All language subtitles for According to Jim S05E08 - James . the Annoying Peach (2005) WEB-DL 1080p.ENG

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,501 --> 00:00:03,504 (snoring) 2 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,007 UNCLE ANDY, WAKE UP, WAKE UP! 3 00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:09,509 WHAT? WHAT? UM... 4 00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,612 OH, WHAT DO YOU PUNKS WANT? 5 00:00:12,613 --> 00:00:15,646 COME IN THE KITCHEN. WE NEED YOUR HELP. 6 00:00:17,788 --> 00:00:20,320 YEAH... 7 00:00:20,321 --> 00:00:22,452 AND IF I GO INTO SAID KITCHEN, CHILDREN, 8 00:00:22,453 --> 00:00:24,454 IS IT POSSIBLE SOMETHING MIGHT FALL ON MY HEAD? 9 00:00:24,455 --> 00:00:25,796 YEAH, GO IN THERE! 10 00:00:27,698 --> 00:00:29,429 KYLE, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SAY "NO." 11 00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:31,531 HA HA HA. AH, MY LITTLE CHIMPS, 12 00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:33,603 UNCLE ANDY'S A LITTLE TOO SMART 13 00:00:33,604 --> 00:00:35,806 TO FALL FOR THE BUCKET-OVER-THE-DOOR GAG. 14 00:00:41,142 --> 00:00:44,544 THE PUDDING IN THE LOAFERS GAG, HOWEVER... 15 00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:46,616 (laughing) 16 00:00:46,617 --> 00:00:48,678 WHY, YOU! 17 00:00:48,679 --> 00:00:50,681 (screaming) 18 00:00:58,159 --> 00:00:59,160 OH, CRAP. 19 00:01:04,495 --> 00:01:09,499 (Jim laughs) 20 00:01:09,500 --> 00:01:11,671 THAT'LL TEACH YOUR UNCLE ANDY 21 00:01:11,672 --> 00:01:13,673 NOT TO SLEEP IN MY CHAIR! 22 00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:15,175 (laughing) 23 00:01:15,176 --> 00:01:17,247 IT'S STILL PUDDING. 24 00:01:17,248 --> 00:01:25,248 ♪♪♪ 25 00:01:26,117 --> 00:01:28,788 WHAT THEY DON'T TEACH YOU IN SCHOOL 26 00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:30,790 IS THAT OUR FOUNDING FATHERS SIGNED 27 00:01:30,791 --> 00:01:33,263 THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE IN PENCIL. 28 00:01:33,264 --> 00:01:36,366 SO SINCE THEY WERE IN PHILADELPHIA, 29 00:01:36,367 --> 00:01:40,131 THEY CALLED THE STATE PENCIL-VANIA. 30 00:01:47,838 --> 00:01:49,108 ALL RIGHT, KIDS, 31 00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:52,312 WHY DON'T YOU GO GET YOUR BACKPACKS READY? 32 00:01:52,313 --> 00:01:54,844 YOU KNOW, IF THEY SIGNED IT IN LOUISVILLE, 33 00:01:54,845 --> 00:01:57,218 IT WOULD HAVE BEEN CALLED PENCIL-TUCKY. 34 00:02:01,892 --> 00:02:05,155 THEY DON'T HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR, THESE GIRLS. 35 00:02:05,156 --> 00:02:07,657 LITTLE MORNING HUMOR, LITTLE JOKES. 36 00:02:07,658 --> 00:02:11,532 SO, HONEY, HOW ARE YOU THIS MORNING? 37 00:02:18,469 --> 00:02:19,769 HONEY? 38 00:02:19,770 --> 00:02:21,371 I'M FINE. 39 00:02:21,372 --> 00:02:24,714 I'M FINE. UH, I GOTTA GO TO WORK. I'M LATE. 40 00:02:24,715 --> 00:02:26,476 NO, WAIT. YOU'RE NOT LATE. 41 00:02:26,477 --> 00:02:28,418 HONEY, STAY, TALK TO ME. HAVE SOME PEACH. 42 00:02:28,419 --> 00:02:30,650 UNH-UNH. NO, THANK YOU. 43 00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:32,882 UH, I GOTTA GO, HONEY. I GOTTA GO. 44 00:02:32,883 --> 00:02:36,826 NO, JIM, EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, YOU RUSH RIGHT OFF. 45 00:02:36,827 --> 00:02:42,362 WELL, IT'S NOT RUSHING, HONEY. I JUST GOTTA GET TO WORK. 46 00:02:42,363 --> 00:02:44,865 HONEY, IS SOMETHING BOTHERING YOU? 47 00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:49,168 NO, NO, UH, I'M... I'M FINE. 48 00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:51,401 REALLY? 49 00:02:51,402 --> 00:02:53,843 IS IT... IS IT THE NEW SHEETS? 50 00:02:53,844 --> 00:02:56,446 WORK? 51 00:02:56,447 --> 00:02:58,448 (gasps) I KNOW. 52 00:02:58,449 --> 00:03:00,851 ARE THE BEARS HAVING TROUBLE SCORING RUNS? 53 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:06,557 I'M FINE. I'LL SEE YA TONIGHT. 54 00:03:08,259 --> 00:03:09,259 HEY, JIM. 55 00:03:09,260 --> 00:03:12,191 I'M FINE! 56 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,193 MAN, SOMETHING'S REALLY BOTHERING JIM. 57 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:17,327 I WISH I COULD GET HIM TO OPEN UP ABOUT IT. 58 00:03:17,328 --> 00:03:19,229 YOU KNOW, BEFORE RYAN AND I GOT MARRIED, 59 00:03:19,230 --> 00:03:20,870 WE WENT AND SAW A THERAPIST. 60 00:03:20,871 --> 00:03:21,871 OH, YEAH. 61 00:03:21,872 --> 00:03:23,773 MOM'S PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE ENGAGEMENT GIFT. 62 00:03:23,774 --> 00:03:25,204 YEAH. YEAH. 63 00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,206 RYAN TOTALLY OPENED UP, AND I LEARNED SO MUCH 64 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,208 ABOUT HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS MOTHER. 65 00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:31,441 SO NOW I CAN NAG HIM IN A WAY THAT'S DIFFERENT FROM HER. 66 00:03:31,442 --> 00:03:34,384 WOW. OH, I WISH I COULD GET JIM INTO THERAPY. 67 00:03:34,385 --> 00:03:36,386 THERE'S NO WAY. 68 00:03:36,387 --> 00:03:38,388 HE GOES TO A BARBER IN CHINATOWN 69 00:03:38,389 --> 00:03:40,520 JUST TO AVOID PERSONAL QUESTIONS. 70 00:03:40,521 --> 00:03:42,922 SO TRICK HIM INTO IT. 71 00:03:42,923 --> 00:03:44,924 OH, DANA, I COULD NEVER TRICK HIM. 72 00:03:44,925 --> 00:03:47,997 I MEAN, UNLESS YOU EXPLAINED HOW REALLY SLOWLY. 73 00:03:47,998 --> 00:03:50,560 WELL, I THINK YOU KNOW OUR THERAPIST, SALLY WOO. 74 00:03:50,561 --> 00:03:52,932 OH, YEAH, HER KID'S IN GRACIE'S CLASS... DAKOTA WOO. 75 00:03:52,933 --> 00:03:53,834 YEAH. YEAH. 76 00:03:53,835 --> 00:03:55,865 OKAY, SO INVITE SALLY OVER, 77 00:03:55,866 --> 00:03:57,867 TELL JIM SHE'S HERE FOR BRUNCH, 78 00:03:57,868 --> 00:04:00,570 AND THEN PUT OUT A BIG PLATE OF BACON. 79 00:04:00,571 --> 00:04:02,972 (gasps) OH, YOU KNOW, THE SCENT OF BREAKFAST MEATS 80 00:04:02,973 --> 00:04:04,674 ALWAYS RELAXES JIM. 81 00:04:04,675 --> 00:04:07,246 IT'S LIKE... IT'S LIKE HIS AROMATHERAPY. 82 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,978 EXACTLY. SO THEN YOU SET THE MOOD, 83 00:04:08,979 --> 00:04:10,950 AND YOU LET SALLY TAKE IT FROM THERE. 84 00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:13,252 WHAT IF IT DOESN'T WORK? 85 00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:14,984 WELL, THEN YOU SHOULD PACK YOUR BAGS, HIT THE ROAD, 86 00:04:14,985 --> 00:04:17,328 AND EARN YOUR KEEP AS A TABLE DANCER. 87 00:04:20,831 --> 00:04:22,462 (crowd cheering on TV) 88 00:04:22,463 --> 00:04:23,933 SO, JIM, 89 00:04:23,934 --> 00:04:26,966 CHERYL INVITES HER FRIEND SALLY OVER FOR BRUNCH, 90 00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:30,500 AND YOU INVITE ME. I SMELL A FIX UP. 91 00:04:30,501 --> 00:04:32,742 I DIDN'T INVITE YOU, ANDY. 92 00:04:32,743 --> 00:04:36,476 THEN MAYBE I JUST SMELL BACON. 93 00:04:36,477 --> 00:04:39,309 AND PLENTY OF IT, HUH? YOU KNOW WHAT? 94 00:04:39,310 --> 00:04:43,753 I FEEL SO RELAXED. 95 00:04:43,754 --> 00:04:47,056 I CAN'T TREAT JIM WITHOUT HIS PERMISSION. 96 00:04:47,057 --> 00:04:48,958 THERAPY IS BASED ON TRUST 97 00:04:48,959 --> 00:04:51,521 AND THE PATIENT'S WILLINGNESS TO PARTICIPATE. 98 00:04:51,522 --> 00:04:56,366 I'M SORRY. I JUST CAN'T JUSTIFY IT ETHICALLY. 99 00:04:56,367 --> 00:04:58,828 OH, THAT'S OKAY. IT'S TOO BAD, THOUGH, 100 00:04:58,829 --> 00:05:00,770 'CAUSE I WAS GONNA GIVE YOU MY RECIPE 101 00:05:00,771 --> 00:05:02,972 FOR SINFULLY SWEET DOUBLE CHUNK BROWNIES. 102 00:05:02,973 --> 00:05:05,805 (gasps) THE BROWNIES YOU WON 103 00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,508 THE SCHOOL BAKE-OFF WITH THREE TIMES? 104 00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:10,440 YEAH. 105 00:05:10,441 --> 00:05:12,412 I SHOULDN'T, THOUGH, YOU KNOW, 106 00:05:12,413 --> 00:05:14,414 'CAUSE I DON'T THINK I COULD JUSTIFY IT, 107 00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:17,488 YOU KNOW, ETHICALLY. 108 00:05:19,690 --> 00:05:20,751 OH. 109 00:05:21,892 --> 00:05:24,924 HALF NOW... 110 00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:28,799 HALF WHEN THE JOB IS DONE. 111 00:05:30,701 --> 00:05:32,402 HEY, SIS. 112 00:05:32,403 --> 00:05:34,764 ANDY. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 113 00:05:34,765 --> 00:05:36,335 JIM INVITED ME. 114 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:38,568 NO, I DIDN'T! 115 00:05:38,569 --> 00:05:40,440 AHEM. 116 00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:41,571 OH. 117 00:05:41,572 --> 00:05:44,013 SALLY, THIS IS MY BROTHER ANDY. 118 00:05:44,014 --> 00:05:46,045 HELLO. HI. 119 00:05:46,046 --> 00:05:48,718 SHE'S MARRIED. 120 00:05:48,719 --> 00:05:50,621 LET HER TELL ME. 121 00:05:53,724 --> 00:05:55,024 (Sally) SO... 122 00:05:55,025 --> 00:05:57,827 JIM, YOU'RE A CONTRACTOR. 123 00:05:57,828 --> 00:05:58,988 YES. 124 00:05:58,989 --> 00:06:00,860 THAT'S SORT OF A SEASONAL JOB, ISN'T IT? 125 00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:02,692 WELL, YEAH, SEASONAL. 126 00:06:02,693 --> 00:06:06,496 KINDA LIKE, UH, FOOTBALL, WHICH IS ON TV RIGHT NOW. 127 00:06:06,497 --> 00:06:08,998 THAT KIND OF WORK MUST MAKE YOU A LITTLE NERVOUS, 128 00:06:08,999 --> 00:06:11,471 UNSURE ABOUT THE FUTURE. 129 00:06:11,472 --> 00:06:13,943 WELL, NOT REALLY, BUT YOU KNOW WHO'S UNSURE ABOUT THE FUTURE? 130 00:06:13,944 --> 00:06:17,046 THESE FOOTBALL PLAYERS ON TV RIGHT NOW. 131 00:06:17,047 --> 00:06:20,149 DO YOU EVER WAKE UP IN THE MORNING 132 00:06:20,150 --> 00:06:23,714 AND JUST KIND OF WONDER IF IT'S ALL GONNA END? 133 00:06:26,817 --> 00:06:28,418 OH, GOD, I DO. 134 00:06:28,419 --> 00:06:31,020 (gasps) WE NEVER KNOW FROM MONTH TO MONTH 135 00:06:31,021 --> 00:06:33,663 IF THERE'S GONNA BE ANOTHER JOB. 136 00:06:33,664 --> 00:06:35,565 I GOT A MORTGAGE. I GOT A NEW CAR. 137 00:06:35,566 --> 00:06:37,567 I BOUGHT THE BIGGEST KARAOKE MACHINE THEY MAKE. 138 00:06:37,568 --> 00:06:38,998 I DON'T KNOW WHY. 139 00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:42,432 ANDY, HEY, HONEY, YOU WANT SOME BACON? 140 00:06:42,433 --> 00:06:45,436 WHAT? YOU WANT ME TO EAT MY FEELINGS? WHO ARE YOU, MOM? 141 00:06:46,977 --> 00:06:48,979 OH, WHO AM I KIDDING? 142 00:06:52,683 --> 00:06:55,985 JIM, I JUST THINK YOU MIGHT HAVE SOME INSECURITIES 143 00:06:55,986 --> 00:06:58,918 AND WOULD PROBABLY BENEFIT BY TALKING ABOUT THEM. 144 00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:02,893 HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL? 145 00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:08,929 LIKE I HAVE TWO WIVES. 146 00:07:11,902 --> 00:07:13,663 WHAT'S GOIN' ON? 147 00:07:13,664 --> 00:07:16,436 SALLY'S A THERAPIST. WHAT?! 148 00:07:17,668 --> 00:07:19,769 CHERYL... SO SHE'S HERE FOR ME, IS THAT IT? 149 00:07:19,770 --> 00:07:21,541 IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME? 150 00:07:21,542 --> 00:07:23,513 JIM, CHERYL WAS CONCERNED ABOUT YOU, 151 00:07:23,514 --> 00:07:25,715 AND SHE JUST THOUGHT I COULD HELP. 152 00:07:25,716 --> 00:07:28,047 YOU'RE TRYING TO TRICK ME INTO THERAPY? 153 00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:31,981 GOOD GOD, WOMAN, ON GAME DAY? 154 00:07:31,982 --> 00:07:33,983 HONEY, I-I JUST WANNA KNOW WHY YOU'VE BEEN 155 00:07:33,984 --> 00:07:35,885 SO QUIET AT BREAKFAST LATELY. 156 00:07:35,886 --> 00:07:37,957 YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT'S BOTHERING ME? YES. 157 00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,660 ALL RIGHT. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S BOTHERIN' ME. 158 00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:42,992 IT'S THE PEACHES. 159 00:07:42,993 --> 00:07:43,993 WHAT? 160 00:07:43,994 --> 00:07:45,995 IT'S THE CRAZY, BIZARRO WAY 161 00:07:45,996 --> 00:07:48,167 YOU EAT THE PEACHES! 162 00:07:48,168 --> 00:07:51,000 YOU CUT UP THOSE PEACHES INTO LITTLE CUBES, 163 00:07:51,001 --> 00:07:52,471 AND YOU GOT THE COLORED TOOTHPICKS 164 00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:55,975 AND YOU PICK... EACH... ONE... OUT, AND YOU... 165 00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:57,977 THEN YOU PUT IT BACK IN THE PEACH! 166 00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:02,912 NOBODY EATS PEACHES LIKE THAT! WHO EATS PEACHES LIKE THAT?! 167 00:08:02,913 --> 00:08:06,185 HONEY, THAT CAN'T BE IT. I MEAN, THAT'S NOTHING. 168 00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:09,719 I KNOW IT'S NOTHING. THAT'S WHY I TOLD YOU IT WAS NOTHING. 169 00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:11,721 IT FEELS BAD IN THE MOMENT, 170 00:08:11,722 --> 00:08:13,723 AND THEN WHEN YOU'RE DONE, IT PASSES. 171 00:08:13,724 --> 00:08:16,065 IT'S JUST LIKE WHEN A DOCTOR CHECKS YOUR PROSTATE. 172 00:08:16,066 --> 00:08:19,028 EXACTLY. 173 00:08:19,029 --> 00:08:21,070 YOU'RE LOOKIN' FORWARD TO IT FOR WEEKS, 174 00:08:21,071 --> 00:08:23,133 AND THEN IT'S OVER LIKE THAT. 175 00:08:24,605 --> 00:08:26,606 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 176 00:08:26,607 --> 00:08:28,608 (chuckles) IT'S NOT LIKE THAT. 177 00:08:28,609 --> 00:08:31,141 UM, MY DOCTOR'S A WOMAN. 178 00:08:33,644 --> 00:08:36,787 HOW ARE YOUR TUESDAY AFTERNOONS? 179 00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:45,995 IS IT REALLY ABOUT THE PEACHES? 180 00:08:45,996 --> 00:08:51,801 YES, CHERYL, IT'S ABOUT THE PEACHES. 181 00:08:51,802 --> 00:08:54,904 IT'S JUST ABOUT... 182 00:08:54,905 --> 00:08:56,306 THE PEACHES! 183 00:08:58,208 --> 00:09:00,209 DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT DR. SALLY SAID? 184 00:09:00,210 --> 00:09:02,311 CUTTIN' UP THOSE PEACHES IN THOSE LITTLE CUBES... 185 00:09:02,312 --> 00:09:03,673 IT'S OBSESSIVE. 186 00:09:03,674 --> 00:09:08,678 JIM, I CAN'T ALLOW THE JUICE TO TOUCH MY FACE. 187 00:09:08,679 --> 00:09:10,980 WHAT'S OBSESSIVE ABOUT THAT? 188 00:09:10,981 --> 00:09:12,582 I DON'T KNOW. 189 00:09:12,583 --> 00:09:15,124 WHY DON'T YOU TRICK YOURSELF INTO THERAPY AND FIND OUT? 190 00:09:15,125 --> 00:09:17,657 OKAY, HONEY, LOOK, 191 00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:19,328 IF IT WAS REALLY ABOUT THE PEACHES, 192 00:09:19,329 --> 00:09:21,560 WHY COULDN'T YOU JUST TELL ME? 193 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:24,033 BECAUSE I'M THE KIND OF GUY WHO LIKES TO SLEEP 194 00:09:24,034 --> 00:09:26,736 INSTEAD OF TALKING ABOUT SUMMER FRUIT ALL NIGHT! 195 00:09:26,737 --> 00:09:30,099 IS IT SO WEIRD THAT I WANNA KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS? 196 00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:33,002 HONEY, YOU WANNA KNOW ALL OF MY THOUGHTS. 197 00:09:33,003 --> 00:09:35,975 NOT EVERY THOUGHT HAS TO BE PUT INTO YOUR PRECIOUS WORDS. 198 00:09:35,976 --> 00:09:37,977 YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO THOUGHTS 199 00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:41,280 WHEN THEY DON'T COME OUT? YES, THEY GO AWAY. 200 00:09:41,281 --> 00:09:43,282 BUT NOT WITH YOU. 201 00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:45,584 NO, YOU WANNA TALK AND TALK AND TALK 202 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,587 AND THEN TALK SOME MORE. OH, I GUESS IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR YOU 203 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,260 IF I DIDN'T TALK AT ALL. 204 00:09:53,123 --> 00:09:55,895 IS THAT ON THE MENU? 205 00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:59,298 OH, COME ON. YOU'D BE A MESS IN THREE DAYS. 206 00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:02,972 (laughs) ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME? I'D LOVE IT. 207 00:10:02,973 --> 00:10:06,035 YOU KNOW, HONEY, SOME MEN DREAM OF SEX. 208 00:10:06,036 --> 00:10:09,108 I DREAM OF SILENCE... 209 00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:11,140 AND SEX. 210 00:10:11,141 --> 00:10:13,683 ARE YOU SERIOUS? 211 00:10:13,684 --> 00:10:15,084 YEAH. 212 00:10:15,085 --> 00:10:17,847 FINE. FINE. THREE DAYS. 213 00:10:17,848 --> 00:10:20,320 I'M NOT GONNA TALK TO YOU FOR THREE DAYS. 214 00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:33,963 YOU'RE NOT GONNA LAST. 215 00:10:33,964 --> 00:10:36,305 I CAN, AND I WILL. 216 00:10:36,306 --> 00:10:38,037 AH. THREE SECONDS. YOU JUST BROKE IT. 217 00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:40,309 WELL, COME ON, HONEY, WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT... 218 00:10:40,310 --> 00:10:42,242 BAP, BAP, BAP, BAP, BAPPETY, BAPPETY, BE BA BAP. 219 00:10:58,428 --> 00:11:01,761 AH, I KINDA LIKE THIS. 220 00:11:01,762 --> 00:11:03,432 IT'S SO... 221 00:11:03,433 --> 00:11:05,696 NON-TALKY. 222 00:11:08,198 --> 00:11:10,039 OH, BY THE WAY... 223 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:12,102 YOU EAT GRAPES WEIRD, TOO. 224 00:11:14,374 --> 00:11:16,345 OH, AND YOU KNOW WHAT? 225 00:11:16,346 --> 00:11:18,348 THE CHILDREN ARE SMART BECAUSE OF ME. 226 00:11:23,854 --> 00:11:27,717 YOU KNOW WHAT? I NEVER REALLY LIKED OPRAH. 227 00:11:27,718 --> 00:11:29,358 (gasps) 228 00:11:29,359 --> 00:11:32,021 OH, ONE MORE THING... 229 00:11:32,022 --> 00:11:34,163 I LOVE YOU, HONEY, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? 230 00:11:34,164 --> 00:11:37,297 I NEVER WASH MY HANDS AFTER I GO TO THE BATHROOM. OH! 231 00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:51,111 (whistles) 232 00:11:53,784 --> 00:11:58,287 GOOD MORNING TO YOU, MY FINE YOUNG LASS. 233 00:11:58,288 --> 00:12:01,751 AH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING IT IS. 234 00:12:01,752 --> 00:12:03,753 HEY, DID YOU KNOW 235 00:12:03,754 --> 00:12:08,097 THAT THE BIRDS WERE SINGING OUTSIDE OUR BEDROOM WINDOW? 236 00:12:08,098 --> 00:12:11,901 AND I HEARD THEM... 237 00:12:11,902 --> 00:12:14,064 FOR THE FIRST TIME. 238 00:12:18,108 --> 00:12:20,109 OH, HERE'S AN INTERESTING ARTICLE. 239 00:12:20,110 --> 00:12:22,111 THERE'S A MAN HERE THAT'S JUST BEEN 240 00:12:22,112 --> 00:12:25,314 REUNITED WITH HIS FATHER AFTER 32 YEARS. 241 00:12:25,315 --> 00:12:27,116 GEE... 242 00:12:27,117 --> 00:12:29,748 THAT'S ALMOST AS LONG AS IT'S BEEN 243 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,751 SINCE I'VE SEEN MY FATHER. 244 00:12:34,024 --> 00:12:35,354 WHAT'S THAT LOOK? 245 00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:37,927 WHAT'S IT MEAN, CHERYL? 246 00:12:37,928 --> 00:12:40,831 DOES IT MEAN, "HOW DO YOU FEEL, JIM?" 247 00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:45,765 OR IS IT, "I WONDER WHAT MARMADUKE IS UP TO"? 248 00:12:51,101 --> 00:12:53,042 (laughs) 249 00:12:53,043 --> 00:12:56,406 THAT DOG IS WAY TOO BIG TO RIDE IN THAT BUS. 250 00:13:01,982 --> 00:13:03,112 HEY. 251 00:13:03,113 --> 00:13:04,253 HEY. 252 00:13:04,254 --> 00:13:05,955 WHAT ARE YOU WRITING? 253 00:13:05,956 --> 00:13:07,957 IN EXACTLY TWO MINUTES, 254 00:13:07,958 --> 00:13:09,959 MY THREE DAYS OF SILENCE ARE OVER. 255 00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:11,991 SO I'M MAKING A LIST OF EVERYTHING THAT'S BUGGING JIM. 256 00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:14,063 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE ONLY ON HERE TWICE? 257 00:13:14,064 --> 00:13:16,195 HMM. WELL, I WAS BUSY WITH WORK. OH. 258 00:13:16,196 --> 00:13:18,367 SO IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TALKING TO JIM, 259 00:13:18,368 --> 00:13:20,369 HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S BUGGIN' HIM? 260 00:13:20,370 --> 00:13:22,171 OH, IT'S EASY. EVERYTHING BUGS HIM. OH. 261 00:13:22,172 --> 00:13:25,034 YOU KNOW, I SAW HIM GET IN A FIGHT WITH A NAPKIN ONCE? 262 00:13:25,035 --> 00:13:27,076 YEAH. SO WHY IS THAT YOUR PROBLEM? 263 00:13:27,077 --> 00:13:28,507 DANA, IT'S MY JOB. 264 00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:31,140 IF JIM DOESN'T TALK ABOUT THESE THINGS WITH ME, 265 00:13:31,141 --> 00:13:34,043 THEN THE PRESSURE BUILDS UP, AND HE EXPLODES. 266 00:13:34,044 --> 00:13:36,115 OKAY, SO JIM GETS THREE DAYS OF QUIET, 267 00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:39,048 AND THEN YOU RUSH IN AND YOU FIX ALL HIS PROBLEMS? 268 00:13:39,049 --> 00:13:42,021 I SAY, ZIP YOUR LIP AND LET HIM BLOW. 269 00:13:42,022 --> 00:13:45,925 IS THAT ON THE MENU? 270 00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:47,957 AHEM. 271 00:13:47,958 --> 00:13:51,400 OH, HERE COMES MY YOUNG, SILENT BRIDE, 272 00:13:51,401 --> 00:13:54,103 AND BY THE OFFICIAL TIMEPIECE, 273 00:13:54,104 --> 00:13:56,135 YOU'VE MADE IT. 274 00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,968 ALL RIGHT, SIT DOWN. 275 00:13:58,969 --> 00:14:02,111 YOU'VE GOT THREE DAYS OF YAP STORED UP. 276 00:14:02,112 --> 00:14:05,474 LET IT RIP. 277 00:14:05,475 --> 00:14:07,516 ACTUALLY, JIM, CHERYL'S NOT GONNA DO THAT. 278 00:14:07,517 --> 00:14:10,119 YOUR WIFE HAS REALIZED THAT NOTHING SHE WAS GONNA SAY TO YOU 279 00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:13,852 IN THE LAST THREE DAYS WAS IMPORTANT. YOU WERE RIGHT. 280 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:14,984 (gasps) 281 00:14:14,985 --> 00:14:17,356 A SILENT "YOU WERE RIGHT." 282 00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,328 OH, YOU DREAM OF ONE, 283 00:14:19,329 --> 00:14:22,031 BUT YOU NEVER THINK IT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 284 00:14:22,032 --> 00:14:24,033 SO AS OF NOW, CHERYL IS COMPLETELY 285 00:14:24,034 --> 00:14:26,435 GIVING UP TALKING TO YOU. 286 00:14:26,436 --> 00:14:28,267 AND YOU'RE OKAY WITH THAT? 287 00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:32,101 NOTHIN' ELSE IS GONNA CHANGE? YOU'RE HAPPY? 288 00:14:32,102 --> 00:14:35,645 (laughs) CARRY ON, BABY! 289 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:41,911 CHERYL ALSO WANTED ME TO TELL YOU YOU'RE A JACKASS. 290 00:14:41,912 --> 00:14:43,983 FINE, THAT ONE WAS FROM ME. 291 00:14:43,984 --> 00:14:47,486 (laughs) 292 00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:48,487 JIM. 293 00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:50,019 WHAT? 294 00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:53,662 ARE YOU GONNA BE OKAY WITH HER NOT TALKING TO YOU AGAIN? 295 00:14:53,663 --> 00:14:56,625 ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME? SHE'S NOT GONNA MAKE THE WEEK, 296 00:14:56,626 --> 00:14:58,627 AND UNTIL THEN, LET ME TELL YA, 297 00:14:58,628 --> 00:15:00,899 I'M GONNA ENJOY EVERY MINUTE OF IT. 298 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:03,673 COME ON. HOT, BLONDE AND SILENT. 299 00:15:05,635 --> 00:15:08,378 I'VE BUILT THE PERFECT WIFE. 300 00:15:14,014 --> 00:15:18,088 MOM'S GONNA LOVE THIS. MM. 301 00:15:21,051 --> 00:15:23,352 I'M FINE, BY THE WAY. 302 00:15:23,353 --> 00:15:25,594 WHAT? 303 00:15:25,595 --> 00:15:27,596 WELL, WOULD IT KILL YOU TO ASK ME HOW I'M DOIN'? 304 00:15:27,597 --> 00:15:29,628 I MEAN, WE'VE BEEN HERE FOR THREE HOURS. 305 00:15:29,629 --> 00:15:32,431 OKAY. HOW YOU DOIN', JIM? 306 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,433 I SAID I WAS FINE. 307 00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:39,068 I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT. JEEZ. GET OFF MY BACK. 308 00:15:39,069 --> 00:15:43,572 JIM, UH, IN MY WORK WITH DR. SALLY WOO, 309 00:15:43,573 --> 00:15:47,116 I'VE LEARNED ABOUT THE DANGERS OF UNPROCESSED FEELINGS. 310 00:15:47,117 --> 00:15:51,150 SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH. 311 00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:52,982 YOU HEAR THAT? 312 00:15:52,983 --> 00:15:54,023 WHAT? 313 00:15:54,024 --> 00:15:57,226 (buzzing) 314 00:15:57,227 --> 00:16:00,259 THE FLY. YOU HEAR THAT FLY? 315 00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:04,364 THE LITTLE BUGGER'S BEEN TORMENTING ME ALL DAY. 316 00:16:05,996 --> 00:16:08,597 IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY. 317 00:16:08,598 --> 00:16:12,142 RIGHT. THE FLY. 318 00:16:15,005 --> 00:16:17,676 ARE YOU SURE IT'S THE FLY THAT'S TORMENTING YOU? 319 00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,079 UHH! WHAT ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT? 320 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,511 UHH! JIM. 321 00:16:24,114 --> 00:16:26,585 (Both) AAH! 322 00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:27,716 AAH. 323 00:16:27,717 --> 00:16:32,421 JIM! JIM, GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF. 324 00:16:32,422 --> 00:16:35,424 YOU'RE LOSIN' IT, MAN. 325 00:16:35,425 --> 00:16:38,427 YEAH. YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT. 326 00:16:38,428 --> 00:16:40,599 I SHOULD SETTLE DOWN. 327 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,071 YEAH. 328 00:16:42,072 --> 00:16:44,473 IT'S JUST A FLY. 329 00:16:44,474 --> 00:16:46,075 FOOLED YA! 330 00:16:46,076 --> 00:16:48,006 JIM! 331 00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:49,638 GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, MAN! 332 00:16:49,639 --> 00:16:54,343 THESE PRETZELS WERE COMPLETELY INNOCENT. 333 00:16:54,344 --> 00:16:56,145 OH! 334 00:16:56,146 --> 00:16:58,748 OKAY, GIVE ME THAT BAT! COME AND GET IT! 335 00:17:02,092 --> 00:17:04,094 (deep voice, British accent) ENOUGH. 336 00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:14,504 LET GO OF YOUR ANGER. 337 00:17:17,107 --> 00:17:19,768 (normal voice) THERE YOU GO. 338 00:17:19,769 --> 00:17:21,770 NOW I KNOW YOU SAY THAT YOU'RE HAPPY 339 00:17:21,771 --> 00:17:24,143 THAT CHERYL ISN'T TALKING TO YOU, 340 00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:28,247 BUT FROM WHERE I STAND, SOMETHIN' AIN'T RIGHT. 341 00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:30,149 EVERYTHING IS FINE. 342 00:17:30,150 --> 00:17:32,151 THEN GIVE ME THE BAT. 343 00:17:32,152 --> 00:17:34,083 NO! UHH! 344 00:17:34,084 --> 00:17:37,086 (deep voice) GIVE ME THE BAT. 345 00:17:37,087 --> 00:17:40,429 (grunts) FINE. 346 00:17:40,430 --> 00:17:43,262 TAKE IT. 347 00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:45,394 (sighs) 348 00:17:45,395 --> 00:17:48,137 (imitates lightsaber sound) 349 00:17:48,138 --> 00:17:52,701 JEEPERS, JIM. SOMETIMES YOU REALLY WORRY ME. 350 00:17:52,702 --> 00:17:54,243 SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH. 351 00:17:54,244 --> 00:17:56,675 (whispers) HOLD STILL. 352 00:17:56,676 --> 00:18:00,550 AND WHY IS THAT, JIM? 353 00:18:04,614 --> 00:18:06,355 (gags) 354 00:18:06,356 --> 00:18:09,288 TALK TO YOUR WIFE. 355 00:18:09,289 --> 00:18:11,820 (gags) 356 00:18:11,821 --> 00:18:14,794 (imitates lightsaber sound) 357 00:18:22,672 --> 00:18:27,136 YEAH. ANDY THINKS THAT THERE'S SOMETHIN' BOTHERING ME. 358 00:18:27,137 --> 00:18:31,281 I THINK HE'S NUTS. I MEAN, I KILLED THE DAMN FLY. 359 00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:38,587 I MEAN, YOU KNOW, UNLESS YOU THINK 360 00:18:38,588 --> 00:18:40,550 THERE'S SOMETHING BOTHERING ME. 361 00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:50,229 FINE. FINE. DON'T TALK TO ME. 362 00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:52,801 DON'T TELL ME WHAT'S BOTHERIN' ME. 363 00:18:52,802 --> 00:18:55,304 I DON'T NEED TO KNOW. I DON'T NEED YOU. 364 00:18:55,305 --> 00:18:57,336 I DON'T NEED YOU. 365 00:18:57,337 --> 00:18:59,368 I CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT'S BOTHERIN' ME. 366 00:18:59,369 --> 00:19:01,210 I-I KNOW WHAT'S BOTHERIN' ME. 367 00:19:01,211 --> 00:19:03,212 THE SAME THING THAT'S ALWAYS BOTHERED ME... 368 00:19:03,213 --> 00:19:07,447 TAXES! TAXES AND TRAFFIC! 369 00:19:08,818 --> 00:19:11,421 MONEY? 370 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,653 SOMETHING WITH THE KIDS? 371 00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:16,525 COME ON, CHERYL! 372 00:19:16,526 --> 00:19:19,157 FORGET IT! FORGET IT! I CAN FIGURE IT OUT MYSELF! 373 00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:22,160 THERE'S TOO MUCH SILENCE IN HERE, AND I CAN'T CONCENTRATE, 374 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:25,163 THAT'S ALL IT IS! I'M JUST GONNA GO IN THE OTHER ROOM, 375 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:28,166 MAKE SOME NOISE, AND I'M GONNA FIGURE IT OUT MY DAMN SELF! 376 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:32,642 (pounding and grunting) 377 00:19:34,804 --> 00:19:36,875 I THINK I KNOW WHAT'S BOTHERING YOU. 378 00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:40,449 REALLY? 379 00:19:40,450 --> 00:19:43,512 EVERYTHING. 380 00:19:43,513 --> 00:19:44,853 EVERYTHING? 381 00:19:44,854 --> 00:19:48,186 YEAH, JIM. EVERYTHING BOTHERS YOU. 382 00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:49,918 WELL, THAT SOUNDS... 383 00:19:49,919 --> 00:19:52,391 SOUNDS RIGHT. 384 00:19:52,392 --> 00:19:55,193 YEAH. SEE, JIM, YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO. 385 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:57,195 YOU NEED A SOUNDING BOARD. 386 00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:58,827 FOR THE LAST 15 YEARS, 387 00:19:58,828 --> 00:20:00,829 THAT SOUNDING BOARD HAS BEEN ME. 388 00:20:00,830 --> 00:20:02,771 YOU MISS ME. 389 00:20:02,772 --> 00:20:05,434 THAT'S NOT IT, CHERYL. THAT'S NOT IT. 390 00:20:05,435 --> 00:20:08,206 THAT'S NOT IT. I LIKE THE SILENCE. 391 00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:10,409 OH, OKAY. 392 00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:11,680 I DO. 393 00:20:11,681 --> 00:20:13,342 OKAY. 394 00:20:13,343 --> 00:20:16,445 IT'S JUST... 395 00:20:16,446 --> 00:20:20,589 I JUST DON'T LIKE BEING OUT THERE ALONE. 396 00:20:20,590 --> 00:20:23,922 TOO MANY THINGS GET BROKEN. 397 00:20:23,923 --> 00:20:27,396 AND HOW IS THAT DIFFERENT FROM YOU MISS ME? 398 00:20:27,397 --> 00:20:29,728 I DON'T KNOW. 399 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:33,001 IT'S NOT SO GIRLY. 400 00:20:33,002 --> 00:20:34,533 HONEY. 401 00:20:34,534 --> 00:20:35,664 WHAT? 402 00:20:35,665 --> 00:20:37,966 OH, WHEN I ASK YOU WHAT'S BOTHERING YOU, 403 00:20:37,967 --> 00:20:40,809 I'M NOT TRYING TO UPSET YOU. I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU. 404 00:20:40,810 --> 00:20:42,541 I KNOW THAT NOW. UH-HUH. 405 00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:44,543 I DO. GOOD. 406 00:20:44,544 --> 00:20:47,416 AND THANK YOU. YOU'RE WELCOME. 407 00:20:47,417 --> 00:20:49,418 I DO MISS YOU. I KNOW. 408 00:20:49,419 --> 00:20:51,420 I MEAN, YOU KNOW, A LITTLE BIT. 409 00:20:51,421 --> 00:20:53,251 (laughs) 410 00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:54,953 (exhales deeply) 411 00:20:54,954 --> 00:20:57,356 (sighs) MM. 412 00:20:57,357 --> 00:20:59,358 YOU KNOW, CHERYL... HMM? 413 00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:01,860 YOU DON'T HAVE TO KNOW EVERY THOUGHT 414 00:21:01,861 --> 00:21:04,493 THAT'S GOIN' ON IN MY MIND. 415 00:21:04,494 --> 00:21:09,568 I MEAN, SOMETIMES A PEACH IS JUST A PEACH, CHERYL. 416 00:21:09,569 --> 00:21:13,872 I KNOW. I KNOW. HONEY, I TOTALLY GET THAT, 417 00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:16,575 AND TO SHOW YOU THE VALUE OF GOOD COMMUNICATION... 418 00:21:16,576 --> 00:21:18,777 (gasps) 419 00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:22,811 OH, THAT IS SO HOT! 420 00:21:22,812 --> 00:21:23,882 CHERYL? 421 00:21:23,883 --> 00:21:27,886 AAH! JUICE ON MY FACE! JUICE ON MY FACE! 422 00:21:27,887 --> 00:21:30,019 I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT. OH! OH! OH! 27334

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