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1
00:00:02,502 --> 00:00:05,671
All right,
I'm moving my infantry division...
2
00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:08,757
...augmented by a battalion of orcs
from Lord of the Rings.
3
00:00:08,925 --> 00:00:10,592
We flank the Tennessee volunteers...
4
00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:13,929
...and the North once again
wins the Battle of Gettysburg.
5
00:00:14,097 --> 00:00:17,182
Not so fast. Remember, the South
still has two infantry divisions.
6
00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:19,643
Plus Superman and Godzilla.
7
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:21,687
No, no, no. Orcs are magic.
8
00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:23,355
Superman is vulnerable to magic.
9
00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:25,566
Not to mention,
you already lost Godzilla...
10
00:00:25,734 --> 00:00:28,027
...to the Illinois cavalry and Hulk.
11
00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:32,406
Why don't you just have Robert E. Lee
charge the line with Shiva and Ganesh?
12
00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:34,158
-You guys ready to order?
-Hang on.
13
00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:35,909
Shiva and Ganesh?
14
00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:38,579
The Hindu gods
against the entire Union Army?
15
00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:40,456
And orcs.
16
00:00:40,623 --> 00:00:42,124
I'll be back.
17
00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:45,794
Excuse me. Ganesh is the remover
of obstacles and Shiva's the destroyer.
18
00:00:45,962 --> 00:00:48,547
When the smoke clears,
Lincoln will be speaking Hindi...
19
00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:50,299
...and drinking mint juleps.
20
00:00:50,842 --> 00:00:54,261
My boss says you have to either
order or leave and never come back.
21
00:00:54,929 --> 00:00:57,806
What do you recommend for someone
with a man-sized appetite...
22
00:00:57,974 --> 00:01:00,434
...from a morning of
weight-training and cardio-funk?
23
00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:01,685
A shower.
24
00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:05,064
I'll take the heart-smart platter.
25
00:01:05,482 --> 00:01:07,316
All right, thank you. And Sheldon?
26
00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:09,735
We don't eat here.
I don't know what's good.
27
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:12,446
-Well, it's all good.
-Statistically unlikely.
28
00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:15,324
Just get a hamburger.
You like hamburgers.
29
00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:17,493
I like the hamburgers
where we usually eat.
30
00:01:17,660 --> 00:01:20,704
You can't make the assumption
that I'll like the hamburgers here.
31
00:01:20,872 --> 00:01:23,499
I'm sorry. Give him a hamburger.
32
00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:25,542
Which one,
the classic, the ranch house...
33
00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,920
...the barbeque burger
or the Kobe burger?
34
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:30,005
Can't we just go to Big Boy?
35
00:01:30,173 --> 00:01:34,802
-They only have one burger, the Big Boy.
-The barbeque burger's like the Big Boy.
36
00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:37,346
In a world that already
includes a Big Boy...
37
00:01:37,514 --> 00:01:39,848
...why would I settle for something
like a Big Boy?
38
00:01:40,016 --> 00:01:42,142
Because you are not at Big Boy.
39
00:01:43,144 --> 00:01:45,854
-Fine. I'll have the barbeque burger.
-Make it two.
40
00:01:46,022 --> 00:01:48,315
Waitresses don't yell at you at Big Boy.
41
00:01:49,526 --> 00:01:50,901
Hey, Leonard. Hi, guys.
44
00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:59,493
Leslie, this is Penny, she lives across
the hall from Sheldon and me.
45
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:02,412
And walks in quiet beauty
like the night.
46
00:02:03,039 --> 00:02:05,082
Howard, I've asked you not to do that.
47
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,627
Leslie and I do research together
at the university.
48
00:02:08,837 --> 00:02:11,004
Oh, wow. A girl scientist.
49
00:02:11,172 --> 00:02:13,465
Yep. Come for the breasts,
stay for the brains.
50
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:15,634
So I'm glad I ran into you.
51
00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:18,512
The Physics Department string quartet
needs a new cellist.
52
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,055
What happened to Elliott Wong?
53
00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:23,100
Switched over to high-energy
radiation research, had a mishap.
54
00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:26,186
And now the other guys
are uncomfortable sitting next to him.
55
00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,564
-So are you in?
-Yeah, sure. Why not?
56
00:02:28,731 --> 00:02:32,109
-We rehearse on Tuesdays at your place.
-Why at my place?
57
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:35,612
Yeah, Department of Energy said
our regular space is kind of a hot zone.
58
00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:38,407
-Nice meeting you.
-Yeah, you too.
59
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:40,784
Leonard, I didn't know
you played the cello.
60
00:02:40,952 --> 00:02:43,120
Yeah, my parents felt
that naming me Leonard...
61
00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:45,581
...and putting me
in advanced-placement classes...
62
00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:47,666
...wasn't getting me beaten up enough.
63
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:50,586
If you're into music, I happen
to be a human beatbox...
64
00:02:50,753 --> 00:02:52,337
-...so....
-Really?
65
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:01,263
I'm actually not that into music.
66
00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:05,142
Your friend's really cute.
Anything going on with you two?
67
00:03:05,685 --> 00:03:06,810
Leslie?
68
00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:09,271
No, no. What, are you kidding?
69
00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:12,441
He asked her out once.
It was an embarrassing failure.
70
00:03:12,775 --> 00:03:13,817
Thank you, Sheldon.
71
00:03:13,985 --> 00:03:16,153
I'm sorry.
Was that supposed to be a secret?
72
00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:20,115
That's too bad.
You guys would make a cute couple.
73
00:03:21,784 --> 00:03:23,577
-Oh, dear.
-What's the matter?
74
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:24,912
She didn't take my order.
75
00:03:25,079 --> 00:03:28,290
How could she take your order
when you're too neurotic to talk to her?
76
00:03:29,083 --> 00:03:32,461
Nevertheless,
this will be reflected in her tip.
77
00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:37,966
What did Penny mean,
"you'd make a cute couple"?
78
00:03:38,134 --> 00:03:39,801
I assume she meant
the two of you...
79
00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:43,513
...would constitute a couple
that others might consider cute.
80
00:03:45,141 --> 00:03:49,853
An alternate and less likely interpretation
is that you could manufacture one.
81
00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:53,732
As in, "Look, Leonard and Leslie
made Mr. and Mrs. Goldfarb.
82
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,692
Aren't they adorable?"
83
00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:58,445
If Penny didn't know
that Leslie had turned me down...
84
00:03:58,613 --> 00:04:02,824
...then that would mean that she, Penny,
thought I should ask her, Leslie, out...
85
00:04:02,992 --> 00:04:05,827
...indicating that Penny had no interest
in me asking her out.
86
00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:08,330
But because she did know
I had asked Leslie out...
87
00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:10,582
...and that she, Leslie,
had turned me down...
88
00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:14,169
...then she, Penny,
could be offering consolation.
89
00:04:15,546 --> 00:04:18,340
"That's too bad,
you would have made a cute couple."
90
00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:22,928
But while thinking,
"Good, Leonard remains available."
91
00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:26,431
You're a lucky man, Leonard.
92
00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:28,725
How so?
93
00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:31,144
You're talking to one of
the three men in the West...
94
00:04:31,312 --> 00:04:33,730
...capable of following
that train of thought.
95
00:04:34,857 --> 00:04:35,983
Well, what do you think?
96
00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:39,152
I said I could follow it,
I didn't say I cared.
97
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:12,311
I admire your fingering.
98
00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:14,438
Thank you.
99
00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:18,400
Maybe sometime you can
try that on my instrument.
100
00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:28,910
Good night, guys. Good job.
- Thanks.
101
00:05:29,078 --> 00:05:30,579
See you next week.
102
00:05:30,913 --> 00:05:33,582
-That was fun. Thanks for including me.
-You're welcome.
103
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:36,960
If you're up for it, we could practice
that middle section again.
104
00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:39,046
Sure. Why not?
105
00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:48,305
Just so we're clear, you understand
me hanging back to practice with you...
106
00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:51,058
...is a pretext for letting you know
that I'm sexually available.
107
00:05:58,483 --> 00:05:59,775
Really?
108
00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:01,318
Yeah, I'm good to go.
109
00:06:01,986 --> 00:06:03,987
I thought you weren't interested in me.
110
00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:08,617
That was before I saw you handling that
beautiful piece of wood between your legs.
111
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,037
You mean my cello.
112
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,664
No, I mean the obvious,
crude double entendre.
113
00:06:14,832 --> 00:06:16,875
I'm seducing you.
114
00:06:18,086 --> 00:06:20,003
No kidding.
115
00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:23,673
What can I say?
I'm a passionate and impulsive woman.
116
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:25,592
So how about it?
117
00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:28,303
Gee....
118
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:32,182
-Is it the waitress?
-Penny? What about her?
119
00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:34,643
I saw your pupils dilate
when you looked at her...
120
00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:38,188
...which, unless you're a heroin addict,
points to sexual attraction.
121
00:06:39,607 --> 00:06:41,691
I did have a poppy-seed bagel
for breakfast...
122
00:06:41,859 --> 00:06:44,653
...which could give
a positive urine test for opiates...
123
00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:46,655
...but certainly not dilate my pupils...
124
00:06:46,823 --> 00:06:49,741
...so I guess there was no point
in bringing it up.
125
00:06:50,701 --> 00:06:53,662
-You and the waitress, then.
-No, no.
126
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:56,498
There's nothing going on
between Penny and me.
127
00:06:56,707 --> 00:06:59,126
So you're open to a sexual relationship?
128
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,295
Yeah. Yeah, I guess I am.
129
00:07:02,463 --> 00:07:04,047
-Good.
-Yeah, it is.
130
00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:05,882
It is good.
131
00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:09,177
Did you wanna start now?
132
00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:12,472
-Why don't we finish this section first?
-Oh, okay.
133
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:14,766
A little musical foreplay. Terrific.
134
00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:37,789
-I'm-- Good to go.
-Me too.
135
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:51,720
Oh. Hey, Sheldon. What's going on?
136
00:07:52,138 --> 00:07:54,473
I need your opinion
on a matter of semiotics.
137
00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:58,226
-I'm sorry?
-Semiotics, the study of signs and symbols.
138
00:07:58,394 --> 00:08:01,521
It's a branch of philosophy
related to linguistics.
139
00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:06,526
Okay, sweetie, I know you think
you're explaining yourself...
140
00:08:06,694 --> 00:08:09,112
...but you're really not.
141
00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:12,491
Just come with me.
142
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:15,243
Tell me have you ever really
143
00:08:15,411 --> 00:08:17,037
Really, really ever loved a woman?
144
00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:18,246
Well?
145
00:08:18,414 --> 00:08:21,458
-Well, what?
-What does it mean?
146
00:08:21,792 --> 00:08:23,627
Come on, you went to college.
147
00:08:23,794 --> 00:08:26,087
Yes, but I was 11.
148
00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:31,676
A tie on the doorknob usually means
someone doesn't wanna be disturbed...
149
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:36,181
...because they're, you know,
getting busy.
150
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,267
So you're saying
Leonard has a girl in there?
151
00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:44,231
Well, either that or he's lost his tie rack
and gotten really into Bryan Adams.
152
00:08:45,274 --> 00:08:47,317
Oh, Leonard, you magnificent beast.
153
00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:53,448
We really shouldn't be standing here.
154
00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:57,369
This is very awkward.
155
00:08:57,620 --> 00:09:00,872
Oh, come on. You know,
Leonard's had girls over before, right?
156
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:05,293
Oh, yes. But there's usually planning,
courtship, advance notice.
157
00:09:05,836 --> 00:09:10,674
You know, last time, I was able to book
a cruise to the Arctic to see a solar eclipse.
158
00:09:11,592 --> 00:09:15,095
Wait, wait. You had to leave the state
because your roommate was having sex?
159
00:09:15,263 --> 00:09:18,306
I didn't have to.
The dates just happened to coincide.
160
00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:23,186
So do you know who's in there?
161
00:09:24,146 --> 00:09:26,273
Well, there's Leonard.
162
00:09:29,318 --> 00:09:33,780
And he's either with Leslie Winkle
or a 1930s gangster.
163
00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:38,785
Hmm. Good for him.
164
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:41,413
Good for Leonard.
165
00:09:42,498 --> 00:09:43,623
Okay. Night.
166
00:09:43,791 --> 00:09:45,417
No, don't. Wait, hold on.
167
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,920
-What's the matter?
-I don't know what the protocol is here.
168
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,841
Do I stay? Do I leave?
169
00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:55,719
Do I wait to greet them
with a refreshing beverage?
170
00:09:57,805 --> 00:09:59,764
Gee, Sheldon,
you're asking the wrong girl.
171
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:02,058
I'm usually on the other side
of the tie.
172
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:24,748
Hi, Leonard?
173
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,210
It's me.
174
00:10:29,378 --> 00:10:31,046
Sheldon.
175
00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:33,882
In the living room.
176
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:36,468
I just--
I wanted you to know I saw the tie.
177
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:39,262
Message received.
178
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:44,017
You're welcome.
179
00:10:44,977 --> 00:10:48,647
You carry on. Give my best to Leslie.
180
00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:27,644
Big Boy.
181
00:11:52,336 --> 00:11:54,796
Someone touched my board.
182
00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,843
Oh, God, my board.
183
00:12:01,804 --> 00:12:03,471
Leonard.
184
00:12:03,639 --> 00:12:05,473
Leonard!
185
00:12:05,641 --> 00:12:07,350
Hey, what's the matter?
186
00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,728
Equations.
Someone's tampered with my equations.
187
00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,146
-Are you sure?
-Of course.
188
00:12:11,313 --> 00:12:13,732
Look at the beta function
of quantum chromodynamics.
189
00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:15,984
The sign's been changed.
190
00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:17,485
Oh, yeah.
191
00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:20,029
But doesn't that fix the problem
you've been having?
192
00:12:20,197 --> 00:12:22,490
Are you insane?
Are you out of your mind?
193
00:12:22,658 --> 00:12:26,035
Are you--? Hey, look, that fixes
the problem I've been having.
194
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,038
You're welcome.
195
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:32,333
You did this?
196
00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:35,503
Yeah. I noticed it when I got up
to get water, so I fixed it.
197
00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:38,757
Now you can show quarks are
asymptotically free at high energies.
198
00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:40,383
Pretty cool, huh?
199
00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:43,845
"Cool"?
200
00:12:44,388 --> 00:12:45,847
Listen, I gotta get to the lab.
201
00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:48,016
Thanks for a great night.
202
00:12:49,059 --> 00:12:50,643
Thank you. I'll see you at work.
203
00:12:51,562 --> 00:12:54,272
-Hold on. Hold on.
-What?
204
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,358
-Who told you you could touch my board?
-No one.
205
00:12:57,526 --> 00:13:00,069
I don't come into your house
and touch your board.
206
00:13:00,237 --> 00:13:02,572
There are no incorrect equations
on my board.
207
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:09,412
Oh, that is so, so....
208
00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:14,751
I'm sorry, I gotta run. If you
come up with an adjective, text me.
209
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:22,050
Inconsiderate. That is the adjective.
Inconsiderate.
210
00:13:23,719 --> 00:13:26,763
You can stare at your board all day,
she's still going to be right.
211
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,556
I'm not staring, I'm mulling.
212
00:13:28,724 --> 00:13:30,475
-Oh, hey, Leonard.
-Hi.
213
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:35,063
So how's it going?
214
00:13:37,316 --> 00:13:39,442
Pretty good.
215
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:43,696
Just pretty good? I'd think
you were doing very good.
216
00:13:44,907 --> 00:13:48,827
"Pretty, very." There's really no objective
scale for delineating variations of good.
217
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:51,120
Why do you ask?
218
00:13:51,288 --> 00:13:55,124
Well, a little bird told me that
you and Leslie hooked up last night.
219
00:13:56,961 --> 00:13:59,796
- Sheldon!
- I'm coming.
220
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:02,549
So is it serious? Do you like her?
221
00:14:02,925 --> 00:14:04,634
I don't....
222
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:09,681
That's really two different questions.
I'm not--
223
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:11,599
Sheldon, we have to go.
224
00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:16,104
Boy, you're wound awfully tight
for a man who just had sexual intercourse.
225
00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:21,568
All right, well, I'll talk to you later.
But I am so happy for you, Leonard.
226
00:14:22,736 --> 00:14:24,445
Thank you.
227
00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,951
What did she mean, she's happy for me?
228
00:14:30,119 --> 00:14:33,746
Is she happy because I'm seeing someone
or because she thinks I'm happy?
229
00:14:33,914 --> 00:14:36,958
Because anyone who cared for someone
would want them to be happy...
230
00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:40,795
...even if the reason for their happiness
made the first person unhappy.
231
00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:43,339
You know, because the second person,
though happy...
232
00:14:43,507 --> 00:14:46,885
...is now romantically unavailable
to the first person.
233
00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:51,556
Do you realize I may have to share
a Nobel Prize with your booty call?
234
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,269
You know what?
235
00:14:56,437 --> 00:14:58,021
I'm being ridiculous.
236
00:14:58,856 --> 00:15:00,565
But who cares what Penny thinks?
237
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:03,902
Leslie is a terrific girl.
She's attractive. We like each other.
238
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:05,653
She's extremely intelligent.
239
00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:08,698
- She's not that intelligent.
- She fixed your equation.
240
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:11,159
- She got lucky.
- You don't believe in luck.
241
00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:13,828
I don't have to believe in it
for her to be lucky.
242
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:17,332
Regardless, I have a chance
at a real relationship with Leslie.
243
00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:20,668
I'm not gonna pass that up for
some hypothetical future happiness...
244
00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:23,838
...with a woman who may
or may not want me to be happy...
245
00:15:24,006 --> 00:15:27,425
...with the woman
who is currently making me happy.
246
00:15:28,135 --> 00:15:29,344
- Leonard.
- Yeah?
247
00:15:29,511 --> 00:15:31,721
I still don't care.
248
00:15:39,855 --> 00:15:41,189
Hey, Leslie.
249
00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:44,817
Careful, Leonard. Liquid nitrogen,
320 degrees below zero.
250
00:15:45,861 --> 00:15:47,946
Brrrr. Heh.
251
00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:55,995
Why are you smashing
a flash-frozen banana?
252
00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:59,207
Because I got a bowl of Cheerios
and I couldn't find a knife.
253
00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:05,421
So anyway, hello.
254
00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:09,217
What are you doing?
255
00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:11,636
Just extending the intimacy.
256
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:14,138
Hey, do you wanna slip over
to the radiation lab...
257
00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:17,141
...and share a decontamination shower?
258
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:24,273
Okay, what exactly do you think's
going on between us?
259
00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:29,404
I'm not sure, but I think I'm about
to discover how the banana felt.
260
00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:37,537
Neither of us are neuroscientists, but we
both understand the biochemistry of sex.
261
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:41,124
Dopamine in our brains is released
across synapses, causing pleasure.
262
00:16:41,291 --> 00:16:44,085
Stick electrodes in a rat's brain,
give him an orgasm button.
263
00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:46,963
He'll push that thing
until he starves to death.
264
00:16:47,131 --> 00:16:49,007
Well, who wouldn't? Heh.
265
00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:51,050
The difference between us and the rat...
266
00:16:51,218 --> 00:16:53,761
...is you can't stick an electrode
in our hypothalamus.
267
00:16:53,929 --> 00:16:55,430
That's where you come in.
268
00:16:57,433 --> 00:17:00,435
Yeah, well,
I'm just glad to be a part of it. Heh.
269
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:02,812
So, what happens now?
270
00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:06,733
Well, I don't know about your sex drive,
but I'm probably good till New Year's.
271
00:17:08,527 --> 00:17:09,777
Oh.
272
00:17:09,945 --> 00:17:11,571
Okay.
273
00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:14,407
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
274
00:17:17,244 --> 00:17:20,371
-You wanna make plans for New Year's?
-Please, you're smothering me.
275
00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:22,415
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
276
00:17:23,250 --> 00:17:26,002
Hey, look. It's Dr. Stud.
277
00:17:27,254 --> 00:17:28,296
Doctor what?
278
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:31,132
The blogosphere is abuzzing
with news of you and Leslie...
279
00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:34,427
...making the bang, bang music.
280
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:38,806
-Well, how did it get on the Internet?
-I put it there.
281
00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,017
Well, how did you know about it?
282
00:17:41,185 --> 00:17:42,852
A little bird told us.
283
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,814
Apparently, you are a magnificent beast.
284
00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:51,819
Well, that part's true.
285
00:17:56,533 --> 00:17:58,701
I think I may have
misjudged this restaurant.
286
00:17:58,869 --> 00:18:00,995
-No kidding.
-I don't wanna go out on a limb...
287
00:18:01,163 --> 00:18:04,373
...but I think we may be looking
at my new Tuesday hamburger.
288
00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:08,836
Your old Tuesday hamburger
will be so brokenhearted.
289
00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:10,713
Way ahead of you.
290
00:18:10,881 --> 00:18:15,426
I was thinking of moving Big Boy to
Thursdays and just dropping Souplantation.
291
00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:17,428
-Really?
-Yeah.
292
00:18:17,596 --> 00:18:20,848
The name always confused me, anyway.
Souplantation.
293
00:18:21,016 --> 00:18:22,850
You can't grow soup.
294
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:28,773
-So how's everything?
-Terrific.
295
00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:32,944
You'll be happy to know I plan to come
every Tuesday for the foreseeable future.
296
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:36,030
Really? Oh, yay. Heh.
297
00:18:36,824 --> 00:18:39,700
Who do I speak to about
permanently reserving this table?
298
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:43,204
I don't know, a psychiatrist?
299
00:18:44,581 --> 00:18:46,040
So, hey.
300
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:49,585
-How are things with you and Leslie?
-Oh.
301
00:18:49,753 --> 00:18:52,463
To be honest,
I don't think it's going to work out.
302
00:18:53,757 --> 00:18:56,509
Oh, that's too bad.
Well, hey, don't worry.
303
00:18:56,677 --> 00:19:00,138
I'm sure there's someone out there
who's just right for you.
304
00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:05,643
Well, what did she mean by that?
305
00:19:06,019 --> 00:19:10,231
Was that just a generic platitude
or was that a subtle bid for attention?
306
00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:15,653
You know why this hamburger
surpasses the Big Boy?
307
00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:18,990
This is a single-decker,
whereas the Big Boy is a double-decker.
308
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:23,244
This has a much more satisfying
meat-to-bun-to-condiment ratio.
309
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:26,581
-Are you even listening to me?
-Of course I'm listening.
310
00:19:26,748 --> 00:19:30,418
Blah, blah, hopeless Penny delusion,
blah, blah, blah.
311
00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:34,046
Okay, then.
312
00:19:35,632 --> 00:19:38,759
You know, you can grow
the ingredients for soup.
23613
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