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1
00:00:02,702 --> 00:00:04,604
Well, dinner
was delicious.
2
00:00:04,636 --> 00:00:06,372
At least what
I had of it.
3
00:00:08,240 --> 00:00:09,574
Cheryl, you
know the rule,
4
00:00:09,608 --> 00:00:11,778
"You talk, don't eat,
it's Jim's meat."
5
00:00:14,512 --> 00:00:16,649
I'm glad we finally got
a chance to meet each other.
6
00:00:16,681 --> 00:00:18,785
Oh, us, too, Talia.
7
00:00:18,818 --> 00:00:21,187
Andy, would you like
a taste of my creme brulee?
8
00:00:21,219 --> 00:00:24,089
Oh, thanks, but I don't
have much of a sweet tooth.
9
00:00:26,492 --> 00:00:27,527
May I?
10
00:00:27,559 --> 00:00:29,227
Huh? What?
11
00:00:29,260 --> 00:00:31,129
(CHUCKLES)
12
00:00:29,260 --> 00:00:31,129
Mmm.
13
00:00:31,163 --> 00:00:33,232
You know, honey,
that looks good. Ow.
14
00:00:35,267 --> 00:00:37,170
Cheryl, you
know the rules.
15
00:00:37,203 --> 00:00:39,506
"It may not be fair,
but I don't share."
16
00:00:40,573 --> 00:00:41,474
That's great, honey.
17
00:00:41,508 --> 00:00:43,510
You should write books
for selfish children.
18
00:00:45,344 --> 00:00:47,313
Yes, uh, excuse me,
good fellow.
19
00:00:47,345 --> 00:00:49,247
Would you mind turning down
the air conditioning?
20
00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:50,549
Milady has a chill.
21
00:00:53,185 --> 00:00:54,520
Aw, thank you.
22
00:00:54,552 --> 00:00:56,254
You know, he never
stops thinking about me.
23
00:00:56,287 --> 00:00:57,389
Aw.
24
00:00:57,423 --> 00:00:59,692
You know, honey,
I'm a little chilled, too.
25
00:00:59,725 --> 00:01:01,628
Well, sit tight.
They're working
on it, honey.
26
00:01:04,563 --> 00:01:06,099
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
27
00:01:07,465 --> 00:01:08,800
Oh! Excuse me
for just a minute.
28
00:01:08,834 --> 00:01:10,368
Oh, allow me.
29
00:01:10,402 --> 00:01:11,736
(CHUCKLES)
30
00:01:11,769 --> 00:01:13,173
TALIA: Thank you.
31
00:01:15,307 --> 00:01:17,210
Talia seems
very sweet.
32
00:01:17,242 --> 00:01:19,745
Hold, hold,
hold on, hold on.
Good, she's gone.
33
00:01:23,182 --> 00:01:24,683
Oh, thank God,
I'm ravenous.
34
00:01:24,716 --> 00:01:26,519
Pass the sugar
packets. Hurry!
35
00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:32,692
Andy!
36
00:01:32,724 --> 00:01:35,560
If you're so hungry,
how come you only
ordered a salad? Oh.
37
00:01:35,593 --> 00:01:37,229
Talia and I just
started dating.
38
00:01:37,263 --> 00:01:38,597
I'm trying to make
a good impression.
39
00:01:41,266 --> 00:01:42,301
JIM: She's coming,
she's coming!
40
00:01:42,334 --> 00:01:44,370
Mayday, mayday,
mayday, mayday!
41
00:01:46,305 --> 00:01:47,340
(ANDY CHUCKLING)
42
00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:49,175
We should get
going if we want
to make that movie.
43
00:01:49,207 --> 00:01:50,376
Mmm-hmm.
44
00:01:52,378 --> 00:01:53,745
Just waiting
on Cheryl.
(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
45
00:01:53,778 --> 00:01:55,414
Done eating
yet, Sis?
46
00:01:55,447 --> 00:01:56,783
I don't know
where she
puts it all.
47
00:01:58,617 --> 00:02:02,422
Well, well, well,
I hope the movie
is as good as dinner.
48
00:02:03,355 --> 00:02:05,391
Thank you.
49
00:02:03,355 --> 00:02:05,391
Oh, my pleasure.
50
00:02:08,193 --> 00:02:10,697
Cheryl, can you try
to be a little more careful?
51
00:02:21,606 --> 00:02:22,908
JIM: Oh, baby.
52
00:02:24,842 --> 00:02:27,179
Hey, how'd it go?
53
00:02:27,212 --> 00:02:28,614
(SHUSHING) Kids asleep.
Kitchen's clean. Don't talk.
Movie's almost over.
54
00:02:31,783 --> 00:02:33,286
Okay, Dana, come on.
Go. Let's go.
55
00:02:33,318 --> 00:02:34,953
Out, out, out, out.
Get out!
56
00:02:33,318 --> 00:02:34,953
In a minute!
57
00:02:34,986 --> 00:02:37,423
No, this is date night.
We talked, I fed her.
58
00:02:37,455 --> 00:02:40,225
Now it's time
for the fun part.
Let's go!
59
00:02:40,258 --> 00:02:41,760
I want to watch
the end of the movie!
60
00:02:41,794 --> 00:02:44,362
Oh, this one?
Boat sinks,
skinny guy dies,
61
00:02:44,395 --> 00:02:46,231
and the old lady throws
a jewel in the ocean.
62
00:02:46,264 --> 00:02:48,466
Come on, scram!
63
00:02:48,500 --> 00:02:50,536
But I got a pizza
coming in five minutes!
64
00:02:50,568 --> 00:02:51,903
Whoo, then I'm going
to have to beat my record.
65
00:02:51,937 --> 00:02:54,174
Come on,
hit the bricks! Go!
66
00:02:57,810 --> 00:03:00,312
All right, woman,
brace yourself.
67
00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:02,549
Your one-man
threesome is here.
68
00:03:09,587 --> 00:03:11,591
What...
What are you doing?
69
00:03:11,623 --> 00:03:13,425
Getting ready for bed.
70
00:03:13,459 --> 00:03:16,695
(STAMMERING)
What's with the sweats?
71
00:03:16,729 --> 00:03:19,732
What happened
to the hot chick
I took to dinner?
72
00:03:19,764 --> 00:03:22,367
That hot chick
is still waiting for you
to pull her chair out.
73
00:03:23,635 --> 00:03:26,639
Oh, Cheryl, come on!
74
00:03:26,671 --> 00:03:27,973
What are you...
75
00:03:26,671 --> 00:03:27,973
No!
76
00:03:28,007 --> 00:03:29,742
What?
77
00:03:28,007 --> 00:03:29,742
Did you see
how much attention
78
00:03:29,775 --> 00:03:30,943
Andy was paying to Talia?
79
00:03:30,975 --> 00:03:33,312
He waited on her
hand and foot.
80
00:03:33,344 --> 00:03:35,413
I couldn't even
get you to pour me
a glass of wine.
81
00:03:35,447 --> 00:03:36,915
Cheryl, you are
a lightweight.
82
00:03:36,949 --> 00:03:39,885
Two glasses of wine,
and your head is flat
into the plate.
83
00:03:39,918 --> 00:03:41,554
Well...
84
00:03:41,586 --> 00:03:43,989
Besides, how am I going
to have fun if you don't
drive home?
85
00:03:45,591 --> 00:03:46,826
Jim, I'm serious.
86
00:03:46,859 --> 00:03:48,594
I'm serious, too.
87
00:03:48,627 --> 00:03:51,963
You used to come home
and stay all dressed up
in your sexy dress.
88
00:03:51,997 --> 00:03:53,633
Well, you used
to pull my chair out
89
00:03:53,665 --> 00:03:54,766
and share your
dessert with me.
90
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,503
You know, like Andy
was doing for Talia?
91
00:03:57,536 --> 00:04:01,439
Cheryl, Talia is making
an effort for her man,
92
00:04:01,473 --> 00:04:02,875
and you...
93
00:04:02,907 --> 00:04:04,009
What?
94
00:04:04,909 --> 00:04:06,246
Don't.
95
00:04:07,913 --> 00:04:09,882
That is not true.
I make an effort.
96
00:04:09,914 --> 00:04:12,618
You saw me in
that dress tonight.
I was bringing it!
97
00:04:15,420 --> 00:04:17,257
Why didn't you bring
it into the bedroom?
98
00:04:18,624 --> 00:04:20,660
Come on, Cheryl.
Were you trying
to impress me,
99
00:04:20,692 --> 00:04:22,327
or were you
trying to impress,
100
00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:23,995
you know, Andy's
new girlfriend?
101
00:04:24,028 --> 00:04:26,399
We were going out.
I wanted to look nice.
102
00:04:26,432 --> 00:04:29,636
Uh-huh. Did you
shave your legs
to the knee, or past?
103
00:04:31,737 --> 00:04:33,606
Wait! My thighs
didn't show!
104
00:04:33,639 --> 00:04:35,608
Ah!
105
00:04:35,641 --> 00:04:37,376
You weren't making
an effort for me.
106
00:04:37,408 --> 00:04:39,611
You know what? And you
hardly ever do anymore.
107
00:04:39,644 --> 00:04:42,347
Jim, it's a little
difficult to make an
effort all the time
108
00:04:42,380 --> 00:04:44,015
when you're trying
to be a mother
to three kids.
109
00:04:44,048 --> 00:04:47,485
Cheryl, you know what?
There you go using
the mommy card again.
110
00:04:47,519 --> 00:04:48,954
You know what? It didn't
work on Mother's Day,
111
00:04:48,987 --> 00:04:50,656
it's not going to work now.
112
00:04:50,689 --> 00:04:52,725
You know, Jim,
you should talk.
113
00:04:52,757 --> 00:04:55,327
Andy was pretending
to eat salads
to impress his date.
114
00:04:55,360 --> 00:04:57,529
What effort do you
put forth for me?
115
00:04:57,562 --> 00:04:59,932
Baby, I am
nothing but effort.
116
00:05:05,103 --> 00:05:06,673
You see that?
117
00:05:08,374 --> 00:05:11,744
I trapped it in the bathroom.
Most men wouldn't do that.
118
00:05:19,918 --> 00:05:21,653
All right, Dana,
I need your opinion
about something.
119
00:05:21,687 --> 00:05:23,055
What?
120
00:05:23,088 --> 00:05:24,824
Jim thinks
I'm not putting
in enough effort.
121
00:05:24,857 --> 00:05:25,925
Into what?
122
00:05:25,958 --> 00:05:27,493
Like, you know,
dressing up,
123
00:05:27,526 --> 00:05:28,860
being romantic,
looking my best.
124
00:05:28,894 --> 00:05:30,629
Oh, you got to be
freaking kidding me.
125
00:05:30,661 --> 00:05:32,664
The guy picks
his teeth with
his keys.
126
00:05:33,865 --> 00:05:35,735
Yes! Right!
127
00:05:35,767 --> 00:05:38,370
So, so I like
being comfortable.
What's the big deal?
128
00:05:38,403 --> 00:05:41,439
Nothing. I thought
the whole point of marriage
was being comfortable.
129
00:05:41,473 --> 00:05:43,074
Once you bag a man
and get his head
on the wall,
130
00:05:43,108 --> 00:05:46,079
you never have to worry
about the sting of wire
and spandex again.
131
00:05:47,178 --> 00:05:49,114
Yes, exactly!
132
00:05:49,148 --> 00:05:50,950
These are your
coasting years.
133
00:05:50,983 --> 00:05:52,084
Yes!
134
00:05:52,117 --> 00:05:55,121
No, no, no, no, no.
135
00:05:55,153 --> 00:05:57,423
I'm not coasting.
136
00:05:57,456 --> 00:05:58,891
Really?
137
00:05:57,456 --> 00:05:58,891
Yeah.
138
00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:01,092
So, are those your fancy
on-the-town sweats
139
00:06:01,125 --> 00:06:02,861
or your teatime
with the queen sweats?
140
00:06:05,163 --> 00:06:06,598
I like my sweats.
141
00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:08,834
Well, I know.
That's why
you wear them
142
00:06:08,867 --> 00:06:10,603
every single day.
143
00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:13,172
Oh, man.
144
00:06:13,204 --> 00:06:14,606
I'm coasting.
145
00:06:14,639 --> 00:06:17,976
Ah, don't worry about it.
Forty, fifty years, it'll all
be over anyway.
146
00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:21,413
All right,
I got to go.
I have a date.
147
00:06:21,447 --> 00:06:22,982
Check out my fake laugh.
148
00:06:23,014 --> 00:06:24,983
"That is so funny!"
149
00:06:31,023 --> 00:06:32,158
All right.
150
00:06:32,190 --> 00:06:34,859
One hour left
to the big
boxing match!
151
00:06:34,892 --> 00:06:36,194
How great is this, huh?
152
00:06:36,228 --> 00:06:38,497
Saturday night,
two buds watching
153
00:06:38,529 --> 00:06:41,500
the pay-per-view
boxing event
of the season.
154
00:06:41,533 --> 00:06:43,468
Yes!
155
00:06:41,533 --> 00:06:43,468
(CHUCKLES)
156
00:06:43,502 --> 00:06:46,105
Now, Talia's okay with this,
leaving her alone?
157
00:06:46,137 --> 00:06:48,606
I got a little static,
but I checked her.
158
00:06:48,639 --> 00:06:49,641
Mmm-hmm.
159
00:06:50,942 --> 00:06:52,076
She dumped you,
didn't she?
160
00:06:52,110 --> 00:06:53,713
Like a gay running mate.
161
00:06:55,547 --> 00:06:57,917
She caught me at 2:00 a.m.
sitting on the kitchen floor
162
00:06:57,949 --> 00:07:00,118
dipping a stick
of butter into
a sugar bowl.
163
00:07:01,987 --> 00:07:03,022
You eat that?
164
00:07:03,055 --> 00:07:04,189
Yeah.
165
00:07:04,223 --> 00:07:05,658
That's brilliant!
166
00:07:06,057 --> 00:07:07,125
Yeah!
167
00:07:07,158 --> 00:07:09,995
I can't believe...
168
00:07:07,158 --> 00:07:09,995
Surprise!
169
00:07:13,531 --> 00:07:15,033
Wow!
170
00:07:15,067 --> 00:07:18,069
Look at you.
My God, what
are you doing?
171
00:07:18,103 --> 00:07:20,706
I know what
this is about.
172
00:07:20,738 --> 00:07:22,640
Twenty years ago
this very night,
173
00:07:22,673 --> 00:07:25,210
I won the district
spelling bee.
174
00:07:25,244 --> 00:07:27,179
(LAUGHS)
175
00:07:27,211 --> 00:07:30,014
Sis, you remembered.
176
00:07:30,048 --> 00:07:31,783
I'm flabbergasted.
177
00:07:31,817 --> 00:07:34,821
F-L-A-B-B-E-R-G-A-S-T-E-D,
flabbergasted.
178
00:07:36,555 --> 00:07:38,023
Still got it.
179
00:07:36,555 --> 00:07:38,023
You still got it.
180
00:07:38,055 --> 00:07:40,526
No, Cheryl, really,
what's going on?
181
00:07:40,559 --> 00:07:42,962
Well, I mean,
I heard what you
said the other night,
182
00:07:42,995 --> 00:07:44,596
and I think maybe
you're right.
183
00:07:44,629 --> 00:07:47,533
I mean, maybe we both could
make a little more effort,
184
00:07:47,565 --> 00:07:49,968
so I decided
I would start.
185
00:07:50,802 --> 00:07:51,971
Tonight?
186
00:07:52,870 --> 00:07:54,673
Yeah.
187
00:07:54,706 --> 00:07:57,209
And I got Dana
to watch the kids,
188
00:07:57,242 --> 00:07:59,545
so we have the whole
house to ourselves.
189
00:07:59,577 --> 00:08:01,679
Oh, but we
were going to...
190
00:08:01,713 --> 00:08:04,550
Do nothing.
Nothing tonight.
191
00:08:04,583 --> 00:08:07,953
Because my lovely wife
went out of her way
192
00:08:07,985 --> 00:08:09,822
to create
a romantic dinner.
193
00:08:11,689 --> 00:08:13,158
I'm going to go
get the salad.
194
00:08:13,190 --> 00:08:15,693
Okay. And I'm going
to take this trash
to the curb
195
00:08:15,726 --> 00:08:17,096
so we can have
a romantic evening.
196
00:08:18,829 --> 00:08:21,099
What about
the fight?
197
00:08:18,829 --> 00:08:21,099
Listen,
198
00:08:21,132 --> 00:08:23,835
I made such a big stink
about her not making
an effort,
199
00:08:23,869 --> 00:08:25,538
if I blow her off now,
200
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:27,940
she won't wear that
sexy dress again
until my funeral.
201
00:08:29,608 --> 00:08:30,975
Jim, we got
to see the fight.
202
00:08:31,009 --> 00:08:32,677
We paid 75 bucks for it.
203
00:08:32,711 --> 00:08:33,879
I know, I know,
I know, I know.
204
00:08:33,912 --> 00:08:36,048
Let me think
for a second.
205
00:08:36,081 --> 00:08:38,716
I need some
thinking music.
206
00:08:38,750 --> 00:08:40,152
Hum something.
207
00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:44,190
(HUMMING SWING LOW
SWEET CHARIOT)
208
00:08:52,663 --> 00:08:54,165
(BOTH HUMMING)
209
00:08:56,067 --> 00:08:57,769
(MUFFLED SINGING)
210
00:09:06,677 --> 00:09:09,114
I got it! I got it!
211
00:09:09,147 --> 00:09:11,917
Look, she's making
a romantic dinner, right?
212
00:09:11,950 --> 00:09:14,286
That'll take
about 45 minutes.
213
00:09:14,318 --> 00:09:16,721
A half an hour
if I don't chew.
214
00:09:17,655 --> 00:09:19,324
So, you go home.
215
00:09:19,357 --> 00:09:21,159
I'll eat really
fast, finish up.
216
00:09:21,192 --> 00:09:22,727
I'll call you
when we're done.
217
00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:24,362
Good. Okay. Yeah.
That'll give me a chance
218
00:09:24,395 --> 00:09:26,064
to make some of those
butter sugar things.
219
00:09:26,932 --> 00:09:28,801
You know what?
220
00:09:28,833 --> 00:09:30,034
Andy, you should really
come up with a name
for those.
221
00:09:30,067 --> 00:09:32,270
I did. They're
called Shame Sticks.
222
00:09:35,774 --> 00:09:37,909
Here we go.
223
00:09:35,774 --> 00:09:37,909
Oh, yes.
224
00:09:37,942 --> 00:09:39,010
Isn't this fun?
225
00:09:39,043 --> 00:09:41,646
Oh, yes,
really fun,
really fun.
226
00:09:42,913 --> 00:09:44,917
(GASPS)
Where's my manners?
227
00:09:44,950 --> 00:09:47,219
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
228
00:09:47,251 --> 00:09:49,253
Well, thank you, sir.
229
00:09:47,251 --> 00:09:49,253
Go ahead and sit.
230
00:09:49,287 --> 00:09:50,956
Okay, thank you.
Whoa. (LAUGHS)
231
00:09:53,191 --> 00:09:54,893
Now, honey...
232
00:09:54,926 --> 00:09:57,062
Did you notice I'm wearing
your favorite dress?
233
00:09:57,095 --> 00:09:59,632
Mmm-hmm, it's beautiful,
it's beautiful, beautiful,
beautiful.
234
00:10:01,099 --> 00:10:04,670
Slow down! Slow down,
I want to enjoy tonight.
235
00:10:04,702 --> 00:10:08,206
I thought maybe
after dinner, we'd take
a midnight stroll in the park.
236
00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:10,842
Are you nuts?
The park at night?
237
00:10:10,875 --> 00:10:12,644
It's crawling
with he-shes.
238
00:10:14,379 --> 00:10:15,813
Really?
239
00:10:15,846 --> 00:10:18,983
No, I'm going to lie
to you, Cheryl.
240
00:10:19,017 --> 00:10:23,122
Okay, well, we'll have
a romantic evening at home.
241
00:10:24,022 --> 00:10:25,824
To making an effort.
242
00:10:25,856 --> 00:10:26,958
Okay.
243
00:10:29,827 --> 00:10:31,262
Whoo! Boy, I better
eat something,
244
00:10:31,296 --> 00:10:33,299
or this wine is going
to knock me out.
245
00:10:40,072 --> 00:10:42,674
Wait a minute,
wait a minute, wait.
Before you eat...
246
00:10:43,875 --> 00:10:45,177
I'd like to make a toast.
247
00:10:48,379 --> 00:10:51,250
To my young,
beautiful wife,
248
00:10:51,283 --> 00:10:53,686
who has given me
not only tonight,
249
00:10:53,719 --> 00:10:54,820
but for the last...
250
00:10:55,419 --> 00:10:56,688
Thirteen?
251
00:10:55,419 --> 00:10:56,688
Yeah.
252
00:10:58,289 --> 00:11:01,459
...thirteen years,
a wonderful life.
253
00:11:01,493 --> 00:11:03,395
Oh, that is so sweet.
254
00:11:03,427 --> 00:11:04,897
I'm a sweet guy.
255
00:11:07,164 --> 00:11:09,168
Mmm! Cheryl,
must I remind you
256
00:11:09,201 --> 00:11:11,003
of the old
country tradition
257
00:11:11,035 --> 00:11:13,338
of finishing
your drink when
a man makes a toast?
258
00:11:14,172 --> 00:11:15,173
Oh.
259
00:11:20,479 --> 00:11:21,780
Whoo!
260
00:11:21,812 --> 00:11:23,314
Whoa!
261
00:11:21,812 --> 00:11:23,314
Yeah. Yeah.
262
00:11:23,347 --> 00:11:25,950
Come on, one more toast
before you eat. One more
toast. I'm in a toasting mood.
263
00:11:25,984 --> 00:11:28,120
I just love
you so much!
264
00:11:28,153 --> 00:11:30,022
Wow.
265
00:11:28,153 --> 00:11:30,022
I just love
you so much!
266
00:11:30,922 --> 00:11:33,091
To my beautiful wife
267
00:11:33,125 --> 00:11:34,860
and our three
beautiful children,
268
00:11:34,893 --> 00:11:36,394
and maybe someday
a fourth.
269
00:11:36,427 --> 00:11:37,897
Oh, honey.
270
00:11:41,332 --> 00:11:43,501
Oh, you know what?
I can't finish that.
271
00:11:43,534 --> 00:11:46,370
I really...
272
00:11:43,534 --> 00:11:46,370
Oh.
273
00:11:46,403 --> 00:11:48,774
So, it's okay for you
to make an effort,
but not me.
274
00:11:52,344 --> 00:11:53,912
I'm sorry, Jim.
275
00:11:53,945 --> 00:11:55,214
It's okay.
276
00:12:01,952 --> 00:12:03,488
Whoo!
277
00:12:01,952 --> 00:12:03,488
Mmm!
278
00:12:03,522 --> 00:12:06,425
Whoo! Whoo!
279
00:12:03,522 --> 00:12:06,425
That a girl, that a girl!
280
00:12:06,457 --> 00:12:09,194
Okay, now I would
tike to loast...
281
00:12:14,365 --> 00:12:16,201
I said tike to loast!
282
00:12:16,234 --> 00:12:19,004
You said
tike to loast!
That's funny.
283
00:12:19,037 --> 00:12:20,105
Let's toast
to tike to loast!
284
00:12:20,138 --> 00:12:21,240
Whoo!
285
00:12:24,308 --> 00:12:25,943
ANNOUNCER ON TV:
And there's a left hook.
286
00:12:25,976 --> 00:12:28,112
Another left hook,
followed by a... Oh!
287
00:12:28,145 --> 00:12:30,915
Oh, look at that hit!
288
00:12:28,145 --> 00:12:30,915
Oh, my God!
289
00:12:30,948 --> 00:12:32,149
He got nailed!
290
00:12:30,948 --> 00:12:32,149
And there's the bell
291
00:12:32,183 --> 00:12:34,819
ending the first round
of the most electrifying
fight...
292
00:12:34,852 --> 00:12:36,287
Oh, wow!
293
00:12:36,321 --> 00:12:39,391
What a great round, man.
What a great round.
294
00:12:39,423 --> 00:12:41,159
Another Shame Stick?
295
00:12:45,197 --> 00:12:46,865
I think I've earned it.
296
00:12:56,006 --> 00:12:57,876
Well, hello,
my young love.
297
00:12:59,177 --> 00:13:01,413
How are we feeling?
298
00:13:01,446 --> 00:13:03,382
Like I swallowed
a barrel of socks.
299
00:13:06,150 --> 00:13:07,485
Then I won't
be kissing you.
300
00:13:08,919 --> 00:13:11,022
Too bad. I could
use the spit.
301
00:13:16,061 --> 00:13:20,264
How could you let
me drink so much
last night?
302
00:13:20,298 --> 00:13:22,301
Cheryl, I'm your husband,
not your sponsor.
303
00:13:25,202 --> 00:13:29,007
I feel like I ruined
our whole evening.
I don't remember anything.
304
00:13:31,909 --> 00:13:32,977
Nothing?
305
00:13:33,311 --> 00:13:34,312
No.
306
00:13:34,346 --> 00:13:36,315
Were you charming and sexy?
307
00:13:37,448 --> 00:13:38,449
I was devastating.
308
00:13:41,052 --> 00:13:43,021
Come here. Tell
me all about it.
309
00:13:43,053 --> 00:13:44,188
You sure you want to know?
310
00:13:44,221 --> 00:13:45,557
Yes.
311
00:13:45,590 --> 00:13:47,024
(SIGHS)
312
00:13:47,057 --> 00:13:48,494
All right,
I'll tell you.
313
00:13:50,195 --> 00:13:51,597
It was a magical night.
314
00:13:52,464 --> 00:13:53,899
For the first hour,
315
00:13:53,932 --> 00:13:56,368
all we did was
hold hands and talk.
316
00:13:58,035 --> 00:13:59,604
Oh, how we talked.
317
00:14:01,306 --> 00:14:03,942
About dreams
and feelings and...
318
00:14:04,643 --> 00:14:05,978
Stuff.
319
00:14:09,147 --> 00:14:11,450
Then we took turns
feeding each other,
320
00:14:11,482 --> 00:14:15,920
feeding each other
the delicious feast
you slaved over.
321
00:14:15,953 --> 00:14:19,056
And then we laughed.
322
00:14:19,090 --> 00:14:23,262
Laughed and laughed.
Oh, how we laughed.
323
00:14:25,462 --> 00:14:27,632
Then we walked to the park,
324
00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:29,600
per your request,
325
00:14:29,634 --> 00:14:32,169
and I carved our
names into a tree
326
00:14:32,202 --> 00:14:35,640
so future generations
can bask in our commitment
to each other.
327
00:14:44,515 --> 00:14:46,951
And at the very end
of the night,
328
00:14:46,985 --> 00:14:49,288
we danced.
329
00:14:49,321 --> 00:14:52,356
We danced with only
the light of the moon
330
00:14:52,389 --> 00:14:54,659
and the glow
of our eternal love.
331
00:14:59,264 --> 00:15:01,166
Aw, honey.
332
00:15:01,198 --> 00:15:03,134
That sounds like
such a special night.
333
00:15:05,235 --> 00:15:06,571
It really does,
doesn't it?
334
00:15:06,604 --> 00:15:07,673
Mmm...
335
00:15:09,474 --> 00:15:12,344
I'm just going to...
I'm going to rest
my eyes for just a minute.
336
00:15:14,278 --> 00:15:17,048
I'm so sorry I missed
our lovely evening.
337
00:15:21,019 --> 00:15:22,153
Me, too.
338
00:15:28,759 --> 00:15:30,028
Mmm...
339
00:15:31,629 --> 00:15:33,032
Brush your teeth.
340
00:15:38,602 --> 00:15:40,271
Hey.
341
00:15:38,602 --> 00:15:40,271
Hey.
342
00:15:40,304 --> 00:15:43,240
Here's the short
skirt you wanted.
You guys going out?
343
00:15:43,274 --> 00:15:45,610
No, I'm wearing it
to clean the house
while Jim watches.
344
00:15:47,044 --> 00:15:48,212
Ew.
345
00:15:48,245 --> 00:15:50,281
Well, I told you,
I'm making an effort.
346
00:15:50,315 --> 00:15:51,650
Oh, are you guys
still doing that?
347
00:15:51,682 --> 00:15:54,285
Well, I feel like I owe it
to him after I passed out
the other night.
348
00:15:54,318 --> 00:15:56,153
Oh, come on,
you spent an entire
night with Jim,
349
00:15:56,187 --> 00:15:59,358
and you don't remember it.
That's my dream come true.
350
00:15:59,390 --> 00:16:02,727
From now on, every time
I come over here, I'm getting
good and hammered.
351
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:06,030
Whoa! What's the deal
with this cable bill?
It's huge.
352
00:16:06,063 --> 00:16:10,067
Jim must have cracked
the parental code
on the TV again.
353
00:16:10,100 --> 00:16:12,037
No, it can't be that.
I used my birthday.
354
00:16:12,070 --> 00:16:13,372
Oh, that's smart.
355
00:16:14,139 --> 00:16:15,173
Oh, here it is.
356
00:16:15,206 --> 00:16:17,274
He ordered one of those
pay-per-view boxing things.
357
00:16:17,307 --> 00:16:19,311
Oh, the Douglas-Manning
fight.
358
00:16:19,344 --> 00:16:21,246
Oh, what a blood-fest.
359
00:16:21,278 --> 00:16:22,548
I watched that with
the kids when they
stayed with me.
360
00:16:25,182 --> 00:16:27,519
Wait a minute,
that was Saturday night.
361
00:16:27,552 --> 00:16:30,221
That... That was the night
of our romantic dinner.
362
00:16:30,254 --> 00:16:33,357
Hmm, you mean the dinner
where Jim got you drunk and
you don't remember a thing?
363
00:16:33,390 --> 00:16:34,993
Could there possibly
be a connection?
364
00:16:37,195 --> 00:16:39,531
No, that, that's impossible.
365
00:16:39,563 --> 00:16:42,099
We danced, and...
366
00:16:42,133 --> 00:16:44,136
And he carved our
names in a tree,
and then...
367
00:16:44,168 --> 00:16:46,071
And then a bird
landed on his finger.
368
00:16:46,104 --> 00:16:49,307
Oh. Did the candlesticks
dance and sing
Be Our Guest?
369
00:16:52,811 --> 00:16:55,480
But... But we talked.
370
00:16:55,513 --> 00:16:56,782
About what?
371
00:16:57,816 --> 00:16:59,151
Stuff.
372
00:17:01,119 --> 00:17:02,454
Oh, my God!
373
00:17:02,486 --> 00:17:04,489
He got me drunk
and watched a fight!
374
00:17:04,521 --> 00:17:07,091
Well, let's see how much
he likes being in a fight.
375
00:17:07,125 --> 00:17:09,428
He's about to go 12 rounds
with the blonde tornado!
376
00:17:09,461 --> 00:17:10,662
Yeah.
377
00:17:09,461 --> 00:17:10,662
Yeah.
378
00:17:11,395 --> 00:17:12,730
Betty, Veronica.
379
00:17:12,763 --> 00:17:14,765
Hey, have you seen Jim?
380
00:17:14,798 --> 00:17:16,167
Why would I know
where Jim is?
381
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:17,536
Because you're his toady.
382
00:17:18,803 --> 00:17:20,172
He's in the tree house.
383
00:17:20,204 --> 00:17:21,639
Ah, the tree house. Perfect.
384
00:17:21,673 --> 00:17:24,042
I can make it look like
an accident when he falls.
385
00:17:25,375 --> 00:17:27,278
So which one am I?
Betty or Veronica?
386
00:17:27,311 --> 00:17:29,580
I don't know.
Whichever one's a jerk.
387
00:17:30,748 --> 00:17:32,750
That's funny.
How's Talia?
388
00:17:37,788 --> 00:17:39,290
I need a Shame Stick.
389
00:17:45,130 --> 00:17:46,498
Jim?
390
00:17:46,530 --> 00:17:49,134
Would you come down here?
I need to talk to you.
391
00:17:49,166 --> 00:17:50,334
Coming.
392
00:17:52,369 --> 00:17:53,504
Hello.
393
00:17:54,338 --> 00:17:55,673
I know what you did.
394
00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:57,742
Cheryl, we've
been together
a long time.
395
00:17:57,775 --> 00:18:01,446
You're going to have
to be a little more
specific than that.
396
00:18:01,479 --> 00:18:04,182
You got me drunk
so you could watch
a stupid boxing match.
397
00:18:06,518 --> 00:18:08,286
Open that door,
or I'll tell everybody
398
00:18:08,318 --> 00:18:10,388
about the time you wore
my maternity underwear.
399
00:18:12,423 --> 00:18:13,791
How did you find out?
400
00:18:13,825 --> 00:18:15,661
The elastic was
shot to hell.
401
00:18:16,794 --> 00:18:18,563
No, about the boxing.
402
00:18:18,596 --> 00:18:19,730
Cable bill.
403
00:18:20,664 --> 00:18:22,733
I don't believe you.
404
00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:25,871
All right, Cheryl, calm down.
Let's discuss this like
adults in the tree house.
405
00:18:25,903 --> 00:18:28,539
Do you happen
to remember
the password?
406
00:18:28,573 --> 00:18:31,143
I am this close
to killing you.
407
00:18:31,175 --> 00:18:32,743
Okay, new password.
408
00:18:33,443 --> 00:18:34,613
Come on.
409
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,650
Oh. (GROANS)
410
00:18:40,718 --> 00:18:42,187
Check it out.
411
00:18:42,220 --> 00:18:43,321
Table for two.
412
00:18:43,354 --> 00:18:44,588
What?
413
00:18:44,622 --> 00:18:46,191
Yeah, see?
414
00:18:46,223 --> 00:18:47,658
I'm making an effort,
415
00:18:47,692 --> 00:18:49,560
like you did the other
night for dinner.
416
00:18:49,594 --> 00:18:51,563
You're just doing this
to get out of trouble.
417
00:18:51,596 --> 00:18:53,865
Cheryl, I didn't even
know I was in trouble
till just now.
418
00:18:53,897 --> 00:18:55,867
I thought I completely
got away with it.
419
00:18:57,902 --> 00:19:00,538
Well, then,
what's all this?
420
00:19:00,571 --> 00:19:02,873
Well, remember
the other morning
when I described
421
00:19:02,906 --> 00:19:05,843
that magical night
we had together?
422
00:19:05,876 --> 00:19:07,878
I'm sure it's pretty clear
now that didn't happen.
423
00:19:07,912 --> 00:19:09,213
Yeah.
424
00:19:10,515 --> 00:19:12,951
Well, when I was
making it up, it...
425
00:19:12,983 --> 00:19:15,886
Well, it sounded so great,
426
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:17,756
I kind of wished
that it was real.
427
00:19:19,624 --> 00:19:20,625
Please.
428
00:19:20,657 --> 00:19:21,692
Oh.
429
00:19:23,928 --> 00:19:25,731
Well, I was
thinking, Cheryl...
430
00:19:26,897 --> 00:19:30,201
I really...
431
00:19:30,234 --> 00:19:33,471
I really don't
want us to coast.
432
00:19:33,503 --> 00:19:36,574
I don't want
to be roommates.
433
00:19:38,409 --> 00:19:40,245
I want to be lovers.
434
00:19:41,412 --> 00:19:42,948
I think we deserve that.
435
00:19:43,881 --> 00:19:45,417
I know I do.
436
00:19:46,784 --> 00:19:47,852
Honey.
437
00:19:47,884 --> 00:19:49,721
That's what I want, too.
438
00:19:49,753 --> 00:19:51,822
That's why I did
that whole dinner thing.
439
00:19:51,855 --> 00:19:53,825
I know, honey, I know,
but you know what?
440
00:19:53,857 --> 00:19:57,828
You picked the worst
night in the world
to do that.
441
00:19:57,862 --> 00:20:00,465
I mean, if it was
any other night,
442
00:20:00,498 --> 00:20:01,732
it would have
been fine.
443
00:20:01,766 --> 00:20:03,401
Really?
444
00:20:01,766 --> 00:20:03,401
Yes.
445
00:20:03,433 --> 00:20:05,237
Yeah. What about
the Super Bowl?
446
00:20:06,503 --> 00:20:08,439
Oh, no, that would
have been bad.
447
00:20:08,472 --> 00:20:09,607
But that's it.
448
00:20:09,641 --> 00:20:11,942
Right. World Series?
449
00:20:11,976 --> 00:20:13,845
No, that would have
been bad, too.
450
00:20:14,945 --> 00:20:16,747
Tony Awards?
451
00:20:16,780 --> 00:20:19,483
You don't tell anybody
about that, do you?
452
00:20:19,517 --> 00:20:20,619
No.
453
00:20:22,319 --> 00:20:24,388
Well, Cheryl,
I'll tell you what,
454
00:20:24,422 --> 00:20:25,957
let's make a deal, okay?
455
00:20:25,990 --> 00:20:27,291
Okay.
456
00:20:28,625 --> 00:20:30,295
Why don't we
457
00:20:30,327 --> 00:20:33,298
make an effort
for each other,
458
00:20:33,330 --> 00:20:35,833
but certain blackout
dates will apply?
459
00:20:41,005 --> 00:20:44,009
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)
460
00:20:45,375 --> 00:20:46,744
Mmm.
461
00:20:46,778 --> 00:20:48,512
They're playing our song.
462
00:20:49,413 --> 00:20:51,482
May I have this dance?
463
00:20:51,516 --> 00:20:53,451
Oh. I would be honored.
464
00:21:00,892 --> 00:21:02,594
Honey?
465
00:21:00,892 --> 00:21:02,594
Hmm?
466
00:21:02,626 --> 00:21:03,961
Do you think
we could be
done by 8:00?
467
00:21:03,994 --> 00:21:05,496
Because The Bachelorette
is really heating up,
468
00:21:05,529 --> 00:21:06,964
and Jen has some
tough decisions to make.
469
00:21:10,367 --> 00:21:12,604
All right, but you're
going to have to get me
really drunk.
470
00:21:12,636 --> 00:21:13,738
Oh.
471
00:21:13,770 --> 00:21:15,406
(LAUGHS)
30645
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