All language subtitles for Rent.Control.2003.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

(gentle music)

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(lively music)

(gentle music)

(cats mewing)

- Let's say we
call an ambulance.

The whole building will
find out she's dead, right?

We'll be out on the street.

How long after that till
we're back in Pottsville?

(gentle music)

You're not sold on the idea.

You have concerns.

- I'm not going to
prison over an apartment.

(horns honking)

- If you look to your
left, you got the den,

right up underneath this
upside down pyramid.

Excellent for concentration.

Right over here, you got the
wash basins. 100% porcelain.

Then in this corner right here,

you get the dining
room and the library,

which, of course,
you're more than welcome

to convert into a sewing nook.

- A sewing nook could be lovely.

- Where's the kitchen?

- Kitchen? Two blocks down
McDougall, Ray's Pizzeria.

Best mozzarella
this side of Verona.

- What do you think?

- Well, I think if
we live here a year,

we'll turn into veal.

- It's not that bad.

- You too aren't from
around here, aren't you?

- How'd you guess?

- Sixth sense.

- We're from Pottsville, Iowa.

Just drove in a couple days ago.

- Well, in that case, welcome
to Manhattan. Any questions?

- When can we move in?

- Excuse me?

- We only have a couple
things to move in.

Some blankets, a duffle bag-

- Maybe we should
talk about this.

- Honey, sweet potato,

the sooner we move in,
the sooner we can...

- I can't hear you,
your tongue's in my...

When can can move in?

- Well, as soon as
the check clears.

First and last month's rent,

$2,000 security
deposit, and you're in.

(gentle music)

- We'll get the next one.

(door clacks)

(door thuds)

(lively music)

(gentle music)

(brakes squealing)

Open call, buxom French maid.

- Come on now, put
that thing away.

We already talked about this.

We're not going on any
auditions until we get settled.

(newspaper rustles)

Come on.
(door clacks)

(newspaper rustles)

(door thuds)

(door clacks)

- Five foot eight
Southern temptress.

- Assuming you could
play a temptress,

think they'll let
you do a whole play

standing on a phone book?

- Somebody's cranky today.

(gentle music continues)

(door rumbles)

(bell dings)
(door rumbles)

Oh, hi.

- If it isn't the
actors from Iowa.

- Audrey, you look beautiful.

- Thank you, darling. How's
the apartment search going?

- Great.
- It's crappy.

- Ollie, these are my
neighbors, Holly and Calvin.

- Nice to meet you.
- How do you do?

- He doesn't speak English.

We're going to dinner at 21,
and then we're going to see...

Um, what are we seeing?

Look who I'm asking. (chuckles)

Cirque de Soleil.

- Sounds like French. (chuckles)

- See ya later.

Hey, cheer up.

Life's too short to be unhappy.

(television chattering)

(cat mewing)

(Calvin coughs)

(remote clicks)
(static crackles)

- Oh, did I ever tell
you about the time

I auditioned as a waitress
on "General Hospital"?

- Uh, yeah, actually,
yesterday we-

- They told me I was too meaty,

that I had to lose 20 pounds.
(cat mewing)

- Oh, Agatha, you really
shouldn't take those.

They're bad for your heart.

- Don't give me
that defect crap.

That's what the
doctors tell you,

'cause they don't want
you to be as skinny

as their little bitch wives.

- Um, we were thinking,
you've been so generous.

We would like to try
to help with the rent.

- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

I wouldn't think of it.

What kind of an aunt would I
be if I didn't take you in?

Ooh, look at that face,
that beautiful little face.

You remind me of me
when I was your age.

Only thinner.

One more couldn't hurt.

Couldn't hurt. Couldn't hurt.

- "Lana is pregnant again.

Her husband, Billy Fred,

just got promoted at
the rendering plant,

and the timing
couldn't be better.

Your brother Samuel
just signed a lease

for another 30 acres
of bean-growing land.

When you're done with your
little New York adventure,

he'll certainly have a place

for you supervising the pickers.

Mom."

- I got that beat.

"Hey, cabbage-for-brains,

this here manure ain't
shoveling itself,

so why don't you come
back and get to it?

Dad."

- God, was our world
ever really that small?

- Aww, they just want
what's best for us.

- No, they want us to
be exactly like them,

and it ain't gonna happen.

- It ain't gonna happen.
- No, we're gonna be actors.

- We're gonna be actors.

- We're gonna make something

of our lives.
- Yes, we're gonna make

something of our lives.
- We're gonna take risks

and think big.
- We're gonna think big,

and we're gonna-
(cat screeches)

- Holy crap!

We're gonna find an apartment.

(gentle music)

(lively music)

(lively music continues)

- My first New York apartment
was a loft in Chinatown.

(Claire chuckles)

Was right above a
cockfighting ring.

I'd see these giant
roosters going in

and little McNuggets coming out.

- Well, how'd you
find this place?

- I cheated. I'm a building
inspector for the city.

One day, I was failing a
landlord for 100-year-old pipes,

and he offered me a deal.

I overlooked the rust soup
that passes for tap water,

and he cuts me a break
on my two-bedroom.

Or should I say our two-bedroom?

- You should.

(Holly and Claire chuckling)

(glasses clinking)
- Uh, Claire, it says here,

some minor chores are required.

- Oh, I hate that word, chores.

Always makes me think of work.

I'd really rather think
of these jobs as pleasure.

- Pleasure?

- Yes. I've done a lot
of research on pleasure.

Actually, I'm sort of a,
um, scientist that way.

For instance, did you
know that pleasure

is very closely
linked with pain?

Just a fragile line
waiting to be crossed.

You didn't know that.

Or did you?

(jacket zips)(truck whooshes)

(gentle music)

(door thuds)

(gentle music)

- Nine, please.

(Dennis whispering)
(handle clacking)

What you reading?

- Me? Oh, it's, um, nothing.

- Oh, "The Temptation of Angel." I love this book!

- Yeah, some lady, she,
um, she lives here,

and she left it in the elevator,

and I was just hanging
onto it for her.

- Did you get to the part
where her lover dies?

- He what?

- Nothing.

(elevator rumbles)
(bell dings)

(door rumbles)

- He jumped down the
mine shaft, didn't he?

- No. I mean, yes,
but he's fine.

He just breaks his fibula.

- God, that is horrible.

- Um, I'm Holly,
and this is Calvin.

- Hi, I'm Dennis.

- Well, see you around.
- Okay.

- Enjoy the book.
(door rumbles)

- How are you feeling?

Curiously itchy?

(Agatha exhales)

- No.
(Vincent coughing)

- How about in the arms
and legs, a little maybe?

- No.

- Can I get a lock of your hair?

- No, stop it.

- Okay.

Who are you?

- Uh, I'm Holly. Who are you?

- This is Vincent,
the building manager.

- And the son of the owner,
so don't try to get me fired.

- Okay, then.

- Honey, could you
go in the kitchen

and get Vincent his
check so he can go?

- Sure.

(gentle music)

- I dabble in the black arts.

- Tap dancing?

(beads rattling)

(cat mews)

- I have a cauldron.

- Oh, well, we should
have a cookout.

- Here you go.

Cat's in the garbage again.

- Ugh. Richie!

I'm gonna wring your neck!

- Can I have a lock of your hair?

- Sorry, I don't
have any to spare.

- [Agatha] Oh, you
come back here!

- Bye.

(door creaks)

(door thuds)

- Freaky kids.

(horn honks)

- She pays less than a
studio. How is that possible?

- She's lived here
over 40 years.

Rent control is a
beautiful thing.

Don't worry, tomorrow,
we'll find our own place.

(kiss smacks)

And everything will be fine.

(cart rattling)

(gentle music)

(birds chirping)

(newspaper rustling)

Nothing.

(newspaper rustling)

(newspaper rustling)

Nothing.

(newspaper rustling)

(newspaper rustling)

Frightening.

(newspaper rustling)

(holly sighs)

(Calvin sighs)

- Come here.

(kiss smacks)

(Calvin sighs)
(heels clicking)

- Hi.

What's wrong?

- What's wrong?

Well, no money, no apartment, no future.

- Then you could
use some good news.

You see, I was at
the gym this morning,

doing Pilates with
my trainer Johan,

and I overheard these two girls
talking on the StairMaster.

One of them mentioned she had
an audition today, open call.

- What's the role?

- Midwestern farm
girl, five three.

- Really?

(Audrey chuckles)

- I thought you'd feel that way,

so while they were
at the juice bar,

I liberated their paper.

- This is at three o'clock.
I could still make it.

We decided we're not
going on any auditions

until we get settled.

(Calvin chuckles)

- Go to the audition.

- You think?

- Yeah, have a good time.

- You're not coming?

- No, I got to drop off
these job applications.

- But it's my first
New York audition.

I can't go alone.

This was a bad idea.
I look terrible!

- You look lovely.

- I don't even have headshots.

What am I doing here?

- Lean over for me.

Uh, it'll do.

Remember, lean forward
at least twice.

Once to fix your shoe,
once to borrow a pen.

Make eye contact, gently
bite your bottom lip,

not your top, and
play with your hair.

- Ugh, this isn't
working for me.

- Darling, this
is the Big Apple.

If you don't take a
bite, someone else will.

(women chattering)

(door thuds)

(gentle music)

(horns honking)

(upbeat music)

(door clacks)

- Thank you, Chuck.

Bye, Uncle Billy.

(door thuds)

Good luck.

- I have to go.

(Holly crying)

- [Calvin] What happened?

- Nothing! You scared me!

- Crying because I scared you?

- Why are you in the hallway?

- Nobody's home. I lost my key.

(keys jingling)

(key clicking)

(door clacks)

(bag thuds)

(door thuds)

Guess the audition went poorly?

- What if I made a mistake?

What if I don't belong here?
What if my mother was right,

and this is just
my little adventure

before I settle down
in some bean field?

And what happened
to all the cats?

- What was the firstquestion again?

- The cats! They're gone!

- Who cares?

- Usually you can't
take a step around here

without crushing
something's paw!

(door clacks)

They're not there!

- Well, maybe Agatha
took 'em for a walk.

- You don't take
cats for a walk!

(cats mewing)

(beads rattling)

Agatha!

Agatha!

Can you hear me?

Agatha!

Wake up!

(cats continue mewing)

- Think she's dead.

- Is she breathing?

- Yeah, she's breathing,
and she's dead.

- No! No!

Agatha, wake up!
- Don't, Holl, don't!

You're only gonna make it worse.

- How can I make dead worse?

- [Calvin] She's ice cold.

- Agatha, hold on,
we're gonna get help!

Where's the phone?

Where's the goddamn phone?

- In the bedroom!

(bottle clacks)

- I don't see it!

- Look by the bed!

(plant clatters)

(objects clattering)

(lid clatters)

- What the hell?

(dial whirring)

(cats mewing)

(tense music)

(handset clacks)

(cats mewing)

Let's say we call an ambulance.

The whole building will
find out she's dead, right?

We'll be out on the street.

How long after that till
we're back in Pottsville?

Well, I'm not going back
to Pottsville. Not now!

Not when I blew chunks
at my only audition.

You're not sold on the idea.

You have concerns.

Don't worry, we're not gonna hide her

in the apartment for six months.

I mean, there were two
"Weekend at Bernie's."

No one wants another.

- That's a relief. (chuckles)

- We'll just sneak her
out of the building,

and take her to the hospital.

- Excuse me?

- We'll carry her in, tell
'em she died in the car,

and then we just
fill out some forms,

call up my dad, and
the rest writes itself.

- What if someone
asks about her?

- She's on vacation.

- What if the
hospital reports it?

- The only person they report
it to is her next of kin, me.

- I'm not going to
prison over an apartment.

(cat mews)

(gentle music)

- If we don't do this,

then everything theysaid about us was true.

We're just hicks on a little New York adventure,

and that's all we'll ever be

for the rest of our
manure-shoveling,

bean-picking, pathetic lives!

(cat mews)

That's not prison, I
don't know what is.

- This kinda thing never
happens in Pottsville.

You don't think this is
a little Jeffrey Dahmer?

- We have to get her to the car without being seen.

(lid thuds)
(locks clacking)

(chest rumbling)

- Holly, you might try pushing.

- Calvin, you can help me.

(chest rumbling)

(bell dings)
(door rumbles)

- My knight in shining glasses.

What happened to you? You ran off so fast.

- Oh!

Sorry, I had an emergency.

- I figured. I followed
the trail you left.

Mwah. You guys know Dennis?

- Uh, yeah, sorta.
- Hi.

(Audrey chuckles)

- Last week, I lost
my favorite ring.

I threw it in the
garbage by mistake,

and Dennis went through
the entire building's trash

until he found it.

- Mwah, mwah, mwah.
- It was really no big deal,

I swear.
- Mwah.

Mwah.
- I mean, it was kinda

smelly and dirty.
- Mwah.

What's in the chest?

- Just clothes.

- Boy, Holl, we really
gotta get going.

- Okay, after one more kiss.

Mwah.

Bye.

See you later.
- See ya.

Okay.

Dennis? Dennis, we
really gotta get going.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- Thank you.

- Going down?
- Yes, thanks.

(handle clacks)
(door rumbling)

(elevator whirring)
(Holly sighs)

(Holly chuckles)

You got some lipstick
on your face.

- I know.

♪ Do, do do do, do
do do do, do do bop ♪

(Holly chuckles)
(bell dings)

(handle clacks)

(switch clicks)
(Holly sighs)

(handle clacks)

(door rumbles)
(body clatters)

(gentle music)

(Calvin chuckles)

(Dennis screams)

- [Calvin] Come here!

Come here!
(Dennis screaming)

(Calvin grunts)

(Dennis screams)

(Dennis screaming)

Okay, come here!

(Dennis screaming)

- [Dennis] Oh, no!

- Dennis, this isn't
what it looks like.

- Changed my mind, Holl, I don't
want the apartment anymore.

- We'll be fine, just as
soon as Dennis calms down.

What are you doing?

- I'm holding his mouth
so he doesn't scream.

- His mouth, not his whole
face! He can't breathe!

- Oh.

(body clatters)

Sorry.

(tape screeching)

- Dennis, how are you feeling?

- [Calvin] Are you hurt?

(Dennis screaming)

- You had to put the body there.

- Well, I didn't think he
was gonna wake up so soon.

- [Holly] We're trying
to calm him down,

not give him a stroke!
- I'm sorry I'm not as versed

as you in dead body etiquette!

- Well-
(Dennis mumbling)

(Dennis sobbing)

- What?

(Dennis mumbling)

- Take the tape off.

- No, he's gonna scream.

- Dennis?
- Hmm?

- If we take the tape off,
do you promise not to scream?

- Mm-mm.
- See?

- Mm-mm.
- Do you promise

not to scream?
- Mm, mm-mm.

Mm-hmm.

(Dennis sobbing)

(tape crackling)

- I know what this
must look like.

- You're gonna kill me.

- We're not gonna kill you.

- You're gonna put me
in a box with Agatha.

- Dennis-
- You don't have to.

You don't have to because
I can keep secrets.

My cousin Simon is gay,

and I've kept that
secret all this time.

- But, Dennis, we're not-

- And the only reason
that I even told you

about this secret is because,
I mean, because of...

I mean, I have
secrets I don't tell.

- Hey! Shh!

We're not gonna hurt you, okay?

Okay?
- Then why am I tied up?

(Dennis sobbing)
- Because you're not calm.

We'll untie you just
as soon as you're calm.

(Dennis whimpering)

That's better, don't you think?

- I guess.

- And that's how she ended
up on the elevator floor

instead of at Mount Sinai.

(Holly grunts)

- You don't believe us.

- It's the truth.

- I believe you.

I do, I believe you.

You needed an apartment, right?

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I, um, I have some
reading that I need to do.

- Forget it.
(Dennis yelps)

You're not going anywhere.
- Why?

- You're gonna call the police.

- No, I won't.
- Yeah.

- Okay, okay, you're free to go.

- I am?
- Yeah.

You know, we're
all friends here.

I mean, we know you'll
do what's right.

- I can leave?
- Certainly.

- Right now?
- If you like.

(chain rattles)
(door clacks)

Oh, wait, let me
just fix your tie.

Audrey's always saying how
handsome you look in a tie.

- She, um, she said what?

- Oh, no, that's wrong.
What word did she use?

Foxy.

- That's right, you guys are
friends with Audrey, aren't ya?

- Friends? (chuckles)

I gotta tell Aud that.

Okay, well, you're all
set. Don't be a stranger.

- Um, hey, what else
does she say about me?

- Who?
- Audrey.

- I don't know. Things.

But, well, you have to go.

- No, no.

I've, um, I actually
have some time.

- Oh.

Well, yesterday, she said you
look like a young Louis Gable.

(Holly chuckles)
- Really?

- [Holly] Yeah.

- Who?

- Uh, Louis Gable. You know,
Clark Gable's younger brother?

I mean, they looked
exactly alike

except that Louis had
glasses and bushy eyebrows.

- Wow.

- And that's just the beginning.

I mean, well, I
can't tell you this.

I mean, Aud would kill me.

- Go ahead.

We're all friends here, right?

Don't schedule that date
for me until Thursday

because I want to buy this
sport coat that I saw.

And it has this tie
that came with it.

Do you think that this gap
in my teeth should be fixed?

It's really bothersome.

Do you think it's too big?
- You know what?

We'll take care of Agatha first,

then we'll deal with
the Audrey setup, okay?

- Okay.
- Okay.

(elevator whirring)

- What if the janitor
looks in the bin?

- He won't.
- How do you know?

- He won't.

And even if he does,
she's in a sleeping bag,

so Rico won't even know it.

(door rumbling)

- Rico?

♪ I don't want to fight ♪

♪ It's probably too late ♪

♪ How we gonna
get back to love ♪

(gentle music)

- This is not easy for me.

You know I have
feelings for you.

I never deny that, but, um,

Rico is no one woman's man.

Understand?

Don't give me that look.

(doorbell buzzing)

(door clacks)

(door thuds)

- [Calvin] Why do we have
to use my sleeping bag?

- Because it stinks.

(door clacks)

- [Rico] What you want?

- Hi, Rico, it's Dennis,
from the elevator?

Look, we brought you trash.

- Am I supposed to be happy?

- Well-
- I'm supposed to jump

like a toad 'cause
you're bringing me trash?

Tomorrow, I bring you trash.
I dump it on your head.

Then I will be happy, huh?

Get out of my basement.

Go! Out!

- Should we, um-

- Please, leave the
trash. I love the trash.

I want to kiss the trash.

Where do I kiss it?

I love the trash.

I want to be with it.

(birds chirping)
(horn honks)

(door clacks)

(gentle music)

(can rasping)

(door thuds)

(can clattering)

- Which one is ours?

- None of them. Ours was gray.

- [Holly] Are you sure?
Thought ours was blue.

- [Calvin] Positive.
It was gray.

(door thuds)
- Well, what's the difference?

- You know the difference
between blue and gray?

- What's the difference
between the gray ones

and the blue ones?
- There is no difference.

They all come out
into the alley.

- Are you sure?

- I'm...

(kicks thudding)

(bell rings)
(fire roaring)

(door thuds)

- [Rico] What?

What?
- Rico.

Rico-
- What?

- You remember the trash
bin that we gave you?

The one you were kissing?

Well, we had something
valuable in it. (chuckles)

- 'Tis available no more.

- Uh, Holl?

We got a problem.

(Holly sighs)

- Well, I'm open to
suggestions. (chuckles)

(gentle organ music)

- Though the nature of
her death was tragic,

I believe Agatha
would rather we focus

on her enjoyment of life,
her intrepid spirit.

(Holly sobbing)
That same spirit that led her

to go white water rafting
with her beloved niece Holly

on that fateful day.

(women sobbing)

Thank you for coming.

- Thank you.
- Thank you so much.

It was a good turnout, I think.

Nice of the
morticians to sit in.

- I'm glad you could
make it, Daddy.

- Oh, honey.

How you holding up, sweetheart?

- Better, thanks.
- Good.

Can we get you anything, Rose?

- Maybe a glass of water.

- Glass of water.

- My sister never
ceased to amaze me,

but white water rafting,
that takes the cake.

- I'm so sorry.

- Oh, don't be, dear.

She died doing what she loved.

I guess.

I just hope they
find her body soon.

(Rose sobbing)
- Oh, now, hey,

they're gonna find it.

No, Rose, they're gonna find it.

(Rose continues sobbing)
No.

(traffic humming)
(horns honking)

- Gene!

- We'll make it,
Rose. We'll make it.

Now, this is a copy of the death certificate.

Now, you show it to the landlord
when you cancel the lease.

Rose already took everything
of sentimental value,

so any money you can
get for the furniture,

whatever, you keep.

- Thank you.

- Are you gonna call your
mother one of these days?

- Phone works two ways, Daddy.

- You take care of her, okay?

- I'll try, sir. It's
not such an easy job.

(door thuds)

(lively music)

(cats mewing)

(bag rustling)

- This really works.

- Cleaned out the fridge.

Top shelf, at least.

- Dennis, you're the best.

- Well, it's the least
I could do, you know,

considering I
incinerated your aunt.

And you're still hooking
me up with Audrey, right?

- Um, about that...

- You are still hooking me up with Audrey, right?

- Of course.

We, we just, you know...

Well, uh, Calvin?

- Did you guys know that
Clark Gable has a website?

- You don't say.
- Yeah, he does.

He's also got 26 fan
clubs, a museum in Ohio,

and three tax deductible
charitable foundations.

- Oh.

- The only thing he doesn't
have is a bushy-eyebrowed,

glasses-wearing
brother named Louis!

- It was Holly's idea.

- Sorry.

If it's any consolation,

we still intend to stick
to our end of the deal.

- That's what I thought.

Let's just be happy this
whole thing's finished.

(apple crunches)

(kick thuds)
(record scratches)

(gentle music)

(bottle clatters)

♪ Summer nights ♪

(door thuds)

♪ In Sag Harbor Bay ♪

- Serious Holly, playful Holly.

- I think they're both great,

but you realize we just
spent two weeks' salary,

and we haven't even
started work yet.

- [Holly] Playful
Holly, serious Holly.

- Curiously itchy?

Numbing sensation in your legs?

Vision eerily blurred at all?

(bag thudding)
What are you...

(bag continues thudding)
(Vincent groaning)

(Calvin chuckles)

You better run!

(bell dings)
(door rumbles)

(hand thuds)

Why are you still here?

- We're staying in Agatha
Washburn's apartment

while she's on vacation.

- Come again?

- Well, Agatha went to Iowa
to visit her sister Rose,

so we're watching the
place while she's gone.

(Vincent laughing)

- Why is that funny?

- Agatha on vacation?

The only time she
leaves the apartment

is to buy another cat.

Come on, you better try and do
better than that, all right?

- This a tooth?

- Yeah.

It's an ancient
Sumerian tiger tooth.

Belonged to King Petakettica.

He was really big into magic.

- It's very attractive.

(Vincent chuckles)

- I don't wear it for
the style. (chuckles)

Wear it for the unholy evil
that it unleashes. (chuckles)

- When rent comes
around, just come to me.

I'll take care of everything.

Are you coming, sweet potato?

Bye, Vincent. Nice slippers.

(Vincent chuckles)
(door rumbles)

(door thuds)

(boxes thudding)

- What the hell was that?

- What was what?

- All the "come to me, I'll
take care of everything"?

- Relax, I was just
helping our cause.

You're kinda cute when you're jealous.

- I'm not jealous.

I'm surprised.

(buttons popping)

(body thuds)

(kiss smacks)

- Surprise.

(body thuds)

(hands slapping)

(door knocking)

- Goddammit!

- Go take your pants off.

I'll be right in to
supervise the rest.

(shoes clacking)

(door clacks)

Vincent.

- Hey, I was, uh,
in the neighborhood.

- What can I do for you?

- I wanted to know if maybe you wanted to swing

by my apartment and
see my cauldron?

(foot stomping)

(body thudding)

- I'd love to, but I can't.

We're having a cocktail party,
and I have to get dressed.

(both chuckling)

- What time should
I be here? (laughs)

- Oh, um, well, it's
just a tiny thing,

and we probably don't have
another place setting,

but you understand.

- You redecorated.

- Yeah. You like?

- Oh, I like, country girl.

I like.

- Okay, well, I'll
see you later.

- Wait, I just-

(door thuds)

Ow.

- Country girl?

- What happened to all the cats?

- Calvin?

I'll be right back! I'm going to get ready for tonight!

(door clacks)

(door thuds)

- Pants.

(Calvin sighs)

Oh.

(gentle jazz music)

♪ Chasing down a rainbow ♪

♪ Don't know where
it's leading to ♪

- Good evening, my dear.

♪ Got to follow that rainbow ♪

♪ To a place where
dreams can come true ♪

- Gu, Gu, Guggenheim.

Guggenheim.

(Calvin chuckles)
(door knocking)

Come in, it's open.

(door thuds)

- Am I too early?

- No, man, you're right on time.

Hope you don't have to
use the restroom, though.

The girls have been in
there for over two hours!

- Perfection takes
time, darling.

Look at you.

(Audrey laughs)

Mwah, mwah. You look so
handsome and scholarly.

- I brought pastries.

- So you did.

(Holly clears throat)

Oh, I almost forgot.

Attention, please.

Presenting the future Academy
Award winner for Best Actress,

the toast of New
York, Los Angeles,

and the Iowa bean fields,
Miss Holly Hewitt.

- Holly who?

(door clacks)

- What do you think?

Do you like it?

- Uh.

You look so different.

- I have a gift.

- Dennis, you look so handsome.

- I brought pastries.

- So you did.

- Some more wine, my dear? No?

You know, the moon on your
pupils are like pearls

on the ocean, even though
your eyes are closed.

Just a little? Just
a little, come on.

Purse your lips.

(gentle music)

- No. Me, no thanks.

- Dennis, you're not drinking?

- No, I have a low tolerance.

Or I have a no tolerance,
really. I'm like a bubble boy.

(Dennis chuckling)
- Mm.

- Why Hewitt?

- 'Cause Holly Hepburn would raise eyebrows.

So, Dennis, tell us why
you became an elevator boy.

- Well, I'm just
earning money, really,

right now, while I,
while I go to school.

I'm getting my master's at NYU.

- Really? In what?

- Speech pathology.

- Why speech pathology?

- Well, it's a long story,
but when I was a kid,

I had a lisp, a whistle, and a
stutter all at the same time,

and when I spoke, it
sounded like a junk band.

(Holly and Dennis chuckling)

(lighter clicks)

- What? (coughing)

(gentle music)

♪ Once the skies
were always blue ♪

♪ Somehow, we made it through ♪

♪ And you could rely ♪

♪ On storm clouds passing by ♪

♪ Yes, I remember when ♪

♪ We were happy to pretend ♪

♪ Good times would never end ♪

♪ Together, we would share ♪

♪ For all in love is fair ♪

♪ Yes, I remember where ♪

- [Rico] It's picture time.

Say "cheese."

(camera snaps)
(camera whirs)

- [Audrey] You're putting me on.

- I kid you not. (sighs)

Never dated anyone
other than Holly.

We met each other
in second grade,

and then by third grade,
we became friends.

By sixth grade, we were dating,

and 10th grade we were
practically married.

- I was married.

- What?

- Yeah, at 21, to my
high school sweetheart.

- Are you still?
- No, no.

I loved him, though.

I even took a waitressing job to put him through law school.

Then he dropped out and started drinking.

Then one night, he
decided to put my face

through a plate-glass window.

(Dennis gasps)

And that's when I decided,
"It's all about me."

So I came to New York
and started over.

- Where are you from?

- Why, Paducah,
Kentucky, naturally.

- [Holly] Calvin, where's that picture of you

in "Pirates of Penzance"?

- Which one?

- [Holly] The one with
the bulging crotch.

(Audrey chuckles)

- Oh.

I'll be right back.

Looking hard, huh?

- Have a seat, darling.

Let's give the lovebirds
some time alone.

(gentle jazz music)

- Sorry about your face.

- What do you think
my mother would say

if she could see me like this?

- Probably that she
hardly recognizes you.

(gentle jazz music continues)

- I need a drink.

(Dennis gulps)

(Dennis clears throat)

♪ I've got my rainbow
wrapped around you ♪

♪ My rainbow's
wrapped around you ♪

♪ My rainbow's
wrapped around you ♪

(door thuds)

♪ You ♪

- Think Dennis is okay?

(Calvin sighs)

- Yeah, he's fine.

(Dennis retching)

(Dennis coughing)

(hand patting)

(Dennis groaning)

- I should get going.

- I'll walk you to the door.

- I love you, toilet bowl.

You are my best friend.

(Dennis groans)

(door clacks)

- Tell Holly I
had a blast, okay?

- Holly Washburn
or Holly Hewitt?

- People change.
Can't stop that.

- Yeah, well, what
if I don't keep up?

(gentle music)

- You will.

Goodnight.

(kiss smacks)

Cheer up.

Life's too short to be unhappy.

(Calvin sighs)

(traffic humming)
(water splashing)

(gentle music)

(doors clacking)

(shoe squeaks)
(table thuds)

(body thuds)

(handset clacks)

(handsets clacking)

(telephone rings)

(handset clacks)

- Lasso Enterprises.
We rope 'em in.

This is Peter.

Are you kidding?

Ooh, bring it on!

(handset clacks)

Oh, if it isn't
the family shame.

- Well, if it isn't Peter.

- Good one.

And they call you
the stupid offspring.

- I need to look at
the tenant files, okay?

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay,

um, let me think about
that for a second.

(hands slapping)
Uh, no!

I have explicit instructions
from your father

not to let you touch anything.

- Why?
- "Why?" you ask, genius?

Because you nearly got
him thrown in jail!

- See, that was an accident.

- 20 dead rabbits on an
altar is not an accident.

However, it does make for

a very interesting
building inspection.

And speaking of
building inspections-

- I know, I'm taking care of it!

- Do you think you can get rid
of the bunnies by tomorrow?

- Let me see the files!

- Okay, what part of "uh-uh"
don't you understand?

Back off.

- Okay.

I see how this is going.

- Oh, do you?
- Yeah.

So let me tell you something.

I got another
trick up my sleeve.

- I'm nervous.

Thank God the freak is gone.

- Let me see the files!

(Peter yelps)
(bodies thudding)

(Vincent grunts)
- Get off of me, you mad cow!

(both grunting)

You are Shamu!

You are a prehistoric primate!

You are a retard!

God, you uncouth man!
(Vincent grunts)

No, you're mine!

You can't have it!

No!

- Get off me, bitch!

- Give me-
- Stop!

(Peter yelps)

(elbow thudding)
(Peter groans)

(Vincent screams)

(Peter sobs)

I thank you.

(Peter sighs)
See ya!

(Peter panting)

- What? Give me some ice!

(water splashing)

- How do I look?

- Stuffed.

- Open call, five
foot three, blonde.

This is it, Dennis.

Aww, cheer up. You'll
get her next time.

- Holly, there's not
gonna be a next time.

I mean, let's face
it, I blew it.

I mean, she's out of my league anyway.

She deserves much more than me.

She deserves him.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- You look lovely,
my dear. Mwah, mwah.

- As do you.

- Oh, that must have
been a strong martini.

- My shift starts in an
hour. I'm gonna leave now.

(Audrey chuckles)

- George, this is Holly,

and that's Calvin
in the adorable hat.

- I'll have a coffee.

- George is a producer.

- Really?

Well, I have to get going.
Gonna be late for my audition.

- You're an actress?

- Yeah, I'm up for a small part

in an off-Broadway play,
southern temptress. (chuckles)

But I don't think I
have enough sex appeal.

- Oh, I really don't
think that's a problem.

Why don't you call
me? We'll have lunch.

See what pans out.

- I'd love that.

- Aren't you late
for your audition?

- Yeah, I have to get going.

- I should be running
along as well.

Let me walk you out.

I'll page you.

(bell jingles)
(Audrey sighs)

- Guess you don't
want your coffee, huh?

(bell jingles)

- So what time do
you get off work?

(gentle music)

- So how do you know George?

- A friend set us up.

- Can I ask you a
personal question?

- No, I'm not a prostitute.

- Wasn't the question.

(Calvin sighs)

Yeah, it was.

(bell dings)

- You see, the men I date,
we have an understanding.

I treat them well, they treat
me well, everybody's happy.

- You don't have a
problem with that?

- With what?

Not having to work, custom-made
dresses, nice apartment?

(lock clacking) (door clacks)

You wanna see it?

(gentle music)

(door thuds)

(bag clatters)

- This place is definitely
nicer than Agatha's.

(bottle spraying)

- Thanks. A friend
helped me out.

Have a seat, country boy.

I'm about to tell you
the secret of New York.

Not there. That's a Gucci!

(Audrey chuckles)

It's very simple.

Get what you want, you enjoy it,

and don't worry about the rest.

See, I used to be like you.

- How do you mean?

- Selfless.

I followed my husband around
like you follow Holly.

- I don't follow Holly.

- If Holly didn't come to
New York, would you have?

What I'm saying is, you
don't have to be a follower.

You're in New York now.

(gentle music)

You can lead.

- How?

(gentle music)

- This is not easy for me.

You know I have feelings for
you, I never denied that.

But Rico, (sighs)

Rico is no one-woman's man.

Maybe I give too
much. It's my fault.

Maybe we should spend some
time apart, see other people.

Why the long face?

It's okay.

(bodies thudding)
(Calvin groans)

(Audrey moans)

(bodies thudding)
(Calvin groans)

(table rattling)

(Dennis sighs)

(Dennis sighs)

- [Holly] I love New York!

- [Dennis] Ow!

I guess you got the job.

- That's right!

You're looking at sexy
background girl number three!

- That's great! Congratulations.

(book thuds)
Ow!

(Holly clapping)
(door rumbles)

I really shouldn't.

I mean, I still-
(door clacks)

- Oh, one drink won't kill ya!

Oh, maybe it will. (chuckles)

Calvin! Oh, Dennis,
you should've seen me!

I mean, I did everything right.

I leaned forward twice,
I kept my shoulders back,

my boobs out, and I
sucked in my stomach.

- Was it an audition
or a checkup?

- I took my bite,
Dennis, and I prevailed!

I mean, this is a new era. This
is the era of Holly Hewitt.

Today is...

No, that's not good.

(mysterious music)

(Dennis whimpers)

(body thuds)

(siren wailing)

(buckle clattering)

(footsteps pattering)

There's no one here.

There's something in her shirt.

Well, go get it.

- I'd rather not.

(mysterious music)

- Ugh!
- What is it? What is it?

What is it?

- No.

- Is that...

(door banging)

- Calvin?

(door clacks)

Vincent.

- And so it ends.

- Vince, this really
isn't a good time.

- Terribly sorry.

Tell me, when is it a
good time to get evicted?

- What do you...

What is that?

- Oh, you know,
funny you should ask.

You see, this is the
original rental contract

for Agatha Washburn
for this apartment.

- Oh.
- There's her signature

right there, do you see it?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- Oh, that's-
- We see with our eyes.

Take a look over here where
it says "Next of kin."

I don't have my glasses on,

so could you tell me right
here, what exactly does it say?

- Rose Washburn?

- Rose Washburn.

Agatha's sister from Iowa.

- You didn't, uh...

- Call her? No, no, no.

How could I call her?

That number, that's gotta
be like 40 years old, right?

- Yeah.
(Vincent chuckles)

I tell you what, the
operator was quite helpful.

Oh, God, Rose and I, we
talked for a long time!

We talked about the weather,

we talked about how
to poach an egg,

but, oh god, she said
the funniest thing!

You're never gonna believe
this, about Agatha! (laughs)

- That she's dead?

- Yeah, how'd you guess?

- Well, (sighs) Rose is crazy.

I mean, next time, ask her
to put Liberace on the phone.

- I might do that. In
the meantime, get out!

- You're making a big mistake.

- You think so?

How about getting
Agatha out here?

We'll clear the
whole thing up, huh?

- Okay, um...

- [Vincent] Hmm?

- Hold on a sec.

(door thuds)
(chain rattles)

- No!
- I'm begging you!

- No, absolutely not.
- Dennis, don't let me lose

the apartment, not now.

Not when things
are going so well!

- Sorry, life is full
of disappointments.

- Fine.
- Fine.

(somber music)

- If I don't do this,

then everything theysaid about me was true.

I'm just a hick on a
little New York adventure,

that's all I'll ever be,

for the rest of my
manure-shoveling,

bean-picking, pathetic life.

Don't send me back to
Pottsville, Dennis.

I'd rather go to prison.

(chain rattles)

(door clacks)

Sorry to keep you waiting.

Please, come in.

- What the hell for?

- I have to tell you something.

Something you didn't know.

- What, you think I'm an idiot?

This some sort of trick?

- No. No.

No more tricks.

It's time for the truth.

(door creaks)

- All right.

The door stays open.

(door rumbling)

(ice cubes rattling)

- Iced tea?

Okay.

Agatha's not dead.

- Uh-huh.

- She only wants people
to think she's dead.

- And why would she want that?

- Because of her, her state.

A couple weeks ago, Agathabegan to have problems,

you know, health problems.

It began with an itching
in her arms and legs.

- Really?

- Yeah, and the
itching got so bad,

she was in constant pain.

The doctors, they
didn't know. (crying)

I'm okay, I'm okay.

About two days later,
she lapsed into a coma,

and when she came
out the next day,

she had these terrible tremors,

and, and she had no
feeling in her legs.

Plus, her vision
was eerily blurred.

She's been bedridden ever since.

- Bedridden?

Where?

- Coming?

(door clacks)

Agatha?

Agatha, are you awake?

Agatha?

Hello, how you feeling?

Oh, okay, are your
eyes still hurting you?

I'll turn down the lights.

(switch clicks)

There you go.
That's better, huh?

(Holly chuckles)

Who's he? Oh, he,
he's the doctor.

He's here for your checkup.

Yeah, he's here
for your checkup.

Oh, okay, okay. Okay,
he'll go, he'll go.

Okay. Yeah, oh,
oh, love you too.

Oh yeah, that's a good hug.

Okay, all right.

Okay, love you too.

Okay, yeah.
- What have I done?

- [Holly] All right,
I'll be back. Okay.

We should go.

- Yeah, I made a mistake.

Oh my god, Agatha,
watch your head!

- Okay, okay, gotcha.
Okay, gotcha there.

Yeah, almost had a
boo-boo. (laughs)

Okay, all right. There.

Make sure you're all snug.

(mysterious music)

In there? There you go.

Feel better? Okay?

All right, yeah, you're okay.

Oh! Calvin!

Calvin, um, look who's up?

(tense music)

(body thuds)
Calvin!

Calvin! Calvin.

Oh, he does this all the
time. Low blood sugar.

- Here, tea. It's pre-sweetened.

- Oh, thanks.

Uh, Calvin, Calvin,
honey, wake up, wake up.

Okay, (chuckles) there you go.

- [Calvin] Could've
sworn that I...

Oh god.
- No, Calvin!

(head thuds)
Oh! Oh.

Oh, oh, that
could've killed you.

Okay, you okay?

Okay, baby, hi. Sweet potato?

Oh, no.

Is your head okay?

Sweetie, come on. You're okay.

Come on.

Uh.

(body thuds)

- Hi, Vincent.

(mysterious music)

(Holly sighs)

- To Vincent, who so generously agreed

to wait till tomorrow
to call the police.

To Dennis, who
sacrificed his job,

his tuition, to help a friend.

(mugs clinking)

And to Agatha, quite a sport.

- If only I got here sooner.

- You couldn't have known.

- You don't understand.

Should've been here.

I should've come straight home.

I shouldn't have...

(Calvin sighs)

- Shouldn't have what?

(somber music)

Why?

- I was just trying to keep up.

(door thuds)

(photograph ripping)

- Baked us some brownies,
some comfort food.

(tray clatters)
(Dennis groans)

Except when they're
scalding your hands.

(photograph ripping)

What are you doing?

- Difference does it make? I'm
not gonna need these in Iowa.

(photograph rustles)

I'm sorry.

- It's okay.

It's just a job.

- Not the job. For
breaking my promise.

I'm sorry about Audrey.

- Forget it.

I never had a chance anyway.

(photographs ripping)

(gentle music)

- What does he mean keep up?

Keep up with who?
(Dennis sighs)

I am the same person
I've always been.

(match scratches)

(gentle music continues)

It's funny, after
everything I've done,

Calvin is the one
that belongs here.

He's the real New Yorker.

- Well, in all fairness,

you're probably both
going to prison.

(Dennis chuckles)

- Why can't all
guys be like you?

- We drew straws, I lost.

- No, you're smart,
you're funny.

You always touch your glasses

when you're nervous,
which is so cute.

You're caring.

Audrey doesn't deserve you.

(Holly crying)

I'm sorry. It's not you.

- We have more brownies left.

(gentle music continues)

(lighter clicks)

- This isn't who I am, Dennis.

This isn't who I want to be.

Maybe I'm changing too fast.

Maybe I scared Calvin off.

I can't lose him.

Without Calvin, no
success is worth anything.

- Does he know that?

(gentle music continues)

- [Calvin] Give
this lady a call.

(door thuds)
(hand tapping)

(engine rumbling)

- [Dennis] Where you going?

- I don't know.

(door clacks)

- Can we talk?

(door creaks)

(door thuds)

I'm not sophisticated.

I'm not cosmopolitan
or anything like that.

I'm just a guy from Iowa.

I can't, I can't explain to
you why I did what I did.

It's, it's so stupid.

But, um, (sighs)

I thought I was losing you.

I felt like you didn't
want me anymore.

But I need you to
know that I'm still

the same person that I was.

I'm still terrified of failure.

I'm still determined
to help you succeed.

I'm still in love
with the same girl

that I fell in love with
when I was in second grade.

(gentle music)

(Calvin sighs)

I'm so sorry.

I need you in my life.

Holly, I'm begging you.

You gotta give me
another chance.

(gentle music continues)

(Calvin sighs)

(Dennis and Holly chattering)

- Oh, look who's up.

(pen tapping)

(Dennis sighs)

- What's going on?

- Oh, our salvation,
that's what.

Dennis here has provided us

with some interesting
information.

- Young Lasso
ropes dead rabbits.

I don't get it.

- Yesterday, Vincent
said he wouldn't call

the police until today.

Why?

- Christian spirit?

- Because today,
at four o'clock,

is the annual
building inspection.

(head thuds)
Ow!

And the last thing that
Vincent wants is to end up

in the newspaper again.

- Have some coffee. The hicks
are about to make a comeback.

Right there?
- Yeah.

- Oh.

♪ Do do bop bop
do do, do do da ♪

♪ Do do do do, da do da ♪

- Iggy. Iggy, I need you to
get up and work the door, okay?

Inspector's coming, got it?

You got it? Good.

(gentle music)

♪ Do do bop bop, do do ♪

- Iggy? Iggy, Iggy.

The door, okay? The
inspector's coming.

You got it? You all right?

You got it?

We're good? Okay.

(tires squealing)

(tires screeching)

(tire thuds)

(taxi driver faintly speaking)

- [Peter] Are you retarded?

Go back to driver's training!

Come on!
- Hey, up yours!

(door thuds)
Watch the paint!

(tires squealing)
- Hello?

Yo.
(door banging)

- Iggy, the door.
(fingers snapping)

Yeah.

(Vincent snorts)

Okay.

(door clacks)

(Peter sighs)

- Claire.
(door thuds)

Door.
(fingers snapping)

Get the door.

(Peter sighs)

- I got it, I got it.
(door clacks)

- Claire, this is Vincent.

- Beautiful day,don't you think?

- Painfully beautiful.

- What are you doing here?

- I'm your father's assistant.

I go wherever he goes.

- You mean...

- Oh, yes, he's coming to
oversee the building inspection.

Let's hope nothing goes horribly, horribly wrong.

(door clacks)

- Here's your briefcase, sir.

- Thank you, Ken.

(door clacks)

(door thuds)

- Mr. Lasso, sir, everything's
fine inside. No problems.

- Where's the demon seed?

- Oh, inside, sir.

- Well, then we got
ourselves a problem.

- Thank you, sir.

(Peter coughing)

(door clacks)

- Hello, Father.

- Well, that's what four DNA tests say.

I ain't so sure myself.

She your inspector?

- Yes, sir.

- How do, ma'am? Beautiful
day, don't you think?

Okay, kid, now's your
chance to come clean.

I ain't gonna find
no surprises, right?

- No, sir.
- No little dead critters

with candles sticking
out of their asses?

No shrunken voodoo hall dick?

- No, sir.

- Good, 'cause if I
do, you are cut off,

and I ain't joking this time.

- Okay.

- Here, your mother
baked you some cookies.

Well, ma'am, time's a-wasting.

Let's get this show on the road.

After you.

(door knocking)

(door rattles)
(Peter groans)

(stick clatters)

(stick tapping)

- Safety glass safe.

- The sprinklers work too.

I found that out
by accident when...

Of course, that's
neither here nor there.

(elevator whirring)

(gentle music)

(elevator whirring)

(pen tapping)

- EG Manufacturing, very
nice, very nice, very nice.

- Well, it's a Lasso
property, ma'am.

We don't make 'em any other way.

- And what's behind
that restricted area?

- Uh, that is the garbage room,

and it is also the
janitor's quarters.

- [Peter] Ooh.

- [Calvin] Pardon me. Excuse me.

(hand patting)

(door clacks)

(door thuds)

- What the hell was that?

- The janitor.

- Wearing a cloak?

- He's not from around here.

- Uh, yes, moving right along.

Serial number 821 15 89.
(people humming)

Do you hear something?

- Hear something? No.

- I hear something.
(people humming)

- It's like a hum.

(people humming)

(Vincent laughing)

- The hum! (laughs)

Of course I hear the hum.

- Do you?
- Yeah, you can't miss it.

I'll be right back.

(people continue humming)

- Did you write down the hum?

(people humming)

(door thuds)

- Master, thank Zob you're here.

(people continue humming)

(doorknob clicks)

(people continue humming)
(doorknob rattling)

- What are you guys doing? Huh?

You guys are evicted.
(door banging)

Come on, get outta here.

- Master, what's
gotten into you?

(door banging)

- [Claire] Mr. Lasso,
is there a problem?

- Just a minute!

I'm serious, guys, all right?

(door banging)
I want you to grab the candles

and your cadaver, and
get the hell outta here.

- We can't, we're in
the middle of a spell

that makes the building
manager do whatever we want.

- What is it that you
want, huh? What is it?

- Funny you should ask.

(door banging)

- [Leonard] So you, uh,
ever been to Lubbock?

(door bangs)

- Dennis wants his job back.

- If it's not too much trouble,

I'd like the job-
- Look, it's done, okay?

What else?

- We want you to agree not
to evict us, call the police,

or pester us for at
least three months.

(door banging)
That'll give us time

to find a new apartment.
(doorknob rattling)

- I agree. That's
plenty of time.

- How do we know
you'll keep your word?

- Because I promised.
What's the problem?

- We need collateral.

(Vincent gasps)

- No.

(blade snaps)

- Looks like we're not
locked out after all.

- [Leonard] Did you
bring my checkbook?

- Of course.

- Fine, good. So we
have a deal, right?

So if we just get rid of the...

(mysterious music)

(door rattling)

- Little help?

- [Peter] With pleasure.

(door rattling)

(Peter grunting)

- Thank God you're here!

Somebody help!

I was climbing on
top of the bin,

and I was reaching
for the light bulb,

and I must've lost my balance.

- What light bulb?

- The, uh...

Not light bulb. Ceiling.

I was reaching for the, uh...

Ow! Oh my god!

Ow! Oh, my knee,
it must be broke!

The agony!

(Vincent groans)

- I don't understand.

How could she just...

- Can I help you?

- Rico!

Give me back my aunt, right now!

- If you have ants, maybe
you need exterminators.

- You got five seconds, Rico,
to tell us where she is.

- You know, you're sick.

- You're sick.

- No, you're sick.

You need to see a doctor.
- Give me back my aunt!

- You know, I just woke
up. I have no newspaper.

Where is my news?
Where is my news?

- Make it quick.

- No, no, no, no, no, no no!
- Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Okay, I take her.

- [Holly] Where is she?

- I take her because I love her.

She's my ocean.

I am her boat.

Without my ocean,
I cannot float.

- That's disgusting.

Tell us where she is.

- Where she is where
she wants to be.

- What's that mean?
- She wants to be

where she wants to be, where
you will never find her.

She is where I put her.
- What?

- She is where you'll
never, ever, ever find her.

- She's in the incinerator.

(Rico groans)

(door clacks)

(Dennis screaming)

- [Dennis] Oh, that's wrong.

- Get off me.
- All right, all right.

(door thuds)

- Come on.

This is ridiculous.

Oh my...

I do not get paid
enough for this.

Get off me.
- All right, all right.

Let's check these water pipes.

- All right, get out of the way.

- Sorry, sir.
- Idiot.

- [Claire] Nice.

(clipboard thuds)

(pole tapping)

Not bad.

(pole tapping)

Mm.

(gentle music)

Oh, I don't know.

(pole tapping)
I don't know.

(Claire humming)

- Hey, psst.

- Hey, so did you get everything you wanted?

- And then some. You
were perfect, Claire.

- How can we ever thank you?

- Oh, thank me?

Thank you, dear, for sending
me those lovely boarders.

(Calvin chuckles)

- I knew you'd love 'em.

- Mm.

All right, let's get
this show on the road.

I need to get home. I have a
few chores to take care of.

Excuse me, boys.

(bodies thudding)
(Dennis yelps)

(button clacks)
(bell rings)

(fire roaring)

- No! Stop!

No! No!

Agatha!

Agatha!

Agatha.

(gentle music)

- "Midwestern farm girl
exudes charm and innocence."

I should go for this.

- Ah, I don't
know. Keep reading.

- "Jenny, 22, lives
in rural Minnesota.

Loves horses, men
with pickup trucks,

and stands a healthy
five foot eight."

(door rumbles)
- Oh.

Where's Dennis?

(Dennis grunting)

- Are you sure you don't
need some help with that?

- No, no. I'm positive I got it.

(Dennis grunts)

Where do you want it?

- Right over there is good.

(Dennis grunts)

You're reading "Little Women"?

- Oh, this?

Um, no, actually, um, this
girl dropped it this morning.

- Oh, and you're just
holding it for her, right?

- Right.

Why, have you read
this book before?

- Yeah, like, five times.

- Really?
- I'd read it again, I just...

I have too much schoolwork.

- You're in school?

Um, what are you studying?

- Uh, speech therapy.

I'm starting my master's
at NYU next month.

- That's great.

That's great.

Um.

Well, okay.

- Um, well, I mean, you don't
have to go just yet, do you?

- No. No, actually,
I have some time.

(gentle music)

- Ugh, how can you eat those?
(door clacks)

- Pork rinds are good for you.

- [Audrey] One more kiss. Mwah.

(kiss smacks)
(door thuds)

- Hey, good morning, tenants!

Oh, today's the
first of the month,

so if you could drop off
the rent check today,

that'd be great, all right?

- Okay. Yeah, we'll do that tonight.

- Awesome.
- Yeah.

(Vincent chuckles)

- Hey! Have either
one of you seen Rico?

- Rico? No, no, mm-mm.

- I got my score from the
inspection today, I got a C.

- That's good.

- Good? I shoulda gotten an A!

I mean, how was I supposed
to know incinerators

have been illegal in
Manhattan since 1980, huh?

- Sorry.
(Calvin chuckles)

- Yeah.

Don't worry about it.

Lucky for me, the thing
wasn't even working.

(Vincent chuckles)

That retard Rico forgot
to hook up the gas line.

(Vincent laughing)

That moron.

- No.

(lively music)

♪ Chasing down that rainbow ♪

♪ That's what we're gonna do ♪

- Still hot?

I have AC up as far as she goes.

I know what you want.

(bag rustling)

Better?

Wait till we get to Vegas.

We'll find a nice chapel
with very good ventilation.

♪ I've got my rainbow
wrapped around you ♪

♪ My rainbow's
wrapped around you ♪

♪ My rainbow's
wrapped around you ♪

♪ My rainbow's
wrapped around you ♪

♪ You ♪

(gentle music)

(lively music)

(lively music continues)

(lively music continues)

(gentle music)

(gentle music)

(gentle music continues)

(gentle music continues)

(mysterious music)

(mysterious music continues)

(gentle music)

(gentle music)

♪ Do do bop bop do do, do do da ♪

♪ Do do do do, da do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do, do do bop ♪

♪ Do do do do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do, do do ♪

(mysterious music)

(lively music)

♪ Do do do do, do
do do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do, do do do do
do ♪ ♪ Do do do do do do da ♪

♪ Do do do do do do,
do do do do do bop ♪

♪ Do do do do do,
do do do bop da ♪

♪ Do do do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Bop ♪

(gentle music)