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What you're about to see may be
dangerous, illegal, unethical, petty,
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immoral, and most definitely stupid.
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But it's also all true.
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Sort of.
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I'm gripping the knife.
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I've never been more in the zone. My
pupils are ginormous.
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I lift my hand up.
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And I go, one, I'm completely locked in.
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Two, I see dollar signs in my eyes.
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Three, I wasn't even thinking. Like,
that really wasn't me. I was, I guess,
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a murderer in that point or a butcher. I
was just, the toe needs to come off. I
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need to eat it. I need my $4 ,000.
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My name is Philip. I was born and raised
in Orlando, Florida, and I'm currently
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a cast member at Walt Disney World.
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This story begins to take its shape in
the summer of 2019.
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At that time in my life, me and my
friend were a huge FaceTime fan.
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We formed this, like, traveling circuit
of face -to -face fans. I saw him 33
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times in three years.
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We worshiped him.
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It didn't really matter where the show
was.
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We were going to figure out a way to be
there.
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Bass Nectar was going to be playing a
three -day concert in Colorado.
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I was like, I got to go.
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But I was hurting for cash.
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And so that's when I kind of switched
into the mode of, I need money. I need
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money now.
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Whenever I need to get money quickly, I
hop on America's Best website.
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Craigslist has not failed me. So I made
a post.
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Just saying, I need money now.
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Willing to do anything.
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Within reason.
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Typically, when you put, I need money
offer out, you get the creep saying,
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I'm like, no, I don't have that. I'm
sorry.
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No, I don't have that.
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I'm sorry.
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No, I'm sorry.
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Sorry, I don't want to do that.
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I don't want to fuck anything.
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I just want to work.
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But then Steve messaged me.
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It was pretty intriguing.
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It's pretty intriguing.
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So I responded back saying, I'm your
guy, what's your fantasy?
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Hello?
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This is Steve.
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He was very blunt and to the point. He
said, I want you to cut off three of my
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toes.
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Cook them.
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Eat them.
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Now I want to watch.
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In that moment, I was just like, damn, I
really wish it was sexual.
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It would be a blast.
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I'd like to believe I'm a pretty smart
person, but my brain just was not
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computing the idea that someone wanted
his toes cut off and eaten by a stranger
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from the internet.
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Like, there's just no way.
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I will.
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I've been watching you.
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Don't be shy now.
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Cut those fucking toes off, bitch, and
come to me.
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I was like, you know what? How bad could
it be? How bad could it be?
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All right, I'm in.
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I cut them toes.
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I eat them. I go see Bass Nectar.
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I'm going to see Bass Nectar.
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Everything's good.
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Yeah, I said it.
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I'm a people person at my core. You
know, the customer is always right. It's
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like, fuck it.
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I got to go. You know what I mean? Like,
I've already told the man I'm coming.
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It's his biggest fantasy.
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I can't let him down.
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Mm, yeah.
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Oh, yes.
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I'm going to eat you alive.
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Every person has a fantasy.
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There's nothing wrong with fantasies.
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I am Lucia Gabriela. I'm an intimacy
expert in Sarasota, Florida.
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Unfortunately, people think that you
have to be crazy to engage in these
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practices. Hearing people's fantasies
without judgment, without shame, it
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creates a sacred safe space for people
to really express themselves.
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You know, one of the things about people
who are into, like, very hardcore
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fetishness, like cannibalism, where the
fantasy is about, I want to be eaten.
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The whole desire of someone really eat
them up. Someone wants me so
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much that I am part of them.
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Steve, at a deeper level, is longing so
much to feel connection and love,
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unconditional love.
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Once we agreed that we were going to do
it, he's like, oh, do you have a friend
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that you could bring with you to make me
feel more comfortable?
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And I prefer if it was a female.
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Can you bring a friend?
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Female. And so now my mind is thinking,
you know, who is one, free on like a
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Thursday, and two is down to witness
cannibalism.
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I'll be honest, I tried really hard not
to think of this story for a very long
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time. I don't tell this story to anyone.
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We had been friends since our sophomore
year in high school. I had nothing to
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do, absolutely nothing for two years of
my life.
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I was in a boot due to an Achilles
rupture injury that I had while dancing
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Orlando Magic. And then Phil reaches out
to me. It was from left field.
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I give her a call, and I'm like,
Carolyn, you're not going to believe I'm
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getting ready to tell you. He then lets
me know that, look, someone has asked me
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to do something very bizarre.
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He wants me to cut his toe off.
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You can see she's visibly, like,
distraught. She's like...
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What? I think that because of our
relationship previously, we just always
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established that nothing was off the
table. I think Phil knew in asking me
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specifically that I genuinely would not
judge him. So I was really worried on
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like a legal level, right, of the
legalities of this. Because worst case
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scenario in my mind is that this goes
horribly wrong.
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And then we get questioned by the cops
or otherwise.
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Like, what are you all even doing here,
and how do you know each other?
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We're here to cut Steve's toes off and
eat them.
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We're high school friends.
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And she was like, are you actually going
to do this? And I was like, I think I
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have to. You know what I mean? Like,
this is big as fantasy.
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I kind of want to help him out. I was
honestly, in a weird way, honored more
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than anything.
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But he had reached out to me for this
odd job, so to speak.
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On the drive over, it's like I'm on a
drug.
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Except it's not a drug.
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It's an idea.
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The drug is the idea of being in
Colorado with my best friend, listening
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Nectar. Come to me.
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Come to me.
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Bass, Bass, Bass, Bass.
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So when we get there to Steve's house,
we see that there's only one way in and
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really one way out.
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We're walking in with zero
understanding. We haven't even seen a
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Steve at that point.
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You know, this is the kind of stuff your
parents, they don't do.
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Don't talk strangers on the internet.
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Don't take your best friend to their
house at night.
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They would textbook stranger danger out,
which is breaking all the rules.
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I think I imagine Steve being like...
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a recluse and, like, a hoarder, like, in
his mother's basement or something,
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like, playing video games with, like, a
bag of Funyuns.
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Maybe he just likes feet and he wants,
like, a feet act done.
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Maybe he's a maniac.
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No. Hi.
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He's a very friendly middle -aged guy.
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I'm a very friendly middle -aged guy.
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Come on in.
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Welcome.
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Make yourself at home. Steve seemed to
have a pretty good life for himself. He
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had a nice townhouse. He had nice
furniture, big TV.
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He was so normal.
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He's so normal.
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I am so normal. Thank you for mentioning
that.
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He offered me a beer, which I accepted.
I believe it was a Stella Artois, which
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is, eh, you know, but I accepted the
offer.
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Cheers.
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It's a really weird setting to, like, do
cannibalism.
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And that's when I see his setup.
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He had like a sterile pad on the ground,
a cutting board, large knives, but they
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were kitchen knives, which I thought was
a bit weird. It wasn't like a medical
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grade knife.
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We could really do some damage here and
we are in no way medical professionals.
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I was starting to get like a bit
nervous, but then I remembered why I was
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Sometimes in life we do things that we
don't really want to do for a greater
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cause. Yeah.
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And this is one of those moments.
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So the contract for $2 ,000, the light
bulb in my head goes off, and I remember
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I'm a vegetarian.
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I don't even eat chicken.
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I'm about to eat a guy's toe.
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So I bumped it up to $4 ,000.
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Did he ever eat?
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Eddie?
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Yep. All right. He told me which toes he
exactly wanted cut off.
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I had Carolyn draw out where on the toes
I needed to cut to get, like, a clean
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chop.
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And then the arched part on the side of
the foot cut off and eaten.
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We've established, hey, there's no
artery here. Like, we're going to be
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She also took some of that ointment and
put it all over his foot.
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We established I was going to go one,
two, three, knife on to foot. The cut is
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happening.
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We also established a safe word, which
was going to be Connecticut.
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Connecticut. Because that's where Steve
was born and raised.
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And now it's showtime.
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I'm ready to go.
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I've never been more in the zone.
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I can feel the excitement of knowing
that I'm going to have the money to see
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Bassneck here building in my body.
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Carolyn's holding his hand.
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He was sweating. He was a nervous wreck.
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All right.
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NBA playoffs are in the background.
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This is what all comes down to, folks.
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A moment of truth. He gives me a thumbs
up.
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Let's fucking do this.
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Having the knife on the toe really, I
think, put it into perspective, the
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gravity of what we're going to do, and
it was petrifying.
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It was kind of this joined energy, like
a trance almost. We weren't worried
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about the score of the playoffs anymore.
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It was really this moment of like, okay,
we're going to do it.
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I'm laser focused. I'm like talking to
myself in my mind, kind of like, you
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know.
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The angel and the devil, you know, you
shouldn't do this, but the devil's like,
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this is your moment right now.
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You want the money. You want the base.
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Do this.
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And so I was like, I'm riding with the
devil tonight.
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Let's fucking do this.
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So I go, what?
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Three, knife onto the foot. I lift my
hand up.
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You fucking do this.
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Connecticut! Oh, fuck!
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00:14:58,150 --> 00:15:02,950
Connecticut! Sorry, sorry. What's up?
I'm like, what's wrong? What's the
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00:15:03,150 --> 00:15:07,090
And that's when he reveals to me that he
is a karate teacher.
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Now, he's not sure how he's going to be
able to teach karate.
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without his toes and this is when i
start to get the idea
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that maybe he doesn't have much of this
planned out hey i'm going to show
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my feet to my students and they're going
to be freaked out oh i reiterate to him
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that this is your dream which is what
you want you drag me out here on a
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thursday night So we're going to do it.
There's no backing out now.
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Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm good. We were
trying to convince D more than anything
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go through with it. He couldn't really
take looking at the situation while it
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was happening.
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So we decided to do it on his stomach.
Yeah. Because I think seeing it, you
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don't want to see that.
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Thank you. Yeah.
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Okay. Okay.
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00:15:58,110 --> 00:15:59,110
Let's try again.
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00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:09,660
I am so ready to... Give me a fucking
toe, bitch!
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I want one. I can
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feel it on my lips.
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00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:21,520
Connecticut! Connecticut! Connecticut!
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Connecticut! Fuck you!
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Sorry.
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He's looking to another spiel about how
he's going to see all his friends and
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family, and he's not sure how to explain
to them why he's missing half of his
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foot. So I was like, well, Steve, that's
something that you probably should have
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thought about. And now I'm starting to
get a little pissed off, because I'm
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like, is this man going to pussy out
over his fantasy?
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Pussy.
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00:16:51,820 --> 00:16:54,060
Let me just put myself on his shoes.
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Mmm. Mmm.
238
00:17:01,370 --> 00:17:07,069
The turn on is when it stays in the
fantasy world. Mmm, this is so yummy.
239
00:17:07,730 --> 00:17:12,230
Once the idea of becoming real, they
just get repulsed by it. Like, they just
240
00:17:12,230 --> 00:17:14,130
get like, not about them.
241
00:17:16,210 --> 00:17:19,130
So here we are, round three.
242
00:17:19,349 --> 00:17:23,109
I think there's a little bit of anger in
my hand with the knife now. I'm like,
243
00:17:23,190 --> 00:17:24,710
this toe's got to come off.
244
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:31,420
I see dollar signs in my eyes, and the
man who dragged me out here is getting
245
00:17:31,420 --> 00:17:33,740
the way of me getting that money.
246
00:17:34,180 --> 00:17:35,320
I wasn't even thinking.
247
00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:39,300
Like, that really wasn't me. I was, I
guess, like a murderer in that point, or
248
00:17:39,300 --> 00:17:42,860
butcher. I was just, it told me to come
off. I need to eat it. I need my $4
249
00:17:42,860 --> 00:17:45,100
,000. We've come so close.
250
00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:51,020
And I go, one, two, three.
251
00:17:52,260 --> 00:17:53,280
Connecticut! Connecticut!
252
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:54,760
Connecticut! I can't!
253
00:17:55,130 --> 00:17:59,370
I can't. I'm so sorry. He goes, no, I
can't. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I just
254
00:17:59,370 --> 00:18:01,730
can't. I'm really sorry I wasted your
guys' time.
255
00:18:02,150 --> 00:18:04,050
I just don't think I'm ready yet.
256
00:18:05,350 --> 00:18:11,170
I come to a stop, and like a rush comes
over me, and
257
00:18:11,170 --> 00:18:13,490
it dies.
258
00:18:22,190 --> 00:18:26,010
We just finished our beers and watched
the last little clip of the playoff.
259
00:18:28,670 --> 00:18:35,590
And kind of seemed like a bad first
date. I mean, it was just really awkward
260
00:18:35,590 --> 00:18:37,170
and hard to pull away from.
261
00:18:38,770 --> 00:18:45,570
And then he surprised me saying that I
was going to be paid simply for showing
262
00:18:45,570 --> 00:18:46,570
up.
263
00:18:48,550 --> 00:18:49,910
He sends me the money.
264
00:18:50,150 --> 00:18:51,150
Thank you.
265
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:54,280
And Carolyn and I go about our way.
266
00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:55,720
Thank you.
267
00:18:57,200 --> 00:19:02,380
We get into the car and we kind of just
sit in silence for a while because we
268
00:19:02,380 --> 00:19:05,240
can't really believe that, like, that
happened.
269
00:19:05,540 --> 00:19:06,580
I can't really believe that happened.
270
00:19:07,860 --> 00:19:11,280
I looked at her and I was like, what do
you want to do now? And she was like,
271
00:19:11,340 --> 00:19:15,520
oh, do you want to go grab a drink? I'm
like, that seems like the only decent
272
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:16,860
thing we can do right now.
273
00:19:25,610 --> 00:19:28,570
So then we just start drinking straight
tequila.
274
00:19:29,290 --> 00:19:33,290
I think that we did everything we could
to possibly just push it to the back of
275
00:19:33,290 --> 00:19:34,290
our mind.
276
00:19:35,370 --> 00:19:38,470
So the bar was closing. I was like, you
know, I don't think I really want to go
277
00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:39,910
home. I don't think I want to go home.
278
00:19:41,170 --> 00:19:42,390
So we go back to her house.
279
00:19:42,750 --> 00:19:44,190
Believe we had a bottle of wine.
280
00:19:45,190 --> 00:19:46,810
We just kind of like cuddled.
281
00:19:48,170 --> 00:19:52,890
This new form of bond now existed
between me and Carolyn where I was like,
282
00:19:52,890 --> 00:19:53,890
think I love this girl.
283
00:20:24,110 --> 00:20:26,350
I've always found her to be attractive.
284
00:20:27,230 --> 00:20:30,750
This really brought us together like two
peas in a pod.
285
00:20:32,150 --> 00:20:34,990
Phil is one of the best personalities
that I've ever met.
286
00:20:35,270 --> 00:20:40,030
I appreciate the fact that he has this
boldness in him and the capability to be
287
00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:42,810
bold. I got one of the most important
people back in my life.
288
00:20:44,550 --> 00:20:46,950
So everything's good. I got money.
289
00:20:47,210 --> 00:20:48,510
I flew to Colorado.
290
00:20:49,310 --> 00:20:53,170
When I finally landed in Denver, my
friends picked me up. We get some beers.
291
00:20:53,170 --> 00:20:56,390
go to a brewery. All I wanted to do was
hear some music.
292
00:20:56,630 --> 00:21:00,490
As we were headed to the venue, we see
that the show has been canceled.
293
00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:05,790
A lawsuit filed against bass actor
claims that the electronic dance music
294
00:21:05,790 --> 00:21:09,370
sexually abused two women. Ashton has
called the claims untrue.
295
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:12,960
So my heart dropped. I was so furious.
296
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,720
I flew across the country. I almost ate
a toe.
297
00:21:16,020 --> 00:21:20,640
I had a very traumatic experience to get
to this point. The times were good, but
298
00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:24,740
I feel like I can't support something
like that.
299
00:21:24,940 --> 00:21:30,920
And that's when I really started to kind
of change my perspective and what's
300
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:31,920
really important.
301
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:38,920
Inside of me, there's two of me. There's
fuck it Phil and responsible Phil.
302
00:21:39,450 --> 00:21:43,010
And for much of my early 20s, Fuck It
Phil ran the show.
303
00:21:43,450 --> 00:21:44,890
I'm happy that I've grown.
304
00:21:45,270 --> 00:21:49,410
I don't get myself in these kind of
situations still to this day.
305
00:21:49,670 --> 00:21:53,030
I would not do this today. I'd like to
think I wouldn't.
306
00:21:54,150 --> 00:21:55,330
He could have died.
307
00:21:55,590 --> 00:21:59,190
We didn't have proper medical stuff
there. He could have bled out. Now I'm
308
00:21:59,190 --> 00:22:02,750
charged with maybe like a manslaughter
because I wanted to go to a concert.
309
00:22:03,790 --> 00:22:04,870
Who was I?
310
00:22:05,260 --> 00:22:07,260
and what was going on in my head.
311
00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:09,340
I don't think now I would ever do it.
312
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:16,720
But there are moments where I will post
on Craigslist looking to make a quick
313
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:23,120
buck or two and I'll get a message
saying, hey, do you think you can help
314
00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:24,120
with my biggest fantasy?
315
00:22:24,140 --> 00:22:27,000
And I just know based on the wording
that it's Steve.
316
00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:31,240
And every now and then I'll respond back
and be like, hey Steve, do you remember
317
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:32,240
me?
318
00:22:32,260 --> 00:22:33,880
And he goes, oh yeah.
319
00:22:34,540 --> 00:22:35,540
Hey, how's it going?
320
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:36,780
Are you willing to give it another try?
321
00:22:39,020 --> 00:22:42,360
I'm like, sorry Steve, I can't go back.
I can't do this again.
322
00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:46,640
Random question.
323
00:22:47,580 --> 00:22:51,080
What if one day I'm like trying to get a
job and they're like, aren't you that
324
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:51,919
toe guy?
325
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:52,980
You're only thinking about the snap?
326
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,000
Ha ha ha.
26069
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