Original subtitles

Hi, welcome back. I'm Dr. Tess Coleman, and this is Rebelling with Respect.

Today on the podcast, we are talking about a relationship

dynamic that is very close to my heart.

Grand co-parenting. When my daughter Anna chose to

become a single mom, it changed our family forever.

Ryan, Clophis, recording. Sorry.

As a grandma, I was able to step up and help her.

Harper, this is your 30-minute warning that we're leaving for school.

Harp, this is now your 20-minute warning.

10 minutes. Yes, confirm the recording sessions,

but know that I know she can sell out more than the Greek.

And yes, I know how many seats there are.

Harper, I really want to respect your space, but

I'm curious as to why you're not out here yet.

You have five minutes. Being someone that your loved one

can lean on is the most important relationship there is.

Ryan, I'm getting so good at this. No. No, no, no. Oh, it didn't record.

Hi, mom. Now is not a great time.

I know, but I finished my podcast early, so I'm offering to do drop-off.

No, it's okay.

I've got everything under control. Harper, you had to 10 minutes ago.

Prepare to be triggered. These waves are unreal. I love our lives.

Yo, are we skipping first period? Oh, shoot. We gotta go.

Barely. I made your favorite lunch. How was Pickleball yesterday? Did you beat him?

We say annihilated. Mom, I told you I could take her. I know, sweetheart. But I saw in

your stories that you were working at the studio late, and so I decided to take her.

You know, it would be healthy for you to unfollow me. And I work late all the time.

I can still take her. Anna, let's pause and reframe.

When you decided to be a single mom, I told you I would

support you 100%. Well, this is me supporting you 100%.

Okay, you know what? I'm coming too.

We can both do drop-off this morning. Mom. No, go on. You can go. Just let them.

Okay, you're not going. Mom. You're gonna go.

You're not. Nobody's gonna go. I'm gonna go.

So, what's up, kiddo? Nothing. Okay, spill it.

All right, my new lab partner is the absolute worst.

She's the new girl here for the year.

I mean, she thinks she's so much better than

everyone because she's British, which she has to remind you of every five seconds,

like no one's ever been from England before.

So, my dad opened his third restaurant in Paris.

And that's how I met my French boyfriend, Philippe Henry. Oh, Philippe Henry.

He's French and modern. We've seriously been

to Paris Fashion Week and a winter scald at me.

Seriously? What's Paris like? Oh, it's lovely.

I go all the time. Ignore the British girl

after this year. You won't have to see her anymore. Nice advice. You're a therapist.

Well, I'm not a therapist. I'm her grandma. All right. Well, this has been real.

Please drive away like you don't know me. Make your choices. You are so lame.

Blame. Are you ready for laboratory today?

Shut your mouth. Fun bonus round today. Never trust an atom. Why?

Because they make up everything. You're all day, Pope.

You're supposed to put your goggles on before we start.

The goggles are giving million. Yeah, we're not like minions.

So, no, thank you. But they're perfect for you.

It's like the Revolutionary War was for nothing.

Today, remember, these are dangerous chemicals.

Maybe we should use not dangerous chemicals.

How about you do your actual share of the work instead of doodling?

It's called designing. The measurements have to be precise.

This experiment is so simple. In the UK, we did this in primary school.

The only reason people think you're smart is because of your obnoxious accent.

At least people think I'm clever. What's that supposed to mean?

You're smart. Figure it out.

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Oh, no.

That was not precise.

That was not precise at all!

Oh. Principal Walden?

I don't know, Mom. I don't know why the principal called me.

But I'm here, so you don't need to come.

You know what? I can't find what I was going to tell you about.

I have to call you. Oh, sorry.

It's totally my fault.

No, no, no. I wasn't looking where I was going.

Oh!

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

Yeah, I don't know how to tell this thing off.

Yeah, I'm not sure either.

I think... Is it off?

I think you've got it, yeah.

Oh, thank you.

No problem.

Thank you.

My daughter just started here, and I admit I'm quite lost.

Would you happen to know where the chemistry lab is?

This is serious.

Someone could have been injured.

I'm sure it was just an accident.

It seems to me in this understanding, Harper seems so lovely.

Oh, Lily seems so genuine and kind.

Wow, I certainly never had two parents come in here and be this attractive.

I'm a detentive.

Lily and I are definitely going to reflect on how to do better.

This is all Harper and I are going to think about.

We're very, very committed, especially as a single-parent household.

Oh, us too. We're single-parent.

Great.

I mean, I'm a single-parent.

Great. Yes.

Same. Me too.

Single.

Single-parent. Guilty.

I'm single too. Should we meet up?

Perhaps our daughters should get to know each other.

Maybe like Wednesdays after six, get a little wine, talk about these badass kids.

Harper would really like that.

Oh, dinner?

Dinner sounds perfect.

I'm on it.

Petit trois? Yes.

Gonna have a table for two private.

In the back.

Do you guys have any allergies?

No.

No, no allergies.

Okay, you came here early.

Spill it.

There's just no time.

Bachelorette party, dance rehearsal, final

fitting, rehearsal lunch, and oh, my wedding.

You have a lot on your plate.

Big day, deep breath.

There's so much to do before Sunday.

Let us know how we can help.

Maybe someone could help me memorize my wedding vows.

How about this?

I'll help you.

I, Anna, take you, Eric, a man that I have been dating for six months,

but might uproot my entire life and move to London,

where we have no family and an avocado costs $11.

Perhaps you should add something about my undying patience for a teenage rebellion.

It was put on by the avocado.

Oh, that wasn't about you.

It was actually about my mom's other British fiance.

She's a comedian today, just today, now.

Right, Harper?

I have been practicing our first dance.

Wait till you see what I am cooking.

Ooh, I see what you did there.

I missed you since yesterday.

Ew.

I think we can all guess who it might be about.

Hello!

I had my pastry chef make sticky toffee pudding pavlova for the bake sale.

Just what every teenager loves, pavlova.

Agreed. Teenagers these days, sophisticated parlors.

Well, this pastry chef was up at 4 a.m. baking old-fashioned chocolate chip cookies

from scratch with no staff.

Four hours for cookies? I think we need to get you the stuff.

They just needed to cool.

Stand up straight. Good posture.

And do you know how bad this is for you?

Seriously, eat this.

Say, thanks.

I saw that, Harper.

Just trying to keep some change on hand.

Hi. Well, we wouldn't want to be off schedule in it.

Hi, Lil. It's Lily.

Lily, back seat.

Can't Grahams just take me?

No, this will be good bonding for everyone.

I bond best with Lil E when we're not around

each other and I don't have to look at her face.

I love sitting next to you. It reminds me that I'm amazing.

All right.

All right.

I got you.

You got me.

Good morning.

We're ready to go. Good morning.

Car is all set. Up the coast. Real one.

Yeah?

Yeah. Yeah? What do you think?

I'm not saying I don't not want to go on the trip.

I'm just saying that Anna's wedding has put me behind

with my patients, which has been very disruptive.

And, and of course, they keep adding dates to my book tour, which,

you know, is not out of my control.

And I'm just saying I need a little time.

Look, we're trying to hear you. Just try and hear us.

Oh, no. I hear you trying to pull me away from my family and my friends.

I mean, who even gets to surf before school in London?

You can surf on the river Thames.

Really? No, you dipstick.

Girls.

It's a city.

Okay, girls. Girls. It's our decision.

Eric and I will do what's right for the family.

Family?

Yes, this family.

Don't say it like that.

That sounds really good.

Don't you tell me what to say and how to say.

How about relax? Don't be so dramatic.

Lily, stop gaslighting.

What? You don't even know what that means.

I don't want to look at your face any more.

You know what that means, right?

I think I know what it means.

Yeah, I know you do.

Max, please wipe yourself with water.

For the bank sale today,

every payball must pay a full free option.

And every free option... Please don't slam the... ...a full free option.

A red dot free option.

Well, at least we don't have to bring them to our immigration interview tomorrow.

Don't be stressed.

They'll come around.

Yeah, let them take all the time they need.

Oh, he sounds great. I'll be back in a bit.

Thank you.

Oh, send those to the tour manager, please.

Yeah, okay.

Um, so I want to do that.

You know, when we come in here at the midnight, I got the keys to the studio.

How's it going?

Oh, good morning.

Actually, literally not.

It's a bad morning.

It's a very bad morning.

Not for me personally, but for you.

Why? What happened?

Trevor dumped Ella.

And he already released a song about it.

Ella!

Oh.

Yeah, and he dumped her in a text.

Yeah, I got this.

Toxic icon.

Okay, so Trevor wrote a song,

but I'm sure it's not as bad as you think.

It's called Better Than The Last One.

It's about me.

Okay, but that title, it could be about anyone.

It says parentheses, Ella.

Let's just focus on the songs that you're going to perform on Saturday.

Performing.

I can't sing those songs.

I wrote them about Trevor.

I put my heart and soul into them.

No.

A 44-year-old Dutch music producer wrote those songs.

Where's your head?

I can't even stop moving my body.

My chest is just y'all raising a kiss.

What is that?

Did you wear that from Oprah?

Join the environmental club.

I'm Oprah. We have the best cookies in town.

Welcome to Great Sunset Bridge, Baker.

Shouldn't these be more prominently featured?

Bon Appétit literally profiled my dad's restaurant for these patients.

I think they're nice and prominent over here.

They're gourmet.

They're soggy-bottomed.

You know what?

I think I see the perfect spot for yours.

Dude, goals work rams.

Come on.

You know what?

I think I know the perfect place to put this.

You wouldn't dare.

Perfect.

Nice caramelization.

Oh.

Who started the food fight?

Congratulations, you two.

You just got everybody in here in school suspension.

Is this key lime pie?

Yeah, I baked it fresh this morning.

Well, you gotta take me to the emergency room

because I'm very allergic to key lime pie.

Is this you?

Oh.

That's not supposed to be in there.

Was it for Pink Slip?

I saw them at the Troubadour last year.

Could I sing your song this weekend?

Oh no, you have way better stuff than something I wrote.

I wrote that after I left Pink Slip anyway.

Okay.

I got this.

Yes, you got this.

Opening your world tour at the well turn is a big show for you.

For the both of us.

The girls are struggling with this transition.

And just take it from a parent who has been in your shoes.

Hey, I know.

That's between losing Lily's mom and moving here.

Yes, and being ripped away from the home she cropped in.

Oh, I'm sorry. Are we talking about Lily or about Harper?

Harper?

Lily?

Hey, what's going on?

Darling?

No one's hurt.

I went to the store.

Please, let me just handle this.

Anna, there's been an incident at school between the girls.

It was really bad.

What bad? How bad?

Oh.

I got this. Girls, apologize to each other now, please.

Oh, honey, forced apologies is never a way to resolve conflict.

But we need to make space for them to express how they feel.

Harper, how do you feel?

I feel... sorry.

And Lily, how do you feel?

I feel... sorry, Tim.

That's great.

Great.

Sorry that my future stepsister is a comedy twitch.

My future stepsister is a shallow idiot.

New plan. No more holding space for feelings.

You two are going to have a lovely time at my bachelor tonight.

You're going to get along because we're a family and families love each other.

And for that, Harper, just for that look, you

two earned yourself a sleepover at Graham's.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Why am I the punishment? I'm the fun one. I have four games.

Mom, I have four cheeses.

And you're going to braid each other's hair in

a non-cultural, appropriating way and like it.

What is pajese?

It's a game.

You move around the board, you shake the dice.

Remember the sound of the dice?

Oh, it's amazing.

You get these dice and you shake them in your hand.

And then you move around the board.

It's really fun.

I also have boggle.

You stay on your side and I'll stay on mine.

Gladly.

Harper, look, I know you think I don't get it, but I do.

And it's still just going to be you and me.

If you go to London, I'm staying here with Grahams.

She said it was cool.

She what?

Hey, Anna, did you remove me as Harper's secondary contact?

Did you tell Harper that she could stay here

with you if we decided to move to London?

Are you serious right now?

Whoa, are you serious?

Okay, okay.

What is serious is that you and Eric need to keep the girls in Los Angeles.

Lily, just need some guidance.

The only guidance I need from you is to show me to the other bathroom.

I'm very sorry, Lily.

I didn't... You don't know anything about what I need or how I feel.

Or the fashion school back home that I want to go to.

Yep, just you and me, Mom.

Great.

Welcome, everyone, to the bachelorette party of our girl, Anna!

Mom, for real?

What did you just... Haven't changed.

Not a good thing.

Oh, so funny.

Oh, I remember that six pack.

Yeah, who is that?

So handsome.

That is Jake.

Your mom's first love.

And her first ride on a motorcycle.

I like to ride in Chase's motorcycle.

Jake also had a thing for Tess.

For Gramps?

Alright, okay.

Enough humiliation for tonight.

Baby, I need you a plate.

Here you go. You're too young to be sad. Come on.

Being young is overrated, Mom.

Eat will be fine.

You suppose.

Lily, mind if I join you?

You know, Anna lost her father around the same age that you lost your mother.

And then she had to deal with my wedding to Ryan.

Cool.

And then you add to that the complications of moving.

I'm here for you.

Sincerely.

With all due respect, Dr. Coleman, you're not my gran or my therapist.

So while I get you noticed for keeping us in LA, I don't need your help.

Oh, oh no. We used to be so cool.

Hey, I'm still cool.

I look amazing. You're very cool. That song you sent me was sick.

Thank you.

Yeah, I wish I had more time to write, but

now all I do is listen to parenting podcasts.

Well, I'm sorry for ruining your exciting rock star life.

Harper, wait.

I was just...

Wait, I wasn't serious.

Look, I gave up performing, but I have you.

Boy or party.

You blew Kaylin.

I don't think I belong in here.

Just let me handle this.

I've got you.

Harper.

Anna, honey, you just need to pause and reframe.

Thanks, Mom.

What? What did I do?

I was handling it, and you completely undermined me as a parent.

I was trying to help you.

Well, your help isn't helpful.

Well, that's not very nice to say.

Can the great and mysterious Madam Jen interest you ladies in a psychic reading?

No, thank you very much. But right now it's not the...

Time. It's just not really our thing.

This will all be over soon if you just...

Go with it.

Go with it. Yes, exactly.

No, no.

Come on in. Yes, yes, yes.

Okay, I'm sorry.

Anybody else interested?

I do discounts for bigger groups.

And that's how I lost my spot at the Larchmont Farmers Market.

But I did get a table by the lids and free milk counter inside of the Starbucks.

So I am a life coach, but I also do Reiki.

As you'll notice, I have several business

cards because I actually have a business card making business.

So that's the card for that.

I can put quotes on there that I can just make up for you.

If you want something inspirational, for example, I can make up a quote like,

Live your life. Gosh dang it.

Okay, so here's... Oh, and I'm gonna read your poems now.

Oh, really?

Okay.

And then I go.

Anybody like me?

Okay. Smells like you had some appetizers. Were they good?

Good, yeah, yes.

And did you have any mom?

I have no mom.

No, I didn't.

It's a wedding.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Your lifelines.

It's like they've...

...intersected before.

That was strange.

You walked in each other's path.

It's like a crazy path cross that you've learned.

You've learned a lesson. A lesson that may serve you again.

Okay, that's enough.

Okay, I will give these to my neighbors.

I'm onto something here.

One more thing.

Right over there is a QR code that you can tip me with.

Any amount is appreciated. Really.

I didn't know I could do that voice.

Nice, great.

Yo, we know what you did.

What did I do?

What do you mean? The psychic?

Yeah.

Telling her whatever.

Oh, okay, okay.

You think I'd rather solve your problem than deal with my booming culinary inquirer?

Oh, you're happy here for that one.

Are you the psychic?

I need you to look into my future and tell me where we're going to live.

Oh, cool Gen Z talking to me.

If it's not London, I need you to alter my destiny.

And I literally have to stay in Los Angeles.

So that's not really how it works.

Well, how does it work?

Girls, follow my aura.

Beep, beep, beep.

You don't have a lot of lines in your hands, so it makes it harder for me.

You two are called to be family.

Yeah, right.

Don't remind me.

A lesson for you all.

I see it now.

Change the hearts you know are wrong to reach the place where you belong.

Change the hearts you know are wrong to reach the place where you belong.

Change the hearts you know are wrong.

Why is she rhyming like a bridge troll?

Change the hearts you know are wrong to reach the place where you belong.

Earthquake.

Did you feel that?

It must be the dancing.

Yeah, right. We're just freaking ourselves out for no reason.

It's just in our heads.

Right.

With your third forecast.

All cozy and tucked in?

Feel a prediction for the full moon tonight.

We have...

You need anything?

What more could I possibly need?

How about sleeping in our own beds, in our own rooms?

Sweet dreams.

Teenagers.

I was one.

Once.

Yeah, so was I.

Twice.

Night.

Night. Love you.

Love you too, honey.

Change the hearts you know are wrong to reach the place where you belong.

Change the hearts you know are wrong to reach the place where you belong.

Look, I didn't have an alarm.

Why do my hands look so dry?

Why am I so tired?

Rance?

Rance, are you okay?

Why are you are bloody waking me up for? Are you mad?

What? Why do I sound like this?

Sound like what?

American?

Oh, good mom.

Lily, are you okay?

I'm not.

Lily?

You are, but...

No?

No?

No.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm bloody decomposing.

God.

I know.

What is happening to me?

It's mom.

What are you saying?

I'm Grandma, sweetheart.

Oh my gosh.

I've died.

I killed myself.

She just has crevices all over her face.

Look at the crevices.

My hands look like doll hands.

My butt feels so high.

I think I just peed a little.

Oh, my face feels so thirsty and dry.

My face is perfect.

My face looks like a Birkin bag that's been left out in the thunder rot.

Why?

Why do I have to pee again?

This is so much weirder than the last time.

Last time?

What last time?

How come you never told me?

We never told anyone, sweetheart.

Oh, now let's just pause and reframe.

No, no. I didn't want to be a part of this family.

And now I'm part of some dodgy family curse.

And I'm the eldest?

Mom.

And where are her lips?

She has no lips!

Where did they go?

How did we fix this?

Well, you know, last time we switched back

when we saw things from the other perspective.

Should we hold hands?

Hold my hands.

We can... Just... I know I've been hard on you and Eric.

But I can now see that you're doing the right thing.

And, Mom, you have always done so much for me.

And I see you.

I see you.

Are you really seeing me, though?

Because I don't feel anything.

You have no idea how hard I'm seeing you right now.

One, two, three.

Girls, that doesn't work.

Yeah, we tried that last time.

Looking like this is why people like you become shut-ins.

And what's with this accent?

Tomato.

Is that what you think I sound like?

Oh, my God, yes.

Of course, this is what you sound like.

I do not sound like that.

I've never said that in my entire life.

I don't even know what it is.

And then I want to call my energy healer because I need a shocker reset.

Yes, that's what you sound like.

Mahila.

Madam Jen.

I thought she was a psychic.

Ow.

I thought you did sound baths for dogs.

I thought she was a water sommelier.

She did try to sell me knives.

No, well, whatever she is, we have to find her.

But until then... Until then, what?

Well, last time we convinced everyone that we were each other until we switched back.

Oh, brilliant.

So how are we supposed to pull that off?

Panicking is not going to help anyone.

I need to have one sock.

Oh, stop.

My girls, it's going to be great.

Look, Mom, I know I kept it totally together

in front of the girls, but I have to be honest.

I am freaking out right now.

That was you keeping it totally together.

Yes!

No, no, just checking.

Or a photographer.

20% off on our Etsy shop.

I can't get married. I haven't even had a boyfriend yet.

We have to switch back to our body.

At least your body didn't wake up with arthritis.

It's disconnected.

I guess her life coaching business went bust.

I'm supposed to get married this weekend.

What are these?

And how many puffer jackets does someone need?

Breaking master.

What? What'd you find?

I bent down and didn't toot.

Youth really is wasted on the young.

What's with the old tissues in every pocket?

Oh, explain.

No answer, Reiki. But now what?

Did you try our vegan meatloaf truck?

They don't have a number and they only use DoorDash and I don't know how to do that.

I look idly Fisher years old.

I'm literally my mother.

I'm going to need therapy for the rest of my life.

And not the kind from Graham's.

Like the real kind that you have to pay for.

Why does anyone wear these?

Did she say anything like fortune?

No, but maybe she told the girls.

Did the psychic say anything to you about a fortune?

It could be the key to getting out of this.

Wait, she did.

She did?

What was it?

Change the hearts you know are wrong

to reach the place where you belong.

That's about our parents getting married.

L.A., London.

As teenagers, we have no power.

No say in whether we move or stay.

But as adults...

Mom, she didn't say anything to us.

Whoa, I don't know.

You do not hate me.

I am your mother.

So, what do you say?

We need a plan.

DK Donuts.

She'll love those.

Harper, got him.

I'll love them.

Hey girls, how's the sleepover?

Good, very good.

We did teenagers good.

So, here's our plan.

First, these clothes are rubbish.

Just can't.

Can you just give me five minutes?

Why no.

How? Why?

You're in your mom's body.

So, all you have to do is tell my dad.

You don't love him anymore.

Wedding is off.

Done.

Whoa, got some bangs.

What did you do to my hair?

I fixed it.

And you're welcome.

It's cold.

I fixed it.

You can't seriously think you're going to my work dress like this.

Take that off.

You're going to give me five minutes.

What did you do to my hair?

I straightened it.

You never wash your hair.

No, I don't. The ocean washes it for me.

Obviously, the wedding can't happen.

It's Friday. We only have till Sunday.

We got to do some serious sabotage.

The immigration interview.

The rehearsal lunch.

Then, what if we cancel all of the wedding stuff?

The cake, place, people.

And all we have to do is convince our parents that they are incompatible.

Which should not be hard, because my mom obviously

should not be with some wannabe Gordon Ramsay.

Well, my father doesn't want to be with some wannabe Valley Village rocker mom.

Quite like this sexy tiger.

No, no, no. It's an American superstition

that it's bad luck for the bride and groom to kiss before they say I do.

Really? For how long?

For a long time. A long, long time.

Really?

Yeah. Also, no touching hands. No touching at all. No gazing into each other's eyes,

because it's gross. Yeah.

How old?

For maximum luck.

And finally, we must be convincing as them until we break them up.

Lily?

What?

Did you just take Tessa's calcium?

Mm.

Bone health.

You need those.

Yes, I'll be taking them.

You need to take those.

I need a donut back.

No, you can take them.

Very diabetic.

Let's crack on.

Oh, um, well, actually, Lily and I aren't feeling very well. We think it might be a

smart decision to stay home.

This has nothing to do with your detention.

Oh, uh, well, you wouldn't want me to go to school sick, would you, Mom?

You don't feel sick to me?

Does she look sick to you, Grabs? I mean, Mom?

Oh, they look fine.

You have your client, Ella's huge Rolling Stone photo shoot today,

and your immigration interview. Don't you?

You need a little bit of help with that, hmm?

Of course, she needs your help.

I hate kids these days. They'll say anything to get out of school.

Come on, come on, come on, let's go. See you at the dance studio.

Wait, what?

Dance studio?

Let's go. Change at the club. I got your bag.

Change?

This is the finals.

Welcome, everybody, to the Westside Pickleball Championship.

Oh, yeah, you have your championship today.

I think you're going to be late.

Late? Yes, yeah, I'm going to be late.

Okay, newlyweds, you just made your grand entrance into the wedding reception.

The lights begin to dim, and a five, six, seven, eric.

Dimp north.

Oh, right. Like a bull.

Yes. Charge.

Stallion. It's a bull.

Yes.

Get it, groom. Big stallion energy.

All right.

Simple, though.

So look at him.

What?

High contact, come on.

Hi.

Hi.

Tango is your pelvis.

Pickleball, it's a sport like tennis, but it is for.

.. tennis for lazy people.

That's what it is.

It's like tennis, but for non-athletes.

It's a bunch full of nutters.

With giant paddles chasing a waffle ball, it's not bloody Wimbledon, is it?

Here we go.

Okay, that was so aggressive.

What was that?

She almost hit me.

Okay, this is fine.

Up you go.

I think we should go.

No, it's okay. It's fine. This is good.

Right here.

You're just lying on the floor, taking a little nappy poo.

It's not a nappy poo. Tango.

Oh, no, I'm just thinking that maybe the tango isn't very tense.

Um, anything else?

Okay, babe, what else is sexy?

Come on, let's keep our head in the game.

Game point, suckers.

Serena Williams, she's got nothing on the song.

These ladies are making it.

The bawling something beat of hip-hop.

Bop, bop, bop, yes.

A hop and a hip-hop.

I've never seen this kind of hip-hop.

Hip-hop.

She's on the ground. How is she doing that?

That's a new move.

That's defensive offense, defensive offense.

Woman, get up.

You can see that.

What's the load?

Did you see that?

Did we win?

Yes, yes.

One more time.

Take that, boomers.

Okay.

You know what?

First of all, we are mat boomers.

We're Gen X.

We are elder millennials.

Some of the last millennials.

The finale.

The finale.

And five, six, seven, eight, go.

And five.

Oh, yeah.

It's the truth.

And that, oh, we love you.

And Anna.

Oh, baby, because... Anna.

Oh, we're supposed to know where to go.

Look natural, honey.

It didn't use that way.

We need some help.

Okay.

I have an immigration interview, a rehearsal lunch, Alice Big Show, my wedding.

And I am stuck in detention.

But I'm stuck here too.

And it's the jumping chips for the entire west side.

Well, well, well.

Look who showed up.

Lily Reyes and Harper Coleman.

How have you not retired yet?

The school had our pension invested in crypto.

Because I'm not supposed to complain about it per my lawyer.

It's neither here nor there.

So let's surrender our devices.

Let's go.

Really?

And now it's time to prepare for the most

boring task you could ever possibly imagine.

Sit there.

Read or think only.

No screens.

Books.

Wait.

Does he mean hours of uninterrupted peace?

Wipe that look of bliss off your face.

Get over yourself, Elton.

This is high school, not prison.

Yeah, it's not a prison.

Which FYI research shows is ineffective at preventing recidivism.

Yeah, recidivism.

You know, giving back to the community is a

lot more effective than trapping people inside.

Oh.

You want to go outside.

Let us out.

Yeah, let us out.

Let us out.

Let us out.

Let us out.

Let us out.

Let us out.

Let us out.

Move it.

Pick it up.

Out of the way.

Run.

We need to find Madame Gent now.

We need our phones.

Come on, Reyes. You run like my grandma.

Pick it up.

Rude!

Pick up the pace or you'll pick up trash.

It's been two days.

Yeah, I know. I don't care about the deposit.

And the officiant?

Oh, that includes the officiant, too.

Cancel that, too.

Thank you.

Call from Jet. Answer it.

Is this for real?

Yes.

Where are you? The editor for Rolling Stone did here.

Oh, no.

Remember, it's the hungry tour.

Trevor's allergic to strawberries.

Look sweet, Ella.

Ella's having a meltdown.

Hello, my staff of people that I see all the time.

Where's your dish?

Oh, thank you.

All right, so she's only here by this...

Oh, girl.

Why would you give me that to drink?

You'd yell at me if I don't.

Anna!

Jane Shorts, Rash Guard, Laundry Day.

Let's talk about the headline for the article.

It's giving it, girl.

Pop star Queen Ella slays down the house.

Wait.

Or we're gagging besties.

Ella's new album just hits different.

No, no, just stop.

What deeply out of touch old person came up with those?

You did.

I did?

Wow.

Thanks, Puss.

Okay, I really need you to focus on Ella right now.

Okay.

Don't say that.

Ella?

Trevor unfollowed me. And you know what that means?

No.

That's what it means.

The whole world knows that he dumped me.

It's everywhere.

Okay, I am your manager, so I'm going to manage this.

Ryan, I really do need to dash.

Yeah, but they sent the photographers back in five minutes.

Yeah.

For your new passport photo, the one you

need for the international part of your book.

Oh, yes.

I remember every detail that you told me about me.

Yeah, I got prescriptions. You got the essentials.

Essentials?

Yes.

Do I need all these things?

I can do that. Yes.

Where does this go?

Don't mappies. That is so lazy.

Oh, hey.

Yes, right here.

Fix it in?

Yes. Isn't that toothpaste for old people?

No. This is for when you lose your teeth.

Don't lose my teeth.

No!

Okay, slowcoats. I want every blue spirulina smooth spill gone.

I want every chia seed scraped.

Every toothpiece of organic gum on the bottom of these seats gone!

Way to go, Harper.

No, this was Lily's fault.

Elton.

Yeah?

I understand that you feel the need to prove a

point because I publicly undermined your authority.

How?

Do you understand me?

This isn't restorative justice. I mean, if anything,

you're making these kids want to act out more.

How does Lily always manage to make things worse?

It's a unique talent.

I have connections on the school board, Elton.

Well, you're a stupid kid and you have no connections, but you have

earned, along with everybody here, three more weeks of detention.

Oh, Lily!

Lily!

That was uncalled for. Let's all take a deep, centering breath.

I'm gonna hang on this.

Take a deep breath of this trash.

You ready?

Stunning.

Wow.

Good, right?

I think you're having an allergic reaction.

No, no, no, no. It's rip-pumper.

I want to get some ice.

Okay, give me the ring light.

Every bottle of Benadryl, I can find it.

It's rip-pumper.

No, right? I don't have apple juice.

Okay, whatever. Do you have enough of a ring light? Like a big ring light?

Sure.

I need to take... Can you make that?

Do you have the ring light? I'll pop.

Okay, ready?

You got it.

Let me do it. Hold on.

Oh, no.

This is 10, maybe 50 more. I'll just do the look, okay?

All right, I'll go.

Dear sir, I must cancel the wedding venue because the

bride is horrible, as my daughter always suspected.

Oh, who's Laura?

Hello, hello.

Hey, hon. I need your approval on the author photo.

Okay.

Oh, no, no, no. That one's rubbish. I just took a new one. I'm sending now.

Oh, look. Her phone has the giant letter virus.

Oh! Ryan, is it possible for you to drop me at Anna's work?

Hey, you, Trevorheads. That was your boy, Trevor Travis,

with his brand new song, Better Than The Last One.

My mom's biggest client is having a meltdown.

Jet, I'm working.

Trevor, her boyfriend dumped her.

Trevor Travis?

Shh! She's so much better, better, better than her last one.

And they just got matching tattoos.

That is literally the worst thing I have ever

heard happening to anyone, ever, full stop.

Thank you.

Of course.

Anna's getting married, so she doesn't get what it's like to have her heart broken.

Oh, I know. When I was your age, my mom, I mean, I had this

boyfriend, Jake, and all my friends say he was my first love.

Is that who your song's about?

What song? My song?

I wrote that? It's really good. This is a great song.

Nor really good. I don't get why you quit playing.

Because I had a kid who I probably resent since I'm writing songs in secret.

So you miss performing?

I mean, yeah, probably. Finding out a lot about myself today.

Anna, your song is the only song I loved out of everything that we got sent.

I know you already said no, but can I please sing it at the Wilton tomorrow?

I mean, it's your concert, your tour. You should sing whatever song you want.

Okay. Yeah, I feel like between managers and stylists and execs and

label people, I feel like I never get a say in anything that goes on.

Right! Right, because old people never listen. I mean, people like you think...

I think people like me think people like you don't know... you know what I mean.

Yeah. I have control over my own life. Absolute control. Photo shoots back on.

Photo shoot is back on, grasshoppers! Jump, jump, jump!

Let's make some fierce photos of this fierce girl.

I think a job is really hard.

Wait.

What, wait, what?

If your mom wrote that song about that Jake, that's how we can get our

parents to split up forever. So if she is with him, she can't marry my dad.

Well, how do we find him?

It's like a database of old people. Jake.

Oh, that's him. Yes, from the photo.

Wait, wait, wait, look. Okay.

Oh, and he owns the record parlor.

He has liked all your mom's posts. He is proper obsessed with her.

Single. Okay. Let's do it.

Let's do it. But first, your mom must look fit if she's going

to run into the love of her life, and I need a change too.

Ellis Stylus has pulled the most gorgeous garms I've ever seen in my entire life.

Do we love this for me?

Girl, the label of this for you. Can we just put it on here?

But just a baby on your shoulder?

No.

Please, can we just put our differences aside so that I can live my dream?

Please.

This is only because of the plan.

No, thank you.

You're welcome.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Not very me.

It's so exciting.

So, come zoom for the camera. It's very different.

Find the shape and then hold it.

Good luck.

I'm sorry. Where did the proof go?

This is cool.

It's recycled, I think.

No, no, no.

Tess, interstyling is so one point. You two are the coolest adults I have ever met.

Thanks.

Bye.

Thank you.

My mom does have a cool job.

I think she's our new best friend. I think so.

I think so.

Do you guys need a ride?

Oh, yes, totally. Yes.

Attention students. You'll be happy to know that my anaphylactic shock has decided.

Yes, I didn't die.

Thank you.

And I hope those who were involved in that food fight are loving the tension.

Oh, no.

They've gone completely rogue.

What are we wearing?

They're on a joyride with Ela. You'll never find them.

No. But we can find Madame Jen.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Oh, yeah.

Madame Jen says she lost a table at the Largemont Farmer's Market,

but now she can be seen at the Starbucks across the

street from the Largemont Village wine and cheese shop.

Look, I know we don't have time.

But we are here.

And my metabolism is the speed of sound.

I got a true scream!

My knees work!

I'm not real dairy.

I'm Bushworth president.

Curly prize! Flexibility!

We really need to find Madame Jen.

Yes, well, they have onion rings on their burgers.

Sugar.

But off to this. Back to the mission.

It has my full finger.

All you have to do is go in there and flirt with Jake

and remind him why he fenced you when you were young.

Wait, it wasn't me when I was young. And I don't know how to flirt.

And I definitely don't know how to flirt as an old person.

But what do they do?

Talk about transitional lenses? Home repairs? John Mayer?

I don't... Oh, I have an idea. We both wear our AirPods.

That way you can help me because you have a French boyfriend.

So you definitely know how to flirt.

Yeah. Defo. Yes.

I'm gonna go in and then I'll give you the word

when to come in and make your sexy grand entrance.

What sexy grand entrance? What do you mean?

You have to be sexy.

How?

Sexy.

I'm not doing that.

Oh.

Oh.

Hey.

This is a different look.

Yeah. Uh-huh.

It's awesome. I didn't know you were coming by today. I got the stuff in the bag.

What stuff? What do you mean?

That's him. That's our bloke.

What's happening?

He's going to get me stuff.

What is your mother doing behind my father's back?

Shh.

No. Hey. Hey. Hey.

Shh. Shh. Shh. Okay. Get down.

He can't hear me. Get down. I'm ignoring you.

Hey, thanks again for doing this.

What exactly are we doing here?

Signing the merch for the charity auction.

Oh.

All right. Here you go.

Right. The merch.

Oh.

I have a question.

Do you ever think about me? About us?

I'm not sure there's a right answer to this question.

I mean, do you ever miss us?

You can marry this weekend.

Unless I'm not.

Very good. Now do some blue cheeky.

Like, lip your hair.

Good.

Oh, good. Big, big, big moves.

Big moves. One more.

Shake your head. Shake it.

More.

Like, all the way around.

There you go. Shake it.

Excellent.

Okay. Um, wink at him. Try winking.

Wink.

Wink.

Wink.

Wink.

One eye. One eye.

Now do both.

Wink.

Okay.

Good.

Okay. Um, that's not working. Um, uh, oh, bite your lip.

Bite your lip.

What? Why is he looking at you like that?

He's wearing my lip.

No, not your top lip, your bottom lip.

Buy your bottom lip. Like that.

Howdy.

I know what this is. I've seen this before.

You're having a stroke.

We need to get you out.

No, no, I just need you to go to the bathroom.

I just need you to go to the bathroom.

It's in the back.

All right, I'll find it.

Are you sure?

There's no merch in the...

I was really bad at that. So bad at that.

How do you know your boyfriend liked you?

Um, you just know.

Huh? How? Like, specifically.

You've dated a guy, you know this, you have experience.

Tell me. Help me out here.

Harper, I... I don't have a friend-boyfriend.

My entire dating experience is watching 500 hours of Love Island.

Wait, you're like the most confident person I know.

It's an act.

What?

Well, you're not gonna tell everyone, are you?

No. I'm not like that. I wouldn't do that.

Okay, thank you.

Oh, you're not gonna hug me, are you?

No, I was just...

No, don't do that.

Okay, it was just... All right, look. No, we should get back out there, right?

Because otherwise he'll think I'm pooping.

Matthew, I see you're wiped by the milk.

And I see your spring writing career taking off.

If you move over to, um... Genre?

Genre, yes. Genre.

Elevated genre?

Um, no. Sorry.

You!

Oh. Um, how can I help?

Take one wild guess.

Are you gonna serve me papers?

We switched bodies.

Oh. Oh, my gosh.

It actually worked.

That's amazing. It's never worked before.

Um, would you guys mind leaving me a review or like five stars and just saying like,

oh, my gosh, Madam Genre was so much fun to work with.

Tell us how to switch back right now.

Okay, all right. Um, I'll consider it.

If you sign up for my Reiki and financial management package...

Tell us how to switch back, you multi-hyphenate lunatic.

Oh, my gosh. I am a multi-hyphenate.

That absolutely slays.

I'm supposed to get married in two days. Right.

Okay. Um, all right. Well, you have to look at the reading.

That's the only way.

We don't know the reading.

Um, what are you talking about?

I said the reading directly to you both multiple times in a scary whisper voice.

Because we weren't there.

But that wasn't...

Right. Oh, right. You weren't you.

Because you had switched with the other women who are...

Okay, that's... and it makes sense.

Um, okay. Well... The reading was...

Didn't we try that? I think we tried that.

Okay, well, the problem is...

Your hearts might not be the only ones that need changing.

So...

Cute.

Well, our time is up.

Wait, but no, no, no. There's got to be something else.

You can do, right?

I wish I could help you, but my shift is starting.

So what I can do for you is get you a Cortado and Americano,

a Prince of May, and any kind of espresso or non-espresso drink.

It's your dad. Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot.

Uh, excuse me.

Tess?

What are you doing down there?

Stretching.

Uh, yeah, I...

Anna didn't... she didn't tell me that you were gonna be here today.

Oh, what interview? I mean, yes, I know the interview. Now?

I was just thinking about you the other day.

Really?

I've been meaning to ask you something.

Sure.

And, um, I don't quite know how to broach the subject,

but is, um, is your husband... is he still with us?

Yeah, I can't believe it. I mean, he's so old.

How old is he?

We never talk about it. I'm somewhere between 50 and 100.

Really?

Yeah, yeah, but, okay. Let me focus for a second.

I'm worried about Anna, all right? She's been being weird with me,

and she keeps asking if I ever think about her.

You know, maybe she is reconsidering.

Reconsidering?

Uh-huh.

Three weeks ago, she told me how in love she is with Eric.

Do you know that she wrote a song about you?

No.

Anna?

Daughter?

Why don't you tell Jake about the song you wrote?

I wrote a song about us.

You know what? I'll give you your privacy.

I'm just gonna go look for music for old people.

You know, really old, like Coldplay.

It's nice to hear you're writing again.

Yeah, can you just give me a second, brah? Just one second.

Coldplay.

We need to get to the immigration interview now.

Okay, let's go. Wait.

Oh, my legs are so weak, my knees are cracking like walnuts.

What is happening right now?

My brain is telling my body to stand up, but it's like shouting into the abyss.

See, I just tried to get up again. Okay, help me.

Okay, we have to find a way to get to the immigration interview.

Okay, okay.

Wait, I have an idea.

Oh, Jake.

Hi.

Could we borrow your car?

Oh, and don't worry, we are totally of age to drive.

Anything for you to drive to see.

You ready? Hold on.

Oh, that's a woman after my heart.

I love driving.

I don't know who taught you how to drive, but they were good.

Thank you.

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

You're gonna get us killed.

Oh, geez.

Help!

I can't look, I can't look.

I know, I'm a very good driver.

Hey, nice car.

It's totally mine.

You think he's cute?

I do not.

You totally do.

Stop, I do not.

Yes, you do.

I do not.

She thinks you're cute.

I do not.

Yes, she does.

I do.

She so does.

I do.

Thanks.

Dr. Coleman.

Coleman.

That's my therapist.

You nervous?

Oh, why would I be? We're perfect for each other.

You'll see.

Oh, that's cryptic.

Coleman Reyes.

Ah, yes, that's us.

I love so many ruffles.

There you go.

How are you?

Oh, I was just dumped by my fiancé, so, you know.

Oh, no, I'm so sorry.

Oh, what a decent thing to say. Thank you.

Yes, of course.

Are you single?

Kidding.

Can I see your paperwork?

Ah, yes.

Yeah, I'm sure you're approved.

Wait, whoa, don't you need to see if we really know each other?

I mean, usually, yeah, but he seems like such

a kind and honest man who clearly works out.

Oh, a lot.

I mean, you could be a gymnast.

I did once qualify to represent the U.K. in pool vaulting.

Really?

I'd still like for us to prove that we, you know, are marriage material.

So, what's my favorite road trip snack?

A 7-Eleven hot dog dipped in blue slurpee.

Dream vacay?

Taking the girls to the Galapagos.

Harper would love the biodiversity.

I think Lily could really benefit from the dirt,

though she really just wants to see a...

Komodo dragon in the wild.

What's her favorite animal?

Oh, these are too, too easy.

You got to hit me with the hard stuff.

What is my guilty pleasure pump-up song?

Uh, darling, I...

I promised to never divulge that highly classified intimate.

See?

He doesn't know me at all.

See? We can't get married.

It's... it's Chubba Wamba.

She told you?

Wait, creepy crawling or something?

I get knocked down.

I get up again.

You're never gonna keep me down.

I get knocked down.

I get knocked down.

But I get up again.

You're never gonna keep me down.

That's the one, yeah.

Pissing the night away.

Oh, wow.

Oh, Danny boy.

Danny boy.

Danny boy.

Danny was my fiance's name.

Okay, enough.

What's my deepest darkest fear?

Oh, that you're left for Harper.

I need to protect her.

We'll push her away rather than bring her close.

And then she'll run away and be a surf bum,

and then she'll get a dodgy tattoo with the sun around her belly button.

But you're a phenomenal mom.

And Harper is amazing.

That's all that'll never happen.

Well, that was really sweet.

I know that.

You know, I approve hundreds of marriages that probably won't even last a year.

But you too.

Thank you.

Next.

Well done. We got approved.

My seafood vendor says we can sweat.

I should deal with this.

Bet. Yeah, my mom's almost here.

Okay, uh, bye.

What a lot next, huh?

Hop in my fridge. How'd it go?

Your dad knows a lot about my mom.

I think he really loves her.

But did you do enough to break them up?

I don't know.

I need to clear my mind.

Can we go somewhere?

Yes. Yeah. Get in.

Don't drive so fast.

Fuck off.

Change the hearts you know are wrong to reach the place where you belong.

What do you think she meant by that?

I think she made it all up.

But look on the right side, honey.

This suit is so much fun.

Why have we never done this before?

Because you already have one fake hip and you do not need another.

Very funny. I'll have you now in this body.

I, too, really... Help!

Whoa!

Whoa!

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

Nothing broke.

We're invincible!

Bone density!

Girls, get in the car.

How do kids get away with anything anymore?

You know, I hated you a little less today.

I think it's hard to hate me when I look like your gran.

No.

And...

I hated you a little less today, too.

No.

I just don't understand how anyone can dislike California.

It's like a wrong opinion.

Hopper, you can't have a wrong opinion.

I mean, look around.

Yes, okay, Hopper, it's lovely. It's lovely.

I just...

I miss England.

We can talk about her, if you want.

No, thanks.

I think if I talk about her, I'm giving away what little of her I've left.

And why are you so obsessed that I like Los Angeles?

Well, I'm not.

Yes, you are, no?

Yes.

And look, even if I liked it a little bit here, I mean...

You... you still don't want me around.

Obviously not.

Obviously not.

I guess it's a good thing we're stopping this wedding.

Yeah.

Where are they? They're supposed to be home by now.

This is very good.

A little dry.

Very fruitful wood. And by fruit, I mean grapes.

Your lack of concern...

It's not working.

Just stay calm, honey.

Stay calm?

I've got the rehearsal lunch, the final dress fitting, and my wedding

is in 36 hours, and I'm trapped in the body of a ninth grader.

I did. I told you so.

Oh, you both certainly did not.

What difference does it make, anyway?

Where on earth have you been?

Well... Can't two adult women come home when they please?

What do you think you're doing driving around like that with Ella all day?

Ella, we won't do a fashion shoot.

We need to talk to you, by the way.

You need to get more attention.

Why am I dressed like that?

I need more attention than my designs.

She has a lot of stuff to talk to you about.

Shh, Brian.

Okay, I don't care about that right now.

Did you make it to the immigration interview?

Yes, I did. Just like chill, okay? Or do your weird breathing.

I think stuff that you do.

Chill?

I am the adult here. I am in charge.

It doesn't look like it.

You just earn yourselves a consequence.

Oh, no.

No.

Give me your phones.

Sure.

Psych.

By the way, you're the reason this is all falling.

Shut up.

No, I'm not.

Yes, it totally is.

And don't tell me.

Girls, this is serious.

We all need to start getting along unless we want to be stuck like this forever.

You know, you lot are getting the better end of this deal.

It's us who are going to be dead in like five years.

She's 37.

I'm 36 and a half!

While you two are out having fun, we found Madam Jen.

She made us buy business cards for everyone and a Reiki 10 pass.

What even is Reiki?

Huh? What is it?

Stop talking about Reiki.

Well, Madam Jen said to change your hearts, so change your freaking dang hearts.

It's the only way for us to get out of this mess.

Oh, I'm switching to Rhett.

Do you want one?

You're making Mom and Gary stress.

You better use Reiki now!

I just came for a coming back.

Okay, Blue Crush.

Look at you, shredding the waves, dude.

You never use those words again.

Wait, what are you doing here?

A lesson.

What lesson?

Seven lessons.

But it looks like you're all ready to surprise Harper and take her out.

Oh, yeah, that's really going to surprise Harper.

Obviously.

Oh, no, I just ate a bowl of onions.

In the water?

Yeah, they keep me alert.

Okay, I think.

Look, I know it feels like we're in an impossible situation.

Maybe that's why things felt better off with us.

Yeah, probably.

Yeah, but Anna...

I think we should stay in LA.

What about Lily?

Going back to London, the Cambridge Hall is not going to bring back a mum.

And there's no one keeping us there anymore.

If I'm honest, you felt so lost.

So what she needs is to be with family.

A gran like Tess, a sister like Harper.

Thank you.

What, Anna?

It's just...

I can't believe how much you love me and my family.

It's like real true love. It's just... it's crazy.

Okay. Well, you made it look so easy. I'm going to give it a go.

Oh, I don't know if that... Maybe I've improved as much as you!

Oh!

Wait, I'm going to win for Luke's structure.

I mean, you're amazing. You're like weaving and dodging and... I feel like a person.

I'm glad it fits perfectly. Anna, come look.

Oh, wow.

Sweetheart.

Thanks for your posture.

This is weird.

Weirder for me, trust me.

Really? Are you the one wearing your mum's wedding dress?

Well, I never thought I'd get to have this experience, especially like this.

Well, Mom, you know how much I love to wear a dress.

Sorry, this is such a mess, Harper.

Mom, there's something I need to tell you.

What were you talking to my dad about this morning?

Oh, we were just talking about the lunch.

What about the lunch?

It's just lunch stuff.

The lunch?

I'm just going to make a quick call.

Okay.

Oh, hi. It's Tess.

Listen, last minute, but Anna was wondering if

you might like to attend her rehearsal luncheon.

No, you would not be in a position. You know what?

I think your appearance there would make it a much more lively affair.

So, I just wanted to say that I'm very excited.

And being at my new restaurant makes it all the more

special for all of us to finally come together as a family.

So with that said, welcome to Lily's.

Congratulations.

Thank you for coming, really. Eric and I so appreciate it.

Right.

Champagne, ladies?

Yes, please.

Because we're adults.

Eric's parents are here, so best behavior, please.

Stand up straight. Good posture.

Anna, my soon-to-be daughter, my heart is so full.

That's me.

How was your flight?

It was 13 hours and 13 minutes from Manila.

Major Jedi, some worse than others.

But I really love it here.

Maybe Harper can teach me the surf.

Sure, dude.

Manapolola.

You're so silly. Only Lily calls me Lola.

But I want to support your Tagalog learning.

Keep it up.

Come on, Anna.

No, no, no.

We have to wait for the surprise guest.

What are you talking about?

Oh, just wait.

Hello, sir. Welcome.

No, thank you.

Jake.

What's he doing here?

I invited him, but I didn't think he'd come.

But, you know, he really likes you. Gran.

My mom's going to freak out.

I know, so will my dad. That was the whole point.

Oh, you.

Dr. C. Thank you for inviting me.

I saved your number. I hope that's okay.

Of course.

Hi, there.

Hey.

I think I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

Now.

But, you know, your mom, she really wanted me here.

Right, I'm sure.

Well...

Okay.

I got you.

Thank you so much. You're the best, bro.

No, no, no, no. Wait, wait.

Oh, thank goodness.

I will read it right back.

Jake, don't go.

Tess. Tess.

Can we have a chat later? It's regarding Lily.

Oh, it's regarding Lily. We should chat now.

My big sister Anna.

After every atomic wedgie you gave me,

I always knew that you also had an atomic heart.

Anna and I decided we should all stay in LA.

What?

Yes.

What? Everyone?

Yes.

As a therapist, I was hoping to get your thoughts on the best way to approach Lily.

But I know how you feel about Bill Boulau,

so we can chat later. Bill?

Okay, okay.

Ew.

Bloody backstabber.

I know what you taste.

All right, who wants to speak next?

Father of the groom looks ready.

No, no, I have a few choice words for the bride.

I would like to make a toast.

That's crystal.

We have a toasting triangle.

Oh, piss off.

All right.

I would like to make a toast.

To your future husband, so that he knows

what kind of woman he is getting married to.

Oh, he does. He does. He does.

He knows who he's marrying,

and he can make his own decisions,

and he knows not to be manipulated by other people.

Yes.

Hey, Gramps, this is between us.

Listen to your husband.

You listen to me.

Ella, what does she want?

Micro cilantro from the foothills of Oaxaca.

It was not my fault that micro cilantro

is bursting with flavor.

But it is your fault that the cilantro has no loyalty.

What are they doing? We have to stop them.

Are you doing all right, Orla?

Oh, Ella, this is the last thing I need.

Oh, Jake's back already. Jake?

Jake, what are you doing here?

It was all her, I swear.

Really? And then you all?

That's Anna's ex-boyfriend.

What?

I did her ex-boyfriend?

Because she still has feelings for him.

Okay, that's not bad.

After the appetizer, Anna said she wasn't feeling well, so I went...

Right, I wasn't feeling well.

Okay, but not from the food here. The food is fine.

Too fishy, no food. It's fish.

It is not the food. She's just on her period. That's all.

She's on her period.

I'm online right now. I got it.

I didn't really know where you were on your cycle.

I know, dude. It's fine, thanks.

Can someone please explain to me what's going on here?

No, no, don't let her.

She shouldn't explain anything because she will just lie.

She lied.

Me?

Yeah, I trust him.

I know that you don't know what he said to me. You weren't there. You didn't hear it.

I don't think this marriage should happen.

Well, you know what? It's not just about what you want.

It isn't.

It's about what she wants and she... Ever about what I want.

It's always about what you want.

Everyone wants this.

Okay, that's enough.

Well, yes, some of them do.

Hey, that's enough.

The girls fighting is one thing, but this is your mum.

And for some reason, your ex-boyfriend is here.

Yeah.

Anna, I love you, but you're clearly having second thoughts.

This isn't working for our families, and we always said we put our families first.

So...

We can't do this.

Mike, I'll do this.

Lily, help your grandparents. I'll meet you at the ballet.

The wedding's off.

He's right. It's over.

Wait, no!

Wait, please, please, please, no!

I'm so sorry. I promise I didn't mean for this to happen.

I think you did.

Well... Yes, we did it.

Yeah.

I know this isn't the best time, but can I have my car back?

Maybe later.

She seems upset.

No, she just needs some space.

What about you? Are you doing okay?

Oh, yeah. I'm always okay.

It would be fair if you want. That all got pretty crazy.

I worry what'll happen when Tess doesn't have those two to drive her crazy.

You're worried about her.

I'm worried Tess will be really lonely, if all of you are implemented.

You're a good guy, Ryan.

Thank you.

Go on. Maybe this isn't for me to fix.

Mind if I join you?

Okay.

Okay.

Are you okay?

I haven't seen my dad that upset.

Since my mum died.

And it was all my fault.

You know, when Ryan asked me to marry him,

I thought a lot about what Anna and Harry's dad would have said.

How he would have felt about it.

I think he'd be so happy for us.

That we found someone who loved us all so much.

I think my mum would feel the same way.

I know.

I really miss her.

I know.

She would be so disappointed.

No.

Yes, she would. Yes, she would.

Because I was very selfish.

Was. No.

I was.

And I know it.

No.

She'd know.

Your heart.

I shouldn't... find my dad.

Yeah.

And Aunt Apologise.

Why are you walking so fast?

I can't walk as fast as you.

Ella keeps texting me the word urgent and her show starts right now.

But what about Eric? I think we should go back, Mum.

I thought there was a way to make everyone happy that there's not.

But I think that we should go back for Eric. I really should.

Come on, just my client needs me.

Go, go, go, go, go, go!

Don't go! Stop the car!

Don't go! Stop the engine!

I'm not. The engine's not even on.

We're going anywhere.

Come on, he loves you!

Jelly, is everything okay?

Yeah, everything's fine.

Okay.

I wonder what the big emergency was.

Surprise!

What are you doing here?

Ella said you said you misperformed me.

Yeah, and that you told her she could do any song she wanted to.

You did.

The dressing room is right around the corner.

Put this on.

Well, because we're not fifteen anymore, dolphins.

Wait a minute.

Okay, let me know when she's ready.

Crazy. I can't believe you're making me do this.

Don't make fun of my dress.

I'm sorry.

This is all my fault.

Lily and I tried to sabotage you and Eric.

And I tried to make him fall out of love with

you, but I couldn't because he loves you so much.

And Mom, you shouldn't have to give that up for me.

Just like you gave up being a rock star.

And I know you've been secretly writing songs in private.

What?

You know, the one about Jake?

What are you talking about?

I'm your good and I'm your bad because you're my baby and love was made to last.

Harper, that song is not about Jake.

That song is about you.

About me?

Of course it is.

Harp.

Mom, I'm sorry that I said I wanted to stay with Gramps if you left.

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry that I made you think that you had

to choose between being together or being at home.

I choose you every time.

Okay. We gotta go.

Oh, look, we look like a grown up. Let's go.

Where am I going now?

Let's go.

Do you excuse me? I have to go get heavy.

No, no, no, no, please.

I know.

I said I didn't want this wedding to go on, but that's not true.

It's just not... I... I'm scared.

And I think I realized that I didn't want to share someone I love.

I appreciate that.

But wait, but please. You still love Anna. You still want to get married.

I... Do you?

I... Do you love her?

I love Anna.

Do you want to marry her?

I want to marry Anna.

But then what?

But it's not about me.

Lily is the most important person in my life.

And I worry every day of messing up as a parent.

Okay, I am on my own.

I lost a mom and I am so scared of losing her.

So I have to put her first.

What if you were right all along?

What if...

I thought so too.

But after all this...

I'm not sure.

I am.

A little surprise.

Guest for you.

Give it up for one of my favorite bands, Pink Slap!

Pink Slap, Pink Slap, Pink Slap, Pink Slap, Pink Slap!

Pull like this.

Like what?

Yes.

No.

No.

Yes, you can.

You know what?

Wait, can we just... can we stop for a second?

Sorry, and I just...

I want to bring out the person that I wrote this song for.

She means everything to me.

And I love her so much.

I know that family isn't always easy.

But family is everything.

She also plays guitar way better than me.

So please welcome my daughter, Harper.

Ready to do this?

Together?

Yeah.

I just keep on coming back.

I'm your good and I'm your bad,

because you're my baby.

What are we doing here?

Mrs. Silly, Anna and I are... I'm madly in love. I know.

We tried. We really did. It's just not...

No, no, no, no. Please, just give us one more chance.

Please.

Trust us.

I just...

Wait, is that... is that Anna?

Only I can be is the pain, because you're my baby.

Excuse me.

Ella, gave me these yesterday. Come with me.

Come with me.

Are we good to be here?

Yes, we should be.

Is Ella wearing one of my designs?

It was Anna's idea.

I'm your bad, I'm your good and I'm your bad,

because you're my baby.

And love is made to last.

I'm your sunshine, I'm your rain.

Only I can be is the pain,

because you're my baby.

Oh, because you're my baby, baby, baby, baby.

I always choose you to...

This family is exactly where I belong.

Wait.

Are you sure?

All right, let's just... let's just...

Thank you lots are out there, and you'll still have me.

I can't wait for that.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Did you know she could do that?

Not at all.

We did it!

Yes!

You two did it, you did it together.

She did.

No.

Wherever my sister is, it's where I want to be.

Me too.

I'm too thin, too fat, you ask why.

So why, so why, so why, so why.

On and on and on and on.

On and on and on and on.

Don't wanna grow up, I wanna get out.

Hey, take me away, I wanna shout.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Yes, I do.

Away, away, away, away.

I wanna shout, I'll take me away, away, away, away, away.

I can't believe you just did that.

I know.

So what do you say?

Will you marry me?

One condition.

I'm kissing you early.

Hi, Jake.

Dr. Coleman.

Oh, this is, this is Bette.

I just met, but, uh, there is something about her.

Yes. Nice dress.

Thank you.

Did you hear that? Nice dress, she likes your dress.

Thanks for coming, everybody.

Hi, Mom.

Here we are.

Wait.

What did you do?

It's called lip clumping.

Run.

It could be worse. It could be worse.

It could not be worse.

I mean, it's okay.

Just testing out a new look.

Cameras A Marker.

Hi, everybody. Welcome to Freaky or Friday.

What?

Ryan, I'm Ryan. I can't.

It's so good you can't do it.

What?

What?

What? That's the right banana.

No, no, no, no.

Banana.

I have mystery date.

Truth is, I bet you the dud is very hot now.

I see.

Are we talking about a board game?

Jamie just turned around like this.

She was like, Mom?

Yes.

Okay, I'm locking in.

We have to find her. But until then.

Until then, what?

I don't know why I keep going... Pissing the night away.

Johnny boy.

Okay, Jamie, reach for the enema box.

She said 29 donuts.

She's giving me the donut.

Tommy, you'll preside that too.

Woof woof.

I must eat those.

You learned a lesson.

My God, it could be a pirate, huh?

Aww, you can't see that.

Put on my jumper, eat my...

Thank you.

You wanna fight, fight, fight, fight too!

Let's fight!

Let us out! Let us out!

Do you wanna be fired?

Just in here.

Anna Louise Coleman, do you think...

Yes, it is your middle name.

That's different.

Was that the Pink Power Ranger?

I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Let's not, let's not, let's not.

Oh my God!

What the hell is she?

Is that a pepto bismol? What is she doing?

Here we are, in the pelvis.

Like, peanut butter molasses.

Peanut butter molasses.

Were any of those teenagers a bad boss, Betty?

No.

I'm sorry.

Boo.

Good. More?

Lily's the boss.

What are you doing down there?

Just crawling.

Look at the road!

I got caught!

That was fun!

Thank you for watching, we love you so much.

Thanks for coming.

I think I just peed.

Okay, load.