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1
00:00:03,034 --> 00:00:05,776
(both laughing)
2
00:00:16,687 --> 00:00:19,249
ANDY, WHAT THE...
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!
3
00:00:19,250 --> 00:00:21,191
WHAT?
4
00:00:21,192 --> 00:00:23,153
YOU JUST SPIT ON MY FLOOR!
5
00:00:23,154 --> 00:00:24,624
OH.
6
00:00:24,625 --> 00:00:28,798
JEEZ, I'M SORRY.
I THOUGHT I WAS AT HOME.
7
00:00:28,799 --> 00:00:32,031
YOU MEAN, YOU SPIT
ON THE FLOOR AT HOME?
8
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,204
SURE, EVERYBODY DOES...
9
00:00:34,205 --> 00:00:36,536
YOU KNOW,
WHEN THEY'RE ALL ALONE.
10
00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:40,510
NOBODY SPITS ON THE FLOOR!
GET OUTTA HERE!
11
00:00:40,511 --> 00:00:43,313
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
GET OUTTA MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW!
12
00:00:43,314 --> 00:00:48,349
OH, EXCUSE ME. I DIDN'T REALIZE
I WAS AT THE RITZ.
13
00:00:58,729 --> 00:01:01,761
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?
14
00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:03,393
OH, I'M SORRY, HONEY.
15
00:01:03,394 --> 00:01:05,396
I-I THOUGHT
I WAS AT ANDY'S HOUSE.
16
00:01:07,398 --> 00:01:10,401
♪♪♪
17
00:01:16,247 --> 00:01:18,248
MMM, MMM, MMM.
THIS LOOKS GOOD.
18
00:01:18,249 --> 00:01:23,553
OH, YOU KIDS ARE DOING SUCH
A GREAT JOB ON THAT TREE. OH.
19
00:01:23,554 --> 00:01:26,085
GRANDMA IS GONNA LOVE IT.
20
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:29,219
REALLY? WHEN DID MOM START
LIKIN' THINGS THAT SUCK?
21
00:01:29,220 --> 00:01:31,090
(laughs)
OH.
22
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:33,723
CAN WE PUT MY SPONGEBOB TOY
ON TOP?
23
00:01:33,724 --> 00:01:36,095
LOOK, I CAN'T PUT MY MIKE DITKA
BUBBLEHEAD UP THERE,
24
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:38,268
YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR
SPONGEBOB UP. (Cheryl) NO.
25
00:01:38,269 --> 00:01:42,101
NO, HONEY,
YOU KNOW THAT
26
00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:45,135
GRANDMA'S SPECIAL ANGEL
ALWAYS GOES ON TOP.
27
00:01:45,136 --> 00:01:47,877
GRANDMA GAVE THIS TO ME
AND DADDY ON OUR WEDDING DAY.
28
00:01:47,878 --> 00:01:49,579
YEAH.
29
00:01:49,580 --> 00:01:52,442
AND I GOT A 2-HOUR LECTURE
ABOUT PUTTING MY HUSBAND FIRST.
30
00:01:52,443 --> 00:01:55,745
YES, WISE WORDS
FROM A WISE WOMAN, CHERYL.
31
00:01:55,746 --> 00:01:58,148
UH-HUH. I'M ABOUT TO GET
FOUR DAYS OF MOM'S WISDOM
32
00:01:58,149 --> 00:02:00,650
ABOUT EVERY SINGLE THING I DO.
33
00:02:00,651 --> 00:02:03,393
IS THAT WHY YOU DOUBLED UP
THE BOOZE IN THE EGGNOG?
34
00:02:03,394 --> 00:02:04,654
YEAH...
35
00:02:04,655 --> 00:02:07,397
AND WHEN MOM GETS HERE,
I BUMP IT UP TO TRIPLE.
36
00:02:07,398 --> 00:02:08,398
(Jim) AH.
37
00:02:08,399 --> 00:02:10,460
AH, WHY WAIT?
(gasps)
38
00:02:10,461 --> 00:02:12,862
(laughs)
39
00:02:12,863 --> 00:02:14,504
WHEN'S GRANDMA
GONNA BE HERE?
40
00:02:14,505 --> 00:02:15,905
OH, HONEY, SHE'LL BE HERE
ANY MINUTE.
41
00:02:15,906 --> 00:02:19,138
UNCLE RYAN AND AUNT DANA WENT
TO PICK HER UP AT THE AIRPORT.
42
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,640
DON'T YOU USUALLY PICK HER UP
EVERY YEAR?
43
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:22,642
YEAH, FOR THE LAST 15 YEARS,
BUT RYAN CALLED TODAY
44
00:02:22,643 --> 00:02:25,475
AND SAID HE WANTED TO DO IT.
I'M GONNA MISS MY ANNUAL TRIP
45
00:02:25,476 --> 00:02:28,178
TO THE NUDIE BAR,
BUT IT'S OKAY.
46
00:02:28,179 --> 00:02:30,421
YEAH, MOM WAS STARTIN'
TO COMPLAIN ABOUT THAT, ANYWAY.
47
00:02:32,223 --> 00:02:35,825
SO RYAN VOLUNTEERED, HUH?
INTERESTING.
48
00:02:35,826 --> 00:02:37,627
NO, NOT REALLY.
49
00:02:37,628 --> 00:02:40,490
(laughing)
OH, SWEET, YOUNG JAMES...
50
00:02:40,491 --> 00:02:43,633
LIKE AN INNOCENT DOE,
DAMP WITH THE MORNING DEW.
51
00:02:43,634 --> 00:02:44,834
WHAT?
52
00:02:44,835 --> 00:02:47,837
DON'T YOU GET IT, MAN?
HE'S AFTER YOUR TITLE.
53
00:02:47,838 --> 00:02:49,569
HE WANTS TO BE
THE NUMBER ONE SON.
54
00:02:49,570 --> 00:02:53,273
OH, COME ON.
RYAN'S THE NEW GUY, THAT'S ALL.
55
00:02:53,274 --> 00:02:55,705
HE'S SUPPOSED TO SUCK UP
TO HIS MOTHER-IN-LAW...
56
00:02:55,706 --> 00:02:57,707
AND I DON'T BLAME HIM.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
57
00:02:57,708 --> 00:02:59,709
MAGGIE IS THE GREATEST.
58
00:02:59,710 --> 00:03:01,951
HEY, THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT
WHEN I WAS NUMBER ONE,
59
00:03:01,952 --> 00:03:03,953
BUT THEN YOU CAME ALONG,
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN,
60
00:03:03,954 --> 00:03:06,687
ANDY ISN'T A BABY FACE.
HE'S GOT A WEIGHT PROBLEM.
61
00:03:08,919 --> 00:03:10,920
LOOK IT,
RYAN CAN'T TOUCH ME, ANYWAY.
62
00:03:10,921 --> 00:03:13,863
I'M THE KING,
AND THIS IS MY THRONE.
63
00:03:13,864 --> 00:03:16,896
I THOUGHT THE UPSTAIRS TOILET
WAS YOUR THRONE.
64
00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:18,969
I'M THE KING.
I CAN HAVE TWO THRONES.
65
00:03:19,830 --> 00:03:21,871
(laughing)
66
00:03:21,872 --> 00:03:25,435
RYAN, THAT IS THE FUNNIEST STORY
ABOUT MENOPAUSE I'VE EVER HEARD.
67
00:03:25,436 --> 00:03:27,377
WELL.
68
00:03:27,378 --> 00:03:29,909
THEY'RE HERE!
GRANDMA!
69
00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:32,482
HELLO, MY DARLINGS.
HI, GRANDMA!
70
00:03:32,483 --> 00:03:34,384
OH, HELLO, HELLO.
HOW ARE YOU, MAGGIE?
71
00:03:34,385 --> 00:03:35,645
OH, FINE, HONEY.
(Cheryl) HEY, MOM.
72
00:03:35,646 --> 00:03:36,886
HOW WAS YOUR FLIGHT?
73
00:03:36,887 --> 00:03:37,917
OH, WONDERFUL.
RYAN SURPRISED ME
74
00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:39,919
WITH A FIRST CLASS UPGRADE.
YEAH.
75
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:42,492
WE WERE GONNA USE THE MILES
FOR EUROPE, BUT IT'S MOM.
76
00:03:42,493 --> 00:03:43,494
(laughs)
77
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,226
THAT'S RIGHT,
AND NO MOTHER-IN-LAW OF MINE
78
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,859
IS GONNA PAY FOR HEADPHONES.
I MEAN, COME ON.
79
00:03:49,860 --> 00:03:50,860
(both laugh)
80
00:03:50,861 --> 00:03:54,934
WHAT'S THAT SOUND, JIM?
FOOTSTEPS.
81
00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:56,936
HEY, JIM, HONEY,
WHY DON'T YOU GRAB MOM'S BAGS
82
00:03:56,937 --> 00:04:00,340
AND PUT 'EM UP IN KYLE'S
ROOM? YEAH, YEAH, GOOD IDEA.
83
00:04:00,341 --> 00:04:02,942
WAIT A MINUTE, KYLE'S ROOM?
YEAH, THE KIDS ALL BUNK
84
00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:05,715
IN THE GIRLS' ROOM.
THEY LOVE IT. IT'S LIKE CAMPING.
85
00:04:05,716 --> 00:04:07,977
I GET TO SLEEP
IN THE CLOSET.
86
00:04:07,978 --> 00:04:08,978
OH.
87
00:04:08,979 --> 00:04:10,450
HOLD ON
ONE SECOND THERE, JIM.
88
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:11,921
I MEAN, THIS IS SILLY.
WE HAVE AN EXTRA BEDROOM.
89
00:04:11,922 --> 00:04:15,325
YEAH, WITH A BED
THAT'S NOT A RACECAR.
90
00:04:15,326 --> 00:04:16,956
I-I WOULDN'T BE IMPOSING?
91
00:04:16,957 --> 00:04:20,290
OH, NOT AT ALL. YOU SHOULD
DEFINITELY STAY WITH US. UNH-UNH, YEAH.
92
00:04:20,291 --> 00:04:22,393
WELL, I'LL DRINK TO THAT.
93
00:04:24,335 --> 00:04:27,967
I MEAN, IF... IF THAT WORKS
FOR YOU, MOM.
94
00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:29,999
WELL, MAGGIE,
YOU ALWAYS STAY WITH US.
95
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:32,472
HMM. SEEMS
SOMETHING'S CHANGED.
96
00:04:32,473 --> 00:04:34,444
(Ryan) OKAY, JIM, I'LL JUST
97
00:04:34,445 --> 00:04:36,446
PUT THESE BAGS BACK IN
THE CAR. I GOT IT. I GOT IT.
98
00:04:36,447 --> 00:04:37,877
I DON'T MIND.
I GOT IT!
99
00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:39,849
OH!
100
00:04:39,850 --> 00:04:42,612
CAUGHT A PIECE OF THE
OLD YULE LOG. (Maggie gasps)
101
00:04:42,613 --> 00:04:45,615
(Jim) SORRY, ANDY.
ANDREW! SUCH A MOUTH.
102
00:04:45,616 --> 00:04:47,617
MAGGIE, MAGGIE,
Y-YOU SURE YOU WANNA GO?
103
00:04:47,618 --> 00:04:49,359
I MEAN, AREN'T YOU GONNA
MISS THE KIDS?
104
00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:51,361
OH, HONEY,
I CAN JUST TUCK 'EM IN
105
00:04:51,362 --> 00:04:52,992
AND BE BACK HERE FIRST THING
EACH MORNING.
106
00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:55,865
NOW WHO KNOWS WHERE I CAN GET
A CHRISTMAS COOKIE?
107
00:04:55,866 --> 00:04:57,867
(children) WE DO,
WE DO! YAY! (laughs)
108
00:04:57,868 --> 00:04:59,629
KYLE REALLY SLEEPS
IN THE CLOSET?
109
00:04:59,630 --> 00:05:03,373
YEAH, IN AN OLD
SUITCASE. HE LOVES IT. HUH.
110
00:05:03,374 --> 00:05:06,876
HOW'S THAT VIEW
FROM YOUR THRONE, KING JAMES?
111
00:05:06,877 --> 00:05:08,878
YOU WERE RIGHT.
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
112
00:05:08,879 --> 00:05:10,079
I SHOULD HAVE
113
00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:12,081
NEVER LET HIM GO TO THE AIRPORT
AND PICK HER UP.
114
00:05:12,082 --> 00:05:14,043
NOW HE'S TRYING
TO STEAL HER AWAY,
115
00:05:14,044 --> 00:05:16,045
AND I DON'T GET
TO GO TO THE NUDIE BAR.
116
00:05:16,046 --> 00:05:18,348
WE CAN GO RIGHT NOW
IF YOU WANT.
117
00:05:18,349 --> 00:05:20,851
NAH, IT'S NOT THE SAME
WITHOUT YOUR MOM.
118
00:05:27,958 --> 00:05:29,929
JIM, YOU'RE BEING
RIDICULOUS.
119
00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:32,862
RYAN IS NOT AFTER YOUR TITLE.
YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A TITLE.
120
00:05:32,863 --> 00:05:36,466
WATCH IT, CHERYL. WATCH IT.
IF I DON'T HAVE A TITLE,
121
00:05:36,467 --> 00:05:38,468
THAT MEANS
YOU DON'T HAVE A TITLE.
122
00:05:38,469 --> 00:05:41,441
I DON'T HAVE A TITLE.
123
00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:45,014
WELL, AS KING OF THIS FAMILY,
I CAN GIVE YOU A TITLE.
124
00:05:45,015 --> 00:05:50,780
I DUB THEE QUEEN CHERYL...
FIRST BABE OF THE REALM
125
00:05:50,781 --> 00:05:52,882
AND THE CARETAKER
OF THE FAMILY JEWELS.
126
00:05:52,883 --> 00:05:56,426
OH, JIM.
127
00:05:56,427 --> 00:05:58,428
YOU NOW HAVE A TITLE.
128
00:05:58,429 --> 00:06:01,431
THANK YOU. I'M
THRILLED WITH IT. (laughs)
129
00:06:01,432 --> 00:06:03,433
LOOK, HONEY,
I, FOR ONE, AM THRILLED
130
00:06:03,434 --> 00:06:05,435
SHE'S NOT HERE
TO NITPICK ME.
131
00:06:05,436 --> 00:06:07,437
BESIDES, THERE IS MORE
THAN ENOUGH OF MY MOTHER
132
00:06:07,438 --> 00:06:08,898
FOR YOU AND RYAN TO SHARE.
133
00:06:08,899 --> 00:06:10,900
SHARE?
YES.
134
00:06:10,901 --> 00:06:12,902
HE DOESN'T WANNA SHARE.
"OH, OH, LOOK AT ME.
135
00:06:12,903 --> 00:06:14,904
"I CAN GET YOU
A FIRST CLASS UPGRADE.
136
00:06:14,905 --> 00:06:16,906
"OH, WE GOT BEDROOMS
AT OUR HOUSE.
137
00:06:16,907 --> 00:06:20,049
"OH, WE PAY FOR HEAT
AT OUR HOUSE."
138
00:06:20,050 --> 00:06:22,051
CHERYL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
WHEN WE TAKE MAGGIE OUT
139
00:06:22,052 --> 00:06:24,484
FOR STEVIE B's RIBS AND CHICKEN,
140
00:06:24,485 --> 00:06:26,486
I'VE GOT TO SHINE!
141
00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:30,720
WELL, YOU MIGHT WANNA START
BY ZIPPIN' UP YOUR FLY.
142
00:06:30,721 --> 00:06:33,062
JIM, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
143
00:06:33,063 --> 00:06:34,564
THIS IS NOT THE TIME
144
00:06:34,565 --> 00:06:35,865
TO BE PETTY
AND COMPETITIVE.
145
00:06:35,866 --> 00:06:38,528
WELL, THEN, HOW COME DONNER
TRIED TO SCREW NIXON
146
00:06:38,529 --> 00:06:40,530
OUT OF HIS SPOT
IN THE REINDEER GAMES?
147
00:06:40,531 --> 00:06:42,131
WHAT?
THE REINDEER GAMES.
148
00:06:42,132 --> 00:06:44,133
THEY WERE COMPETING
FOR THE SAME SPOT.
149
00:06:44,134 --> 00:06:46,806
WELL, IF IT ISN'T
FRED AND ETHEL.
150
00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:48,808
SOON AS THE STARS
OF THE SHOW GET HERE,
151
00:06:48,809 --> 00:06:51,040
WE CAN GO TO DINNER.
OH, AH.
152
00:06:51,041 --> 00:06:52,141
WOULD YOU STOP
STIRRING HIM UP,
153
00:06:52,142 --> 00:06:54,143
AND WHY ARE YOU
INCLUDING ME?
154
00:06:54,144 --> 00:06:56,145
COME ON, SIS,
WAKE UP.
155
00:06:56,146 --> 00:06:58,147
YOU THINK THAT PRETTY BOY RYAN
CAME UP WITH THIS?
156
00:06:58,148 --> 00:07:00,750
THIS HAS THE STINK OF DANA
ALL OVER IT.
157
00:07:00,751 --> 00:07:05,424
(gasps) DANA... OF COURSE
SHE WANTS A PIECE OF THIS.
158
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:08,958
THEY'RE TRYING TO TAKE YOUR ROLE
AS PREMIER COUPLE OF THE FAMILY.
159
00:07:08,959 --> 00:07:11,931
OKAY, PREMIER COUPLE?
WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?
160
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:14,033
IT MEANS WE'RE NUMBER ONE.
161
00:07:14,034 --> 00:07:16,035
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
162
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:18,968
IT MEANS THEY'RE CANADA,
AND WE'RE AMERICA.
163
00:07:18,969 --> 00:07:20,770
OH.
164
00:07:20,771 --> 00:07:22,772
HEY.
(Cheryl) HEY.
165
00:07:22,773 --> 00:07:25,945
HEY. H-HEY. W-WHY ARE
YOU GUYS ALL DRESSED UP?
166
00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:28,177
YEAH, TALK ABOUT
DONNING GAY APPAREL.
167
00:07:28,178 --> 00:07:31,050
(laughs)
WELL, MOM FOUND OUT
168
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:33,052
RYAN'S A MEMBER
AT OAKCREST COUNTRY CLUB.
169
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,925
AND I'VE ALWAYS WANTED
TO GO TO THEIR HOLIDAY PARTY.
170
00:07:35,926 --> 00:07:37,056
YEAH, SO RYAN CALLED,
171
00:07:37,057 --> 00:07:39,058
AND HE WAS ABLE TO GET
RESERVATIONS FOR ALL OF US.
172
00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:41,531
OH.
173
00:07:41,532 --> 00:07:46,736
WELL, FUNNY YOU DIDN'T CALL
TO CHECK WITH US.
174
00:07:46,737 --> 00:07:48,738
WELL, IF YOU GUYS
WANNA TO GO STEVIE B's,
175
00:07:48,739 --> 00:07:49,899
WE'LL JUST TAKE MAGGIE TO
THE CLUB OURSELVES. YEAH.
176
00:07:49,900 --> 00:07:54,243
♪ OH, CANADA ♪
177
00:07:54,244 --> 00:07:58,849
♪ IT'S SOMETHING
SOMETHING LAND ♪
178
00:08:00,951 --> 00:08:02,912
WE CAN BE DRESSED
IN TWO MINUTES. GREAT.
179
00:08:02,913 --> 00:08:04,554
OH, GREAT.
ANDY,
180
00:08:04,555 --> 00:08:06,586
LET'S GO OVER TO YOUR HOUSE
AND PICK YOU OUT A NICE SUIT.
181
00:08:06,587 --> 00:08:08,788
OH, MOM, I-I CAN PICK OUT
MY OWN SUIT.
182
00:08:08,789 --> 00:08:10,920
OH, WHAT ARE YOU HIDING?
183
00:08:10,921 --> 00:08:13,663
NO! MOM, WAIT!
MA, DON'T LOOK UNDER THE BED!
184
00:08:13,664 --> 00:08:16,065
THOSE TAPES
CAME WITH THE HOUSE!
185
00:08:16,066 --> 00:08:19,268
OH, HELL TO THE NO!
186
00:08:19,269 --> 00:08:20,670
WHAT?
187
00:08:20,671 --> 00:08:22,672
WE KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE TRYING TO DO.
188
00:08:22,673 --> 00:08:25,134
YEAH, DON'T DENY IT.
YOU'RE AFTER MOM.
189
00:08:25,135 --> 00:08:27,136
(both laugh)
190
00:08:27,137 --> 00:08:30,640
WE'RE NOT AFTER HER.
WE'VE GOT HER.
191
00:08:30,641 --> 00:08:32,511
(gasps)
192
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,513
AND SHE'S
NOT COMIN' BACK.
193
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,186
YOU BEEN THE BIG DOG AROUND HERE
FOR WAY TOO LONG.
194
00:08:37,187 --> 00:08:38,517
MM-HMM.
195
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:42,593
HEY, WATCH IT, PAL.
THAT BIG DOG IS MY WIFE.
196
00:08:45,155 --> 00:08:47,526
OKAY, ARE...
ARE YOU SERIOUSLY
197
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,229
TRYING TO COMPETE WITH US
FOR MOM'S ATTENTION?
198
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:51,931
YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT, WE ARE.
199
00:08:51,932 --> 00:08:53,603
I'VE BEEN NUMBER TWO
MY WHOLE LIFE.
200
00:08:53,604 --> 00:08:55,164
NOW GET IN THE BACKSEAT
WITH ANDY.
201
00:08:55,165 --> 00:08:58,908
I DON'T THINK YOU KIDS KNOW WHO
YOU'RE MESSIN' WITH HERE. UH-HUH.
202
00:08:58,909 --> 00:09:01,210
EXCUSE ME, JIM,
BUT ARE YOU GETTIN'
203
00:09:01,211 --> 00:09:03,212
ALL UP IN OUR KOOL-AID?
204
00:09:03,213 --> 00:09:07,677
OH, YEAH!
205
00:09:07,678 --> 00:09:10,620
YOU TWO BETTER BE READY
TO BRING IT.
206
00:09:10,621 --> 00:09:12,622
OH, IT'LL BE BROUGHT.
RIGHT, RYAN?
207
00:09:12,623 --> 00:09:14,153
OH, YEAH,
WITH A HEAVY HAND.
208
00:09:14,154 --> 00:09:17,026
BAM!
209
00:09:17,027 --> 00:09:19,889
YOU TWO
DON'T STAND A CHANCE.
210
00:09:19,890 --> 00:09:20,960
WE'RE YOUNGER, SEXIER,
211
00:09:20,961 --> 00:09:22,992
AND WE DRIVE A COOLER CAR.
ONE MORE TIME, HONEY.
212
00:09:22,993 --> 00:09:25,235
BAM! BAM!
213
00:09:27,197 --> 00:09:29,198
YOU WATCH IT.
214
00:09:29,199 --> 00:09:33,944
YOU HAVE AROUSED
THE WRATH OF THE KING!
215
00:09:44,014 --> 00:09:46,886
OH, HONEY, I DON'T KNOW.
216
00:09:46,887 --> 00:09:48,888
ARE YOU SURE
THIS ISN'T TOO MUCH?
217
00:09:48,889 --> 00:09:52,021
HONEY, THIS IS WAR, AND IN WAR,
YOU BRING OUT THE BIG GUNS.
218
00:09:52,022 --> 00:09:54,323
OH, GOOD!
AH!
219
00:09:54,324 --> 00:09:57,366
(laughter)
220
00:09:57,367 --> 00:10:01,030
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
THE SHOW IS ABOUT TO BEGIN.
221
00:10:01,031 --> 00:10:04,904
OH, A SHOW? I DIDN'T KNOW
THERE WAS A SHOW.
222
00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:06,706
WOW.
223
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,908
REALLY? THEN WHO MOVED
THE COUCH?
224
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:10,209
PERHAPS 'TWAS...
225
00:10:10,210 --> 00:10:12,141
(foreign accent) A
CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. AH.
226
00:10:12,142 --> 00:10:15,885
SHH. IT'S STARTING.
COME ON.
227
00:10:15,886 --> 00:10:18,848
WE NOW PRESENT
"A CHRISTMAS WITHOUT GRANDMA."
228
00:10:18,849 --> 00:10:20,019
A CHRISTMAS
WITHOUT GRANDMA?
229
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:23,052
WHY, THAT'S
NO CHRISTMAS AT ALL.
230
00:10:23,053 --> 00:10:25,394
OH.
231
00:10:25,395 --> 00:10:27,326
MAESTRO, IF YOU WILL?
232
00:10:27,327 --> 00:10:29,029
YEAH.
233
00:10:34,865 --> 00:10:38,637
♪ OH, GRANDMOTHER,
OH, GRANDMOTHER ♪
234
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:41,070
♪ WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH,
GRANDMOTHER ♪
235
00:10:41,071 --> 00:10:44,343
♪ WE LOVE IT
WHEN YOU VISIT US ♪
236
00:10:44,344 --> 00:10:47,316
♪ AND YOU DON'T HAVE
TO BRING US STUFF ♪
237
00:10:47,317 --> 00:10:48,948
(children)
♪ OH, GRANDMOTHER ♪
238
00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:51,921
♪ OH, GRANDMOTHER ♪
239
00:10:51,922 --> 00:10:54,153
♪ WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH,
GRANDMOTHER ♪
240
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,826
OH!
241
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:59,328
OH, THAT'S SO DARLING.
242
00:10:59,329 --> 00:11:01,030
GREAT KIDS.
YEAH.
243
00:11:01,031 --> 00:11:02,992
YEAH.
(Andy playing recorder)
244
00:11:02,993 --> 00:11:06,095
HEY. HEY.
245
00:11:06,096 --> 00:11:08,168
I TOLD YOU,
WE CUT THAT.
246
00:11:12,102 --> 00:11:15,074
TONIGHT, RUBY SCROOGE,
247
00:11:15,075 --> 00:11:20,049
YOU WILL BE VISITED
BY THREE GRANDMOTHERS.
248
00:11:20,050 --> 00:11:22,281
TELL THEM NOT TO BOTHER.
I ALREADY HAVE ONE.
249
00:11:22,282 --> 00:11:24,253
(both) THE BEST GRANDMA
250
00:11:24,254 --> 00:11:27,116
IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
(Jim and Cheryl mouthing words)
251
00:11:27,117 --> 00:11:29,089
OH, OH.
252
00:11:32,262 --> 00:11:37,166
GOD BLESS US, EVERYONE,
ESPECIALLY GRANDMA.
253
00:11:37,167 --> 00:11:38,397
(gasps) OH.
254
00:11:38,398 --> 00:11:40,229
OH, COME ON.
GIVE ME A BREAK.
255
00:11:40,230 --> 00:11:41,771
(Maggie) OH...
256
00:11:41,772 --> 00:11:45,274
I JUST LOVE YOU KIDS. MM.
257
00:11:45,275 --> 00:11:46,776
(mouthing) NOW. NOW.
258
00:11:46,777 --> 00:11:49,939
THEN WHY AREN'T YOU
STAYING WITH US?
259
00:11:49,940 --> 00:11:50,940
OH.
260
00:11:50,941 --> 00:11:52,782
WELL, UM...
261
00:11:52,783 --> 00:11:54,784
UM, UM...
262
00:11:54,785 --> 00:11:56,786
UM...
WHY DON'T YOU JUST
263
00:11:56,787 --> 00:12:00,189
STICK YOUR HAND UP HER BUTT
AND WORK HER LIKE A PUPPET?
264
00:12:00,190 --> 00:12:03,853
WHY DON'T YOU JUST SHOVE IT?
265
00:12:03,854 --> 00:12:04,855
YEAH.
266
00:12:06,426 --> 00:12:08,457
AH, WHAT WAS I THINKING?
267
00:12:08,458 --> 00:12:10,429
I SHOULD SPEND
THE REST OF MY TRIP
268
00:12:10,430 --> 00:12:12,501
RIGHT HERE WITH THESE PRECIOUS
GRANDCHILDREN OF MINE.
269
00:12:12,502 --> 00:12:14,503
OH, MOM, I THINK
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA,
270
00:12:14,504 --> 00:12:16,505
'CAUSE, YOU KNOW,
OUR LITTLE TYKES
271
00:12:16,506 --> 00:12:18,507
WILL ONLY BE YOUNG
FOR A SHORT WHILE,
272
00:12:18,508 --> 00:12:20,109
AND YOU HAVE YEARS
TO BE WITH DANA AND RYAN
273
00:12:20,110 --> 00:12:22,112
IN THEIR
COLD, CHILDLESS HOME.
274
00:12:27,017 --> 00:12:29,018
(sighs) OKAY, THEN IT'S SETTLED.
275
00:12:29,019 --> 00:12:30,780
I AM STAYING HERE.
276
00:12:30,781 --> 00:12:33,222
(all) YAY!
277
00:12:33,223 --> 00:12:35,084
YEAH.
HEY, RYAN...
278
00:12:35,085 --> 00:12:36,155
YEAH?
279
00:12:36,156 --> 00:12:38,188
BAM!
280
00:12:40,090 --> 00:12:41,931
HEY, HEY, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
HEY, HEY, PEOPLE, PEOPLE.
281
00:12:41,932 --> 00:12:43,933
HOLD ON A SECOND NOW.
282
00:12:43,934 --> 00:12:45,935
I-I'VE BEEN PRACTICIN'
"SILENT NIGHT" FOR SIX HOURS.
283
00:12:45,936 --> 00:12:49,899
YOU PEOPLE ARE GONNA SIT DOWN
AND LISTEN TO ME PLAY.
284
00:12:49,900 --> 00:12:51,101
SIT DOWN!
285
00:12:54,544 --> 00:12:56,876
(plays "Silent Night")
286
00:12:56,877 --> 00:12:59,048
(squeaks)
287
00:12:59,049 --> 00:13:03,483
DAMN IT!
I HAD IT PERFECT LAST NIGHT!
288
00:13:08,088 --> 00:13:10,920
JIM, THAT WAS A MASTERFUL
CARVING JOB.
289
00:13:10,921 --> 00:13:12,922
HAD THAT PIG KNOWN
WHAT WAS IN STORE FOR HIM,
290
00:13:12,923 --> 00:13:14,964
HE WOULD HAVE GLADLY
GIVEN UP HIS LIFE.
291
00:13:14,965 --> 00:13:16,565
(Jim chuckles)
292
00:13:16,566 --> 00:13:18,567
THANK YOU, YOUNG ANDY,
THANK YOU,
293
00:13:18,568 --> 00:13:21,871
BUT I'M SURE DR. RYAN IS PRETTY
GOOD WITH A KNIFE, TOO,
294
00:13:21,872 --> 00:13:24,003
ALTHOUGH WE'LL NEVER
GET A CHANCE TO SEE IT.
295
00:13:24,004 --> 00:13:26,005
(laughs) WELL, I COULD COME OVER
296
00:13:26,006 --> 00:13:27,476
AND GIVE YOU A VASECTOMY
IN YOUR SLEEP.
297
00:13:27,477 --> 00:13:28,878
(Dana) AH.
298
00:13:28,879 --> 00:13:30,880
GIVE IT UP, RYAN.
WE'RE JUST NOT AS SELFISH
299
00:13:30,881 --> 00:13:32,481
AND TWISTED
AS, UH, CHERYL AND JIM.
300
00:13:32,482 --> 00:13:34,213
THAT'S RIGHT,
AND LET THAT BE A LESSON
301
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:36,215
TO THE BOTH OF YOU.
302
00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:37,216
UNH.
303
00:13:37,217 --> 00:13:40,119
OKAY, IT'S REALLY STRONG
EGGNOG TIME.
304
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:41,991
OH, YES.
305
00:13:41,992 --> 00:13:43,452
(Cheryl) HEY, MOM.
306
00:13:43,453 --> 00:13:44,954
GET THE KIDS
ALL TUCKED IN?
307
00:13:44,955 --> 00:13:47,326
SURE DID,
AND WATCHING LITTLE KYLE
308
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,328
ALL CURLED UP
IN THAT SUITCASE,
309
00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:51,330
OH, JUST PRECIOUS.
310
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:53,162
I'M SO GLAD
I'M HERE FOR THIS.
311
00:13:53,163 --> 00:13:55,164
AWW.
YOU KNOW WHAT, MAGGIE?
312
00:13:55,165 --> 00:13:57,566
WE'RE GLAD YOU'RE HERE, TOO.
EVERYBODY GRAB A DRINK.
313
00:13:57,567 --> 00:14:00,069
I'D LIKE TO MAKE
A TOAST TO MAGGIE.
314
00:14:00,070 --> 00:14:01,470
OH, NONE FOR ME.
THANKS, MOM.
315
00:14:01,471 --> 00:14:03,842
WHAT'S WRONG?
OH, NOTHING.
316
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:07,476
YEAH, WHAT'S WRONG, DANA,
DON'T YOU LOVE YOUR MOTHER?
317
00:14:07,477 --> 00:14:09,148
I MEAN, SHOULD WE TELL 'EM?
I MEAN...
318
00:14:09,149 --> 00:14:11,180
I DON'T... I DON'T THINK
THIS IS THE RIGHT TIME.
319
00:14:11,181 --> 00:14:13,352
(gasps) OH, MY GOD. I MEAN, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
I THINK IT WOULD BE THE RIGHT TIME.
320
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,084
YOU'RE PREGNANT.
321
00:14:15,085 --> 00:14:16,555
YES, I AM.
322
00:14:16,556 --> 00:14:18,988
OH! OH! OH!
323
00:14:18,989 --> 00:14:20,359
WHAT?
324
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:23,462
OH, GET READY
FOR A FOURTH GRANDCHILD.
325
00:14:23,463 --> 00:14:25,464
OH, RIGHT OVER HERE.
OH, LOOK, LOOK.
326
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:27,466
HUH? OH, YEAH.
(laughing)
327
00:14:27,467 --> 00:14:33,943
MOVE OVER, FRED AND ETHEL.
MAKE ROOM FOR LITTLE RICKY.
328
00:14:33,944 --> 00:14:36,145
HONEY, THIS IS JUST
WONDERFUL NEWS.
329
00:14:36,146 --> 00:14:38,147
YEAH, WE THOUGHT
YOU'D BE EXCITED, YOU KNOW,
330
00:14:38,148 --> 00:14:41,110
SINCE JIM AND CHERYL ARE
DONE HAVING KIDS. YEAH.
331
00:14:41,111 --> 00:14:42,651
YOU'RE NOT PREGNANT.
332
00:14:42,652 --> 00:14:44,313
CHERYL MABEL.
333
00:14:44,314 --> 00:14:46,015
BUT I... SHE'S LYING.
334
00:14:46,016 --> 00:14:47,186
NO, I'M NOT.
335
00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:48,287
YES, YOU ARE.
336
00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:49,989
YOU'RE JUST SAYING THAT
TO GET ATTENTION.
337
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,991
HOW CAN YOU SAY
SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
338
00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:56,295
HOW DARE YOU, CHERYL?
I HAVE LIFE INSIDE OF ME.
339
00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:59,298
PROVE IT.
PROVE YOU'RE PREGNANT.
340
00:14:59,299 --> 00:15:01,630
CHERYL, WHAT IF...
WHAT IF SHE'S... PROVE IT!
341
00:15:01,631 --> 00:15:06,605
FINE, IF IT'LL
MAKE YOU SHUT UP.
342
00:15:06,606 --> 00:15:09,138
HERE. HERE.
343
00:15:09,139 --> 00:15:11,240
READ THE DOUBLE
PINK LINES.
344
00:15:11,241 --> 00:15:13,312
(crying) IS THAT
PREGNANT ENOUGH FOR YOU?
345
00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:14,584
(gasps)
346
00:15:17,047 --> 00:15:19,618
LOOK, THAT'S JUST HER HORMONES
TALKIN', ALL RIGHT,
347
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:22,621
NOT ALL YOU GUYS YELLIN' AT HER
AND CALLIN' HER A LIAR...
348
00:15:22,622 --> 00:15:26,325
ON CHRISTMAS EVE.
349
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:28,498
OH.
350
00:15:33,603 --> 00:15:35,604
(crying)
OH, HONEY,
351
00:15:35,605 --> 00:15:38,067
IS... IS THAT WHY YOU WANTED
MOM TO STAY WITH YOU?
352
00:15:38,068 --> 00:15:41,070
(crying gibberish)
353
00:15:41,071 --> 00:15:42,371
WHAT?
354
00:15:42,372 --> 00:15:44,073
THAT MEANS, "YES."
355
00:15:44,074 --> 00:15:45,975
(crying gibberish)
356
00:15:45,976 --> 00:15:47,446
OH, I'M SORRY, HONEY.
357
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:49,448
"YES, YOU HEARTLESS
WICKED WITCH."
358
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:52,951
OH, I KNOW, I KNOW.
JIM GOT ME ALL WORKED UP
359
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,953
ABOUT BEING
THE PREMIER COUPLE.
360
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,986
YOU KNOW,
I'M STARTING TO THINK
361
00:15:56,987 --> 00:15:59,128
YOU WERE RIGHT
ABOUT HIM ALL ALONG.
362
00:15:59,129 --> 00:16:00,159
YES, I WAS.
363
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,360
CHERYL?
YEAH?
364
00:16:01,361 --> 00:16:03,362
CHERYL, DID YOU ALREADY
APOLOGIZE TO YOUR SISTER?
365
00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:07,036
I DID. I JUST HOPE
SHE CAN FORGIVE ME.
366
00:16:07,037 --> 00:16:09,638
WELL, I DON'T KNOW. IT'S
GONNA TAKE SOME TIME. I KNOW.
367
00:16:09,639 --> 00:16:11,640
WELL, MAYBE
YOU WOULD FEEL BETTER
368
00:16:11,641 --> 00:16:13,472
IF I HELPED YOU PICK OUT
SOME NAMES.
369
00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:14,673
(Cheryl) OH.
370
00:16:14,674 --> 00:16:16,575
LIKE, IF IT'S A GIRL,
HOW ABOUT LUCY?
371
00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:18,677
OH. (imitating Ricky
Ricardo) FOR, "LUCY,
372
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:20,379
"YOU GOT SOME
EXPLAINING TO DO!"
373
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:23,282
ALL RIGHT, MISTER, YOU GET
YOUR SCARF AND YOUR MITTENS.
374
00:16:23,283 --> 00:16:25,284
YOU MEET ME OUT BACK. WE'RE
GONNA SETTLE THIS LIKE MEN.
375
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:27,286
(imitates Ricky Ricardo)
OH, YEAH, LUCY, RICKY?
376
00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:30,159
(normal voice) WHAT'S THIS?
I FOUND THIS IN THE BATHROOM
377
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:32,161
ON THE FLOOR.
(Cheryl gasps)
378
00:16:32,162 --> 00:16:33,362
HERE'S YOUR BABY!
379
00:16:33,363 --> 00:16:37,166
YOU DREW THE PINK LINES?
380
00:16:37,167 --> 00:16:39,468
WELL, HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW
THAT PEN IS MINE?
381
00:16:39,469 --> 00:16:42,171
"FROM THE OFFICE
OF DR. RYAN GIBSON.
382
00:16:42,172 --> 00:16:46,004
"HAPPY HOLIDAYS."
383
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,006
CHERYL, CARE TO JOIN ME?
I WOULD LOVE TO.
384
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,009
(both) BAM! BAM! BAM!
385
00:16:52,412 --> 00:16:57,086
CHERYL, NOW IF YOU'LL JOIN ME,
LET'S GO TELL YOUR MOTHER. YES.
386
00:16:57,087 --> 00:16:59,318
HOLD UP, JIM, BEFORE YOU GO,
YOU SHOULD CHECK YOUR WATCH.
387
00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:01,520
WHY?
BECAUSE IT IS GO TIME.
388
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:03,122
(gasps) RYAN, HONEY!
OH! OH! OH!
389
00:17:03,123 --> 00:17:05,294
(yelling continues)
BOY, THAT CHERYL...
390
00:17:05,295 --> 00:17:07,126
NOT BELIEVIN'
HER OWN SISTER.
391
00:17:07,127 --> 00:17:12,301
YOU KNOW, POPS, I'M KINDA GLAD
YOU WEREN'T HERE TO SEE THAT.
392
00:17:12,302 --> 00:17:14,763
HEY, MAGGIE,
DANA'S NOT...
393
00:17:14,764 --> 00:17:17,035
(yelling continues)
WHAT IS GOING ON IN THERE?
394
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:19,037
AH, A LITTLE ROUGHHOUSING.
395
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:21,039
A LITTLE?
AND THAT DANA...
396
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:24,073
STEALIN' THE SPOTLIGHT
FROM BABY JESUS.
397
00:17:24,074 --> 00:17:26,645
WELL, AT LEAST YOU GOT
ONE GOOD ONE LEFT, MOM.
398
00:17:26,646 --> 00:17:29,418
OOH!
MOM... OOH!
399
00:17:29,419 --> 00:17:31,220
MOMMY!
(Maggie) OH.
400
00:17:31,221 --> 00:17:33,822
MAGGIE.
401
00:17:33,823 --> 00:17:34,823
MOM?
402
00:17:34,824 --> 00:17:39,088
MAGGIE, WAKE UP.
403
00:17:39,089 --> 00:17:41,431
DANA'S NOT PREGNANT.
404
00:17:43,193 --> 00:17:45,194
THERE YOU GO.
YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE.
405
00:17:45,195 --> 00:17:47,296
OH, THANK YOU, RYAN. OH.
406
00:17:47,297 --> 00:17:50,068
THANK GOODNESS WE HAVE A DOCTOR
IN THE FAMILY, HUH, MOM?
407
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,200
AH, YES. WHAT ARE YOU TALKIN'
ABOUT? IT'S MY FIRST AID KIT.
408
00:17:51,201 --> 00:17:52,701
YEAH.
409
00:17:52,702 --> 00:17:54,343
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT OPENED
THE DOOR RIGHT INTO HER. COME ON.
410
00:17:54,344 --> 00:17:57,207
JUST STOP IT! STOP.
411
00:17:59,279 --> 00:18:03,652
OH, LORD, COMPETING
FOR MY AFFECTION?
412
00:18:03,653 --> 00:18:05,654
CHRISTMAS IS A TIME
413
00:18:05,655 --> 00:18:07,756
WHEN YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO THINK
ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE,
414
00:18:07,757 --> 00:18:11,560
AND ALL YOU ARE DOING
IS THINKING ABOUT YOURSELVES.
415
00:18:11,561 --> 00:18:13,492
I'M ASHAMED OF YOU.
416
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:16,825
BUT NOT ME. RIGHT, MOM?
417
00:18:16,826 --> 00:18:18,827
YES, ANDY,
YOU'RE MY GOOD BOY.
418
00:18:18,828 --> 00:18:22,671
YES. BOO-YAH!
419
00:18:22,672 --> 00:18:24,803
ALTHOUGH WE'RE GOING
TO HAVE A LONG TALK
420
00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:28,106
ABOUT THAT FILTHY MAGAZINE
I FOUND IN YOUR BATHROOM.
421
00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:30,279
IT'S ANIME, GOD.
422
00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:32,611
WHAT?
423
00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:34,613
YOU KNOW, MAGGIE,
YOU'RE RIGHT.
424
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,145
(sighs)
425
00:18:36,146 --> 00:18:38,116
YOU'RE RIGHT. W-WE'VE BEEN
ACTIN' VERY, VERY SELFISHLY.
426
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:41,390
YEAH, WE ACTED CRAZY,
AND WE'RE SORRY.
427
00:18:41,391 --> 00:18:43,292
YEAH,
THE TRUTH IS, MAGGIE,
428
00:18:43,293 --> 00:18:47,296
THAT CHERYL AND I HAVE
HAD YOU FOR THE LAST 15 YEARS,
429
00:18:47,297 --> 00:18:50,460
AND IT'S TIME TO SHARE YOU
WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
430
00:18:52,462 --> 00:18:54,132
IT'S TIME FOR YOU
TO HAVE A CHANCE.
431
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,804
YOU KNOW, AND THAT'S HARD
FOR ME TO SAY
432
00:18:55,805 --> 00:18:58,237
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
I GREW UP WITHOUT A FATHER,
433
00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:01,740
AND I DON'T HAVE THE GREATEST
RELATIONSHIP WITH MY OWN MOTHER,
434
00:19:01,741 --> 00:19:03,712
BUT I DO WITH YOU.
435
00:19:03,713 --> 00:19:05,214
MM.
436
00:19:05,215 --> 00:19:07,176
YOU KNOW, NOT EVERY FAMILY
437
00:19:07,177 --> 00:19:09,178
GETS TO HAVE SOMEONE
LIKE YOU...
438
00:19:09,179 --> 00:19:11,180
SOMEONE
WHO YOU DON'T FIGHT WITH,
439
00:19:11,181 --> 00:19:12,821
BUT YOU'RE WILLING
TO FIGHT FOR.
440
00:19:12,822 --> 00:19:14,723
MM.
441
00:19:14,724 --> 00:19:16,585
Y-YOU KNOW...
442
00:19:16,586 --> 00:19:19,228
(Cheryl)
WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?
443
00:19:19,229 --> 00:19:22,861
CHERYL, IT'S ONLY FAIR.
444
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:24,863
WHAT,
YOUR CHRISTMAS ANGEL?
445
00:19:24,864 --> 00:19:26,865
MOM, WHEN YOU GAVE THIS TO US,
446
00:19:26,866 --> 00:19:31,170
IT REALLY MADE ME FEEL
PART OF THIS FAMILY...
447
00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:36,646
AND, RYAN, I-I THINK
YOU SHOULD FEEL THE SAME WAY.
448
00:19:40,380 --> 00:19:43,412
WOW, JIM, I-I REALLY
DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
449
00:19:43,413 --> 00:19:47,217
HOW 'BOUT,
UH, MERRY CHRISTMAS?
450
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:52,921
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
451
00:19:52,922 --> 00:19:54,964
RIGHT OVER HERE.
452
00:20:01,331 --> 00:20:04,673
JIM...
THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
453
00:20:04,674 --> 00:20:06,905
OH, THANK YOU, MAGGIE.
NOW THAT'S THE KIND OF LOVE
454
00:20:06,906 --> 00:20:08,907
YOU WANT TO BE AROUND
DURING THE HOLIDAYS,
455
00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:12,981
AND THE ONLY GIFT
I EVER WANT AT CHRISTMAS.
456
00:20:12,982 --> 00:20:15,213
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
457
00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:16,885
YOU, TOO, SWEETHEART.
458
00:20:16,886 --> 00:20:18,887
OH, WOW, IT'S LATE.
459
00:20:18,888 --> 00:20:20,849
MOM,
YOU MUST BE EXHAUSTED.
460
00:20:20,850 --> 00:20:22,851
UH, I AM, BUT
WITH ALL THE FIGHTING,
461
00:20:22,852 --> 00:20:24,853
I'VE LOST TRACK
OF WHERE I'M STAYING.
462
00:20:24,854 --> 00:20:26,855
OH, WELL, MOM,
THAT'S UP TO YOU.
463
00:20:26,856 --> 00:20:30,959
UH, RYAN, DO YOU HAVE
PAIN PILLS? OF COURSE.
464
00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:32,501
I'M STAYING WITH THEM.
GREAT.
465
00:20:32,502 --> 00:20:33,502
(laughs)
466
00:20:33,503 --> 00:20:35,504
OKAY, GOOD NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT.
467
00:20:35,505 --> 00:20:37,506
(Cheryl) GOOD NIGHT. AND I'LL BE
BACK FIRST THING IN THE MORNING
468
00:20:37,507 --> 00:20:39,508
TO SEE THE KIDS OPEN THEIR
PRESENTS. (Cheryl) ALL RIGHT. LOVE YOU.
469
00:20:39,509 --> 00:20:40,839
OKAY.
LOVE YOU, TOO.
470
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:42,841
WOW, BUDDY,
THAT WAS A GREAT SPEECH.
471
00:20:42,842 --> 00:20:44,843
GOT ME RIGHT
IN THE OLD TICKER.
472
00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:46,845
DAMN IT!
473
00:20:46,846 --> 00:20:49,848
I THOUGHT THE ANGEL THING
WAS GONNA WORK FOR SURE.
474
00:20:49,849 --> 00:20:51,850
I THOUGHT I HAD HER!
475
00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:53,852
THAT WAS THE GREATEST
PERFORMANCE OF MY LIFE!
476
00:20:53,853 --> 00:20:55,854
WAIT, JIM, YOU DIDN'T MEAN
WHAT YOU SAID?
477
00:20:55,855 --> 00:20:57,856
OF COURSE, I MEANT IT.
478
00:20:57,857 --> 00:20:59,928
I WAS JUST NOT GONNA
SAY IT TO ANYBODY.
479
00:20:59,929 --> 00:21:02,961
I WANTED TO WIN.
OH.
480
00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:04,963
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
WE GOT EASTER.
481
00:21:04,964 --> 00:21:06,965
WE GOTTA WIN MAGGIE BACK
AT EASTER.
482
00:21:06,966 --> 00:21:08,967
MM-HMM.
OKAY, START THINKIN'.
483
00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:10,939
START GIVIN' ME
SOME THINKIN' MUSIC.
484
00:21:10,940 --> 00:21:12,941
ALL RIGHT, I GOT IT.
I GOT IT. I GOT IT.
485
00:21:12,942 --> 00:21:14,943
(playing "What Child Is This?)
HAY. THE COLORED HAY.
486
00:21:14,944 --> 00:21:16,945
WE'RE GONNA NEED
LOTS OF THAT.
487
00:21:16,946 --> 00:21:18,947
AND BUNNIES...
LOTS OF LITTLE BUNNIES.
488
00:21:18,948 --> 00:21:20,048
(Cheryl) JIM.
489
00:21:20,049 --> 00:21:22,050
AND CHOCOLATE, BUT
YOU'RE RIGHT. NOT BIG ENOUGH.
490
00:21:22,051 --> 00:21:25,755
HOW 'BOUT AN EASTER EGG HUNT
IN THE BACK...
33283
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