
00:08:38,649 --> 00:08:41,691
THE WAY HE TALKS, THE WAY HE'S
DRESSED. HE'S BECOMING A DEVLIN.
170
00:08:41,692 --> 00:08:44,854
OH, YOU'RE ACTING LIKE HE'S
POSSESSED. HE IS POSSESSED.
171
00:08:44,855 --> 00:08:48,658
HEY, HEY, HEY!
172
00:08:48,659 --> 00:08:52,101
WHAT DO YOU SAY
ON THIS FINE, FINE DAY?
173
00:08:52,102 --> 00:08:54,864
HEY, YOU TWO.
SORRY ABOUT HOGGING
174
00:08:54,865 --> 00:08:57,667
THE SPACE SHUTTLE "ATLANDY"
THIS WEEK.
175
00:08:57,668 --> 00:09:00,841
OH, WE'LL MAKE IT UP TO 'EM,
SALT LAKE CINDY.
176
00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:04,814
WE, UH, WANTED
TO INVITE YOU TWO CATS...
177
00:09:04,815 --> 00:09:06,115
(making meowing sounds)
178
00:09:06,116 --> 00:09:09,278
(growling)
179
00:09:09,279 --> 00:09:11,881
(laughs) OVER TO MY PLACE
TO DO SOME HOT TUBBING
180
00:09:11,882 --> 00:09:14,323
AND APOLOGIZE
FOR BEING SUCH STRANGERS.
181
00:09:14,324 --> 00:09:18,057
OH, YEAH. I DON'T THINK WE'RE GONNA
BE ABLE TO MAKE THAT. WHY NOT?
182
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:20,059
I HAVE NO DESIRE TO GO.
183
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:22,662
(both laugh)
184
00:09:22,663 --> 00:09:26,696
OF COURSE WE'LL COME
TO YOUR PARTY. CHERYL...
185
00:09:26,697 --> 00:09:30,800
NOW IF ONLY I COULD REMEMBER
WHAT TIME THE PARTY STARTS.
186
00:09:30,801 --> 00:09:32,943
I KNOW.
187
00:09:43,353 --> 00:09:46,285
HEY, SHOW HIM
THE NUMBER TO R.S.V.P.
188
00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:49,288
I KNOW THE PHONE NUMBER!
I KNOW THE PHONE NUMBER!
189
00:09:49,289 --> 00:09:51,961
(laughs) HUH?
190
00:09:51,962 --> 00:09:54,063
HEY, LET'S TAKE THIS PARTY
OVER TO YOUR PLACE.
191
00:09:54,064 --> 00:09:57,967
CAN I HAVE A PIGGYBACK RIDE? NO,
BUT YOU CAN HAVE A PIGGY-FRONT RIDE.
192
00:09:57,968 --> 00:10:00,870
WHOO!
OINK, OINK!
193
00:10:00,871 --> 00:10:04,034
OINK, OINK, OINK!
ALL THE WAY HOME.
194
00:10:05,836 --> 00:10:10,109
I HAVE AN EXCUSE FOR MY BUTT
HANGING OUT. WHAT'S HIS?
195
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,981
THAT'S IT, CHERYL.
PUT A POT OF COFFEE ON.
196
00:10:11,982 --> 00:10:14,684
I'M GETTING
A PIECE OF PAPER AND A PEN,
197
00:10:14,685 --> 00:10:16,315
AND WE'RE GONNA MAP OUT
198
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:18,317
A STRATEGY
TO BREAK THOSE TWO UP.
199
00:10:18,318 --> 00:10:21,620
NO, NO, NO, NO, NOBODY'S
BREAKING ANYBODY UP.
200
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:24,353
ANDY IS FAMILY, AND IF
HE'S HAPPY, WE SHOULD BE HAPPY.
201
00:10:24,354 --> 00:10:26,255
HAPPY?
HOW CAN WE BE HAPPY?
202
00:10:26,256 --> 00:10:28,097
HE'S DATING SOMEONE
WE TOTALLY HATE.
203
00:10:28,098 --> 00:10:29,959
WHAT WORLD DO YOU LIVE IN?
204
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:32,001
THE SAME WORLD
I'VE BEEN TRAPPED IN
205
00:10:32,002 --> 00:10:35,004
SINCE THE FIRST DAY
YOU TWO MET.
206
00:10:35,005 --> 00:10:37,767
ONLY ANDY DECIDES
WHO HE DATES.
207
00:10:37,768 --> 00:10:40,770
YEAH, I AGREE, BUT THE GUY
THAT JUST PRANCED OUT OF HERE
208
00:10:40,771 --> 00:10:43,743
SQUEALING LIKE A PIG
IS NOT ANDY.
209
00:10:43,744 --> 00:10:45,414
NO, IT'S LIKE
A ZOMBIE MOVIE.
210
00:10:45,415 --> 00:10:47,416
YOU KNOW, WE SHOULD
CUT OFF HIS HEAD
211
00:10:47,417 --> 00:10:50,319
AND BURN IT IN A DITCH. JIM, YOU
KNOW WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO?
212
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:53,652
WE'RE GONNA GO TO THAT PARTY,
AND YOU'RE GONNA BEHAVE,
213
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:57,056
AND IT'S GONNA BE OVER
BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.
214
00:10:57,057 --> 00:10:59,258
HONEY, ANDY'S RELATIONSHIPS
ARE LIKE HIS DIET...
215
00:10:59,259 --> 00:11:02,661
OVER BY LUNCH AND FOLLOWED
BY DAYS OF SHAME.
216
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,995
NOPE, I'M STICKING
TO MY PLAN AND MY MAP.
217
00:11:05,996 --> 00:11:07,296
HERE WE GO.
218
00:11:07,297 --> 00:11:10,139
HERE'S ANDY'S HOUSE.
HERE'S HIS MAILBOX,
219
00:11:10,140 --> 00:11:13,142
AND HERE'S A COBRA.
220
00:11:13,143 --> 00:11:16,807
YOU KNOW WHAT? EVERYTHING
LOOKS LIKE ANDY'S BUTT NOW.
221
00:11:34,294 --> 00:11:38,027
SO, UH, RUBY GOT AN "A"
ON HER HISTORY TEST.
222
00:11:38,028 --> 00:11:41,031
THAT'S JUST TERRIFIC.
223
00:11:44,735 --> 00:11:46,475
YOU KNOW WHAT, CHERYL?
224
00:11:46,476 --> 00:11:48,477
I CAN REACH BACK,
GRAB THAT CD PLAYER,
225
00:11:48,478 --> 00:11:51,911
YANK IT IN THE WATER
AND END THIS NOW. OH...
226
00:11:51,912 --> 00:11:55,985
WHOO! (laughs)
227
00:11:55,986 --> 00:11:58,117
LOOK AT US, HUH, BUDDY?
228
00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:01,922
WE GOT US A COUPLE FOXY LADIES,
DON'T WE, JIM?
229
00:12:04,895 --> 00:12:08,758
YOU LOOK REALLY GOOD
IN THAT BATHING SUIT, CHERYL.
230
00:12:08,759 --> 00:12:12,361
AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU LET ME
WAX YOU? DID I REALLY LET YOU,
231
00:12:12,362 --> 00:12:15,734
OR DID YOU SNEAK UP ON ME
WHILE I WAS NAPPING?
232
00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,506
YEP, SHE'S A SNEAKY ONE.
233
00:12:17,507 --> 00:12:20,940
(laughs)
CAUGHT ME YESTERDAY.
234
00:12:20,941 --> 00:12:24,974
TELL YOU ONE THING,
YOU WAKE UP REFRESHED...
235
00:12:24,975 --> 00:12:26,876
REFRESHED
AND SLICK AS A WHISTLE.
236
00:12:26,877 --> 00:12:28,878
OH, ANDY.
237
00:12:28,879 --> 00:12:30,980
HEY, I GOT AN IDEA.
238
00:12:30,981 --> 00:12:33,182
WHY DON'T WE SEE
WHICH ONE OF YOU GUYS
239
00:12:33,183 --> 00:12:35,855
CAN HOLD THEIR BREATH THE
LONGEST? OH! SOUNDS LIKE A HOOT!
240
00:12:35,856 --> 00:12:37,156
STARTING NOW! OH, YEAH!
241
00:12:37,157 --> 00:12:40,029
CHERYL, CHERYL, CAN'T YOU SEE
WE HAVE TO BREAK THEM UP?
242
00:12:40,030 --> 00:12:42,531
OH, YOU ARE NOT BREAKING
THEM UP. THEY'RE IN LOVE,
243
00:12:42,532 --> 00:12:44,763
AND IT'S NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.
YES, IT IS OUR BUSINESS.
244
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:47,466
HE'S MY BEST FRIEND,
AND SHE IS GONNA RUIN HIS LIFE.
245
00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:49,999
YOU KNOW WHAT SOME PEOPLE
SAID TO ME ABOUT YOU?
246
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:52,471
AND IF I'D LISTENED,
WE WOULD NOT BE HERE TODAY.
247
00:12:52,472 --> 00:12:55,474
WELL, YOU SHOULD'VE LISTENED.
YOU COULD'VE DONE MUCH BETTER.
248
00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:57,006
WHO WON?
249
00:12:57,007 --> 00:13:00,980
IT WAS A TIE.
DO OVER.
250
00:13:00,981 --> 00:13:04,513
I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM HAPPIER.
BACK OFF.
251
00:13:04,514 --> 00:13:07,456
I'M NOT GONNA BACK OFF.
I'M NOT GONNA BACK OFF.
252
00:13:07,457 --> 00:13:09,959
I WANT MY BUDDY BACK
THE WAY HE WAS.
253
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:12,492
WHAT, PATHETIC AND ALONE?
YES! I LOVE THAT GUY.
254
00:13:14,064 --> 00:13:16,966
WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO SAY
UNDER THERE?
255
00:13:16,967 --> 00:13:20,399
I SAID,
"WILL YOU MARRY ME?"
256
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:21,971
(gasps)
257
00:13:21,972 --> 00:13:25,175
MARRY YOU?
THAT SEEMS KINDA QUICK...
258
00:13:26,536 --> 00:13:29,939
BUT NOT AS QUICK AS THIS...
OF-COURSE-I'LL-MARRY-YOU-
259
00:13:29,940 --> 00:13:33,983
I-LOVE-YOU-SO-MUCH-HAVE...
MY-CHILDREN-LET'S-START-NOW!
260
00:13:33,984 --> 00:13:36,345
NO, NO, NO.
NOW THEY'RE GETTING MARRIED!
261
00:13:36,346 --> 00:13:38,247
SHE IS THE DEVIL.
JIM...
262
00:13:38,248 --> 00:13:40,990
NO, SHE IS. THAT'S WHY
SHE WEARS THAT BATHING CAP...
263
00:13:40,991 --> 00:13:42,992
SHE'S HIDING HER HORNS.
264
00:13:42,993 --> 00:13:45,824
(both gasping)
265
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:47,556
OKAY, I ADMIT SHE'S
ANNOYING... SHE IS.
266
00:13:47,557 --> 00:13:48,898
BUT IF ANDY LOVES
HER, I LOVE HER. CHERYL...
267
00:13:48,899 --> 00:13:51,961
I THINK
SHE'S LICKING MY LEG.
268
00:13:51,962 --> 00:13:53,832
THAT COULD BE ANDY.
269
00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:55,906
OH, AND THAT'S BETTER?
270
00:13:57,968 --> 00:14:02,111
(gasps) IS THAT
ANDY'S BATHING SUIT?
271
00:14:02,112 --> 00:14:05,075
FIRST DIBS ON THE SHOWER.
RACE YOU!
272
00:14:13,523 --> 00:14:17,086
(laughs)
273
00:14:17,087 --> 00:14:19,388
DANA! OH, DANA,
274
00:14:19,389 --> 00:14:24,263
DO YOU WANT TO SPLIT
ANOTHER PAIR OF PANTS?
275
00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:27,436
LET ME TELL YOU HOW I KEEP
MY DERRIERE EXTRAORDINAIRE.
276
00:14:27,437 --> 00:14:29,999
I CLENCH MY GLUTES NONSTOP
DURING DINNER.
277
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:32,001
WATCH ME NOW.
CLENCH, RELEASE.
278
00:14:32,002 --> 00:14:33,973
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,
CAN I FEEL? YEAH.
279
00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:35,975
CLENCH...
RELEASE...
280
00:14:35,976 --> 00:14:37,646
CLENCH...
281
00:14:37,647 --> 00:14:40,109
WHOA, WHOA, RELEASE.
282
00:14:40,110 --> 00:14:43,552
I CAN BEND A FORK
BETWEEN MY CHEEKS.
283
00:14:43,553 --> 00:14:45,484
JIM, LEND ME YOUR FORK.
OH, SURE.
284
00:14:45,485 --> 00:14:48,017
NO! CHERYL, IF I HAVE
TO PUT UP WITH HER,
285
00:14:48,018 --> 00:14:50,019
AT LEAST LET ME
SEE THE SHOW. HERE YOU GO.
286
00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:51,660
(doorbell rings)
I'LL GET IT.
287
00:14:51,661 --> 00:14:53,993
NO, I'LL GET IT.
NO, NO, I'LL GET IT.
288
00:14:53,994 --> 00:14:55,494
LET ME GET IT.
I'LL GET IT.
289
00:14:55,495 --> 00:14:57,496
YOU KNOW, I COULDN'T TAKE
ANOTHER SECOND IN THERE.
290
00:14:57,497 --> 00:15:01,030
I KNOW. THE LAST THING I NEED IS
FOR ANOTHER ONE OF MY SIBLINGS
291
00:15:01,031 --> 00:15:03,502
TO MARRY SOMEONE I CAN'T STAND.
HOW DO YOU PUT UP WITH IT?
292
00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:07,036
OH, WE'VE GOT TO HAVE THEM
BREAK UP. I GOT A PLAN RIGHT NOW.
293
00:15:07,037 --> 00:15:09,078
WHAT? TIM DEVLIN!
294
00:15:09,079 --> 00:15:12,241
YOU'RE BRILLIANT. HEY, IT'S
NOT MY FIRST RODEO, BABY.
295
00:15:12,242 --> 00:15:15,184
HEY. HERE'S THOSE HOT TUB
PAMPHLETS YOU WANTED.
296
00:15:15,185 --> 00:15:17,616
DON'T KNOW WHY YOU NEEDED THEM
AT EXACTLY 7:30,
297
00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:19,618
BUT THERE YOU GO, JIM.
298
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:23,022
WELL, THANK YOU. DON'T YOU MEAN,
"JIM JACOB JINGLEHEIMER SCHMIDT?"
299
00:15:23,023 --> 00:15:25,995
YOU KNOW, THE CUTESY NICKNAMES
WERE KIND OF CINDY'S THING.
300
00:15:25,996 --> 00:15:29,598
SINCE WE'VE SPLIT UP,
I'VE TRIED TO BE A LITTLE LESS...
301
00:15:29,599 --> 00:15:31,961
LIKE SOMEONE YOU WANNA STRANGLE?
GOOD ONE. I'VE ALWAYS LIKED YOU, JIM.
302
00:15:31,962 --> 00:15:34,463
HA HA, AND I'VE NEVER LIKED YOU.
COME ON IN.
303
00:15:34,464 --> 00:15:37,006
UH, LISTEN, UH, THE REASON
I BROUGHT YOU HERE
304
00:15:37,007 --> 00:15:40,009
IS BECAUSE I WANTED YOU TO KNOW,
FROM US, FROM THE FAMILY,
305
00:15:40,010 --> 00:15:43,372
THAT ANDY AND CINDY
ARE ENGAGED.
306
00:15:43,373 --> 00:15:46,145
WOW. YEAH, THEY'RE
GETTING MARRIED NEXT WEEK.
307
00:15:46,146 --> 00:15:49,018
THAT'S TERRIBLE! I KNOW. THAT'S WHY I
WANTED YOU TO COME BACK, BECAUSE WE THINK
308
00:15:49,019 --> 00:15:52,051
YOU SHOULD GO IN THERE AND
FIGHT FOR YOUR WOMAN. YEAH.
309
00:15:52,052 --> 00:15:54,553
NO, I MEAN IT'S TERRIBLE,
BECAUSE I'M GONNA BE
310
00:15:54,554 --> 00:15:58,127
OUT OF TOWN NEXT WEEK. SIENNA AND I
ARE GOING TO MAUI. (Jim and Dana) SIENNA?
311
00:15:58,128 --> 00:16:00,089
NEW GIRLFRIEND.
SWIMSUIT MODEL.
312
00:16:00,090 --> 00:16:04,133
I'M OLDER, GOT A LITTLE MONEY.
IT'S NOT THAT HARD, JIM.
313
00:16:04,134 --> 00:16:06,095
COME HERE.
314
00:16:06,096 --> 00:16:11,500
THAT'S HER OUT IN THE CAR.
315
00:16:11,501 --> 00:16:15,344
YEAH. I DON'T LIKE TO BRAG,
BUT I'M HITTIN' THAT.
316
00:16:15,345 --> 00:16:17,546
NICE JOB.
YEAH.
317
00:16:17,547 --> 00:16:19,478
HEY, WHY DON'T YOU
BRING HER IN, SO, YOU KNOW,
318
00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:22,251
SHE CAN MEET THE FAMILY? SURE
THING, BUT WE CAN'T STAY LONG,
319
00:16:22,252 --> 00:16:24,253
BECAUSE SIENNA'S FRIENDS
ARE HAVING A PARTY,
320
00:16:24,254 --> 00:16:26,655
AND I'M THE ONLY ONE
OLD ENOUGH TO BUY THE BOOZE.
321
00:16:26,656 --> 00:16:29,058
OKAY. BRING HER IN,
BRING HER IN.
322
00:16:29,059 --> 00:16:32,661
GREAT IDEA. SO WHEN CINDY
SEES TIM'S NEW GIRLFRIEND,
323
00:16:32,662 --> 00:16:36,325
SHE'LL LOSE IT. NO, I JUST WANTED
TO GET A GOOD LOOK AT HER,
324
00:16:36,326 --> 00:16:39,128
BUT THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
325
00:16:39,129 --> 00:16:42,171
OH, THANKS FOR
THE SWELL ENGAGEMENT DINNER.
326
00:16:42,172 --> 00:16:45,504
WELL, LOOK WHO IT IS.
JIM DEVLIN. WHAT A SURPRISE.
327
00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:47,536
AND WHO IS THIS?
328
00:16:47,537 --> 00:16:50,279
SIENNA, YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND,
THE SWIMSUIT MODEL?
329
00:16:50,280 --> 00:16:53,212
WOW, TIM, WHEN YOU
SAID "SWIMSUIT MODEL,"
330
00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:55,584
I DIDN'T REALIZE
THAT YOU MEANT SOMEONE
331
00:16:55,585 --> 00:17:01,150
WHO WAS A LOT YOUNGER
AND MUCH HOTTER THAN CINDY.
332
00:17:01,151 --> 00:17:03,692
JIM, I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU WOULD DO THIS.
333
00:17:03,693 --> 00:17:09,258
GOLLY, OH! I AM SO SORRY
YOU GOT DRAGGED INTO THIS,
334
00:17:09,259 --> 00:17:12,101
TIM-ICHANGA CON QUESO.
335
00:17:12,102 --> 00:17:15,033
YOU SILLY BOOTS.
YOU NEED TO WAKE UP
336
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:18,507
AND SMELL
THE YUMMY, HOT CUP OF JAVA.
337
00:17:18,508 --> 00:17:22,141
YOU'RE NOT GONNA BREAK UP
ME AND W.K.R.P. IN CINDY-NATI.
338
00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:26,445
WE'RE LIKE SEAHORSES.
WHAT?
339
00:17:26,446 --> 00:17:28,547
THEY MATE FOR LIFE.
I SAW IT ON A CARTOON.
340
00:17:28,548 --> 00:17:30,619
THERE WERE TWO SEAHORSES
THAT GOT MARRIED, AND...
341
00:17:30,620 --> 00:17:32,381
HONEY, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH.
342
00:17:32,382 --> 00:17:35,224
YOU THOUGHT BRINGING TIM-PATHY
FOR THE DEVIL INTO THIS HOUSE
343
00:17:35,225 --> 00:17:37,586
WAS GONNA CHANGE THINGS?
344
00:17:37,587 --> 00:17:41,090
NO. I GOTTA SEND
YOU GUYS A TELEGRAM.
345
00:17:41,091 --> 00:17:43,362
CINDY LOVES ANDY. STOP.
346
00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:46,095
NOTHING'S EVER
GONNA BREAK US UP. STOP.
347
00:17:46,096 --> 00:17:48,367
OH, GOD. TAKE ME BACK,
TAKE ME BACK!
348
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:50,369
STOP!
349
00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:52,641
YOU KNOW YOU'RE STILL
MY MR. TIM-BOURINE MAN.
350
00:17:52,642 --> 00:17:56,375
AREN'T I STILL
YOUR BREAKFAST AT TIFF-CINDY'S?
351
00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:57,706
LISTEN TO ME.
352
00:17:57,707 --> 00:18:03,352
YOU ARE A WONDERFUL
AND KIND AND STRANGE WOMAN.
353
00:18:03,353 --> 00:18:06,455
BUT IF I'VE LEARNED ANYTHING
FROM MY THREE DAYS WITH SIENNA,
354
00:18:06,456 --> 00:18:08,687
IT'S THAT I LIKE
HAVING SEX WITH HER.
355
00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:12,421
SO YOU TAKE CARE, OKAY?
356
00:18:12,422 --> 00:18:14,823
HOLD IT RIGHT THERE,
MISTER.
357
00:18:14,824 --> 00:18:17,095
YOU KISS ME ONE MORE TIME,
358
00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,369
AND THEN TELL ME
YOU'RE READY TO WALK AWAY.
359
00:18:28,178 --> 00:18:30,880
OKAY, TAKE CARE.
360
00:18:33,583 --> 00:18:35,144
HONEY.
361
00:18:35,145 --> 00:18:38,147
OOH, CAN I DRIVE? CAN I DRIVE?
I NEED TO PRACTICE.
362
00:18:38,148 --> 00:18:39,148
BYE!
363
00:18:39,149 --> 00:18:41,891
I'M HITTIN' THAT.
364
00:18:44,894 --> 00:18:47,426
OKAY, SO WHERE WERE WE?
365
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:49,428
OH, WEDDING PLANS...
DEEJAY OR BAND?
366
00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:51,730
CHERYL, SAY SOMETHING TO HIM
AND RUIN HIS DAY,
367
00:18:51,731 --> 00:18:54,163
OR KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT
AND RUIN HIS LIFE.
368
00:18:54,164 --> 00:18:57,606
ANDY, IF WE HAVE A BOY, CAN
WE NAME HIM TIM JR.? OOH...
369
00:18:57,607 --> 00:19:01,139
IF YOU MARRY THIS WOMAN,
I AM GONNA CUT OFF YOUR HEAD
370
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:03,141
AND THROW IT IN A DITCH.
371
00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:05,214
BURN IT IN A DITCH,
BUT GO AHEAD.
372
00:19:05,215 --> 00:19:07,346
ANDY, SHE JUST
ASKED HER EX-HUSBAND
373
00:19:07,347 --> 00:19:09,848
TO TAKE HER BACK
RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!
374
00:19:09,849 --> 00:19:11,480
I THINK,
IN A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP,
375
00:19:11,481 --> 00:19:13,422
YOU NEED
TO PICK YOUR BATTLES.
376
00:19:13,423 --> 00:19:16,825
LOOK AT ME. YOU'RE NOT IN LOVE.
YOU'RE SICK.
377
00:19:16,826 --> 00:19:19,828
YOU'VE GOT DEVLIN-ITIS!
378
00:19:19,829 --> 00:19:22,861
WOW, SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE DOESN'T
WANT TO BE MATRON OF HONOR.
379
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:25,894
DANA, HOW ABOUT YOU?
CAN YOU BE THIN BY THURSDAY?
380
00:19:25,895 --> 00:19:28,267
CINDY, HONEY, I REALLY THINK
381
00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:32,271
MAYBE YOU NEED TO BE
ALONE FOR A LITTLE WHILE. HUH?
382
00:19:32,272 --> 00:19:34,673
HEY, IS THAT TIM
COMING BACK?
383
00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:36,945
OH, HOMER TIM-SON,
YOU CAME BACK!
384
00:19:36,946 --> 00:19:38,847
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
385
00:19:38,848 --> 00:19:41,680
I WAS TESTING YOU.
386
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:45,854
OH, I DIDN'T GET THAT!
OH, DO IT AGAIN.
387
00:19:45,855 --> 00:19:47,686
NO, NO, NO, NO.
388
00:19:47,687 --> 00:19:49,918
MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO.
389
00:19:49,919 --> 00:19:52,391
REALLY? ARE YOU SURE
YOU WOULDN'T RATHER...
390
00:19:52,392 --> 00:19:54,893
(imitates squeaking noise)
391
00:19:54,894 --> 00:19:57,896
I SUPPOSE I GOT TEN MINUTES.
392
00:19:57,897 --> 00:20:00,669
(all) ANDY!
393
00:20:00,670 --> 00:20:02,801
I MEAN, NO, NO.
394
00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:08,437
(sighs) GOOD-BYE, CINDY.
395
00:20:08,438 --> 00:20:10,979
SUDDENLY I'M... ALL ALONE.
396
00:20:10,980 --> 00:20:12,981
WILL I EVER FIND LOVE...
397
00:20:12,982 --> 00:20:15,544
OH, A PUPPY!
398
00:20:15,545 --> 00:20:18,988
I'M GONNA CUT OFF YOUR TAGS
AND TAKE YOU HOME!
399
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,392
YOU OKAY?
400
00:20:23,393 --> 00:20:28,397
YEAH, YEAH. I GUESS
I WAS IN OVER MY HEAD.
401
00:20:28,398 --> 00:20:30,799
IT'S JUST NICE
HAVING SOMEONE AROUND.
402
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:32,861
(Jim) SOMEONE AROUND?
403
00:20:32,862 --> 00:20:35,634
YOU MEAN AN ANNOYING LUNATIC
WHO'S TRYING TO STEAL YOUR SOUL?
404
00:20:35,635 --> 00:20:37,736
YOU DIDN'T
LET ME FINISH.
405
00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:41,970
I MEAN, HAVING SOMEONE
AROUND THIS GENERAL AREA.
406
00:20:41,971 --> 00:20:43,972
WE WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY,
407
00:20:43,973 --> 00:20:46,975
BUT YOU GOTTA FIND SOMEONE
WHO LETS YOU BE YOU.
408
00:20:46,976 --> 00:20:49,618
YEAH, THERE'S A SPECIAL GIRL
OUT THERE FOR YOU,
409
00:20:49,619 --> 00:20:51,620
PROBABLY IN RUSSIA,
SCRUBBING FLOORS.
410
00:20:51,621 --> 00:20:54,823
THANKS, GUYS.
YOU'RE THE BEST.
411
00:20:54,824 --> 00:20:57,726
AW... WELL, LET'S GO BACK TO
BEING THAT GUY THAT YOU WERE, HUH?
412
00:20:57,727 --> 00:21:00,529
FORGET THE DEVLINS.
YOU'RE DONE WITH THE DEVLINS.
413
00:21:00,530 --> 00:21:02,361
YOU'RE RIGHT.
414
00:21:02,362 --> 00:21:07,035
YEAH! ANDY-HAM LINCOLN
DOESN'T WEAR THESE ANYMORE.
415
00:21:07,036 --> 00:21:08,036
(gasps)
416
00:21:16,446 --> 00:21:21,850
I, UH... I'M NOT WEARING
MY SPEEDO, AM I?
417
00:21:21,851 --> 00:21:25,013
NO.
418
00:21:25,014 --> 00:21:28,016
NO, YOU'RE NOT.
419
00:21:28,017 --> 00:21:30,489
SHE DID DO A GOOD JOB
ON THAT WAXING.
420
00:21:30,490 --> 00:21:32,492
OH.
29512
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