All language subtitles for The.Only.Way.Is.Essex.S06E04.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-SLAG_track3_[eng]

- [Announcer] This programme
contains 3D boobs, a juicy rump,

and something very, very fishy.

The tans you see might be fake
but the people are all real,

although some of what they do

has been set up purely
for your entertainment.

Previously on The Only Way Is
Essex.

- I don't trust men, and
every boyfriend I've had,

I've never trusted them 100%

because then you're
letting your guard down.

- I can't have this.

I have enough shit in my life.

Chloe, so I'll give you
the heads up, that's fine.

- [Woman] Lauren, I'm
happy that you're happy!

- No, no, no, it's fine, it's
fine!

- Marge keeps textin' me,

stop putting make up on,
stop putting make up on.

- What is his problem?

- Your fight--
- You're doing it

exactly to her!
- She's fine, I bet--

- What you did to me!

- She said the best--
- You still--

- Stay out my life!
- You still--

- Don't follow me so closely.
- I'm not in your life!

- Come on, let's go.
- We'll end this nicely.

- Come on, let's go, we will.

[groovy jazz music]

♪ The only way is up, baby

♪ For you and me now

♪ Got there, let me break it off
♪

♪ Oughta push it

♪ What you got, let me take it
off ♪

♪ Shake, shake, like your
feathers girl ♪

- [groans] Broke the chain!
- You broke the chain!

- [Joey] It's come off again,
mate.

So shit!

- [Diggs] No it aint.

Go really slow.

Do you actually like that bike
then?

- What this Chopper?

- I thought you was
just being nice to Arg,

because I thought the fucking
the red one you rode in

on was 10 times better.

- The only thing about this
one is it breaks all the time,

it's not working now so
I can't even ride it.

- It's a pretty small Chopper to
be fair.

- It's 'cause it's for
eight-year-olds.

[all laughing]

- Listen, at the party the other
night,

why did you leave so early
with your girlfriend?

- Popey started saying
that she had said rumours

that she ain't got any
friends or something.

- Yeah but why?
- It's pathetic.

- Fuck knows, I don't know.

- Joe, you aint got any
friends mate, upset?

[Joe fake crying]

- Fuckin' hell man.
- I ain't got no friends.

- You've got no friends.
- I don't know man,

I don't know, you know
what girls are like.

I don't give give a fuck what
happened.

Look she cried and she
said, "Can I go home?"

So I was like "All right."

I didn't want to leave.

- So you took her home 'cause--

- Yeah, I took her home

'cause she was crying.
- And now you're taking

her out on a date.

Where you taking her?

- I'm gonna take her

to some really nice place called
cinema.

- Wait, so you took Lauren
Pope to the wine tasting,

got her loads of bottles
of wine, the whole day out,

brilliant date, fantastic,
by the barrels, snogged her,

and all that.

Now you're taking Lauren
Goodge to the cinema?

- Let's go to the cinema
and put some glasses on.

- I'll get you a large
popcorn and a large drink.

Oh, look at me, Coca-Cola.

- Nah, I aint gonna be watching
it anyway.

I'm just gonna be getting
on with her, ain't I?

- What, on the back seat?

- Look, there's nothing
wrong with the cinema!

Just shut it anyway, enough
about that.

I'm taking her the cinema, end
of.

- I wouldn't finger her in the
cinema.

- I'm not gonna finger her in
the cinema.

- I know what you're like.
- You're gonna try.

[all laughing]

[upbeat music]

♪ Let's fly away

♪ Drive away

♪ Get away

- Boo, your ratty little
blanket,

that you've had since you was
born.

Look at the state of it.

- No!

But you know why it's like this,

'cause my hamster ate
it when I was about six.

- It makes me feel sick.

- I love it.

Ah thanks.

I'm glad you remembered that.

- This is like the first holiday
you're going on without me.

- It's my dad's 50th.

I can't wait.

I've never been to Cad before.

It's gonna be so weird.

I can't believe you're not
coming with me.

I've got the essentials.

I've got eyelashes.

I've literally got 15 pairs.

- Are you gonna take fake tan,
or what?

- Of course I'm taking fake tan.

You know what I'm like.

I don't go that brown, I only go
red.

- Your ginger skin is gonna go
pink.

[both laughing]

- You're just being ornery to me

because you jel because you're
not coming.

- Yeah, I'm really jel, really
jealous.

- Well don't worry, I reckon I'm
gonna

miss Elvis more than I'll miss
you.

[light guitar music]

- Do you still hate me?

- I don't hate you, I'm
obviously just annoyed

at the fact you got involved in
something

that you didn't need to get
involved in.

Why did you have to talk to
Gemma?

- Because I saw her upset,

and I just wanted to help her.

- It just looks to me that
going and talking to Gemma

about Arg and telling Gemma
that,

"I know Arg, and I know
what you're going through."

That you still have feelings for
him.

- Like now, I completely
understand you may

be thinking that, but
it was not that at all,

like I really dislike him as a
person.

I've got no feelings to him
whatsoever,

and he literally, I don't even
recognise who he is anymore,

I just feel like he's a
complete and utter stranger.

- Yeah, but he still has
feelings for you, doesn't he?

- But I don't think he does.

- Do you know what I mean?

I don't want an ex-boyfriend,

I know you've been out
with him for four years,

and I totally respect that,

and I totally understand
that there's always

gonna be something there,

but being the new boyfriend

and still seeing someone
who's hurt you so much,

still hurt you, hurts me a
little bit.

Do you know what I mean?

I pretty a bit annoyed at
myself,

the fact that I wasn't there
to be able to help you.

- Yeah, but you didn't know
that he was gonna come over.

Neither did I.

I just feel really sad

that our first ever argument is
about Arg.

- And I hate arguing.

- I hate arguing.

Just don't ever talk about him
again.

And I love you and I
don't want to ever argue.

- Come here.

- [Lydia] I'm sorry.

- [Tom] You've got fake tan on.

[both laughing]

- Just a little bit.

- I still can't believe
she walked off crying.

Like, it was just completely
unnecessary.

- I've definitely got
more things to worry about

than Lauren denying

whether she said something
really silly or not.

And whether she's going out Tom
Pierce.

Like, who cares?

Seriously?

Go and get married or something.

God, there's so much ag
around at the minute.

- I know!

I've got enough ag to deal with.

- Is that from when you
was texting Prince Harry?

- Yeah.

- That is the maddest thing.

- Still now to this day, I have
no idea how the story broke.

I think he probably
thinks I sold the story,

which I didn't.

- Show your voice how you used
to talk.

- Well you just have to be like,

oh, hello, how are you?

[both laughing]

- You know, when you used to
see him did you wave like that?

- Always.

Hello.

- I wonder what he'd have
done if you'd gone like that.

That would've been so funny
'cause they don't like that.

- But I think he's more normal,
isn't he?

- Yeah, but you don't know.

You got to do the royal wave.

- [Lauren P] You don't
have to do the royal wave.

It's not like you get arrested

if you don't do the royal wave.

- Yeah, but you get disowned
by the Royal Family.

Kate has to change her ways.

- What?

- Imagine if you was an actual
princess.

- I know, I think that I
could really do that job well.

- I think you could as well,

but you'd have to be a lot
posher.

- No, I'd be like the people's
princess, like Cheryl Cole.

[both laughing]

[upbeat music]

♪ And I see forward

♪ And I pray for

- [Billie] You all right, Arg?

- [Arg] You all right, Bill?

- Hello.
- All right, Sam.

- How are you?
- Yeah, not too bad.

I just thought I'd come and pop
in

'cause I'm going to see
Mick across the road.

He wants me to come and
see him at the Sugarhut.

Maybe, I don't know.

- Maybe he wants you to do
like a club night there.

- Maybe, that'd be good
actually.

- [Sam] Good luck!

- Did you come on your chopper?

- No, actually.

- Unbelievable!

Usually you're like, a bit
tight with your presents.

- Me tight?

All the meals and stuff I bought
you two.

- All the meals, one pizza.

- But do you know what?

I'm still stressed out though.

- Why now, what you stressed out
about?

- Do you know it all
kicked off at the party?

- Oh yeah, we know.

You should've just got Gemma,
walked away and said to Lydia,

I'm not having this
conversation, we're happy.

- I know, I understand
where you're coming from,

but at the end of the
day I don't think I'm

in the wrong in this at all.

I was a bit upset because I
felt that Lydia was trying

to paint this picture

that I'm this nasty, horrible
boyfriend or whatever

and I felt that Gemma could--

- But you're not a nasty
person, everyone knows that.

- I know that and I felt
Gemma could have stuck up

for me a little bit,
that's why I was angry.

Lydia should--
- Why are you so angry?

Like, do you have feelings for
Lydia?

- No, I don't know,
obviously, well I don't know.

I grew up with Lydia, didn't I?

You know, I don't think I'll
ever sort

of fully get over her.

You know and I'm happy with
Gemma now.

And then obviously the way
Lydia acted it was like--

- What, do you think that Lydia

still has strong feelings for
you?

- Well, the way that she acted,

you think, well it's obvious,
ain't it?

- I think Lydia probably cares
about you,

but I think, I don't know.

- [Sam] Obviously, you
still make her blood boil.

- Yeah, well they do say
there's a very thin line

between love and hate, isn't
there?

- I can't believe how
long you're going for.

You're leaving me.

I wrote you a little plane
letter.

- Aw, a plane letter!

We haven't done these
since we were at school.

- I know, but do not open it
until you get on the plane.

- I used to always open--

- No, but today you're not
allowed.

- I promise.

I promise I won't open it.

Cara this is like the longest
I've been away without you.

It's gonna be so horrible!
- I'm gonna miss you.

Love you.
- I love you so much.

Please don't get any more best
friends.

- No more best friends.

- Bye Elvis.
- Make sure you Skype me.

- I will.

Bye Elvis.

- Say bye mommy.
- Love you.

Snuffy's bye.

- Bye babe.
- Love yous, bye.

[car engine rumbles]

Say bye mommy.

Bye babe.
- Bye!

- See you next week.

- And then with that he said
"Come on Gem, let's go."

So I've walked off with him,

and then he started
having a go at me saying,

"You know, you haven't stuck up
for me.

"Why have you not stuck up for
me?"

And I'm like--

- Well, it wasn't your argument.

She's really nice, Lydia.

She's noticed you haven't been
yourself.

- Yeah, she's like "You've
not been yourself."

She said, "But how you
are, is how I exactly was

"in the relationship with
James."

He just says to me like "You
know, you look so much better

"without makeup, don't wear
makeup."

You know--

- No, you've always worn makeup,
Gem.

- I used to wear makeup to
school.

- [Mom] You know, you've
always worn makeup.

- I love makeup.

- You don't go out the
door without makeup on.

That's depressing on its
own not wearing makeup.

You cannot let no one
control you full stop.

It's just not on, 'cause
they don't like you.

That means that they basically
don't like the way you are.

- [Gemma] The whole thing
is making my nerves bad.

- You know, are you over-tired?

Is it for the fact that you've
moved out?

That you're away from me and dad

for the first time in 31 years?

You know, 'cause it's
a big thing, isn't it?

And do you miss like
staying with me and dad.

'Cause sometimes when you're
young

you make a decision, don't you?

And think it's all gonna be
wonderful,

but it's not always the case.

Oh, don't cry, come on,
come on, what's the matter?

- It's just going wrong,
everything's just going wrong.

- What's going wrong?

You know, at the end of the day,

like James is like Jekyll
and Hyde, isn't he?

- I just think it's a shame.

It's just such a shame, because
the writing's on the wall.

It ain't really going nowhere,
is it?

- Well.

- It's not going nowhere, Mom.

Where's he, you know.

What's he doing for me?

I've bought him 400 pound shoes,

150 pound bottle of aftershave.

I'm exhausted, Mom.

What's he doing for me?

I've watched "The Office,"
like a moron, a thousand times,

'cause that's what he likes to
do.

What about what I like to do?

- If things are getting on your
nerves,

get rid of him Gem, move on.

- You know, this should be fun.

Where's the fun gone, James?

- What you gonna do then?

- He either makes a big
bold statement and woos me,

or [laughs] that's it.

See ya later James.

- Yeah.

[upbeat music]

- Think Bentley's got like--
- He's got a bit jealous.

- He feels a little bit left
out.

- Yeah, I've been trying to
make a fuss of him though.

I took him for a walk
the other day on his own.

- You can't walk her, that's the
problem.

- I wouldn't walk her

because she's the gayest dog in
the world.

[Lucy laughs]

- We're actually like a
little family, Mario, now.

Got our perfect son Bentley,

and then our little bitch
daughter.

She's just gotta stop
biting people, so naughty.

Let's try.

- [Mario] Go for it.

- Right, you gonna be a good
girl.

[dog whining]
- No, she's not.

- Oh, oh my god, calm down!

Good girl, there's a good girl.

All right, oh, come on, it
doesn't hurt, it's only a lead.

Right, we'll leave her to
get settled a little while.

- [Mario] Okay.

- You know, Jessica was
in my shop the other day.

She was trying to say to me
"Do you really trust him?"

I was like "Yeah."

I kind of feel like when
people ask me that question,

when I tell them I do trust you,

it's like I've given
them the wrong answer.

- And then Jess turn right
around to you

and that said she doesn't trust
Ricky?

- She said to me that
she's never trust a guy.

That she'll never ever trust a
guy 100%.

- Then who is she to say
anything to you?

Sorry, I'm not being funny.

This is ridiculous.

- Do you think she's alive?

- [Both] Lola?

- [Lucy] Yeah, she's just
sleeping.

- Lovely, I'm awake.
- Do you know what?

She's so lazy.

I'm not having a handbag dog.

You're not a handbag dog,
Lola, you are gonna be walked.

Right, come on Princess Lola.

No more sleepy time, let's get
up.

Let's go home.

I've got so much to do, come on
dog!

- Lola, come on.

Pick her up, we're in a rush.

- For god's sake, you're such a
diva.

You're a dog, you have legs,
you're supposed to use them.

- Come on.

- I hope she's not always like
this.

- This is my life.

- What's the most expensive
property

you've probably got here?

- [Estate Agent] The most
expensive?

It's 3.6 million.

- [Sam] Not that bracket

- But if it was like
something like two million

then we'd put like a five-

- Right, can I just say?

We're not going into the
two, 3.6 million bracket.

That's just out the question,
don't be,

that's just wasting the man's
time.

And then do you know what your
payments

would be on this a month?

Something ridiculous.

- Five grand?

- 10 grand a month.

- Really?!

- It's gonna be up in
that ball park, yeah.

- 10 grand a month?
- Exactly.

So why would you want to do
that?

- For 25 years!?

- It's ridiculous

- All right, well let's
just look at a budget

that we can probably afford
then.

- Exactly!

Oh my.

- Are you looking for four
bedrooms, did you say, is it?

- Yeah.
- I'd say four bedrooms.

I think because we want one
bedroom

to be like a dressing room.

- Sure, yeah.

- And obviously, yeah,
like kids and that as well.

- Kids?
- Not that we've got kids,

I'm just saying.

[all laughing]

- Don't talk about kids yet.

Get your house, enjoy your
lives.

- I'm thinking too much
ahead, ain't I , in time.

- Little bit.

[light music]

- Jess is the type of
person that couldn't cope

with any boy being unruly to
her.

He had to be 100% faithful, or
forget it,

we're just going on, I
know what she's like.

- Well what do you know then?
- No, I don't know anything.

I'm just saying, she's been so
happy

since the day she met Ricky.

But then all of a sudden,
just the last few days,

she's been a bit down.

- What makes you think it's
Ricky then?

- I mean he's a nice boy, Ricky,

but obviously this age gap,
I think could show out in it.

He reminds me of little
Mark when he was younger.

- Yeah, and they love
one another, don't they?

Because, I mean, they've turned
around

and said they love one another.

So I mean I can't see--

- Honestly, they've been
together two months, you know?

Maybe she's jumped in too quick.

She has been known to do
that before, hasn't she?

- It wouldn't be because he
macks about with all the girls,

macks about before all us lot,

and then he'll mack about with
the girl?

- This is a young man,

and some boys put on a plate
to them and they can't resist.

I'm not for one minute
saying Ricky's done that,

but if we were to go ask,

yeah, I would say something
obviously has happened.

I think he could be quite easily
led.

He's quite gullible.

- I don't know, yeah.

- He's a bit larger to be
honest with you, he's the same.

If he's done that now, well
then,

he's always gonna do it.

- No matter how much they say,

"I'm sorry, I won't do it
again,"

they always do it again, don't
they?

If he has hurt her, he'll get
one of them, and I mean it.

Because I've done it before now.

- Absolutely.

- You're right, you should
get lots of bedrooms,

but for all your clothes,
at the moment and the shoes.

- And the games room maybe,
obviously.

Do they come with the house,

or do you have to actually build
them in?

- Games room?

- Games room?

- Yeah, obviously.

- I've never seen you play
a game, any kind of game.

What, are you just wasting
Steve's time?

- I'm not wasting his time.

I'm asking a serious question
here.

- Do you mean like snooker
tables,

and them big ugly computer game
things?

- Pinball machines, slot
machines, maybe a beanbag room,

or something like that.

Just think fun so we can cotch.

The cotch room, we'll call it.

- [Sam] What do you mean a cotch
room?

- It's basically a room where

maybe me and the boys will hang
out,

'cause I ain't gonna
hang out in the garden.

Where will we sit?

- Well, that's what the lounge
is for.

Let's say I'm in the kitchen.

- The lounge is gonna be all
pink.

That's not homely, it's pink.

- We're not gonna have like
royal blue.

It's just not homely.

- Well, what colour do you want?

- Beige, brown.

- I like things like pastel
colours,

you know like pastel pink and--

- You can't do this to me,

you can't say we're
putting the house pink.

That's a step--
- Can I just say,

right, okay, right,

do you know my room now is like
a really

sort of pastelly paisley pink,
isn't it?

- No, it's pink.
- It's not.

- In Sam's defence, her house is
beautiful

the way she's decorated it,

and your flat is exactly the
same as when you moved in.

[all laughing]
- So true.

[upbeat music]

- It's a bit annoying
that I can't come out

with you boys today, really,

but I'm taking the lady
out for something to eat.

- How's it all going
with the Wright family?

Obviously being there all the
time.

- It's been good.
- Calling him Ricky Wright.

- Ricky Wright, Ricky Wrong.

- Carol did look good the
other day, didn't she?

We was all like, go on Carol.

- Smoking.
- Not scared, are you,

with those tight little pants?

[all laughing]

- I suppose it's like a
little family, I suppose,

with me, Jess, little dog,

we're taking him puppy
training classes together.

It's been a bit strange though.

- Tell me about it, mate.

- Since you saw Luce, it's
weird, mate.

It's like Jess, no,
Jess went in to Lucy's,

in being caring she's sort of
stepped the line a little bit,

and been a bit of a
busy bitch to be honest,

no disrespect to Jess.

- [Little Chris] Rick,
sort your woman out.

- She's sort of like questioned
Lucy's trust towards me,

like do you trust him?

Are you sure you trust him?

So it's agg'd me a little bit,

'cause I just think I've put
a 25 grand ring on her finger.

What more can I fucking do

without people just leaving me
alone?

- I don't think she was
doing it to be spiteful.

I don't think she was like sort

of giving her advice like that,

I think it was more, she's
like a motherly figure,

like she felt like she needed to
help her.

- I get that, the thing is I get
that,

but there's a different
thing where you go in,

and you're being like
make sure you trust him.

It's fine if you don't trust
him.

It sounds like you're trying to
say,

you shouldn't trust him, don't
trust him.

Do you know what I mean?

I just sort of feel--
- Yeah, I mean if Lucy--

- I think that's out of line.

- Rick, the question
is snog, marry, avoid?

Nanny Pat, Carol and Jess.

[all laughing]

[soft music]

- [Arg] All right, Mick?

- Hello, mate, all right.

Have a pew, you all right?

- [Arg] Yeah, not too bad.

- See you later.

Thanks for coming to see me.

- What can I do for you then,
Mick?

- I'm a little bit put
out to be honest with you.

- Go on.

- 'Cause obviously the
other day I was around you

when you was having a word with
Lyd,

and I don't know if you
realise what you're like

when you're talking to a girl
like that.

And I just felt it was
disrespectful

to her, to you, to Gemma, to
everyone that was around it

to reduce the girl to tears like
that.

- I just don't think it's right,
Mick,

for Lydia to go over to Gemma

dishing out advice, giving her
opinions.

- And that ain't even your
girlfriend,

that's the difference.

Do you know what I mean?

Your girlfriend was standing
next to ya,

and then your ex-girlfriend
you're tearing a strip off her.

- Lydia does bring out
that in me, unfortunately.

I don't wanna make her cry,

and I don't wanna make her
feel intimidated by me,

but at the same time what
I was saying I don't feel,

I can't go back on what I said
because what I said is true.

- It's not even about that.

I think it's about just the way

you went about talking to her.

If you was in my club,

and that was going on the
doormen

would've hoofed you out the
place, it wouldn't go on.

You couldn't, you was waving
your finger in her face,

and giving it to her like that.

- I don't remember going
like that to her face.

- Oh no, you was.
- You sure?

- Massively.

You was in her face,
giving her the finger,

right in her face,
mate, bang out of order.

It ain't good and it's not
good for you to be doing that,

and that's what upset me
to see that, it really did.

- All right, cheers Mick,
sorry about that, mate.

- It's all right, say that to
Lydia now.

- Okay, I understand, I
understand.

- [Mick] Good man.

[soft music]

- What's the matter with you?

You're really quiet.
- Am I?

- [Mom] Yeah, even daddy's
noticed it, and Nanny.

- I don't know, at the minute
for some reason with Ricky,

I'm like really happy on one
sense, like really happy,

and then there's something
there that's not right.

Every like so often I get
messages,

like tweets and stuff
saying that he's cheating,

and some of them were like quite
repeated

so I was thinking, like is this
true,

and I gave him the benefit of
the doubt,

and obviously he was like
of course it's not true.

I'm going in this like with my
full heart,

and he knows that.

And I just really hope
that he's true to his word.

- Well you're obviously thinking
that you can't trust him.

- I think it's where it's the
whole,

where the Lucy and Mario thing,

I'm not saying that Mario's
cheated,

but the subject of maybe
he has cheated or whatever,

it's just in my head.

- Yeah, just confront him, just
like see

if he'll tell the truth.

- I'm seeing him later
anyway so I'm gonna.

I might chat with him then,

'cause I've gotta get it off my
chest.

I can't keep holding it in

[light music]

- Hello.
- Sup, guys?

- Hi, Tom.

- What do you reckon?

So I've got this or the leather
jack?

- That jacket is sick.

- I know, that's why I've bought
it.

- You got to wear the jacket.
- You got to wear the jacket.

Tom P special.

- You know that, if you wear
that,

'cause you normally [speaks
quickly],

so if you wear that and you wear
that

over the top of that you'll be
sweet.

- Tom, last time we was...

Tom you should have some
Botox in your armpits

and then that won't happen no
more.

It's only a couple of
injections.

- It ain't that bad.

It's just really hot in here.

- [Chloe] How often is it a
problem?

- All right, let me try this
one.

- What are you doing?

- Trying on this one.

- Trust me, that outfit is
creepy sick.

[all laughing]

- I think this is definitely
better.

- I think this is
definitely a better look.

- Yeah man, a salty potato,
naughty.

- Is it like proper salt?

- You look stoss, stoss, stoss.

- All right.

- Stossy and zen.
- So are you nervous

taking her to the pictures?
- No, not at all.

Why would I be nervous man?

It's like, I'm only
going cinema, aren't I?

- So what are you gonna do after
that?

You ain't gonna take her
for a drink, be realistic,

you're gonna take her back to
the yard.

- No, I'm gonna take her for a
drink.

Popping champers, isn't it?

- Yeah, then afterwards the
yard.

[all laughing]

- All right, well I'll
take her to the cinema,

take her for a drink,

and then if she wants to
come back to the yard,

then I'll bang her.
[all laughing]

- Oh my god.

- She's gonna fucking kill me
if you tell her I said that.

- I'm not gonna say anything.
- Well, she hates me now,

so she definitely won't find out
off me.

- All right sweet, I'll
wear this, right guys.

- Good luck, Tom.

- Sick outfit, good luck, mate.

- See ya later.

- Be careful, be safe.

Do you reckon he'll get it on
her?

- Yeah.
- Me too, yeah.

Mm, tea.

[upbeat music]

- Bobby, you've got absolutely
beautiful feet here.

- I was dating a guy
once, and he wanted me

to wear various flip flops
while he touched himself.

And wanted to suck my toes,

and I couldn't even kiss him
after that

'cause I thought them lips

have probably sucked so many
toes.

- Can you mend a broken
heart with rubbing the feet?

- It can make you stronger
emotionally,

but it can't harden your heart,
Gemma,

if that's what you want.

With reflexology we can get
quite a clear indication

by your feet of what's
going on in your life.

- And what is going on?

- A little bit of congestion
going on

around the pelvic floor,

so I would suggest some
pelvic floor exercises.

- What?

- Flapping around like flip
flops.

- [Technician] No, I don't think
they are!

[all laughing]

We've got a little bit of water
retention

going on here as well.

Do you spend a lot of time on
your feet?

- I literally wake up in the
morning and I don't stop.

I think I've got something wrong
with me.

- That or you're pregnant.

- Told you that.

[soft music]

- Hey.
- Hello, babe, you look nice.

- Thank you.
- You look ready

for a night out.
- I do, don't I?

I'm a bit too over dressed.

- High heels, honestly it's
what I expected from you anyway.

- Well it's how I normally dress
anyway.

- We got three choices, all
right?

Ice Age, Katy Perry, or
Spider-Man, what do you reckon?

- I've seen Katy Perry.

I've seen Spider-Man, so Ice
Age.

What?

- All right, no, it's fine.

I wanted Spider-Man a little
bit, but it's all right.

- Oh, do you?

- No I'm only joking.

They're all 3D though you know
that, yeah?

- We got to wear them glasses?

- Yeah, it's 3D.

- Do you think you'll
pull them off better?

- Of course I'm gonna be
able to pull off better.

Are you gonna be able to pull
them off?

- Of course! [laughs]

- Let's get to it then, yeah.

All right, what do you want,
popcorn?

- Yeah.
- All right.

[light music]

- The keys come on Friday, to
the flat.

- [Jess] You excited?

- Really excited.

- I bet.

- It's big.

I think you'll like it.

You're gonna have to
be going out shopping,

getting furniture, TVs.

You'll have your little section.

You can't have a wardrobe

because I haven't got no
wardrobes for me.

You can definitely have a
drawer.

It's exciting times.

- It's really good.

Thank you!

- Look at that, lovely.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You'll be allowed to stay
in my room, won't you?

What about a little
watchful eye, Don Corleone?

[chuckles]

[Jess clears throat]

What's up?

- [Jess] I don't know.

[upbeat music]

- Time to work your magic, boys.

- Do I look good?

- I think you should
wear them all the time.

- I know.

What you doing?

My god, that's actually stuck to
my dress.

Not there.

- Shut up.

- Stop looking at my boobs,
please.

- They look 3D in these glasses.

- There's popcorn in my bum.

- I'm not getting it out for
you.

- Don't try and touch my boobs.

- Give us a little kiss.

- When you talk about all this
stuff

and the flat and the future,

and all that stuff that
you always talk about.

I just don't know anymore.

- What do you mean?

I don't mean what?

- I don't know if you're
ready for what you say,

like I feel like you've
been really full on,

and I'm so scared that you're
21, I'm 26.

- We've both been full on.

- Yeah, I've been full on, but.

- Well then the age
shouldn't even come into it.

There's one thing I know and
it's I know that I want you,

and I love you, and these
last couple of weeks,

like I, you know what I'm
like, I don't let emotions out,

and I keep things in and I
bottle them up.

But the feelings for you, for
me,

have just been growing and
growing and,

I don't know, I just know
that I want to be with you,

and I can see a future with you.

I love you so much, like
you don't understand,

like but when I sit at home,

and I just think about
you I get emotional.

Look, I want you to be with me,

watching little Blake
grow up and be a big dog.

- I just don't know, like the
trust thing

is just on my head all the time,

and I don't know why I can't
shake it off.

I can't trust you.

- Well what do you want me to do
then?

- I don't know.

I just don't want to go down the
line

if I think you're potentially
could cheat on me.

Messages on Twitter
and stuff and all that.

- You don't understand
what I had to deal with

when everything was with you.

I used to get messages all the
time

about you and other fellas, I
still do,

but I just, I trust you.

- I don't think you know
what you're getting into.

- Well listen, I don't
do what I've just done.

I don't put my heart on the
table, and I've done it.

And whether you choose
to take it, accept it,

but if you wanna give me the
chance,

if you wanna do it and
see what can happen,

if you love me as much as you
say,

and I love you as much as I say

then I don't see any reason
why we can't come together

and just crack on, 'cause I
think there's something there.

- And you've not cheated on me?

- I can't say anything.

I've got nothing left.

- I think I just need to go away

and think about everything
you've said

and just see what happens.

I wanna believe you and I think
I do.

I've just got so much going on
in my head.

I don't know what to think.

- Right, see ya later then.

[clears throat]

[downcast music]

- That was real good.

- You like it?
- Yeah.

- I would much rather
watch Spider-Man, babe.

- Really?

- No, this was fun, this was
good.

- Did my hair mess up from my
glasses?

- Yeah, it looks shit.

[laughs] No it looks fine.

- You wouldn't stop kissing
me, touching me, talking.

- Excuse me, you kept trying to
feel me.

- Excuse me?

Oh yeah, come on.

What we doing now?

- I think for a drink, yeah?

- Come on then.

[gravel crunching]

[easygoing music]

- James, oh my god.

- [James] No wait, just go back
Gemma.

- It's James, and I got pink
fishies.

- [Arg] Gemma?

- [Gemma] Yeah?

- Gemma, I just want you to know
that,

I wouldn't have done this for
anyone else.

I really wouldn't.

- Do you love me 100%?

- I love you 100%, I
think I've proved it now.

I know obviously I'm allergic to
cats,

and I don't really like dogs,

so I wanted to buy you a pet

and I've got you some kissing
fish.

I know you love pink,

so I thought I'd give you
like a pink fish tank.

I just want you to know that I'm
so proud

that you're my girlfriend.

But listen, Gem, you're not
really pregnant, are ya?

- Well I don't know yet.

- What?
- I don't know yet.

- All right, but you don't
reckon though.

- I don't know.

- [laughs] All right, well
listen,

before I shrivel up any more,

I think I need to come inside.

- No, you can give me the
fish and then you can go.

- What, why?
- I'm joking, you stupid sod.

- Shall I just walk in?

- Yeah.

Oh, don't kill them, James.

They're like our little babies.

What do we call them?

[door slamming]
- Maybe Posh and Becks.

[trumpets blaring]

- [Announcer] Next time on
"The Only Way Is Essex."

- I think I've got
something wrong with me.

- That or you're pregnant.

- [Announcer] Is Gemma having
a baby or is it hot air?

- What?

- [Announcer] Will Lola
ever learn to walk?

- No come on, pick her up.

Jeez, we're in a rush.

- [Lucy] Oh for god sake, such a
diva!

- [Announcer] And will Arg's
hammy performance do the trick?

♪ Oh I'm stuck being in love

- James, oh my god.

- [Announcer] Ooh, that reminds
me,

I must pick up that leg of pork!

Who knows?

These people are real,

and anything can happen on
"The Only Way Is Essex."

♪ Hold on, oh

♪ The only way is up, baby

♪ For you and me now

♪ The only way is up, baby

♪ For you and me now

♪ The only way is up, baby

♪ For you and me now