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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,220 --> 00:00:07,007 [Joy] Hot in Clevelandis recorded in front of a live studio audience. 2 00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:10,358 One month from today, I'’m getting married in Paris. 3 00:00:10,401 --> 00:00:12,621 Why are you telling us things we already know? 4 00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:14,710 Because I love saying it so much. 5 00:00:14,753 --> 00:00:16,973 And it distracts me from my little procedure today. 6 00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:20,281 Joy'’s getting her sixth toe removed. 7 00:00:20,324 --> 00:00:21,978 It'’s not a toe. 8 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:24,111 It'’s a small nub of cartilage with a half-nail. 9 00:00:26,287 --> 00:00:29,768 I'’m gonna miss Joy's stumpy little claw. 10 00:00:29,812 --> 00:00:32,206 It helped me lose weight for the Oscars. 11 00:00:32,249 --> 00:00:34,991 Oh, just thinking about it killed my appetite. 12 00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:37,080 Well, say good-bye. 13 00:00:37,124 --> 00:00:38,690 I need my feet to look perfect 14 00:00:38,734 --> 00:00:40,562 for my dress fitting this Friday. 15 00:00:40,605 --> 00:00:42,042 Now, hand me that nail polish. 16 00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:43,608 Just because it'’s being chopped off 17 00:00:43,652 --> 00:00:44,783 doesn'’t mean it can't be pretty. 18 00:00:47,438 --> 00:00:49,049 Oh, I'’m so happy for Joy and Bob. 19 00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:51,355 I just can'’t stand the idea of her moving out. 20 00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:52,791 It'’s funny. 21 00:00:52,835 --> 00:00:57,013 I spent five years wishing Joy would be gone. 22 00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,754 And now you'’re sad? 23 00:00:58,797 --> 00:01:02,671 No, I'’m just telling what I'’ve been doing. 24 00:01:02,714 --> 00:01:03,976 Well, I'’m sad she's going. 25 00:01:04,019 --> 00:01:06,153 I am gonna miss her like crazy. 26 00:01:06,196 --> 00:01:08,894 Me too. 27 00:01:08,938 --> 00:01:11,375 This house is gonna seem so empty without her. 28 00:01:11,419 --> 00:01:12,376 I know. 29 00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:14,030 Victoria, we can'’t do this. 30 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,336 I mean, come on. 31 00:01:15,379 --> 00:01:17,207 I mean, when my daughter went off to college, 32 00:01:17,251 --> 00:01:20,254 I was so sad, I made everybody ten times more miserable. 33 00:01:20,297 --> 00:01:22,646 We have got to show Joy that we'’re gonna be okay without her. 34 00:01:22,691 --> 00:01:23,779 Brave faces from everybody. 35 00:01:23,822 --> 00:01:25,128 Yeah, you'’re right. 36 00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:26,347 We just need to tamp down our feelings, 37 00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:28,349 and it'’ll be good for us too. 38 00:01:28,392 --> 00:01:30,351 No, I don'’t like dwelling on sad things. 39 00:01:30,394 --> 00:01:33,396 That'’s why I got divorced so many times. 40 00:01:33,441 --> 00:01:34,658 Hey, you. 41 00:01:34,703 --> 00:01:36,226 You ready to go to the doctor'’s office? 42 00:01:36,270 --> 00:01:38,140 No, I want to wait until my mother gets here. 43 00:01:38,185 --> 00:01:41,449 And fair warning; she'’s gonna be even meaner than usual. 44 00:01:41,491 --> 00:01:43,364 Her boyfriend Daniel just broke up with her. 45 00:01:43,407 --> 00:01:45,931 So you sent Bob to the airport to deal with her? 46 00:01:45,975 --> 00:01:47,933 Well, it was either him or me, and I didn'’t want to do it. 47 00:01:50,632 --> 00:01:52,634 Hello, everyone. 48 00:01:52,676 --> 00:01:54,157 - Hi, Mom. - Hello. 49 00:01:54,201 --> 00:01:56,942 Joy, I was telling Philipa I'’m not just gaining a wife, 50 00:01:56,985 --> 00:01:58,988 but a beautiful mother-in-law as well. 51 00:01:59,031 --> 00:02:00,642 Oh, you. 52 00:02:00,685 --> 00:02:02,165 Well, Rejoyla, 53 00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:05,690 your future husband is not what I was expecting. 54 00:02:05,734 --> 00:02:08,476 He'’s not drunk or in prison. 55 00:02:08,519 --> 00:02:10,651 Philipa, why don'’t I take your bags to your room 56 00:02:10,695 --> 00:02:11,653 so you can freshen up? 57 00:02:11,696 --> 00:02:13,742 Oh, what a gentleman. 58 00:02:13,785 --> 00:02:15,657 Oh, Joy doesn'’t deserve you. 59 00:02:17,702 --> 00:02:19,182 Wouldn'’t it have been easier for your mom 60 00:02:19,226 --> 00:02:20,662 to just join us in Paris for the wedding? 61 00:02:20,704 --> 00:02:23,012 Yes, but my mother'’s never been easy. 62 00:02:23,055 --> 00:02:25,101 So you must get it from your dad. 63 00:02:32,848 --> 00:02:34,805 I am sorry, Joy. 64 00:02:34,850 --> 00:02:37,418 There is nothing worse than a parent showing up unannounced. 65 00:02:37,461 --> 00:02:38,723 Hello, ladies. 66 00:02:38,767 --> 00:02:40,464 Daddy. 67 00:02:40,508 --> 00:02:42,204 What are you doing here? 68 00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:44,728 Don'’t you mean, who is he doing here? 69 00:02:49,778 --> 00:02:51,214 Wait--wait a minute. 70 00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:53,303 You mean to say that you and Elka have been-- 71 00:02:53,347 --> 00:02:56,393 and you didn'’t think to mention this? 72 00:02:56,437 --> 00:02:59,656 We were doing some unmentionable things. 73 00:02:59,701 --> 00:03:01,790 [Victoria] Oh, God. 74 00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:05,794 I'’ve also been seducing Elka with my culinary skills. 75 00:03:05,837 --> 00:03:07,796 Anyone else for Eggs a la Alex? 76 00:03:07,839 --> 00:03:09,232 No, thanks. 77 00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,016 Just the thought of you and Elka 78 00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:14,063 has replaced Joy'’s extra toe as my appetite suppressant. 79 00:03:17,284 --> 00:03:20,374 Then, my darling, we shall just feast alone. 80 00:03:20,417 --> 00:03:21,940 - Mwah. - Oh, I can'’t wait. 81 00:03:24,900 --> 00:03:25,988 I'’ve gotta dump your dad. 82 00:03:31,602 --> 00:03:34,214 [upbeat music] 83 00:03:34,257 --> 00:03:36,433 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba 84 00:03:36,477 --> 00:03:39,523 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba 85 00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:41,308 ♪ Hey! 86 00:03:41,351 --> 00:03:43,397 Doctor said she'’d be up and on her feet by the end of the day. 87 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:47,139 Oh, so she won'’t need all these painkillers, right? 88 00:03:47,183 --> 00:03:49,490 I may need some to deal with my father. 89 00:03:49,533 --> 00:03:52,275 Has Elka gotten around to breaking up with him yet? 90 00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:53,711 Well, she was going to. 91 00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:55,539 But then she tasted his sweet-and-sour meatballs. 92 00:03:58,325 --> 00:04:01,850 Oh, can you believe our sweet little Joy is moving on? 93 00:04:01,893 --> 00:04:03,199 Oh, we have had some good times together. 94 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:04,722 [sighs] 95 00:04:04,766 --> 00:04:07,682 It is gonna be so sad walking past this empty room. 96 00:04:07,725 --> 00:04:09,597 No, Victoria. 97 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:11,728 We swore that we would tamp down our sadness for Joy'’s sake. 98 00:04:11,773 --> 00:04:13,775 No, you'’re right. 99 00:04:13,818 --> 00:04:17,692 We just have to act as if we'’re happy that she'’s leaving us. 100 00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:18,997 Oh, hey, you. 101 00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:20,172 Are you awake? 102 00:04:20,216 --> 00:04:21,261 What are you talking about? 103 00:04:21,303 --> 00:04:22,566 Oh, nothing. 104 00:04:22,610 --> 00:04:24,264 We were just talking about how excited we are 105 00:04:24,307 --> 00:04:25,613 that you'’re getting married. 106 00:04:25,656 --> 00:04:27,310 Yes, and how exciting it'’s gonna be 107 00:04:27,354 --> 00:04:29,181 to have an extra room in the house. 108 00:04:29,225 --> 00:04:30,835 Good point, Victoria. Ooh! 109 00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:32,272 What shall we do with this room? 110 00:04:32,315 --> 00:04:34,665 Well, we have talked about starting an extra shoe room. 111 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:35,405 That'’s a great idea. 112 00:04:35,449 --> 00:04:36,841 Yes. 113 00:04:36,885 --> 00:04:38,713 See, Joy, great news for everybody. 114 00:04:38,756 --> 00:04:42,499 Ah. There'’s our little patient. 115 00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:44,022 So how are you feeling? 116 00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:46,547 Good. Where have you two been? 117 00:04:46,590 --> 00:04:48,244 I took your mom to the import store 118 00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:49,854 so she could buy you some Marmite. 119 00:04:49,898 --> 00:04:51,334 Marmite? 120 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:54,076 It'’s a healthful yeast by-product. 121 00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:55,382 Rejoyla loves it. 122 00:04:55,425 --> 00:04:57,079 No, I don'’t really like it. 123 00:04:57,122 --> 00:04:59,821 You don'’t know what you like. 124 00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:01,301 Why are you still in bed? 125 00:05:01,344 --> 00:05:03,259 Well, the procedure was just a few hours ago. 126 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,565 The doctor said she should rest. 127 00:05:04,608 --> 00:05:06,131 Oh, rubbish. 128 00:05:06,175 --> 00:05:08,090 When I got rid of my sixth toe, 129 00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:10,353 I simply wrapped a rubber band around it 130 00:05:10,397 --> 00:05:12,050 until it fell off like a lamb'’s tail. 131 00:05:15,489 --> 00:05:17,578 I may never eat. 132 00:05:17,621 --> 00:05:19,580 Why don'’t we give Joy and Bob a few minutes alone? 133 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,019 Thank you for taking care of my mother. 134 00:05:24,062 --> 00:05:25,368 I enjoy her. 135 00:05:25,412 --> 00:05:28,110 My Canadian politeness is the perfect foil 136 00:05:28,153 --> 00:05:29,546 for her British imperiousness. 137 00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:31,331 We British aren'’t imperious. 138 00:05:31,374 --> 00:05:34,899 And I'’m too Canadian to disagree. 139 00:05:34,943 --> 00:05:37,685 Well, my advice to you is to compliment her and feed her gin, 140 00:05:37,728 --> 00:05:39,382 and everything should go well. 141 00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:42,298 Oh, I'’m so happy I have you to deal with her. 142 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,822 Well, then why do you lookso sad? 143 00:05:44,866 --> 00:05:47,956 Melanie and Victoria don'’t seem too upset that I'’m moving out. 144 00:05:47,999 --> 00:05:51,089 In fact, they seem excited to be taking over my room. 145 00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:52,482 Well, that'’s good, Joy. 146 00:05:52,526 --> 00:05:54,049 The last thing you want is for people to be sad. 147 00:05:54,092 --> 00:05:56,181 I suppose you'’re right. 148 00:05:56,225 --> 00:05:58,532 In fact, move in with me right now. 149 00:05:58,575 --> 00:06:00,403 Rip the Band-Aid off fast. 150 00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:02,187 You know, when I moved out of my parents'’ place, 151 00:06:02,231 --> 00:06:04,451 I did it swiftly so there would be no hard feelings. 152 00:06:04,494 --> 00:06:07,062 You were 34. 153 00:06:07,105 --> 00:06:09,369 33 1/2. Don'’t make me seem like loser. 154 00:06:18,682 --> 00:06:21,381 Alex, we need to talk. 155 00:06:21,424 --> 00:06:22,556 One moment. 156 00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:23,905 I'’m gonna check on my baby backs. 157 00:06:30,955 --> 00:06:34,219 Are those hickory-smoked? 158 00:06:34,263 --> 00:06:36,221 You know your ribs. 159 00:06:36,265 --> 00:06:39,964 Of course, it takes a great rack to know one. 160 00:06:40,008 --> 00:06:41,183 Now, what did you want to tell me? 161 00:06:41,226 --> 00:06:42,750 Oh, it can wait. 162 00:06:46,101 --> 00:06:50,671 Is it such a burden for Joy to wear the Scroggs family veil? 163 00:06:50,714 --> 00:06:55,240 Yes, it smells of camphor and lacerates the skin. 164 00:06:55,284 --> 00:06:59,810 But marriage isn'’t meant to smell nice or feel good. 165 00:06:59,854 --> 00:07:04,249 Important words to hear on the verge of my wedding. 166 00:07:04,293 --> 00:07:05,425 Thank you. 167 00:07:05,468 --> 00:07:07,949 It'’s so nice to feel appreciated. 168 00:07:09,820 --> 00:07:13,345 I think perhaps what I'’m really upset about is 169 00:07:13,389 --> 00:07:15,652 that Joy hasn'’t apologized to me yet. 170 00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:17,045 For what? 171 00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:20,222 That she'’s getting married in France. 172 00:07:20,265 --> 00:07:22,485 And? 173 00:07:22,529 --> 00:07:26,141 She knows perfectly well that Daniel, my ex, 174 00:07:26,184 --> 00:07:30,101 broke up with me in a French restaurant. 175 00:07:30,145 --> 00:07:34,497 Well, let me apologize for both of us and for Daniel. 176 00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:36,717 I'’m ashamed of my sex, knowing there'’s a man out there 177 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:38,719 who gave up such a gorgeous woman. 178 00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:41,504 Oh, Bob. 179 00:07:41,548 --> 00:07:44,464 Something so charming about a man apologizing. 180 00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:47,554 They say when you'’re with a woman, 181 00:07:47,597 --> 00:07:49,033 you should look at her mother if you want 182 00:07:49,077 --> 00:07:50,382 to know what lies ahead. 183 00:07:50,426 --> 00:07:52,863 And when I look at you, 184 00:07:52,907 --> 00:07:55,953 I see my future in your eyes. 185 00:07:55,997 --> 00:07:57,215 And I like what I see. 186 00:07:59,087 --> 00:08:00,958 You are a flatterer. 187 00:08:01,002 --> 00:08:03,004 Oh, it'’s not flattery if it'’s true. 188 00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:08,270 Hey, why don'’t I get us another round of these gin martinis? 189 00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:12,622 Oh, you'’ve got an eyelash there. Let me get that. 190 00:08:19,977 --> 00:08:22,153 So, Daddy, about you and Elka. 191 00:08:22,197 --> 00:08:25,200 Oh, she'’s a real tomato. 192 00:08:25,243 --> 00:08:27,158 And speaking of tomatoes, 193 00:08:27,202 --> 00:08:30,771 I was thinking of preparing my special three-day chili for her. 194 00:08:30,814 --> 00:08:32,207 Three days? 195 00:08:32,250 --> 00:08:35,036 That'’s sounds like a pretty big commitment. 196 00:08:35,078 --> 00:08:37,995 How long does a sandwich take? 197 00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:41,129 Victoria, I was hoping to speak with--oh, hello. 198 00:08:41,172 --> 00:08:42,304 Hello. 199 00:08:42,347 --> 00:08:43,434 Alex Chase: 200 00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:45,786 Victoria'’s father, Elka's lover. 201 00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:47,352 Philipa Scroggs: 202 00:08:47,396 --> 00:08:52,096 Joy'’s mother and recipient of too much information. 203 00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:55,491 Nothing sweeter than the musical lilt of an English accent. 204 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,753 Would you like to join us for dinner? 205 00:08:56,797 --> 00:08:58,407 I'’ve got some ribs warming in the oven. 206 00:08:58,450 --> 00:08:59,408 No, thank you. 207 00:08:59,451 --> 00:09:01,366 I prefer my meat the English way, 208 00:09:01,410 --> 00:09:03,107 with the color boiled out of it. 209 00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:04,413 Ah. 210 00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:05,719 Ladies, excuse me. 211 00:09:07,634 --> 00:09:08,896 Oh, I feel terrible. 212 00:09:08,939 --> 00:09:10,288 Oh, don'’t worry about Daddy. 213 00:09:10,332 --> 00:09:11,768 He takes everything as a compliment. 214 00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:13,422 It'’s a Chase family trait. 215 00:09:13,465 --> 00:09:15,424 No, not him. 216 00:09:15,467 --> 00:09:17,426 There'’s something weighing on my heart, 217 00:09:17,469 --> 00:09:19,210 and I need to tell someone. 218 00:09:19,254 --> 00:09:20,472 Oh, of course, Philipa. 219 00:09:20,516 --> 00:09:22,257 What is it? 220 00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:23,911 I think I'’m in love Bob. 221 00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:33,921 You'’re in love with Bob, your daughter'’s fiancé? 222 00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:36,010 Oh, it'’s so wrong. 223 00:09:36,053 --> 00:09:37,315 I just can'’t help myself. 224 00:09:37,359 --> 00:09:39,274 All right. 225 00:09:39,317 --> 00:09:41,711 I won'’t tell anyone about this and neither should you. 226 00:09:41,755 --> 00:09:44,627 You just have to tamp down your feelings. 227 00:09:44,671 --> 00:09:47,630 And you can hide them by being extra nice to Joy. 228 00:09:47,674 --> 00:09:50,328 "Be extra nice to Joy." Uh-hmm. 229 00:09:50,372 --> 00:09:53,984 It'’s odd on the tongue. 230 00:09:54,028 --> 00:09:56,639 Yes, I do owe her that much. 231 00:09:56,683 --> 00:10:00,817 Oh, why is so hard to be a mother? 232 00:10:00,861 --> 00:10:03,515 I used to ask my children'’s nannies the same thing. 233 00:10:07,563 --> 00:10:08,738 What'’s this? What'’s going on? 234 00:10:08,782 --> 00:10:10,566 Bob packed up my stuff. 235 00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:11,872 I decided to move in with him early. 236 00:10:11,915 --> 00:10:13,134 What? 237 00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,918 I mean, that'’s great news. 238 00:10:14,962 --> 00:10:16,659 We just thought that you weren'’t gonna do that 239 00:10:16,703 --> 00:10:18,052 until after the wedding. 240 00:10:18,095 --> 00:10:21,316 I wasn'’t, but why drag it out, right? 241 00:10:21,359 --> 00:10:24,580 So I'’ll leave, and you can get started on turning my room 242 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:25,581 into your shoe room. 243 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,061 That'’s true. 244 00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:28,540 We can get started right away on the shoe room. 245 00:10:28,584 --> 00:10:29,846 Yes, let'’s get started on the shoe room. 246 00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:31,718 And what a lovely shoe room this will be. 247 00:10:31,761 --> 00:10:32,719 She'’s gone. 248 00:10:32,762 --> 00:10:35,809 You can stop saying "shoe room." 249 00:10:35,852 --> 00:10:37,332 Although, congratulations to us. 250 00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:39,247 That was some pretty good tamping down of our feelings. 251 00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:41,075 Speaking of tamping down, 252 00:10:41,118 --> 00:10:42,206 I'’m tamping down the urge to tell you something 253 00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:43,991 I promised I wouldn'’t tellanyone. 254 00:10:44,034 --> 00:10:45,949 Victoria, we'’ve been friends for over 30 years. 255 00:10:45,993 --> 00:10:47,385 We both know how this ends. 256 00:10:47,429 --> 00:10:48,648 All right, I'’ll tell you. 257 00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:51,781 Philipa has fallen in love with Bob. 258 00:10:51,825 --> 00:10:53,043 What? 259 00:10:53,087 --> 00:10:54,218 Oh, my God. 260 00:10:54,262 --> 00:10:55,306 How long have you been tamping that down? 261 00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:58,135 15 whole minutes. 262 00:10:58,179 --> 00:11:00,703 Look, now, she'’s not gonna act on this. 263 00:11:00,747 --> 00:11:03,401 And the most important thing is that Joy never finds out. 264 00:11:03,445 --> 00:11:06,187 We have to make this the happiest time of her life. 265 00:11:06,230 --> 00:11:07,492 Even though she doesn'’t seem to care 266 00:11:07,536 --> 00:11:08,711 about our feelings very much. 267 00:11:08,755 --> 00:11:10,017 I know. 268 00:11:10,060 --> 00:11:11,758 It'’s like she cut off her sixth toe, 269 00:11:11,801 --> 00:11:15,718 and now she can'’t stop walking away. 270 00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:17,546 Maybe that toe was where her heart was. 271 00:11:23,595 --> 00:11:28,165 Oh, Rejoyla, a day'’s bed rest has done you the world of good. 272 00:11:28,209 --> 00:11:31,386 You look two to three years younger. 273 00:11:31,429 --> 00:11:33,344 Thank you, Mother. 274 00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:35,129 Here, let me take that box for you, darling, put it in the car. 275 00:11:35,172 --> 00:11:37,218 You rest. 276 00:11:37,261 --> 00:11:40,482 Oh, and by the way, if you don'’t want to wear the family veil, 277 00:11:40,525 --> 00:11:41,701 that'’s quite all right. 278 00:11:46,444 --> 00:11:49,056 Bob, you'’re amazing. 279 00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:51,798 Well, I guess somebody heard I did eight push-ups 280 00:11:51,841 --> 00:11:54,626 at the gym today. 281 00:11:54,670 --> 00:11:55,627 No. 282 00:11:55,671 --> 00:11:56,759 I'’m talking about my mother. 283 00:11:56,803 --> 00:11:58,326 She'’s never been so sweet. 284 00:11:58,369 --> 00:11:59,675 Whatever you'’re doing, keep it up. 285 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:02,156 In fact, double down and do more. 286 00:12:02,199 --> 00:12:03,374 Don'’t you worry, Joy. 287 00:12:03,418 --> 00:12:05,028 Tell your mother to tighten her suspenders. 288 00:12:05,072 --> 00:12:06,900 I'’m about to charm her pants off. 289 00:12:09,293 --> 00:12:11,861 [crickets chirping] 290 00:12:11,905 --> 00:12:13,994 You complete me. 291 00:12:14,037 --> 00:12:15,430 Really? 292 00:12:15,473 --> 00:12:17,693 Sorry. I was talking to the ribs. 293 00:12:19,173 --> 00:12:21,088 Fair enough. 294 00:12:24,656 --> 00:12:27,921 Look, Alex, this isn'’t gonna work. 295 00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:30,271 I knew it. 296 00:12:30,314 --> 00:12:32,403 It was inevitable, I suppose. 297 00:12:32,447 --> 00:12:35,189 But it was a wild ride, you and me. 298 00:12:35,232 --> 00:12:38,932 Me hanging onto to bronc, waiting for that bell to ring. 299 00:12:38,975 --> 00:12:42,196 And my lasso, she could only keep you tied up so long. 300 00:12:46,330 --> 00:12:47,505 [Alex] Elka? 301 00:12:47,549 --> 00:12:49,899 Elka? 302 00:12:49,943 --> 00:12:51,422 Oh, sorry. 303 00:12:51,466 --> 00:12:52,728 Meat coma. 304 00:12:55,862 --> 00:12:58,647 Well, an actor knows when it'’s time to make a solitary exit. 305 00:13:00,910 --> 00:13:03,478 I'’ll never find another woman like you, Elka. 306 00:13:03,521 --> 00:13:06,263 That'’s true. 307 00:13:06,307 --> 00:13:08,570 On the other hand, what do you think of Philipa? 308 00:13:11,965 --> 00:13:13,618 Oh, my God, Bob. 309 00:13:13,662 --> 00:13:15,272 I haven'’t moved out my stuff, 310 00:13:15,316 --> 00:13:17,144 and they'’ve already turned it into their shoe room. 311 00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,189 They'’re not sad I'’m leaving at all. 312 00:13:19,233 --> 00:13:22,323 Maybe they'’re just jealous that you'’re marrying me. 313 00:13:22,366 --> 00:13:23,890 [chuckling] Oh, Bob. 314 00:13:23,933 --> 00:13:25,413 That'’s what I love about you. 315 00:13:25,456 --> 00:13:27,023 You always make me laugh. 316 00:13:27,067 --> 00:13:29,721 Right. 317 00:13:29,765 --> 00:13:31,419 So how'’s it going with my mum? 318 00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:32,942 She'’s not here yet. 319 00:13:32,986 --> 00:13:34,944 Well, find out how long she'’s staying. 320 00:13:34,988 --> 00:13:36,337 If it'’s gonna be more than a week, 321 00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:38,295 see if you can entice her into going to a hotel. 322 00:13:38,339 --> 00:13:39,383 I'’ll do my best. 323 00:13:39,427 --> 00:13:40,428 Oh, here she is. 324 00:13:40,471 --> 00:13:42,473 Wish me luck. 325 00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:44,867 Philipa, a vision as always. 326 00:13:44,911 --> 00:13:46,869 Thank you for joining me for lunch. 327 00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:49,045 I won'’t be staying long. 328 00:13:49,089 --> 00:13:50,438 Well, then I will cherish the moments 329 00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:51,569 that we do have together. 330 00:13:51,613 --> 00:13:53,354 In fact, I was wondering, 331 00:13:53,397 --> 00:13:56,444 how much more time will we have you here in Cleveland? 332 00:13:56,487 --> 00:13:57,837 Till the wedding, of course. 333 00:13:57,880 --> 00:13:59,360 No. 334 00:13:59,403 --> 00:14:03,016 Only four more brief weeks? 335 00:14:03,059 --> 00:14:04,365 Well, then I'’m gonna suggest 336 00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:07,542 something old and unconventional. 337 00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:11,807 How would you feel about checking into a hotel? 338 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:14,201 Really? 339 00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:16,899 A hotel? 340 00:14:16,943 --> 00:14:20,947 I think it might make everything easier. 341 00:14:20,990 --> 00:14:22,600 What do you think? 342 00:14:22,644 --> 00:14:25,952 Are you saying what I think you'’re saying? 343 00:14:25,995 --> 00:14:30,347 I'’m saying I want to see you in the best hotel room in town. 344 00:14:30,391 --> 00:14:34,351 Room service, champagne, whatever your heart desires. 345 00:14:34,395 --> 00:14:36,179 What about Joy? 346 00:14:36,223 --> 00:14:38,399 Oh, she'’ll be a little sad at first. 347 00:14:38,442 --> 00:14:40,836 But I'’m sure she'll come around to accepting it. 348 00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:44,274 More than anything, she wants you to be happy, as do I. 349 00:14:44,318 --> 00:14:45,536 Oh. 350 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:47,930 This is all so overwhelming. 351 00:14:47,974 --> 00:14:50,802 I felt foolish having feelingsfor you. 352 00:14:50,846 --> 00:14:51,847 Feelings? 353 00:14:54,154 --> 00:14:56,373 Now I know that you share those feelings, 354 00:14:56,417 --> 00:14:58,158 I'’m over the moon. 355 00:14:58,201 --> 00:15:00,160 But... 356 00:15:00,203 --> 00:15:02,118 It will be difficult dealing with Rejoyla. 357 00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:05,861 But let'’s not worry about that now. 358 00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:09,909 Oh, Bob, you make me feel so alive. 359 00:15:11,258 --> 00:15:13,303 I'’m going to pick up something disgraceful 360 00:15:13,347 --> 00:15:14,783 at Victoria'’s Secret. 361 00:15:31,017 --> 00:15:32,714 Joy, do you need any help in there? 362 00:15:32,757 --> 00:15:34,368 No, no. I can do it myself. 363 00:15:34,411 --> 00:15:36,631 By herself. 364 00:15:36,674 --> 00:15:38,676 Well, I guess she doesn'’t need us at all anymore. 365 00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,722 No, no. Tamp, tamp. 366 00:15:40,765 --> 00:15:43,116 We can feel those feelings but we can'’t say them. 367 00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:46,293 [Joy] I'’m ready. 368 00:15:46,336 --> 00:15:47,337 [Victoria] Aww. 369 00:15:47,381 --> 00:15:48,556 [gasps] Oh. 370 00:15:48,599 --> 00:15:50,384 Oh. 371 00:15:50,427 --> 00:15:52,255 You look beautiful. 372 00:15:52,299 --> 00:15:53,691 I hate you. 373 00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:56,956 What? 374 00:15:56,999 --> 00:15:58,218 I couldn'’t hold it in anymore. 375 00:15:58,261 --> 00:16:00,002 You didn'’t hold it in at all! 376 00:16:00,046 --> 00:16:01,177 And I hate you too. 377 00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,831 Why? 378 00:16:02,874 --> 00:16:05,312 Because you'’re leaving us, and you don'’t care. 379 00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:06,748 I don'’t care? 380 00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:07,967 You'’re the ones who don't care. 381 00:16:08,010 --> 00:16:09,055 You couldn'’t wait for me to go 382 00:16:09,098 --> 00:16:10,447 to make more room for your shoes. 383 00:16:10,491 --> 00:16:11,448 I hate both of you. 384 00:16:11,492 --> 00:16:13,015 But we only acted like that 385 00:16:13,059 --> 00:16:14,582 because you were acting like you couldn'’t care less. 386 00:16:14,625 --> 00:16:17,933 I was tamping down my feelings for your sake. 387 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,762 We were tamping down our feelings for your sake. 388 00:16:20,805 --> 00:16:22,546 We don'’t hate you. We love you. 389 00:16:22,590 --> 00:16:25,419 And you look so beautiful in your dress. 390 00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:27,160 I love you too. 391 00:16:27,203 --> 00:16:29,597 [all crying] 392 00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:30,598 [cell phone pings] 393 00:16:30,641 --> 00:16:31,642 Oh, there'’s your phone. 394 00:16:31,686 --> 00:16:34,471 It'’s your phone. Get it. 395 00:16:34,515 --> 00:16:36,125 Oh, it'’s my mother. 396 00:16:36,169 --> 00:16:37,518 "On my way over. 397 00:16:37,561 --> 00:16:39,476 Have something awkward to discuss." 398 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,478 Oh, my God. 399 00:16:41,522 --> 00:16:44,829 That'’s British for "I'’m about to ruin your life." 400 00:16:44,873 --> 00:16:47,049 Wait, what if she'’s sick? 401 00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:48,659 I can'’t stand her, 402 00:16:48,703 --> 00:16:50,661 but I don'’t want something bad to happen to her. 403 00:16:50,705 --> 00:16:51,923 She'’s in love with Bob. 404 00:16:51,967 --> 00:16:55,623 I'’ll kill the bitch. 405 00:16:55,665 --> 00:16:57,755 [Philipa] Rejoyla, prepare yourself. 406 00:16:57,799 --> 00:16:58,800 I'’m going to make a scene. 407 00:17:01,977 --> 00:17:04,066 Oh, my goodness. 408 00:17:04,109 --> 00:17:06,373 Oh, you look stunning. 409 00:17:06,415 --> 00:17:09,115 You'’re the most beautiful bride I'’ve ever seen. 410 00:17:09,157 --> 00:17:10,768 Thank you. 411 00:17:10,811 --> 00:17:13,728 That'’s a very sweet thing to say. 412 00:17:13,771 --> 00:17:16,599 But I believe you came here to tell me something. 413 00:17:16,644 --> 00:17:18,515 Yes, I did. 414 00:17:18,559 --> 00:17:20,952 But looking at you now, 415 00:17:20,996 --> 00:17:24,781 I realize what I wanted to say is... 416 00:17:24,826 --> 00:17:26,958 I'’m a silly old fool. 417 00:17:27,002 --> 00:17:28,221 What are you talking about? 418 00:17:28,263 --> 00:17:29,918 Oh, I'’ve been in a bad place 419 00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:32,660 ever since Daniel broke up with me. 420 00:17:32,703 --> 00:17:34,531 I'’ve been lonely and vulnerable, 421 00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:37,056 and it'’s led me to some very peculiar behavior. 422 00:17:38,883 --> 00:17:40,059 [Bob] Joy, are you in there? 423 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,364 Bob, you can'’t come in here. 424 00:17:41,408 --> 00:17:42,539 You can'’t see the dress. 425 00:17:42,583 --> 00:17:44,802 [Bob] I'’ll cover my eyes. 426 00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:47,370 Joy, I need to talk to you before your mother gets here. 427 00:17:47,414 --> 00:17:48,110 Hello, Bob. 428 00:17:48,154 --> 00:17:49,590 Ah! 429 00:17:51,679 --> 00:17:53,115 Joy, what did she say to you? 430 00:17:53,159 --> 00:17:55,117 I didn'’t say anything to her. 431 00:17:55,161 --> 00:17:57,946 But I want to say something to you, Bob. 432 00:17:57,989 --> 00:18:00,905 You shouldn'’t love any womanbut Joy. 433 00:18:00,949 --> 00:18:04,692 She'’s strong and brave, and you'’re lucky to marry her. 434 00:18:04,735 --> 00:18:07,303 And if you say or do anything to hurt her, 435 00:18:07,347 --> 00:18:09,871 I'’ll rip off your head and spit down the hole. 436 00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,272 I love Joy. 437 00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:21,012 I'’ll never do anything to hurt her. 438 00:18:21,056 --> 00:18:22,884 See that you don'’t. 439 00:18:22,927 --> 00:18:24,625 Good-bye, Bob. 440 00:18:27,889 --> 00:18:30,979 So, Joy, how much do you know? 441 00:18:31,022 --> 00:18:32,676 I know that my mother fell in love with you 442 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,809 because I made you be extra nice to her. 443 00:18:34,852 --> 00:18:36,941 And nobody can resist your charms 444 00:18:36,985 --> 00:18:38,378 when you'’re turning them on. 445 00:18:38,421 --> 00:18:40,249 Well, that was easy. 446 00:18:40,293 --> 00:18:42,033 I didn'’t think I'd get out of here without a bunch of yelling. 447 00:18:42,077 --> 00:18:44,166 [all yelling at once] 448 00:18:44,210 --> 00:18:45,080 Ah, there it is. 449 00:18:52,957 --> 00:18:54,872 [crickets chirping] 450 00:18:54,916 --> 00:18:57,875 I am so glad you decided not to move out 451 00:18:57,919 --> 00:18:58,876 until after the wedding. 452 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:00,617 Me too. 453 00:19:00,661 --> 00:19:03,751 Now, we can do this the right way: in slow, painful stages. 454 00:19:03,794 --> 00:19:04,752 [chuckles] 455 00:19:04,795 --> 00:19:06,754 Yeah. 456 00:19:06,797 --> 00:19:08,712 I'’m really gonna miss coming in here and just sitting with you. 457 00:19:08,756 --> 00:19:11,933 This room does have a lot of memories. 458 00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:14,849 Especially that bed. 459 00:19:14,892 --> 00:19:16,285 That'’s why I'’m not sitting on it. 460 00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:22,117 And we have decided to keep your room just as it is. 461 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:23,379 You can come back and visit anytime. 462 00:19:25,729 --> 00:19:28,341 Thank you for a lovely visit,Rejoyla. 463 00:19:28,384 --> 00:19:29,646 I'’m returning to London now, 464 00:19:29,690 --> 00:19:32,301 but I shall see you in Paris on the big day. 465 00:19:32,345 --> 00:19:34,521 You'’re leaving so soon? 466 00:19:34,564 --> 00:19:35,870 Can I at least give you a lift to the airport? 467 00:19:35,913 --> 00:19:38,612 She has one. 468 00:19:38,655 --> 00:19:40,440 Daddy, that is so sweet. 469 00:19:40,483 --> 00:19:43,834 Philipa has promised to give me a culinary tour of Britain. 470 00:19:43,878 --> 00:19:45,967 That should only take an hour, 471 00:19:46,010 --> 00:19:48,491 giving us plenty of time for-- how shall I put this? 472 00:19:48,535 --> 00:19:51,146 Sex. 473 00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:54,323 Let'’s go before I change my mind. 474 00:19:54,367 --> 00:19:55,803 - Bye, love. - Bye-bye. 475 00:19:58,284 --> 00:20:01,417 He'’s boorish, and uncouth, and I just might do him on the plane. 476 00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:08,119 Well, I guess that worked out. 477 00:20:10,339 --> 00:20:13,864 So my mum is gonna sleep with your dad. 478 00:20:13,908 --> 00:20:15,953 Well, come to think of it, he also slept with my mom. 479 00:20:15,997 --> 00:20:17,781 And me. 480 00:20:17,825 --> 00:20:18,826 Yeah. 481 00:20:18,869 --> 00:20:20,567 And Joy and I both slept with Bob. 482 00:20:20,610 --> 00:20:23,134 And you and I both slept with Captain LeBeau from the ship. 483 00:20:23,178 --> 00:20:25,093 And Melanie and I both slept with Kyle, 484 00:20:25,136 --> 00:20:26,355 the guy who left at the altar. 485 00:20:26,399 --> 00:20:27,487 And we both slept with Mitch. 486 00:20:27,530 --> 00:20:29,489 And we all slept with Sinatra. 487 00:20:31,404 --> 00:20:33,884 Oh, wait, it was just me. 488 00:20:40,587 --> 00:20:41,762 [upbeat music] 489 00:20:41,805 --> 00:20:44,286 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba 490 00:20:44,330 --> 00:20:46,419 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba 491 00:20:46,462 --> 00:20:51,598 ♪ 492 00:20:51,641 --> 00:20:53,730 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba 493 00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:55,993 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba 494 00:21:04,393 --> 00:21:06,265 ♪ Hey! 35731

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